# I'm becoming frustrated with my progress in riding



## beverleyy (Oct 26, 2011)

You state that the "nicer" horses are more "well behaved". That's probably exactly why you are no longer on them. I obviously do not know your instructor or your exact abilities as a rider, but I'd be willing to bet that's why if they more fit/nicer horses are more well behaved. Your skills are advancing, and with that I would suspect your instructor is moving you on to horses that are maybe not as well behaved to teach you skills in the saddle other than "sit here, do this, do that". If you ride the "easy" horses you won't get the experience or advance your skill. The horses that are older and been there-done that can have a TON to teach you.

If that truly is the case, then I'd take it as a compliment vs. an offense.


----------



## 136210 (Jul 27, 2014)

I think that at least a few of the other horses that she won't have me ride any more are the ones that can be tricky to control, while the ones that are older and tend to misbehave are a little easier to control. It's just strange. I wish she would tell me what's going on, but I'm afraid to ask her what the deal is because I don't want to come across as rude.

It's almost like she's moved me from easy horses, to more difficult horses, then back to the easier horses again =/


----------



## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

I doubt it's as personal a decision as it feels to you. if this is a group class, she has to juggle the whole what student to which horse thing, and you are not the only one with needs there. if you are capapble, more capable , than the others of dealing with difficulties, it frees up the few horses that can carry any rider. those horses are more needed for the riders who are NOT adaptable.

if you really want to progess, you must go for private lessons now.


----------



## TXhorseman (May 29, 2014)

It is hard to know why your instructor is making the choices she is making on what horses you or others ride. Some possibilities have been provided.

It would not be rude to ask your instructor to explain her reasoning, especially in regard to the horses she chose for you to ride. Just don't do it in an accusatory manor as if she were insulting you in making her choices. Ask in way that expresses your desire to learn and understand why the choices are made so you might make the most of them.

You might be pleasantly surprised by the instructor's answer. On the other hand, your inquiry might lead your instructor to make other choices. Lack of communication leads to guessing and, often, leads to misconceptions. Dialogue provides the opportunity for better understanding and interaction.


----------



## Maple (Jan 10, 2012)

Amanda10990 said:


> don't understand why she has changed. During my last lesson, I was a bit embarrassed because she had me ride a *very small pony* that was pretty old (I could barely get him to go!) while the rest of my class, including a new person got to ride the horses that were more fit, and well behaved.
> There was one really great horse that she had me ride for a lesson, but then she told another instructor that he was "too quick" for me. I don't understand what I am doing wrong. I think my question is, what do I need to do to be able to get back up on some of the, for a lack of a better word, nicer horses.
> I am belo*w 5ft tall and I barely weigh anything above 100 lbs.* Sometimes I wonder if my instructor is judging my capabilities by my size. Could this be true? Or, does this have to do with physical fitness. Do I need to become stronger and more fit myself to be able to ride the larger horses? Does this mean that I am just terrible at riding and she doesn't think I'm good enough to handle the other horses? Lately, I've been thinking about quitting my lessons, but I'm not sure what to do.


Welcome to the world of the petite rider. We are often used to get on cheeky ponies to give them simple reminders that young children are unable to do. Even DD's 25yo pony needed an older rider to hop on last year - she figured out a trick worked on DD, and became a master of it in 2 seconds. Bigger, more able rider rode for 5 min and she has been grand since. 

Part of becoming a rider is learning how to deal with different horses and their different speeds, quirks, abilities. I would think that your instructor feels that you are able to deal with those who aren't as straight forward and in doing so is making you have to change what you are doing and think outside the box. Take it as a compliment and don't be afraid to "hey miss, Snowy seems to be really lazy, what can i change to make this better".


----------



## VestorDunIt (Dec 22, 2014)

My trainer does this thing with all of her students! First she puts beginners on the easy pack around ponies until we master that and then we ride the harder and "nicer" horses. They teach a rider how to be light and quiet and show a rider all the cool buttons. After we have been doing that she puts us back on the easy horses and sees if we can have the same softness and balance with beginner horses that we have learned from the advanced horses. You should be proud with your progress!


----------



## Roanwatch (Apr 1, 2014)

She may just be trying to give you experience on how to handle different horse personalities, capabilities, and attitudes. Why not just ask her?


----------



## winterwhite (Jul 5, 2014)

well, I'm petite - 5'1" and 120lbs. 

there will be horses in life that you are simply not a good match for. You will not be physically large enough to get them to even notice you're up there no matter what kind of rider you are. 

You can always ask your instructor but it might just be the makeup of the group. If three riders are 5'7" and you're 5', and there's 3 big horses and a pony - you'll always be the one riding the pony. You can ride a horse that's too big for you, but it's not fair to the pony to make someone who is too big, ride her.


----------



## palomino347 (Dec 28, 2014)

You described the other lesson horses as "well behaved". She is giving you the older, harder horses as more of a challenge. If you can barely get the horses to go, then it's working. It is more of a challenge and you will improve....


