# why can't they shut up?



## Janna (Apr 19, 2012)

I just got home from visiting my Grandma. 
I want to go back already. I can't stand my sister and her kids. 
I want to go kick them all in the face. 
They're almost always yelling, or doing something noisy. 
it's non stop talking. 

Noisiest people I know. I hate loudness. 

I think they might have some sort of medical problem that causes them to be unable to sit down and shut up  


I'm a calm, quiet, sit and read or listen to some music person. 
I don't know how they do it ! 

Really this was a kind of rant
I can't even go to sleep because of them, so loud and I'm in my own room. 
Gah.


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## themacpack (Jul 16, 2009)

Are you living with them or they with you?


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## Janna (Apr 19, 2012)

She's a 25 yr old still attached to moms tit. 

we both live with mom. 
Only I'm actually working on leaving. 

& my sister and her kids are my motivation.


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## kitten_Val (Apr 25, 2007)

May be you should of move out long time ago if you hate it there so much....


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## Janna (Apr 19, 2012)

Maybe you should know the reasons haven't first  
Not really anyones business though  
Point is, I'm working on it. 
Least I'm not a 25 yr old bum.


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## LadyDreamer (Jan 25, 2008)

What kills me with my brothers kids and makes me want to stomp them into the ground is the phrase "I know." When you are trying to teach them something they DON'T know, it is their default response. Why can't they just say "Okay" like normal, respectful kids. It drives me nuts!

My sisters kids rock. The oldest was born when I was 12. He is my best buddy in the world. He is like the perfect little brother. The youngest one gets on my nerves but is a wonderful smart kid. He just gets really excited and talks nonstop. Lol.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## DancingArabian (Jul 15, 2011)

Buy the headphones that reduce outside noise.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

Janna said:


> Maybe you should know the reasons haven't first
> Not really anyones business though


You _made_ it our business by posting it on a public board. 

Pretty obvious you hate your sister, and that hatred is also transferring to her children.

It's your_ mother's_ house; whoever lives there is up to her.

Good that you're making plans to get out, because with all that hatred and discontent you're radiating it can't be any picnic for them to live with you either.


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## Cacowgirl (Feb 19, 2011)

It's said social connections keep us healthy-but so many of us sound like being alone is better-LOL.


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## texasgal (Jul 25, 2008)

Speed Racer said:


> You _made_ it our business by posting it on a public board.
> .


No she didn't .. what she made our business is that she is unhappy with the noise.. and her sister and her kid ...

Why do people then assume that every other intimate detail of someone's life is then our business???

OP .. I'm sorry. I agree with buying good headphones.. lol .. and keep working on getting out of there! There's nothing like having your own place and making your own rules ..

Good luck!


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

texasgal said:


> No she didn't .. what she made our business is that she is unhappy with the noise.. and her sister and her kid ...


And that her sister is a lazy asshat, and she hates her and her kids. Did you not read the same post I did?

She just oozes scorn for her sister and yet she's still living at home with Mom, too. In fact, she stated her only _real_ motivation for leaving was because she can't stand her sister and the kids. I guess if they didn't live there she'd be happy to stay and 'be attached to mom's tit' indefinitely herself.

I didn't WANT to know her personal problems, and yet she brought them to the board. Doesn't she have any _real_ life friends to talk to?

Whatever happened to keeping private family things PRIVATE? When did society turn into the Jerry Springer Show?


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## mls (Nov 28, 2006)

Speed Racer said:


> Whatever happened to keeping private family things PRIVATE? When did society turn into the Jerry Springer Show?


I have often wondered that myself!


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## Janna (Apr 19, 2012)

Aw no id be trying to leave either way but they are just such good motivation. 
Because I am venting and said my sister and her kids are annoying did not mean I have to tell you my whole life story and everything. 

- and wow. My family moves so much, so often. and I've only been,homeschooled, no I don't have many friends, problem?


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## hisangelonly (Oct 29, 2011)

Two families under one roof can cause problems. Because they start getting on each others nerves. Doesn't mean you hate them. They're just annoying. Lol. When you're on your own you'll be much Better off. You and your sister sound like opposites. Just work hard and make an example. Maybe play soothing music while trying to sleep? Or like others said earplugs or headphones can help although sometimes they're uncomfy. I just became a deep sleeper haha. I don't believe you hate them. I believe your tired and taking your frustrations out on here rather than on them. And like you said you don't have many friends. You just needed somewhere to vent. Maybe keep a "locked" diary? Journal? Write your vents down. . You may feel more relaxed.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Janna (Apr 19, 2012)

Well I hate kids. Hate isn't even a good enough word actually. 
And I've tried the headphones and stuff, but I seriously have to have a quiet place to get to sleep. 
but when they are screaming and yelling by my door, im tempted to get up and punch someone in the face. 


