# dealing with jerks on social media?



## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

Nope. You must be enjoying the attention on some level, if you don't want to block them.


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## Cielo Notturno (Sep 12, 2013)

The block button is a wonderful tool. Use it and throw them out of your life. 
You don't dave to deal with people's nonsense.


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

Scuse you, SR. I hate using the block button because it comes across as immature. I've never been blocked by anybody who wasn't a stupid thirteen year old who didn't want to hear that Princess bites and kicks them because they let her. But then again, I'm not the sort of stupid jerk who'll hit on a girl who's in a relationship, and then turn internet stalker when she turns them down.

Either way, my inner psycho self is greatly enjoying the freedom she's getting tonight. They might get a block if they succeed in actually annoying me tonight, but I'd really rather not. I've only EVER blocked someone because I was 14 and he was a creepy old man asking for nude pics. Blegh.


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## Maple (Jan 10, 2012)

FB is set up that you can limit what certain people can see on your profile. If you don't want to upset or offend by deleting you can go make is to that they can't see what you post.


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

That's a great system, until FB decides to update, and all your privacy settings get changed to public without your consent!

It's irritating enough changing everything back to friends only every couple of months...


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## NBEventer (Sep 15, 2012)

Sounds like you have an excuse for everything.

Tell them flat out to leave you alone. Any further contact will be considered harassment and treated as such and you will be contacting the police. Simple.


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## gingerscout (Jan 18, 2012)

I'm sorry but I have to agree with others.. not wanting to block them makes it sound like you like the attention, It is not immature to block people, heck I have blocked 1/3 my whole family, and getting defensive about it isn't going to win you any sympathy from everyone for them bugging you


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

lone wolf horse training said:


> Scuse you, SR. I hate using the block button because it comes across as immature.




If you've told them their attentions are not welcome and they continue to harass you, the block button is your best defense instead of acting like a shrieking harridan.

I still say on some level you're welcoming the attention because any mature, intelligent, rational adult would block them and be done with the nonsense instead of making up excuses for why you can't or won't. :?


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

They've both been told a couple of times now, but perhaps I need to make it a little more clear. They've either given up or gone to bed for the night (it's after 1am, I'm a night owl), so next time they try to bother me, it'll be met with "This is getting to the point of being harassment, and if it continues, I will be discussing my options with police. Do not comment on my posts, post on my timeline, or contact me in any way again."

I cop enough crap for being a female gamer without them bothering me. You're right, I don't need it.

But one of them as good as admitted he wanted me to block him, and I'm just stubborn (petty?) enough to refuse to give him what he wants.


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## gingerscout (Jan 18, 2012)

lone wolf horse training said:


> I cop enough crap for being a female gamer without them bothering me.


I don't it's right for anyone to give you crap for being a female gamer though, some of the best gamers I know are female, and I lose to them often..LOL


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

Unfortunately it's a fact of life.

And then those same jerks wonder why they don't have girlfriends. *shrug*


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## BarrelracingArabian (Mar 31, 2010)

Im sorry if you don't want to take the few seconds to block someone who is borderline harrassing you for fear of being called "immature" then you must not mind it that much. 
I have blocked people for a few reasons. The most recent was the guy I'm talking to currently has a crazy ex who tracked me down, tried to add me and was messaging me nasty messages. I simply blocked her as I do not have the patience nor the desire to put up with it. 
Blocking people does not make you immature.


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## wausuaw (Apr 15, 2011)

If you are against the block button, then I would simply de-friend them and ignore them. You've made yourself clear, and now they are pining for attention. If you don't give it to them, then they will move on to other things.


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## squirrelfood (Mar 29, 2014)

lone wolf horse training said:


> They've both been told a couple of times now, but perhaps I need to make it a little more clear. They've either given up or gone to bed for the night (it's after 1am, I'm a night owl), so next time they try to bother me, it'll be met with "This is getting to the point of being harassment, and if it continues, I will be discussing my options with police. Do not comment on my posts, post on my timeline, or contact me in any way again."
> 
> I cop enough crap for being a female gamer without them bothering me. You're right, I don't need it.
> 
> But one of them as good as admitted he wanted me to block him, and I'm just stubborn (petty?) enough to refuse to give him what he wants.


