# Crit my website! Please.



## saint3meg3rlfc (May 16, 2009)

Just a few notes as I'm going through.

On your page about Savannah you mention you use her for your "pony parties" however you have a picture of her bucking on the lunge. I assume this is not normal behaviour, but it is a bit off putting for someone looking for a safe pony to ride. It would be a good idea to get pictures of her being ridden in a calm environment to show her skill. Also "dark" isn't really a colour

I think if you cleaned up the place it would show a more professional approach. Not having toys/farming equipment in the pictures will look better

When you mention riding lessons, you may want to mention experience you have with riding and teaching. Showing pictures of the riding facility would be a good step too


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## equestrian_rider465 (Aug 30, 2008)

The first thing that I noticed was the line at the top says:
Home to _meat_ goats, trail horses, hunter ponies, and so much more...

I think by "meat" you mean "meet". 
Go over all of your spelling with spell check, and just make sure everything is right. (capitols, punctuation, grammer ect.) This will make it look a lot more professional. :wink:


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## myhorsesonador (Jun 21, 2009)

equestrian_rider465 said:


> The first thing that I noticed was the line at the top says:
> Home to _meat_ goats, trail horses, hunter ponies, and so much more...
> 
> I think by "meat" you mean "meet".
> Go over all of your spelling with spell check, and just make sure everything is right. (capitols, punctuation, grammer ect.) This will make it look a lot more professional. :wink:


She spelled it right. Meat goats are the ones you eay not the ones you "meet" as in visit.


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## equestrian_rider465 (Aug 30, 2008)

myhorsesonador said:


> She spelled it right. Meat goats are the ones you eay not the ones you "meet" as in visit.


Ooh alright. I'm sorry, I didn't know! haha.


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## myhorsesonador (Jun 21, 2009)

equestrian_rider465 said:


> Ooh alright. I'm sorry, I didn't know! haha.


its ok.


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## ilyTango (Mar 7, 2010)

Overall, I think it's pretty good. I didn't find _too_ many spelling and grammar errors, but I would go over that again, just to edit everything. Also, in some cases you may want to reword some things to make it sound a bit more professional. I agree about the Savannah bucking picture thing-if she's being advertised as a safe child's mount, you probably don't want to be posting pictures of her bucking and being...well, unsafe. It looks good though. Good luck =)


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## ilovemyPhillip (Apr 4, 2009)

saint3meg3rlfc said:


> Just a few notes as I'm going through.
> 
> *On your page about Savannah you mention you use her for your "pony parties" however you have a picture of her bucking on the lunge. I assume this is not normal behaviour, but it is a bit off putting for someone looking for a safe pony to ride. It would be a good idea to get pictures of her being ridden in a calm environment to show her skill. Also "dark" isn't really a colour*
> 
> ...


Bold: I have more pictures of her, I'll change it asap. I know "dark" in't a color, but I've been told she's liver chestnut, buckskin (really? lol), bay, dark bay, but I think she's extremely a bleached out black. So I didn't know what to put. She's also lightly roaned.

Bllue: Could you show me what pictures they are? My farm isn't that big so everything doesn't have a place for itself.

Red: I will mention my experience, but maybe instead of my facilities (because they're kind of embarrassing..) I have a picture of me helping a kid?



ilyTango said:


> Overall, I think it's pretty good. I didn't find _too_ many spelling and grammar errors, but I would go over that again, just to edit everything. Also, in some cases you may want to reword some things to make it sound a bit more professional. I agree about the Savannah bucking picture thing-if she's being advertised as a safe child's mount, you probably don't want to be posting pictures of her bucking and being...well, unsafe. It looks good though. Good luck =)


Could you show me where? Sometimes I can't find them all.


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## Alwaysbehind (Jul 10, 2009)

ilovemyPhillip said:


> Bllue: Could you show me what pictures they are? My farm isn't that big so everything doesn't have a place for itself.


Having a small place means you have to even more so have a place for everything. If you are going to run a business out of a small place you need to be able to keep it neat and clean.

It is also better to not post a photo than to post a bad one. A photo that makes your horse look less than good will only turn people away.

The busy backgrounds on the photo pages needs to go. Very distracting. Not very professional.


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## ilyTango (Mar 7, 2010)

ilovemyPhillip said:


> Could you show me where? Sometimes I can't find them all.