Really I was just venting 

*is working on leaving


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## hisangelonly (Oct 29, 2011)

Well they're still your family. I am not a big fan of kids either. Just be thankful you have none lol. I don't. But I tolerate my family that has little kids. Maybe you can talk to your sis and ask her that the kids stay in the living room or their/her room when youre trying to sleep. Explain to her you need to be able to get sleep. Be polite. Maybe she will agree. Communication is key. If she doesn't listen then maybe, I mean I know your sister is an adult and it's her kids, but maybe you could go to your mom and explain. Your sister may listen to her better than she does you. I don't see why the kids have to be by your door. If they're small enough you could get a baby gate and put it somewhere where they can't be by your door.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MangoRoX87 (Oct 19, 2009)

Speedracer...sit down before you fall down.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## nikelodeon79 (Mar 3, 2008)

This thread is just.. wow.

1) Janna, if you're finding it difficult to find the means to move and it's just you, imagine your sister trying to find the means to leave when she has children to think of (extra financial responsibilities, need for daycare, etc.). It's just vulgar and rude to say she's "attached to your mother's tit." Additionally, as has been pointed out, YOU are still at home so aren't you saying the same thing about yourself?

2) Perhaps the children DO have some medical reason they cannot sit and be quiet. Or perhaps they are just normal children. Regardless, until you have the means to support yourself, you're living under your mother's roof and your sister and her kids have just as much right to be there as you do. I'm sure there are things about you that annoy them. Seething anger and bitterness, perhaps.


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## DancingArabian (Jul 15, 2011)

I think the situation sucks all around. The OP's quiet life is disrupted by someone else's kids and she can't pick up and move right now. The sister in question having to live in someone else's house, probably some bad decisions leading her there, with her kids and probably no way to get out on her own. People know when their kids are loud and obnoxious. I bet the mom is both happy and sad about it all too. Sounds suck all around!

OP if you're not of age where you can save up and live alone perhaps another relative will let you move in if you help out with some costs via a job.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Faceman (Nov 29, 2007)

nikelodeon79 said:


> This thread is just.. wow.
> 
> 1) Janna, if you're finding it difficult to find the means to move and it's just you, imagine your sister trying to find the means to leave when she has children to think of (extra financial responsibilities, need for daycare, etc.). It's just vulgar and rude to say she's "attached to your mother's tit." Additionally, as has been pointed out, YOU are still at home so aren't you saying the same thing about yourself?
> 
> 2) Perhaps the children DO have some medical reason they cannot sit and be quiet. Or perhaps they are just normal children. Regardless, until you have the means to support yourself, you're living under your mother's roof and your sister and her kids have just as much right to be there as you do. I'm sure there are things about you that annoy them. Seething anger and bitterness, perhaps.


I think this...



> Well I hate kids. Hate isn't even a good enough word actually...


...pretty much identifies the actual source of the problem...


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## Roperchick (Feb 1, 2010)

OP while i feel for you, and the situation you are in...i think maybe this isnt the right way to vent or express your frustration.

I know how hard it can be being crammed into a house with small children and not enough space. lots of noise and lots of chaos.
heck i have a hard time just going home at christmas to see my family. dont get me wrong i love them all but...i was out of the house on my 18th b-day on my way to boot camp....and after 2 1/2 years in the military with discipline etc going back to screaming children and family fueds is NEVER easy.


but if theres a problem at home....deal with it at home. coming on to a public forum and throwing insults about your sister and your other family members is NOT the best way to go about it.

we obviously dont know whats going on at home. we arent entitled to it but if you come on here insulting right of the bat...we are going to form opinions based on jsut waht youve given us and we cant be blamed if we dont know the full story.


its probably not easy for your sister having kids to take care of. especially in this economy and maybe she needs some extra help.


the best thing for you to do is talk to her about it. tell her wahts going on with the kids and how its stressing you out. maybe see if you can move in with a friend or another family member while you try to build up some money to move out on your own.


but coming on here, and gossiping/insulting your family is not constuctive to helping solve this situation.


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## Janna (Apr 19, 2012)

She doesn't take care of them. Lol ! My mom does .


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## ChipsAhoy (Jul 1, 2012)

It's understandable that you're quite frustrated, but bashing your family on here isn't the answer. If you already hate children with a passion and aren't going to budge on that opinion... the kids aren't the problem.

I can't stand loud noise and am not a huge fan of being around young children, so I do get where you're coming from, but I think you need to re consider the situation rather than blaming others. Maybe if you were to help your mother with the kids rather than bitterly trying to tune them out you'd find something positive about them? She's the one thats kindly allowing them to live in her house and taking care of them after all.


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## themacpack (Jul 16, 2009)

Janna said:


> She doesn't take care of them. Lol ! My mom does .


That is your mother's call - if SHE has a problem with any of this (including your attitude) she is the one that has the right/power to do or say something about it, because it is HER house that you are all in. Again, if you are so unhappy about your living situation, you are free to remove yourself from it. Life is full of choices and choices have consequences. The consequence of choosing to live in your mother's house is that you are going to be living with anyone else she also allows that same privilege.