----------



## Bedhead (Aug 4, 2013)

Some good artist advice I saw applies here; the advice is, when you're not satisfied with your progress, it's because your eye has developed towards that next level and you recognize this, _but_ you're not quite where you need to be (yet) to make it how you want it (I.E., you know the pony is not doing what you want, know what you're supposed to look like/be doing, but you're having problems getting the pony to do so this century). That frustration is often the precursor to a really good break through that will leave you going "_A-ha!_". So I would not give up yet if I were you- Everyone, no matter what, eventually hits a wall where they think they're not progressing/not good enough/etc.

If you don't understand the how-and-why of what your trainer is doing, definitely _do not_ be afraid to talk to her and discuss what exactly she's having you work on, etc. You'll be surprised by what you learn about yourself tbh.

How confident are you in the saddle? The "too quick" comment kinda tips off to me that she might be trying to avoid a situation where you get in over your head, especially since you're still working on learning to sit the canter (not the end of the world, and while it's good to push your horizons you also want to do it in a safe matter. A floppy rider on a more refined horse may not be the best mix since they are not as tolerant of lesson kids moving around.).

I mean I really, really doubt she's deliberately giving you the short of the stick. There's probably some how or why to it, but you need to talk to her and make sure that you know what goal she's having you work towards, and trust her to make the right decisions to help you progress in your riding.

Like when my trainer put me on my horse, I was totally fine with it and asked her "Hey, just curious, but why did you put me on him?" (since that's a story in of itself, but you can kinda use that line to segue into talking to her about your progress, etc.)


----------



## MaximasMommy (Sep 21, 2013)

I think for awhile you were a new student and she had you on the popular new student horses. Then she got comfortable with you and she's putting you on the other horses and ponies. 

It could be something as simple as there aren't enough horses to go around and she's putting you on what she has because you've been there awhile and she is still trying to woo the new customers into staying. 

You sound petite enough to fit comfortably on a pony. Ponies aren't just for kids. They are bouncy, plucky, sassy, delightful creatures! I was thrilled when my instructor let me switch from the usual 16.2h lesson horse to a little appy pony. He was way more of a fun ride for me. I was limping for a week from his bounce, lol!


----------



## 136210 (Jul 27, 2014)

I really appreciate everyone's responses. Thank you all for taking the time to give me some input on the matter. 
Right now, I am just very confused as to what to do. I have since gotten a lot better at sitting the trot and the canter. My instructor recently moved me up to jumping lessons. I still mainly take group classes, and she has been making me ride a pony lately. The pony that she has had me on is pretty old and barely listens to my cues as opposed to the other horses I've ridden. She told me that this is because he is used to ignoring the cues given to him by all of the small children that ride him all of the time. I guess I'm not sure what to think at this point. I don't understand why I am stuck riding ponies, but on the other hand she has moved me up to taking jumping lessons because she said she thought I was good enough to start jumping. It feels like she doesn't think I'm good enough to ride an actual, athletic horse. I haven't spoken to her about the matter though, because I really don't want to come across as rude. But it bothers me that there are plenty of horses to ride, and I'm always the one in the lessons who has to ride a pony while everyone else is given horses. As far as confidence in my riding goes, I feel that I have learned a lot in the past year of taking lessons at this place, but my riding is far from being perfect. I definitely want to refine my riding and learn as many new skills as possible while taking lessons. Right now, I am thinking of taking lessons somewhere else where I can learn to ride horses or just quitting altogether. I'm starting to wonder if I'm just terrible at riding.


----------



## Textan49 (Feb 13, 2015)

Amanda10990 said:


> I really appreciate everyone's responses. Thank you all for taking the time to give me some input on the matter.
> Right now, I am just very confused as to what to do. I have since gotten a lot better at sitting the trot and the canter. My instructor recently moved me up to jumping lessons. I still mainly take group classes, and she has been making me ride a pony lately. The pony that she has had me on is pretty old and barely listens to my cues as opposed to the other horses I've ridden. She told me that this is because he is used to ignoring the cues given to him by all of the small children that ride him all of the time. I guess I'm not sure what to think at this point. I don't understand why I am stuck riding ponies, but on the other hand she has moved me up to taking jumping lessons because she said she thought I was good enough to start jumping. It feels like she doesn't think I'm good enough to ride an actual, athletic horse. I haven't spoken to her about the matter though, because I really don't want to come across as rude. But it bothers me that there are plenty of horses to ride, and I'm always the one in the lessons who has to ride a pony while everyone else is given horses. As far as confidence in my riding goes, I feel that I have learned a lot in the past year of taking lessons at this place, but my riding is far from being perfect. I definitely want to refine my riding and learn as many new skills as possible while taking lessons. Right now, I am thinking of taking lessons somewhere else where I can learn to ride horses or just quitting altogether. I'm starting to wonder if I'm just terrible at riding.


