# Hell of a Learning Curve



## mmshiro

Imposter syndrome, eh? Don't worry about it - just watch your horse (which sounds lovely, by the way). When I go out with my BO, and she tells me I did a good job, she doesn't base that on my posture or the crispness of my aids, she bases it on the emotional state of the horse. "Relaxed horse" the entire ride = "good job". We'll never be perfect, but if you keep your horse relaxed, free of confusion or frustration, you did a good job with her, and she had a good time, too.


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## AnitaAnne

@Kalraii Just wanted to give you this :hug:

So inspiring to read your journal; you are really going after what means something to you. Katie sounds absolutely lovely and it is great to hear how supportive the stable is for you. 

If you let her, Katie will heal your soul :hug:


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## Kalraii

New pictures  that wasn't the saddler purchased and I'm sad the picture is bad  We had only just put the bridle on as well and was adjusted soon after!


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## Kalraii

Videos! Shame quality sucks from phone. Will have to invest in better tech now


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## Kalraii

*Today I Learned I Can't Ride*

So today was my first real lesson on Katie with an instructor. 

Green on Green makes ... a snotty, messy nose. Because Katie is safe and does have experience but she is GREEN school-wise... for the first time since our few rides together I finally got to see the true greenness of her. And her greenness highlighted how much of a terrible, awful, basically novice rider I am. Turns out I can't even control _myself_ at a *walk* let alone lead Katie to the correct answers. I rode truly, truly godawful and I am not ashamed to admit it. For the longest time I knew that getting my own horse, not a schoolmaster, would be the REAL beginning of learning how to horse both on and off the ground. I thought I could trot nicely? Turns out I can't. I thought I was soft in the mouth? Well I usually am but when Katie charges at a million miles an hour I literally couldn't help but brace and thus became the rider I'd chastise. "You don't slow by your seat, dummy, just yank on both reins!", said never by any decent instructor. Surely I'd be able to keep even contact? Nope, Katie is a real serious "looker" and if my reins were a washing line I'd take them back for a refund for being so ***. My stirrups felt too long - but the instructor said they were not a little, but VERY short for her taste. And I still kept losing them because Katie doesn't know how to pace and I'm also too rubbish to control myself and steer. Fast slow fast slow fast sloooowww fast slow FAST FAST FAST _screeeeeeechhhhhhhhhhh_ and *stop*. She particularly likes going fast towards the gate and slow away from it. Now I'm actually considered soft with my legs at one school I go to and kicking is truly a last resort. Without a crop/aide to follow up I prefer one sharp-ish jab compared to a soft whap whap on their sides after asking with a nice squeeze of course. But I've been told that I kick too much - this instructor wants Katie to respond off the lightest of squeezes so that is now BANNED. Oh.... and did no one thing to tell me that you're meant to shorten your outside rein FIRST?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Don't worry, the instructor said it was normal for a green horse and we'll work on each issue 

When I rode her before and I have, a few times actually, it wasn't like this. At first I was disheartened and stressed at how badly it was going, no lie. I knew Katie was green but the thoughts about not being good enough were coming true, are true, actually. And let's face it, today proved that if I was stupid enough to try school her myself I WOULD ruin her and put both of us at risk.

But then the instructor said that we can grow together with some extra help for the both of us and I felt better. They really are nice at this place and unafraid to tell me things I might not want to hear, but need to. As I grow older I've learned to embrace criticism as free advice. I've enlisted the help of the livery manager who will school her twice a week. One to lunge her and help build muscle as she's a bit wasted on her shoulder from a previously bad fitting saddle, apparently. And one IN the saddle. In fact, the manager rode Katie too but I'll write about that later. The instructor has said that she'd like to use Katie for a few half hour lessons a week but because she's so green, will be only putting her advanced (as in very advanced, competitive) riders on her. Katie had been very willing to be worked today and was eager to take her bridle and bit. When I showed it to her she came right over with a cheery expression. If she's not enjoying being worked for 5 hours a week (TOTAL) then I'm sure I'll know. But she has such a great temperament and seemed to enjoy herself, even if we both looked like idiots! So if she can enjoy a ride with me then I'm sure she'll enjoy it with better riders.

I have to say... I've not experienced the fear of not having contact before now (because her head is up or sideways). It's actually truly petrifying when you're riding a horse that ISN'T WESTERN PLEASURE TRAINED!!!! mg: Not that I've ever ridden western in my life. 

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*The Manager's Ride*


So I probably don't need to tell you how that went. She's 1000000x better than me of course, it being her life and breath to ride and work with horses. She was able to tell me what she was doing, why she was doing it and what things I could work on at a basic level. Between she and the instructor, once I'm more confident to school Katie alone, I will be set some basic things to work on. I feel very looked after!

Midway through her schooling the manager asked if she jumps. Hell yeah! I showed her the picture of Katie jumping and she was impressed with it enough to ask for permission to give her a go. Started off with crossbars. Katie LOVED IT. In fact she went for it and looked like she was jumping an invisible elephant. So we used a vertical one at a decent height (3ft/91cm guesstimate as it was by my waist). BOOYAH she even did a "happy bronc" haha. It was adorable. Good thing I wasn't on her though... 

So yeah the manager can jump her nicely but I can't even walk a straight line. But I'm super happy for Katie to have the opportunity to not have to put up with my poor excuse of a ride lol. 


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*
Tomorrow's Ride*

Did I ever mention that I have a married couple that have been riding with me for about 8 months? We mainly do group lessons, which by the way I feel are a scam after today's private frown_color at a another stable. I mean it's a scam in the sense that I feel like I've spent a lot of money but not got much out of it purely due to the nature of group lessons full stop. Anyway. I think Katie is too green for them NOW. She's too green for me. I'm legit borderline able to ride her and most of it is because she's a freaking angel that hasn't learned any bad habits nor learned how strong she can be. Yet. Silly innocent creature  I am just basing all of this on the lesson today lol.

The instructor has been made well aware of their current level of riding and will be taking it slow. I think that if I* felt I couldn't ride at all after today that my friends will feel as if they are doing it for the first ever time all over again. I have to admit their steering isn't great on a schoolmaster and Katie really needs some steering. She is also very forward but nicely forward, not "I'm going to dump you in 5 seconds" forward. However, I can see her running away purely out of misunderstanding if they tense up. 

So I'm a bit scared for them but the instructor is sensible. Will update tomorrow. I know I'm writing essays but I love details! I need this for when I develop Alzheimers. <3


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## Kalraii

*It was a disaster...*

So my friends, the married couple, turned up. We had a nice grooming session. Then it was time to mount. The wife went on first. And within 60 seconds the instructor looked at me and said it wouldn't work. She braced up, squeezed Katie and was so tight that a walk was impossible. The fast, panicked trot was very nearly a fast panicked canter at some points. Fortunately no bucking though it wasn't far off. The instructor is extremely competent and managed to get my friend to calm herself enough to eventually stop - but facing the corner lol. There was no way the husband who is more fearful and stronger in the leg would keep Katie steady. So my friend got off her and I got on instead since the lesson is paid for anyway. Phew. My heart was in my throat for a minute there.

Poor Katie was also frightened and after a few mins to settle we had her nicely standing by our makeshift mounting block and I got on. I guess I did learn something from yesterdays lesson as together we walked very nicely around the school, nothing like the panicked state with my poor friend. We spent around 20minutes walking around trying to achieve straightness. Katie has a bit of sass in her though and quarter-threatened to buck when I wouldn't let her turn and go towards the gate but didn't follow through. She dipped her head, seemed to think it through, then decided to listen. I love that my instructor explains the what and why and how to correct things in detail.

Her saddle cloth was slipping (it was brand new and the velcro straps weren't long enough to secure it to the saddle). Instead of risking another iffy we decided to end the ride itself on a good note there and then. So the instructor was going to lunge her for a bit and then teach me some. That's when she said/realised how fit Katie was and that a lot of her anxiety is also pent up energy. The 4/5 hours in the field would be nothing to her. Katie cantered and bucked for a long time before finally relaxing and letting out some steam. So before our rides we are going to lunge her first to take the edge off until she's in proper work and more settled. 

So here I am sitting with a migraine due to high blood pressure yesterday and today. I am so thankful nothing went wrong with my friend though it easily could have gone worse. I feel guilty for wasting their time but at least they will now know that I'm not withholding my horse out of greed. They even admitted they had no idea that Katie would be such a hard or scary ride. I asked the instructor if she honestly thought that I was good enough to ride Katie and she said yes, so there's that. 

I come away today feeling super anxious about everything. Time for a drink.


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## Dragoon

No time spent with horses is wasted, IMO. 

Only a non horse-person would rate their time according to how many minutes spent in the saddle or jumps jumped. Your friends are horse people now. Your friend got the valuable experience of trying a horse, and seeing someone else ride the same horse in a lesson. She got to see how you handled her, and hear the instruction you got. No doubt she has a lot to reflect on now regarding her own riding. I know that my wheels would sure be turning!

The same with you. Seeing how Katie responds to different people will help you. Great that its during the same hour so you can't make excuses for the weather, heat cycles or how close feeding time is. Your horse was reflecting her rider at that moment. And you can start telling yourself now that you are good for Katie. You were able to handle her, she was able to make herself understood, horses so need to feel like they have a voice. 
And it's only going to get better! 

Sounds like a great second lesson. The things most worth having are not usually easy.


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## Kalraii

Thank you so much @Dragoon btw your message meant a lot to me though I wasn't able to reply at the time of reading it! 

UPDATE TODAY: 

I have agreed to trial part-working livery. That works out 6 half hour lessons per week max. So three hours work (5 hours total per week including her 1 hour schooling and my 2 half hour lessons). She's not a novice ride which works in her favour as its more advanced riders on her. The instructor is amazing and I have done my fair share of "instructor shopping" these last few years. I think because its mostly livery clients she has that the standards she sets are far higher than that of a typical riding school. She wants a soft rider and horse and is VERY strict about that. I am welcome to come watch the lessons. In fact, today, I turned out up out of the blue just to give Katie a cuddle and was lucky to catch her halfway through a lesson. The rider is lovely. He rides better than me definitely. They even jumped her and she loves it! Though she was a bit clumsy and wasn't too hot on her leg tucking (which I have seen her do well!). This might sound silly but the rider seemed to really like Katie - he even gave her a kiss goodbye haha! I just love that she's being loved and taken care of.

Katie looked REALLY settled and far calmer this lesson than when I rode her before. She looked very happy and absolutely loved her jumping. So I'd say that it has been good for her. If it was just me riding her in her current state of greeness 2-3x a week it wouldn't be enough. She is already a little more supple than she was last week. I will obviously continue to monitor her and her spark carefully. She's still really fit though and it takes a lot to get her puffed xD In the next few weeks I'll be arranging for her to hack out in company. 

Phew. I am going to start using barrier cream for mud fever though, I think. Because even more horses have come down with it. Katie's pink skin seemed fine today but I'd like to get ahead of it just to be safe.


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## Acadianartist

I was thrilled to find your journal today! You are doing really well, so try to relax! I think you made the right decision to let an experienced rider get on Katie - he sounds perfect for her, and will be able to do a little more with her than you, which is good. 

I know it can be scary - trust me! I started a journal about my mare Kodak (which I really need to update). I bought her about a year and a half ago as a bombproof horse for myself. Turned out she wasn't so bombproof. I came very close to selling her, but instead, put on my big girl panties, and decided to restart her from the ground up. Literally, we did nothing but liberty work for weeks, and have now moved onto ground work. I stopped riding her for the first 2 months or so as per the instructor's suggestion, but started riding her again, with a coach, last fall. We are both improving, one day at a time. I had no intention of taking on a project, or a green horse, but ended up with one, and one with baggage to boot. It makes no sense for my 47 year old self to be doing this, none at all, but here I am, trying to work through her - and my! - anxiety issues. In a way, I think she is the best thing that ever happened to me. We have developed a relationship I did not know could exist between a person and a horse. 

Also, my daughter was a bit overhorsed at first. We bought her a very well-trained, but forward Arab when she was 10. Yeah, I might need to have my head examined. Except that he was a fantastically trained dressage champion, and show jumper, and we both fell in love with him. Problem was, he had a canter that would not stop. I mean, literally, my daughter could not stop him. The first time it happened, in an indoor ring luckily, she was in tears, and pretty terrified. No amount of pulling on him would make him stop, and her coach and I had to keep trying to cut him off. My daughter could canter fine on the lesson horses (yup, they're a whole other ball game), and had been cantering and jumping for two years when we got her this horse. It was a little discouraging for her, but she didn't want to sell him, and, well, because she takes after me I guess, just grit her teeth and went about figuring out how to control him. It took about a year for her to be able to canter him comfortably. You should see them now, it is a thing of beauty. I won't even canter him, but my 12 year old and her pretty Arab can fly like the wind like it's nothing. 

My point is that a lot of people were wondering why I didn't just get rid of him, and buy her a dead broke school horse-type mount. But if I had, she would have been bored out of her mind by now. He was just enough of a challenge for her. Last summer, they started off pretty rough at their first show, but by the end of the summer, were able to jump a course of low cross-rails, and bring home first and second place ribbons. She worked hard, and as a result, is very proud. You can look forward to the same! 

And I can so relate to your friends! As I've told you before, I have friends (also a couple) who have started to take lessons. At one of the shows, the woman (the better rider of the two) asked if she could ride my daughter's horse in a walk-trot class. She had ridden him at our house a couple of times, but just at a walk. I didn't think it was a good idea, because she hadn't ridden him a lot, and certainly not for quite some time. She'd only ridden him in the winter, in the snow, and he tends to be slower then. But I hated to disappoint, so asked my daughter, who eagerly said yes. It did not go well. My daughter's horse was difficult to control, not collecting, his head all over the place. I regretted giving permission for it, but it gave her a new appreciation for how hard he can be to ride at shows. My daughter also felt pretty good about the fact that she can jump this horse, and do a collected canter, when an adult can't even control him at a walk/trot! A learning experience for all. 

Anyway, just take it slow. Spend lots of time with Katie. Oh, and something else I learned is that it can take a year, even two, to really get to know a horse. I kind of thought that a couple of months would be enough, but it wasn't, at least not for me and Kodak. Maybe mares are different this way, but Kodak does not form a quick bond the way our gelding Harley does. You have to get to know her first. We're still working on it. 

This is an incredible journey you're on. Savour every minute! But also, slow down and relax. I've found yoga to be extremely useful to help me slow my breathing and regain control of my anxiety. I do Yoga with Adriene on Youtube. Free, and convenient! 

Good luck, and keep writing!


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## newtrailriders

mmshiro said:


> Imposter syndrome, eh? Don't worry about it - just watch your horse (which sounds lovely, by the way). When I go out with my BO, and she tells me I did a good job, she doesn't base that on my posture or the crispness of my aids, she bases it on the emotional state of the horse. "Relaxed horse" the entire ride = "good job". We'll never be perfect, but if you keep your horse relaxed, free of confusion or frustration, you did a good job with her, and she had a good time, too.


Hope it's OK to have a conversation in someone else's journal here - but I just want to THANK YOU for this! I've never heard anybody say this before and it makes so much sense.


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## jaydee

I've ridden a lot of hunting horses over the years, many of them from Ireland. Most of them have never seen an arena or taken part in a lesson program but they're safe as houses and great at what they do. Adapting to being a horse that's expected to work in a manège is confusing for them. The first time I tried to take my boss' ID mare around a working hunter course she jumped two fences and then took me over the hedge that bordered one side of the ring because that's what she thought she was supposed to do.
I tried to school her a few times but gave up because even though she could do it she hated it and to be honest she didn't need it because out on the roads or cross country she was perfect at the job she was kept for.
I hope you can persuade your Katie that her new life is going to be wonderful for her but its going to take a while. Its good that you've got someone who can guide you through it and better still is able to get on her and show you that it can be done
Just be patient and stop beating yourself up.


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## Knave

I am glad I found your journal! It will be fun to read about your adventures with Katie! 

You are awfully hard on yourself, but as I read everything so far I could only think of how you have set yourself up so fully for success!! Your humbleness will definitely be a benefit if you can stop beating yourself up. It will give you the ability to actually learn from those helping you. It sounds too like you have a lovely group of people helping you! 

I think that you will go far with Katie. I think she will turn out to be an amazing horse will a lot of different experiences to rely upon. Good luck in all that you do; I will be rooting for you!


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## Kalraii

BAH I'm still so bad at using the notifications tab! Thank you so much guys. I am just very anxious so I guess I do beat myself up a lot... but fortunately I have mastered the art of "forcing myself to do it anyway" knowing in a years time I'll look back and wonder why I stressed so much. I actually find it a RELIEF that when working with horses if there is an issue I only have to see what *I* did wrong, unlike working with people 

So catch-up time! Did I say I was anxious? Leading up to every lesson with Katie I almost want to puke. And the first 10minutes are just spent faking being brave LOL. But my terror is so distracting that when I mount up I look like a one armed axolotl trying to drive a Harley. I've also realised I'm paralysed from the ankle down as I cannot find my stirrups without a. looking and b. "booting" Katie. So I'm going to invest in some sort of thin leather riding boot as I just absolutely cannot get my stirrups gracefully and Katie is not the horse to practice on because I'll end up being carried to Africa  The funny thing is when I get on her, even though I'm worried sick (about what I have no idea), I am able to physically control myself enough to not brace. I have to actively give my hands to override the "oh sh*t" sensation when she feels like she's going to break out in a run haha. But it works! 

*The Ride* 

I have found something scary out. Katie can read my mind. I was suspicious before but yesterday proved it. All I have to do is _think_ fast and/or slow and she responds immediately. I haven't got great body control but I don't exactly have a choice as it turns out she is dead in the mouth. You just can't stop her with your reins. At all. Which is why, in retrospect, my friend had an issue because it is all she knows. The instructor thinks that she was ridden in a harsher bit for hunting so the current snaffle is a piece of cake compared to that pain/pressure wise. Because Katie much prefers a strong contact - too much actually but SHE seeks it... So we are teaching her to soften up. She is also not too keen on the crop but she was starting to nap at the gate and it was time to introduce a backup aide. She had a bit of a hissy fit but she's a smart girl and will soon learn it's not a big deal. She is also an INCREDIBLY AMAZINGLY FAST LEARNER. Like holy. She'll be taking a mile if I give an inch that's for sure. Guys... if you're new to horses get a damned trainer to keep YOU in check coz dayum. I did not expect to need *this* much discipline to be so consistent in every. tiny. thing. In particular I need to work on my heels (tell me something new, plz?) and ensuring that when I come out of a gait that I keep it forward. Because Katie likes to come to an immediate stop, if I let her. So in a way... she's sort of lazy. How can a horse be so forward and so responsive and yet... lazy? LOL. 

So for the first time since arriving we had a really GOOD ride. We both eventually relaxed. My instructor has this special touch where she knows exactly how to get the desired result. Almost as if she's a professional that trained her whole life... Katie has this bloody hell, energetic bouncy trot as she flings you up into the air but a rocking horse canter you could fall asleep on. It makes for difficult transitions. Right now I can't practice sitting trot on her as that's basically requesting a gallop at this point haha. So a very good, confidence boosting lesson. I have given myself a goal that next month from today I will ride her for 15mins alone in the school. 


*After the ride...*

Probably the BEST bit out of my day. I untacked her and walked her around the property letting her eat grass. And then as a treat I took her to the indoor school where she could have a roll without (GASP) a rug on. And she immediately galloped and bucked like an absolute nutcase on drugs. Guys it is really disconcerting to have her running at such speed, skidding at corners all the while I meekly stand there in the middle torn between giggling and preparing to scream for my life. I did something risky - I decided to not move, arms crossed as she ran towards me. And you know what? She stopped at a very respectable distance and requested a petting. Talk about exciting trust building exercises, 10/10 do not recommend. We did some mutual grooming and then she showed off again - she seems to really respond to my body language/voice putting on a bigger show the more appreciative I am. It's quite funny. But then she will always come back and be very respectful/gentle around me. 

Then I spent an hour grooming her while she sleepily ate her dinner. You know before when I said she sort of tried to cow kicked me a while ago? I think I was wrong. I think she's just actually a flailing idiot that can't control her legs. I was inspecting her feet and legs for mudfever (NOTHING WOOHOO!) and instead of picking up her hinds the normal way she like sticks it RIGHT OUT and wobbles it around. I was so confused but it was a bit scary having this fat off leg being waved at me. Because it was right against me I thought the safest thing to do was grab it so it would be more like a shove than a kick but she just went still... so I just looked at it and put it down nicely. So yeah. Awkward. I think I need to trust her a bit more in that sense but you all know... horse legs are no joke. 

So in case anyone hasn't realised I am absolutely in love with my horse haha. Turns out everyone else at the yard is also. I am VERY lucky. I know we paid a lot for Katie and many people all but said she was not worth it breedwise. But her temperament and bombproofability is everything to me. I don't think with my availability I'd have the resources to deal with a troubled horse. I have decided without a shadow of a doubt that my next horse will be from the great continent a pond over with western training for the both of us! In a few years I'll be making a trip to do some shopping and bring the poor sod back to thrive alongside the cobs haha. 

Hope you all have a great weekend


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## Kalraii

JUST LOOK AT THIS SLEEPY EATING CUTENESS! Note: it is an old yard that is being renovated a section a time (they are re-doing an outside school when the weather is nice). But the facilities, staff and turnout availability makes up for the ugliness of the stall. I am also super bowel tube about cleaning out her drinker as well.


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## Kalraii

@Acadianartist my original reply disappeared? :< I wanted to say thank you for your story. Actually I ghosted this forum a lot before really getting involved and your story with Kodak is one of the first I read. It was always an inspiration to see your courage in coping with what seemed like a never ending splurge of issues for a while and how you came out the other end. I am savouring every moment - I've been told I'm like a new mother haha. I am actually trying to get into meditation but you're right - yoga would also be great and along with all the physical benefits of it. I shamefully didn't think I'd need to be as fit as well.. I need to be haha. Thank you so much for all your support <3


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## tinyliny

I am enjoying your journal. it is fresh, and sort of honest, un-staged. I like that, becuase years from now you will look back and read it , and maybe laugh. But, be fair with yourself; you can't know something until you learn it, and it takes time and experience . I love how open you are to feeling every thing, without shame or artifice.

You and she sound like a good match . who cares about the money? life is for living, and if money can help that, then to what better use?

Oh, and wanted to add, . . please refrain from profanity, even it if does add color to the narrative.

oh, and another thing . . I remember how before each lesson I used to be nearly sick to my stomach with anxiety. know the feeling well!


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## Acadianartist

Hey @Kalraii! I just came back from a work trip so haven't had time to get on HF, but got caught up just now. You are doing FANTASTIC! It sounds like letting her run her butt off in the indoor was good for her and you. They are just amazing animals aren't they? And it blows your mind when you feel that connection. It's addictive  I started to play a liberty game with Kodak called the boomerang game, where I send her away, she runs in a big circle, tosses her head, throws in a little kick here and there, then I invite her in, and she trots right on over to me for scratches. Sounds like that's what you two were doing. 

So yes, the anxiety. I had it a lot after I fell off Kodak last summer and got a concussion. Not just when I rode, but even just handling her. You'll be glad to know it goes away. I love spending time with my girl now, and we're both very calm and relaxed. I don't have a lot of time to write about it lately, but we are continuing to progress together, and have not had a bad experience in months. We're doing lessons with a coach, and that's been hugely helpful. I'm surprised by how well things are going! I honestly believe it's all due to the time I spent with her on the ground. So I think you are doing everything right, from getting a trainer to help, to spending lots of time with Katie on the ground. And that video is adorable! 

I also agree with tiny... this journal is extremely fun to read. And give yourself lots of time, keep falling in love, and beautiful things will come out of this relationship.

I look forward to hearing lots more about your adventures as the weather warms up!


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## carshon

I am going to add my appreciation of your journal. I want to add - that your anxiety is not just you. I have been around horses all of my life and used to be the one that "rode anything" but age and a couple of kids as well as a few extra pounds and an office job have changed my balance and my confidence. I have had days where the thought of riding a horse made me ill - but "fake it till you make it" became my mantra. My kids are older now and a diet and some yoga have helped - as well as a horse I trust.

you can do this! Katie is super cute and I love reading about your progress!


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> I have found something scary out. Katie can read my mind.


Your next assignment is to make this purposeful. She can detect things that you always do with your body before you give the aid to transition - gathering reins, shift your balance, check your seat in the saddle, etc. So you don't want to give those aids unintentionally, but when you do it intentionally, it'll look like magic to onlookers. 

I have an extremely forward horse, so when I want her to trot, I carefully give her a bit of a "driving seat". If I want "launch", I cluck - a smidgen of a squeeze usually being optional. But she, too, picks up on my gathering the reins and anticipates the transition.

You got an awesome horsey - difficult enough to challenge you, but not so difficult to be frustrating for your progression. Very cool, very cool.


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## tinyliny

Yes, I agree with @mmshiro . . . . knowing that your horse can 'read your mind' (I think of it more as 'read your intention') can be both helpful and difficult.

The helpful part is if you are thinking, " I'd like to go over that little jump, not around it", and she feels your intention, and she has no strong countering thought of her own, she'll take you at your word.

The difficult thing is when your thinking voice doesn't match up with the intention that your body projects. like . . you want your hrose to canter on the lungeline, but her pinning of ears, or threats to rear make you feel concerned about asking. So, when you ask, your body is not as committed as you think you are internally. your unsureness comes through your body, and your horse reads THAT.
So, you are asking 'canter!", but your body is saying 'maybe? please? could you? . . . and that schism between what aids a person applies (or thinks they are applying) and the true intention broadcast through their body, is very disconcerting for a hrose.

That is one reason that even if a handler is quite harsh to a horse, if he/she is predictable, and if her/his actions match his clear intentions, a horse can feel ok , and even prefer that person to one who is, in effect, wishy-washy.

The other thing about mind reading, is how adept you'll become at reading HER mind! That's the thing I like about horses; their actions ALWAYS match their intentions/thoughts. It's that old WYSIWYG.


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## Kalraii

Ah thanks guys. I'm glad I'm not the only one that gets anxious. On the surface everyone looks a pro haha <3 Yes Acadian that's exactly what we do though I didn't know there was a name for it. I actually just made sure than in-between her nutty gallops around the arena that I "bring her back" and check in. I find that she's more affectionate OUT of her stable and more likely to mutually groom when she's not in or haltered. So a bit of reassurance and independence I think? I haven't had as much time as I'd like but am flattered that she does it in an open area where she really has the choice. Naturally a sweetheart. 

Oh man.... the time I lunged her I was like "trot. terrrrrrrrrrrot. pls? ty." to !good girl!" 

Haha. It was hilariously pathetic and I wish you could have seen the eye she was giving me when I asked... It was akin to her expressino saying "well, are you going to tell me or what? You gotta do better than that Kalraii. C'mon, woman up!" I was being coached by the instructor for the record and she did finish it up with lunging on both leads nice and neatly with NO FUSS. She didn't even need to scream. Her body language wasn't even loud. It was amazing to watch. And yet I tried all sorts of strange accents, tones and pitches and couldn't get her to do what I wanted. Managing the line in itself was a distraction so I'll be better prepared for next time. She gets lunged by staff just once a week for a short period to build muscle on her top-line without the impediment of a saddle or rider. There has already been a difference in the dip of her shoulder where the saddle previously squished it! It's not a long term thing so I'm not interested in pushing learning how to lunge at the moment especially as she clearly finds it boring as hell (I don't blame her coz it IS). Eventually I will need to, more for assessing soundness and whatnot in future I guess? A safety feature! I imagine with difficult horses it will offer them a lot more in training than what she needs?

But she reads my mind wherever. When I'm grooming and I want her to move over I don't even need to touch her. Very light to backup. She walks by my side and matches pace, something I've not taught her for sure. In the saddle I just cannot relax with self-congratulation as she slows down. I have to be consistently focused to keep her pace and ESPECIALLY with downward transitions. A bad bad habit of letting the horse go to a walk from canter just because routine of being at the back of the line in schools. We did a fair bit of trot to canter so forth to help ingrain me to think forward. When she was a getting a bit fast the instructor told me to think "slow" and as she ignores the rein cue for halt anyway, listened to my body and almost stopped abruptly. I didn't think I moved a muscle but I did something as I was jerked forward. The only thing that makes this INCREDIBLY hard is her bouncy trot. I can't even practice sitting trot on her as she is (as I am). It's a fast, big stride with a lot of upward momentum. It's a lovely trot... just I can't sit it lol. 

You guys have given me more motivation that next time I ride her to try be even more subtle and self-controlled with my ask. I have seen some threads on here where horses get TOO good at anticipating a request and develop an unwanted habit. So I gotta keep things fresh, keep her on her toes. This is a hard task as she's so good at reading me in addition to being eager to please. OH MAN I'M SO EXCITED TO RIDE AGAIN! WHY DO YOU TORTURE ME SO? I have work tomorrow :'<


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## Kalraii

*MY FRIENDS JOURNEY & some venting*


I am chronicling my time observing my friends' progress, the married couple. I don't expect anyone to read this. It will be long as a lot of it is catching up to current times and part of it is a bit of venting that I cannot do anywhere or share with anyone anyone to avoid drama. <3


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Over a year ago I was so happy with riding it was infectious. Eventually L, the wife, decided to join me. And got hooked. She was actually incredibly scared of horses at the start. If they so much as sneezed she screamed at the top of her lungs, in the saddle may I add. I mean, like REALLY screamed for her life. All the horses jumped and the lesson would break out in giggles. When we were trotting in one of her earlier lessons she was in front and the horse tripped - she screamed so loud that my horse and hers did the legs-splayed-fat-pancake-pose. Thinking about it I'm laughing really loud right now. I was crying so hard with laughter I couldn't focus nor see her horse anymore for the tears in my eyes. Really I cannot stop laughing as I type this haha. These veteran school horses must have thought we were absolutely nuts. It actually made the instructor a bit anxious though as she's very safety conscious - fortunately she owns the school and knows every horse inside out and had L on the safest, most chill horse going. 

After a few months she infected her husband, S. He's a man's man! He often likes to say that he takes things "like a man". He and I rub each other the wrong way because he was brought up in a very traditional (read: sexist) way. He is also incredibly racist but subtly so. He hates the English and I actually had to point out that I'm English and not a snob. He didn't like me as I was too opinionated and too honest. I didn't know my place as a woman in the world. In fact he was so sure that if I was a man or a lesbian I would be wooing his wife LOL (his words!). So he and I really had a hard time bonding that was until... horse riding! For the sake of my friend I wanted to develop a friendship with him. I expected him to get on, ride around with 12 year old girls and decide it wasn't for him. *I couldn't have been more wrong.* He is SO competitive. You guys think I'm hard on myself? He takes it to a whole new level that failure is basically not an option. The result? He fails a lot and has a hard time dealing with it. 

So there I am riding with two hardcore city people in utter disbelief at their commitment to horse riding. We all know that people start, don't like the slow progress and quit early. But NOPE. Not these two. The sad thing is they don't drive and rely me 100% to get to their riding lessons. I have been having issues with that since getting Katie (because I want to ride her more) but they have showed such passion for this hobby I actually feel mean saying no. Moral dilemma! Despite recent troubles I'm still very proud of them.

So where are they now? Well, L was always too scared to canter. She was a huge wuss but I can't blame her. It is scary for some people. Her husband was very greedy to canter but L was happy to trot. She's a tiny woman but with a really good, natural seat. Way better than with what I started. S, her husband, has the least secure seat I think I've ever laid eyes on but he was very brave. Unfortunately in canter he is balancing himself on the reins, his bum is a basket balls worth out of the saddle and I cringe really hard watching. When I asked my instructor why she let him canter, it was because he nagged and she has had issues in the past with men in particular who feel they are above their actually skill level. She said that if she didn't let him canter he would just escalate things. In fact I can hear parents complaining that she doesn't let their kid canter because they aren't ready. I didn't realise how much crap instructors get for not rushing things... Even still. I don't think he's ready to canter. Textbook 101. S goes around telling everyone that he's the better rider because he's more brave and that his wife, L, is too scared and not a very good rider _because she can't canter_. He actually says that with us present to other people. His wife is an incredibly sweet woman with a huge amount of patience. She can tolerate a lot more than most people and I've been told to keep my mouth shut to save the peace. So I do. But it amazes me that even after watching a video of his own canter and just because he doesn't fall off he thinks he can canter. He actually said he rides better in hacks - well I hack with him and of course he doesn't ride better but it's not my job to critique him unless he asks so I just let him enjoy nature. It does annoy me, however, that he is so greedy for canter that every time the lead instructor calls for a trot he canters - and always says to me after that he does it intentionally to practice. Unfortunately everyone else thinks that he's crap at controlling his horse so it's not really paying off. I think it's a bit of both. But in other threads I write that he just wants to canter hopefully you understand what I mean. Even in a lesson he tries it on. I don't know what the issue is. 

Anyway... L, after riding Katie for 60 seconds and realising that she's not as good as she was she has completely upped her game. She's desperate to be able to ride Katie, especially after watching me and saying how easy I made it look (ahhhh, don't you love it when an amateur thinks you're the best rider in the world? How much she has to learn haha!) In a different school on an unfamiliar horse she had her first canter and NAILED IT. Her husband did exactly what tinyliny said - he asked for a canter but his whole body rebelled. The mare quickly decided she's not having that and bucked him off. Good for her because I think she was a bit small to have him banging on her back. He did get back on and trotted though - he was visibly shaken and all but crying. He's very very sensitive, hence all the big talk, I've learned. He's so scared of failing and blamed everyone, the horse, the instructor, the helper, ME for taking him to a place with wild horses and for letting his wife get on a wild horse- Katie- with no training (heh)... Through all of this S is petrified of Katie. She's done nothing to him and she's as big as the horse he rides at the school. But he wont even come up to stroke her neck let alone be in her stable. His wife though put Katie's rug on and EVEN PICKED HER FEET FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HER LIFE. These huge dish feet and she did it. I was seriously impressed with her bravery - but partly because she's ignorant at what could go wrong and how badly. I was so ready and positioned to protect her head just in case. And I'll be the first to say it - after L saw how scared her husband of Katie he was she suddenly gained confidence in herself. She walked Katie around and constantly was amazed at how she was able to "control" such a huge beast. And yet he didn't even like being within 100 yards of her.

This week just gone I booked L a group lesson at this new school. Her husband refused to ride there since he got bucked off last time, fair enough and I've since managed to convince him to try a different horse in a PRIVATE lesson. It's closer and I'm hoping that they will travel by public transport and learn by themselves a bit - I need to spend more time with Katie not spending £40 to ride a schoolmaster at intermediate level with them every single week. They are too anxious to ride without me so so don't understand my view fully. Call this a weaning process. 


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_*THE LESSON:*_

Well pants. The instructor that did the assessment didn't actually tell the booking staff where to place them but I made VERY SURE to tell her on the phone that L is intermediate and only cantered once. We helped L onto her pony and she joined the other 3 in the lesson for a warmup. About 5 minutes later I realise something is wrong. There's no instructor and the other ladies REALLY know how to ride. Oh pants. I go inside and ask and they accidentally put L in the super advanced OPEN SCHOOLING SLOT! They have regular riders that enjoy schooling their greener horses. WELP. The instructor, the same one as last time, was on her break but was SO nice and said she'd sit outside and help L through it. The other ladies riding were very kind and very encouraging towards L which was a relief. It was too much for L. *She has never been lead file nor ridden on her own with no one to follow. NEVER.* She doesn't understand open school etiquette but they were really nice and got out of her way haha! She has been such an autopilot follower and its clear she made little effort to retain some of her lessons. She's been told numerously what it is to trot a diagonal for the LAST YEAR by both me and her usual instructor and each time says she's never heard of it. She doesn't know what a circle is, a figure 8 or serpentine. She didn't even understand when she was asked to CHANGE REIN. Part of me is suddenly super embarrassed as I know she's been taught all this as I'VE BEEN IN THE LESSONS WITH HER. 

This lesson was a HUGE HUGE eye opener for her. She said she felt like a beginner. Well YES. BECAUSE YOU'VE JUST FOLLOWED THE HORSE IN FRONT ALL THE TIME! Bah. They never listened to my pleas to have private lessons. Well she knows now because with her newfound confidence she thought she was hot stuff  She was desperate to canter in this lesson but she soon realised how hard it was to get her pony to trot AND steer with no one to follow. Her pony had a spat and a mini rear when she nearly crashed into another rider but was completely unfazed and pushed her pony on. Her husband next to me was panicking massively (giggle). He had to leave for a cigarette. When he returned he mentioned their upcoming private lesson. The instructor said that they shouldn't do it together and have half hour each instead so they can be focused. He said "is that because my wife isn't as good as me and can't canter?" The instructor frowned and without hesitation, "Actually, no, I think you need to be lunged to get your seat down. L has proven herself today. I think you're too nervous to even trot without a helper at the moment." Cue inner meltdown. He immediately left for another cigarette. Cringe cringe cringe. Cringe. He takes stuff really hard and hasn't had a good time recently. His most recent hack at the other school he wouldn't listen to the owner/instructor to stop letting his horse rub his head as THE BRIDLE CAME OFF MID-HACK?!?!?!?!? So he's just been constantly shouted at and put down. At this point I really pity him :'< 

Did I say L is also incredibly soft - really I mean it. Imagine squeezing the hand of a loved one. That's about how hard she squeezes her legs and steers with her reins. That's the sort of squeeze Katie over-reacts to. I'm not saying she should kick but the slow, sleeping cob plod was irritating me just watching haha! We had to pull her aside and explain what a change of rein and figure 8 was. The instructor even told her that most people just want to trot nonstop - and this is her chance to do loads of trotting as she doesn't need to wait her turn. DING DING. Suddenly she was motivated. The little pony kept eyeing up the poles laid out for grid work. The instructor told L to go over them. Oh. my. god. I nearly died it was SO CUTE. This little pony, clearly now doing her own thing, beautifully picked herself up and daintily went over them looking very proud. I want to say it was L's doing but it wasn't. This pony just wanted some fun haha! The poles made it much easier to retain that trot and steer so the lesson ended on a really great note. What was truly beautiful was the way everyone involved, the other riders and us, all cheered her on as if she'd won the Olympics. Everyone was so nice it was really heartwarming. 

After getting off she was super pleased with herself and actually dumbfounded at how hard it was. BUT she managed it! I told her to be proud - she just had the hardest lesson of her life and managed it. She steered her horse in trot while surrounded by better riders cantering around. And guess what? She only wants privates for the next few months. She now understand when I said that group lessons ALONE wont help her learn as fast as she wants. It also can't teach her how to be a real rider and steer or to control her horse. She has a better understanding of what it will take to ride Katie because for some reason that is her main goal after the instructor said, nicely, that she is too novice for her.. we've got a way to go yet! 

As for her husband I feel really bad for him. L doesn't feel so bad as hes gone around telling everyone how he's better and braver - it's actually been a huge confidence boost for her. I don't think he'll give up though. I think this might be a bone of contention between them. But he is so scared to the point he's visibly shaking around horses. In the yard a helper was holding two horses one on each side. They sniffed each other and squealed/reared - y'know, as they can do. No big deal just a firm correction. But S who was standing at least 2 meters away from their heads (he was facing them) lurched back and fell really hard, shoving the mounting block across the yard. Good thing he still had his hat on! They were nowhere near him and as he stood up breathlessly said they tried to attack him. The helper just stared at him as if he was a crazy person and afterwards I explained why the horses reacted as they did. He wasn't convinced. And yet he still says things afterwards about how "he took it on the chin, like a man should. that he's not scared and is more motivated to ride better." When he got off one horse he was over smothering it's face and it shoved him away. He's now scared and wont ride that horse because it "doesn't like him". But he is absolutely, undeniably petrified of horses on the ground. He will ride them... but he will have absolutely nothing to do with them otherwise. I don't see the point in riding then but I guess many people just ride horses like machines... sad. I think a LOT of it, as I've gotten to know him, is about one-upping his wife. He usually, in her words, is smarter than her and better than her in most things. He definitely doesn't consider her opinion valid. But this might be the first hobby in her life that she will outperform him. I wont get involved and I am a bit concerned about how things will unfold. 


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At the end of it all and despite everything I am very proud of them both and how far they have come and their dedication. I'm glad I got this all off my chest. Because come Friday they will have their first ever private lessons FINALLY! L is incredibly motivated now. S... I'm not so sure. He has started to say he might not be able to make it but I really want him to. I want him to know that yes, he has regressed, but he can't give up. He might end up being an amazing rider at the end of it all but will never know if he gives up. Turns out he's a habitual quitter in other things too so I'm really trying to encourage him to keep at it. It would be really nice if he didn't compare himself to his wife and learn to be proud of her instead! He still doesn't see her as the rider she is. Fingers crossed guys. As you get to see me progress it's really nice to be able to watch theirs, too. 


If you read this you're a nutter and if I knew you wouldn't take advantage order a pizza for your procrastinating ways xD <3


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## Acadianartist

Well, I'm a nutter. But I don't think your pizza places will deliver to Canada. 

And I don't like L at all. I am cheering for S all the way! I'd be more worried that L will try to discourage S from pursuing riding. I sure hope that will not be the case. You've been very kind and patient with both of them!