Now THAT *IS* childish.


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

Honestly it's little more than a mild irritation. I gave up caring what other people think of me years ago and decided to focus on making myself happy. I mean, the moment someone says anything against my mother or my girlfriend, God help them, but about me? Whatever, have a nice day, I sure will.

I now see where I might have implied I went full harpy on these guys. I didn't. There's no point, I'm too tiny for it to have any effect. When I let my inner psycho loose, she only cavorts around inside my mind, painting some incredible creatively violent scenes (which serve as excellent material for my writing... the main character of my current project is a psychopath). Occasionally a word or two slips out, but for the most part I'm too busy enjoying all the writing muse to show my would-be serial killer side.

Which is honestly why I write. Without a constructive method for me to vent, my temper would get the better of me far more often and far more severely than it does. I'm just lucky I have such an incredibly vivid imagination. My words come to life as I write.

Speaking of which, I should really get back to it. I'm MONTHS behind on this chapter...


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

Ah, let me be petty about the one thing, he'll never know the main reason I haven't blocked him yet is because I know he wants me to.

They both want reactions. So I won't give them the satisfaction. Don't feed the troll, and it will get bored and leave on its own.

Edit; does it show that I hate people?


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## Foxhunter (Feb 5, 2012)

Quite honestly if you are not prepared to block them but will call the police shows how you want attention.

You must because this seems to be another way to gain it. 

Blocking is a great button.


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

Usually the threat of police action is enough, Foxhunter - though that being said I don't make threats I won't follow through on.

You might like the block button, but I don't, and that's just my personal opinion on the thing. It's no different to me liking Thoroughbreds, and someone else hating them. Different people have different opinions. We're all entitled to them. Please don't shove yours down my throat


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

You obviously_ wanted _opinions, or you wouldn't have posted the thread in the first place.

Everyone except you thinks blocking them is the adult, mature thing to do. You'd rather be passive-aggressive and protest how much you hate it, instead of just being done with it.

Methinks you thought people were going to agree with you, and when the overwhelming majority didn't you suddenly come up with the, 'Whatevah, I don't care what anyone else thinks'.


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## Missy May (Feb 18, 2012)

Well, it seems a bit humorous to me. I am married, but I am trying to visualize going to a party alone, married or in a relationship, and accepting a friend request from a few guys I met while at that party . I mean, it wouldn't be a "mystery" to me why they wanted to be friends - unless I thought they were gay.


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

I wasn't alone - I was with a couple of friends. It's not the sort of party you go to for networking. You go there to game and fileshare. And maybe chat with other PC enthusiasts about their rigs and what works for them.

My gf would have been there too but she had other things planned, and there wasn't really enough room in the car for three people, three gaming rigs and the ridiculous amount of stuff I somehow manage to ALWAYS take with me to EVERYTHING, so a fourth and her computer wouldn't have fit in the same car anyway.

It wasn't 'that' kind of party. Therefore, the last thing on my mind was whether the guys there were 'interested'. I shut down a little flirting early on, and that was the end of that. Or so I thought.

Apparently some people can't take no for an answer. *shrug*


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## danny67 (Nov 27, 2012)

Are you like 17? A gamer? Why are you posting on a horsy board. And if you have a GF then you are only battin for one team unless you cheat on her.

Sorry, but you sound like a lot of drama.

Now go find that button and block me! muhahahaha!


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

20, and I can have horses and be interested in gaming at the same time. The two are not mutually exclusive.

Gaming is a hobby. Horses are my life, and will hopefully be a career.


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

My orientation, by the way, is not affected by whether I have a significant other or not. The fact that I have a girlfriend does not exclude the fact that I also find men attractive. We BOTH joke about kidnapping and sharing our favourite celebrities - male AND female. Don't worry though - we aren't creepy stalker types who'd actually DO it.