 I believe it is very important to have good communication and understanding between trainer and student. It would not be rude to express your concerns about your progress and potential. Your trainer probably has a very good reason for having you ride the horses that you do. When I was first cantering I was switched to a wonderful TB gelding for two lessons to perfect the canter because he was so smooth. I would have loved to have continued lessons on him but I didn't. I rode several horses at that school that I wasn't aware of learning anything on, but in reality they were teaching me a lot. It is normal to have the feelings that you have when your goal is to become a good rider but that seems a long way off. Make a point of having the best ride you possibly can regardless of the horse you're riding.


----------



## Bedhead (Aug 4, 2013)

Again, you need to talk to your trainer. "Not wanting to be rude" isn't getting you answers to your questions. 

Unless your trainer is very petite, she and all the other girls who are advanced riders are probably too big to be getting on the pony, so she's refining you so that you can work your legs more and work the pony. That's a good thing, it means you're advancing and good enough to be tuning up the ponies. That's probably why she has you on him all the time. As previously mentioned, such is the woes of the petite rider. 

I don't see how it's fair to either you or your trainer to decide if you're going to leave or quit before actually talking to her. You need to talk to your trainer and stop worrying about it being a slight against you that she doesn't put you on "the more athethletic" horses. She's got her reasons but you're not going to know until you have an actual conversation with her. If you're THAT worried about coming off as rude, then pratice how you want to word it.


----------



## EpicApple (Oct 19, 2014)

If she has new clients, she will definitely give them the nicer horses to get them "hooked" for lack of a better word. New clients will often be treated better than the rest until the trainer feels confident they won't be leaving any time soon. This seems to be really common among big lesson barns. The wealthier clients, or those who pay for more lessons have preference. That is just politics in the horsey world. 

I've been in your shoes and got to ride horrible horses. Horrible as in bad, mean, bitter creatures... and that was not because my trainer felt that I was not worthy of riding the nicer ones, but rather she thought I was more fit to ride the unruly ones and handle them better than the newbie students or more timid riders. 

Handling the difficult horses helps you become a better rider far quicker than those riders who only handle the "push button" type of horse.. Once you ride a very bad horse and succeed, any steed that comes your way will be peace of cake! However you must be comfortable with the horse given to you and feel relatively safe. You must also be willing to take the challenge, otherwise this is not completely fair to you as a client who wants to make the most out of the lesson you pay for. 

Remember that you are paying for lessons to learn, not to ride and tame wild willies. Nor to educate spoiled lesson horses for the trainer. If riding a bad horse is really hindering your progress you can do the following: 

Request to fully/half lease a horse that is nice, or talk to your trainer. After all, you are paying her, if she cannot meet your expectations and offer you a better service, you need to change trainers. You might be in the wrong place with someone who doesn't have good quality lesson horses. Put your money in a place that makes you feel like every single penny was worth it. 

The really good trainers have nice, happy and healthy lesson horses. That form part of a good lesson program that allows their clients to grow without unnecessary setbacks (A.K.A horses not suitable for lessons.)


----------



## arabbarrelracer (Jun 2, 2015)

Hello!! When I lived in Germany I took lessons for riding English.
My friend rode a horse named Secret Service. I rode a horse named Codemaro.
Codemaro was cantankerous and onery all the time. Constantly rearing, bucking and bolting around the arena. Not a good match for a young rider but thats how it was. Secret Service and my friend were always being complimented for always doing everything perfectly. I thought my friend was a better rider than me.
One day my friend wasn't able to come and a newer girl was there so the instructor had me ride Secret Service for the first time. I always had problems with riding Codemaro and thought I was a terrible rider and that my friend was better until I was told to ride Secret Service. I found he had a super soft mouth. Cues were instantly obeyed and my lesson was perfect whereas Codemaro was stubborn, mean and hard mouthed and often ran away with the bit.
Needless to say the better trained ones are easier to ride 90% time.
Keep your chin up and keep going. One day you may understand what her point was. Also you could ask her.
Good luck!!!!!


----------



## kelseyannxo (Jun 25, 2015)

I agree with all of these responses. This probably isn't what you were thinking you'd hear, but everyone is right! She is most likely giving you these horses because she believes you can handle them. That's a compliment. If a trainer comes across a new rider, she's most likely going to give her student the easiest, most well behaved horse on the property so that the rider can advance his/her own skills in the saddle as opposed to focusing on the horses behavior. i.e, building up your leg strength, learning to sit the trot, etc., rather than focusing on "crap, my horse won't respond to any of my cues." A new rider needs to learn nice equitation first - working with a difficult horse comes after. Understand? Your trainer trusts that you can handle these horses because your skills are up to par! 

With that being said, I can understand the frustration of working with a horse that just doesn't want to listen. You know a great deal now, however, you are still working on your skills, and so I can see where you can be upset that your lesson is revolving around controlling these lazy or misbehaved horses when you just want to improve and work on your eq. 

Overall, you should take your trainers actions in a positive light, but don't be afraid to speak to her about your feelings. After all, you are paying money for your lessons, and you should leave feeling happy and satisfied! Don't be afraid to change barns if it comes down to it. I've done it plenty of times before finding a trainer, price, and atmosphere I was happy with.


----------