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## tinyliny

I didn't read all, but your description of the lessons reinforces that we ARE from two different countries, even though , to the superficial eye, we speak the same language. I've never had lessons like you describe; with the following in a line and such. So strange to me.


just one quick question . . . are the two you are writing about cool with you doing this?


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## Kalraii

Oh yes those sort of lessons are literally everywhere down south anyway. One school I go to has a max of 6 and another a max of 10. You either all trot together or take turns to go to the back of the line. Same for canter. I find that you have to have more discipline in a group as you are less babied. They can let a lot of things slide too as they are only human.

In regards to them knowing yes they are aware I keep a diary online here specifically it's no secret but did request name censorship when I asked if I could write about their progress, which I'm doing anyway. I even requested the husbands permission before posting the canter thread and showed him the responses. He was up for it! I can't said I would text him "hey here are my uncensored thoughts about everything in its rawest format" but everything that's in the post has already been said with only a smidge of sugar. The wife is definitely fine and in the beginning lurked here. They don't really enjoy browsing the forums tho - much prefer YouTube. They know about my Katie thread but I think I have over horses them with my enthusiasm lol! Once they develop more independence that's when I think we might start seeing them around I hope! It goes without saying if they requested removal or even if you guys do it would be no issue!


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## jaydee

The lesson style is typical for a group lesson in the UK. Riders will either walk/trot/canter together or they'll take turns to go away from the line of horses and trot/canter from the front of the line to the back of the line.
A good instructor should still be able to give individual comments to each rider as needed
Total beginners are usually kept in a small group if they don't want to pay for a private lesson
Some schools can offer lessons in a small group of around 4 max. but if you want more personal 'in depth' tuition you have to pay for a private lesson


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## Kalraii

Update: S, the husband, won't come riding. I'm _gutted_. I really really want him to push through this phase. I think what the instructor said has put him off. But unfortunately the place I usually ride is an hour and half ride away and his favourite place. It's a long way to go and completely in the other direction from Katie. But... I'm going to book him a private there in two weeks as he trusts this instructor and his regular horse far more. For his confidence I think he will be better served by a few lessons there. It's just a downside because I can't go there often and he doesn't drive. 
@Acadianartist my partner is currently studying abroad and orders me pizza through paypal. It CAN be done /wink. But I forget that in the city people actually deliver as well haha! Where he is he can't get any take away...


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## Acadianartist

Kalraii said:


> Update: S, the husband, won't come riding. I'm _gutted_. I really really want him to push through this phase. I think what the instructor said has put him off. But unfortunately the place I usually ride is an hour and half ride away and his favourite place. It's a long way to go and completely in the other direction from Katie. But... I'm going to book him a private there in two weeks as he trusts this instructor and his regular horse far more. For his confidence I think he will be better served by a few lessons there. It's just a downside because I can't go there often and he doesn't drive.
> 
> @*Acadianartist* my partner is currently studying abroad and orders me pizza through paypal. It CAN be done /wink. But I forget that in the city people actually deliver as well haha! Where he is he can't get any take away...


So if I'm understanding correctly, you're providing all the transportation for this couple. That would get old real fast for me. You may want to encourage them to make other arrangements, otherwise it will seriously cut into your horse time too. I realize you're not asking for advice here, but it just seems odd to me. The first few times, I can understand, but they should really be trying to be more independent.

And I don't live in the city.  No pizza deliveries here either! Sweet of your partner to do that though. Some partners send flowers. Mine moves manure piles with his tractor.


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## Kalraii

Acadianartist said:


> So if I'm understanding correctly, you're providing all the transportation for this couple. That would get old real fast for me. You may want to encourage them to make other arrangements, otherwise it will seriously cut into your horse time too.


I totally appreciate the advice. The whole point of me bringing them to this new place (where he is refusing to ride because of one buck) is because it's accessible via public transport. I even meet them by the tube so they aren't getting a lift. I told them that if they want to be good riders they have to ride regularly and that Katie is my priority. When I bought Katie, before he'd even met her, he was already offering me evenings after work he could exercise her for me, for free, may I add. It was sort of sweet the little bubble he lived in, before all this recent disaster. 

Now that has fallen through and he's had a few bad sessions it is turning out impossible to get him to ride anywhere else. I really do love riding at the far school but I can't justify going weekly. I'm starting to get addicted to private lessons with Katie. I'm actually booking a week where I ride 5 days straight! So I'm going to give him a month, like 2-3 lessons at the far place and then upfront tell him that I wont be riding there any more than once a month, that he will have to face his fear and start at the new school for good, for himself. With him, it's actually better when I book in advance and tell him it's done and paid as he's less likely to back out!

So we'll see. L is still going on Friday. A whole hour on her own, for the very first time in her life. An hour. She has no idea how demanding it's going to be compared to what shes used to xD


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## horseluvr2524

I'm really enjoying your journal, though I will admit to mild headaches after so long staring at the computer screen reading your novel! lol! But I really do like your writing, it's so fun to read. Katie is so beautiful and sounds fun. I haven't tried many horses so sensitive. Mostly I ride horses that require a crop/whip to remind them that a leg squeeze isn't just an affectionate leg hug! lol.

I think my friend @gottatrot would really enjoy your journal. She could use a bit of cheer right now.


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## findinghappy

I just binge read this entire journal, I love it!!! Oh and that post about if I read it all I get a pizza. I guess I better go order some, I'm as nutty as they come and I read it all lol.

I do hope things work out for S, but they sound even more exciting for your friend L, and reading about your adventures with Katie is inspiring and fun to read. Keep posting!!


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## Kalraii

horseluvr2524 said:


> I'm really enjoying your journal, though I will admit to mild headaches after so long staring at the computer screen reading your novel!


I write at 110 wpm since I do transcription work as well. I type faster than I can speak so makes it too easy to go absolutely wild oops. Sorry about that! <3 Am glad you and findinghappy enjoy it! It's super refreshing to be able to let rip, so to speak. :smileynotebook:


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## egrogan

I don't understand why you are booking their lessons and handling transport? Are you getting a commission from the barn or fee from them?


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## Kalraii

egrogan said:


> I don't understand why you are booking their lessons and handling transport? Are you getting a commission from the barn or fee from them?


I book the lessons (don't pay for them out of pocket) because around half a year ago they were booking lessons for ME without asking me and the expectation that I would go every Saturday. Thing is, I did ride every week but I liked it to be on my terms so I requested they not book lessons if they are thinking of involving me or expecting a lift without asking. I car share so need to make sure I have it available. My partner is the same as you - "they are grown adults and should be managing their own hobbies" and he's right, too. I have tried several times to get them to ride at other places independent of me but they always want me there to hold their hand, as if it miraculously makes it safer to be on a horse lol. I have upfront told the wife this is my last effort to help find them a riding school they can attend without me. I do want to ride with them - but certainly not every week nor do I want to be guilt tripped into driving/attending when I won't even ride. 

I also really enjoy their company, the lunch meals after and have thrived on watching them progress but I am starting to reach my limit as I really need to focus on Katie.


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## mmshiro

As a guy, I don't get hubby at all. When I started to take lessons, I was aware that my instructor is responsible for my safety and within her right to assess which challenge I can handle next and which I can't. So I never asked my instructor to do anything, and I still got where I am today at a speed that has been satisfactory to me. 

My current instructor - that's a different matter. My first jumping lesson on the trail was her telling me, "You see that log? Just look ahead and grab some mane!" before she took her horse over - mine following, naturally.

Now I'm unsupervised with my horse(s), so taking stupid risks (riding way above my ability rather than carefully working my edge) can cost me or my horse dearly. BO telling me that I can take any of her horses I want, anytime, means a lot to me, and you don't earn that trust by being stupid macho, but by earning a track record of bringing horses home safely and relaxed.


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## Acadianartist

Kalraii said:


> I write at 110 wpm since I do transcription work as well. I type faster than I can speak so makes it too easy to go absolutely wild oops. Sorry about that! <3 Am glad you and findinghappy enjoy it! It's super refreshing to be able to let rip, so to speak. :smileynotebook:


Haha... well, I type pretty fast, but I read way faster (it's a pretty big part of my job). When I was working on my dissertation many moons ago, I remember binge reading 4-5 novels a day for a good part of the summer as I set out to read everything that had been written in my period. So we are a good match! You keep writing, and I'll keep reading! 

Glad to hear you are encouraging this couple to make their own arrangements. It sounds like you have a good handle on it. Doesn't mean you can't still get together for lunch and laugh about your horse adventures together! 

The couple I hang out with takes weekly lessons with the same coach as my daughter, but we never see them because they go at different times. In fact, I miss them! They are co-workers, but we just meet in the hallway going a million miles an hour. I actually invited the wife for a Christmas lunch, and because she kept saying she wishes she had more barn time (she is absolutely obsessed), I brought lunch to the barn. We ate in the aisle, while the horses munched on hay, a rather fancy luncheon, complete with wine. She got a huge kick out of it. I look forward to seeing them again once work settles down, and they have actually been really helpful, pitching in to fence in our new back pasture last summer. So I think it's great to maintain a friendship with your friends, as long as it doesn't mean less time for you and Katie.


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## AnitaAnne

I really am enjoying reading this journal; very refreshing! I type really s.l.o.w. but read really fast so we are a good match 

About your couple friends; they are fortunate to have you assisting them. May I suggest you change their names to W (wife) and H (husband) for clarity? I am sometimes confused which is which...Or maybe L (lady) and M (man) would work? Is L the lady? Or is S the lady? 

Anyway, the female half of the couple sounds like she is determined. She may not have concurred her fear as much as it seems on the outside, as you say she has to be constantly reminded of things like diagonals. She might be riding on the horse thinking "up/down up/down or something and not really focused on what the instructor is actually saying. This would work splendidly in group lessons, not so much in private lessons...

The male half on the other hand sounds a bit scary! Irrational fears, inflated self-worth, and belittles women. Not anyone I would want in my life or around my horses. If he only is willing to ride, does not follow instruction, and wants nothing to do with horses on the ground; well it sounds as if he needs a different hobby. Maybe golf would help his aggression. 

BTW, the beginning rider group lessons I remember from my youth sound just like yours. The instructor would say "trot" and basically all the horses would just do it. We were more or less just passengers. Then at times we would line up and one at a time canter or do some jumps. The horses knew this routine too and were a bit reluctant to start then eager to hurry up and get back to the end of the line 

In the more advanced lessons as a teenager, we would continue to work our horses independently while giving whomever was jumping priority. This was fine except my friend one time cantered her horse right into mine as I was landing from a 3 foot (about one meter) jump and I was on a green four year old that had recently come to the school! I was very angry at her, then the next week she did it again, twice!! :evil: I told her if she couldn't stay out of my way when it was my turn to jump I would not take her to the lessons anymore. She never did it again, TG. I'm not sure she realized the proper school etiquette since it was her first experience with school horses.


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## Kalraii

Thanks guys! 
@mmshiro I hope you don't mind me asking but what is it you do? Are you an instructor now? Trainer? It says you're a Mathematician! xD Am intrigued. I have done some snooping ... sorry about that cute filly - you truly are an amazing person! It is my passion to work with horses but I will be taking a year to just learn on my own. In the UK at least certification is about the ONLY requirement (in London anyway :<). A bit of exaggeration but I have already got stick for my inexperience, age and lack of BHS qualifications. 

Acadianartist - those are the best lunches though I remember only eating lunch in the yard when I was a teenager. I find I don't really click with with the clique crowd, if that makes sense. At my last apprenticeship I got called a snob for preferring to read in my spare time LOL. It must be quite hard to find someone that can ride a similar level to hang out with regularly. That is my wish...

AnitaAnne thanks <3! I will use your versions of W and H. It does make more sense! The lessons are EXACTLY like that. In fact when I have privates at the school the instructor has to say "upward transition" or spell it out "time to C!" as her horses are so well adjusted now haha. Oh man a crash like that... good thing nothing bad happened. I actually was that person when I learned to open school. That was when I learned that my horse had a little TOO much trust in me lol "sure I'll crash into this other horse"... What you said about her maybe still being fearful I'm not 100% sold. Before her husbands buck they would BOTH purposely "race" each other in the middle the lesson to overtake one another with no regard for anyone else or the toddler on the back of the tiniest pony I have ever laid eyes on. It was only when the instructor threatened to ban them, red faced, they stopped these antics. I would then get a dirty look from her that said "why did you bring them here?" lol. Fortunately that ended that. W is afraid of bolting. Strangely enough H enjoys "bolting" as he says. On his first ever private canter hack the instructor came back flustered. He'd apparently gone for a gallop, urging his horse past hers and down the wrong trail. His first "canter" ever. He didn't understand that he was meant to stay behind her. She was stressing pretty hard at his lack of compliance and she didn't enjoy having to race to catch up - she's a small woman on a pony and he was on a 16.3 sports horse. I can imagine that her heart was in her throat and thinking of all the insurance claims to come! But he was completely exhilarated with the biggest grin on his face. A face I miss, really. He's not had much fun at all recently. They eventually learned to behave. I don't know, I think the wife has only begun to understand the difference between passenger and rider. Watching her comprehension has been quite enjoyable! XD

---------------------------

Tomorrow I see Katie. Not going to ride - take her for a really long walk in the morning down the local hack. She gets a bit excited as it's adjacent to her turnout fields and wants to be with her friends. And about halfway she gets anxious. It is my goal to reach the end of that bridleway, dispense some treats and come home. I might have company, maybe. She has ALREADY been hacked out by the manager but I can feel it in myself - not quite ready yet. Not far, but not yet. I'm not worried about her running off with me but that the ground is slippery. With the recent snow (IN LONDON!!!) I just want to be safe as I don't have the control like she does.


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## Kalraii

Update on W (wife): she has only lived in the UK for 5 years. She's actually from South America ... somewhere  So she doesn't get to see her family much as you know tickets are expensive. She just learned that her older sister can ride! Her sister's bf owns a farm and he taught her to ride only a few months ago. W is actually.. jealous. As her sister has "mastered canter" in the videos/pictures sent. I am not allowed to share them, which is fair. The saddle looks like an English seat with western straps/stirrups. No hand pommel(if that's what it's called) or I once saw someone on here call it an "oh crap handle" which I love. The "blanket" is shaped like numnah but thicker. It looks like a hybrid thingy? Very cool. Well, if you thought W was motivated before... watch out now. She has also asked me to not mention or book riding to her husband as he's not very receptive about it. Uh oh.


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## celestejasper13

@Kalraii how is your yard dealing with the 'Beast from the East'? We have no water at all today as all the pipes are frozen so we're making trips to a friend's house in her car to fill up water tanks. Crazy how weather that would be considered mild for most on this forum sends our infrastructure into meltdown!


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> Thanks guys!
> @mmshiro I hope you don't mind me asking but what is it you do? Are you an instructor now? Trainer? It says you're a Mathematician! xD Am intrigued. I have done some snooping ... sorry about that cute filly - you truly are an amazing person! It is my passion to work with horses but I will be taking a year to just learn on my own. In the UK at least certification is about the ONLY requirement (in London anyway :<). A bit of exaggeration but I have already got stick for my inexperience, age and lack of BHS qualifications.


I do have a PhD in math, and I teach math at a fancy boarding school in New England. My horse _training_ skills are limited to assisting in the training of a horse under guidance of someone who can tell me and observe what to do - basically what you do, from what I gather from your description of your horse. I have been entrusted with taking tourists on the trail, but that's more scary than riding. I much prefer riding "backup" when there is a need. (My BO calls it "moral support" - I basically add a calm horse and rider to the group.)

Working with horses is potentially something that'd intrigue me as a retirement option - even if it's just for some booze money. There are many horse farms around here, and the University of CT has an equine program, so maybe with enough experience, enough people knowing how I ride and interact with horses, and a few college courses on the side, I can find something, even if it's just at the break-even point for the cost of riding.


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## tinyliny

celestejasper13 said:


> @*Kalraii* how is your yard dealing with the 'Beast from the East'? We have no water at all today as
> 
> \all the pipes are frozen so we're making trips to a friend's house in her car to fill up water tanks. Crazy how weather that would be considered mild for most on this forum sends our infrastructure into meltdown!


Beast from the East?? sorry, asking from West Coast of US. East for us is continental US, . . then you all!


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## Kalraii

Yup! @celestejasper13 Our pipes froze and I'm in the city. No hot water for me yay. I dread the yards for their frozen water :,( This is what the park looks like near me... pathetic example of snow! But believe it or not on the other side of the hedge was not one but TWO pile ups. Could hear them shouting haha. Last night I woke up to a huge bang and horn - called the police as I ran in my pjs to them. I live next to an arterial road with a nasty junction. I regularly call police and ambulance each month. Just last month I had to scream at some men to NOT pull a bus driver out of his seat following a head on collision. City life... pls. Someone get me out?

So the collie cross is 16 and called Steve. When he was young, around 5, he completely snapped the ligament in his right leg. Between steroids and NO exercise he got fat. He has been on thyroid medication for most of his life as well to keep it UP. His other half is lab. Surprise anyone? The glutton.

Pink jacket is Gypsy. We found her down the road. She's est 5. When we rang the owner on her chip they were breeders from Wales. Had come down to sell off her pups and she escaped the van. The woman said "She's done anyway so we didn't bother to look for her, You can have her.' WOW. O.K. So we did.

Honey, the honey coloured Alsatian, was bought for a heft few thousand pounds from Bulgaria. The owners (of very typical Indian descent... I don't mean this rudely. It is very typical around this area...) wanted her for a guard dog. But they spent a year of her upbringing using a gas horn and electric collar to stop her barking when visitors came to the door. They got burgled and since she didn't "tell them" wanted rid of her asap. So I took her. It has taken me the better part of a year to give her the confidence to bark. It is a fearful booming sound that shocked me the first I heard it haha. I used to train bomb dogs, not police dogs. But she'd be crap for both. She makes an excellent sensory dog, the type that gets help or warns someone of an upcoming seizure. Let's me know when Steve needs a wee in the middle of the night by trying to tongue my throat /puke.


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## Kalraii

@tinyliny on the news they are referring to our city snowstorm as "The Beast" LOL. It actually cracks me up.


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## Acadianartist

So first, those dogs are adorable! I have two long-haired dachshunds. We got the first as a pup, but the second is a rescue (our second one, after we lost our last rescue last summer). 

Secondly, could your friend's sister have been riding in an Australian saddle? It looks like a mix between English and Western. Some have horns, some do not. I ride in one for trail riding (minus the horn). 

And finally, yes, I had to chuckle a little at your "Beast" given that I live in Eastern Canada. But I get it, unexpected weather in any part of the world is a challenge. Here, a milder winter than normal has been a headache. We have had lots of snow, but it's been intermixed with warmer periods which means freeze-thaw all winter long, ending in a paddock that looks like a skating rink. I'm so, so tired of it. I don't mind snow (it's lovely to ride in when it's packed down, a lot like riding in sand), but I hate this ice.


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## Kalraii

Acadianartist said:


> So first, those dogs are adorable! I have two long-haired dachshunds.


How do you not lose your sausages in the snow? My goodness! And YES you are so right - it looks way closer to an Australian saddle. I falsely assumed they used plain English saddles too. Though I spose it makes no sense as they often live the ranch life too? I would love the snow you get. Not this pooh in-between!


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## celestejasper13

Down this way it's much the same - I live split between Camden and Lewisham... The forum helps put it in to perspective when I'm complaining about the weather! And I'm sure the people near me use any excuse to cause trouble...current issue is with moped gangs in balaclavas :/ @tinyliny the storm is supposedly some Siberian snowstorm, we're recommended to be home by 6pm for our safety... it's all well and good feeling sorry for ourselves until I log into here and see what you all are dealing with! We have maybe 5cm of snow and temperatures of around -2 celcius


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## tinyliny

where I live, winter temps are very mild , due to the Pacific Ocean's influence. Folks here are very wimpy when it comes to REAL weather. So, I get your experience with people over reacting to a 'storm'. I mean, they'll call it 'the storm of the century", when it's just a wee little wind or snow storm.


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## Acadianartist

Kalraii said:


> How do you not lose your sausages in the snow? My goodness! And YES you are so right - it looks way closer to an Australian saddle. I falsely assumed they used plain English saddles too. Though I spose it makes no sense as they often live the ranch life too? I would love the snow you get. Not this pooh in-between!


Haha... well, in fact, the first thing I have to do after a snowfall is shovel off the front deck so they can get out in the morning. Their stubby little legs don't give them much clearance! At the moment though, there's a hard crust, so they easily run around on top of the snow. We still have about 3-4 feet of snow on the ground, but that's nothing compared to previous years. This is quite an early spring for us, and we've been having really warm (above freezing) weather lately. 

Three winters ago we got a total snowfall of 18 feet. Not all at once, of course, but over the entire winter. It was harsh, and at any given time, we had 4-5 feet on the ground. We couldn't live without my husband's tractor with the snowblower attachment. He's nice enough to clear the snow out of my paddock for me when we get a lot of snow. And because he stores his tractor in the equipment bay we built into the front part of our barn, he also clears a nice, 6' path from the barn to the house. It makes my life a lot easier! I'm probably not supposed to post pics on someone else's journal, but just to put things in perspectives, here is a pictures from February of last year. We do have a bit less snow this year than what you see in this picture. It's really not as bad as it seems, since we're quite used to it, and use it to our advantage. Snow is an excellent insulator, for example. And I prefer it to rainy, wet cold.


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## Kalraii

*Blows nose*

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY???????????????????????

WHY DOES IT HAVE TO SNOW? Don't they know the crappot of a public system in London not just fails, but returns to the primitive ice-age in these conditions? It is preventing me from seeing my horse! It is already a 2 hour journey and I can't get there not because I can't navigate the ice and snow but because *all the other drivers bloody well can't!* Don't even get me started on the tube. I mean how hard is it to maintain a track in a tunnel? In a TUNNEL?! A SINGLE TRACK? Pffft. To say I'm upset is an understatement.

I've also come down with a stinking cold and deep chested cough - probably off one of the many patients I've interacted with in the last week. I've probably severely compromised a few too :'< I met some neighbours bratty kids today and an evil part of me wished it upon them! (Not really, I'm just being a typical "mare" lol).

BUT, I have some other good and bad news. Since I cannot update on Katie other than that the yard manager is ensuring she is receiving many hugs, I was able to watch a video of the Wife's lesson yesterday. Apparently they had cancelled all the lessons but never rang her but she turned up just after the school had been harrowed so they said they'd give her a half hour lesson. _*Her husband didn't go in the end.*_ She honestly has greatly improved in just two privates. For the first time EVER she had a forward trot and experienced the joy of not having to do the "constipated begging pose" as I like to call it. Y'know when you meekly "beg" them to go forward but your body screams no? yeah, that was her default previously (she knows I call it that <3). Is ready to canter according to the instructor but said, and I quote, "she hasn't been ridden in 4 days so is too unfit to canter". Someone please correct me on this, but uh, that can't be an excuse surely? It has to be a cover up for "try to canter her and she'll buck you, she's too fresh?" This pony we have watched do some amazing flatwork and jumping literally last weekend. She's a sweet little cob thing with a kind eye and you can just see - she looks after her rider. You just know when you know, innit? A match made in heaven!

So, because I am a nice friend, I have put together a simple little email detailing some basic schooling shapes to help prepare her for the NEXT. TEN. PRIVATES. Oh boy, she's really got the bug now guys xD Her goal is to jump, specifically in gallop, for some odd reason. Good luck finding someone to let her do that but I won't pop that balloon yet! But jump soon she will, by the looks. Our chat also revealed that her husband is VERY sour about riding now and is very upset that she has surpassed him. He is also unhappy that she is dedicating time and money to a hobby that isn't "couple" friendly (he basically wants her to quit since he has). But, by the fact she's gone and booked future lessons, is determined to not let this go. I feel slightly bad about the situation so will, at a much later date, urge him to have private lessons without us - in case he's worried about us watching and judging. If he wants to keep his skill level and worries between him and his instructor I completely encourage that. But she is dreading the future arguments this will cause. Sigh :'<


------------------------------------


So. I'm stuck. So I've been looking at lunge ropes for Katie. And thinking about in the next few weeks stockpiling a first aid kit. I still need to buy shampoo etc but didn't bother since the weather has been so crap figured she'll survive with some leg washing and some good combing only. Still no signs of mud fever and the manager has been checking for me. We still haven't used any products on her just good old fashioned immune system and night stalling. The frozen, pitted clay ground was too dangerous to go frolicking in so she's had school turnout. About the time she needs my attention the most I can't even get there. Hrumph. 

I've also been looking at fancy clips you can do but I mean dirty grey on "white"....? Will think that out as it grows in. She has a fantastic tail to braid I look forward to that when I wont get gangrene digits. Her mane is fairly thin, short and frizzy with about 30cm missing in the middle. As in its: MANE MANE MANE NECK NECK MANE MANE MANE. Does anyone just braid for fun... even practice? I won't obviously be doing any shows or anything this year (if ever) so it sort of feels pointless to spend all those hours just to go on a hack "down the road, bruh". Sorry, I'm woozy from the cough medicine. 

ALSO... clicker training. I will give it a go, I think. The manager does clicker training and I think she would rather enjoy my request to maybe do 15minutes a day when I'm not there. She is already experienced in clicker training. It is sad I wont be able to take most of the credit but I mean, life right? Can't lie in my cake and eat it, forget the phrase but you know what I mean? LOL. I'm sure that's wrong.... 

I was also thinking if Foxhunter and I have ever met by accident if ever and how cool would that be?! I could get an autograph?! Also, if ever anyone visits London for a holiday or lives nearby HIT ME UP MAN! Come, meet Katie, show me how it's done or... not. If you're not English I'll acquaint you in the most obnoxious way with crumpets, tea, queuing and Eastenders. ^<^ 

Also, anyone's thoughts on side saddle?

Much love, as always <3


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## Kalraii

@Acadianartist please, permission granted here anyway! I love being show what amazing lives people lead elsewhere. I would absolutely love it anyone wants to share pictures here too. I'll still keep journal-ling but it'd be really boring if it was just my life's work. I don't even want to word count it lol! From what I remember don't your horses have 24/7 turnout? Is that including the snow as well? At what point would you say you need to knit them some frog warmers?

Exactly @tinyliny. London is losing massive profit right now. I watched a poor old lady slip and fall. I have witnessed more car accidents in the last week than in the last 5 years alone. Some nasty ones too. And people, good old fashioned ordinary people with BRAINS are dying to hypothermia. Just yesterday a woman died on her way to work as she didn't dress properly (as per the news). What is going on?!?!?! @celestejasper13 AND THE SNOW CONTINUES! Are you riding out in it? Or has everything screamed to a stop in your area too? 

ps. I'm trying desperately to keep any response that isn't in my journal (aka rant) down to a minimum. It is so hard.


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## tinyliny

one of these days, I swear, I'm jumping the pond for a visit, to Foxy and other HF Brits there. I have spent a couple of weeks in London, years ago, and of course loved it. But, I'd like to see more of the countryside further out. like a MONTH traveling all around would be so cool! If, and when, that happens, i'll put out a call for folks there willing to show me around. 


The other thing I feel ever so slightly like it needs saying, even though this IS YOUR journal, is that I feel trouble on the horizon with this couple, and worry that just about the time you think you are in good with them, and being all helpful and sorts, that things will go south, and who will be in the middle? 

take care when dealing as an outsider with a married couple. just, go easy and keep an eye on the exit.


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## Kalraii

@tinyliny it is my wish to also cross the pond and I know it's early days but if anyone was willing I'd LOVE to meet up and get to know the culture out there. My partner and I are planning a year to "tour" the states. Just... America is so BIG. I'm from UK, he's from Switzerland. We're from baby countries haha! I cannot even tell you how gagging I am to learn western as well. A bit greedy as I have my hands full at the moment haha

edit: OK, I am so grateful for your unintended motivation to find a western facility. I found one! It's purely only western, an hours drive away. Oh the people who run it are AQHA and WES professionals, if that means anything? WHAT IS THIS, DRESSAGE FOR WESTERN? Well I know where I'll be ringing tomorrow! Dammit guys! I can barely ride English!

edit2: because I got too excited and forgot about the second part of your comment. I know I'm terrible for editing. I am absolutely staying out of it eek. I think that she has the bug too strong though and that I'd be able to do anything anyway. At this point she doesn't even need me for a lift which is great for me and takes me out of the equation!


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## tinyliny

well, if you plan to come to the West Coast, you'll want to visit Seattle. It's a boom town, and quite the 'in' place these days. Starbucks, Boeing, Microsoft, Blue Origin, Amazon . . all got there starts here.


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> ALSO... clicker training. I will give it a go, I think.


And here I was watching a video on that exact topic just yesterday: 

Giving an Eye Medication with Positive Reinforcement | CRK Training LLC


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## egrogan

Kalraii said:


> Also, if ever anyone visits London for a holiday or lives nearby HIT ME UP MAN! Come, meet Katie, show me how it's done or... not. If you're not English I'll acquaint you in the most obnoxious way with crumpets, tea, queuing and Eastenders. ^<^


Oh man, wish you had been here a couple of years ago @*Kalraii* - I actually had a great opportunity to go to London on a work trip and was so lucky to go on a hack through Wimbeldon Park. I wrote a little post about it on the forum, but unfortunately the pictures are no longer visible because of the stupid Photobucket scandal, so I'm posting a couple of my favorites here. 




































PS- if you do come stateside, would love to take you out riding through the New England countryside. We're about 2 hours from Boston.


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## celestejasper13

We're still holding lessons at my yard because we have an indoor school but most of our customers have cancelled. I'm actually currently in Devon helping lambing so I have now have very little sympathy for my friends in the little sprinkling London had :') Trying to lamb a sheep in a 6ft snow drift is no fun, and I'll probably be stuck here for a while considering the appalling state of public transport in the UK right now! Sorry to here you haven't been able to reach Katie, the perks of being 10 min walk away from my yard really show up in times like this


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## JoBlueQuarter

I feel for you, @Kalraii! We're in the middle of a big blizzard ourselves, and even though we're used to it, it still sucks.  About the turnout: my horses are outside 24/7 (mostly because I don't board and we don't have a barn). They have a good shelter for extreme weather conditions, but they're like our dogs; they like the cold and snow, to a certain extent.


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## Kalraii

Ah thank you for the pictures @egrogan! - yes, big shame I wasn't around then! I volunteered there for a bit, only a few weeks. I considered keeping Katie there but turnout... yeah. It is my biggest upset, actually. I think if I could be there every day and had a solid few hours to take her out I would. But it's just not the same as galloping across a field naked. Katie that is, without tack I mean haha. Argh. Well me coming stateside is 100% happening at some point xD They are usually very good, like any professional, at knowing who knows their stuff so I'm super glad you got more than just a walk around on a lead rein! I think though if you or anyone else come over you HAVE to go and hack out in Hampshire. It's only about hour, hour and a half most by train out of the city. THAT is real English countryside <3 Wimbledon and Richmond are amazing. We are lucky to have them protected and be allowed to ride there. Did anything stand out to you that was crazy different to back home?

And @celestejasper13 blimey, what a life to introduce a fresh wet lamb to shelter or not haha! Ugh I would love a 10 minute walk. It's so bad I'm considering moving closer!

@JoBlueQuarter how often does it actually snow where you are? Do you get ANY sun lol? I'd be a bit scared hacking out in the snow!

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Well good news is the snow has melted. I'm still sick though. But... I get to see Katie tomorrow! I have had to buy her a new girth as her 52" was too small. I was told bloating was a myth well let me tell you - I go from needing help getting one buckle on to having up to 5 holes free once she's deflated herself (and yes I walk her around and she deflates, only to suck it in again once stopped). And she legit looks at me as I'm trying to do it up - you can see the cogs turning and almost hear the giggle. I don't blame her some people might have been really yanking it so I got a humane one so I can work one buckle at a time without it cinching her. I need get a picture of the "look" she gives when she's directing her thoughts DIRECTLY at me. It's actually a bit disconcerting! 

I won't ride her as I honestly cannot be bummed. I just want to hang out with her and share my sniffles. I will begin my click training tomorrow as well @mmshiro let me know how yours turns out xD I've watched that video thank you <3 I like CRK she's very sensible!


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## JoBlueQuarter

Kalraii said:


> @JoBlueQuarter how often does it actually snow where you are? Do you get ANY sun lol? I'd be a bit scared hacking out in the snow!


Erm, it's not exactly regular but it snows usually at least once a week, sometimes every day for a one week streak. And yeah, we do get sun. It's really beautiful at times when the sun is out in full force and it's snowing.  So am I, but I'm more scared of the treacherous ice that can be hidden under the snow.


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## horseluvr2524

Yay for Katie time! Oh and do be careful, I can't believe the trouble London is in over a little snow! Sounds like the desert dwellers when we get rain. They drive like bats out of hell when its dry, but pour a little bit of water and they all drive like grandma. lol!


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## Acadianartist

To answer your question, yes, my horses are out 24/7, but their stall doors are always open, so they decide when to come in and when to go outside. I've only closed them a few times this winter, either because of extreme cold at night or because it was snowing hard and the snow would sometimes drift into the stalls. 

They do fine, but I baby Harley a little more than Kodak because the cold bothers him more. Not the snow though, just the cold. He gets blanketed all winter, sometimes double-blanketed, and has a neck warmer. His legs grow a pretty thick coat so he looks like a shaggy pony in the winter. 

Sorry to hear about your cold! Hope you feel better. I LOVE clicker training my mare. They love it too, it gets their brains working, and is a great way to teach little things like a head-down cue, even teaching them to put their nose in the halter. It's really a fun thing to do.


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## Fimargue

Kalraii said:


> I need get a picture of the "look" she gives when she's directing her thoughts DIRECTLY at me. It's actually a bit disconcerting!


Oh I so know that stare, alright - it's the mare glare lol. Talila masters it at times. One gelding, a TB, who before was a riding school horse, used to do a perfect mare glare when I was doing his girth. He would still give me some evil eyeballs after he realised it would not hurt. Finally it was just a a very quick stink eye out of habit.

You said that you would maybe like to get a western horse next. We have loads here. One stud in the south of Brittany does western trained Curly Horses, they speak english as well, and the Quarter Horses and Paints are everywhere. I can come shopping with you. :wink:

If you feel like coming for a vacation in France - I'm half an hour from Mont Saint Michel, but maybe soon in Normandy if I get a job there, and come to ride Arabs and learn some classical dressage. I mean, I'm no instructor, or dressage pro by all means, but I like to talk about it. And horses in general. Right now I school in the beach, but maybe soon enough I have them in a facility with an arena.

Though the beach makes nicer photos


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## egrogan

Kalraii said:


> I think though if you or anyone else come over you HAVE to go and hack out in Hampshire. It's only about hour, hour and a half most by train out of the city. THAT is real English countryside <3 Wimbledon and Richmond are amazing. We are lucky to have them protected and be allowed to ride there. Did anything stand out to you that was crazy different to back home?


Would be funny if I got to take you out hacking through the _New _Hampshire countryside, which is where I live :wink:

The stabling situation definitely seemed the biggest difference. Like I said, all the horses seemed in good spirits and good shape, but it still seemed like it would be a hard life for a horse.

Another difference is that all the traffic and pedestrians seemed totally comfortable with horses on the road. I ride on the roads here a lot, and people are polite, but often seem totally confused and unsure of what to do when they are in a car near a horse. As we rode from the stables to the park, it was just not a big deal for anyone which I liked.


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## Acadianartist

@Fimargue, I am dying of envy!!!


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## Fimargue

Acadianartist said:


> @Fimargue, I am dying of envy!!!


The beach is nice, but instead of riding 2 km to go and back, would be nice to just have a space to do flatwork right next to the field. I envy that right now.


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## Kalraii

I haven't had a chance yet to sit at my computer and give a proper update. I struggle to use my phone for stuff like this  I am on my way home and just wanted to upload these pictures before I write!

Ps Katie got a bit fat from last week I think!


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## Kalraii

I am the worst at taking pictures honestly. I am one of those that puts the mobile out of sight and then it's definitely out of mind!
@egrogan good to hear a positive experience hack wise. In some of the less wealthy areas, however, we often get roasted by pedestrians and motorists. I actually find the city safer to hack out as things are slower anyway and drivers more away. The worst for me are countryside hills and bends as you're guaranteed a nutcase. 
@Fimargue that is. amazing. I actually had a good think after your response. I really think I'm greedy. I want beach, countryside and a school LOL. Oh an indoor one. Absolutely might take you up on your offer. My partner is Swiss so I'm always flying that ways! I am actually already dying to try Western. I know I'll come over and have a look for sure thanks for letting me know. I have to keep reminding myself "enough on my plate" phew. I have never ridden an Arab. Closest thing to that hot is a dutch warmblood and a crazy ottb. I think though that Katie will help with that transition. Once I've got comfortable with her I'm sure I could progress to something more. I look forward to it. It must be great to go galloping down the shoreline. Eurgh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

-----------------------------

So time for the update. 

It has been hard with work and obviously the snow last week. I ended up unable to see Katie originally but did tonight! It feels like it's been months. So much to share from a small visit, as always!

Firstly, I went quite late. It was with the intention to see how she was being kept. I normally arrived after she's been brought in so I'm the one to groom her, pick her feet and rug her. There were times I turned up and they were already doing it or offered to. Picking feet and rug changing is part of the service. They had been rinsing her legs too. Still, it came as no surprise that when I turned up in the EVENING, after staff left for home, that she was still in her turnout rug and her feet were crammed with stones and wet mud. Now I'm not saying Katie will die. But surely, with it being England weather and all and loads of foot problems going around it would be worth picking them just to air them out? Surely this weather demands better husbandry? I could write paragraphs about short-cutting and so on but for now I'll leave it as it is and just observe. Anyway, on her front left sole (from the same perspective as if you were picking it) 1cm to the right of the frog there is a rounded section about 3cm in diameter. It's not soft or squishy but it's distinctive from the rest of her sole. I increased pressure on it and she wasn't worried. I'm very used to looking after abscesses and other deep tissue wounds so will be getting more eyes on it and escalating potentially. It could just be it's uneven but I'm still firmly wearing my "new horse syndrome Katie tinted glasses". She was a bit sensitive in the grooves either side of her frog as well. I've seen a LOT of thrush and she didn't look thrushy. Yet. Yet? Blurgh. -.-


Anyway. I would say that Katie was a little depressed, actually, on arrival. I know she has been ridden and lunged once last week. Only an hour turn out in the school when it snowed. She's probably been utterly bored out of her mind. Her hay was nearly gone by the time I turned up so it was good to know. She isn't a pig eater but I wouldn't blame her if it was a boredom thing. So I might actually have half her evening hay put in a net. She took a while to "wake up" that someone was there to see her, which was sad. But not 10 seconds after my initial hello she was pawing the ground for me to come back (I was only next door in her tack room!). Bad habit and I told her NO but was inwardly flattered because who doesn't like a bit of anthropomorphism? 

The indoor school was being used so instead I took her for a walk around the floodlit property. It's a nice temperature now, just how I like it. Cool but warm enough that a single layer does it. She probably hasn't had her rug taken off in a while so I let her get a good airing while I hand grazed her on one of the banks. Hearing dogs bark and traffic in the distance. Foxes abusing one another. Or cats. Or abandoned babies. Can't tell. A nice view of the city night lights (we're on a hill). We walked around the outdoor school - can't let her off as the fence isn't high enough for her. I don't think she'd jump but I'd rather not risk it as this particular school is close to the driveway on a busy road. We probably spent 10 minutes standing in one spot looking off into the distance. We then learned about the clicker and carrots. I actually hate carrots so this is a mutually beneficial relationship! 

I took her back to her stable and she didn't want to go in. She paused behind me but I asked her nicely to come and she did a really big sigh and entered. For the next hour I groomed her from head to toe. Not a great job but there was a LOT of mud. I would say this is the first time she has properly shown interest or been so expressive when bring groomed. The other times she has been relaxed but not really engaged. Tonight she was with me and not in the land of farts. She loved it. She doesn't have one spot. She has about 12... I lost count. She loves both hands on her withers, all up her neck, her poll, her belly, her chest, her arm/leg pits, her cheeks?!! Her rug was over the door and she spent most of the session grooming it LOL. Just the side swipe, no biting. I wouldn't want her to chew her rug! Her coat is getting thick and she's begun to shed. I also made a point of grooming her ears thoroughly and checking inside. I carefully rubbed around her eyes and had a good look at her teeth and even in her mouth (the latter only for a bit, will progress with time). I felt around her teats - she was a bit cautious at first and then soon relaxed. I want to know that if something happens that everywhere is a green zone! She probably got the best currying she's had since she got here. While I was doing her back leg she shifted weight. Ignored it. Again. Huh? Visibly wobbled. Look up to see her head dipping down and she did a stumble on the spot. She was alert after that though haha but I was like ...holy. Did I just put my horse to sleep?!!! I have always said that I love horses more than for the riding but today cemented that fact. If tomorrow I was told Katie could never be ridden again for the rest of her days I will still be happy to have her. It was a nice realisation. 