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## beau159 (Oct 4, 2010)

lone wolf horse training said:


> I hate using the block button because it comes across as immature.





lone wolf horse training said:


> I gave up caring what other people think of me years ago and decided to focus on making myself happy.


........ But I thought you don't care what other people think of you? So why would you care if they thought you were immature for using the block button?

Use the block button and it will stop the drama. Period.

Unless you like drama. Then carry on.


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## Saddlebag (Jan 17, 2011)

I suspect lone wolf is enjoying not only stringing the fellas along but us too.


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## Mulefeather (Feb 22, 2014)

I'm inclined to agree with Saddlebag, given the enormous amount of lurid detail she's managed to give us about herself, her life, and her motivations behind why she can't use a tool that was specifically put there to enforce boundaries with people who won't leave you alone. 

Use the tool, or don't. Your choice. If you choose not to set boundaries with people (and yes, I count not removing someone who is harassing you choosing to not set boundaries), then you're choosing to accept the crap they are handing you.


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## aubie (Aug 24, 2013)

Way to much drama for me.


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## NBEventer (Sep 15, 2012)

This is the same poster who thinks the horse welfare rules of the FEI are ridiculous and absurd, so honestly her drama doesn't surprise me. I doubt she is 20.

I myself like the block button and find it rather useful. If ya catch my drift ;-)


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## DuffyDuck (Sep 27, 2011)

Why would you NOT block them?

They aren't people you deal with in every day REAL life who will have a throw down at the mall with you, or knock on your door. They are people you met at an event.

Does your girlfriend know? I have had men from my past try and get in touch to see if I'm single and hook up, and I politely decline and tell them I'm in a wonderful relationship. The fact you have declined to tell them you are in a relationship, regardless of you being a lesbian, bi or whatever, would upset anyone on the other half of the relationship if they found out.

Why don't you either block, or ignore!? If you block them, no chance of them stalking you or being in contact. Ignoring them means they can talk to themselves.

You're being immature by throwing out silly excuses. If you are 20, you have a hella lot of growing up to do.

Move on.

They're men, they got rejected.
You're in a relationship, they're not.


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## GreySorrel (Mar 5, 2012)

lone wolf horse training said:


> My orientation, by the way, is not affected by whether I have a significant other or not. The fact that I have a girlfriend does not exclude the fact that I also find men attractive. We BOTH joke about kidnapping and sharing our favourite celebrities - male AND female. Don't worry though - we aren't creepy stalker types who'd actually DO it.


IF your sexual orientation was not anything significant, then why have you continue to tell all of us in several of your posts? I am heterosexual...so?! I DON'T bat for the other team. *shrugs* Never understood why someone who was anything other than a heterosexual has to tell everyone their sexual orientation, not like I go around telling anyone...and my husband isn't often with me as he has a demanding job that keeps him away so no no one knows just by looking at me, unless I tell them, and that certainly does not define who I am, unlike others....

If they are on facebook, then if you don't feel you need to block them, simply take them off your friends list. I have had to do that to a few people, I have also blocked a few as well, I personally don't LIKE drama, lord knows I have had enough from the witch behind us to choke anyone...I want peace and serenity and quiet in my own life. So, bottom line, either boot, ban, and move on our enough talking about it, it is like beating a dead horse....


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## BarrelRacer23 (Aug 17, 2011)

Sounds like one big drama fest.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

DuffyDuck said:


> The fact you have declined to tell them you are in a relationship


When on earth did I say that?

I'm pretty sure I've mentioned multiple times that they KNOW I'm in a relationship, and they knew then.


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## DuffyDuck (Sep 27, 2011)

lone wolf horse training said:


> When on earth did I say that?
> 
> I'm pretty sure I've mentioned multiple times that they KNOW I'm in a relationship, and they knew then.


My sincerest apologies. I misread. 

I'm also sorry that out of my entire post that was the only thing you thought significant enough to pick out.