All of the quotes from your site are normal, my responses/fixing things are in bold. The direct changes are underlined...so bear with me, I'm really picky about this stuff 

The Home Page
He is currently up for stud, more information can be seen here.
*He is currently up for stud (, and OR ;) more information can be seen here.
*
We will start officially breeding our Boers this fall, so be looking for early Spring kids!
*" ", so be looking for early spring kids.*

We should also have farm fresh eggs in the fall, look on the For Sale page for further information.
*" " in the fall; look on the " ".

*The Contact Us Page
-when you say "Our little hobby farm is home to many animals" and then go on and list them (Dogs, Cats, Goats, Horses, Poultry), don't capitalize these words. (The same goes for the next sentence.)

Amanda, and Laura & Wayne Usher manage the farm. 
*Amanda, Laura and Wayne Usher manage the farm.

*Amanda has been working hard on training LLF's two ponies, working to show at the end of this year, and summer of 2011.
*Amanda...ponies. We are working towards showing at the end of the year and in the summer of 2011.

*We began in August 2008, this is when the acreage was acquired, clearing the land ourselves has been quite a long, though worthy, process.
Maybe instead put: *We acquired the farm in August 2008, and clearing the land ourselves has been a long, though worthy, process.

*He is greatly missed, & always in our hearts. May 8th, we acquired our first doe.
*He is greatly missed and will always be in our hearts. On May 8th....

*The Horses Page
ZEPH: 
...he is able compensate to well in whatever environment he is placed in.
*" " compensate well " "


*The Goats Page
Conformation, temperament, and blood important,
*" " and blood are important...
*
That''s all I could find for now (sorry my computer was going whack with the different fonts). I apologize for the excessive corrections, but...well, anyways, there you are.


*

*


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## saint3meg3rlfc (May 16, 2009)

There was just a few pictures where I got distracted by things in the background
http://i34.tinypic.com/kbymh.png

Is this your farm? I found it in the recent photos section.
-Laural Lake Farm- Home to meat goats, trail horses, hunter ponies, and so much more...

If so it'd be a great one to use

This is a good picture to show your pony parties. Girl with helmet being led.
Pony-Parties - -Laural Lake Farm- Home to meat goats, trail horses, hunter ponies, and so much more...
It shows off Savannah a lot better


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## anrz (Dec 21, 2008)

(the quotes are directly from your site)
"Laural Lake is a 10.5 acre property, just over the line of Caroline County, and Spotsylvania County."
lnstead of using so many commas, you may want to take all of those out. (Laural Lake is a 10.5 acre property just over the line of Caroline County and Spotsylvania County.)

On your albums page, you spelled 'storm' wrong in "After the Storm".

"Amanda, and Laura & Wayne Usher manage the farm."
l'm assuming that you all share the same last name because you have no last name listed for Amanda and Laura, so instead you could write: "Amanda, Laura, and Wayne Usher manage the farm."

"We spend our days grooming, feeding, and training our horses & goats, visitors are welcome!"
Maybe use 'and' instead of '&'. Also, these two sentences don't really go together. Maybe you could write, "We spend our days grooming, feeding, and training our horses and goats. Visitors are always welcome!" You may also want to request that people call ahead before visiting so you are sure someone will be able to answer any questions they may have and/or give them a tour of your facilities.

(On Zeph's page)
"Although he is blind in his right eye, and has clouding in his left, he is able compensate to well in whatever environment he is placed in."
lnstead of overusing commas, you could just say, "Although Zeph is blind in his right eye and has clouding in his left, he is able to compensate well in any environment he is placed in."

"For more photos' of Zeph, please click here."
The apostrophe is not necessary after the word photos.


lf you're sure that you are qualified to give lessons and teach people well, l would put a section on your experience, in what disciplines you have experience, how old you are, your last name, not just Amanda, any showing experience you may have, how long you have been riding, etc.

You also may want to take the blog out. lf you want to keep it, that's fine, but l would save that kind of stuff for somewhere else. lf you DO keep it, l would stop using terms such as 'LOL' if you want to give a professional impression. Just a thought!

lt seems like you've really got a good start on this. Good luck!