Speaking of riding. I'm riding her on Thursday. She's gonna be FRESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. :falloff:

I'm going to spend half the ride BEHIND her, not on top haha. Anyway, I'm still unbalanced for her bounce and pace, and she's still green. I really want to get to the point where we have a relationship in the saddle the same way we're developing it on the ground but right now neither of us have the answers or even know the correct questions to ask XD 


*Her Bridle*

The noseband is rubbing a LOT, going by the worn leather already. Her nose is fine though but she doesn't wear it often enough to chafe her skin visibly. I am considering using the dressage bridle instead - I mean, I don't really care that its dressage specifically but it has some really nice padding on it. What do you think? I'm not exactly going to show her and by the time I do, if I do, I'll just buy another. I guess she still needs the noseband for her current level of schooling otherwise I'd consider taking it off completely. She doesn't use any gadgets like a flash or martingale at all and isn't really mouthy/evasive. 

I'm so tired guys. I smell of horse - I rather enjoying stinking people out of the seats next to me on the train  Have a good evening/morning <3


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## findinghappy

I really truly enjoyed reading that, almost as much as it sounds like you enjoyed spending time with Katie! Minus the possible hoof issues that is. She sounds so lovely, and happy, you sound happy and stinky, ha!! I hope you both have a great evening. 😁


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## Golden Horse

Hey, I’m all caught up, how did I not see this before....love your journal, So looking forward to following your journey, you have a great attitude, and some fantastic sounding back up, all is going to be well.


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## Acadianartist

Just read your post about brushing and hand-walking Katie. That's what it's all about! Bonding! You two will be bffs in no time! Love it.


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## Fimargue

Kalraii said:


> @Fimargue that is. amazing. I actually had a good think after your response. I really think I'm greedy. I want beach, countryside and a school LOL. Oh an indoor one. Absolutely might take you up on your offer. My partner is Swiss so I'm always flying that ways! I am actually already dying to try Western. I know I'll come over and have a look for sure thanks for letting me know. I have to keep reminding myself "enough on my plate" phew. I have never ridden an Arab. Closest thing to that hot is a dutch warmblood and a crazy ottb. I think though that Katie will help with that transition. Once I've got comfortable with her I'm sure I could progress to something more. I look forward to it. It must be great to go galloping down the shoreline. Eurgh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I would be very happy to have you here.  You seem like a really fun person and I really need some fun in my life!

Mine are not actually hot in the actual sense - ok, Rafalca is a little bit now that she is getting fitter, but it is absolutely not obvious when I'm schooling them.

See here:





This is probably Rafi's 14th time of being ridden, I don't know, have lost count. Her only evading technique is going, and leg yielding lol, backwards. She is still weak and has hard time bending to the right. Both of my horses are left sided.






They are performance horses, in the sense that you have to be present and ride them when we are out and about, but they are also good as gold, honest and with you. Really fun to ride if you like sensitive horses.

Dutch Warmbloods are often sharper than Arabs. See I like them, but they are different. Thoroughbreds are often more anxious than Arabs. My second favorite breed.

You're going to be just fine when the time comes! :wink: 



Kalraii said:


> *Her Bridle*
> 
> The noseband is rubbing a LOT, going by the worn leather already. Her nose is fine though but she doesn't wear it often enough to chafe her skin visibly. I am considering using the dressage bridle instead - I mean, I don't really care that its dressage specifically but it has some really nice padding on it. What do you think? I'm not exactly going to show her and by the time I do, if I do, I'll just buy another. I guess she still needs the noseband for her current level of schooling otherwise I'd consider taking it off completely. She doesn't use any gadgets like a flash or martingale at all and isn't really mouthy/evasive.


Actually the noseband should have nothing to do with the training level as it should never be enough tight to affect opening the mouth. Mine is there just for the looks. 

But yes, you should get the bridle if the padding looks nice for Katie. 

She btw has a very Lusitano type of head look in that first photo.

I would like to see more photos of Katie outdoors.  She has such a kind eye!


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## Acadianartist

I agree with @Fimargue, not all Arabs are hot. I took my first real riding lessons on my coach's Arab (not a lesson horse, she only allowed me to ride her), and she was awesome. My daughter's horse Harley is an Arab. He can be quite forward, but I've seen worse. And he is amazingly smart and responsive, my daughter loves riding him - she is at a riding camp for the week right now, and is complaining about the horses there who are either too slow, or out of control. 

Kodak is a QH. They're supposed to be dead quiet and sensible. Clearly, she didn't read the breed description. Of the two, Harley is far easier to ride than Kodak. He's forward, but never unpredictable.


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## Kalraii

OOF - where to start? I've been busy spending time with my BF. I got one hour sleep so I am DYING. In fact, my brain has been so fried I've sort of lost track of everything and only had time to post a question or answer another :< 

@Fimargue I watched the videos and I love them! You look great! I have actually been stuck in quicksand and a few bogs in my time while hiking so it definitely would give me a little anxiety about beach going though it is on my to-do list. I've heard great things about feathers and salt water  Forgive me if I'm wrong but I thought the nose band was to just help stabilise everything but I suppose you're correct in that (even if it did) it's not applicable to her as she's not one to chew or evade regardless. But her nose has been fine, not sensitive and no sore. I guess the nose band will probably not last a year though >.<

@Acadianartist I suppose you're right - Katie is forward and sensitive but hot is not the word for her.

@Golden Horse thank you so much for your support - I have been trying to stay on top of everyone's journals as well as there is so much to be learned from a first person perspective <3


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So I have visited Katie a few times since my last post, mainly to hand walk and groom. I introduced her to the clicker. I have ordered more haynets and will be preparing them myself so the staff can hang them up for dinner. She always had access to hay and wasn't a fast or piggy eater. But by the time I've gotten there at 6pm her hay is all gone. She's only brought in at 4 and her last feed is at 5pm with her morning feed at 9am. Haynet time! I'm seriously considering purchasing a camera so I can film her for a week Acadian style!  I contacted the company about the analysis - they said the results have been sent ages ago and I got quite irrationally angry at them (tired). They will send out another copy as I am certain I do not have it. Often our mail gets posted to another house -.- 

Her Hooves: I thought there might have been an abscess but it has been monitored carefully - there is quite literally NOTHING indicating otherwise and the farrier is out in a few days. Both manager and instructor were not concerned. She is also quite clumsy and trips more often than I like under saddle so I will be having a word with the farrier about that and in a few days will post her feet because I'm paranoid. She might be clumsy and her demeanour during said stumbles point to inattention too but let's rule everything out. We know her xrays were great at least!

As we all know horse training is always a work in progress and as a new, inexperienced owner I'll continue to address things as they pop up.



*Some thoughts on confidence...*

I've been musing a lot recently. My bf calls it pmsing. Maybe it's just a down moment IDK. Maybe it's coz I am really tired these last few days. 0,0. My training animals was rather specialised with exotics. So it was and still is harder for people to compare or judge me. I couldn't really compare myself that much either as there was only a small pool of people to observe and learn from. If it worked it worked. If it didn't, you tried another approach. If you got bit through your nose you just put a plaster on it and tried again. But not with horses. Everyone is either an expert or an "expert". You are judged and labelled for the things you do and the questions you ask. I am now in the position of client and not trainer. Everyone else, including Katie, is my trainer. It is a fine line between asking for advice and permission and right now I don't know which side I'm on. You know I did spend a few years trying to get into horses - like REALLY get into the industry. But it is highly guarded territory. You can't do X with a horse because you don't know how and yet no one will show you. Or you're treated like a slave. Or the 13 year old is allowed to prepare feeds by reading off a list but a 26 year old can't because she never owned a horse (and clearly doesn't know how to read)? True story. I even considered paying to spend a year with a trainer but y'nkow at my age with my responsibilities it's not an option. In the city, the horse life you want isn't easily attainable. It's actually my biggest childhood regret. So I had no choice but to get a horse as inexperienced as I am because no one was actually willing to take the time of day to teach me anything beyond how to poo pick a field. I am without a doubt my harshest critic. 

I had a really great ride yesterday - the best yet on Katie. She's like a different horse. The training and handling she's received has done wonders for her own confidence. She's starting to become a bit lazy, actually. Lazy to the point she needed me to give her a small whack with the reins to remind her what a canter is. When I mean small whack I mean a tiny whoosh on her shoulder. She LURCHED forward. It really doesn't take much to motivate but in fairness I was knackered from being up all night and probably wasn't clear or balanced enough in the first place. I still can't use a stick aide yet as she loses her mind with that. She's still not great at the mounting block and the instructor said that's not uncommon for her - to be restless and walk off when you're trying to mount. And once you're on she doesn't like to wait while you adjust things. Her leathers are too stiff to adjust one handed and regardless it's not cool when not cued. I was actually forewarned that Irish hunting horses aren't accustomed to mounting blocks so it's not totally unexpected behaviour(?). So I'm going to spend some time at the mounting block and show her how great it is stand next to it and how mounting doesn't ALWAYS = work. 

But am I allowed to do even that? I don't know, honestly. I feel a bit weird, a bit uncomfortable, especially since the whole should I lead Katie for the wife thing which I'm going to respond to in a minute. Right now, I feel like an old fashioned housewife that is limited and restrained to a small number of things and it looks to remain that way for the foreseeable future. I am hungry to learn more but the doors are all shut, or so it feels...

I'm riding Katie again tomorrow. I don't know what to feel. Maybe I am pmsing... :<

-------------------------------------------


*The wife and husband*

W finally convinced her husband to come back and try another ride out at the same school he got bucked off. It was a weekend group lesson but there was only one other person booked - so a group of 3 only which is nice for an hour! Now this was cheeky - the instructor said that he really needs to go back to the beginning. But when W rang up she found out the school hadn't made a note of that. Since her husband would have been offended to go back to the beginner class she booked him into the same intermediate. I was against this and said from the get-go he wasn't capable, not yet. But in his mind, he can still canter and as a man, would be extremely upset to be a in a class below his WIFE (GASP). But since it was a lesson of 3 I figured they would make do. Whatever.

I turn up late - they have just mounted. I was late because I was busy chasing a dog down the A road (a 6 lane highway of 40mph). It got hit and died. Not much more I, or their owner or the other people helping, could have done. Blurgh. This school is different. In the intermediate class you're expected to know how to mount and do your own stirrups etc... well they don't. Since there was no teacher in the arena I sorted it out instead as his girth was very loose and his stirrups 6 holes too short (that's how he likes it but it's like a jockey position!). Wife and husband were on some cute cobs and the 3rd man-stranger was on DUH DUH DUH Mrs Bucker (not her real name), the one that chucked the husband last time. So just her being present in the school made them BOTH nervous. 

Instructor arrives. It's someone different. I groan inwardly. This school has an army of instructors but husband needs CONSISTENCY. She wasn't told anything about her three clients and just assumed they could steer and trot. She put Mrs Bucker lead file > husband > wife. Mrs Bucker is not a cob - she's a skewbald 15hh welshie (I think). Oh boy, the stranger on Mrs Bucker could not steer. He was very obviously VERY novice. I'm talking about flapping his arms above his head to try get a faster walk. I'm then watching husband. He's nervous - he is constantly adjusting the reins almost every 10 seconds like a tick. His horse is annoyed and keeps pulling his reins out his hands. For most of the lesson I watch him about 30+ times let his horse pull the reins out of his hands, he gathers them, adjusts them, adjusts them again, pulls out, repeats. It is actually INFURIATING to watch and when I couldn't bare it anymore shouted across the school for him to stop letting her pull the reins and to keep his hands still. The instructor told me off for interfering. The wife was last in line. She rode wonderful but was following the atrocious steering of her husband in front. I managed to whisper to her as she passed the gate to steer her own effing horse and not cut corners.

Now you might be wondering why I was interfering and that it was rude. I normally keep my mouth shut but this instructor was so bad, so oblivious and so obviously eager to finish what was the last class of her day that I wanted to shove her over and teach the lesson myself. She would repeat things like "don't cut corners" and "C'mon guys walk faster". Didn't ever mention ONCE about their positioning or flapping of hands. When Mrs Bucker was told to change rein he didn't know what that was and instead of explaining just got them to turn on the spot. When asked to trot he couldn't get Mrs Bucker to trot. For about 15 minutes I watched her ask for a trot, watch him fail and watch husband and wife become increasingly upset with how bad the lesson was going. There was no instruction. It was like a list of commands "trot. walk. halt." so forth. No feedback about anything. No helping of anything. 

Finally the instructor asks wife how long she's been riding. "9 months now", she responded. Instructor said "so you'll be good enough for Mrs Bucker. She doesn't tolerate bad riders. I want you to swap horses and go lead file". Wife looks at me in terror. I tell her just to get on Mrs Bucker and that she's perfectly capable of riding her. The MOMENT wife gets on Mrs Bucker the horse is already happier in her expression. She's clearly thankful to get this flapping man off her back and have a quiet rider. Turns out, they are a great match. By the end of the lesson wife loves Mrs Bucker and will request her next lesson. Mrs Bucker is a nice forward pony in the right hands and was very happy to go forward for the wife, but not for the stranger and not for her husband last time. The instructor is just listing off the same commands again with no feedback but the lesson feels better as they are now able to trot.

BUT. It gets worse. Wife is now lead file and is riding like a BOSS. She's steering well, she knows how to change rein. She is leading the trot with no issues at all and is getting on the correct diagonal. She's calming down and says that Mrs Bucker has a lovely pace. (If she can get on a horse that bucked off her husband and have that self-control I think she could ride Katie while I'm leading her, it is how the conversation was prompted in the first place. Wife has also had a horse rear with her (at another horse) and handled it great and has ridden the same horse since. This was all after her first ride on Katie. This is why I think she's improved in mentality since then. And the fact she ASKED me, so has thought it through. She's a thoughtful person and would never get on a horse unless she wanted to.) Her husband couldn't get his cob to trot once. It was obvious why - he always pulled himself up with the reins. He always has done. Just so happens the horse he rides at the other school is so eager to join it's friends that it ignores the pressure in its mouth and trots on. But this cob was like "oh, you want me to stop?" And stopped. So the husband kept asking for trot but then kept trying to pull himself with the reins. The cob eventually began to plant because she was clearly upset at him. But no..... he said "this horse is badly trained." He said the same about Mrs Bucker. But guess what? His wife is riding Mrs Bucker perfect right in front of his eyes. I can actually see the cogs turn in his brain.

He has a meltdown. Stops on the spot and gets off. Leaves the horse with us and still wearing his hat leaves the grounds for a cigarette. Shaking hands, shaking voice and leaky eyes. The wife is upset and it's ruined what was a good lesson for her. While shes getting changed I have a chat with him. He is so upset. SO UPSET. He said he wants to quit altogether that there is no way someone could go back from being able to canter to not being able to trot. I BEG him to come back for private lessons - alone, without us there to judge. He said he doesn't feel any competition but I know he doesn't like being watched. He has always said privates are a waste of money so he's never been willing to have them. He wants to go back to the other riding school because "he can ride there and the horses are trained". The horses are just better at listening to their momma at the middle of the arena because she OWNS AND TRAINS THEM HERSELF. Here, with different instructors, you HAVE TO RIDE YOUR HORSE! Ugh. 

Anyway he's going back to his home country in a few months for a fortnight. He wants to wait and ride at the stables near his family home there. They are a good stables - I've actually been there with them and watched them teach. You can also rent a horse without an assessment and take it out unsupervised. They live in borderline poverty but their care and instruction of the horses is very good, very official. They also have a male instructor who, again, is very good. But it's the only male instructor that all of us have come across. Husband is fed up of being taught by women and by being outdone by them (normal talk for him). So he is expecting to go out there and ride every day and come back a new man. I mean, riding everyday for two weeks after not riding for months is a great, and painful, idea. I doubt on the third day he would be able to sit well enough to learn a damned thing (the male instructor insists on lunge lessons with no stirrups and WILL trot you for the whole half hour until your seat is down out of desperation!) Wife meanwhile is trying to get him to book a private lesson on his own after work, but so far no luck. 

Also, wife cannot book lessons until he's made up his mind. The marital drama of her continuing to ride with his current mentality is not worth it, in her words. So... who knows eh? This might be the end! I hope not.


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## egrogan

What an adventure @Kalraii- you are a better person than me, that's all I'll say :wink:


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## Acadianartist

Great post. I feel I could sit down with you over a few pints and talk for hours. I imagine a few people here feel that way!

I agree, if Katie is out of hay at 6 pm, and doesn't get food again until 9 am, that would be a problem for me. A great way to get ulcers. I fully support the haynets. 

As for the tripping, I just wanted to say that Harley tripped a lot when we first bought him. Not only that, but his last TWO owners had mentioned it (the one who sold him to us had a very cute 14 page document the previous owner had typed up, with pictures and everything, when she sold him). They chalked it up to inattention. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't, but when we got him, we noticed it at first. A few weeks later, we removed his shoes, and started working with a barefoot trimmer who is incredibly knowledgeable. She examined him carefully, had me walk him up and down the aisles, stood behind him, in front of him. And began working to rebalance his hooves. And now, I can't remember the last time Harley tripped. I do stay on top of it though. My trimmer gave me a rasp and encouraged me to use it as needed (she showed me how) because in the summer, his hoof growth explodes, and he needs trimming every three weeks. My point is that a really good farrier or trimmer can do wonderful things for a horse. If you're not sure, do post pics for people like loosie to give advice. Maybe everything is fine, but it doesn't hurt to ask.

As to the self-doubt (imposter syndrome maybe?), I very familiar with it. I finally feel like I've got it now, but I often still feel like some of the horse people at the barn where my daughter rides look at me funny because I don't do things the way they do. And I remember feeling stupid soooo many times for not knowing something. This is not a feeling I know or enjoy. In my non-horsey life, I have control of things, I know what I am doing, in fact, I am considered an international expert in my field. Which leads to (or stems from?) a bit of an OCD/overanalytical/perfectionist outlook on things. I'm guessing you also fall in this category. Don't worry about it. Katie is your horse, just enjoy your time with her. Since you are working on clicker training, why don't you incorporate the mounting block? Google How to clicker train your horse to stand beside the mounting block. Tons of people have done it, and it's really fun. You'll likely get "looks" though, so prepare for that. You'll get unsolicited advice. Smile and nod, and keep doing what you're doing. Eventually, they'll just shake their head at you and walk away. 

As for this couple, wow. I'm glad the wife did so much better, she really has great potential. I think the best thing for them to just have separate activities - she rides, and he, oh, I don't know, does archery or something (manly). I don't think both of them riding together is a good idea, not that they are asking me! LOL It's really unfortunate for the wife, but he will never be able to just be happy for her progress, and he will always blame the horse, even when it's clearly not the horse. 

You're very patient. I'm sorry that dog died.


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## Golden Horse

OK, a couple of things to think about...you are right to get her checked out if she is tripping, I will say though that Fergie is I am not 'riding' her, will trip. so if she is just slopping along, she will fall over small pebbles, grains of sand, all that dangerous stuff, when I actually actively ride her, she remembers she has feet and looks after herself. We are strictly arena riders, not sure how she will be if and when we venture out onto the trails.

Confidence? now that is a strange one......being confident as an owner, comes over years and years and years of practice, same as being a parent, you have to experience everything, before you know everything and none of us have done that or know all that. What you are feeling is quite normal, the only worse thing is having your horse at home and having no one to ask, that really sucks.

I understand how it feels that there is some sort of fellowship of the horse, that you have to be a member of, before you are allowed to ask questions. Once again I now have the benefit of age, and know that there really are no stupid questions, only people not gracious enough to help people out. I have been very fortunate, my current barn is the only place I have boarded, and everyone helps everyone else out, from the most experienced to the beginners and kids, and us old re-riders. I give thanks again and again for this atmosphere.


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## tinyliny

Quite the saga. It can be hard working with men, if they feel that just by virtue of being male they should automaticaly be able to do physical things better than women. A lot of men CAN ride better, or handle horses better, due to their ability to project authority, and their physical strength (helpful in really demanding horse sports) . . . but, there's no given that comes with maleness when it comes to horses. Maybe that's why so many women are attracted to horses and riding. . . . 

I know how you feel about watching a lesson and wanting to shout out stuff. It is hard for me to keep my mouth shut when I watch my friend take a lesson. But, that's MY problem, not the teacher's. MY lesson is one of keeping clam, no matter what. Still working on that one . . . 

As for the whole confidence thing . . . I wonder, I just wonder if that isn't more a real 'thing' in the UK. I mean, there being more people who just KNOW things should be a certain way. Why? because they just are. More focus on rules and accepted traditions of horse care and riding. more of a sense of social stratification. And for some reason, folks feel 'higher' on the ladder if they can exclude someone 'lower'.

You'll get a bit of that at just about any large barn where the folks do mostly the same kind of riding. If it's a total schmorgasborg of disciplines, there is less of one person eyeing and judgeing another.

I used to ride out of a fancy barn. I was a total nobody there, and I 'felt' that in the cold approach I was given. I was so glad to get out of there. Where I am now, we have lots of 'backyard' owners, and we help each other out if there is a danger involved. Otherwise, we pretty much let each other stumble along happily.

oh, that reminds me, about stumbling . . . . like someone said, if you have the horse walking briskly, engaged, they will probably stumble less. Also, you can ask the farrier if by bringing the breakover point back a smidge it moght not help with that (speed up the ability to get the foot back up with each step)

lastly, does your mare, perhaps "Plait" in front? this is also called 'rope walking'. It's when the horse bring each foot forward AND across the other one, with each stop, as if she were walking on a rope/line, putting one foot in front of the other. Such horses often trip at the walk, but at the trot, you'll find it all disappears.


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## mmshiro

I decided to go back for a few lessons. The freedom at my current barn is great, and I'm taking full advantage of it, but because of - well, stuff - there is zero formal instruction to be had. I decided I would like an instructor to take me to the point where I can take a "started under saddle" horse and finish him/her myself - with a trainer giving instructions to me rather than training the horse for me. 

The first lesson was a bit funky. I had QH ex track pony (used to reassure young race horses as they went between stall and starting gate) and a tiny dressage saddle. It was so tiny that my first set of stirrups wasn't wide enough to hold the balls of my feet. It must have been a saddle for a 12 year-old girl. The boy was super wide! During the cool down, I dropped the stirrups and I could feel the stretch and pull in my groin from the hanging legs, which never happened on any other horse.

Horsey and I got along splendidly, though. At one point, instructor warned me to give the canter aid going into a turn to assist him finding the correct lead in his weak direction; I popped him into a canter on the straight without perceptible delay. Instructor said if she didn't know the horse, she wouldn't notice any difference between leads. Boo-yah! 

I did ask for a different saddle because in some corners I almost lost it, keeping him on the rail with my inside leg and not having much to hold against. The concept of "corners" is somewhat alien to me by now...as it is for the track pony, apparently. I think keeping the horse at the wall is much more difficult than keeping him straight in a field, because if you do oversteer, you won't lose a knee. Over the last year, I've become more comfortable outside the arena than inside.

All my instructors have been women. I must admit, however, that I like to seek out the somewhat more rustic, less pretentious, barns to do business with, so the way those BOs keep their horses already resonates with me and suggests some compatibility with how I like to be instructed. When that new BO/trainer laid down her ground rules for me, all I thought was, "Say no more! I wouldn't want it any other way!" The way you describe your trainers at the lesson barns, I get an image of a cross between Mary Poppins and Margaret Thatcher. I'd probably go to my home country for lessons, too......


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## Kalraii

Oof so many great and insightful replies. As for the stumbling - yup unbalanced hooves are really the first thing that stood out to me. She doesn't plait @tinyliny and what you said is what the manager said too! She also she doesn't clip her fronts with her backs (I forget the term). It's a stumble on either front and can happen at any gait. It can happen on any lead on a straight or a bend. But we have noticed it doesn't happen when she's jumping. Everyone who has ridden her has called her clumsy. Once everything is ruled out the manager said that if it does boil down to inattention/lack of training then we can deal with this is a strict and consistent way to help her develop the habit of being more careful with her feet. Poor lady, she's got some big ol' feet though. I would be worried about taking her fronts off considering her size and level/type of work right now. But can I just take a moment to appreciate how much easier it is to clean a bare foot? Lol. It has been suggested that she actually has rather good hoof growth and might need a farrier every 5 weeks instead of 6. The fact that @Acadianartist says that yours needs doing every THREE blimey. I hadn't even realised that's a possibility. And yup to everything you said. It's just funny when I go the manager and ask HER "hey what rug should I put on?" I mean... I know but the perfectionist in me would like to be sure. But I cannot help but laugh at it sometimes >.<

@Golden Horse the comment about fellowship is SO true. I am fortunate that where I am it's 50/50. I have worked at some yards with godawful atmospheres and bullying in plain sight. Thankfully it's not like this here. In fact, while I'm know I'm regarded as the absolute amateur and have chosen to embrace it and actually seems to be appreciated. I'm not awkward to be told if something is wrong and I trust in the staff. But I still feel like an audience is watching me, judging every move. I hope to get to the kind of comfort that many of you veterans here experience!

@mmshiro honestly I really didn't realise how hard it is to find good instructors but he sure makes its hard for me. I don't blame him for seeking reassurance with an instructor that is both male and good at his job. It doesn't help that he hates English people with a burning passion also though, while living in England. Rarely does an hour pass without being told something that "you people..." (to me) or without commenting on his dislike of rich, entitled English people that take their DD AND DS horse riding before tea and crumpets at the Ritz while their DH is on a business trip. Someone shoot me already. He also picks apart the instructors for being young, mostly English, women. The only instructors he has shown a shred of respect to are his own people, wise grandma who runs her own school and my own instructor for visibly handling a wild, out of control horse (lunging Katie LOL). I don't blame him for his views as I've met his parents and it's obvious that it's the misfortune of all their upbringings and history to continue to be so close minded. His wife practically BEGGED me to work with her in developing a friendship with him and trying to make this whole riding thing work for him. I. Am. Trying. But he is not willing to accept anything less than the perfect setup. I went to several schools before I selected my favourites. I had some OK rides, some bad rides, some instructors I'll never touch with a barge pole. But he wants and NEEDS the perfect setup from the get-go. There is rarely a second or third chance and often a meltdown, regardless of situation or circumstance. Sorry, it's just driving me insane and it shouldn't be. 

In fact I'm pretty angry about him quitting. Maybe because I am so invested and it took a LOT of biting my lip and shoving my opinion down my own oesophagus to make it this far. Sorry, he doesn't just get to quit after everything his wife and I have been through to get to this point just because three bad rides out of dozens.

EDIT: for what it's worth, I HAVE said my opinion several times before now in person, in the past. This is no secret.


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## Kalraii

Katie Update!

I had to share today because it was a bit different lol. I arrived later to find they've not been putting hay nets up as the message didn't get relayed to the others staff? No problem hereon I hope! It started snowing. We had a summer day only a few gone! Anyway... I decided to take Katie out for a walk down the local bridleway (in her turnout rug because the wind was so sharp). Walking away from home she's fine but coming back she tries to cut me in her haste to get back (it's not bad but noticeable). She has embraced the clicker really well and by the end of our walk we were on a fully slack rope and every time I stopped, she stopped. NEXT TO ME. Not in front, trying to mug me for a carrot. In fact she picked up so quickly I wonder if this is something she's been exposed to in the past? She's sure faster than some dogs I've worked with lol. 

Unfortunately JUST as we were coming back onto the property there was a bang (windy). Now this entryway has literally only room for me and her side by side. She lurched PAST me <3 I mean she was walking right behind me at this point so could have chosen to run me over. She calmed down instantly and acted nonplussed about it all. Anyway, she knows we have our regular roll in the indoor school. At the fork, once she knew where we were going she started to get excited. In fact she lunged herself on the spot for a few turns and I had to cut her off before she remembered who she was with. We get in the indoor school and I close the doors. At this point she is actually SHAKING with excitement, doing mini prances with her feet. I have never seen her so excited before but it's probably a bit of the bang earlier. I also wonder if she was turned out at all that day due to the snow??? 

I can tell it's taking her an extreme amount of self-control to remain still while I take her rug off. Once it's off and I remove her head collar she throws herself onto the floor and rolls like a mad woman grunting lol. She get's up and is bucking and galloping and squealing at the top of her voice someone actually came by to ask if everything was OK. Excitement? Anxiety? Both?! She has another roll at the other end of the school. Normally I just stand in the centre while she runs around, cheering her on. Sometimes we play chase the ball where I kick it gently AWAY from her and she chases it to touch with her nose, then telling it off with her hinds. But today she was waaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyy too excitable, bucking a LOT more than usual and coming too close at high speed. She was literally skidding and I did NOT want her skidding into me so I felt pretty uncomfortable. 

I went to the corner of the arena to grab my phone and a schooling whip, just to be safe. I filmed the video for you below. She always tells me to open the gate and let her free haha! But after this video (I ran out of memory) we walked slowly around the arena. I haven't clicker trained her to follow me at all but she actually will follow me around in a respectful manner. I'll stop and give her some wither petting and then continue our loop. If I actually say "Katie, c'mon" she'll give a longing look at the gate but then come over to me at the other side of the school WITH NO TREAT INCENTIVE. So I'm pretty flattered. Anyway, you can let me know your thoughts on her behaviour in the arena today. I cheered her on as normal but maybe it was too much 

EDIT: forgot to say we ended this on a really sweet, sleepy note as well. So hopefully a positive experience!


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## Kalraii

I got so carried away that I FORGOT to say that on my way back I broke down (was borrowing car) and had to stand for an hour in our "snowstorm" on the same a-road (6 lane highway) watching cars nearly crash into the back of me since I broke down in the fast lane -.- Off the exit ramp of a motorway. I hid behind the barriers. Alternator has gone.


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## Kalraii




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## Acadianartist

So cute! I think it was a bit of spring fever, and possibly excess energy from lack of turnout. Good that she got it out. Hopefully she will get more turnout as the weather improves. 

Sorry to hear of your breakdown. I hate it when cars break down. Stupid machines. Why didn't we just stick with horses?


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## EstrellaandJericho

I hope you don't mind me saying, you have a very pretty voice. I bet you could narrate a kids book or be a character in an animated show.


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## Kalraii

TY @EstrellaandJericho. I cringe at the cockney that slips through though haha. When I do presentations my voice is different and I often get asked what part of the US I'm from (or Australia/South Africa). Many do not believe I'm actually Welsh haha. I think I'd swear too much to narrate but I appreciate the compliment <3 

I rode Katie tonight. I got there early and I can tell now she's really starting to understand that I'm a special visitor. She actually responds to my voice on arrival whereas before she never acknowledged me until I was looking over her door. She's only been ridden once this week. But the moment I got the saddle out she was like OSH******* and gave me the eyeball while backing up. I really don't want her to be sour and I can't tell if she's sour about tacking up or work as I'm not the one doing it regularly :< Anyway I spent 20 minutes just grooming her and tacking her up really slowly and gently, with some carrots in-between. You know, it made a WORLD of difference just taking the time for both of us to chill. She normally giraffes when bridling but this time she didn't - I offered her the bit and she took it herself!!!!! What the-! I only had to say "come" for her to join me for the walk to the mounting block. Being very sweet!

I remembered to set my stiff stirrups BEFORE I mounted haha. And the amazing thing is that for the first time ever when mounting she was calm. Walked into the school calm, though a bit looky. I like to credit our amazing tack up sesh but only future can tell haha. The instructor said she was surprised at how calm Katie was because recently she's been a bit naughty and a bit fresh with the gaps between rides. Specifically charging off at a trot when mounted, moreso when mounting in the school itself. She was great with me actually - our best mounting and her calmness. But when I had do her girth up midway through the lesson she walked off on me twice. I only realised after I wasn't giving her release as I was so focused on doing up her girth. I don't think that's the sole problem but it probably didn't help either. 

So riding itself. I had an epiphany moment. I sort of am in the habit of sitting chair legged and cannot keep my heels down. I often lose my stirrups. It's REALLY MESSY. Anyway I love my instructor. She helped me find a position that put my leg further under me - I had to lean forward a bit more. I think for the first time EVER I engaged my back and core. In all my years the position never made itself known or just wasn't correctly explained to me, not for lack of trying! I'm actually aching in places I didn't know about... so I really feel this was a breakthrough. I was getting really bloody fed up of not even KNOWING HOW to fix my position. And whoever said half hour private isn't enough... eat your words. Because by the end of it I was dying. And for the life of me when Katie trots fast she trots fast and I cannot help but egg her on unintentionally. She's so bouncy it is SO HARD to regulate my rise and fall to get behind her. It makes positioning hard because Katie doesn't pace herself and I dont pace myself so we have these horrible wobbly moments where we are terribly out of sync. For the second time in a lesson she has been cheeky at resisting a canter. But it usually only takes one firm telling off so there's that. I really don't use my legs enough. Like maybe 1% of what I need to use. I never use them. I don't even have legs at this point I swear. SMH.

She's tripping much less - the instructor has noticed that she's becoming less clumsy with time and more careful with jumps. I noticed that as well but the ONE TIME she did trip on me in trot I lost my reins. And you know what? She continued trotting, a bit concerned, but calm enough for me to gather my reins and continue as if nothing had happened. It was then I got reprimanded for not riding her enough alone - she pointed out how safe Katie is lol. But the mounting - just the mounting - is our biggest boon. Peh. 

I tried to give her a carrot mid-ride while I caught my breath. She's a bit... special and it just didn't compute, even when I waved in her face. But I guess this was her first time ever being offered a treat from "up there". The instructor came and helped. It made me wonder though, if that even while she IS being a good girl for the most part, if that when she's being ridden she mentally shuts down a bit? What do you think? I sort of would like to get to a point where she not only listens to me but also realises that I'm listening to her. 

She is such a good girl though, overall, and I couldn't be happier. <3


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## tinyliny

I used to give my lease horse, X, carrots from the saddle, quite a lot. but, it got to the point where if I even moved my hand to the pocket, or near it, he'd come to an abrupt halt and cock his head to look back at me, for his treat. 
He'd even stop spontaneously and look over his shoulder at me , for a treat, as if him stopping would CAUSE the treat to magically appear.

I realized this was causing a problem, and stopped that. I still hand feet him treats, plenty, but I only feed from the saddle once; when I am mounted with my stirrups adjusted. only then does he get his mount-up treat. 


As you get better at controling your seat, you will become better able to 'talk' to the horse through the reins, and your legs and seat. It's very hard to influence a horse until you can be 'quiet' in your body. When you can, then your hand or body weight changes , etc, can speak to the horse.

Horses pay attention to you if you give them something interesting to pay attention to. You have to be important to them; more important than anything else that might be calling to their mind.

You'll get there. It takes a year, I think, to really know a horse and build a real repoir with them. at 6 months you start to feel it, and at a year it feels like your well worn sneakers; you can step in and go.

I'm glad your instructor could help you with position. I remember taking skiing lessons, and having a huge epiphany when an instructor told me tothink of it as lifting my skis up to my body when going over bumps, and to keep my body always facing downhill. HUGE difference, just like that! I'm still a very mediocre skier, but it makes me able to ski modest hills with stability.


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> Nutter video


Her behavior reminds me of a lead horse trying to create a draw to make another horse follow her: put on some pressure, turn, and move away; repeat. I can't find a video, because searching for "horse creating draw" brings up all the Etsy videos, but if I find one, I'll show you.


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## Acadianartist

Awesome progress! And I can so relate. Those private lessons are indeed amazing. What you can accomplish at the end of a lesson with a good coach is mind-blowing!

I also find Kodak would prefer to do liberty and ground work rather than riding. So I take my time with the riding - sounds like that's what you did. I ride bitless, so it's easy for me to just put the bridle and saddle on, do a bit of ground work, I talk to her, rub her head, then ride (I have clip-on reins so easy to take on and off as well). I don't want her to associate tack with something less pleasant for her. I think we often rush through the brushing and tacking up part because we want to ride or need to get ready by a certain time. I realize now it's a bit rude to the horse. They're entitled to a little "foreplay" before we jump on them and go.

I also tried offering treats from the saddle, but that didn't work well. My arms are too short, and it was more of an interruption than anything else. I also unknowingly created a problem when I'd say "good girl" during liberty work, when she would stop when I stopped. Now she thinks "good girl" means whoa! So if I'm riding, I say "good" or pat her on the neck for praise. And she ALWAYS gets a treat after a ride, and don't think she doesn't know it! I find horses have much longer attention spans than dogs. I'm pretty sure she is thinking about that treat the whole time we ride, lol. When I'm putting away the saddle and bridle, she nods her head up and down in her stall to remind me she needs her treat! 

And in terms of position, I had the same epiphany last winter. When I finally started using my whole body to ride (abs, legs, everything), I found a huge difference in how much we were in harmony, but omg was I ever sore after lessons. I still am. I am working on riding Kodak more often so we can both get into shape. I also struggle keeping my legs under me. I think they're under me, then someone takes a picture and I'm like "really? ugh". I think it requires some muscle tone to get to a point where you can post in balance and use your legs efficiently. We've been working on collected and extended trot in lessons, and it was a revelation to me that I could collect Kodak by slowing down my posting and sitting back a bit while contracting my abs. It's physically demanding, but it works like a charm. Only issue is that sometimes when I ask her to collect, she thinks I'm asking her to walk, and my coach tells me to use my leg to keep her trotting, and I struggle to push and pull, tighten my abs, and squeeze with my legs while slowing down my posting all at the same time! Gawww, this is hard! 

It sounds like you two are progressing so well and really creating a relationship. As @Tiny says, it takes time. I think different horses take different amounts of time too, depending on whether they're introverts or extroverts. 

I think you're coming along extremely well for someone who hasn't had a horse that long, and is only able to ride what, once or twice a week at best? Kudos!


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## Kalraii

@mmshiro she does that a LOT - the really cute look and the way she shows off. I feel like she's actually trying to talk TO ME during these moments, asking me to come play. I really like how you put it though and would love to watch that video if you manage to find it. 
@tinyliny I actually think it's hilarious that he would stop to look at you haha. I actually think your idea is better especially since she has issues with mounting and being still - give her a fat treat for being still and calm instead of randomly in the lesson and one after it. I'll have to remember your skiing tip as well since bf (being Swiss) enjoys skiing a LOT and I'm worried about flying off the side of a mountain. Really I just cannot wait until Katie and I are that familiar with each other bah.
@Acadianartist TY! I actually think Katie would be a good candidate for bitless - I mean, she might as well not have one right now LOL (that's a lie the d ring helps with steering atm!). I think liberty is so amazing but so hard to do with my infrequent visits :< I would love to see a video of Kodak in action! It's so clear how fond you are of her <3 Let's toast to the ab pain xD


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## Kalraii

Ugh. I've had a very strange night and kept waking up. With all the foaling/yearling threads going around I had a nightmare where I was told Katie was having triplets. Wth. I remember the feeling of puking in my so called dream...

...to wake up and find that one of my degus, called Bang, was very unwell and disorientated with a smelly discharge from his mouth. In the past he has fought off pneumonia twice so anti-biotics and the use of an adapted nebuliser setup is normal. I have had over 20 degus in my time and found that MY greys are likely to be genetically predisposed (as they were all related) to certain issues as all of them have had problems whereas my chocolates are "fatties" (easy keepers!) with great immune systems. Anyway, this wasn't the onset of a chest infection as expected it turned out to be an abscess. But poor Bang has been through enough and surgery to remove the offending molar is not an option. I asked to have him put down. I gave him unlimited chocolate in his last minutes before going to the gas chamber. It's his favourite because he was a blighter for stealing what he could from my desk but degus get diabetes just from looking at sugar, nvm the dairy! He was still disorientated but not so far gone that he could resist stuffing his mouth even through the pain. 

I rather he went with a bit of gusto in him than wait until he can't breath and is septic. Antibiotics have wreaked havoc on his organs enough in his life, too. So while it was the right decision I bawled my eyes out. I've seen so many animals die, humanely and otherwise. It never gets easier. I get told it means I'm still alive enough to bawl, which is a good thing. Today though I did not have the emotional energy to be there when he was put to sleep, which is unusual for me. Anyway. We all know this pain. It makes me happy that I'm mortal because at least one day I'll join them in the dirt with the worms or find out if another dimension exists! :frown_color::frown:

And you know I have SO MANY animals, majority rescued with special needs, that I actually have a list in my mind of who to expect to die next so I can remain prepared. I'm estimating that another 2 are going to leave this world in the next 6 months. Hold me :<


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## tinyliny

What is a degu?


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## Kalraii

Gonna quote from this website What Is a Degu? (the best Degu community around!):

_If someone tells you they have degus, and your reaction is either "you have what?" or "have you seen a doctor about that?", this page should help you. There's one looking at you now.

For those of you thinking of degU, you're on the wrong page! For the rest of you, take a look at . Cute? We think so!!

Briefly: a degu is (currently) a rodent of order Caviomorpha that lives in Chile in South America. Highly social herbivorous mammals, they live in groups, nest in burrows and are diurnal (active during the day). They are about the size of an adult person's open palm and have brown pelts (fur), pale UV reflective ventral (belly) fur, light rings of fur around their eyes and orange teeth. They also have a medium length tail with short, wiry hair becoming longer at the tip. Degus are sometimes referred to as 'brush tail rats' or 'trumpet tailed rats'52 but are entirely unrelated to rats. Other names that local people often use to refer to wild degus include 'chozchoris', 'rata de las cercas', 'raton de tapias', 'bori' and 'Cuming's octodon'52. The name 'degu' is itself derived from its Latin name, Octodon degus. 'Octodon' translates from Latin as 'eight tooth' (octo=eight, dens=tooth), while 'degus' is derived from the Latin word 'degusto' meaning to taste/graze. Octodon degus therefore loosely translates as 'eight tooth grazer', a name which the naturalist who discovered them clearly obtained through aspects of their physiology and behaviour._

Picture Below:


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## Acadianartist

So sorry for your loss. I bet he was adorable.


