# Someone Riding YOUR Horse WITHOUT Permission



## jillmarie819 (Feb 7, 2014)

Has anyone ever had an experience where someone was riding your horse without permission? Or any similar stories? 

I recently found out that my boyfriends little sister, who absolutely hates me with a passion, was riding my horse behind my back for a while. She has no idea what she was doing, and seems to think of herself as a "trainer" at 17-years-old. Clues that let me know something was up were: 
-Her grandma (who boards at my barn as well) sending me messages thanking me for letting her ride my horse. Her grandma was under the assumption that I allowed her to, which is false. Dead giveaway she was riding my mare.
-The barn owner (whom I've known for years, as he is a family friend) calling and texting me multiple times letting me know she was riding my horse when he would catch her in the act, and her telling him she had permission. He finally told her she needed to stop because she was lying that she had permission. Again, another dead giveaway.
-My horse being scared ****less of being saddled and running away from anyone who got near her, as well as breaking off of the crossties whenever she was tied. (My mare is 10-years-old. I have owned her since she was one and worked with my current trainer since the first day I got her. She is finished and very quiet. I have shown her since she was a two-year-old, we have even used her as a lesson horse for young children with disabilities.)
-My mares gaits being all screwed up. She no longer understands the cue for lope and has seem to "forgot" her lead changes, pivots, sidepassing, etc. As soon as I found out someone was riding her behind my back, I noticed my mare didn't walk on a lead very well. She would swing her butt all around and couldn't seem to just respect walking in a straight line. Not only that, she wouldn't allow anyone to put her halter on her for a while.

Anyone else have experience with anything like this? It makes me so sick and I have thought a lot about taking legal action, but being that she is my boyfriends sister makes it more difficult because of conflict with his family as a result. What would you do/have you done in a situation like this?? Any help and advice would be appreciated.


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## Golden Horse (Feb 20, 2010)

When people were telling you your mare was being ridden, they weren't exactly clues where they, you had the info there!

I don't know the timescale here , but if you had been told about it and did nothing to stop it then potentially it could be argued that you were compliant, if you did nothing to stop it at that stage.

Now I would be beyond furious in the situation, I don't want anyone riding my horse without my permission, but I have no idea if there is any recourse you can take now it has happened.


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## franknbeans (Jun 7, 2007)

I am not sure what you want us to say or do. Is she still riding the horse? If so, it needs to stop. Like YESTERDAY. What did you say when her grandma thanked you? If, at THAT instant you did not let her know in no uncertain terms this was not ok-then you have some blame too. Sounds like you knew it was happening for a bit and did nothing, and now want to act?

I can only tell you what I would do. I would make darn sure she and all of her family and friends were well aware that this is NOT acceptable, in any way shape or form. She and them need to know that is it happens again, the police will be called. Period.


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## jillmarie819 (Feb 7, 2014)

franknbeans said:


> I am not sure what you want us to say or do. Is she still riding the horse? If so, it needs to stop. Like YESTERDAY. What did you say when her grandma thanked you? If, at THAT instant you did not let her know in no uncertain terms this was not ok-then you have some blame too. Sounds like you knew it was happening for a bit and did nothing, and now want to act?
> 
> I can only tell you what I would do. I would make darn sure she and all of her family and friends were well aware that this is NOT acceptable, in any way shape or form. She and them need to know that is it happens again, the police will be called. Period.


_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## jillmarie819 (Feb 7, 2014)

No, she is not still riding my horse. As soon as her grandma thanked me, I called her up and got no answer, so I sent her a text making it very clear she is not allowed anywhere near my horse, point blank. After that, I felt confident it stopped until my horse started acting VERY unlike herself, almost dangerous. So to answer your question, I acted as soon as I found out about it, and you can bet I was ****ed. If I take legal action, will police really do anything? Or will they tell me it is more of a civil matter?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Luvs Horses (Jan 9, 2014)

Don't be afraid to step up just because she is your boyfriend's sister. She is taken serious advantage of you and getting away with ruining your horse.

You need to set firm bounderies ASAP and nip this in the bud. 

I have read many posts where horse owners have found out someone was riding their horses without permission. This is a form of stealing and there is serious liability if the perp gets their dumb butt hurt or they could cause your horse to go lame.

Put up a sign if she is stalled that states No One is Allowed to handle or ride without written consent by owner. 

Thank the BO for letting you know about what is happening and ask him to call the police the next time she tries it.

Let your boyfriends family know charges will be pressed should she show up again to ride as she does not have your permission. 

Be firm about it but in a diplomatic way. I know you don't want to upset your boyfriend, but if he loves you he should support you on this.


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## CandyCanes (Jul 1, 2013)

If that happened to me, you would need to make sure that no sharp objects or weapons were in reach when I confronted that person. Act now, think later tends to be what I do. 
You need to confront this person, and really, subtly is not the way to go right now. It sounds like its been going on a while and as they have been told many times to STOP, they aren't likely to give a hoot if you simply say " pretty please stop riding my horse". I think now is the time to get a bit angry tbh. I would throw in a swear word or two, but that's just me. 
Please keep us updated.


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## SunnyDraco (Dec 8, 2011)

I would be concerned the girl did something intentionally to the horse after the text telling her she wasn't to ride again, especially as it was only after that happened did such a dramatic change occur in the horse's behavior. Might want to look into a new place to board at and make sure the girl doesn't know where it is. Good luck 

There are strange people out there, dangerous and manipulative when you turn your back. I know of one that as a teenager, was jealous of their neighbor's grey arabian mare. Even went into the horse pasture (neighbor's pasture, not their own) and started kicking the mare in the belly as hard as they could while the mare was heavy in foal because they wanted the foal to die... It just wasn't fair in her mind that the mare wasn't hers. And she had manipulated her parents to buy her a grey arabian mare and then was mad at the horse because it wasn't an exact copy of the neighbor's mare, had differences in which hooves were light and dark.... Yeah her gloating over her brand new horse ended right there, she didn't much like her new horse after that and her horse didn't like her in return.
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## LadyDreamer (Jan 25, 2008)

Being 17, chances are she might be acting out her hatred of you on the horse. It might harm your relationship with your BF, but the barn needs to be dropped on this little princess. Be extra nice to your BO too and the grooms. Have them text you the second she sets foot on the property. Go there immediately.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Midnite711 (May 30, 2014)

I agree with Lady Dreamer, you need to be told when she is going out there so that way you can also be there eliminating any chance for her to get on your horse. That would make me irate. She shouldn't be anywhere near your horse without permission. She's 17 that is old enough to understand that what is not hers should be left alone.


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## Saskia (Aug 26, 2009)

It's hard that it is now somewhat of a family matter. 

Make things crystal clear, tell the barn owner, other boarders and the girl that she is not allowed to ride your horse. Tell your boyfriend and his family what she has done, and how much this has upset you. Between everyone knowing, it should be enough to make her stop.


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