# Mini rant about 'borrowed' saddle



## crazeepony (Dec 8, 2013)

It would appear that this girl has no issues with using other people's tack. Post a big sign on your stuff that you do no approve of anyone borrowing without asking. Not ACCEPTABLE. or post a sign that your horse has ring worm :?. That will stop her.

I put away someone's bridle once that I thought was mine. It was one I was not using so I thought to store it. The guy was so confused that his tack just disappeared. I heard someone talking about it and I went- Ah, let me check. Sure enough. I apologized to the person who was talking about it, telling her to let him know it was found and replaced in the spot he kept it. He had a kimberwick bit on his bridle. I didn't know anyone used a kimberwick but me so I assumed it was mine until further inspection, I discovered my mistake. Doing that with a saddle is a bit more complicated! 

It sounds like she is a spoiled kid that needs some boundaries explained.


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## SlideStop (Dec 28, 2011)

Maybe it's time to put a lock on your stuff! You can get a simple bike cable lock and thread it through stirrups, your bridle, and the saddle rack.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## peppersonlygirl (Jan 21, 2014)

I thought about a bike lock.

What should I respond back? Something that would scare her into never using someone's tack again. I like the ringworm comment!


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## DuckDodgers (May 28, 2013)

Tell her that you appreciate the apology, but that you will be contacting the police if you find that your stuff has been used again. Next time you see her in person, sit her down and have a stern conversation with her. Explain that she is not under any circumstances to touch your stuff or your horse. Reiterate that you will be telling the barn owner and contacting authorities if it happens again. That may sound extreme, but this girl needs a wake up call. "Borrowing" other people's things is completely unacceptable, and I've heard of it escalating to "borrowing" rides on people's horses when it's not nipped straight away. 

I'd also highly recommend locking away your stuff. If your barn doesn't have lockers then get a tack trunk for all your small things, and perhaps wrapping a bike lock around your saddle would work. I'd be more comfortable were it locked in place, but since the girl is using it and not stealing it a bike lock wrapped tightly around the underside should prevent its use.


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## Saddlebag (Jan 17, 2011)

Use without permission constitutes theft. A family "borrowed" my mare. I caught them about a mile away. Told the father I should call the police for stealing my horse. Kids had look of horror on their faces. I told the little girl to get off my horse, threw all their gear in the ditch and sent the mare home. Wasn't that a fine example he was setting for their kids. My mare was moved a week later.


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## stevenson (Sep 12, 2011)

i would publicly reply back on FB, that you accept her apology, but she is NEVER allowed to use any of your equipment. If you catch her, you will inform her parents, file a written complaint to the BO , and file theft charges against her.
The bike lock, if you can put an eye bolt on the saddle rack, and run the lock through the pommel and stirrups and through the eye. Give the BO a key in case of a fire , but she may not have time to get out saddles. I would also get a trunk or locker , cabinet that can be padlocked shut, put in your bridle halter brushes fly spray grooming items. Find one at walmart or target or lowes or home depot. good luck.


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## WildAtHeart (Jul 17, 2013)

Your approach should depend on her attitude about the situation. You never know, perhaps she is used to barn where everyone's stuff is everyone's. Give her the benefit of the doubt.

(of course if she is being rude and it continues, crack down)


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## MyBoySi (Dec 1, 2011)

I would lock up my stuff and tell her very bluntly, in person, that its not ok and sorry doesn't cut it, that its on the verge of theft and you don't appreciate it.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## DuckDodgers (May 28, 2013)

WildAtHeart said:


> Your approach should depend on her attitude about the situation. You never know, perhaps she is used to barn where everyone's stuff is everyone's. Give her the benefit of the doubt.
> 
> (of course if she is being rude and it continues, crack down)


The problem with a lax, benefit of the doubt attitude is that some people will sort of see it as "getting away with it". They saw that you were unhappy, but there were no real consequences. What's to stop her from doing it again but doing a better job of hiding it? Lots of kids will say whatever they can to get people off their backs when they're in trouble... "I'm sorry, I won't do it again, I didn't know any better, etc" when that just means they'll be sneakier next time. You don't need to run out and file a police report for this incident, but make sure she knows it'll happen if it happens again. 

Perhaps in your reply you could tell the girl that you'd like to talk to her in person. Now that I think about it I could see a young girl completely freaking out if you threaten to call the police on her through a facebook message... it's really hard to evaluate a person's tone through the internet and I wouldn't want to completely frighten a girl over what could have been an innocent mistake. This way you could tell her in person that the cops will be called IF it happens again and you can get a better idea of how she feels about the situation. In all reality the girl probably didn't think what she was doing was a big deal and it won't happen again, but I do think she should expect serious consequences now that she knows better. After all, I've seen "borrowing" horses come as the next step in such scenarios.