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## tinyliny

I see. I know many people find rodents repulsive, but I rather like them. we had pet rats who were very sweet. Squirrels are adorable.


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## Kalraii

*Disappointment and friendships...*

It's not been a great week it seems. I'm loving the clocks having gone forward and the attainable sunrise now (I love my 5.45am dog walks! The only time it's quiet around here...). As you know I had to put Bang down. I haven't got a chance to spend as much time with Katie but I think that will be my complaint whether or not I see her 1 or 5 times a week ****. 

Some of you have followed the story of the wife and husband. Well good news... the husband agreed to a riding session on Weds evening (same yard he got bucked off on). I'm going to meet him there to make sure everything goes smoothly but ultimately I wont be watching. It's only 10mins from my house so it's not a big deal. His wife wont be joining him either as I agreed with her that he just needs time to work on his issues alone. 

I don't use facebook though I have a profile from like 10 years ago. Earlier today I went onto the Wife's just to get some pictures of Katie that I know she took on her arrival. The pictures are beautiful but I can't post them as they are included in the pictures. Remember I said English isn't their first language? Well facebook has a translator and I was curious at all the comments on Katie's pictures. Well... turns out they are claiming Katie as if she is THEIRS. They do state a friend bought her but that THEY are responsible for Katie's care and can ride her whenever they want. I was mortified. My boyfriend, who actually helped buy Katie, is also annoyed at this. We know that this is the facebook phenomenon of pretending that life is better than it is by lying but still.... I'm just disappointed the most. I have done a lot for both of them and I wouldn't have expected this behaviour from an adult. I generally prefer my own company and do not crave friendships but when I do have them they mean a lot to me. It just amazes me how often people can take advantage of a friend. 

Anyway. New outlook. I'm not stupid. I won't bring this up to them but sure as hell am never accepting a request to ride Katie or visit her without me. At least I don't have to worry about either of them TRYING to ride Katie or do anything **** as they are not at all confident on their own. Sad day. I might have a drink.


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## tinyliny

I don't trust Facebook translator too much. They are often wrong.


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## Acadianartist

Ugh, well assuming it isn't a translation error (something you could probably figure out pretty easily - what language was it written in?), that really sucks. If it were me, I'd be distancing myself from them asap.


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## Kalraii

It's not a translation error - I know people from the same country and asked them if I was going crazy. Turns out it means what it means :< Yeah I won't be bending over backwards anymore.


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## Acadianartist

Kalraii said:


> It's not a translation error - I know people from the same country and asked them if I was going crazy. Turns out it means what it means :< Yeah I won't be bending over backwards anymore.


Good that you checked to make sure. I can't "like" that post. Sorry you were disappointed. People most often disappoint. Which is why I like hanging out with Kodak best. Focus on enjoying Katie.


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> The pictures are beautiful but I can't post them as they are included in the pictures.


Are the pictures worth going through the trouble of sticking emoticon smilie faces over their faces with an image editor? 

Yeah, what they did isn't exactly what I'd call betrayal, but it's a bit creepy nonetheless. It makes you wonder in how far they will start to believe their own fairytale. Well, win some, lose some. I think you showed great tolerance towards their overall shenanigans, and let's face it - he's a bit out there with his delusions of rodeo, and she picked him and tolerates him. Everyone's a bit off in their own way, but there were signs. Good for you that you tried not to hold it (too much) against them. I don't think they did it to harm you in any way, but your reaction is surely appropriate.

There is a reason why I'm never in any pictures/videos on the trail with my horse - she's the only one around, and she doesn't have a finger for the shutter release...


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## Kalraii

*First solo hack!*

So I've been pretty busy of recent (who isn't?!) and it has left me feeling a bit down. I haven't seen as much of Katie as I would like. It turns out she's not 16.2hh. She's actually 17hh. This whole time I was correct in saying she's taller than the usual 16+ I ride!

Today was practically summer. It was a warm 15 celcius (59F), enough to bare skin though some ppl would call that winter lol... I was warmly welcomed by Katie and was amazed at how CLEAN SHE WAS. The young boy that works/volunteers there came over to brag that he'd groomed her and how pleased he was that she's so easygoing. He has a lot more growing to do though and he laughed at how he needs half hour to tack her up because lifting the saddle onto her is such a feat. I tacked her up and was early for my lesson, which was rescheduled last minute because of my transportation issues. 

The instructor was super kind, as usual, and in the lesson asked me why I haven't moved Katie, since it's so difficult to get there. I actually said it was because of HER that I was staying and she seemed really taken aback. But yes, I mean it. Her instruction and the fact she cares for the working livery horses like they are her own in training and with fairness is so important to me. I'm not ready to move somewhere new and risk losing this support and level of care which Katie and I both receive. So for now, I have to suck it up. I might hopefully have a way around this problem but more on that another time. Also, because it's so hard to get down there she's allowed me to book on the day, if a slot is available. So at least I know 100% I can make it than do it weeks in advance and have something come up last minute - which feels like it always happens. 

But I was so relieved to finally get to ride Katie today that I had no energy for a proper lesson. About halfway (most of it spent chatting about life and her recent puppies, at a walk, haha) I just said that I wanted to take Katie out for a hack. It came out of nowhere. And just like that we ended the lesson and with a grin she saw me off. My first solo hack. I haven't even hacked out with anyone else like I'd planned. Just like that out of nowhere I decided to take her out alone. It's unusual! Yes, she wasn't too eager to go but only needed a little encouragement. I was happy for a plod as long as we were moving. Such a beautiful day I cannot tell you. We even trotted a few times where the ground was good. I didn't want to overdo it with a canter as she can be a be sticky with it still and wanted to make sure this was a positive experience for us together. We met some other hackers on the way and she asked to follow them. I found out today that when Katie asks to turn back she does it really gently - it's not hardcore napping or anxious prancing. Just a slight twist of head and body for a few moments that goes away quickly. 

But then... we reached the end. And had to turn back round. *To face home.* As I asked her to pivot the horse forum flashed in my minds eye and I reread all the posts about horses bolting homes in a split second. LOL. I told myself "don't sweat it, pretend you don't care". So I did. Katie absolutely did begin a very energetic march back towards the stables. It's about 15mins walk each way. At once point she nearly broke out in a trot. So I just started to ask her to stand and turn on the spot. With each release (it was like seeing magic for real) she relaxed. Started snorting and asking to drop her head. I halted her about halfway to chill out and watch the birds and at this point I did something naughty and gave her a long rein, holding onto the buckle and prepared for a monster to set her off. She instantly let out, got out her snorts and was absolutely chilled instead. I let us walk a few minutes like this towards home but then some hackers were coming past so I gathered them up. It was dinner time but still she kept up the relaxed walk. We hadn't even done any work or got a sweat. I was told she hadn't been ridden for a while. The fresh Katie I was expecting vanished. 

And voila, we were home. No drama, no big fight and no funeral pyre to be prepared. I untacked her took her for a walk on the grassy bank. But it gets better. About 20minutes into her munching the grass she asks to go back to the stables and I agree. It's really strange. She isn't pushing me around. She's genuinely offering her opinion to me, I don't know how else to put it in words? I can say no and she will respect it. I imagine you horsey veterans know what I mean! We get back into her stable and not even THIRTY SECONDS had passed and she was on the floor trying to sleep. I have never seen Katie on the floor, let alone sleep. But her bed, thick enough, I thought, wasn't thick enough. Not to get comfortable. She readjusted a few times but just couldn't get comfy. She started to shiver, being fully clipped and all and I was planning on rugging her. It was still alarming to see her shivering like that though. I was panicking "omg she's gonna colic!" before remembering to rug her lol. So in-between another adjustment I brushed her off fast and did her rug up. I then used my feet to bring the bank down to make the bed thicker for her while she watched me. I patted the deepest portion, like you'd pat the sofa for your dog to jump up, and she instantly began dropping down. I had to get out the way man super fast! Didn't expect that. She let me pet her while she was down. As she warmed up the shivering completely stopped. She looked really chill and happy. And boom! Finally she was asleep, not grunting or looking uncomfortable, flat out on her side. Doing cute little horsey snores. I cleaned her bridle, filled her haynets and left her like that. 

So a very special day. I don't get to see her nearly enough and I'm amazed at the progress between us in spite of this. I think that for her to truly be comfortable to lie out flat she actually needs TWICE the amount of bedding in her stall. She was DESPERATE to lie on her side splayed out. 

I am only sad that I cannot do more of this. Peh <3


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## EstrellaandJericho

My heart soars for you. Congratulations on reaching the point of understanding and communicating with your sweet Kate.


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## Acadianartist

HF really needs a "love" button. This is amazing. Your comfort level with animals is paying off big time, as you are able to read your horse as few "beginners" can. I count myself in that category, btw. I only learned to communicate with Kodak because of the liberty training we did. You have managed to get in touch with Katie, and establish a relationship with her in so little time, and in such an intuitive manner. I am so happy for you, and for Katie.


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## Kalraii

Thank you. I cannot tell you how eye opening every single encounter I have with her. It turns out Katie isn't a forward horse, not really. Not in the truest sense. Now that she's settled in and has changed with time it does make me realise that how she was before, was potentially as a result of her previous owner. Despite being brave, she was always worried, I think which is why she was so "responsive". It felt like she was always worried there would be severe repercussions. Now she's testing how lazy she can get away with  She CAN be forward when it's asked of her and honestly I like it that way. What I love most is that when she should have been at her most fresh and energised on the hack, she was able to relax to the point of wanting to rest her head on the floor _on the way home_. It really goes to show how much anxiety can play into behaviour, not necessarily energy all by itself. I just thought it was really cool.

I forgot to also mention... a regular rider of my instructor has requested to horse share. She vouches for this lady and said that any time spent in the saddle with Katie would be for Katie's benefit, and mine. I said I'm open to hearing about it but would like some idea of what sort of share agreement she's after and obviously meet her. Katie is being worked about 3 hours a week currently but her maximum a week, including if I rode her 3 times (which I don't), would be 5 hours. She also lives more local than me. 

When I was asked I actually felt sort of crushed at first but quickly realised that MAYBE, depending on what this lady wants to do exactly, it could be a benefit. Really, I want someone to spend time with Katie. Grooming her and just giving her attention. I think she deserves it as I cannot be there as much as I'd like. OBVIOUSLY I want that person to be me. I'd be DIY and practically live in her stall if I could! But what worries me most is that Katie isn't enjoying her work. She doesn't love flat work and every single time I've got out her tack she wears an ugly face. It's the only time I see her ugly face and its more of an upset face, than anything. I could be over-reacting. Maybe she doesn't like the way some people tack her up or maybe she dislikes one rider or another, I can't know? I just take extra time to tack up slowly and considerately, without stress so she's much happier by the end of it. The work she does is NOT hard-hard and she gets to jump, which she does enjoy. But I think she is a hacker horse. This all must be very boring for her compared to her upbringing. But she will work, she's very easy going. It's just painfully clear to me now that it doesn't spark her up the way I'd like but it is needed, right now, as she's still too green. 

So I'll think about the sharer. I will obviously be coming here for advice when I get an idea of her expectations/preferances. 


OFF-TOPIC. My bf and I found something out amazing. We can rent horseboxes. I know... this is so silly. OFC I can, anyone can. For £50 a day (+fuel) I can take Katie out somewhere! I will absolutely crap my pants but there are some safe parks like Richmond where there are other horse people and people in general, to help me out if things go awry. I will wait until I get this mounting issue out of the way and will then consider taking her out on monthly excursions to keep life interesting! I am so excited I am currently creating a list of places we can go local to me, to begin with. I am just really sad I have no one to go with... but in a way I think it'd be easier on my own so I'm not distracted. 

Let me know your thoughts, if any <3


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## Kalraii

Oops - and regards to her ugly tacking up face. I've read too many posts on here to not consider it a pain/fit thing. But, what I* do is I groom and love on her with her tack in view, so she knows its coming, and by the end of our "session" she's VERY happy to have her gear on. No flinching, pinning or eyeballing. She takes the bit herself. Riding her she's fine. I hope you all know that I will 100% get a second opinion fitting wise and later on maybe a vet chiro, just for the sake of it. I've really observed her closely and think it's a associative thing with her instead.


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## Acadianartist

On the riding/tacking up issue, I think you are handling it well by taking your time. I think that all too often, we just want to tack up and go, when the horse needs a little more "foreplay". That sounds weird, but I don't really know how else to put it. Sitting on a horse is a dominant, intimate thing to do, and I think we need to remember that. Ideally, the horse and rider form a partnership, and are happy to spend time together. But I now feel that for some horses, it's important not to rush it. Also, I was concerned about breaking our connection by riding Kodak after working on liberty training for months. So I now do a little ground work, sometimes even a little liberty work before we ride, depending on how much time we have. Except that I tack her up for it. I ride bitless, so I just use her bridle like a halter, or leave the reins over her neck, and we walk around a bit like that. So now, she doesn't immediately think that seeing the saddle means fun time is over (she really enjoys liberty training and ground work). Even just walking her around the riding arena once or twice before getting on her is better than nothing if I don't have a lot of time. 

On sharing Katie, it would depend on the person I guess, but you are really getting to know the real Katie right now. Given that she doesn't seem that keen on getting tacked up, do you really want someone else to be doing that? While time under saddle is usually good, it might make her even more sour if this person is going to be doing arena work with her. I guess I'd be worried that it will complicate your relationship, so my tendency would be to hold off just a little longer. Develop a strong bond with Katie, figure out what makes her happy/unhappy, and then consider sharing her. 

You are describing a fairly sensitive horse that is not afraid to be herself around you. Throwing another rider in the mix will complicate things. But you have good intuition about animals, so go with your gut.


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> every single time I've got out her tack she wears an ugly face. It's the only time I see her ugly face and its more of an upset face, than anything. I could be over-reacting. Maybe she doesn't like the way some people tack her up or maybe she dislikes one rider or another, I can't know?


It could well be a nervous tick from her past life. Marion, the horse I ride now, has a nervous tick like that when I put on the girth: she bares her teeth at me, scrapes her teeth against the stall wall, etc. She never makes contact, so instead of correcting her, I reassure her. She shows the same reaction, though less pronounced, when brushing or touching the girth area. She relaxes when I just leave my hand there, so it's the approach, not the touch. Someone really did something nasty to her.

As a matter of experiment, I tried to tighten the girth without getting a reaction. Turns out, if I go about 5 seconds per hole, one hole at a time, she stays relaxed. She's also relaxed after she's all tacked up and I go to get my hat. (I tack her up in a stall.) She does not react to the girth after the ride when I pull up the billet straps to undo the buckle, even though that, for a second, tightens the girth. She's also completely non-reactive from me bringing the gear, putting on her breastplate, to positioning the saddle. 

Seeing her react like that actually makes me sad because she's being stressed over something that won't hurt her, and hasn't for years. Which is why I choose comforting and reassuring even though seeing teeth fly at you can be a bit unnerving. Maybe she just figures that little ritual is what's needed to not get hurt...

So, anyway, my point is that it may be hard to distinguish your horse's reaction to something you are about to do from a horse's reaction to something she's experienced in the past.


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## knightrider

When we got my daughter's pony, years ago, he was extremely reactive about being saddled. When I tried him out before buying him, I saw that his saddle didn't fit at all, and he has a bare spot and white hair on his withers, so someone rode him quite a lot in a saddle that didn't fit. After we brought him home, he would spin around, go to the back of his stall, and go through all kinds of evasions to avoid having the saddle put on him.

I found him a saddle that did appear to fit, and over the years, he stopped reacting. Now, 11 years later, he doesn't mind at all being saddled. It just took time.


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## egrogan

Agree on things taking time and "reprogramming" the horse to not expect something unpleasant, even it's old news by now.

I chuckled a little at this comment


> Despite being brave, she was always worried,


as it reminded me of my horse Fizz after I first bought her (about 5 months ago now). She knew the rules, she wanted to "do the right thing," and she was brave about riding anywhere without any other horses. But her face always looked tense (still does at times, to be honest), like she didn't know what would happen if she disobeyed. You could really see the worry in her eyes- literally, she would show the whites of them- when she was in the barn alone getting tacked up. She would dance around side-to-side in the crossties and keep looking over her shoulder. Since that was becoming a pretty bad experience, I started changing the routine. I'd take her for a handwalk down the road or on a short section of trail, or go into the indoor and do some simple groundwork, before ever tying her up. Getting her mind engaged a little first seemed to really make her less anxious in cross ties. I also learned that unlike my other horse, she doesn't particularly enjoy grooming. I was asking her to stand still tolerating something she didn't like for way longer than I should have. Now I'm very quick and business like in grooming, just making sure there's no dirt under the saddle, and we move on to something more active. She's got a "busy brain" and really just wants to get to do something, not stand around. Still, we've gotten to a place where she can stand quietly without fussing in the barn whether there are other horses or not. Just took time.

As far as not liking girthing up, I was just writing about that in my journal this week too. We recently got a new saddle, and the fitter was out Thursday and was a little hurried in doing up the girth, which sent Fizz flying down the aisle dragging me with her. She is not a pushy horse like that so it was uncharacteristic. Yesterday I went extra slow with the girth, one hole at a time, and she was fine. I do think sensitive horses get particularly offended when someone doesn't treat them with consideration- which is totally understandable! I will be extra aware of the girthing process for awhile though so she doesn't have to add that to her list of worries :wink:


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## Kalraii

Update time!

I just reread every ones responses about tacking up again and feel sad, again. Amazing what some horses endure. They can scream and buck and turn into monsters and the wrong person can still find something even more torturous than the original problem to make them do what they want. Meh.


I saw Katie yesterday and the yard was very busy busy! Loads of volunteers and other owners around. Almost like a shopping mall! I had several people ask if I was riding her (AGAIN) and I said no (AGAIN) haha. When I go see Katie riding isn't even on my mind, strangely enough. When I was taking lessons before her I was like RIDE RIDE RIDE RIDE. Now I just wanna hang out - am aware that my minor anxiety about mounting might be a mental block for this so am continuing my lessons  

I was dumbfounded, however, by how much the regular people, staff and volunteers alike, love Katie. Remember when I brought her to the yard they asked to use her for working livery BECAUSE one of their mares had a field accident? Well that mare has to be ridden at a walk on a hard surface = hacking. But she's not a great hacker, apparently, and she needed a solid horsey companion that isn't bothered by anything. Guess who? Apparently Katie is utterly bombproof even to horses that like to lose their mind because the wind blew or a car passed. 

I got asked three times by other owners, who I've not met before, if I was Katie's mum and then they went on about how big she is and how lovely and sweet natured she is. It's almost as if she's famous! It makes me happy that she has had such a positive impact for so many people and that she isn't lacking for attention or grooming (which she loves). It does continue to make me a bit sad, only a bit, that she's not all exclusive  But... what made me happy was when I arrived she was in the field, I called out her name and she came right over to the gate - while in the same field another owner was simultaneously begging/bribing their horse with a feed bucket to no avail. 

I do need to ride her more. I haven't been paying for lessons elsewhere so at this point I'm actually decaying in fitness and ability. It being so far away kills me, though. What keeps me going each week is seeing how much she is thriving and opening up as she is.

Peace out


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> But... what made me happy was when I arrived she was in the field, I called out her name and she came right over to the gate - while in the same field another owner was simultaneously begging/bribing their horse with a feed bucket to no avail.


:rofl: The only thing that would improve this story is her telling _you_ how to show _your_ horse "who the boss is"...


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## Acadianartist

You are doing everything right! And it sounds like you and Katie are making a place for yourselves at this yard. Shame it is so far away... any chance you can move? I'm only half kidding...


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## Kalraii

@Acadianartist I am actually considering it once we finish up some refurb to rent out my current house. And yeah @mmshiro that would be funny  But they'd have to pull a complaint out of thin air as there is quite literally not a bad thing anyone can say about her xD


*UPDATE RIDING*: So heatwave week. I had a lesson with Katie and my instructor today by late morning/lunch. I don't like the heat. I don't really like the cold much either haha. I didn't prepare so I am now sunburned on my arms and neck >.< But it was truly a beautiful day. I have been unwell with tonsillitis and plus the heat meant that I had to take a lot of breaks in my half-hour. Before getting Katie I was the typical inner-city lesson-goer that always wanted to trot and canter more. Not to the extent of my friends but waiting turns in group arena lessons did get tedious. Now I am have exclusively privates I'm almost begging to take a break LOL. 

I wasn't as supple today and had to raise my stirrups by TWO HOLES! I already ride short at the best of times. And despite basically having jockey like stirrups I could not keep my heel down. *Guys this is beginning to really get me down.* My instructor says it'll come with more regular riding. I CAN physically keep my heels down no problem when it's all I need to focus on. When I need to use more leg... my heel and leg come up, toes down. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. So I can look nice while riding but it means I have no communication via my leg as it's all I can focus on. I can't keep Katie on track much less with a bend in her body like this. It is legit driving me insane. I can't trot her without stirrups YET but I think I can maybe ride her alone and dangle my legs at a walk. What do you think? I am doing stretches at home as well.

By the end of my lesson, where my instructor wants me to canter, I am so tired and starting to feel sick because of the heat. Despite always having a terrible lower leg I never feel unsafe or as if I'm gonna slide off. So when I canter I am basically cantering without stirrups. And Katie was SUCH A GOOD GIRL! She didn't argue today and it was very sweet - she picked up the wrong lead so brought her back to a trot and she herself naturally went back into canter on the correct lead. It's the first time she's taken initiative and I guess demonstrates a proper understanding of leads now. We laughed about how we should maybe canter earlier in the lesson where I have the energy to try balance everything properly 

Well... nice day to hack right? So we went out again. Katie wasn't so eager at the start but we had some really nice forward trots. Something special and new happened today. Normally she will never eat if you halt her next to some grass, while being ridden. When I walk her in-hand I have to point to the grass and say "go on" and give her permission to eat. Last hack out she didn't get it from the saddle. But today, on a loose rein I leaned down and pointed to the grass and she tentatively began to munch. I rode Katie the whole way home on the buckle INCLUDING a few trots. I practised using my seat to ask for a stop and every time she stopped for a minimum of a few seconds I rewarded her by giving her permission to munch some grass. She doesn't argue about coming away though - all I have say is "come on!" and she will lift her head and go back to walking, not even attempting to snatch her head to grab some grass. She only did it when I gave her permission to. Such. A. Good. Girl. I am well aware of potentially ingraining new habits but I think a balance of respect between us can be easily found. I would like to take her on long hacks eventually and ofc I'd want her to enjoy it too!

-------------------------------------------

*UPDATE ON BATHING:* I hosed her down for the first time and shampoo'd her legs and tail. After I used flyspray and let her out - naked - in the field.... take a guess what she did? >.< I finally know the pain haha. While bathing her in this icy water - tolerable due to the heat, I gave her lots of carrot and apple chunks. I've never bathed her properly and wasn't sure what to expect. An angel of a horse, of course.

------------------------------------------


*UPDATE ON SHARING:* Help me guys. My instructor speaks very highly of the lady that is interested in sharing Katie and brought it up again. I also got a text from the sharer (I'll call her that from now on for ease) and she seems really nice. Instructor says shes a very high level rider, professionally trained in jump and would bring Katie's training forward in leaps and bounds as the focus would be on her schooling and less the rider learning the basics. In response to some of my questions - no confirmation - the potential sharer replied "we can begin with only two days a week for starters?". I am not comfortable entertaining anything more than two days share though I get the impression from that she would like more. 

I would have to cut her work down elsewhere as well as her schedule looks like this - weekly:

- 5 half hour slots per week for working livery/riding school (rarely do all 5 get used, though might change with summer)
- 2 half hour slots per week for exercise by the yard manager and staff (I pay for, in addition to livery)
- 2 slots for me each week (though I don't always ride her every week)
- 2 slots for potential sharer 

On average she gets ridden 5-7 times a week in reality but if all quotas are met that's 11 rides a week. I don't like that. I don't see her as a machine. Logically I should replace the exercise that I PAY for and use those slots for potential sharer where it would financially save me, rather than cost me. And probably bring her working livery usage down to 4 slots. So that would be 8 rides a week. 2 me 2 sharer 4 school. I would be saving money and trading the yard manager's expertise for sharer's, instead. Also, I'm assuming that even tho I have insurance for Katie and I this sharer would need to get her own personal accident cover? Mine covers me, Katie and third party liability.

I want to say yes. And I want to say no. Should I ask to meet the sharer and see her ride, even though I have an eye for equitation as good as many of you can fly a helicopter.


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## Kalraii

Some pictures from today. When I call her name she always gives me this "yeah?" Look lol. And tacked up I left her for one sec to grab phone and she was stuffing her face >.< naughty! Very cute expression tho watching outside. And one bad picture of her in her herd outside! She's the grey on the right. You can't see her freshly muddied side  the skinny one is being rehabbed by good people and is in much better condition already, the poor baby <3


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## Kalraii

Not sure if I posted this one before x


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## knightrider

I wouldn't stress so much about the heels down. I spent 3 weeks at an Andalusian horse farm in Spain. There were two sets of German people there with me. I noticed the Spanish people ride with a level foot, and after I felt comfortable with them, I asked about heels down. They had never heard of putting your heels down, and neither had either of the German folks. They were all excellent riders, but their heels were more level than down.

FWIW, I would stop paying someone to ride Katie, and go with the sharer . . . but watch her ride first. You don't want some heavy handed lady on Katie.


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## Knave

It sounds like you’re doing good with her still! 

I’m with @knightrider. It might be a really good deal for you, but it’s very important you watch the girl ride. I’d like to see how her horses work for her too. There are plenty of professionals I know who win quite a few things that, although I might enjoy their company and even listen to a few bits of advice, I would never want them on my horses. Their horses dislike them, and it is for good reason too.


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## tinyliny

I think the focus on heels down is a jumper thing. In s dressage or western saddle it is less imporant.


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## tinyliny

Oh, it's HOT where you are?? Already? You are n the northern hemisphere, right? I'm amazed because most everywhere has been so cold this spring


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## mmshiro

"Heels down" is a byproduct of your legs' being heavy and relaxed, so you are sitting deep in the saddle. It is not a mark of a good rider in itself. Focus on your *thighs* dropping into the earth, and the heels will come down automatically. Tense up your legs, and they will come up correspondingly. One of the hardest things to learn when riding is to separate the half of the muscles that's relaxed from the other half that's toned.


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## Kalraii

@knightrider, @Knave @tinyliny and @mmshiro TY for the replies. I feel I over-selled myself. I cannot even keep an even heel, much less heels down. Often I am reaching with my toes, heels up even with jumper lengths/any length. Any kind of movement makes it easy for me to get my tiny foot through the ENTIRE. STIRRUP. The stirrups are standard size but I have disproportionately small feet/ankles. I wear solid dublins just for ease. In trot and canter I am ALWAYS focusing on correcting one foot's positioning at any one time because if I don't ONE of them will end up through the stirrup 100%. When I've fixed one, the other goes. All this faffing and distraction makes for a miserable time and Katie is honestly so patient with me. I didn't have as much of an issue on the schoolies but I think that's because they paced themselves.


*Update on Sharer Lady*


- sharer lady is very mature, super nice and clearly passionate
- you can clearly see she needs some one on one horsey time and not just in the saddle
- rides good, better than me by a long shot. nice jumping. Still struggled to get Katie on correct canter lead as kept hanging onto the inside rein, making her fall out. Instructor pointed this out and several tries later problem solved. Found really interesting as I'd never have picked up on WHY... I love my instructor bit more. 
- praises Katie a lot <3
- knows a lot of technical stuff that's beyond me
- appears to worry about being tanked off with (bolting)
- dislikes Katie having a hard mouth, suggested I change bit or use a grackle nose band - commented on how she rode her previous, very smart horse in a pelham
- goal is to get back into show jumping, possibly with Katie depending on my own goals
- taken aback by my lack of horse gear and bling bling grooming supplies 
- realised my o'natural, "I like to let my grey horse roll in the mud right before a lesson" approach. was a bit taken aback. expression priceless. instructor complaints worth it <3
- bathed Katie together, talked about her non-existent vices and was very relaxed!


So in response all the above I am only reserved about her take on bits and her goals. I said very bluntly I am not changing Katie's d-ring snaffle and I am actually planning on trying her without a nose band next time I ride. She's not been ridden without one so it's current functionality is unknown. Aesthetically I prefer less, than more. I'd like to work through Katie's issues via training not short-cutting with harsher gear. I don't think I could have made my opinion on it clearer (feel bit bad). As for show jumping I also said that personally, that's not my goal and Katie still considers jump poles to be bread-sticks not even worthy of a fart despite proving at times she can jump high and she CAN jump VERY WELL. Lazy bum. When the time comes (if) and she'd like to enter a competition with Katie I'm all for tagging along ofc. But I also made it clear that I will never consider letting Katie being intensively trained and jumped week in, week out, days on end. NEVER. It was maybe a little embarrassing admitting that I don't have a lot of fancy stuff or gear to groom with. I'm just very pragmatic like that and not into bling. Exception being the zebra rug. She's gonna look fab! >.<

So we agreed on a two day a week share and take it week by week. She'll ride Katie for 30mins schooling and can hack her out down the short on-site trail after, if she's comfortable. Grooming ofc is part of the deal as don't we all enjoy that?! Overall I actually think that she and Katie will get on great even though our goals don't align. I imagine there might be a lack of choice on the sharer market right now. If another horse came along, better trained/built and with an owner enthusiastic about the jump scene... who knows eh?  In terms of affection for Katie though, we're the same. She apparently, as a rider, never got to even see Katie's stall so really missed being able to give a proper thanks for the ride. Thought that was sweet x

Let the trial begin!


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## Kalraii

UPDATE TIME. 


Well... nothing too interesting has happened. The sharer is away on holiday this week and it will start up next week. The wife is riding REALLY well now. I cannot even begin to tell you how much she has progressed. She's actually, from a riding perspective, going to overtake me soon. I'm happy for her though. I know that my skills lie elsewhere or it'll just take me longer. I'll get there. The horse that bucked her husband off? It's her favourite and with good reason; that little pony is a mover and tries for the right person. Speaking of the husband... he's now back home for a holiday (another country) and apparently is going to be riding out there with the macho male coach. I'm happy for him if that is what it takes to regain confidence. I hope when he returns he won't give up! 

Tomorrow I'm riding Katie. It's more a cardio workout for me LOL. I've actually bought an elliptical because I have plantar fasciitis from the horrible hospital flooring. I legit can barely walk after a shift and need to wear night splints. I could walk all day over a farm but hospital concrete? Kills me. Sometimes I work 14 hours with 30 mins break with only 15 of those sitting. My fitbit is usually 50k+ steps on a work day. Not including the hour travel either way. No trainers allowed. It's ruining my feet and joints. So I'm gonna try get my cardio up with an elliptical/cross trainer. Hoping it's foot friendly!!!!!! Or... I should just ride Katie more haha. Once I'm qualified I'm taking a job that requires more skill and less foot work, I swear.

On FRIDAY the friend/wife and I are riding at the countryside school we used to go to, a long drive away. We are going for a semi-private, one hour schooling and one hour hacking. Wife has already bluntly put out she looks forward to competing against me now she can canter... inward cringe as I'm really not competitive in that way. I'm really not a bragger or smug and have done everything to help her improve. I just don't understand what I've done to encourage her thinking of me like competition? >.< Anyway, it's just a fun horse ride to me. The weather is going to be beautiful. Watch me happily mount the horses there. With Katie... who now stands lovely, I'm still anxious. What is wrong with me? I JUST WANT TO RIDE MY HORSE! AND SHE'S PERFECT! 

Boyfriend and I have watched maybe 10 hours of extreme cross country, grand prix show jumping and dressage in the last 48 hours. Turns out we're BOTH saddos haha. I've never watched so much. And this might seem strange but I find it MUCH EASIER to spot things. It was for fun but I have really learned a lot out of nowhere lol. And then I realised... Katie has only just turned 8 years old. Some of these horses are late teens! She has so much ahead of her. What a baby. 

It also had us thinking of show names. We decided "sorry not sorry" because I like a dirty grey and Katie don't give a dayum about breadstick barriers (jumps). Probably has been used before but hey whey.

EDIT: we also came up with the show name "50 Shades of Neigh". For the record, we hate the franchise ****. Just think its funny!


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## tinyliny

Love Fifty Shades of Neigh!!! you have to use that one.


your feelings toward this friend come out in your writing, and make me furrow my brow. I feel confused, because the 'friend' part of this friendship is a bit vague to me. I guess it's one of those things . . . . you gotta be there.


I am always nervous at mounting. It's when we are our most vulnerable. But, a lot can be done to get a horse to stand better at the block. But , it takes time, and most of us just want to get on and ride.

I hope you have a wonderful lesson at the old school. That sounds like so much fun.

on my part, I am heading down to Souther Oregon in midmay and will spend just two night on a guest ranch there. I am booked for a 4 hour ride out into the sagebrush and hills, near the Steens Mountains. This is where the Kiger Mustangs come from. We may see them , coursing over the hills!


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## Kalraii

@tinyliny I will. I am still giggling about it now. I could barely breathe before when it popped in my head. Thing is I won't be showing Katie any time soon. My sharer will, likely. She's a classy rider and I cannot wait for that name to be called out LOL. As for friend. I suppose she's not such a huge hindrance or inconvenience for me to do anything about it. I feel like I'm doing my own thing and she's welcome to tag along as long as it doesn't impede me. Even still, I cannot help but interested in her progress. I think it's just amazing to watch someone with zero horse experience come how far she has. Must be the best feeling as an instructor to see something click. 

And I'm so jealous. I have never been on a horse holiday but after seeing you and others here talk about them it is going to HAVE to be thing. Are you allowed to take pictures out there of the mustangs? That's gonna be surreal if you encounter them. Wild horses.... crazy to think I can't find any in England. Please take pictures while you're away. Tho I don't blame if you if you don't - sometimes get so immersed forget about technology!


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## egrogan

You seem to enjoy unmounted work with Katie, so maybe you'll be interested in this approach to teaching a horse to stand for mounting:
https://www.trtmethod.com/trial-video-getting-on-the-magical-way/

I'm not much for the "celebrity trainers" but do often learn useful tips from Tristan Tucker. I particularly like this approach to mounting but have to be honest I haven't invested the time with my own horse 

And for a good laugh, check out his spoof alter ego "Brett Kidding"





He (and Brett :wink have got a whole YouTube channel and a bunch of videos on the TRTMethod Facebook page if you like what you see!


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## Acadianartist

Too bad you can't wear better shoes at work! Sounds like it's killing your feet. 

As for your friend, I know the feeling. The horsey couple that I hang out with has been taking lessons every week all winter long with my daughter's coach, who is tough! The woman is especially good, as she was a natural from the start, much like your friend. We've actually become pretty good friends. But in terms of riding, although I haven't seen her ride, I think she's probably ahead of me now. Which is nuts right? Because I have horses in my BACKYARD! I can ride anytime I want! Except, not really. Having horses means you're responsible for their care. In my case, I spend most of my time looking after them rather than riding. It also means I'm more interested in building a relationship with Kodak - just like you're building one with Katie - whereas people who do lessons are focused on riding alone. Why would they create a relationship with a horse that isn't theirs? So while part of me is envious, most of me is grateful that I have the whole experience of ownership. And I'm no more competitive than you are, so I don't care. But I understand you completely. I wish I was a better rider, but cleaning stalls, scrubbing buckets, giving medication, cleaning hooves, all that stuff comes before riding for me. 

And as for the fear, well, I can relate to that too. There's this girl that lives up the road, she's like 18. Her grandfather gave her a colt when she was about 13. She "trained" the colt herself, with expected results. Numerous concussions ensued, broken bones, near death. Yet on a regular basis, I see her ride past my house, on our rural road where logging trucks fly by! (we're on a hill and they get quite the momentum coming down) She's not wearing a helmet of course. In fact, yesterday, I saw her casually texting while riding her horse up the road in traffic. Of course, the mature adult in me is indignant. But there's a tiny part of me that envies her. She is clearly not afraid. She falls down, gets back up, and moves on. Unless she dies, of course, which is the part that gets me. Thinking about riding Kodak down the road like that, I can't help but think about everything that could go wrong. I wish I didn't but there it is. 

Yet, I have just gone and signed up for a horse riding tour around Rome in mid-June as a getaway from a work trip. It's an all-day ride (with meal breaks which I'm hoping are going to be nice and long, and well seasoned with many kinds of booze). I don't know what I'm thinking. But I feel like this will be a ride I'll never forget. 

So yeah, I dunno, I'm sort of all over the place I guess, but I meant to just say that I understand where you're coming from. You're doing great with Katie, and you have something special with her that goes beyond riding skills. We all have those fears too, and I think it's completely rational. After all, we're hopping on these 1000 lbs animals just hoping a rabbit won't jump out and make them lose their minds. 

And yes, Fifty shades of neigh is awesome!


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## tinyliny

Oh, this is not really a 'horsey vacation' . I wish! just two days, one ride out. the chance of seeing the wild horses is slim. But, that's ok.
I'm a city girl, so doing this sort of thing is exciting to me. I mentioned to the head wrangler, when making the reservations by phone, that while I am a decent enough rider, I can't mount any equine from the ground. He said, "oh, that's ok. more than half our riders can't mount from the ground. God has sprinkled mounting blocks all around in the form of big rocks!"

Thank God.

Oh, and for PF (plantar faciatis) . . . I dealt with this nightmare, years ago. I still have it, but it is carefully managed. I went through multiple custom orthotics, not to mention all the over the counter gadgets one could find. I iced my foot daily x2 or 3, changed shoes regularly, elevated feet, stretched incessantly, wore night splints, day boots, had injections right through the sole of my foot into the heel, etc. etc. . . . 

I was miserable for the better part of 2 years. 

I finally found an orthopedist who KNEW feet and made GOOD orhtotics for me, I stopped wearing Birkenstocks or any negative heel shoe, wore my custom orthotic for 90% of all shoe use, and, for around the house I wore Haflinger slippers, whose wonderful compressed felt shoebed is light but supportive. I froze oranges and rolled them under my barefeet when I was sitting at the computer. And, I did excersize with my toes to start to build up the toes strenght. And, I wore Dansko clogs if I wasn't wearing my trainers. I eschewed any very soft sole shoe, except the slippers, in the home.


Now, I can walk barefoot for short periods of time and have almos zero pain in the mornging. if I neglect myself too much, however, it comes roaring back. Once your feet are super inflamed, it is hard to fix them, so the best advice is not to EVER allow them to get too enflamed.


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## Kalraii

tinyliny said:


> Oh, this is not really a 'horsey vacation' . I wish! just two days, one ride out. the chance of seeing the wild horses is slim. But, that's ok.
> I'm a city girl, so doing this sort of thing is exciting to me. I mentioned to the head wrangler, when making the reservations by phone, that while I am a decent enough rider, I can't mount any equine from the ground. He said, "oh, that's ok. more than half our riders can't mount from the ground. God has sprinkled mounting blocks all around in the form of big rocks!"
> 
> Thank God.


Oh gods I just died. This is just SPOT. ON. I have the excuse that Katie is too big but reality is I probably would fail on a 15hh knowing me. I remember jumping from the ground into the saddle. Younger me used to turn around MID-TROT to face backwards. I think it's still amazing. I've never gone for a FULL day outing much less a dedicated ride like that. I just know it's gonna be amazing.

I am so glad that someone can relate about PF. I often get told "oh everyone gets sore feet" YEAH BUT NOT LIKE THIS! I want to scream at them. I will 100% be using oranges tonight. I have tried so many insoles and I'm naturally good at "networking" so I've managed to find myself a doctor from plastics to help refer me. By the end of my shift my entire hips, back and neck are stiff from walking so ginger. I have actually sat on the floor of the London underground during rush horu on the picadilly line in the middle of summer because I just could not stand a second longer. People really gave me some weird looks.


----------------------------

TY @egrogan I am watching it right now. Probably a few more times. Thing is Katie can stand at the block and will stand while you fiddle with straps. She's over that whole GOTTA run phase. It's just me. I KNOW I can get on. The saddle wont slip, she wont run off.... but I'm always frozen. I feel like over thinking it has just exacerbated what is just a simple move >.< Anything helps tho! That "dressage" vid is hilarious haha so cool to see the fun side xD

----------------------------

@Acadianartist see? Another horse holiday. This stuff is infectious haha. Rome is like a stones throw... I'll eagerly await your review! I've wondered what it must be like to be able to properly relax when hacking out and not worry about the next rabbit or demon popping out the bush. Fortunately I haven't ridden that sort of horse in years - it must be exhausting but incredibly rewarding in itself. And yeah I'm on the fence about that brave colt-breaking chick near you. But then she will grow up to be the sort of horse woman that has gotten away with so much that she'll advise everyone takes the same risks >.<


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## Kalraii

*TODAY'S UPDATE:*

Because I like chunky posts >.< 

I was late thanks to traffic. Not only that but Katie was out in the field (normally they bring her in for me out of niceness since travelling is such a bum). So I had to run in knee deep mud to fetch her as it was so windy and she was so far away. Once I got there she was like "OH HAI!!!" She accepted her bit willingly and we had to tack up super fast :< But instructor is amazing and we did the full half hour anyway in the indoor school because terrible weather.