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## dbarabians (May 21, 2011)

Anger derives from fear. 
I can understand your home life is not what you would like but it is beyond your control. If you cannot leave then while you are saving up to do so focus on releasing that frustration you have allowed to build up.
Hate and anger are negative emotions that require too much energy to maintain. energy that you can focus elsewhere and use to improve you life.
frustration is one thing hate is another.
You have a right to be angry with the sister and her children you do not have a right to make them uncomfortable or place the blame for your anger on them. that rest solely with you. by allowing yourself to be manipulated by elements outside your control you are allowing your sister and her children unnecessary control over YOUR emotions and mental well being.
Good luck and hopefully you can move soon.
Get out and meet some friends. a life outside the home is improtant for a well rounded person. Shalom


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## Samstead (Dec 13, 2011)

Janna said:


> She doesn't take care of them. Lol ! My mom does .


Hmm sounds like my friends Dad only he's thirty something has a freaking breathalyzer installed in his car that he has to pass to start the heap of junk and completely ignores the existence of his daughter honestly MY parents have been better parents to her then her actual parents! Ugghh! People!....not that I'm bitter....


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## Janna (Apr 19, 2012)

Samstead said:


> Hmm sounds like my friends Dad only he's thirty something has a freaking breathalyzer installed in his car that he has to pass to start the heap of junk and completely ignores the existence of his daughter honestly MY parents have been better parents to her then her actual parents! Ugghh! People!....not that I'm bitter....


Lol yes. 
my sister dumps them off on my mom. 
She'd rather be with a boyfriend. 

just Pops out kids like she don't know how it happens.


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## boots (Jan 16, 2012)

Janna said:


> Lol yes.
> my sister dumps them off on my mom.
> She'd rather be with a boyfriend.
> 
> just Pops out kids like she don't know how it happens.


First, your words and attitude really angered me. But, from what little I know, I can see you are in a rotten situation. Doesn't really excuse the language, but does explain it a bit. 

From the quoted text, I can imagine being frustrated and even embarassed by the whole place.

The facts are that you want to get out, and somehow are working to get out. That the life at your mom's house is less than peaceful and doesn't sound, well, conducive to your success.

I can tell you that "the best revenge is a life well lived." Make, try to make, contact with better people. Through church? Work? Horses? Neighbors? The tough thing is that you don't have a place to vent and strangers may pull back from you if you share too much of what life at home is like, or if it shows too much on your face. You may kind of have to fake it in work and social situations.

But, as bad as things are at your house, you know there are worse places. And, you have to know that people have overcome worse and left it behind.

Read biographies of people who have overcome much. Your librarians can help find those. 

Finally, take what you need while you have to be at home. You need a roof and food? Be grateful that you can get that. But never lose sight of your dream and goals. I used to have a small piece of paper on my wall that only said, "Keep your eyes on the prize." Don't know how much time I stared at that with silent tears running down my face. But, I've been living the prize for years now and am glad I stuck with it.


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## Maple (Jan 10, 2012)

You have some amount of anger built up inside you! I don't know anything about you or how old you are but you need to talk to somebody about how you feel. I get the impression you feel trapped in your circumstances. 

1. This is your mothers house. There is nothing to jack squat you can do about the conditions. Don't like it? Either tough it out or move out. I didn't get on well with my family; at 17 I found a job on a warmblood stud, moved to the staff accomadation and went to school online in the evenings while working during the day. 

2. I once thought i hated kids, now I have two. I don't have much patience for other children (heck sometimes the patience for my own is limited) but these are your family, try and be the aunt that in time they want to know. I can tell you first hand that sometimes my kids are a serious test of patience, and heaven knows if I tell them to go Left, 90% of the time they will go right.. but it's a learning curve for all of us. It isn't the fault of the kids they are in the situation they are, so try not to take your frustration out on them. 

3. IMO you are very very defensive in all of your replies. Why try and pick a squabble over such minor comments? Maybe you should have a look at the way in which you are coming across to us. I'm by no means a saint, but the "stuck to moms tit" comment really made me say whoa! In the grand scheme of things, if you come across like this to future possible employers/ect it may not work in your favour. Sorry if I am insulting you :/


Life does not have a remote control, if you want to change it get up off your backside and do it yourself.


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## Janna (Apr 19, 2012)

I probably should get a video of a day here. 
phone will only do so much though.


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## dbarabians (May 21, 2011)

Janna you are concentrating on the negatives of your life.
As another member has posted you have a lot of internal anger built up and that IS NOT healthy.
Your post sound hopeless and bitter. Very depressed.
As a therapist just from reading your post i see some very alarming signs. i might be wrong but if I were you I would difuse this anger now.
If not when you do move out the anger will follow you and then who will you be angry at but yourself?
Once again get out meet some friends, get a hobby, Relax and smile.
Life is full of happiness you do have to find though it won't fine you. Shalom


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