# ?Unteachable? Student?



## LillianaKM (Sep 27, 2017)

Hello everyone! I am not a trainer, I?m actually a student, but I have a kinda question kinda rant type thing. My trainer complains a lot about one of her students, who is a very close friend of mine, and how she cannot ride at all. My trainer said that she was able to get this student to the point where she can stay on the horse while walking and trotting, but that her position is terrible and she hasn?t improved in months. 

My question is - shouldn?t my trainer be fixing that? I realize some people can be hard to teach things, but it?s been about half a year since she?s improved any. Isn?t this a bad reflection on my trainer that she can?t teach this student anything past walking and trotting? 

As far as I?m aware the trainer hasn?t actually said anything to this student about her bad riding, and I?m pretty sure the student thinks she?s a good rider. 

Again, I am not a trainer so I don?t know how hard it is to teach someone to ride, but I just feel like it?s at least a little bit my trainers fault she?s not improving. She?s been riding for a pretty long time.


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## LillianaKM (Sep 27, 2017)

So apparently my mobile hates me or something because it turned half the punctuation into question marks - at least for me. I apologize for that, I don?t know why that happened.


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## Golden Horse (Feb 20, 2010)

My question to you is do you want to ride with a trainer who discusses one persons progress, or lack of it, with another student? That is not acceptable in my book, and throws up a red flag.

As to the actual question, some people seem to struggle to 'get it' there is a lady at our barn who I used to ride with, she is still stuck where she was last year, she either can't or won't address the issues that she needs to for her to progress. This is down to her, not my trainer, I have watched lessons, and I can see, as can everyone else that she is 'stuck' but she is not open to really working to change.


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## farmpony84 (Apr 21, 2008)

I don't like trainers that talk about their students. I had one that I loved for myself but she spent a lot of time badmouthing clients and it really bothered me. She's a great trainer and a terrific teacher but I had a hard time with the badmouthing - it's not professional.

As for the student, you kind of have to figure out where the problem is. Sometimes it's in the language. My kid has the most amazing batting coach on earth. This guy can break it down in a way that my kid just eats every word up. He takes it and uses it in his game. I had to go through a couple different pitching coaches with him. Not because they weren't knowledgeable or good instructors, just because I needed one that spoke Max. My kid has a special way about him! He just has this light switch that you have to find and know how to turn on. Once you find it - you can get amazing things out of him.

It's like that with riding too. I kept going to a trainer and could not for the life of me figure out how to do somethings. I switched to another trainer and she told me the exact same thing in a different way and I got it! It sunk in! I have been using a new trainer and he's done an awesome job getting through to me but the sliding stop was difficult. I mentioned it to a girl at work - she also rides. And she said... You just have to plop yourself down in the saddle. You know? Like you are just done for the day and you are taking a seat on the sofa. Plop your whole but down and sink in... I got it! Crazy that the wording makes such a huge difference.

Another problem could be in your friends effort. She may not want it that bad. equitation is hard. So is balance and seat and all that mess that go's with it. You get tired, you get sore. She may just be taking the easy rode and riding however it is most comfortable.

Or... she could just be one of those people that just are not athletic. She may be that person that tries as hard as she can and just never really gets it. The biggest thing is, if she's happy and having fun, then it doesn't really matter how good she ever gets...


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## horselovinguy (Oct 1, 2013)

Have you said anything to the instructor/person when she is bashing your friend?
You should....and then you be the adult and walk away...
Let that instructor stew on what you just confronted her with...

Me, I have been the bashed and also been present when someone did the bashing of another...neither is pleasant.
I also am outspoken enough when it was another being bashed to just say...
_"I'm not interested in hearing anymore. Done...no more!"_
I did walk out on her {instructor}...the mouth gaped open in surprise.
To my knowledge it was the last time she mouthed off about others...uncalled for and very unprofessional.
It was also my exit door opening....
I lost my respect for the person and no longer wanted to be affiliated with her barn or business.
Bye- Bye...

No idea of your age, but I was a young adult when this took place...if younger I would go to my parents and speak to them about this...let them handle this along with you.
Just don't lower yourself to listen or join in the bashing...take the high road and just leave.
:runninghorse2:....


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## gingerscout (Jan 18, 2012)

horselovinguy said:


> Me, I have been the bashed and also been present when someone did the bashing of another...neither is pleasant.
> 
> :runninghorse2:....


as have I and It seems to happen more than you think.. I have noticed a lot of bashing from people, and have been bashed myself quite often.. especially when I was a plus sized adult male beginner rider trying to learn anything from an English Barn. A problem where I lived before was my area.. it was not a real horsey type area and most lesson places either didn't come out ( for traveling ) or had nothing they could offer me, so I felt for the longest time I was unteachable.. and for the most part I am still self taught. I have had maybe 10 lessons in my life.. I had to buy a horse and watch a ton of youtube, and read a ton of books/ videos etc. But You or your friend shouldn't have to put up with that.. you are their customer and you are paying them for a service.. if they are that unprofessional I agree call them out and seek business elsewhere


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## Avna (Jul 11, 2015)

My teacher brags on her other students and tells me how hard they are working and how impressed she is with them. Makes me feel like, dang, I am not going to be outshone by some twenty something, I am just NOT. Work harder, train harder. Then I find out she is doing the same thing about me behind my back!


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