*The Ride:* For the first time in many weeks I rode with longer stirrups and about 70% of the time kept them in place. Naturally. How amazing is that?! I've been doing some yoga like I've been told many times and using an exercise ball. A week's worth has helped. I was far less stiff in my hips. However, I have developed a new habit YAY. I now lean forward into a canter transition. A new thing for me. So basically... I got told off for galloping Katie around the arena. At one point the instructor asked if I was OK, I assume she meant about the speed haha. Katie is very balanced in the canter *cough* gallop, so the corners weren't a problem. BUT throughout the entire ride she hung onto the right rein. The instructor said that by now Katie should have improved her straightness and if anything, it's gotten worse. The vet was around today and instructor and I rushed to grab her to check Katie's teeth. They had been done before I bought her in jan and the PPE had cleared her. I didn't think 4 months would be enough but....

*THE VET: *... turns out her mouth was not only a mess but also uneven everywhere. There is some chipping and a finger gap between one too. She also spotted that the articulate joint by her right eye was 2x the size of her left. She immediately said that "this horse must have had some serious handbrakes put on her" as apparently that's a common result. Or it could be some previous trauma. Katie shows absolutely zero pain at being messed with, though. The only thing that led to all this was the instructor having a "feeling" that something with her mouth just wasn't right. I am so relieved and grateful to have people nearby that can help with these observations. Who knows how much longer I might have left it if I was on my own? 

Katie is sedated (got called a cheap drunk LOL) and they get to it with what I assume is an electric bevel? If that's the correct term. Poor Katie wearing some torture device. She also lets me have a feel inside her mouth and really educated me about this stuff. Very interesting. Anyway... she said we need to pay extra special attention for any signs of a hidden abscess in general. Also if a few weeks down the road doesn't improve in her straightness/hanging on the right rein then we need to do some more investigation into the enlarged joint. We'll only know which one is the cause of her discomfort after a few weeks. She asked if I was insured. Yes. But a little apprehension about the whole thing. I'm a bit peeved that nothing was brought up in her PPE but maybe this really has happened in the last 4 months. IDK.

After all was done and it was just a recovering Katie and I she got very clingy. If I went out of sight she actually neighed! I've never heard her whinny EVER. So I go back to her and she immediately puts her head on my shoulder. All of her weight. A proper, drug induced cuddle LOL. Boy she has a heavy neck and head. Anyway I did my best to console her, changing sides frequently. She was like a bit fat baby afterwards haha. Very cute. I had to leave but she's in good hands. The yard manager helped a lot and will be giving her some pain relief (at vets instruction) with her feed. SO new random discovery. 

What a stoic creature. No other sign that she was in discomfort other than hanging on the right rein int he saddle. Just watching her eat or messing with her face... she told me nothing. I better know now for future. Pictures coming!


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## Kalraii

And the pictures!


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## Kalraii

I just realised... if you look at the last picture head on you can see how big it is over her right eye. It's likely worse because of having her mouth jammed open, too. Hm.


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## Kalraii

I went to hang out with Katie today. Got just in time for her 2nd and last lesson of the day. The instructor, upon seeing me, immediately came over to apologise. Apparently the rider was novice - barely knew how to hold the reins. But when she booked had claimed to be an advanced rider. Turns out she'd backyard ridden a few times but has never had a lesson in her life. She was a nice woman and tried her best. It was also a good way to see how Katie coped. She was confused, but she wasn't stressed. The worst that happened was that when the lady stopped asking with her legs she just stopped. Nothing dramatic. No swishing tail, no pinning ears, no prancing. She just stood there like an innocent little horsey that wants a bit of direction. It can't be easy being a novice on a horse that needs you to tell her what to do at every moment. In spite of all this it was still a SAFE ride. Good girl! What was also cute was I went to go pick her poo up mid lesson and she immediately tried to come over to me. I felt loved even though it was probably more a plea haha. 

She had an advanced ride this same morning. Instructor said that she was already much straighter since getting her teeth done and is much faster to respond to contact - she definitely thinks this was the issue before and partially to blame for her running through the contact in an attempt to get away. She's still stiff on the right but she probably needs time to get out of that habit. I am maybe a little mad that her teeth were cleared in her PPE - I was RIGHT THERE when he checked her teeth and said they were fine! And yet this other vet said the growth was well beyond the 4 months as claimed. Whatever, past is past. Wont ever happen again. 

But... today I noticed more snot from her right nostril. I'd noticed it last week, too. It only happens occasionally but it happens at least ONCE while I'm there and only ever out of her right nostril. The staff haven't noticed anything but they dont spend hours just staring at her, either. I just cannot help but feel something is up. It might not be anything immediate but could be the start of something... But why would only her right nostril leak every now and then? It doesn't make sense. But I will be chasing it up anyway. 

While Katie was eating her dinner I went and watched one of the young volunteers ride his share horse. In the half hour I sat there I watched a recently gelded thing in a nearby field, with his owner watching, spook and try jump a metal gate: he didn't clear it, it looked like it hurt and he hit it with such force the gate busted open! Luckily the yard manager was right next to me and he will be OK. Moments just before that a tiny little lovely lady lost control of her huge cob thing. Yard manager rescued her, too. Apparently that's normal! And moments before that the same yard manager was returning from a hack, exercising a stallion bareback and he got badly spooked by the spooky recently-gelded-nutter and semi-reared/took off with her down the yard. Her butt never moved and it was impressive how well she sat that. Moments _before_ that another lady on her mare, bareback, came by to say hi to spooky gelding. But a rider had just got off a different gelding who was spooking circles around her. They spooked each other and she had to direct her mare down the nearby field. And all the while the young rider on his share horse... was cantering serenely around. But apparently his share horse dislikes having her flash tucked away so much that she'll buck you off! 

Exciting stuff LOL. All in the day at a livery yard >.< 

As for my friend THE WIFE, she's booked a lesson through working livery to ride Katie! This is completely independent of me. So will see what happens, though she definitely rides better than the novice earlier.


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## Kalraii

And here she is looking cute! Some people have commented that she looks like she's lost some weight. I think she has but that she looks good right as she is. She's developing good muscle too, now, especially along her top-line and shoulder, filling out what was one hollow.


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## Acadianartist

I love her wide-eyed alert look! She looks like she's expecting you to do something... or reward her for posing so nicely. 

I don't know how your yard manager does it. That sounds pretty stressful to me!


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## Fimargue

I just want to kiss that pinky nose  So god **** cute!

Right, Sweetie, you really should not start stressing about every snotty nose, or weeping eye - it happens, just like for us. Doesn't mean there is something wrong with her health wise.  

I think I forgot to thank you for your kind comment on my videos, my depression has taken a toll, life is stressful and I'm a bit absent minded. Thank you for your kind words!
@egrogan, that video! I haven't laughed like this in a long time. Probably all of as have tried to start canter like that at some point, leaning forward and pushing the horse in to canter.

This one as well :lol: "Don't get all nervous on me... no spooking... don't look at the pot plants" LOL.





And then there is his alter ego Hans von Sausage Slinger, the traditional German trainer. lol :mrgreen:


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## egrogan

@Fimargue- not going to lie, I've spent way more time than I care to admit laughing my way through the Brett Kidding videos. I wish more of the full TRT Method training videos were available on YouTube as I can't quite bring myself to pay for the subscription, but I get why he does that. What I've seen has been very helpful though. My BO/trainer rode with him once when he was in the states and said he was an amazing teacher- which I take as high praise from her as she's probably the best teacher of adults I've encountered.


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## Fimargue

egrogan said:


> @Fimargue- not going to lie, I've spent way more time than I care to admit laughing my way through the Brett Kidding videos. I wish more of the full TRT Method training videos were available on YouTube as I can't quite bring myself to pay for the subscription, but I get why he does that. What I've seen has been very helpful though. My BO/trainer rode with him once when he was in the states and said he was an amazing teacher- which I take as high praise from her as she's probably the best teacher of adults I've encountered.


I was laughing my *** off and called my OH to watch as well when he was nearby and he was like ":icon_rolleyes: I think only horse people can understand the joke..." Bless him, he has a long way to go. He is trying very hard to digest all the dressage vocabulary that comes out of my mouth.

Tristan is not only making fun of the stereotypes in the discipline, but also of our development as riders. I'm trying to be less uptight about my progress, as it's all a journey.


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## Kalraii

TY @Fimargue you're probably right about my paranoia haha. Sorry to hear about your woes :'< Adulting is just SO much fun isn't it? And thanks for the link - I was dying when I finally realised it was a goof. I sent it to my partner and he said unless I'd pointed out things he would haven't had known until the dude mentioned the sandwich haha! It has led me down a youtube rabbit hole >.<

*UPDATE:*

So I spent all afternoon at the yard. I really love the staff there, just had to emphasise again. Katie has now been moved to a new stable next to the other lesson/working livery horses as it was such a trek to tack her up. Remember she's only doing 4 half hour lessons a week. The wife joined me as her husband is currently away. She helped me move all her stuff to her new tack room. Boy it was hot and sweaty today. She'd asked if she could ride Katie earlier. I did um and ask the YM. The yard manager offered to be around to supervise and for that reason alone I agreed. So I tacked Katie up and wife got on. She remarked at how different and calm Katie was compared to last time. But then again, she has also improved in herself. 

We went into the nicest outdoor arena with an amazing country view. The yard manager was right behind me. The wife wanted (and needs) instruction as she's never schooled or ridden alone. I felt incredibly awkward because I feel so utterly under qualified to. The yard manager very kindly pointed out things I could mention and reminded me that I know the basics and should be more than capable for just that. Anyway, once she deemed the ride safe she wished us well and left us to our own devices. 

So I ended up "teaching" my first impromptu lesson ****. Katie was an angel and communication was far smoother than compared to the other novice lady from yesterday (not meant negatively, just a comparison). She's also a million times straighter since her teeth being done which the instructor had confirmed earlier. The wife who normally rides 13hh ponies coz she's such a small woman, found Katie's trot very hard to adjust to haha. We worked a bit more on understanding the diagonal (which she seems to forget every lesson). I just sort of mimicked exercises that the instructor gives to me, feeling a bit self-conscious about it all and wondering at the millions of details I'm completely missing out on. And since everything was going so well I didn't see any reason why she couldn't at least try a canter. 

Well left/worse lead was a disaster and she just wasn't transitioning correctly, having only cantered a few times in her life recently. So I got her to change the rein and as Katie walked past me, looking me in the eye, I said "I want you to CANTER girl!". And boom the next corner she popped into canter immediately. I know she knows the word because of her schooling haha. It was just funny how she understood the word a lot more than the cue given by the wife. Anyway the first canter was awful - it was a desperate potato-two point, sniff the mane position _thing._ Katie couldn't give two hoots though and wasn't fazed. I told the wife to forget about steering and just to sit back. And the next canter is the absolute best I have seen from her. Her butt was glued to the seat and it looked natural! She screamed out (literally screaming at the top of her lungs) "I can feel it! I'm cantering!". I face-palmed, glad that Katie wasn't a spooker. When she finally came to a stop she showed me how badly her hands were shaking from the thrill of it. I don't think I've ever seen the wife so happy before. Now she knows what feeling she is aiming for. 

And afterwards we had the very adult conversation about how she should not expect me to let her ride Katie for free as a regular thing. That if she wants to share her at some point in the future she is welcome to but otherwise I'd like her to be trained by the instructor officially. It was a bit awkward but she said she understands my point of view. At least this means she can actually be instructed here now, where she was refused before. The privates paid off massively. And even though I was very reserved initially, I really enjoyed watching her success and seeing how wonderfully Katie handled it all.

-------------------------------------

We bathed Katie together, hand grazed her and gave her lots of loving afterwards. She really isn't keen on being bathed. She tolerates it amazingly but I can't say she _enjoys_ it haha. And that's that. I can't see her tomorrow, BOOooooooooo!


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## Fimargue

Kalraii said:


> TY @Fimargue you're probably right about my paranoia haha. Sorry to hear about your woes :'< *Adulting is just SO much fun isn't it*? And thanks for the link - I was dying when I finally realised it was a goof. I sent it to my partner and he said unless I'd pointed out things he would haven't had known until the dude mentioned the sandwich haha! It has led me down a youtube rabbit hole >.<


Yes, SO much. 

I had a person interested in buying my other mare and wasted my time for 11 days because he just couldn't organise the god **** transport! Then when *I* would have found him a transport, no answer. So typically French.

Hah, I know that Youtube rabbit hole very well lol.


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## knightrider

You know what I don't understand about those Brett Kidding's videos? How he gets that horse to perform so beautifully when he is riding so horribly! The rest of us ride the very very best we possibly can every minute just TRYING to get our horses to do some sort of semblance of what we want. We are told the horse isn't doing it right because we're not doing it right. And there is Brett Kidding doing EVERYTHING wrong, and his horse performs perfectly. He must be amazing . . . or his horse is.


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## egrogan

knightrider said:


> You know what I don't understand about those Brett Kidding's videos? How he gets that horse to perform so beautifully when he is riding so horribly! The rest of us ride the very very best we possibly can every minute just TRYING to get our horses to do some sort of semblance of what we want. We are told the horse isn't doing it right because we're not doing it right. And there is Brett Kidding doing EVERYTHING wrong, and his horse performs perfectly. He must be amazing . . . or his horse is.



Right?! I think it's part amazing horse, and part, if you watch his legs and seat carefully, he's generally riding very quietly below while exaggerating and flopping around up top. I can only think that the horse just rides exceptionally well off seat and leg and ignores all the other silliness.


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## Kalraii

@knightrider - I agree. I can't pace a trot and LOOK AT WHAT HE DOES ****. 


UPDATE:

So I didn't ride last week. I am having a rough time though I have been so obsessed with being a new horse mum that I've been too distracted to write it out. I am dealing with my mums(nans) death well enough, to be honest. I'm glad she's not suffering anymore though I desperately wish she hadn't continually put off living her life because she was scared of people judging her for using a walking stick and, later on, an electric chair. She always told me "when I'm better". Well, she never got better and poof everything came to a truly horrendous, bloody end. With every death, both animal and human, that I am a part of I lose a little of myself. I feel older beyond my years but with it also comes freedom. Freedom to not give a **** what people think about me, even more than before. Not that I need to give a hoot about anyone else because no one else can be mean to myself like me! >.<

Financially things are tight. I have my savings but I don't include those as they are for emergencies, literally. When my mum died my mother(biological, but was 14 when she had me) are left with a 5 bedroom, 3 bathroom house with two garages and a decent garden. Now that doesn't seem a lot especially to those of you over the ocean with masses of land. But in London... it is a financial sinkhole. We lost a third of our combined income PLUS my mother is unable/cannot/will not go back to full time work due to depression. I'm bummed. Remember, I have a lot of other animals and veterinary bills, too. It's a ticking time bomb. Now, I paid off over half the mortgage a decade ago when my mum was forced into retirement for disability but the current monthly bills... I won't even mention the number. So we're converting it into 6 flats and planning on using the income to buy another house OUT OF THE CITY! When my partner and I can finally settle I'll be renting my half of that new house and off to Switzerland I go! And another horse XD Gotta keep the goal in sight!

Who knew that converting a house into multiple flats was a nightmare? We don't have money to throw at this project. I sold my really nice brand new car to give a cash boost and am now sharing a banger. My mother is refusing to work more than a few hours babysitting a week - she's severely depressed. This month I have been youtubing guides on how to lay out a new floor, plumb a sink. I've bought and used jigsaws for the first time and nearly killed myself 3. I have been laying down new support beams and sistering the ones I couldn't remove. We had really bad wood rot and fungus underneath the boiler though the leak was inside the wall... that's sorted. Got an electrician in to separate the electrics for Flat number 1. Once he's done that I can lay the floor down, fit the kitchen, get council clearance and we're good to go! Use the income from flat 1 to do flat 2. I am really slow, it being flat number 1 and all and my first time doing this. I've wasted a lot of mats in getting cuts wrong or not checking with a level (eurgh!). But I know now. It's gonna get easier and I'm realising that these new skills I'm learning are great!

But I still have to study.

And work.

I feel a bit overwhelmed right now but this is time sensitive. And you know what? I just wanna go to the yard, tack Katie up and go for a ride. But I realised recently that I am pretty self-conscious about it. And not what anyone else thinks. Sometimes the metaphorical "elephant in the room" is ME lol. I've also spent zero time mounting her because I've not been riding. I have this vision of me putting my foot in the stirrup and her taking off (which she USED to do lol but not anymore) and my foot being trapped and dragged along. Has it ever happened? No. Does she give me reason to think she will? Nope. And yet this thought persists. So the little time I do go there I don't ride. What's wrong with me? :S


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## knightrider

Awww, I feel really bad that you are going through such a tough time. And everything you do is amazing. I think you are a pretty amazing person. I read about all the cool things you have done, and think that is pretty awesome.


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## Acadianartist

Yes, I can see how all that would be totally overwhelming. It's ok, let yourself feel it. You are dealing with so, so much. You don't have to ride right now. Give yourself time. Being with Katie is therapeutic. Free yourself from the feeling that if you don't ride, you're not accomplishing enough. Right now, where you are in your life, you just need some down time from it all, not more stress. 

Meantime, you are continuing to build a great relationship with this horse, and TRUST me when I say it WILL all pay off in the end. 

Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying you shouldn't push yourself a little eventually and have a few good rides to overcome your fears. But now is probably not that time. Riding when you're rushed, stressed, under a lot of tension, and frankly, forcing yourself to do it, isn't conducive to good, positive experiences. That time will come for you, I believe it. 

Keep your chin up. This too shall pass.


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## Dragoon

Acadian said it all so well...you are doing amazing, and finding solutions to what life is throwing at you! 
You just have to survive it! 

I just had to comment on the stirrup thing. 
When I started riding four years ago, I was going with a neighbour. She told me about her fear of getting a foot stuck, and being dragged. This comment must have stayed with me, as I have never used a stirrup to get on past my second lesson. We always use a mounting block, and most of the time I can throw a leg over and just slide on. With horses too tall to do this, I vault on to my stomach, then swing a leg over. 

I don't think about it anymore, its the only way I get on. Until I see someone stick a foot in and climb a horse like a ladder. Its seems so offensive, putting that much torque on the delicate skin of a horse's belly. 

I was in martial arts for years. One of the training exercises we did was to partner someone. One person would be on all fours, and the other would grip them about the waist and haul themselves over their back, and come back. (Super difficult to describe!) It was fantastic for using your abs. You can't do very many of these. But the torque and pull on the person's waist, who is on all fours is a LOT!!! So I know EXACTLY how the horse feels, and its super uncomfortable. I will not do that to a horse, period. 

And it has the added safety bonus that if the horse DID move away suddenly, I am on my stomach, and will just slide off onto my feet.


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## jaydee

We had quite a lot of adults who were first time horse owners at the yard I managed and most of them seemed to throw themselves in at the deep end and aimed way higher than they needed too. I'm not sure if they felt they had to do that because they were surrounded by 12 year olds who already seemed so proficient and confident or 'just because'. 

@Kalraii - I think you're work so hard at this whole horse ownership thing that you deserve to succeed but taking a step back to just enjoy having that lovely horse isn't going to make you fail. Deep breath in and then breath out slowly and feel that relaxation sweep through you!! You can do this.


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## Kalraii

TY @knightrider @Acadianartist @Dragoon and @jaydee. I did read what you guys wrote but I've had some exhausting days when I sit down I just HAVE to go to bed. It was very comforting to read your support and know that I needn't pressure myself beyond my comfort zone while I'm not ready. In fact, I've just decided to take it at my pace and not what I THINK my pace should be...

I booked a lesson today. Katie has just moved to her summer field and is loving her 24/7 turnout (does come in for feeds). She's LOVING it. She's hasn't been ridden since last Friday so plus her new field arrangement she was *fresh.* The kind when you're trying to trot but she's basically cantering under you. Y'know, the kind when you turn her and she's falling out and practically running sideways? Took us about 10 minutes to get her focus. I was glad the wife wasn't riding today heh. Apparently someone else fell off her recently and AGAIN because of a canter > trot transition. Got bounced off her ****. There was another rider in the arena with us, riding independently. Unfortunately she didn't know schooling etiquette and we nearly crashed 3 times. I am just used to the whole left-hand to left-hand but she kept trying to be on the inside. I was cantering and she decided to turn her stationary horse 180 on the track, me nearly crashing into her butt. Finally instructor stepped in and explained to the other rider the "rules". 

We did some canter work and I am very proud - I had one canter where I actually kept my stirrups perfect on the balls of my feet, no funny business. So I CAN do it. I just can't do it consistently. But then my instructor wanted to further torture me with lots more cantering and I remembered what you guys said - so I told her no thanks, I wanted to end the lesson on that good note. I wasn't comfortable to push myself further. So Katie and I went out on a hack.

I had a very short canter on some even ground and nearly got taken out by a branch. It didn't look that low from that distance. I had a deer in headlights moment of "oh CRAP". I could have stopped in time but I froze lol. I ducked the last second and have a long scrape on my back. But I was laughing while it was happening and she wasn't bothered. I caught my sunglasses with my left hand at the same moment. I'm sure if anyone else was there they would be shaking their head at me haha. I wondered if I'd be able to stop her... and she stopped perfect. I am waiting for the eventual true bolt I'll experience at some point on her.... 

It was SO nice to spend time with her alone. The last few visits have been with other people. I really needed this and feel better for it. It was obviously good for her as well as she was a very happy horse throughout. The best part was that I was able to get her to take a treat from the saddle. Not a habit I want to encourage BUT before she was so obviously shut down/zoned out to realise I was talking to her. The return walk home it was more like a dog walk, letting her sniff around and eat some grass. Very nice! x


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> I had a very short canter on some even ground and nearly got taken out by a branch. /*snip*/


I so wish I could go out on a ride with you - you sound like my kind of riding buddy. It's those "Look what I survived today!" moments that I live for...  Because it's always something that "just happens" (usually wildlife or terrain related) and never anything I can really blame the horse for, I'm never discouraged from going out again.

I can sense the joy you are experiencing from here - there is no doubt that your horse can, too.


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## Acadianartist

Glad to hear you feel good about your time with Katie! That's the important part. I know it's hard to remember it -- I just finished a lesson where I had a couple of horrible sideways canters on Kodak. It's like her steering just goes at the canter. Meantime, my daughter and Harley are jumping and cantering circles around us, lol. Oh well... the important thing is that we are out spending time with our horses! 

But I do find that if I ride alone, we are both a lot more relaxed. We learn more during lessons though so... it's a balancing act. 

Very happy to hear you having one on one time with Katie, and deciding to do things at your own pace.


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## Kalraii

Katie is a very happy horse. VERY happy. Extra happy. And fresh haha. I had a later lesson tonight at 7.30pm. I forgot to get a picture of her new, extra comfy bridle - looks flashy as well. The noseband has a crank which I'm not a fan of but the noseband itself fits nicely and is very comfortable. It wont be cranked in the literal sense, of course.

I was forced to mount with quite a gap - I didn't know I could be so athletic. But I was literally told to get on or go home lol >.< Was fine, again, no idea why I get worried >.< We learned today that Katie respects gates. I tried to urge her to open the school gate for me , which was unlocked and ajar may I add, but NOPE. This huge creature was defied by a semi-open gate. And once we're in the arena she's snorting and looking down the huge hill beyond and at her herd. One of her girls called out across the wind. _Thanks._

Every time we faced the field (which was very far away) she was extra fast. You try pace yourself on a bouncing machine!!!!!!! The tendons in my inner thigh were still aching from Tuesday's ride reminding me I need to ride more. I did flatwork with jump stirrups LOL. But it was 100x easier to keep them. When she was closer to the field she basically forgot I was there so we did some work on regaining her focus and getting bend. Then we did some canter work... did I say canter? I also meant gallop. Coz we gallop towards the field and canter away from it LOL. PS this arena is HUGE. It's OK though we started doing some circles instead and she got the message: _stop. galloping. in. the. arena._ She is still occasionally struggling to strike off correctly on the left lead so we've been doing it on a rein change. What was actually AMAZING was that the one time she struck off wrong she maintained it (towards the field ofc, it was a struggle to get her to transition down). She literally doesn't care what lead she's on she's so well balanced. But was was extra amazing was that I could FEEL she was on the wrong lead without even checking. I've not often had the chance to feel if a lead was correct or not. I still can't tell the diagonal though. 

But she's not dumb y'know. MY lessons take the same pattern and it's really for my sake. This means that she knows that once I ask for a canter, that every trot will always transition into a canter thereafter. She waits for it. I don't even have to squeeze my legs guys. It's as simple as sit and go. *WHAT. A. LUXURY.* Eventually I'm going to have to shake things up but she seems happy with it and honestly, it really helps not having to nag a canter so I can focus on having a good position. It DOES mean that I'll have to work on it down the line but right now this is a good perk for me. 

Can I just add that when we were cantering/galloping around that Katie loved every second of it LOL? Her expression and eagerness to eat up those strides... She's cheeky and she can at times get strong definitely. She only gets strong at the gait you ask for though. So if it's a walk, she makes it a march. If it's a trot she tries to imitate a pacer pace and if it's a canter it's actually a gallop. It's great not having to nag for starters! I am usually laughing or grinning as I am reining her mischievous butt in - I can't even explain why. And she will listen to you even if it does take a bit of reminding. And if you really want to stop she will actually stop. So no stress right? She's a good, greenie girl that gets excited sometimes but is NEVER mean or pushy about it. But my instructor told me that when she gets strong, where I'm laughing and grinning at Katie's antics some other people get scared :<. She expressed some concern about tomorrow's lesson with the Wife, at 11am because of all of this. Wife has come very far and has done very well in her lessons on Katie so far but she's not ridden a fresh Katie, who still hasn't got it all out of her system. Must be all that amazing summer grass.... I wouldn't have even worried about it but the fact that she brought it up has planted a seed of anxiety.

Finally as the ride ended Katie halted and turned her head to nuzzle my hand as I was patting her. For a good minute she and I had a conversation about how fun the ride was haha and I even managed to give her another treat like this. I'm so focused on balance and she's so busy trying to get to look at the field that we don't really connect properly when riding - we're very disjointed. So it was REALLY nice to connect right after it, while still mounted. It was very much of a "hey, we did good today" post-workout affirmation haha. I was reminded by the instructor that while Katie is a SAFE horse, she is by no means an EASY horse to ride. It helps to know that because it is much harder across the board with a lot of things I took for granted in proper schoolies. The fact they can keep a straight line without needing feedback every step, for example. Learning a LOT, I tell you.

And as we walk, still mounted, out of the arena Katie HAS to stop by any person and say hello and demand a pat. Want to feel loved? Just be in the vicinity and she'll come over. I gave her back a good massage and check over for any discomfort - while she licks the door appreciatively - and lob her out to her herd so she can get back to being leader. <3


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## Kalraii

Acadianartist said:


> Glad to hear you feel good about your time with Katie! That's the important part. I know it's hard to remember it -- I just finished a lesson where I had a couple of horrible sideways canters on Kodak. It's like her steering just goes at the canter. Meantime, my daughter and Harley are jumping and cantering circles around us, lol. Oh well... the important thing is that we are out spending time with our horses!
> 
> But I do find that if I ride alone, we are both a lot more relaxed. We learn more during lessons though so... it's a balancing act.
> 
> Very happy to hear you having one on one time with Katie, and deciding to do things at your own pace.



It's really nice to be reminded that I don't HAVE to do anything I don't want to but I felt very pressured to push the riding side of things. Actually, once I sort of let it go I am finding it effortless to ring up and book that lesson. I cannot wait until I feel competent enough to school her alone. I forgot to ask - does your daughter ever ride Kodak as well? Since she sounds like such a natural!




mmshiro said:


> I so wish I could go out on a ride with you - you sound like my kind of riding buddy. It's those "Look what I survived today!" moments that I live for...  Because it's always something that "just happens" (usually wildlife or terrain related) and never anything I can really blame the horse for, I'm never discouraged from going out again.
> 
> I can sense the joy you are experiencing from here - there is no doubt that your horse can, too.



Thank you! I have enjoyed it a lot this week. Katie is very obviously having fun as well which pleases me even more. That branch is my first ever trail incident haha. Who knows what next? I am really waiting for a bolt tbh. I have a bet with myself that I'm going to be bolted with BEFORE I fall off, both which will happen eventually. I have to ask - what has been your "oh crap" moment out on the trail, since you do so much?


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## Acadianartist

Kalraii said:


> It's really nice to be reminded that I don't HAVE to do anything I don't want to but I felt very pressured to push the riding side of things. Actually, once I sort of let it go I am finding it effortless to ring up and book that lesson. I cannot wait until I feel competent enough to school her alone. I forgot to ask - does your daughter ever ride Kodak as well? Since she sounds like such a natural!


You know, the funny thing is that kids don't get all worried and anxious about it. Well, most kids anyway. My daughter has ridden Kodak and did well, but admitted that she is very hard to ride. But there is a young girl (15) who rides with the same coach as my daughter, and who has been riding Kodak. In fact, they had the most amazing ride tonight! I don't normally let people ride Kodak because she can spook, but this girl has the right temperament, and I've been watching her ride for years. I know she'd like a horse, but her parents are humming and hawing, so I said she could try riding Kodak if she'd like. Tonight, she cantered Kodak in circles (her steering kind of goes when I try to canter her), and popped her over a bunch of cavalettis! My daughter rode Harley with them, and had a great time (finally riding with someone her speed instead of old mum, lol). It wasn't a lesson, just the two girls having fun on the horses, but I couldn't believe how Kodak was well-behaved with this girl. She did even better than when my own instructor got on! And about 10 times better than me. But I'm ok with that because every good ride Kodak has is good for her. 

I wonder if sometimes, as adults, we over-analyze and worry too much. We build things up in our heads, and want to do do things perfectly. The fear of making a mistake might be getting in the way of learning sometimes... and plain old having fun!


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> I have to ask - what has been your "oh crap" *moment* out on the trail, since you do so much?


I like how you use the singular...

- Horse clips top of jump into a field and stumbles on the landing. I go down on the neck, but horse recovers before I do and gallops across the field following the preceding horse, with me hugging the neck. I have to decide whether to ride it out or get myself upright. I opt for the latter, feeling her rhythm I use a quiet moment to push myself vertical. Oh yah, and no stirrups.

- Winter. I let her gallop across the field, following snow mobile tracks. I let her gallop on the downhill where she doubles her speed and I'm having a serious pucker moment, regretting this latest of my life choices. (We are talking 10 year-old fit ex-race horse here, BTW.)

- Galloping the edge of a field. It goes "flat, uphill, downhill, end of field". To the right is home, to the left is up a ravine. I did not manage to slow her down enough by the end of the uphill, so it becomes clear I won't stop her before the end of the field without endangering us. I prepare myself for a hard left at the end of the field (to take advantage of the ravine), and I caught her just in time before she could make a hard right through the tree line into the road.

- Green horse. We get a little lost in underbrush, and he walks faster than I can figure out the path. His chest gets caught in a vine (wooden), he rears, we fall. We brush ourselves off, I lead him out to the open from the ground, remount, and go home.

- Dodging differently colored spots on the ground (different color grass, a fleck of mulch or dirt, etc.) at full speed. Caused one fall, then I was prepared. Bolting from a bale of hay. Turn-and-bolt for no reason. A spook-a-minute when wind blows heavy, gobs of wet snow off the trees.

- Horse slide-stopping at a log, and before I can turn her around and go at it again, changing her mind and bunny-hopping over it from a standstill.

- Horse being surprised by something coming around a blind corner, performing unplanned, yet rapid, canter-to-halt transition.

- Canter in field. Horse trips into hole, I slam my "pubic symphysis" into the pommel. Three weeks no riding, half a year no yoga. 

And my favorite: Horse gets too close to a fence post jumping over a small log, I hit my knee and lose balance, am unable to recover this time, and hit the ground from a gallop. Split helmet, mild concussion, sprained ankle. Swap out helmet, tape up ankle, go up the same hill once more, finish the hour-and-a-half ride. Of all the above, this was the only event resulting in a separation from the horse.


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## Kalraii

I really am terrible at looking for updates - I follow the sidebar to much and forget how often it gets shuffled with new posts! 
@Acadianartist bang on the money. I see adults like this to - no care in the world. And here I am over-stressing the mounting issue and feeling not good enough to ride when I should just RIDE and enjoy it. Bah. Adulting. It must be so nice to see the kids just go for it and nice for the horse to feel that this little person isn't worried about a thing and the world is safe. 
@mmshiro thanks for the laughs haha you have had a LOT. I aspire to have your courage hacking out - I am pretty good but would be lying if at times I wasn't lying about my worry  I am very eager to rent a trailer and take her somewhere but I have no one to go with. So that first MEGA hack would be on my own... I am really unsure how I go about it. But the way she is with me I imagine because it WOULD be just us two... she'd look to me more than she does while being local and in smelling distance of her herd. 



*And an update.....*

So I didn't ride this week as car broke down. But I got to spend some lovely time with her. She was acting weird... very chatty, I've never heard her neigh so much. Bit funny picking up back feet... O.K. And then when I was hosing her down she actually tried to kick/swat me. Giving her the benefit of the doubt and knowing she's not had her feet touched for at least a week (I can't guarantee while she's out in the fields 24/7 that staff DO it though they are meant to) I rubbed her all over to see if she had any indication of pain. She was sensitive to her flanks, bum and back legs in general. Then it went DING. Turns out all the mares in her herd are currently in season - some of them grossly so lol. She was VERY fidgety.. just generally not herself. I used pressure and release to get her to stand and let me touch her legs. But she tried to kick me again, this time she raised her foot with her head and ear cocked at me, not as I would describe with an enraged or worried expression. More like a "grrr don't touch me there, I dare you". I didn't want to move away and reinforce that so I bluffed (by literally leaning closer, nothing more) and when she struck out I gave her a very _hard_ spank with a loud "NO!". She jumped on the spot and then was shocked enough to stand still and stare at me wide eyed. I guess it was the right thing to do in the moment though in retrospect I could have gone about it better, earlier. I've not had to correct her so firmly before but I really don't want her to ever think it's ok to threaten with a hoof, season or no season. After that I was able to pick up all her feet, rub her as I please and ofc gave her lots of treats for being good. When she realised everything is OK between us she went back to her happy, if fidgety, self.

And.. the reason I had to hose her in the first place is my fault. Because I took her to the indoor school for a roll but I didn't notice that they had wet it/sprayed it down with water. So yeah... my lovely grey horse turned into a piebald, pictures to follow. She loved it though and was bucking and farting around like a nutter between rolls. We played some tag and "BOO!", chase the ball and draw. When I got back after her hosing she HELPED ME put her shavings down. I literally took off the wrapping and Katie kicked it around the stall for me, had a roll to spread it around.... was easy as pie just sweeping it up to be neat LOL. 

She was steaming though so we did some hand grazing/drying off while we hung out with the cool family of the Cob Herd. I've agreed to let one of the staff members to use Katie for Sunday's on-premises gymkhana games. I like this staff member, she's very empathetic and a very good, gentle rider. Turns out she's selling her horse and would love to share Katie but ofc I can't... as I already have one now >.< I will be there to watch the games and make sure she's looked after! Once we got back to her stall we did some treat training, no clicker. Y'know... she does seem a slow learning in the saddle but I believe that's anxiety/being a little shut down still, though improving. But on the ground she's a quick study, even if she did know the tricks before. I got her to bow and and give a leg both sides. By the end of the session I could say "leg" while pointing to it and she would raise it for me. I was actually amazed. Part of it is maybe her just guessing and it's a 1 in 3 chance of being correct but the fact she was trying and engaged was good enough! She's earned the reputation for being a bit of a doofus but I actually think she's got a smart little brain ticking inside there and needs some nurturing to get it out. 

My sharer came at 7.30pm just as I was leaving. The yard closes at 9pm. I did mention that to her but as I got home, nearly 10pm, I got a call saying that she was still on the premises by a very angry instructor. My sharer, my problem. I rang her and she was apologetic but had wrongly assumed it wouldn't be a big deal, despite me saying so before. But I noticed that her tone was pretty down... she said that Katie was a hard ride tonight and was VERY excitable, hard to focus and keep slow. Had an extra spring in her step for the jumps, though. I'd given a heads up that she was pretty fresh recently and about being in season (as confirmed by some other knowledgeables). I passed it onto the instructor as Katie has a lesson tomorrow so she'll feedback after that. I feel a bit bad for her then being rushed but.. rules are rules man. This was in addition to not previously putting a course of jumps away and leaving it for the same instructor to clear up the following day, speaks volumes. I'm listening, is all I gotta say. 

Lastly it appears the Herd Wars have begun in earnest. Katie does have a mark where she's clearly been kicked, no swelling or pain or stiffness indicators. Doesn't look recent and some other people checked it too. A small cut on the inside left rear... I mean, very small. Is this where I learn about how horses like to injure themselves in strange and wonderful ways? The fact she got kicked makes me worried for the dinky little ponies and yearlings in with her. If SHE kicked THEM it would be more than just a mark.... 

So a bit of a 50-50 day for me. Pictures next!


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## Kalraii

Pictures! XD


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> @mmshiro thanks for the laughs haha you have had a LOT. I aspire to have your courage hacking out - I am pretty good but would be lying if at times I wasn't lying about my worry


Courage is what you do despite being worried, and I'm anxious every.single.time. I'm about go out. That is why I'm dawdling when I brush and tack up. It makes me believe that if I set a calm tone from the beginning, I'll have a calmer horse. I also walk a lot during the warm-up phase, probably more than other people. At some point, I take heart and have a little trot, which warms up my muscles and, especially on rough terrain, gives me confidence that my balance is still adequate. The first canter is usually a 2 sec sprint up a little incline. AFTER that, I'm usually ready for the crazier stuff I do. I could not jump on a horse and gallop out of town, like in the movies. 

My biggest asset in hacking out are my hip adductor muscles I developed over the course of the last two years. They, and a fitting saddle with nice knee pads, have kept me aboard through some rather unpredictable moves, and many of these did not cause me to yank the reins (survival reflex), so I'm particularly proud of that. I've also had horses that are feisty, but overall do not object to going out with me. I tend to make sure they have as much fun as possible, with safety the first consideration. Some of the stuff you see people do to their horses in the arena would get you walking home - at best - when you are supposed to be a team and watching out for each other "out there".

Some people ride with pretty breeches, I ride with a satellite emergency beacon...


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## knightrider

I love the invitation to describe "oh crap" moments. I've had hundreds (thousands?), but the funniest was when I was on my young green colt ponying my six year old daughter on her experienced quiet pony. We were almost back to the barn when a huge branch collapsed and fell right in front of the two horses. My horse spooked wildly left and the pony spooked wildly right. Oh crap! Do I come off my horse and keep holding on to my daughter's horse? Or let go of my daughter and stay with my green guy? I opted to keep my daughter safe and came flying off my horse like a missile. Luckily no one was hurt and my green colt waited while we sorted it all out.

Another funny "oh crap" moment was when I let a friend ride my home-raised appaloosa which I had trained from a yearling, on a trail ride in the woods . . . in Pennsylvania, 250 miles from home. My friend saw a branch at just the right height and thought it would be fun to do a cowboy movie move. He grabbed the branch, swung off my heart horse, and swung up on the branch . . . as we watched the light of my life gallop off into the sunset. OH! CRAP! There goes my horse, heading 250 miles home! But again, luckily, after a bit, we were able to find her in the trees and get her safely remounted.


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## Acadianartist

@*Kalraii* omg the mud! good times. 

@*mmshiro* I have new respect for you. Honestly, in reading all your posts, I just figured you were one of those brave souls who just had no fear. The fact that you admit to being anxious, and work through it each and every time earns you top marks with me.

@*knightrider* , that's hilarious. The second one anyway. The first would have terrified me, since I can SO relate as a mom.

I have had too many "oh crap" moments to count, but the latest one was during our recent lesson on Wednesday. Not even on a trail. Just in the ring, doing a lesson, all is well, until BICYCLES roll by our road. Not just one or two either. A whole freaking pack of them. At least 30 altogether, with about 15 of them in the front, and laggers following behind every few seconds, for a total of about 5 minutes of SHEER TERROR. Ok, not really. Kodak did spook a couple of times, but I hung on. And honestly, her spooks were half-hearted. She wasn't even trying, really. Meh. Every once in a while another would whiz by and she would act like she was going to spook, but I would turn her head, get her attention, and we were back to trotting. 

I guess I'm getting better at it, and Kodak is getting less unpredictable (wait, is being unpredictable becoming predictable?). In any case, I was happy.