I'll tell you something.

I was with friends in a gay bar. A guy walks in and starts chatting up my guy friend. 
My guy friend calls me over to rescue him. This guy has a girlfriend! But he bats for both teams! His girlfriend has no idea he is in a gay bar, let alone chatting up gay guys. Yes, she knows he is bi. Yes, she'd be destroyed to know he was looking for attention else where. 

Ring a bell? That guy was shamed and shunned by the rest, no one wanted his dirty laundry.

I have a feeling that if your girlfriend had any idea that you had to second guess blocking or stopping any contact with those "jerks" she would be pretty darn upset. 

The guy did it because he wanted the attention, he wanted her attention but he wanted the thrill of getting someone to flirt with him, and to whip the carpet from under their feet when he so chose to...power play, I think they call it.

Grow up. Grow a set. Get rid of nuisances in your life. I still have NO idea why you are harping on about them being jerks when it's so clear you bask in their attention, good or bad. You know, I hear child psychologists say the same thing about toddlers. Perhaps you haven't grown out of that stage, yet?


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## gingerscout (Jan 18, 2012)

it's just the typical teenage I'm better than you, don't have to deal with my actions YOLO crap we see everywhere.. sometimes I feel sorry for my daughter to grow up.. I keep seeing stuff like hey I did something illegal.. YOLO, other person why did you do that, Because I can.. don't question my motives.I can do what I want.. blah blah blah.. *BLOCK* <----- makes life SOOOO much simpler..LOL


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## natisha (Jan 11, 2011)

Allowing something to continue to happen that you could easily stop-not normal

Having fantasies of kidnapping people - not normal

Inner self serial killer-not normal

Referring to your thoughts as another person-not normal

_If _the OP made up this whole thing for whatever reason- not normal

I suggest therapy.


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## RegalCharm (Jul 24, 2008)

lone wolf horse training said:


> When on earth did I say that?
> 
> I'm pretty sure I've mentioned multiple times that they KNOW I'm in a relationship, and they knew then.


Grow up, you want to brag, boast stay on FB.


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

natisha said:


> Allowing something to continue to happen that you could easily stop-not normal
> 
> Having fantasies of kidnapping people - not normal
> 
> ...


One is leaving me alone now. The other is blocked. I was getting dangerously frustrated with him and there comes a point where writing someone as a character and then brutally killing them in-story is just not satisfying enough.

We JOKE about it, it's not fantasies, it's just fangirl stuff and a somewhat twisted sense of humour. Not quite a British sense of humour, we're a bit darker than that here in Australia.

The rest, yep, definitely not normal. But I like me, and I control the potentially violent side of me. I am who I am and "normal" is something I've never wanted to be.


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## Remali (Jul 22, 2008)

Well, I would say to do what makes you most comfortable, personally I would block them.

And I would say a couple of others on this thread need to not be so rude and nasty, why can't people just have a polite discussion any more, and maybe develop a sense of humor?


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## Remali (Jul 22, 2008)

natisha said:


> Allowing something to continue to happen that you could easily stop-not normal
> 
> Having fantasies of kidnapping people - not normal
> 
> ...


Lone Wolf said he was a writer, and writing about this, I guess I don't see it as not normal. If that is the case, then Stephen King is in serious trouble. :wink:


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

Thank you Remali 

King is a very popular writer, but I don't personally like his work much. I don't find it very frightening. Which is the point of his books - they should be scary.

I did, however, very much enjoy the movie _Secret Window_, which is based on one of his novellas. To this day, it's still the most terrifying thing I've ever watched, though it's more of a psychological horror and for me, as a slightly psychotic writer myself, everything the main character went through frightened me. Especially the twist at the end. Excellent movie, starring Johnny Depp. I'm nowhere near as psychotic as the main character in it, but the terrifying part for me was that that WOULD be me if I didn't have such good control of the more dangerous side of me.