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## dressagexlee (Dec 15, 2009)

Out of curiosity, have you ever considered learning HTML? It's easy to learn the basics, and you can ask somebody to do an initial web design and set everything up for you so that you can then maintain and run it yourself. I actually do a lot of web design in DIV Layers (IFrames, et cetera), HTML, and CSS myself, and I'd be more than glad to help you with anything!

Also, maybe take a look at other websites and get an idea on how to better set up a page, place photos and graphics, and deliver content in a more organized and streamlined way! These are some good examples:
Tullstorp Dressage Stable - Startpage
KestrelRidgeFarm.com :: Boarding and training facility in Alberta, Canada


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## ilovemyPhillip (Apr 4, 2009)

saint3meg3rlfc said:


> There was just a few pictures where I got distracted by things in the background
> http://i34.tinypic.com/kbymh.png
> 
> Is this your farm? I found it in the recent photos section.
> ...


No that is not my farm, lol. That's Woodpecker, a place I ride at.


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## ilovemyPhillip (Apr 4, 2009)

anrz said:


> (the quotes are directly from your site)
> "Laural Lake is a 10.5 acre property, just over the line of Caroline County, and Spotsylvania County."
> lnstead of using so many commas, you may want to take all of those out. (Laural Lake is a 10.5 acre property just over the line of Caroline County and Spotsylvania County.)
> 
> ...


Thank you this was very helpful.
I'm a minor, and I do not wish to let the whole world know my last name. My dad would throw a fit if he found out I used "Usher". My mother is remarried.
I may take out the blog.


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## ilovemyPhillip (Apr 4, 2009)

dressagexlee said:


> Out of curiosity, have you ever considered learning HTML? It's easy to learn the basics, and you can ask somebody to do an initial web design and set everything up for you so that you can then maintain and run it yourself. I actually do a lot of web design in DIV Layers (IFrames, et cetera), HTML, and CSS myself, and I'd be more than glad to help you with anything!
> 
> Also, maybe take a look at other websites and get an idea on how to better set up a page, place photos and graphics, and deliver content in a more organized and streamlined way! These are some good examples:
> Tullstorp Dressage Stable - Startpage
> KestrelRidgeFarm.com :: Boarding and training facility in Alberta, Canada


Thank you! But no at the moment it seems to complicated for me! lol, I'm struggling with things the way the are now.


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## reachthestars (Jul 2, 2010)

ilovemyPhillip said:


> Red: I will mention my experience, but maybe instead of my facilities (because they're kind of embarrassing..) I have a picture of me helping a kid?


If you facilities are 'kind of embarrassing', where exactly are you planning on 'teaching' your lessons? Are you currently taking any lessons? What is your show experience?


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## ilovemyPhillip (Apr 4, 2009)

Why do you insist on pursuing me? I don't show, I have no time. But I worked under Beth Linton, a well known trainer in the hunter community around here, for 5 months. I've been riding for about 5 years. I've helped break 6 ponies, and trained 3. I've taught beginners, and I would classify myself as a high intermediate rider. I only want to teach beginners, nothing more. I've taught 2 people how to w/t/c on my property.. I also worked teaching special needs children to "ride" (more like therapy on a pony..). After I feel the kids need to move on, I'd pass the on to Beth, more business for her.


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## reachthestars (Jul 2, 2010)

Pursuing you is asking you to answer simple questions? I just want to know what your facilities are. Anyone who is planning to teach anyone, especially beginners, should be able to answer that. 

I thought your goal was to buy a new horse to show?


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## ilovemyPhillip (Apr 4, 2009)

That is my goal. For the next 2-3 years. Message me, I don't need to tell all my business on 3 different threads.


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## reachthestars (Jul 2, 2010)

Still didn't answer my question about your facilities...


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## ilovemyPhillip (Apr 4, 2009)

-.-" people like you need to stop. You have no idea what's going on.


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## reachthestars (Jul 2, 2010)

So enlighten me, because all I can see is what YOU'VE told us.


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## ilovemyPhillip (Apr 4, 2009)

Okay. I will, since you couldn't just drop it.
I'm trying to lease my pony because I'm no longer able to pay for all my animals. I want him to go somewhere, where he would have more attention payed to him. I have divorced parents, & I can't get out to see him every day. He needs to live in a place where he's shown, or I'd feel like I'm wasting him. I have no way of transporting him to shows (I can't drive, no one will trailer him), no show tack, I can't afford continious lessons. I have a hard time, my parents bit off more then they could chew when we got 4 horses on our little rinky dink property. I've rebroken him, gotten him calm, taught him ground manners, etc. I also have another "problem pony" I have to work with. It's hard, I have no ring (in the process of being built), and have to make do with the things I'm provided with.