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## Kalraii

knightrider said:


> I love the invitation to describe "oh crap" moments. I've had hundreds (thousands?), but the funniest was when I was on my young green colt ponying my six year old daughter on her experienced quiet pony. We were almost back to the barn when a huge branch collapsed and fell right in front of the two horses. My horse spooked wildly left and the pony spooked wildly right. Oh crap! Do I come off my horse and keep holding on to my daughter's horse? Or let go of my daughter and stay with my green guy? I opted to keep my daughter safe and came flying off my horse like a missile. Luckily no one was hurt and my green colt waited while we sorted it all out.
> 
> Another funny "oh crap" moment was when I let a friend ride my home-raised appaloosa which I had trained from a yearling, on a trail ride in the woods . . . in Pennsylvania, 250 miles from home. My friend saw a branch at just the right height and thought it would be fun to do a cowboy movie move. He grabbed the branch, swung off my heart horse, and swung up on the branch . . . as we watched the light of my life gallop off into the sunset. OH! CRAP! There goes my horse, heading 250 miles home! But again, luckily, after a bit, we were able to find her in the trees and get her safely remounted.



Oh my god. Haha... that was nearly me and the branch! I can't imagine how that must have felt o.o I'm just waiting for the day... Share more if you wish so I can mentally prepare haha!



Acadianartist said:


> @*
> 
> I have had too many "oh crap" moments to count, but the latest one was during our recent lesson on Wednesday. Not even on a trail. Just in the ring, doing a lesson, all is well, until BICYCLES roll by our road. Not just one or two either. A whole freaking pack of them. At least 30 altogether, with about 15 of them in the front, and laggers following behind every few seconds, for a total of about 5 minutes of SHEER TERROR. Ok, not really. Kodak did spook a couple of times, but I hung on. And honestly, her spooks were half-hearted. She wasn't even trying, really. Meh. Every once in a while another would whiz by and she would act like she was going to spook, but I would turn her head, get her attention, and we were back to trotting.
> 
> I guess I'm getting better at it, and Kodak is getting less unpredictable (wait, is being unpredictable becoming predictable?). In any case, I was happy.*


*


When you say she's in terror does she bolt? Duck?  You must have developed a pretty good seat. Katie is so well behaved that I'm gonna be SO unprepared when the time comes! Kodak sounds too smart 



mmshiro said:



Courage is what you do despite being worried, and I'm anxious every.single.time. I'm about go out. That is why I'm dawdling when I brush and tack up. It makes me believe that if I set a calm tone from the beginning, I'll have a calmer horse. I also walk a lot during the warm-up phase, probably more than other people. At some point, I take heart and have a little trot, which warms up my muscles and, especially on rough terrain, gives me confidence that my balance is still adequate. The first canter is usually a 2 sec sprint up a little incline. AFTER that, I'm usually ready for the crazier stuff I do. I could not jump on a horse and gallop out of town, like in the movies. 

My biggest asset in hacking out are my hip adductor muscles I developed over the course of the last two years. They, and a fitting saddle with nice knee pads, have kept me aboard through some rather unpredictable moves, and many of these did not cause me to yank the reins (survival reflex), so I'm particularly proud of that. I've also had horses that are feisty, but overall do not object to going out with me. I tend to make sure they have as much fun as possible, with safety the first consideration. Some of the stuff you see people do to their horses in the arena would get you walking home - at best - when you are supposed to be a team and watching out for each other "out there".

Some people ride with pretty breeches, I ride with a satellite emergency beacon... 

Click to expand...

I agree with @Acadianartist it's good to hear another that dawdles and takes some time to warm up. It's all too easy to perceive everyone around as super brave when actually... they are anxious inside too.*


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## Kalraii

UPDATE:

So last weekend was the gymkhana. It was baking and I got sunburned. The wife and her husband came along. It really was a LOT of fun though I didn't ride. 1. because I am not comfortable 2. I don't jump well and 3. Katie had two riding lessons in the morning so to do the whole thing would have been too much in this heat.

BUT.... one of the ladies there couldn't ride her share, a boisterous stallion, in the jumping course as he'd come down with the sniffles. The vet was around this day doing her rounds. Yes, on a Sunday . One of the horses has a bad leg ulcer apparently and she has to come regularly to re-bandage it. This lady is lovely I've met her a few times before and she recently retired her boy to the quiet life, hence the share. Some conversation later I agreed to let her take Katie around the course - once only - as my own sharer has been doing some gymnastics with her. Katie came out of her second lesson COVERED in sweat. I mean dripping. It was truly a baking day. Gave her a half hour break with a sip to drink and a bit of apple. Lady and Katie spent 5mins in the other arena getting acquainted. This lady rides REALLY REALLY well made things I find awkward look effortless. When it was her turn they put the jumps up to 70 as she'd not respect any bread sticks shorter than that. I really would love to link the video but she wasn't keen but I have got a picture with her face marked out. Katie knocked only one of the first jumps down but really gave it her all. It was incredibly sweet the way she evaluated each jump haha. On the last one her stride was too long and she had add a quick foot in last second. Another jump earlier required a handbrake turn which is not Katie's strong point haha but she really looked after the Lady and was determined to make the jump! So sweet, no ducking or even hinting at refusal. Lady hacked her down the shady path for a cool down and when she got back thanked me profusely for letting me ride her. I mean hang on... thanks to HER for showing me what Katie and hopefully I can do together in the future. I was so happy! 

Wife and husband helped give Katie a bath - unbelievably. Husband got to see so many spooks, bolts, bucks, rears and falls. No one got hurt and everyone had fun. Katie was honestly such a happy horse. Tired... but after her bath was incredibly chilled. After an hour nap I brought her out to hang out with the crowd. She was nuzzling people's hair and saying hello to anyone in range. The funniest part was when the races began she had two eyes on it but her ears and body said relaxation. The husband actually got involved for the first time EVER! He'd untacked her, helped bathe her... led her. Helped put her fly mask on. I really think seeing so many people not stress about little things helped his confidence so much. He even socialised with other horses. I've NEVER EVER seen him so up close and personal with so many horses in one day. To him his fall was the end of the world and for the first time he saw that it's just a part of riding... It was the first time he's looked comfortable in the year + I've seen him around horses.

---------------------------------------------

*The wife is looking to share!*

.... but not Katie. The yard is too far for her and honestly I'm not fazed. But you can smell it on her, the desperation to get MORE involved with horses. She is looking to share twice a week so we have been searching for her. It's really hard to find people that accept fairly novice riders. But I think we've got two and I'll link them below. We're going to see them Saturday. 

I'm going to make a new thread to ask for opinions!


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## Kalraii

Annnddd... Look at that wee face! And the leggies!


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## mkmurphy81

Acadian just reminded me of one of my favorite "Oh crap!" moments. 

Bicycles!!

Long ago, when I was a stupid teenager, I rode bareback a lot. There was nothing I would do with a saddle that I wouldn't do without. That included trails. We only had one good trail in the woods, so we often rode through neighborhoods and along the levee. This day, my friends and I decided to head down the levee behind a nice neighborhood. I was the only one bareback; my friends actually had some sense. On the way back towards the barn, I discovered that my usually bombproof horse was afraid of bicycles while one was headed straight for us. She spooked _down_ the levee. Miraculously, I stayed on and managed to stop her. Unfortunately, I was now at the bottom of a very steep hill and in the backyard of a very nice house. The only way out was _up_. I abandoned the reins and took two large handfuls of mane along with a death grip with my legs. Somehow we made the climb back to the top. My friends found the whole scene hysterical, and, looking back, I have to agree.


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## Acadianartist

mkmurphy81 said:


> Bicycles!!
> 
> Long ago, when I was a stupid teenager, I rode bareback a lot. There was nothing I would do with a saddle that I wouldn't do without. That included trails. We only had one good trail in the woods, so we often rode through neighborhoods and along the levee. This day, my friends and I decided to head down the levee behind a nice neighborhood. I was the only one bareback; my friends actually had some sense. On the way back towards the barn, I discovered that my usually bombproof horse was afraid of bicycles while one was headed straight for us. She spooked _down_ the levee. Miraculously, I stayed on and managed to stop her. Unfortunately, I was now at the bottom of a very steep hill and in the backyard of a very nice house. The only way out was _up_. I abandoned the reins and took two large handfuls of mane along with a death grip with my legs. Somehow we made the climb back to the top. My friends found the whole scene hysterical, and, looking back, I have to agree.


Hahaha... yes, I was a little more gutsy as a teen too. I regularly let my horse (who had raced in his previous life) gallop as fast as he could go in a field by our house - bareback!!! But your story reminded me of the time he dove down a steep embankment because we met a truck on the road and he was terrified of traffic (yet my parents let me ride him on the road). He went nose first into that embankment, lost a shoe in the process, but I somehow stayed on. I was using a saddle though, lol. 

To answer your question Kalraii, when Kodak spooks she can do a number of things. Often it's a sideways move, so more of a shying with her head twisted towards the offending object. But she also drops down sharply, leaving you momentarily suspended in mid-air if you're not paying attention. And you better hope she doesn't do the drop and spin, which requires some agility. The spin and bolt is the worst though, because you're on a galloping horse, and are off-balance. Many of her spooks are just a kind of sideways/forward/backward jump. Those aren't too bad. 

Another move that throws me off, but is not related to spooking, is dropping her head to snort loudly. Sometimes she does it when she relaxes, but sometimes it seems like a kind of protest. You'll be riding along in two-point or posting, or trying to canter, and she'll put her head way down between her front legs so you feel like you're going to go over her neck. It's a little unnerving but I've learned to expect it from her now, and not give her too much rein when she does it. 

On another note, I watched my daughter's friend ride Kodak last night, and felt much like you did watching the other lady ride Katie. I was in awe. This girl is 15, has been riding for several years with my daughter's coach, and just looks awesome on Kodak - and vice versa. I almost feel like I should be paying her to put good rides on Kodak, but she's thrilled she gets to ride here free. So win-win! 

They were cantering so nicely last night, and I'm pleased as can be. We talked about it afterwards, and she feels it's no big deal (she's been riding the coach's horse who is also very fast, so she's used to slowing a horse down), but I asked her to give me some tips. They're even jumping! Honestly, this pair looks so gorgeous together, it makes my heart melt. I can't say I'm not a little envious, but at the same time, it shows me that if I keep working at it, I can get Kodak working better for me too. Oh, she still spooks with this young girl though... that's not likely to go away, but the spooks do seem more manageable. No bicycles last night, but there was at least one ghost. 

Anyway, it's humbling, but also incredibly encouraging to watch someone riding your horse so well. We just have to believe that we can get there in time too.


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## Kalraii

Acadianartist said:


> Another move that throws me off, but is not related to spooking, is dropping her head to snort loudly. Sometimes she does it when she relaxes, but sometimes it seems like a kind of protest. You'll be riding along in two-point or posting, or trying to canter, and she'll put her head way down between her front legs so you feel like you're going to go over her neck. It's a little unnerving but I've learned to expect it from her now, and not give her too much rein when she does it.


Katie was the exact same in the beginning but I USED to ride with too light a grip before her so mid canter my reins were just snatched from me entirely haha! I remember looking at my instructor in wide eyed disbelief, still cantering, and then picking them up and shouting "recovery!". After that I closed my fingers fully but she wasn't expecting that and the first few times nearly pulled me off her haha. Fortunately that's past us now though I keep failing to remind myself to buy some gloves...

-------------------------

UPDATE: 

I spent the evening with Katie but just bonding. She had a lesson later but I got there a few hours before to hang out. Instructor told me that last week's lessons were not good at all. Katie had all but lost her mind and was even worse than when she first arrived, spooking, bolting and threatening to jump out the arena. Instructor had a suspicion that Katie did not like her new stall - or mainly - being out of sight with no company. All the other horses in her area are turned out so when she is stabled before a lesson or even in-between she has no company but can still hear all the commotion around. My instructor snuck around to monitor her and found that Katie was very stressed, not eating, not playing with her treat ball and was beginning to weave. Broke my heart to hear that but good news is that they have moved her stall to the front of the yard where she is better settled. Since being on full turnout I suspect she's even more herd-bound now and doesn't like her stall...

... But I am not entirely deaf. I am aware this could be the first hint of her being sour as well. I spent several hours chilling with her - she was very relaxed. I saddled her myself for her lesson and we hung out by the mounting block munching some grass. When the lady arrived and got on, Katie became instantly wound up. So I guess she has a lot of anxiety simmering underneath that stoic demeanour of hers. 

Also afterwards I was suddenly panicking about her saddle fit. I will link a picture below and anyone that reads this can tell me their thoughts. I'm gonna get a different saddle fitter this time as the last one was too busy trying to bung me the most expensive deal and worst fit. I have NEVER seen this type of rub on her in the half year I've had her now. She sweats a LOT and it's been hot and *NOTE: the last saddle cloth was bright red and brand new.* Shape wise she hasn't changed drastically, just moved some muscle around. I do supply SEVERAL saddlecloths and have been cleaning them every fortnight (since I have surplus, no rush). But I notice that the riding school don't change her cloth - I do. So she maybe went a few rides in a mank cloth that didn't absorb any fresh sweat for being dirty... so the rub in such a sweaty zone is maybe from overheating and lack of absorbency? Maybe her saddle is making her so uncomfortable? It's a heavy saddle but again I've never see this sort of marking on her. But she never reacted to me pressing anywhere around her back or spine... and she was very sweet natured while I was saddling her, she was actually grooming me. 

Panic aside.... we actually did some leading around off-rope. We worked on the command to "come" and continued our training from last week to learn the bow and to pick up each front leg from a verbal cue and point gesture. She actually REALLY enjoys this stuff. I'm not following a liberty program or anything as I dont feel I have the time enough to be consistent. Just dabbling in bits and bobs. I've learned that she actually has a "thinking" face. So when I ask for something I get to the point I ask ONCE and go silent while I wait... sometimes it takes 10 seconds for her to process the request but she usually got it right. I actually found that picking her legs up was really great today and she was very gentle with it.

And lastly... the turn out. She's such an angel. No pulling or anything. She is chill while I put on her fly mask AT the gate and walks into the field nice and calmly. I wanted to see if she would play with me so I made some sounds, clapped and began to race away calling her and laughing. She did some fancy moves as if to say "nope, not running. Nope... nope.. oh, OKKKK just this once!" and then she lit her engines and came galloping AT me at full speed. I mean it felt like it was AT me but as she got closer she veered a respectable distance around me. I pretended to chase/pounce her (again, from a far distance) and she was bucking and squealing playfully. 

Then we both looked up to see the whole herd RUNNING AT US. I'm talking around 15 horses all galloping at me and Katie standing out in the open... I said some expletives. Katie instantly began to chase them off. I like to think that she was protecting me but she was just asserting herself LOL. I still got mugged though. I felt like the Queen being dragged through an audience. I said hi to one horse, she got a hoof then I said hi to that horse... who got bitten by the other.... who I said hi to. But all of them were very respectful of me actually. I was very careful to keep my distance and it wasn't a great situation to be in. I was nonetheless impressed with their awareness of me EXCEPT FOR ONE MARE. This mare is only a little smaller than Katie. Now I can't really say if it was playing but I'm gona for safety's sake and coz she's a stranger say NO it wasn't playing. But she outright came up to me and challenged me, tried to herd me off. It felt like she was just confused about how this human-horse relationship works but still... I shoo'd her and she walked a distance away. After about a minute watching them graze I turned around to leave for the gate. I heard thundering behind me and turn to see this huge mare run at me, both eyes ON me. I didn't trust her to stop like Katie would. I make myself big and scream "don't you _dare_!" It echoed across the hills and I could see the regret on her face. A second later I began to threaten to get after her and the whole herd, including Katie, legged it LOL. 

And then I saved a bumblebee from a web (no spider). Too slow arachnid, this bee's got pollen to spread.


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## Fimargue

Kalraii said:


> And then I saved a bumblebee from a web (no spider). Too slow arachnid, this bee's got pollen to spread.


Ah, bless your cotton socks. I adore bumblebees. I just saw a snake on the road eating a mouse when out riding about a week ago, and it was killing me...

Have you thought about different sort of saddle pads, that absorb sweat better?


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## Kalraii

I am not a happy bunny. The saddlecloth was bright red but still... have NEVER see this before. Is a powder i can use to test sweat spots for grey horse? Im gonna be down there tomorrow to reassess things! No lessons fortunately!


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## Fimargue

I think we can both agree that doesn't look too good... She doesn't sweat at all underneath the pad??


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## Kalraii

@Fimargue on phone so typing sucks. Yes she soaks the entire pad and everywhere else.. im talking in this heat shes wet everywhere after a workout. this is after i sponged and shed dried off but these spots remained... i want her cloths changed every lesson because of the absorbency factor but have already begun to look at other stuff now. 😞


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## Fimargue

@Kalraii, ok. Really difficult to say, but you should try tomorrow if she is sore in that area, by massaging with your thumbs. The most important thing would be to look that there is spinal clearance after the exercise, and there at least is not promising that the coloured area goes over the spine. Then again don't know if the colour leaked, but shouldn't it be elsewhere as well? 

You should have a look at Decathlon, they make quality pads for a good price. I love mine.


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## Kalraii

I will have a look at those @Fimargue thanks. you make a good point about it not spreading everywhere in which case implies there is too much pressure there... she was a lot more "wasted" around the area you can see when I got her. It's gotten better with work and some lunging. I wish I could ride her bareback but neither of us are quite ready for that. 

annnnnnnnnnnnnd to top it off I got a text this morning saying she's been kicked in her left hind and there is a gash. Fortunately the vet was already there and took care of it. She's apparently sound but is off today (obviously) and will be re-evaluated tomorrow. Has to stay in until the wound closes. SMH.♠


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## Fimargue

Oh, jeez. How was the back today? The pain and misery of anything to do with saddle fit...

https://www.decathlon.co.uk/540-saddle-cloth-turquoise-id_8487848.html - This is pretty much what I have, though older models, but shape and lining are the same. I find that the honeycomb lining is just the best.


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## Kalraii

Thanks! Aw even linked a UK site <3 I did manage to find them in the end and have ordered one to begin with. Her back seemed fine but I was actually more concerned about her leg. By the end of the day the vet did another soundness exam and gave her the all clear. No indication of even stiffness. What a tank. But apparently yesterday morning was like accident and emergency at hospital - half the mares came in with gashes. The sweet sweet two year old, tiny iddy biddy pony got kicked in her chest, clipping her shoulder right down to the bone. Yesterday I did see the mare that challenged me harass this little pony, who was being defended by another. So this pony, the mare defending her and Katie and some others got into a war overnight I think. This pony is honestly such a sweetie, she has all the perks of a foal/yearling without any of the mouthiness or testiness. She's for sale and it breaks my heart knowing that for being a pony she's likely to be passed around a lot :'<

About her saddle I'm arranging for saddler to come and instructor advised that we can now probably remove the half-pad that was likely making things tighter now that she's filled out more around her withers, which was where she had the most wastage... but Katie still shows no bother around the area.

So last night I spend the evening doing the same bonding exercises. Grooming, bow, leg... "come". She's getting really good at her recall, a bit like a dog now. I put no pressure on the rope call her name and ask for her to come nicely, second time firmly third time with a "HEY IM HERE!". She has begun to recall on the first ask, even while distracted eating grass. The only thing she's now doing is trying to bow and lifts her leg up (properly, so her hoof is touching her belly) and holds it there hoping for a treat LOL. So I've actively been ignoring her but she hasn't realised yet that she only gets a treat when I ask and not just coz she does XYZ. But it's so cute the way she holds her leg up AND bows her head between her legs and waits... 

Turned her out and she usually always wants to have a drink immediately (yeah she doesn't like the impeccably clean water I provide). But two girls were guarding the trough and she was a little worried. It was hilarious she just stood next to me waiting.... so I herded the other girls away and led her by her face mask to the trough and as she was drinking I "guarded" her as one mare was thinking about trying to shoo us. Then she escaped by bucking and farting her way down the hill lol.


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## knightrider

I used to do a lot of horse tricks and what I learned is the command, "That will do." It doesn't take the horse long to understand that trick and treat time is over and to stop doing whatever the trick is that they hope will earn them a treat.


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## tinyliny

I thought the command was , "That'll do, Pig".


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## Kalraii

@knightrider I've actually been using a single "_enough!_" and then literally ignoring her begging attempts. It's working gradually, at least she's giving up faster before she nearly takes out another kneecap lol.

@tinyliny isn't that from Babe? 

*UPDATE:*

Still sound.. the gash has healed fast. Like really.. horses heal _this_ fast?

So I'm putting no pressure on myself to ride. In fact, I have a new experiment. I'm just gonna focus on groundwork for the next fortnight and am curious to see how she will react to my riding her after a "session". Today we did groundwork. What is the definition of groundwork? Lol. I mean... I'm teaching her lateral flexion with the aim of having a one-rein stop for y'know when I decide to be mental and take her bit away (who am I kidding, she doesn't even listen to the snaffle anyway AMIRITE?! Lies... she's much better now). 

I gave her two days off. When I came back today she instantly remembered what point+"leg" means on both sides, accurately and lifted each leg really high, very cute. She also remembered what "Bow" but she's not so good just off the word alone yet. With the lateral flexion she is VERY good on the right (as expected) and godawful on the left. However, when a treat was there she was the vision of flexibility in getting it... so either she pushes through it or is physically/mentally uncomfortable otherwise. I'm planning on following up with a CT of her head and neck anyway due to the bone deformity above her right eye just to get the all clear (and pray for nothing else). 

She is also pretty scared of having her head near a human head, specifically. So we worked on a "Kiss" command and within about 10minutes she was taking a treat from my lips. So yeah.. obviously REALLY scared...  And then I found out she either has really ticklish ears inside or she's been twitched OR she just hates having her earholes invaded. Either way she actually threatened to bite me, ear pinning and all. And no, I did NOT just jam my thumb in. I was just stroking the inside of her ear very slowly and firmly, not to tickle. But I mean she HATED it... and 10 minutes later I was able to grab her ears and rub them inside no problem. So yeah.. she really hated it... obviously  So either she's trusting me really fast or she's just pretending -.- 

And remember when I said a fortnight ago she was being funny about her back end and we attributed it to being in season? Picking her feet was stressful as even a light "get off me" was nearly enough for detachment. Well today she was the most gentle, soft and slowest leg-picker-upper ever! It's strange to describe picking feet out as a tender moment...

I cannot lunge Katie. It is fact. Unless I get after her like a banshee she might as well give me two fingers for my effect on her. Since lunging is boring and I think frankly, she's too big to make it a habit, it wasn't a priority to get this not-a-problem fixed (note: instructor makes it look easy). However, when trying to teach her to back up, with a little jiggle of the rope, she bounced into a circle full of energy, Ah poop. And it happened repeatedly. So turns out I CAN lunge Katie ****. So I need a new way to encourage her to back up as I'd like to keep this little tool available and to break her out of it I'd have to escalate excessively, I feel. I obviously have a hand gesture and verbal cue for "BACK" but I need to give her incentive to move back in the first place with no contact, no jiggling allowed. Maybe waving a long whip with a follow up tapping if absolutely necessary?

Dunno. But this is fun stuff! She REALLY associates "GOOD" and "GOOD GIRL!" with praise so maybe this new connection will help under saddle? IDK!


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## Acadianartist

Sounds like things are progressing so nicely! Glad to hear the injury healed so fast. Those can be so scary. 

Katie is a fast learner, like Kodak. And yeah, Kodak would not let me near her face, but now I can touch her anywhere, including in the ears. She's actually discovered that human fingers are great scratching tools, and comes in for ear scratches now. So it's hard to say whether they just come to trust us more, or decide there's something in it for them. 

Also, I have absolutely found that the "Good girl" translates to riding. Whenever things are going well when I'm riding her, a "good girl" gets Kodak's ears flicking backwards, and she's pleased at herself and get her attention back to me. At first though, she would stop and think there was a treat coming, so now I do a lot of training without treats. My groundwork is all done without treats, but at the very end of a session, I give her a few so she's learned that they'll come eventually, but doesn't expect them right away.

Clearly, the two of you are really becoming bffs! So wonderful! And I hope you get the saddle fitting worked out. It is such a PITA.


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## Kalraii

I am missing stuff left right and centre. Her saddle has been re-flocked to fit. He even shaped the flocking in such a way due the muscle wastage she has around her wither area. She is going to continue to be long-lined a few times each week up and down the local hill to help build that up. He also did it so she will continue to wear a supportive half-pad until that area is built up. When I rode her it had really great clearance and she seemed comfortable. Apparently the yard manager tried to ride Katie bareback up the field turning turnout. Turns out Katie did NOT appreciate that, refused to move and gave mini warning bucks, so her feet barely left the ground. YM took the warning and got off lol. It's good to know for myself though . I'd be trying with bridle and bareback pad first though. Maybe Katie thought "this is chill time wth you doing up there?! get _off_!" I think it's also really cool to know that she will give us humans a reasonable chance to read her warnings before exploding haha 

I didn't get to ride for a few weeks been busy and too hot tbh. In the 30's celcius now. I've had some wonderful few days with her and have found that we have properly clicked now. I could always tell that she wanted to be with her herd even though she always behaved wonderfully with me. These last few days she was really HERE with me. I've been walking her like a dog down the trail and she's better to lead than some people's actual dogs lol... I really don't mind her grabbing leaves during our walk since it's meant to be a chill sniff around. It's a narrow trail so I'll actually let the lead rope slid through my hands as I don't want her to learn to resist me when I do ask. And the best part is when I do resist with a light touch she'll pay attention to it and listen to me. Her subsequent "asks" are very gentle too - it's not as if she's snatching her head full force or dragging you like some horses do. She gets to ask but understands I wont always give. I do think this kind of freedom won't suit every horse but she and I have a good balance of give and take while being respectful of each other. Each "freedom" has it's place. In fact, when I ask her to lead and be with me she'll walk at my right shoulder, behind, on a loose rope, sometimes nuzzling me. I can even put an arm under her head and hug it to me while we're still walking. She absolutely loves meeting people and dogs on the trail. She REALLY likes dogs I have to be careful she doesn't stick her face in strangers in case she gets bitten. 

My work with her feet has paid off. I don't even need to touch her to pick her feet up. She gently lifts it and holds it up until I have a good grip. I can do it with all 4. She's a bit more unbalanced with her hinds so I let her rest a little weight on my leg when it needs a solid cleaning. She let me clean around her lady bits and teats today very comfortably. She also finally got the idea that to get rid of the hose water on her head she just has to drop it. Oh... and that it's not so bad. In fact, it's quite refreshing! I had a good rummage in her ear holes and nostrils too. She must think I'm crazy haha! 

We also had a riding lesson for the first time in several weeks. It was an early one to avoid the heat as much as possible. So because my stress of mounting comes from having a foot in the stirrup and being dragged off... this time I just didn't use the stirrup. I stood on my tippy toes and swung a leg over. She is an inch too tall for it to be a perfect mounting but it was good enough and she stood STATUE STILL while I adjusted everything. I have never felt more relaxed in my life. Even when I bumped her trying to find my foot holes she didn't fuss. I praised her like you said @Acadianartist and she was so cute the way she looked back at me to acknowledge it. I continued to praise her when she did good at it really helped keep us both relaxed actually. I love it when I say "good girl" and she lowers her head and let's out a huge snort. I think if we can keep this up I could get the courage to mount up confidently with no one on standby and 999 pre-dialed. I will still make sure we occasionally have to do some semi-ground mounts (I will never be able to ground mount her with my hip I think) but if this makes the start of a ride better why not? I gotta start teaching her to properly park herself for a fence mount or anywhere haha. 

Now when riding we nearly fell over - BOTH of us. Katie is VERY right handed. I mean she was a million times worse a few months ago but she still favours her right. She used to try to trot/canter with her nose at your right foot even on a loose rein, out of choice! Since getting her teeth done she almost completely straight.. on the straight. Ask her to circle left? Falls out and is desperate to go right. Ask for left canter lead? She'll do it if she has to. Today she went on the left lead very willingly but on the long side of the school she apparently, in instructors words: "got her hinds a bit mixed up" and she buckled/tripped - as in her butt basically touched the floor! With me on her! She practically was on her knees - but she caught herself like BOSS and heaved both our butts back up. She immediately tried to continue where we left off... bless her. She was fine. We evaluated her at a walk and trot and then did a right lead canter. Smooth as silk, no hiccups. On our walk later she was fine. Messing with her legs, fine. No reaction along her spine. Just to be paranoid and all. I did ask the instructor if it could have been something I'd done? But she said no, just that Katie is still more unbalanced on the left. But Katie can right lead all day er day at any angle. I don't think I exactly helped though. I'd not ridden in a few weeks, my canter isn't the best and we started off with the harder lead...

It's been only a few months so she might just need more time and conditioning. But I'm gonna contact the vet chiro the yard uses and get her out. Will probably try post some videos if I can catch a lesson with her. 

Nearly 7 months. Time flies.


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## Acadianartist

The two of you sound like you're really clicking! I love the walks along the trail! Harley once stuck his face into our dachshund's and got nipped. Harley was totally confused about it all. Like he couldn't understand that not everyone loves him. He did the same thing to my niece's hairless cat, but this time, we kept Harly on a lead. He was fascinated by this... thing. It was hilarious. The Sphinx, not so fascinated with Harley.

And I fully agree that that give and take, when a horse has the right temperament, is a wonderful feeling. Kodak is like that. With Harley, we have to be have clearer boundaries, lol. 

I wouldn't worry about the tripping unless it happens again. Some horses just aren't that careful, and it's normal for them to have a bad side. I think you're being hard on yourself. But then again, I suppose we all tend to do that as adults I suppose. Just be grateful for Katie, because it sounds like she's grateful for you, and keep smelling those roses.


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## knightrider

From your post, it sounded like you are actually putting water into Katie's ears. I had always been taught not to let water get into your horses' ears, so I googled it to see if what I was taught was wrong. Well, it is and it isn't. Here is the best answer I found. 

Quote:
Too much water can affect their balance. But I seriously doubt you got that much in there. 

He'll most likely be fine. If he's still shaking his head tomorrow...give the vet a ring and ask. It may be more than water if he's still doing it. 

If he's not...I wouldn't worry about it...just take care not to get the water in his ears. Like a dog or cat...it's very irritating and they will shake their heads like crazy. 

black bunny · 1 decade ago 

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well if a human gets water stuck in there ear u know how when u shake ur head u can feel it swinging around in there 

exactly the same for horse but they keep shaking because they have never felt it before and maybe i little confused 

Source(s): 
mwah 
? · 1 decade ago 
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Yes, it's bad to get water in their ears. He may be ok, but it can cause an infection. So keep an eye out for tenderness around his ears. If you notice any goop or a foul smell coming from his ears call the vet asap. 

Hopefully everything will be ok, but be more careful next time. 

Good luck! 

Wonders12 · 1 decade ago 
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It can cause infections and irritate the horse(especially if he is a very sensitive horse). If he continues shaking his head you should talk to a vet. 

azroadrunner05 · 1 decade ago 
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Do be WAY more carefull - Horses are not built like humans or dogs or cats.... 
If he keeps shaking his head the next day CALL the vet. 

Pans'Mom · 1 decade ago 
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if he acts strange I would call the vet, water in the ear can cause infections, but at the same time he might jus be wet and shaking 

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my own personal opinion, nothing else 
Becca · 1 decade ago 
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He will be OK, but he won't like it when you do it. 

http://www.saferhorseracing.com/gpage14.... 

Tom M · 1 decade ago 
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i imagine he'll be fine 
End-quote

From what I read on-line, it sounds like it is better if you don't let water get into your horse's ears, but they will most likely be OK if you do. By the way, I love your journal. It's really fun and interesting to read. Thanks for sharing it!


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## Kalraii

@Acadianartist I am glad it was a dachshund and even then infection is no joke  One little ****** gave me the worst infection in my hand ever from a single tooth puncture. RESPECT for the terriers and sausage dogs hereon! And Katie loves to nuzzle the yard dogs and tries it with them all >.<
@knightrider I re-read my post and you're right it doesn't line up well so you must have this image of me hosing down her eardrums LOL. No wonder you're worried I'd be as well if I did such a ludicrous thing  No no all rummaging was done with my fingers, no water. I like to know that if I gotta treat her ears one day or nostrils that she's at least used to them being touched. The hose water was a trickle down behind her ears/top of her neck for now, she's far too cautious of it to accept a full on hosing. But totally appreciate how it read xD I'm going to bed now giggling away. Nice to know we're looking out for the crazies!


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## Acadianartist

Kalraii said:


> @*Acadianartist* I am glad it was a dachshund and even then infection is no joke  One little ****** gave me the worst infection in my hand ever from a single tooth puncture. RESPECT for the terriers and sausage dogs hereon! And Katie loves to nuzzle the yard dogs and tries it with them all >.<
> 
> @*knightrider* I re-read my post and you're right it doesn't line up well so you must have this image of me hosing down her eardrums LOL. No wonder you're worried I'd be as well if I did such a ludicrous thing  No no all rummaging was done with my fingers, no water. I like to know that if I gotta treat her ears one day or nostrils that she's at least used to them being touched. The hose water was a trickle down behind her ears/top of her neck for now, she's far too cautious of it to accept a full on hosing. But totally appreciate how it read xD I'm going to bed now giggling away. Nice to know we're looking out for the crazies!


Ouch... no, this was more of a scratch, and Harley's feelings were hurt more than anything. He literally went over and stood in a corner with his head hanging down. Too funny. I did put a little balm on it, but it wasn't much. They do say that wiener dogs are among the highest percentage of dogs that bite. They really shouldn't be in families with very young children. But we sure love ours.

You're smart to get Katie used to having your fingers in weird places! Of course you'd know this from your work with exotic pets. Great to desensitize them to all sorts of things for the day you need to treat them. I wouldn't have thought of this, but it was part of the ground work course I did with Kodak. I found Kodak surprisingly cooperative about me putting my fingers up her nose (no word of a lie), in her mouth, her ears, rubbing her eyes, etc, once she realized it was like a game. I put her rope halter on, and she knows we're doing some training, so she patiently stands there while I do all sorts of things to get the neighbors talking. The vet was pleased with how she tolerated her around her head so it must be working. I also ran a nail along her neck, then poked her with it a bit so she wouldn't react to needles.


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## Kalraii

I would be up for trying the nail down her neck but she's had a ton of injections since having her - vaccinations, drawing blood, dentist... heh. It's so anti-climatic but I will bear this in mind for horse number 2 (whoever that is!) XD

It was really nice and cool today, the heat isn't as bad these last few days. But where is lovely England greenery? GONE! That's where! We are no Arizonland or so it feels hehe. 

Katie was a bit tired - she's had all week in the field (which she prefers) and was only brought in this lesson. I left her stabled when I left so she could have a lie down, rest and a good dinner. They've probably already turned her out by now for the cool evening. She's lost her fly mask -.- I put cream on but I'm gonna have to hunt that and buy another. She was a bit sore on her nose and I wonder if it was FROM the fly mask so she took it off? Will see. 

The lesson itself was a lot of fun. I've paid for 10 lessons upfront and will schooling with my instructor every Tues/Thurs. Today we did some leg yielding and OMG.... it was a beautiful thing to experience! It is the most recent thing they have been teaching her during working livery which hasn't been much, in the hot weather. Instructor has even been cancelling lessons as she feels its just pointless and unfair to the horses. But back to leg yielding... in the past when I've leg yielded on school horses I never really felt it. But Katie really MOVES so when she did it I felt all that energy right under me instead of her butt being left behind in Africa. I've never felt that before. Suddenly a big fat light went DING in my head. _This is how it should be._ It was only a glimpse into what might come but it was so surreal to actually FEEL all that power under me, properly. Does that make sense to anyone? Lol. GRAND PRIX HERE I COME! Behehe. But it seems that both Katie and I are right handed coz when we leg yielded on the left rein I couldn't keep up with her. She moved that big butt under me and I got left behind haha! So it was just ungainly and quite impossible to achieve, but she tried bless her even though I couldn't support her through it. But the other rein was good as gold and we were a team woo! She struck off on the left lead in canter on first and second ask! And I managed to sit her trot really in the downward transition. Upward transition am still too bouncy. Guys... it's coming together. Bit by bit. The work my instructor has done with Katie has been amazing. And best of all she was relaxed.

Afterwards I hosed her down and then thought "pants it" I'm gonna hose myself - and washed my hair with horse shampoo LOL. Katie, who was right next to me when I did this, bent over washing my hair, had such a confused expression on her face and was stock still as I did my thing. We then went on a near-hour walk up the trail. Me on foot, leading her. At some point I made a phone call and she was leading on my right, lovely and relaxed, head low, nice expression. And then (coz I was watching her out of the corner of my eye) she nipped me on my arm! It wasn't a meaningful nip or bite by a long shot but it was absolutely "hey get off the phone and pay attention to me!". I asked the person to wait and addressed her verbally "Katie.... what the heck was that for?!" She had the decency to look ashamed.

Then I resume my call and she went to do it again! So before her mouth made contact I waved my arms about and yawned really loudly, just being plain obnoxious. She didn't try again after that but I was sure surprised that she did it in the first place. Once I got off the phone she was fine. She isn't a pushy horse - not even the "harmless" pushiness you see owners let their horses get away with. None of that. I really believe she just didn't like my attention not being on her. Was good to learn though that she can and will be possessive at times and something to watch out for, tut. We met lovely people on the way who petted her and she made friends with a blind dog who liked her back. I was surprised though when a mother let her two young kids run past her back end (I was actually moving her butt out of the way for them to pass but they didn't even wait...) I did give her a heads up about etiquette and explained the dangers of running up behind such a powerful beast. Never worth the risk, man, my heart was in my throat! Katie didn't give a hoot but you just never know...

So really great day. And as usual I write an essay. I think when I develop memory loss though I'll have some great detail xD


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## Acadianartist

Wow, you two sound like you're just having a blast! Keep it up!


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## Kalraii

Another day, another ride. I was sooooooooooo tired today and honestly would have been happy to just lay in her clean stall and die. However, the caffeine kicked in just in time for my lesson. She again had no energy. Last time I did feed her ahead of riding but didn't have enough time due to traffic today. The lovely lush grass that gave her such energy has now turned to dust with this horrible weather, high humidity that never actually brings any freaking RAIN!!!!!!!!!!! LET IT BREAK! PLS! So she'll now be having two feeds a day brought down to her in the field and more consideration of her workload, bringing her in for a sleep and hay on the regular. Thank god to those who strongly recommended I have a stall for her when deciding livery. I can't just put food out with the herd here like I would if it was my own... sigh. 

Anyway the ride. Her nose shape means that she gets rubbed easily. So we have FINALLY DONE AWAY WITH THE NOSEBAND! YES! *fist pump*. She rides JUST the same without it, as I expected personally. I forgot to get a picture though. She must feel 100x more comfortable without it and on the hack it I don't have to struggle to loosen it while mounted. She is such a funny girl. Sometimes she will be so soft in my hands - as in the tiniest nano squeeze and seat to halt. Leg yielding lovely. And there are times she like "nah" LOL and tries to do her own thing. It doesn't take much to get her to concede though, thankfully. She has come so far from where she was begun. I assumed that she rode so nice and relaxed for everyone else. My instructor today, however, said that there is a noticeable difference when I'm riding Katie. She is a lot more relaxed. Some of her regular riders are disconcerted by her forwardness and height, and worrying only makes her more forward. 

Our first canter of the day was on her worse, left lead. She tripped again a second time! She doesn't trip into the canter, it's when its fully established and going seemingly well! It seems to only be with me and only be her first canter! All subsequent canters are a lot more forward, more alert more ... just better! I am told it has little to do with my positioning and that she was not well prepared in herself. However, am I not responsible for the prep? It's not as if we aren't going forward but she's not quite under me (does that make sense? :S) the first canter. There is a HUGE difference in the canters that come after this first one, she's more focused and together? I wish I knew proper lingo. She also runs a little more into the left canter. It's a new arena with a different type of substrate though I can't imagine that to be a real excuse surely? Ah well another ride on Thursday and if it happens again we all know what I'm gonna do...

After our ride, after ending on a good note, we were ushered by instructor to go practice opening gates LOL. She also wants to do a lesson where she is just observing me silently schooling her and correcting me only when needed. She was under the impression that I am afraid of riding Katie alone hehe! Not at all - I am more than happy to hack her out solo even. Does it sound crazy that I don't think I'm good enough to school her alone, though? Maybe this was her way of saying I'm ready to start practising on my own with intermittent lessons. Even when I bought Katie my old (good) instructor said I was good enough to school Katie the basics though I find that super hard to believe. I suppose though where IS the line that says you're good enough? It's different for everyone. My line (or bar) must just be above-average high  As for mounting I can just get anyone to assist if it's necessary. It made me think... I really don't have incentive to do any flatwork alone. I just feel it would be time wasted as I do not feel "qualified" enough to guarantee no bad habits will be instilled... my head. Hacking though? Bring it. Makes no sense. Halp.