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## Remali (Jul 22, 2008)

I'm a Johnny Depp fan, but I haven't seen _Secret Window_, yet. I'll have to look for that one. Depp's movies are always interesting!


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

It's an awesome movie. I really enjoyed it. I actually haven't watched a Depp movie I didn't like.


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## gingerscout (Jan 18, 2012)

Secret window was actually quite good, it's an older movie of his, I don't agree with the all of them being good.. I thought the lone ranger was terrible..LOL


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

You don't know much about Stephen King if you think his writing is supposed to be monster - scary.

His earlier works play on the gruesome and gory angles but his later work, which is much more prolific, centers on the human condition and the horrific things that happen due to people's inhumanity to each other.

For someone who's supposed to be an aspiring writer, dismissing King's work is both arrogant and shortsighted. He's not just a horror writer, and even his older works contain a lot of psychological terror. Carrie wasn't just about some mutant telepath, she was a tortured soul.

The Dark Tower series played more on human interactions than it did horror, and anyone who thinks the Shawshank Redemption isn't an excellent example of storytelling doesn't truly understand how masterful writing can be.

The movie Stand By Me was based on the short story The Body, again written by King. Misery and Dolores Claiborne were both King novels as well.

So please tell me how someone who wants to be a professional psychological thriller writer can dismiss King's excellent repertoire of work?


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## natisha (Jan 11, 2011)

"I was getting dangerously frustrated with him and there comes a point where writing someone as a character and then brutally killing them in-story is just not satisfying enough."

"but for the most part I'm too busy enjoying all the writing muse to show my would-be serial killer side."

"Which is honestly why I write. Without a constructive method for me to vent, my temper would get the better of me far more often and far more severely than it does."
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No one sees anything wrong with these statements? I hope none of these are ever read at a trial.
The 'Thin Man' girls come to mind.


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

Probably best not to make WRITTEN, obviously psychotic threats. 

The interwebz isn't as anonymous as the OP apparently believes, and if someone decides to take her, 'I'm sooo dark, brooding and dangerous' claims seriously she could be in for a visit from law enforcement.


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## squirrelfood (Mar 29, 2014)

Nor are the 'net people as stupid as she seems to think........


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## Maryland Rider (Jul 2, 2013)

Well since we have now graduated to Stephen King.
Don't forget Shawshank Redemption.


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

I mentioned it already, but the poster image is awesome.:wink:


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## Maryland Rider (Jul 2, 2013)

I don't pay that much attention.
Just a little.

Most don't know it is King's work and are surprised.


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

King also wrote Danse Macabre, which is a nonfiction book used primarily as a tool for aspiring writers. He discusses psychological terrors, and what makes something scary or not for each generation of society. I read it years ago, because I'm always interested in the motivation behind an artist's work. 

His wife Tabitha is also a published author, although her body of work is much smaller and she doesn't write in the same genre as her husband. I've read several of her books.

My favorite King novel has always been The Stand. Excellent story about good and evil and the ordinary people caught up in extraordinary events, and their reactions and decisions.

Everything King writes is about the psychology of ordinary people and how they're either broken and fall, or rise above the situation.

So calling his work 'not scary', means someone doesn't understand his true motivation behind the stories.


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

I just don't enjoy his work, generally speaking. I have read The Stand, cover to cover. I had to force myself to keep going, and the ending was unsatisfying. His ideas are brilliant, I just find his prose tedious. The Stand was the only one of his books I was able to force myself to finish. I've tried to read others, but get about two or three chapters in, then get bored.

I loved Secret Window, but I watched the movie of that - I didn't read the novella.

I am extremely fussy with what I will read. I understand that King has a huge following for a reason. I'm just of the opinion that he's over-hyped, and I can't stand his writing voice.

This is my opinion. I know what I like to read, and King isn't it. I know how I want to write, and King's work isn't remotely similar to what I want to write. Why should I aspire to be like an author whose work I don't generally enjoy?

I know Shawshank is his work. I haven't read it, nor have I seen the movie. I can't, therefore, have an opinion on it.