The one & only thing I can do is ride. Everyone sees it. I feel like I could teach people the basics once I have my ring this spring.


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## myhorsesonador (Jun 21, 2009)

Just so you know it is illegal to train people with out a licence or proper insurance. Just some thing to think about.


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## reachthestars (Jul 2, 2010)

Thank you for an honest answer, and not avoiding what is obviously a sore topic for you. It sucks when you get in over your head (or your parents, in this case), but keep in mind that no horse NEEDS to be shown or it is 'wasted'. Even a 50k imported warmblood is happy being a backyard horse for awhile if given a chance. It's obvious you love your pony and want to do right by him, so don't feel like he'd be better with anyone else. 

I know you want to rush out and teach people, but sometimes when you're young it really isn't the best idea without constant guidance. Is there anyway you can have your coach mentor you on her property, using her facilities and horses? That way you would be under her insurance (which is something you NEED to have if you are running a riding school, no matter the size, out of your own barn)?


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## ilovemyPhillip (Apr 4, 2009)

Nope, lol. I've hosted trail rides on my farm, everyone signs a liability wavier. I wouldn't have a big "school". Two or three students? 

You saw my pictures, I have a dirt pasture. I hate seeing my beautiful baby in it when it's mud & muck. He deserves better.


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## reachthestars (Jul 2, 2010)

You NEED insurance if you are running a business. If one of your students (clients) comes off and gets hurt, you can be sued. Well, your parents can be. You could lose everything over $15. Liability waivers aren't worth the paper they're printed on if you don't have the insurance to back it up. 

I board my horse at a gorgeous barn - guess what? She's spent most of this fall in mud and muck, that comes with owning horses. You can't turn them out on grass when it's wet, they'll turn that into muck quick.


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## kmacdougall (Feb 12, 2010)

reachthestars said:


> You NEED insurance if you are running a business. If one of your students (clients) comes off and gets hurt, you can be sued. Well, your parents can be. You could lose everything over $15. Liability waivers aren\'t worth the paper they\'re printed on if you don\'t have the insurance to back it up.


Very much true. Plus, if you are teaching young kids, most parents with a brain are going to ask to see proof of insurance..


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## vivache (Jun 14, 2009)

If a student gets hurt because of your negligence(and trust me, they'll try to twist it that way), the liability waiver is useless, and you'll be paying for their medical expenses.


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## VelvetsAB (Aug 11, 2010)

myhorsesonador said:


> Just so you know it is illegal to train people with out a licence or proper insurance. Just some thing to think about.


_Do you have the law where it says that it is illegal to coach without a license? I am sure lots of coaches dont have a license to teach. I dont think either of my coaches have certification of any kind. The coach I had in high school definately didnt have any certification....she only had one horse, and only had 3 to 5 students._

_A few Advanced students at my barn do not have any certification, but they teach beginner classes, and are competant enough to do so._


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## ErikaLynn (Aug 3, 2010)

VelvetsAB said:


> _Do you have the law where it says that it is illegal to coach without a license? I am sure lots of coaches dont have a license to teach. I dont think either of my coaches have certification of any kind. The coach I had in high school definately didnt have any certification....she only had one horse, and only had 3 to 5 students._
> 
> _A few Advanced students at my barn do not have any certification, but they teach beginner classes, and are competant enough to do so._



I didn't think it was illegal to train without a license or insurance. (I'm not sure though) But you should really have insurance...you can get the pants sued right off of you. 

About the website...It's not consistent. For instance on the contact page you use two different style fonts. I also think the colors are too dark and it's kind of gloomy looking. Maybe put some nice borders on the pictures...try and spruce it up a little. Also I think you should change the red font on the goats page to a different color. Usually red signals danger...plus there is no other red on the website anywhere.


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## sarahver (Apr 9, 2010)

Good job, overall the useability is good and the information is sufficient. I love the picture of your horse with the dog sitting on him, so cute! Just a couple of points for you:

General:

Homepage: I would make the 'Laural Lake Farm' title bigger and clearer so that it is the focal point of the home page. Right now it looks like a caption without a heading.