So opening gates. Well Katie just a pro she knew exactly where to park herself and how to negotiate it when open. I'm there half hanging on trying to reach it though because of her height hehe. We went only for a short hack as she was tired. Guess what? Today we role-played western haha! She already knows what halt is so I decided to teach her to halt by verbal command only. She knows it anyway but I've never tried doing it _without contact_. So on the buckle at a walk I clear my throat "Um... Katie? Halt pls." She ignores me. I call her name again and her ears flick back. "Halt?" I ask because I am not sure she'll properly understand. Well, once her ears flicked back and she was listening BOOM. She halted still. On the buckle. On the way home. And did not move until I asked her to walk on. I snuck a treat out of my pocket as that was a special occasion! She repeated this several times. Neck reining isn't a option so on the buckle we "leg rein"  Then we did it at a trot. I realised then that maybe I should use a different word or cue heh. But it made me appreciate that I really do have to do better at keeping or getting her attention. I have to communicate better under saddle which is so hard when I'm still uncoordinated >.< I need to stop watching dressage pros sit these huge bum swallowing trots... they make me feel bad. 

Bah. Until Thursday!


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## Acadianartist

You're doing great! Way better than you give yourself credit for. 

I ride alone all the time, or with my daughter and Harley. Granted, a lot of that is just to keep them company. When they jump, we just stand in the middle and watch. We don't mind, Kodak parks herself under our lone tree and enjoys the shade. Or sometimes, we walk or trot on the inside while my daughter and Harley ride along the rail. I use that time to focus on things the coach did with us last. Sometimes we play follow the leader. We set up poles and cones, and do figure 8s or serpentines. I view it as a good way to continue to improve my own riding muscles, and a more relaxed time for us to work on specific things without the pressure of someone watching. 

Keep up the great work!


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## Kalraii

Soooooooo not so much an update about Katie but about my friends, the Wife and Husband. Husband flippantly says he'll ride but the truth is - the better his wife gets, the more he's slipping away. I think he is competitive deep down and dislikes being bad or being watched, while being bad. Either way.. he's a quitttttttttter. But for the last few weeks the Wife has had her share pony, the 30yo dales with an owner, who we are learning more about, who is struggling to afford him. I think if the pony was younger the wife would consider taking him. I've been mentoring her through it - the owner was meant to do that but was very unreliable with turning up, once nearly 3 hours late. So she agreed for me to oversee my friend's share day. 

In the month she's had him she can now tack up and muck out. She's slowly learning things like what grooming brushes are used for. Picking feet. Assembling all his gear and measuring out his feed. We've been discussing things like laminitis, for which he is apparently prone and colic which he's never had. How to properly health check - it kills me when people look without looking. I look and I still miss things >.< We've tack cleaned and bathed him together. I showed her the importance of hand walking and learning to lead. She got very scared the first time he tested her and tried to tank off. She was trying to wrestle him back and as we know that wont work when you're the weight of a peanut. Once you show him you're listening he's VERY good in-hand. Even trotted in-hand. 

Under saddle we tried getting her an instructor but it was too hot for proper lessons. The sand school is too hard on his legs anyway and he has zero conditioning for it... yet. So we've actually been learning how to mount safely alone (funny right?) and hacking out. He moves out MUCH better on the hack like most horses  The first time with me "leading". Ofc he was an angel. We worked on building confidence, mainly confidence in knowing that she can control a situation. She was most scared of him bolting off. She's always been scared of speed but I explained a horse can "bolt" at a walk, too. So we worked on halting him at random locations for varying lengths of time. Just teaching him that standing still is OK. He is a fast learner and I love him the more I know him - he is VERY considerate of his rider, even if friend cannot see that yet. 

Yesterday was her best ride I've ever seen. Not for technicalities, mind you, but mentality. Unfortunately his saddle sits horribly but we dressed him up so I could get some pictures. On a loose rein he actually decided he wanted to hack out, walking _past_ his stable... His ears were pricked forward, his expression happy, all the while the saddle was digging into his withers :/ I feel at this point he's just so used to it... :'< Amazing what horses put up with. It was hard for me because I didn't want her to ride him in that saddle but he was actually asking to go for a walk... So I decided he knows what he wants, he is a stubborn old man after all. I told myself we'll take it easy. 

Friend was extremely confident to my surprise. He was SO relaxed and so was she that I decided not to lead them. I walked behind the entire time, like a ghost, only opening my mouth to suggest things. I think she really trusts him now and doesn't panic so much when he tests her. She continued the halting exercises from last week, they probably help build her confidence in him the most. He's very forward solo which is great BUT there are several different paths and he'll try go down one HE likes. That's when he tests the most - he'll either nap or he'll walk through the bit as he pleases - it's a very small test, he's not crazy pushy or a bully. We worked through both scenarios and she learned that pulling on both reins isn't the answer to everything. She grasped the concept of disengaging and even just turning him and you could see she instantly felt better, more in control. When he pushed through the bit to go in a direction HE wanted she simply just turned him back to the way he wanted, no fuss, no panic. He's such a good horse as well because that's all it takes for him to concede. It was really great to see.

Now the best bits. This pony has walked these trails for years. He knows the part he trots and canters. And he wanted to trot - bearing in mind the saddle. I told them friend that if he wanted to trot, then sure. For the first time in her life she trotted a trail, following no one. I was left behind in eye-distance but I didn't want to run after him in case he thought I was chasing. She stopped him find and waited for me to catch up. This little pony moves so well out on these trails, he looks so happy my heart wanted to explode. So each time it came to trot she did and he went eagerly. Then on the way back there is a very slight incline where apparently his owner always canters him. Well, off they went. She got a bit worried as they neared the end fence. She got him into a walk but he was still excited and forward. You know what she did? Just turn him in a large circle back to me. Before she would have been flat out panicking yanking on both reins. The confidence was smeared all over her face. As he calmed down he stopped for her. When it came to being on the road she was just full of it - fully in control of herself and her horse and her signalling. No stressy weaving, letting him try cross over as he pleased (which is why I am there as backup).

I don't think she realises just yet how monumental this ride was for her but it's these moments I wish I could relive myself  I'm still gonna be with her for a long time yet to get some hours logged but with this pony? Not bad at all


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## knightrider

@Kalraii, you are such a good friend! yay for you!

Although the saddle might dig his shoulders, he still might like it. My Isabeau is very clear about what saddles she accepts on her back, and ones that appear to fit fine are some she does NOT like. I have one that appears to fit her horribly, but she seems to love it. She never kicks out, spins, or backs up when that ill-fitting saddle is placed on her back.

Also, I have a dandy book called _What Horses Say: How to Hear, Help, and Heal Them_ by Anna Clemence Mews and Julie Decker. One of the examples in the book tells about a saddle fitter who came out to fit a saddle to one of the horses at the same time the horse communicator was there. After the saddle fitter found just the right saddle that fit the horse well, the horse communicator asked the horse if that saddle was better. "No," the horse told her, "I like my original saddle the best." So much for saddle fit!

I don't need an animal communicator for Isabeau. She tells me loud and clear all the time what she wants and does not want.


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## Kalraii

*Manure Management, Flies and Strangles*

We are now just waiting for the 8th August to roll around so we can get this CT scan over with. Katie reacted very badly to the wasp venom even after. In fact, every sting has calcified in reaction and she's on antibiotics. Apparently a few local yards have come down with strangles. Unfortunately this yard is big, get's a lot of traffic. So I have been asked to try not ride elsewhere which is fair. I am concerned about hiring transport (I have no choice) for the vet visit. He's got good rep but y'know I can't see him sterilising his lorry between every horse or vigilantly enough... soooo much stress!

Today was a bit of a shock. I bought a fly mask on my way as she'd lost hers. But I never realised how dire things were. The field is like a sea of manure. There is very likely ZERO management now. And this means.... flies are out of control. I've never worked at a yard before where the fields weren't poo picked. At one place we poo picked every morning and would clean up (completely) 5 or 6 acres with around 40 horses worth. So a LOT of poo picking with a tractor in tow. But the fields were great. 

I turned up 10 minutes after Katie had been put out. The staff told me the flies were better at this time. MY BOOHOLE IT WAS!!! I actually couldn't see Katie's face. There were so many flies that had swarmed her like a walking carcass. It was so bad that, very unlike her, when she heard me call her name she RAN to me and stuffed her face in that headcollar, puffing and shaking her head. I'm sure the wasp attack last week didn't help but even without that... the other horses that are on 24/7 turnout, no shelter, no fly masks. Their heads were dropped and they looked like they'd given up. There must have been thousands of flies. The field was THICK with them. They were getting in her wounds as well. It gets worse - they begin to swarm ME! They are going in my nose and my mouth - my ears. They are now buzzing and trapped in my top. No shaking nothing deters them off me! So get this.... Katie and I bolted for the gate TOGETHER. I was running and she was cantering with me hanging onto her mane. If I could have got on I would have at this point!!!!

Anyway we make it to the yard atop the hill and the flies leave us be. Honestly, Katie was puffing as well. We were both traumatised. Seriously... heck that. Many other owners were absolutely fuming about the state of some horses out in the fields, covered that badly in flies. So it wasn't just me who found this disparaging. I mean what else do they expect? The field is a manure dump at this point... it made me realise turnout isn't ALWAYS good... o,O 

We did some ground work in the arena as she isn't in work. I tried my hand at lunging her at a walk. I'm terrible at lunging so my goal was just to keep a nice circle was all. Well.. went perfect. Then I unclipped her. Get this... in a rectangular arena I "round penned her". I mean... she lunged herself without a line. It was beautiful! I had no idea that this was even a thing! She did have a hissy fit and squealed when I asked for a trot but got over that quick. Then we worked more on lifting each leg in random orders so she had to be on her toes. And I got on a mounting step and worked on just leaning over her bare back, unclipped and having her just stand nicely. Then she had a jolly good roll, buck and a fart. 

I bathed her. People like chatting and I am not 100% sure that Princess Katie does NOT like being ignored. I was distracted and she lifted a hind leg!!!! Twice! She doesn't like being bathed so I think it being delayed for no good reason she wanted to tell me off. She didn't actually swat with her leg but absolutely made it clear it was a threat because the moment I glared at her she put it back down and did a cute "pay me attention" pose. I could have strangled her. Thing is...it was not a good place to correct her and the people just wouldn't stop talking to me... >.< So I just told them I was busy and got on with it. She never exhibits this kind of behaviour when I am alone and focused, but then again she mostly has my undivided attention. She did this before... when I was on the phone. So it's now something I need to bear in mind. She's not as dumb as she pretends, she's most definitely a mare under that stoic mask 

Katie got a good soaking in fly repellent, being very careful to sponge away from her sores. And then I gave her her THIRD feed of the day. There is literally nothing in the field and she was losing weight. Fortunately we caught it in good time to begin proper feeding as she's not lost more. Have to bear in mind she's not in work so will need to balance it out a bit further on. Am crazy. I rather enjoy watching her eat... or just BE. So after all the fun I just put on her mask and watched her eat. I sit ON THE FLOOR as my feet ache by this time, however, before anyone panics the stall door is open (a bar across) and my left butt cheek is on the ledge. I would only need to lean or roll left to be out of the stall completely in a pinch. Cannot tell you how much Katie loves dipping her hay in water so after the picture I got her a bucket.









So after a good rest and munch we prepared for war with the flies. Got Battle Katie ready.


















... only to get to the field for Katie refuse to mingle with her friends. I unclipped her and tried to play with her. Nope. Tried to get her to follow me down to her friends. Nope. She just stayed close to the gate and when I went back she followed me to it and kept nudging me. I held up the headcollar and she began to try stuff her nose in it. :< :< :< :< :<

So I brought her all the way up the hill back to the yard and undressed her. Piled her up with hay and left her there, looking content.


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> *Manure Management, Flies and Strangles*
> 
> I mean... she lunged herself without a line. It was beautiful!


Do I have the video for you!! It's quite impressive when that happens with a horse you meet for the first time... Have patience with the dude in the video...he'll get to the point, I promise.


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## Acadianartist

Well, lots going on with Katie again! Turnout is great, but has to be adapted to each season, and manure has to be picked up unless you have a hundred acres! I pick up poop daily to keep my pastures from getting gross. And of course since they are free to come and go, it means they don't have to be out when the flies are at their worst. I realize you don't have that option, but couldn't the barn let the horses out at times when there are less? At night even? It doesn't sound like turnout is much right now though... another reason to move her eventually. Once you get all your answers about her health of course.

As for Strangles, we had a pretty bad outbreak here earlier in the summer. Virkon is your friend, assuming they sell it in the UK. Anytime you go to another barn, change your clothes, have a shower, spray everything you can't wash with a Virkon solution (such as boots). We did it religiously for weeks. I still disinfect the entire interior of the trailer I rent each time I use it (which is weekly these days). I make a big bucket of Virkon solution and splash it on walls, partition, breast bar, butt barn, floor, door... everything but the ceiling. Every time. You could carry a bottle of spray and do at least a quick job in the trailer that is transporting Katie before she loads. I had a saddle fitter who would even spray the tires of her car for each new barn she went to. My trimmer used Virkon on all her tools each time. It was a bit of a pain, but the outbreak died down, and my horses are thankfully perfectly fine. 

And I had Kodak doing circles around me at liberty! It's so much fun. So awesome that the two of you are doing all these spontaneous things together. She seems to really enjoy your company.


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## Acadianartist

Cool video @mmshiro!


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## tinyliny

@mmshiro


I made it half way through. I know what he means, but not all of his way of verbalizing that. 

I did like his talking about the sort of power of the 30 foot diameter circle.
I'm going to guess this is due to it being about the biggest distance a horse can very quickly leap over and 'discipline' another, before that hrose can escape.


But, there IS a sort of magnetic force that keeps the animals together, just as birds fly a certain distance from each other, and maintain that throughout complicated flock maneuvers.
Horses want things to be unchanged, and stable. That is why they are so good for therapy; they seek the 'wa' (Japanese word meaning peace/steadiness/tranquility in their relations with each other, and humans. But, lke the 'dude' said, they have their own idea on that, and we have ours. But, it is precisely because they DO have that desire to 'get along' that we able to tame them and get them to satisfied to work with and for us.


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## Kalraii

Thank you @mmshiro that makes sense. Next time will try bear that in mind. Was a total fluke and surprise yday. @Acadianartist the staff leave at 5pm. I tried turning her out at 8.30pm and it wasn't much better. I HATE THIS WEATHER SO MUCH! haha >.<


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## Acadianartist

Kalraii said:


> Thank you @mmshiro that makes sense. Next time will try bear that in mind. Was a total fluke and surprise yday. @Acadianartist the staff leave at 5pm. I tried turning her out at 8.30pm and it wasn't much better. I HATE THIS WEATHER SO MUCH! haha >.<


I don't "like" that, but am commiserating. I also hate this heat. I am looking forward to winter. Remind me of this when I'm complaining that it's -37C. To be fair, it would be nice to be somewhere in the middle of -30 and +40C.


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## Kalraii

I am very crabby RN. My friend, aka "the wife" on this thread has just done it. I am quite tolerant of being taken advantage of especially since the joy of seeing her progress at something I love outweighed any negative feelings I had. I mean it's harmless stuff but I'm DONE. Despite knowing Katie's drama, friend has promised and cancelled several times to visit Katie - was her idea, I never asked! As an experiment I offered her to come ride and what do you know - suddenly she had time and was dropping stuff for the following day she was that excited. I rescinded the offer ofc.

Despite having been told 4 times (I'm sad, I counted the messages) and once in person she still asks: "when is Katie coming down to **** stable. I'm looking forward to riding her more!"

Her share agreement was that the owner was meant to mentor her. Then it became me. We were meant to meet at 1pm. It's gotten earlier each time so now friend is getting there for 9am tomorrow. This means that Sirrus will go 30 hours without being mucked out. I do appreciate that its better to ride earlier but it's the mucking out that bothers me more. He's an old boy, he wees a lot! Informed owner of time change and she doesn't mind. Personally, I'd be livid. I AM livid.

Because I also can't get there at 9am. I'm car sharing until we buy another one (delayed coz vets and for safety) and with my schedule I had to move stuff around a LOT to be able to make the time to mentor her regularly on a Sunday, for free ofc. Frankly without me the share never would have been possible. Coz "friends". I wanted to give her the opportunities that were denied me as no one gave me a chance. Her husband is going with her tomorrow so I imagine she will want to show off all she knows. I wonder if this was intentional to avoid me? But.. I have all the saddle wither relief pads.... she REALLY going to ride in that saddle as it is? Is she really gonna try something stupid to impress him? I'm at a point where I'm now actually trying to shuffle things around because I'm concerned that this is exactly how accidents happen...

Lastly, yesterday was meant to be preparing to move Katie. Ofc that was cancelled AGES ago. Friend text me to say that she took a friend to the longines GCT (which I told her about). Show jumping event in london. Thing is I wasn't invited and she was texting me throughout for an explanation of the rules and terminology! So here I am imagining her acting all "horseified" to her non-horsey friend, who is a doctor  

But you know how you keep putting up with it out of SHEER curiosity at how dumb or selfish a person can be? I feel like that... like really... people aren't like this, surely? She's 30 years old this isn't high school! But then there are times I see something in her but she's too inconsistent for my liking and I cannot say I've not tried. I really do try give people the benefit of doubt...


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## Acadianartist

Eeeek, yes, you need to stop being so nice. I know the feeling though. There are some who are givers, and some who are takers. It's rare to find that friendship where there is give and take on both sides. Given what's going on with Katie right now, I'd tell your "friend" that she needs to figure something out so she can ride this other horse without you mentoring her. At least for now, until you get Katie sorted out. Give yourself a break from it.


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## Kalraii

Today's Update

Ended up arriving just after 11am for share day. The couple Wife and Husband were there. They actually waited for me. Adjusted the saddle pads for the old boy and man... he did not stumble ONCE and he was so much more forward in both the arena and hack. The Husband had not been around horses in months by this point but boy did he try take everything over. Unlike him he was trying to tack him, groom you name it. He is a big worrier though, very anxious to the point of being considered condescending, actually. "You sure you know how to mount?" sort of speech towards his Wife who has been learning a lot with her share pony and I.

He watched his wife tack up and mount ALONE and go take the old boy for a warmup in the school. During this time the Husband and I chatted. You actually will not believe this next part but has been verified. He has made some new "snobby" friends. His view on upper class people while trying to get IN with "that ilk" (his view).. He told them he rides but not to which degree and knowing him, probably beefed himself up. Well he has been officially invited to come out and ride with these new people, see if polo is something he likes. The location is known. Out of earshot the wife did confirm this with me and that her husband beefed himself up... LOL. And to top it off I have been asked to help assist in getting him a month of intensive private lessons. A month.. to get polo worthy. It's not gonna happen obviously but I sincerely hope he takes the lessons. I think the big draw for him is that they are men. He really doesn't like riding with or being instructed by women and has suddenly found a new clique to get with on his level. REAL manly horsemen on a level in which is respects... >.< First private lesson has been booked at a good yard on Friday.

*THE HACK*

After the warmup we decided to go out on the trail. We have to go up the road itself to reach the entrance on the other side. As we were approaching the road I asked her to shorten her reins as she had CONSIDERABLE slack in them. She replied with "I don't need to, I know he will not run away." Cue glare. I ORDER her to shorten her reins and she argued with me about it, repeating that she knows the pony now. I actually took hold of the reins as we were on the road (because she hadn't halted, was too busy arguing back, fortunately I was looking....) and led him. I told her VERY firmly that she should not get complacent, just because he hasn't played up yet doesn't mean he wont. 

Husband and I ghosted behind, letting her do her thing as the trail is very linear and safe from roads now, except the way we came. Old boy was nice and forward, seemed to be moving much better, holding himself better to my inexpert eye. More surefooted and zero stumbling. I like to think it was because he was more comfy with his back. You know how some days some horses are just restless and can't stand still? That was him today. He just wanted to GO, in old man fashion. Totally harmless really. He WOULD halt but he didn't want to wait around. But this scared her. And she got her reins tangled up somehow trying to gather them up and fumbling. And then the pony was doing circles on the spot. Wife in her panic had her reins literally up by her chin pulling back HARD, the poor boy was doing circles to get her off his case. Husband began SHOUTING "HALT HALT HALT" and was flailing around. Pony getting more wound up. Husband REALLY not helping... I grabbed a hold and asked her to let go and he relaxed immediately. He still couldn't stand still so we just began walking. I asked husband to leave us be and he did, to his credit. If this was Katie, she would have _lost her mind_.

The old boy continued to test her throughout the entire ride which I personally though was GREAT. He had three small spooks, which was a first for him. Two were at a hose and one was at a ditch to our far right (not a real spook, more just pointing it out to us). I believe it is because she was distracted herself and not properly riding him. She got to experience that and learn what he was trying to say to her! He's very clever and knew he had her number, today. But as we progressed she got less concerned about it all and just.. handled it better. He began to behave better, too. She was frightened to trot him but I explained that it would actually help relax him, she needed to let go and stop bracing in her worry. And so they trotted a short stretch and guess what? He stopped perfectly after for me to catch up. And it seemed to have an immediate effect on her. A horse can still be restless and obedient. A horse can be forward and still stop when asked. By the end of the ride everything was all good again and she felt confident to canter him on the usual stretch. He stopped perfect again after. I really love this pony. 

Thing is when we got to the road to go home - he would not stop. Not at all. He would stop for me, on the ground, but totally and completely ignored her and would have happily cut across the traffic if not for me. This is his reputation that other riders told us. When he decides its time to go home he will ignore his rider, even if its at a "harmless walk". He had never shown us this vice before but I'm glad he did - it proved to her that she must never relax, especially on the road with loose reins! 

A VERY good lesson day, even if she came away feeling exhausted and slightly defeated. It was funny because before the ride she and her husband were chatting about how they think she might soon have to find a new, spunkier share for her, that she can jump on. Hm.


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## mmshiro

Kalraii said:


> And she got her reins tangled up somehow trying to gather them up and fumbling. And then the pony was doing circles on the spot. Wife in her panic had her reins literally up by her chin pulling back HARD, the poor boy was doing circles to get her off his case. Husband began SHOUTING "HALT HALT HALT" and was flailing around.


Ha, ha! Time stamp 3:16:


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## Kalraii

@mmshiro she KNOWS this... I've been there as several instructors have told her. I've repeated it many times myself... she had that ride on Katie... She can canter so it's not as if she can't sit it. Thing is he was bolting at a walk... not even a canter. And you know how some people are, they aren't thinking "oh my horse is walking" they are thinking "I can't control him . hes gonna gallop any second now". So instead of just allowing the walk and working with it, she is the one escalating in anticipation of a true bolt. Honestly you would think he was running off at a high speed with the way she reacted  I did tell her if it was that bad and he's just walking... get off. She knows this, I've said it before. But it's hard to practice I guess when you think you're gonna die lol...

It's the first time in a very long time she has been like this, all her rides have been quiet and fairly controlled so far. I believe having her husband panicking and screeching at her didn't exactly help. It would have been much easier to relay instructions if it wasn't for him trying to drown me out >.< I think having him with us was a distraction and the pony took advantage of that. She is not ready to autopilot though I disagree with auto-piloting in general - I think we share the same feelings on that matter.


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## Kalraii

Phew so much been happening hard to keep up with journal. Will give most recent stuff. CT scan updates are here: https://www.horseforum.com/new-horses/ct-results-793187/page4/

I am riding Katie but I am also riding elsewhere for lessons. I like riding different horses different places. I get to practice two-point on a horse that will pace itself for starters heh. I've ridden 5 times this week which for me is a LOT. Could barely walk today lol. Riding tomorrow again. I start a new job next week so it'll be evening runs under floodlights soon  I still feel insecure about riding Katie in the arena without supervision. I prefer hacking her alone and we do go for a mad canter so it's really not a fear of her or being alone. It is a fear of schooling her wrong. I find it so stupid but in the moment I'm like "I'm just gonna ride like a pleb" and think it's more fun for her to put up with me on a hack. So we compromise. We have a lesson with the instructor and then we go for a hack. LOL. I keep telling myself there is no rush. Once I feel a bit more secure about my riding ability I will naturally feel more comfortable schooling her alone. 


*Husband and Wife*

The Husband was invited to play polo after telling some friends he could ride. So he's been a bit stressy wanting to get as many hours under his belt this month to get "polo worthy". Not happening ofc but he has improved. He is riding better now than he ever did before. Except when hacking. Hacking he is a disaster. Remember, last time he hacked he let the horse take it's bridle off on a tree and the one before that he egged his horse into a gallop past the instructor. Instructor asked if he would like to go on a long hack. He'd been riding so well so in CONTROL of his horse in the arena that she was very happy to take him out. He had improved a LOT I promise you. But: DISASTER. He managed to overtake 9 other horses and the instructor, became lead file and unable to halt. He froze. Like I was asking him to pull his hands to his belly button (he had long reins and wasn't able to process shortening them?) and he said he was. He was shouting that he was. But looking at him he wasn't moving an inch or trying. I think he completely disconnected from his body in his panic. We talked about it after and he insists he was pulling back to halt but we all saw that he just sat there like a potato with arms outstretched. So he thinks he did, but he didn't. VERY strange... He also was unable to canter and instructor much prefers people learning or in his case re-learning canter on a hack. But when he needed to _go_ he couldn't go. So the rest of us were trapped behind him. He was sent back to the line but even then somehow managed to get in the middle. I feel sorry for him and for the other riders with us. I cannot blame the instructor. He really was riding very well in the arena, was so relaxed and confident in himself. Literally the best he's ever ridden in over a year. Pfffft. But he's now deemed not safe and will be on "hack-ban" for a while yet. I think he really needs a lot more support in general.

The Wife is doing very well. Like reallllllllllly well. She has worked her butt off to get out the habit of slipping feet through stirrups and now she keeps her stirrups better than I do! As a couple they can be a pain in the you-know-what but I gotta credit her determination. Still needs to get her butt in the saddle more in canter but she is finally becoming a real rider in mentality. She is beginning to see horses for their individuality and learning how to deal with cheeky horse behaviour. She is panicking less and less now which obviously is key to staying in control. It wont be long before she can begin learning how to jump. However, it's been a few months now and last share day you won't believe it. She very delicately and with such precision *put the saddle on backwards.* Even tried putting the girth through the breastplate loop. I was happy just waiting for her to realise her mistake (while trying to contain my laughter) but a young child pointed it out to her. I've never seen her go such a deep shade of red HAHA. And another time she crossed the reins when bridling and has tried numerous times to mount up without doing the girth or bringing the stirrups down. She has put the ENTIRE brow-band over the poor boys ears, with bit UNDER the chin and said it looked fine... Don't worry, I never actually let her mount up without correcting mistakes first. That's why I'm there. And she likes leaving the head collar around his neck and walks away without putting it on fully. Oh and dismounting and walking away - leaving him standing there free willy which isn't appropriate given the layout. And tries to immediately take the saddle off without undoing the breastplate. This pony is an angel and while nothing she's done directly hurts him and he is pretty chill, it sure would irritate some other horses >.<. The things I mentioned are the ones I've allowed to happen because he is so well tempered and I would constantly remind her "you have made a mistake, try look again and see". But she never really sees, not yet. She was taught to tack up a year ago and every week has been tacking up. But all these little unresolved issues means I am still not happy for her to maintain her share arrangement alone. So I am still losing a quarter of my weekend. RIP. She keeps asking when she can ride Katie. Little does she know that if she made an effort to be involved with Katie and I, I would be more willing. But if all she sees is a free ride then my answer will ALWAYS be "no" >.<


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## Acadianartist

Wow... those friends of yours sure are an interesting pair! They're making progress and yet... not? Bizarre. Is it possible that the wife is so dependant on you that she's not paying attention to tack issues? I mean, what would happen if you weren't there? Say you couldn't make it some weekend? Would she go without you? Maybe try letting her...


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## Kalraii

Work has been really taking it's toll on me. I've basically only been able to see Katie at weekends. I have animals at home that need me as well and while I tried making a few weekday visits it near killed me using London public transport. I freaking HATE public transport. Speficically in London. In rush hour. I can't even drive to work as the parking costs £25 a day (with staff discount may I add).


Between work and her lameness episode I haven't ridden in a month. The staff there and my instructor have been a HUGE help in basically being being her "owners" while I can't! Lifesavers (she says, while paying them for that exact service hehe). When I turned up last weekend and took her for a handwalk the staff and other DIY owners were almost disgusted that I didn't ride! I was pretty taken aback at their pushiness to get me to ride. But when I haven't seen my horse for the last week the LAST thing I want to do is get on her back.. I'm not a good enough rider to have that ridden "bond" you gatekeepers talk about  I'm not *there* yet and I remembered what some of you said about lessening the pressure on myself. I'm not going anywhere, she's not going anywhere. We're ok. 



But that's not to say I don't have plans. Oh boy the date is set! *On the 26th of November we are moving to our new yard*. I will miss this place and dearly miss the staff and instructor but I go on knowing that once I get my own trailer I'll be back for lessons and driving all over the place and exploring the world with Katie-poo-poo-pants. I am actually crapping myself if I'm honest. But if I don't move I will never properly start much less progress. Ok, she's gonna be used as working livery but it's going to be hacking out with buddies and I will be seeing her so often that I can better monitor her mental and physica state. And the biggest plus? _*It is 15 minutes drive or 30 mins cycle from my house.*_ I can get home from work, refresh myself and drive there for 7pm. Which yes, is still late. But it's also 15mins from home. I wont be killing myself in the process. I cannot wait for the English weather to sit in and it be p***ing down with rain and I'm covered in horse instead of feeling guilty and stuck on the bus. I cannot wait to give her a fluffy bed just how I like it. I have been given several freelance instructors that I can call in to maybe come in the evenings or weekends to better fit my schedule. I've been told I can tag along on their paid hacks (for free) just for safety and company in the beginning. 



However, I very likely have to buy a new saddle. Her current one is extremtly heavy. It's an old bates GP and it fits her well and is VERY comfortable but people can barely lift it onto her due to her height, or off, for that matter, so I am more inclined to buy a lighter one as I really dislike people catching her wither to slide/pull it off. I'm quite tight with money atm as I really want to keep a safety buffer and a saddle isn't such high priority right now. Just something to bear in mind. I will get a custom-made probably early next year. 



Since she will be worked and very likely rugged I will be getting her clipped. I personally think it's cleaner for a horse that sweats in work and her winter coat is a little pathetic haha. Not a cob she is. My biggest regret is that I really wanted to pull her shoes and give her a few months off . I still want to. I feel guiltly not doing it. I'm praying that she can go another half year at least to settle enough that I can start thinking about giving her a "shoeless holiday". 



The amazing thing about all this is that there is a livery yard 5 minutes from my house. I must be crazy. But there is zero support. No staff, just a grounds keeper who supplies the hay and takes away the manure. I have no horsey friends much less any I can depend on to help me. No instructors. No riding arena. Lots of road hacking to reach a nice park. But it would now be the PERFECT place to bring her down for a holiday. The fields are massive! 



Anyway... essay over. Phew. I'm tired now!


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## Acadianartist

No guilt. You will be FINE! Katie will be happy, and you will get to see her all the time. You'll love it. Trust yourself to know what's best for both of you.


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## SilverMaple

If people are struggling with the weight of the saddle, have them 'swing it up' like they would if it was a western saddle that weighed 50 pounds. 









A local riding for the disabled place teaches their helpers to do this, as so many of the horses are huge draft crosses and the helpers are tiny. They do it with both western and english saddles. It takes a few tries to get the hang of it, but it does make it easier. I showed my english-riding friend with a 82 -lb daughter who struggles to get her saddle up on her 16 hh horse this trick. She does it easily now.


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## Kalraii

Thank you @Acadianartist and @SilverMaple I will absolutely bear that in mind. I personally don't struggle (at 166cm) but some of the others do >.< 



Update: I've still not been able to see her. But every single day I tell myself not long now. 25 days to be exact. BUT... she's still lame, apparently. The vet, the chiro and my instructor say something is off with her right hind. Lingering issue from the suspected field incident. She's not in work currently and can only be ridden at a walk. I wish I was more involved in the whole process... but I'm stressing as everything is booked for the move. Even if she is still lame (imperceptable to me but the multiple experts around me say she IS lame so I'm inclined to believe it) then I would like to move her. I just worry because this place is ONLY working livery and a horse that can't be ridden is next to useless to them... hopefully they are kind enough to have patience. If it doesn't work out I have plan C and a plan D.


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## Acadianartist

Kalraii said:


> Thank you @*Acadianartist* and @*SilverMaple* I will absolutely bear that in mind. I personally don't struggle (at 166cm) but some of the others do >.<
> 
> 
> 
> Update: I've still not been able to see her. But every single day I tell myself not long now. 25 days to be exact. BUT... she's still lame, apparently. The vet, the chiro and my instructor say something is off with her right hind. Lingering issue from the suspected field incident. She's not in work currently and can only be ridden at a walk. I wish I was more involved in the whole process... but I'm stressing as everything is booked for the move. Even if she is still lame (imperceptable to me but the multiple experts around me say she IS lame so I'm inclined to believe it) then I would like to move her. I just worry because this place is ONLY working livery and a horse that can't be ridden is next to useless to them... hopefully they are kind enough to have patience. If it doesn't work out I have plan C and a plan D.


Hmmm, odd that you don't see it, but yeah, I suppose they know what they're doing. I see my horses' lameness before anyone else, but maybe it's just because you don't see her as often as I see my horses, given that they're in my backyard. I agree - move her anyway. In 25 days she might be just fine.


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## Kalraii

@Acadianartist I agree with you. If I saw her daily I might see it myself or even if I just rode her daily. 



I got a text a few hours ago. She apparently has injured herself in the field again. Has two wounds that will need veterinary attention first thing tomorrow morning. They have stabled her, started on antibiotics and cleaned them. I don't even know where the wounds are or how big they are? I will see tomorrow at least. She apparently is STILL sore on her right hind. 



I wonder if she's bored or there is something wrong in the herd that she has had two field accidents? Or maybe there isn't enough grazing (there isn't I know) that she's been turned out too long and wants to come in to eat? I can't answer any of these questions. She is on day turnout currently. She is a smart girl and needs her brain stimulated.... well any horse deserves that I think. I know she appreciates it. 24 days guys. 24 days until I can see her EVERY evening if I wanted to...


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## knightrider

Awww, how frustrating. I would be beside myself with anxiety. It's bad enough when my horse gets injured in my back pasture, but to not know, not be there, not be able to evaluate it . . . misery.

I tried the saddle placing like in the video and LOVED it! I think mine was beginner's luck. It worked perfectly the first time, and he suggested practice. I am thinking I'll get practice every morning, so I just went straight to trying it. If I had a saddle that fit my horse well and was super comfortable, I think I'd keep it, no matter how heavy it is. Putting the saddle on the way @SilverMaple's video showed was very effective.


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## Acadianartist

Kalraii said:


> @*Acadianartist* I agree with you. If I saw her daily I might see it myself or even if I just rode her daily.
> 
> 
> 
> I got a text a few hours ago. She apparently has injured herself in the field again. Has two wounds that will need veterinary attention first thing tomorrow morning. They have stabled her, started on antibiotics and cleaned them. I don't even know where the wounds are or how big they are? I will see tomorrow at least. She apparently is STILL sore on her right hind.
> 
> 
> 
> I wonder if she's bored or there is something wrong in the herd that she has had two field accidents? Or maybe there isn't enough grazing (there isn't I know) that she's been turned out too long and wants to come in to eat? I can't answer any of these questions. She is on day turnout currently. She is a smart girl and needs her brain stimulated.... well any horse deserves that I think. I know she appreciates it. 24 days guys. 24 days until I can see her EVERY evening if I wanted to...


Oh no... And I didn't mean that as a jab at you for not seeing her every day -- but I think you know that. I'm kind of wondering how bad this "lameness" really is if you can't see it in your own horse. Sorry I didn't make that clear.

As for the new injury... if it were me, I'd be worried. What exactly do they say has caused this injury? I find it odd that she keeps hurting herself in the field. Is it a kicking injury? Is she hurting herself on something out there? I mean, some horses do just seem to be very accident prone, but some turnouts are just unsafe. It all sounds a bit odd to me. I'd stick to my plan of moving her so you can be more involved in her care and see these things happen for yourself. I would not be comfortable keeping my horse in a situation where it keeps getting injured. But as I said, some horses do seem accident prone.


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## Kalraii

No I didn't take it like that I promise @Acadianartist. I literally agree with you <3


I do feel a bit suspicious and then feel guilty for feeling that. Last time I wanted to move, the week before, the instructor advised me to stay and investigate her head issues. I did and was glad I did. I was worried that second time around things would crop up. And not long after I gave my new moving date Katie has:


1. had an infection where she was apparently walking drunk. I was told she had severe ataxia. I never saw this myself but the vet did and the staff did

2. has a weak hind end in general which was only flagged up recently despite being seen regularly by the vet for months on end and under the expert eye of my instructor. I have had to pay to have her hacked out daily at a walk up hills... no joke

3. is lame on her right hind but I cannot tell :<

4. now hurt herself in the field
5. since giving my moving date her monthly livery cost has gone up by a few hundred quid just for the extra illness/injury maintenance she's needed



I am not saying anyone is intentionally hurting her and you're right it could be coincindence. But maybe its more a "well shes moving so the welfare isn't as important as it was when she was being used for our lessons" case scenario??? It just overall really upsets me. It could just be coincednce. But the two worst times in terms of vets and illness have cropped up right before a move... (not including the wasp attack).


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## Acadianartist

Yeah, that's just weird. I'm not suggesting any wrongdoing, but I'd take her out of there. Which you are doing, so kudos. Meantime, I guess you have to rely on what they're telling you, but it all seems a bit odd. Count down the days, and see how she does at the new place. That will give you some degree of certainty as to whether she is just really accident prone, or whether her care/living conditions have something to do with it. This must be torture for you. But it will go by fast... and then at least you will be close enough to know what is really going on. I hope this all comes to an end and that you and Katie can have lots of fun bonding at the new place!


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## Kalraii

5 days until she moves. I've not been able to see her much but in FIVE DAYS THAT WILL SOON CHANGE. I WILL BE SEEING HER EVERYDAY at least for a week until she's settled then it will be 4x a week oh no, how terrible... 



She is still being exercised and still weak in her hind. The new yard are very understanding and she will be on full livery for £700 a month, including everything and exercise. They really only do working livery but are very reasonable in their expectations and are already arranging a visit so they can discuss Katie's new regime with vet. EDIT: just to be very clear she will not be on working livery until she's fit and healthy and even then working livery means going for an hour hack across soem beautiful terrain at an easy pace. Oh no.. what a hard life.



In my heart though I feel sorry for Katie. She's just settled in really and I'm moving her already... but I will at least be able to see her properly and be her regular human for playtime. She's a horse that needs a purpoe in life and right now it's very stagnant. I will massively miss my instructor who has been a saviour in so many ways and the other staff that have looked after her. It's just time I get to do more of that myself...

*FIVE DAYS!*


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## Acadianartist

Yay! You will love it. I moved Harley after only a month and a half at the boarding barn we initially kept him in. It just wasn't working for us. My neighbors agreed to take him in, and it was awesome to have him so close! He spent the next 8 months or so there, and then finally, he moved into our backyard. I never regretted any of those moves. 

This will allow you to monitor Katie much more closely. She'll be fine. Better than fine, she'll get to see you so much more!


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## Kalraii

*32 hours* until I am in the lorry ready to bring Katie to her new home. I am really anxious >.< And excited. And guilty for putting her through a move again... phew...


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## Acadianartist

Kalraii said:


> *32 hours* until I am in the lorry ready to bring Katie to her new home. I am really anxious >.< And excited. And guilty for putting her through a move again... phew...


No guilt. You are doing what's best for her! So excited for you both. You will have the best Christmas ever!


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## Kalraii

Phew so the move happened. I was so anxious thought I was gonna be sick and the move is NOTHING compared to some baha. We're talknig a 40minute drive! I travelled with the owner's partner to pick her up in his 5 horse lorry. When I arrived a few members of staff were there saying their goodbyes. As we began packnig stuff up some started to get a bit teary which was horrible for me. Despite everyone being there I witnessed some of the most awful weaving from her. Like pacing, panicking, side to side. She actually has got some scratches and worn away her fur so it's obviously been going on in the last fortnight I haven't seen her. What was worse though was her best stable friend next door began SCREAMING as we took her away and loaded her. As he started shouting I nearly bawled my eyes out. Yard manager loaded Katie but the panels inside weren't set at a diagonal so she had to be brought out at again and she BOLTED off. The driver nearly got taken down off the ramp and YM ran after her and I was in shock, and then just laughed. It was totally fine, a short bolt to the field gate and when she came up she loaded perfect. And that was that. All in all it took 15mins from arrival to leaving :< It was very nice to have people see us off. I am disappionted that the instructor never came out to say goodbye on Sunday evening and today. She lives on site. I did message her and she responded sometime after saying she had a headache and wished us well. I feel like maybe I've upset her or something.. or maybe she doesn't care as much since Katie is not longer on her lesson regime? I really don't know. Maybe I read too much into her kindness previously or maybe she couldn't bear saying goodbye. I'll never know I guess... :'<


*So NEW yard.* Came off the lorry fine and walked her around the car park (gated off from the road). Handled it like a pro obviously. There are two cons to this yard:


- the stalls are too small really with the sloping roof making the door frame quite low. She has spare room to turn around and roll etc inside but I really would prefer a stall that could fit three draughts if you get me. But really not a huge deal. Fortunately as a serial giraffer she couldn't care less about her head banging anything though I know it's a concern for some people/horses who would go mental if they felt trapped. I've lose count of the times she banged her head and just responded "whoops" and got on with life. 