I'm not a particularly fussy reader. If an author can grab me, and not lose me partway through the book, I'll read the book, and I won't even pick at the grammar. If the book doesn't grab me, I'll nitpick EVERYTHING until I get bored and put it down. Usually never to pick it up again.

I don't think it's arrogant not to like a certain author, regardless of how popular he may be. Pat Parelli is ridiculously popular and a huge number of us on this forum do not like him. Just because someone works with words, rather than horses, doesn't mean he's immune to the possibility someone may not be a fan of his work.

I never said I was BETTER than him. Again, I only said I don't enjoy the majority of his work that I have read, or attempted to read.


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## NBEventer (Sep 15, 2012)

I seriously wonder if the op is even real. Everything they post seems to be posted just to create controversy.


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

Reminds me of another poster who disappeared awhile ago when her 'all about teh dramaz' threads started being ignored. 

Been wondering the last few days if it's her, back under a new user name and persona. Lots of the same personality traits, unbelievable stories and delusions of grandeur.

I could be wrong and it's just another (bad) fantasy writer who appears to be just as narcissistic. Plenty of them out there.

Lone, you're allowed to not like King's work, but trashing him for being 'not scary' means you have no clue as to what he's really writing about. If you think good psychological horror is nothing more than slasher film fodder, then no, you're not going to like King's work.


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

As far as not liking a writer's 'voice', I get that. 

I can't stand John Saul. It's not that his stories aren't good, I just think he could be a heck of a lot less wordy. Why say in five pages what could be said in one?

I dislike Saul's writing style, but don't dismiss his contributions to his chosen genre. There's the difference. 

You can study an author's work for insights and reference even if you don't like his writing style, especially if you're an aspiring writer yourself. Successful writers always leave plenty of clues lying around for others to pick up and use.

The Parellis are a perfect parallel example, because even though I don't like their smoke, mirrors, circus act atmosphere and, 'anyone can train their own horse if they buy all our expensive garbage' spiel, there are still nuggets to be gleaned from that sideshow.


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## blue eyed pony (Jun 20, 2011)

Psychological horror is supposed to still be horror. Therefore, frightening. A page-turner. Paced properly for the story (NOT necessarily fast). Perhaps the reason I don't find his work really fits into the psychological horror genre, in MY OPINION, is that most of what he's writing about doesn't bother me at all. I have none of the usual fears a lot of people have. That's not to say I don't have fears, they're just not "normal" ones.

I forced myself through The Stand wondering when it was going to start being remotely exciting. It was interesting, but extremely slow, and I have a relatively short attention span. Even when I'm writing (which I'll do for eight or nine solid hours without a break) I'll jump from story to story to story. I doubt it helped that I was reading the "expanded" re-release, where King had put back in a lot of what his editor made him cut.

Now, generally speaking, if an editor makes you cut a scene, they do it because it's slowing the pace of the story in a spot where the pace needs not to be slowed. 

So, the edition I was reading didn't help my opinion of the book.

But I've read others, or tried to, and just couldn't get past the second chapter for utter boredom.

Secret Window terrified me. The "villain" was wonderful, and the twist at the end hard-hitting and close to home. But it's the only one of King's works that I've enjoyed.


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## Remali (Jul 22, 2008)

Not everyone "has" to like a certain author just because they too are also a writer. One's view on a certain author or book may be totally different on how someone else interprets it. But that certainly does not mean that they "don't know much". I'm hoping this doesn't turn in to another "bashing" thread... sadly seems to be heading that way. 

I wonder, after reading a few comments on here... would you say those things to someone's face? What happened to common courtesy and benefit of the doubt?

As far threats, that is a far stretch, I didn't see any actual threats, just someone venting, and we have all done that....


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## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

Saddlebag said:


> I suspect lone wolf is enjoying not only stringing the fellas along but us too.



you won't be strung along unless you put the rope around your own throat and say, "now pull some more".


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## Lockwood (Nov 8, 2011)

Closed for moderator review.


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