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## Chevaux (Jun 27, 2012)

Perhaps its worth a call/message to her parents (assuming she's underage) that what she did was neither invited nor wanted and it wasn't the first time it happened therefore the next time it's a call to the police?


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## nikelodeon79 (Mar 3, 2008)

She apologized. Accept her apology PRIVATELY (definitely don't post on her public FB wall, that's very poor form).

Explain that you are not OK with anyone using your things and if it happens again, you will have to press charges.

Be firm, not rude.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Mulefeather (Feb 22, 2014)

You could say something to the following:

Hello (hername),

I'm really glad you apologized, however this isn't the first time you've "borrowed" my things without asking. From now on, please know that my tack is strictly off-limits from anyone but myself using it. I am not OK with anyone using my things without my permission, ever, and I would appreciate not having to have this conversation with you again."


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## ingwal (Mar 1, 2015)

This reminds me of the time when a girl at the barn borrowed my new saddle that had been specially fit for my old horse. When I got to the barn one day the saddle had an inch wide scratch in the seat. 

if she is young she probably just want to borrow it if you have better/more expensive/nicer equipment than her, but it is still not ok at all. You can tell her to ask you first if she really wants to borrow something.. 

But at least she gives it back  people at my barn doesn't..
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Shosadlbrd (Nov 3, 2013)

I would definitely contact her parents as well as let the girl know she is not to ever borrow anything of yours again.
And the barn owner should be in the know also.


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## Girl girly (Oct 21, 2012)

Since its not the first time it happen i would change her for thief or atleast talk to her parents. It not right for someone of to be just taking something that's as pricey as a saddle( most are worth $50 -10,000 ) even if they are underage. Its not right and the fact that she said sorry over Facebook wouldn't cut it for me.


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## Saskia (Aug 26, 2009)

I'm not sure how I'd deal with this situation. I'd be really upset for sure. 

What she did was way out of line, but filing charges with the police is a bit much I think, considering she is a child and she used a saddle and returned it undamaged. 

However if you let people get away things, if you let their behaviour go unchecked, they don't learn or change. She obviously didn't learn when she took your bridle so there needs to be some sort of consequence. Talk to your barn owner and I think it'd be worth her having a sit down with the kid's parents and working out a punishment. Perhaps a weeks ban on riding? Or certain chores like maybe she should have to clean some stables or yards out. Or the BO should fine them, make them pay $50 of your board.


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## peppersonlygirl (Jan 21, 2014)

I really like the idea of a fine, my barn owner might like that idea as a consequence. 

Thanks for all of the suggestions.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## DuckDodgers (May 28, 2013)

Have you spoken to the girl about it yet? I'm always nosy about such matters and curious to hear what the outcome was :lol:


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## Saddlebag (Jan 17, 2011)

Often in cases like this it is better to befriend the girl and have her on your side, rather than her going behind your back. She may not have realized the gravity of her actions. Do accept her apology, and let it go at that. It is better to let her know how hard you've worked to buy your tack and how much you cherish it, than to make threats.


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## waresbear (Jun 18, 2011)

You should not have been put in the position in the first place. I would say the BO should handle it. If it where my barn, and a boarder was using other boarders' belongings without permission, I would read them the riot act, make it clear in no uncertain terms that they will be turfed if it happened again. I wouldn't want my other boarders to be put in a difficult position, it would be my responsibility to deal with it, solely.


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## Peanutbutter (Apr 23, 2014)

Get one of these with a lock on for youre things:


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## peppersonlygirl (Jan 21, 2014)

My BO says she handled it. I didn't respond to the girl's Fb message... haven't seen her at the barn. Love the lock box idea.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## stevenson (Sep 12, 2011)

PB , that is a neat box. is there a brand name on it ?


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## Peanutbutter (Apr 23, 2014)

stevenson said:


> PB , that is a neat box. is there a brand name on it ?


This one is from Eldonor.


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## Hammersmith Farms (Jun 22, 2014)

The BO or mgr needs to step in and talk to the girl. If its a large barn I would think that it might be time to lock your stuff up. If its small its just time to have the barn deal with the situation.


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## Hammersmith Farms (Jun 22, 2014)

We provide each boarder (horse) with a locking metal trunk, you shouldn't have to buy something the whole purpose of a tack room is security.


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## churumbeque (Dec 20, 2009)

stevenson said:


> i would publicly reply back on FB, that you accept her apology, but she is NEVER allowed to use any of your equipment. If you catch her, you will inform her parents, file a written complaint to the BO , and file theft charges against her.
> The bike lock, if you can put an eye bolt on the saddle rack, and run the lock through the pommel and stirrups and through the eye. Give the BO a key in case of a fire , but she may not have time to get out saddles. I would also get a trunk or locker , cabinet that can be padlocked shut, put in your bridle halter brushes fly spray grooming items. Find one at walmart or target or lowes or home depot. good luck.


 you could just run a bike lock through the stirrups and no hooks needed.


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