Agreed with ErikaLynn that the colours are a bit dark. You are setting the mood here with your website, be sure that it is the mood you WANT to set!! The grey is great but there is too much of it, perhaps adding in some blue or green to add some life to the site?

Specific:
1.) On the "Homepage" you have a sentence that reads "Our Boer goat bloodlines include of the following..." Re-word this so it makes more sense, do you mean "Our Boer goat bloodlines include some of the following...?"

2.) On the "Contact Us" page you have a sentence that reads "We acquired the farm in August 2008, and clearing the land ourselves has been quite a long, though worthy, process" Awkward to read and a little gloomy, consider re-wording. Perhaps "After acquiring the farm in August 2008 we commenced the arduous task of clearing the land and are proud to see the results of our hard work today..." Or something similar that is more upbeat.

3.) On the "Helpful Links" page under Dixieland Acres - you have 'we bough Dee...' Add a 't' so it reads we 'bought'

4.) On the "Horses" page, be consistent with full stops after the horse descriptions. 
2001 dapple palomino Quarter Horse gelding. 
1986 palomino Quarter Horse gelding
2000 palomino Arabian gelding
1998 fading black Icelandic mare. 

5.) On the "Pony parties" page, you have a sentence that reads: "Since Laural Lake has veratile horses" Change to "versatile".

6.) On the "Goats" page:
"Conformation, temperament, and blood important" Re word.
"* and how well the place in shows" Add a "y"*
*"*Sweet feed and a pellet mix is what I use (Purina Goat Chow x Purina Noble Goat)" Change from first person to third person to maintain consistency.

7.) On the "Poultry" page: "we get quite a few eggs per day" This sounds very unspecific! Surely you must have an approximate number you could put in! Something to make this statement more exciting like "with over 30 hens we have up to 100 eggs per day!" Or 50, or 30 or whatever, a number sounds more professional than "quite a few".

Also: " These four are just pets, and we are hoping to have geese eggs some time!" Take the comma out or take the "and" out. Either "These four are just pets and we are hoping..." Or "These four are just pets, we are hoping..."

8.) On the "For Sale" page you have a sentence that reads "Deposits are good for 30 days" Reword - unprofessional. Perhaps "Deposits are valid for 30 days"

Final sentence reads: "And don't forget to contact Amanda for unprovided information, or set-up dates" Awkward sounding, try not to start sentences with "and"!! Perhaps "For additional information or to organize a viewing, please don't hesitate to contact Amanda..."

Sorry about all the different fonts, you can tell I was copying and pasting from your website hey? 

Good luck with your endeavours!


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## kmacdougall (Feb 12, 2010)

ErikaLynn said:


> I didn\'t think it was illegal to train without a license or insurance. (I\'m not sure though)


I dont think so either but the law may differ from state to state. You should check first because its easier to check then it is to get out of breaking the law.


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## apachiedragon (Apr 19, 2008)

As far as teaching goes, you can get yourself into quite a bit of trouble if you don't have insurance, like others have said, liability release or not. You also MUST HAVE a sign posted in view of all visitors with the horse activity liability statute for your state printed on it if you expect it to be upheld. They can claim ignorance otherwise. 

In regards to your facility, you will not be able to get or keep students without a clean, safe, and professional facility. Just teaching in your back yard, or in a thrown-together ring with all manner of clutter sitting around will not work. I promise that they will find another farm, that has a better appearance, for the same, or close to the same amount of money. These are all things you will have to think about before you are ready to teach. I would recommend working at a barn under another trainer, maybe teaching a couple beginner lessons a week to free up their time, and learn how to teach while you do it. Just because you can DO it, does not mean you can TEACH it. This is why there is a training program in place for certification. To teach you how to be an effective teacher.

In regards to the website, it isn't a bad start at all. It can be tweaked as you go. Every few days, glance at it again and see what you think you want to change. It took me almost a full year to get mine how I wanted it, and then I still went back and adjusted every once in a while. I'd be happy to post a link if you want to see it, but since I have been having issues with my provider, I haven't been able to edit it in a few months. 

One thing I did notice though, was on your Bucks page. At the bottom it reads
"Email me at Amanda for more information, comments, questions, or set-up-dates." It should read "Email Amanda at {your email addy} for more information...{etc}"


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