- no rubber mats. I have actually asked if I can purchase some as I really don't want her standing on concrete when stabled, even with straw. Am I being a princess heh?


But there are so many pros that outweigh any of the above and tons of turnout. I cannot believe she is now only 15 minutes from my house. Met some of the staff and chatted. They are very relaxed. They only have 25 horses and that much capacity so Katie took up the last slot! I took her for a walk around the arena. She was a bit spooky understandably but did very well sniffing the scary purple mounting block and the random glove on the floor. Didn't cross her mind to try gallop off at all and it was funny as the staff were a little uncertain about me taking her out. 



Tomorrow the staff will get on and give her a warmup in the arena. If they feel safe they will take her on a short hack locally. They also know the lady who sold Katie to me, as they bought a few of their RDA horses from her directly which really helps in Katie's reference bahaha. The vet and owner know each other very well - the same vet used to be their main! So hopefully when they get in touch they can organise a plan going forward.


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## Kalraii

I would love to clean and paint the stall but while she will always have a stall it wont necessarily be the same every time!


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## Kalraii

There are also two yards, two businesses. This one they rent the stalls and arena off. Their main yard and business property is actually 15minutes away....


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## Acadianartist

Congrats on the move! So when you say the stalls are small... how small? I'm pretty picky myself, and my stalls are 10 x 12. I finished the third one recently, and it is ONLY about 9 x 10. To me, it feels TINY. But I hardly ever put a horse in there. If I do, it's just for a little while. All three of mine are happy sharing the huge double stall (10 x 24) open space so it is working for now. However, where my daughter rides, the horses have tiny stalls. Some of the barn is an old cow barn converted for horses, so the roof is really low. Like so low, a really tall person nearly has to bend over (not me, lol). I'm guessing 6.5 feet maybe... possibly 7. I feel suffocated in there, but the horses cope just fine. They're used to it, and just lower their heads. It doesn't bother them one bit. There are newer stalls in a newer portion that are larger for the bigger horses, but I'm just saying that horses can adapt. 

I would definitely get the rubber mats though. But you say she will get moved to different stalls... so not much point then. Unless they will move the mats with her, which I doubt since they weigh a ton. 

At least you'll be able to see her to monitor things from now on. And let her out lots. Though it sounds as though she will be used for hacks pretty frequently, so that should take care of her exercise needs. 

Wishing Katie lots of happiness in her new place!


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## Kalraii

@Acadianartist her current stall (all of them) are 1/3rd of her previous one. If her nose is against the wall then her bottom would have about 60cm spare to move back. If I am leaning against the wall and not a corner and she turns her bottom is pretty close to brushing against me. I do notice that the staff like to only half cover the stall in straw, leaving the door and that side bare concrete. I was thinking about the mat dilemma and tonight just decided to grab a few more sections of straw and fill up the entire stable with some extra by the door for padding. I might request that they fill her _entire_ stall with straw up to her knees haha so it'll pad down as I can't buy rubber matting for all of them. I am happy to compensate the extra usage. Sounds ok? The nice thing is on the evenings she stabled I will be there to add more. I wish in a perfect world I could have a huge stall, rubber matting and a thick layer of shavings with a bed of straw... in my dreams! 



When I drove up this evening she had her head out in the torrential rain, along with the other horses on that row. Hello? _Torrential_ rain... But NO weaving. Zero. Just chill. It must be really nice to be able to see around and even watch the pedestrians and cars through the fence on the other side of the car park. I noticed yday and today she really wasn't keen on their hay and tonight I chucked in some haylage and it was like heaven for her so will ask if they can switch her. She was on haylage before I got her but old yard didn't have it as an option. 



I went into the tack room and my heart sank. Her saddle was piled under 5 others and her expensive saddle cloth/half pad added to the generic pile. Her rugs were mixed in with the other 50 or so there on the racks.They did warn me during my initial query that if I chose them I would need a second saddle as they are constantly moving the horses between yards and with a single tack room (very limited space here) that her tack will essentially get trashed. That rugs will get swapped as the move between the two yards. I was warned in all fairness but it's still a bit hard to accept that if I want anything to be exclusive it's gonna have to live in my car or house. I do need to remind them that her saddle is fit for a half pad though and that is non-negotiable. But I can live with this. It's more important to me that she has lots of turnout, great hacking and I can check on her daily. Just yday one of their horses was slightly off and they called out the farrier as suspected an abcess and who came a few hours later so that was good to know that they don't mess around. Like all the important things that should be present are and the rest are just superficial wants.



Anyway I fished out one of her turnout rugs as I really wanted to walk her despite the torrential rain. The yard was busy! And it's weird meeting other owners and everyone is so friendly. Everyone is more laid back here, I already knew that. It was dark and raining and the large arena was bathed in the orange glow of the floodlights. It was actually realllllllllly nice. She was a good girl! We worked on leading, turning both into and away from me. Backing up. Giving each leg and yielding her quarters. She spooked a few times as she is not used to seeing ambulances and police cars fly by every 15mins (this area typical baha). After about 20minutes walking around and investigating new places we went back to her stall. I groomed her, checked her feet. Then I sat in the corner of her stall on fresh straw and just hung out with her. She really doesn't like banana. Eventually I had to leave and the moment I did she stuck her head out and banged on the door for me to come back :< It was nice that my company was appreciated! Hopefully it helps settle her in, having a familiar face.


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## Kalraii

*First Hack*

I've been able to see Katie every single day - sometimes twice and one day three times! It is incredibly soothing for my soul.


*First Hack*



Yesterday I sucked up my nerves and agreed to hack out with my friend on her share pony (the 31 yo old boy that I just <3). The staff have been gently exercising her every day since her arrival but not only would this be my first ride since her move, but my first ride in probably over two months full stop! The vet gave the all clear to do some light trotting on straights only. When I got the tack out Katie was like "oh noooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" But like a good girl she bridled herself . The arena had a lesson on but it's the only place with a mounting block and for some reason it was turned the wrong way around! I went on to mount her and it was a close one I tell you. Wayyy too far away from me. I'm glad for a good saddle fit and a patient horse. But to be honest there was a time she was so nervous she couldn't stand still so I think this is huge for both of us, even though I've made a promise to work on this now.

My friend was a little slow tacking up so I rode Katie to the yard exit and down the driveway towards the road. She was napping a little but nothing unexpected as she was alone. I urged her forward with some reassuring words and she began walking which was a really good sign. Finally when my friend arrived she was a lot happier and she took the lead. The trail entrance is literally a 30 second road-walk away. Katie hasn't been on this trail yet so very exciting! Thing is the little dales pony wasn't so speedy and Katie was starting to feel really good. So we took the lead. She POWERED on, ears forward, eager to go and brave. She had three mini spooks and the first two she marched up and sniffed immediately after: a tractor tyre, a bin and a washing machine that someone had dumped on the trail... She really didn't like the washing machine (so random?). And instead of forcing the issue I just let the old pro dales show her the way as he's the very definition of bombproof. On the way back home though she took the lead, had a good sniff and gave no cares. I think if I were alone I would have had a lot of trouble getting her past it, actually... There is literally nowhere on this trail that I can mount with the help of anything. Though I would choose to dismount and walk her through it anyway even if I couldn't get back on. Well, I probably could get back on but I'd need _serious _incentive haha.

So there I am in the lead with a horse thats very eager to go. What was really heartwarming for me was I worked hard to keep consistent contact and she began to actually reach out for it until it was pretty "snug". She wasn't leaning or heavy. She wasn't giraffing. <3 Ears are forward and flicking back constantly. My friend shouts that if I wanna trot I can as the old boy was also now feeling his beans. A little squeeze was all she needed and off we went. With her huge rocket-launching trot, she kept pace and not once did she give any inclination that she wanted to canter or run away. I felt SO safe.

Later on I was trying to get a video but my friend took the lead and said "right, I'm going for a canter!" So I caught this picture instead before getting ready for what I thought would be a bolt haha.










I had reins in one hand, phone in the other and was like nooooo... but off she went >.< But you know, as I pocketed my phone Katie just waited for me. She didn't try rush off or run. And when I asked for trot, she kept it, instead of trying to canter off. That was cool. 



On the way back we went past a school for disabled children. There were kids and adults in the playground - only about a dozen. I turned Katie to the fence and they came over for a petting! So a very good ride! However, I dismounted in the driveway to open the gate. Katie was rushing a little to get back to her stall. She was completely fine up until that point so at least I can work on that before it gets worse. 



Urban trails better than no trail! And obviously Katie has to enjoy her time out too!


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## Kalraii

*The Share Pony*

So my friend has a second share pony. A small cob. I made a thread over a month ago about her very thrushy feet and mites. Short'n'sweet was I was told to keep my nose out of it and my friend agreed to stay a share as long as her issues were dealt with. I've only seen my friend ride this pony once under the yard-"manager" (for lack of a better term). It did not look a fun ride. Bearing in mind when I asked about the share the beginning of this year I was told that this cob could walk-trot-canter although a little green and occasionally obstinate but not unsafe. I observed everything from grooming to riding. It left a sour taste in my mouth :< 

Her feet are driving her insane. INSANE. To the point she is trying to stomp all feet. She paws the ground but she's actually trying to itch her heels - you can tell by her expression and the way she holds herself/paws. In fact, she is so creative that she will put her heel on the bottom fence rail to itch her pasterns. And this rail means she's lifting her leg literally parallel with the floor. I've never seen that before! And she will constantly alternate. Her frogs look trashed. Understandably she hates her feet being messed with and friend struggles to pick her feet. Her left fore has a massive hole in the frog (where the line usually is). I had to pick that foot as she really resisted. I then gave her foot a rub where the nasty mites were living. Now, it's pretty obvious no progress in her treatment has been made. I then learned that the yard manager told my friend: "*there is no point treating the mites, they are just common in the breed.*" The owners take this womans words as the last. She said that the pony needs to be fed at 4.20pm and owners made sure to be very specific at that time. Not 4.30pm. But 4.20pm. Turns out the yard manager just said that was usually the time she got there.. but the owners thought there must be a reason for such a specific time and wanted it enforced without even knowing why... anyway I'm already baffled. I wouldn't be happy riding a horse who is so distracted and in pain with her sore feet but I managed to keep my mouth shut.

So tacked up and into the arena we go. I wasn't there to teach. I was only there to watch her ride solo for safety. But my friend could not steer this little pony. Three times pony came up to me and headbutted me and shoved her should to knock me over. I mean it, she had the whole arena but she shoved her body into mine and when I tried to move her she shoved me harder. My friend was gritting her teeth trying to steer her off me. The third time this mare dared to approach me like this I told my friend to hold on and gave her a sharp slap on her belly and flapped her away. She didn't react but did move away giving me the sad eye. I know Katie would have fled if I did that but this mare gave zero hoots. Finally the ride began properly. For what it's worth I really like this pony. In the right hands she would be so much fun as she is really smart. But she's overweight, hasn't got great feet and has a breathing problem I learned. She's also very dominant and used to getting her own way and scaring people with her antics (past riders haven't been happy with her). 


After a warmup on both reins my friend said that shes gonna try trot her. She squeezed, she shouted "TERRRROT!" and clucked nonstop. The yard manager said that she was never allowed to take her feet and heels off the mare. So my poor friend couldn't get a good squeeze in. The mare continued to walk, not even moving an ear back. I asked her why she wasn't using the stick in her hand: "coz she's scared of it". What I watched was five minutes of her trying to get this mare to trot and continously giving up as she was so tired from squeezing. She looked at me in despair. I then instructed her to squeeze and follow up with a small tap behind her heel. I learned then that they pony was used to only being smacked on the shoulder or rump. But lo and behold after a small tap behind her heel pony went immediately into a lovely working trot. 

I say lovely. I instantly noticed something. Something I never would have spotted if it wasn't for this forum. This pony was landing toe first. I actually could see it right before my eyes. The mare was constantly head tossing and clearly not happy. But then I made sure my friend let her rest and rewarded her for her efforts. I even went over and gave her a pet and she finally gave me a kind eye. We changed reins. She doesn't like going left. Friend asked for trot again, in a gentle manner, and pony all but exploded. She ran off into the other side of the arena, into the RDA lesson, beelining the gate, broncing all the while. My friend sat it great and walked her back over. I was just there itching my head. Friend suddenly needed to use the loo and got off. When she got back I asked her to get back on. I felt there really wasn't much we could do. Her feet were sore and who knew how much that was contributing to her behaviour... But I wanted to end the lesson on a good note so made her do a trot on the right rein. My friend was nervous and I actually think that this pony has scared a lot of riders out of disciplining her while also lacking the ability to reassure her. My friend said that lessons with the yard manager have been boring and she thinks its because the YM knows that if they push pony too much she will play up. 

Anyway I just told friend that it IS a good prospect pony, but not for her and not for me. She really wants a horse she can safely walk-trot-canter and have fun on! We have begun to try find a new share for her.


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## Acadianartist

Yay, so glad you got a good hack at the new place! Also, GREEN GRASS!!! I am so envious. 

We have been under a few inches of snow for about a month now. Way too early. 

Good on you for continuing to help your horsey friend. I would definitely stay away from this poor poney though.


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## Elaine8500P

Aren't horse mites easily spread to other horses?


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## Kalraii

@Elaine8500P yes but unfortunately the yard has a load of cobs and the lady that offers the livery service basically holds the opinion that it is just "normal". I get the feeling that she's been in that environment for decades so what's considered normal here isn't elsewhere. I don't even think they realise it's basically mange, and the word alone usually makes people grimace when talking about other animals... Fortunately my own horse is on the other section of the yard run by a different business and they don't mix in any way.


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## Kalraii

Katie was feeling a little depressed last week from the lack of turn out. I did ask if she could go out for longer or go into the big field but the yard owner said that she didn't feel Katie was ready yet. But then she also noticed what I meant by Katie being down and agreed. The three days of 24/7 turnout have been amazing for her! She's back at the yard now and she is so much happier already. I think having a few days to run rampant and make friends will do her a world of good. We are still trying to figure out a routine for her.



As for her soundness. Still trotting only. I've done a lot of watching her at rest and still think she has weak hinds. She was a bit reactionary last week to me touching her belly but thought it would be good to let her settle in before trying to treat potential ulcers considering the wormer and diet change. Much better now - no reaction at all. I am starting to wonder if she has a locking stifle on the left as she sometimes yanks it up when being picked out and it's the one that sometimes drags although you have to spend a lot of time with her to notice. I will bring it up to the vet. 



Speaking of ridden... a few times now I've ridden her alone at night in the arena. I have to say - it's so much easier for me to manage my anxiety when I am alone. I used to HATE mounting - hate hate hate it. I would feel sick to my stomach thinking about it. But every night she's been at the yard I've made it my aim to get on even just for 5mins to get through the mounting anxiety I have. It's practically gone... she definitely tried to evade me the first few times. Bum out, walking back but I gently persisted and once on I would give her a treat. Tonight she stood perfectly still. Still walks off when my butt hits the saddle but at least it's not before. She was VERY eager to move out tonight, really power walking and as long as she stops after a circle I'm happy. I will eventually get to a point where I will try mount off different things in prep for the hack dismounts haha. The rides only last 15mins and I reward her for her good behaviour by getting off (and for putting up with me haha!), untacking IN the arena (we are totally alone at 8pm at night) and letting her just free-roam and sniff around. She 100% knows the difference betweeen playtime and work. It has become a regular thing that after about 20minutes of she and I just walking around the arena "talking" she will have a snooze with me "guarding" her. After a 10min nap we'll head back home to her stall. I've been told by a few people that I am OTT for coming so late (including the owner of the premises) but I just love it so much >.<


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## egrogan

Kalraii said:


> I have to say - it's so much easier for me to manage my anxiety when I am alone. I used to HATE mounting - hate hate hate it. I would feel sick to my stomach thinking about it. But every night she's been at the yard I've made it my aim to get on even just for 5mins to get through the mounting anxiety I have. It's practically gone...



I can completely relate to this. I don't know if it's performance anxiety or disliking the generally nosiness of other boarders watching and comparing themselves to everyone else or what. But I always preferred to be alone to work through a tricky problem (for me it was getting comfortable riding my newer mare's canter, which is much bigger than my other horse's and feels like a catapult). And also feeling like if things went off the rails a little, I wouldn't have to worry about handling it while there were other people using arena space. I think for me it seems to be something about just feeling like I can mess up, take all the time I need, stop and grit my teeth in frustration until I'm mentally re-centered, and then try again without getting in anyone else's way.


Good luck getting Katie's routine sorted.


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## Acadianartist

Yup, same here, I find it much more relaxing to ride without spectators, or a coach looking on. I appreciate lessons, don't get me wrong. They are great to push me to another level. However, the quiet rides by myself or even with my daughter -- who thankfully, NEVER points out my numerous flaws -- are the most relaxing. 

Also glad to hear Katie is getting a little more turnout. I honestly feel my horses are much happier with full turnout. Even though our pastures are covered in snow, they are still open for the horses to go out and stretch their legs. I will keep it that way until there is just too much snow to get around. 

So glad you are spending more time with Katie! Having her close to home is going to be so nice for you both.


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## Kalraii

I have been lurking but so busy that I've been unable to reply to anything! @egrogan glad you feel the same! I always felt actually too much pressure - people mistaking my hesitation for fear when really I just like a little more time to process and prepare. @Acadianartist in the same vein I get really ticked off with instructors that are yelling at you to canter non-stop. Sometimes I just need a breather to reset my poor mind and some forget that I just can't react as fast as them >.<



So the last two days have been pretty amazzzzzzzzzzzzing. I say days ... I've been going in the evenings still. It's constantly raining and I am the ONLY person at the yard at this time of night, not including the resident foxes. I ordered a rope halter bridle thingy and spent about 15 minutes trying to figure it out haha. Finally got it! Tacked up and went for my first solo bitless ride. And by bitless - I mean no action. Zero. Literally just a sidepull halter. I wasn't anxious in the slightest about anything. It just felt like the right time. As for mounting she does try a little bum out but second time round she stands like a treat. No flapping or fluster just a patient "try again" and she's perfect! I only rode for about 15mins. A few trots on the straight. She was even offering to canter she was feeling so good. And everytime I asked for a verbal halt she stopped perfect! As usual I got off, untacked her and let her have a run around the arena for free and did some groundwork/treat tricks. Then her signature snooze before going back to her stall.



Well tonight it gets even better. I don't know what came over me. It was absolutely p*ssing it down with rain but I put on my helmet, put her in a turnout rug and went to the arena. Put on her new bitless bridle and ... GOT ON. Bareback, if the rug doesn't count. I don't plan on making a habit of it when rugged ofc but it was just a whim. I've not ridden bareback since a kid. I did take my time, leaning on her and lifting a leg to see how she would react. She was a bit confused at first but when she finally understood I wanted to get on she stood very still and voila! My first reaction: OUCH! SHARK WITHER IN MY HOOHAH! I shuffled back to the correct place and had to tense my butt cheeks as I soon realised she's got quite a prominent spine haha. Fortunately I've always had very strong thigh muscles and a butt - putting it bluntly, I have _just enough_ room for both of us to not be uncomfortable haha. Phew. So asked her to walk on. Oh my god it's like riding a whale. She suddenly seems twice as wide than when saddled. But I'm praising the heck out of her and she was surprisingly VERY relaxed, not bothered at all by the unique first time situation. Seriously, at the old yard she apparently tried to buck the staff off when they tried. But she was totally chill about it tonight and I gave her an apple while mounted as a big fat thank you. We walked the length of the arena and when I asked her to halt she did and I got off. That was that! Made a HUGE fuss of her and even gave her some chaff as a special treat. I did have a very wet crotch though for the rest of the evening as the rug was already well rained on when I did get on :< 



I really need to take lessons on some other schooled horses though as I've lost my balance in the time she's not been fully sound and she is really hard to sit for me. I would like to be able to ride her bareback but mostly to compare her range of movement. She's so choppy and I wonder if the saddle fit, which has to be done in such a way due to her wither wastage, is impeding her. There is quite a dip that she already had when bought and literally even if you place the saddle with full shoulder clearance she wont have it entirely due to the groove at her wither, even with the saddle being fitted anatomically and with a half-pad. I'm gonna have to teach myself to drive her as well. Even with a horse and amazing staff, schedules just don't line up in order to learn certain things. Time to just crack on. I can't keep waiting or begging people to teach me. Seems like I just gotta do it myself and post here for feedback!


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## Kalraii

Now imagine me on her!


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## Acadianartist

Yay!!! I'm so happy for you both. It seems like you have grown to know each other well enough to trust each other. That is such a huge step. Good for you AND Katie! Just keep at it. Follow your gut. There comes a time when you just need to figure out what works for you both. I'm all for coaching, but these moments that are just between you, when you just go with it, are so precious. They're what you will remember. 

Keep it up!


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## tinyliny

that's a lake! is it mud or sand under the inch of standing water?


my lease horse is fat, and at a glance one would think, "oh, he'll be a pillow to ride bareback", but no, his spine is proterberant from his back, and withers are bony. Just a huge belly under all that!


Did riding ON the rug feel slippery? I'm wondering how that rug would function if she started moving all squirrely. Would is slide under you, and off you'd go? I've never been a good bareback rider. Horse must have a lot of mane to hang onto!


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## Kalraii

I've been totally out of it. Something bad happened and I was so stressed that I lost a third of my hair - literally coming out in clumps. Just stress. I don't really want to go into detail about the incident/situation as am not ready yet to even think about it much less try to explain to anyone >.< Reading this forum on a daily basis has helped a lot but I've not had the energy or ability to comment until today. Last month I didn't do much with Katie even though I was off work but she was well cared for by the staff and had plenty of turn out with her friends and bales of hay. I checked up on her regularly but did not ride.



This month things improved. In fact this week is probably favourite week in what _feels_ forever... The weather is amazing around 16ish celcius (60 fahrenheit according to google). Weather is just so strange these days... I am dreading summer if spring is already like this. 



Everything is coming together horse-wise though. The yard owner and I confirmed that Katie will stay in full livery and NOT go into working livery. Because she runs an RDA _riding school_ she doesn't have much space or time to take on full livery (full care boarders) like me. BUT because Katie and I are so easy going and she's such a well behaved horse she's happy to continue like this. Which is so perfect. Their working livery is like two lessons/trail rides a day a few days a week with massive turnout for a few days. So I was not worried about her being over worked or bored anyway. But knowing she's exclusively mine makes me so happy. The staff will ride her if I can't and I said I'm happy for them to take her along on a hack. They are very tight on insurance and since she's not added to their riding school certificate I don't have to worry about them putting randoms on her. Heck, I had to prove I* had insurance to board with them. I do like their standards that's for sure. With all the horse flu going around they also ensured everyone had mandatory vaccinations on the yard. 



Because of aforementioned incident I've not had a vet out for Katie although I am arranging one later next month after a period of planned exercise and conditioning that we should have begun last month -.- but.. life. She is OK though and I constantly asked staff to bring up any concerns they may have. Many experienced people on the yard have said the same thing: she has a weak hind end and we need to work on it. What is amazing is that things are starting to click. You know that "eye" I've been trying to develop? Well for the first time in my life I can actually see what people are talking about when it comes to her. I've been working hard at studying videos and horses around me. I do always get one of the staff members to check her before I take her out in case I miss something obvious but I am starting to even be able to feel differences under saddle. When she's stiff, when her right hind is dragging more. Some days she snatches her right hind up as if it's sticky and other days or after a ride out she will be just fine. I've been doing easy stretches (just normal ROM coz I'm no physio) after riding too and rubbing down her joints. 



In one week of regular riding she's already tripping less (none today!) and seems so much more supple. And don't get me started on forward. She is now begging to _run_. I believe she is in heat as well or coming to(?) as she's showing signs like she was last year- she gets super duper sensitive around her bottom and is a LOT more sensitive/sharp to ride. Honestly I'm not good at telling but I can tell that something's changed and what else could it be at this time of year, heh? 



So as for the riding. Well mounting is a dream now. I can't believe how nervous I was about it... I have a set approach that I have. I press my hand down onto the saddle and pull on the stirrup before putting my foot in it to see how she reacts. Then I grab mane and then I mount when I'm confident shes ready. She does still try walk off (increasingly less) but it's no longer a big deal and second time round is guaranteed perfect. I can mount her from anywhere and anything now as well. 



We have mostly only done hacks. With each day she's becoming more forward, more sharp and absolutely wants to bomb it. The other day we went on a longer hack to the national park and she had a few spooks and she began to trot/jig. *And would not stop. *We are talking down a london shopping highstreet Sunday lunch time (to get to the park entrance). So many people, traffic, noise... BUSES. SCARY WHITE VANS. Twice I had to basically turn her into someones driveway to bring her back to me. I am pretty good at sitting her trot now, transitioning up only, I'll defo pat my back on that. However, I'm too good at it sometimes as me sitting nicely was encouraging her to want to canter!!!! But trying to pace her jackhammer trot even in rising is hard. She can just trot away. I remember my heart coming up into my throat and literally thought back to all the instruction I was given at the old yard. I took a deep breath and forced myself to relax. Clinging onto her mouth wasn't working anyway. I felt bad for having to be hard handed but it was a last ditch attempt believe me. I managed to get her to slow down enough that was safe to circle on tarmac WHILE SIGNALLING TO THE BUS BEHIND ME AND THE TRAFFIC IN FRONT TO STOP!!! I pulled into a side road and took a few minutes to bring her back to me. I know for fact I scared her a little by my reaction but I figured out fast what I had to do to keep her under control. If this was a year ago, guys, this would have resulted in a meltdown and an accident I'm sure!



We got to the big open field. Cyclists, families, prams, scooters, people paying football, dogs, flying kites, having picnics. I wasn't worried about any of that. I was worried about the big open space and her pricked ears haha. But a leap of faith I asked her to ONLY trot and we had a nice long trot and she behaved impeccably. When she stopped I let her graze as a reward. She did plenty of snorting and decompressing. I wasn't ready to canter in such a big space nor is she ready enough yet and I was very happy how she stuck to the plan. On the way home it was uneventful and she was 100x more relaxed and I gave her a slightly longer rein as she began to go low.


The last few hacks in company have also been really good. She really wants to trot non-stop and canter though. She reaaaaalllllllllly wants to let loose. Sometimes she decides she wants to trot. I bring her back to a walk and halt and then I will let her trot again on my terms. I have had to circle back a few times to remind her that trotting there will result in more work. Work?! She's having the time of her life. Honestly had some great trots where I'm laughing and having to duck branches. I legit think she could do a running trot the way she goes! So we have reached a nice compromise. She will stop (mostly) and I will let her have her "runs". Each time is better. I find I am naturally riding in a forward half seat in order to keep up with her speed. I need to get that critiqued. I find it is just naturally occuring and makes transitions much easier for me when out on the trail. I have recently begun working on doing different speeds in trot as well to learn better control- nice and slow vs ground eater. 



We hack past a school around lunch time and imagine a few hundred kids screaming at the tops of their voices and running like napolean's army to the fence? Doesn't bother her. A pigeon just fell out of a bush coz it's so fat? OMG! Smol spook. A carrier bag hanging off a tree? Must investigate. Sticks her face in and rattles the cans inside. I always let her investigate things when she asks; I want her to know her opinion matters too and enjoy her exploring. Some weird fencing on the ground? Not sure about that. I make her sniff it and pat her. There is this ONE RUBBISH BIN she doesn't like. I give her the benefit of doubt first time when she tells me shes worried. I let her investigate. I reward. After that I expect her to walk past it nicely. I don't "play into it" after that first time as I've learned from watching some around me and this forum that they CAN be smart enough to milk you 



So we're making progress. Generally speaking she is bombproof - like really good. But she's also no push button and is so forward and sharp of recent. I need to go over leg yields again as she takes every nudge as a trot cue. But in the same vein I can also trot her on the trail on the buckle. It just depends how she feels in that _exact moment_. 



I just worry about doing things wrong or not being safe. But I also know that if I don't get out we can't really improve on these things. I do trust her. She's a good girl. I know she trusts me but she has a lot of energy and I need to fast become a better rider to harness it safely! 



Will try take some videos when out tomorrow!


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## egrogan

Good to have you back, and nice to hear that you're getting some good rides in.


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## knightrider

Yay! Hooray! You're back! I've missed you.


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## tinyliny

you do all that ALONE? I would not want to be riding on a road with all that scary and dangerous stuff without a companion. my hat's off to you.


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## Kalraii

tinyliny said:


> you do all that ALONE? I would not want to be riding on a road with all that scary and dangerous stuff without a companion. my hat's off to you.



At old yard she wasn't this spooky! TY for the compliment. Honestly I wasn't sure I could handle it but I was determined to try. She never exploded nor felt like she would but the jigging was really unnerving at first. But I'm getting more used and relaxed about it. But I bear in mind that I haven't done much with her this month, she has tons of energy and is very likely in heat. Heh. Well tomorrow I have a ride in company again which is nice. On Sunday a big one to Bushy but this time with friends. But I have made up my mind that we're gonna explore company or no!


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## Acadianartist

So good to hear from you again! Sorry you've been going through stuff. I wondered where you went all this time. We worry you know 

16C? Whaaaaa? It's the Arctic here. -31C windchill tonight, and we just got a bunch more snow yesterday. The path to the barn was cleared last night and got blown in again today so it's knee-deep in snow I go. Everyone is so sick of this awful winter. It just never lets up - there's always something making it miserable outside. 

It sounds like you're getting a lot more confident on Katie! I'm impressed! I cannot even imagine riding with all that going on around you! But I'm guessing that the more you get Katie out, the better it will get. It sounds like a bit of spring fever on her part. I wish my horses had spring fever. I'm pretty sure they're just as tired of this horrible winter as I am. 

Welcome back! I look forward to hearing more Katie stories!


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## NavigatorsMom

Just got caught up on your journal - I love your story and way of writing  Katie is such a cutie and I enjoy reading about your progress together! I'm sorry you've been going through some hard things lately, hope it gets better soon.


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## Kalraii

FINALLY a day I can just sit down and do nothing. I love nothing days they help me recharge. I've been way too busy renovating house, work and animals. Speaking of animals I've had to put down 5 pets this month alone. 4 of them were elderly the other had a mouth abscess that just wasn't resolving. I have an elderly degu that in her 11 years has never had issues. She's stopped eating with no obvious signs in her mouth where most degus issues are, just like rabbits. I feel her time has come as she is a very nervous lady and being prodded and poked would probably finish her off anyway. I haven't been accepting any more rescues as I simply don't have time or energy but I feel SO guilty for turning them away. 

As for Katie-poo-poo pants it's been going hmmm. I don't know what to think. In the arena she's perfect. I could probably ride her confidently without any tack I reckon tho she's so uncomfortable bareback I don't do it much heh. Which is a shame I'd really like to be able to get used to her movements and getting her to stretch out without any saddle but it doesn't look like that'll be happening anytime soon.

On Friday I went to her huge field to put sun cream on her face. It ended up turning into 2 hours of grooming. I can manage the herd realllllly well now haha and that's important as there is no secure area where I can take her. I just have to do it with the herd watching. I spend the first 5mins just chasing horses off (must look so weird to random walkers) and I feel horrible but I purposefully make sure they know not to come too close or interfere with me when I'm with Katie coz she gets ticked off as well and I just want to be safe. Afterwards I go around petting each member of the herd and giving them a carrot and it's done with zero pushiness or fighting because if anyone starts anything they'll _get it_! They are all very friendly and respectful now and no longer even try pushing into our space, even the young gelding that once turned his bum on me. It's quite cool to randomly be in a field, no rope, brushing and fly bathing her. We got a lot of walkers come and say hello. 

------------------------------------------------
*
The hack and invisible barriers*

Yesterday I took her for a 2 hour HANDWALK and we did a lot of ground work. She's soooo good at backing up now just verbally and now can go on for ages at good speed and with willingness. Before she could do one or two steps and resisted a lot. I really want to point out it was never done as punishment and just as fun. Under saddle I just apply a tiny bit of rein and say "back up" and she does so softly and JUST as perfect ^,^ We are now working on backing up and steering coz I wanna be able to pole weave backwards at a walk. Again, just for fun! We came across many scary objects all of which we conquered with great ease. But there is one area where a lone stallion used to live, owned by a certain community and reported to the RSPCA by many people. The stallion isn't there now but he never looked like it was starving and had shelter/fresh water etc although terrible feet. They used to eat grass together either side of the fence, a good distance still, and I think it was the only horse company he ever got coz he loved it. I wonder where he's gone :< She was VERY anxious there and was telling me she wanted to run away so I hope nothing bad. We watched the trains on the hidden tracks down the trail which she was up in arms about, too. I reckon if I was riding her at those two combined moments I'd have had work to do. 

She's just a lot more confident with me on the ground. Because after that hand walk I got on her and took her out for a hack. Now we've hacked down that trail many times so I wanted to do something NEW. I wanted to explore different roads to train confidence in us both for future solo exploration. The roads were dead with Easter and all which was great. It started off good. She's really not a lover of buses but two passed us and while she got a little jiggery she handled it very well. It wasn't a big deal. We turn down a quiet road and BAM invisible wall. _I've never had her nap like this before._ So that was interesting. She would backup very fast and try to spin to go home. I expected to get all stressed myself since our last bolt but I was surprising relaxed. I reminded myself to stay soft and ask her to circle - the resident road was totally dead and we were in good view of any on-comers. The circle was too small and making her feel trapped so I made it bigger and she was then happy to do what must have been 10+ circles before she was willing to stop and relax. 

ATTEMPT 2: INVISIBLE WALL so now that she had calmed down I asked her to go forward again to the same spot. NOPE same deal. I circle her again, just anything to stop her walking backwards into cars lol and to direct her energy. ATTEMPT 3: "oh fine then." She goes forward, a little tense, but we pass the invisible barrier, the bright yellow car and bus stop. There were only 2 idiot and inconsiderate drivers, one that was so close to our bum as to nearly be nudging us over with the bonnet of her car. The other was someone who got in his car _right next to us_ honked and slammed on accelerator - he narrowly missed getting t-boned himself. Katie and I are unimpressed. We go down some more new roads and I start to realise I probably shouldn't be on private residential roads. And she poops. Crap let's get outta here (it's ok I went back and got it). We met a few more invisible barriers and worked on them and each time I found myself relaxing more. And I mean relax, not get complacent. I wasn't nearly as bothered by her antics/anxiety as I had been in the past. It actually wasn't that scary to deal with but I know that if this was last year I'd probably have been panicking. She was so prancy that getting off wasn't even a safe option >.< 

The good ending: so on the way back to celebrate our victories I took her down the trail. My god, we had 3 spooks only a minute apart. But she did the freeze'n'drop spook not the "spin'n'run" and I'm sure her belly touched the ground for one of them. Knowing we've done this trail SO many times by now, including an hour earlier, I was a bit annoyed by the 3rd spook over a bird flapping and I loudly told her to "GET ON!" in an annoyed tone with a little kick. Well that did the trick, she seemed to get her crap together. The Katie I know returned. We did some trotting and some hill work. No canter because honestly after the spooks I* wasn't feeling 100% and I didn't want to set us up badly. I really didn't wanna be galloping down the trail with so many holiday walkers plus it's an arrestable offence (and yeah, I know quite a few people who have been ticketed and arrested for not managing their mount correctly).

Invisible barrier: WHAT?! She was napping coz _she didn't want to go home._ For real I tried to take her home and she began backing up (ps I have a loose rein when she does this so it's all off her own back). By this time she was enjoying herself out on the trail and I was laughing so much and must have looked like a mental person. We had a little more fun in that section and then I took her home with more insistence and she obeyed. But the closer we got to the yard the more she dragged her feet. I guess that by the time the trail ride ended she was actually happy to be out. 


--------------------------------------

So I don't know what to think. At old yard I could hack her out and she was 100x more confident but I know for FACT that the yard staff there hacked her alone as the manager preferred training rides on her own. There was only 1 route available too for me. I also know that staff at this new yard greatly dislike riding alone (understandably) and that the only solo hacks she's had, I think, have been with me. Because that's just how it feels? Obviously regarding confidence, or lack of, we feed off each other. I want us to be able to go new places confidently and I guess the only way to improve that is by going new places lol. So square one it is! Short hacks while sticking to trails and roads local and taking a random route every time. I noticed I need to work more on my direction. Sometimes I just expect her to go forward and know where to go but I actually need to actively drive her, so to speak, at least until she understands a bit more I guess. She really is a great horse, the more I think about it. I wouldn't say we were true green on green like some insane people I know but we were certainly tinted as such. Between us we have enough of everything to get by and enough ingredients to use and improve. She has without a doubt made me a better horse person and everyone tells me how great she is but she's always been great, I can't take credit for that haha. Basic care aside I think the real thing I've given her is brain food. She loves learning new things and loves showing off. 

But I'm still a terrible rider. My god. And I dont mean terrible in the "oh no I'm not grand prix level" I mean like... terrible. I am quiet and balanced enough but "enough" aint gonna cut it. I spend so much time working on Katie that I totally forget about my own skills. I really need to get in the arena a couple times a week and properly work MYSELF. So if there's one thing I'm determined to do is keep a library of my own riding improvement hehe. I have a headcam as well and it got some neat footage but I'd set it too high. Turns out I don't look down nearly as much as I thought! Next ride


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## Kalraii

Ok I need to be more disciplined with my journal - it helps keep me in check and focused for the work I need to do with Katie. ^>^ 

So... at this point she's had about 5 weeks off (1 week in between with a ride or two). She is being treated for mites and had to have her back shoes stay off since she twisted them and ruined the hoof wall before her holiday. There was, and still is, very little for them to attach to! It's ridiculous! I never had this issue before. Anyway farrier earliest can come Monday and vet is again coming Tuesday. Meanwhile I've been bored and so has she so I've been doing only a little amount of work to keep her moving and interested. 

On Wednesday evening I just gave her a bath and did some groundwork in the grazing paddock. She was very eager to to recap her mad skillz and prove she's still a clever girl! We even free schooled lunged and honestly its hilarious watching other people try lunge her. Because out in the paddock without a line I don't even need to be loud or excessive. I just say "walk" "trot" and "canter" and she does it... in both directions. She gets to pick her own circle diameter because no line and its not as big as I'd have thought she'd want. It's also funny as she tries to anticipate me so trying to keep her on her toes. We only do this for 5mins which is why I think she's so willing. It's not endless circles and more about communication. I love inviting her to turn into me and then asking her to back up then change direction. It's really fluid now and I don't really have to do very much. She just knows now. 

Thursday I took her for a hand-walk in the day. Gotta be careful with her feet so we just went up the road then stayed by some grassy bits. Got used again to traffic and buses. In the evening I rode her 10 minutes but more to see where we were at. I don't know what's come over me but I feel very secure and confident. Remember how mounting used to be a bit iffy? Well I got on her without even thinking for the first time in my life. I literally just lined her up and got on. The arena has a den of foxes on the other side of the fence and she will spook at people walking the other side of it as well. So a few spooks but that came as no surprise as she hadn't been in the arena for so long. I just sat them, ignored them and continued. By the end she'd gotten over herself. As a reward she got to gallop like a fruitcake in the paddock again and have a dust bath. 

Friday took for a bigger hand-walk in the daytime. Stuck to the grassy bits. The reason I'm walking her so much is that she has ZERO turnout at the yard currently as her horsey friends are still on holiday. They have no one to turn her out with but its only for this week. No worries, I'm getting her out and about. In the evening we went back to the paddock for her evening supervised turnout which usually involves 5 minutes of her galloping and us playing tag. Then once she's calmer we do some fun games and ground work. Then it's about 20-30mins of us chilling out, me reading a book while she grazes. 

Today, Saturday, I brought one of my dogs along. The others I don't trust so much hands-free and when I'm walking with Katie I like to obviously not be juggling too much. So Honey (picture in following post) came along. They love each other. Licking faces and Katie nuzzles her fur. We spent an hour out on the trail. It was getting hot for the dog. When I put Katie away she instantly went for a snooze. I rode her again this evening and she was very willing! I got on again without a fuss. It's a very strange feeling just lining her up and getting on. Usually I'm a bit tentative about the process... maybe something has just clicked. I practised some sitting trot and we did a few serpentines. She wanted to canter but with her feet as they are I didn't let her. Worried about her pulling something back there, since her fronts are due and her hinds are worn down. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



My goal for September is to be able to hack her out 20 minutes and for the majority of the hack to have her relaxed at walk and trot.

*Week 1:*

mon - turned out
tues - turned out
weds - turned out 
thurs - evening ground work + supervised turnout
fri - evening ride + supervised turnout
sat - morning hand-walk with the dogs + afternoon ride (schooling + solo hack after) + supervised turnout 
sun - afternoon hack (with foot person) + afternoon groundwork + supervised turnout 

Groundwork is really just fun and games. I have set up obstacles for her to do on foot, objects to investigate to get treats. Teaching her how weave between poles backwards etc etc.

Pictures below!


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## Kalraii

I guess I'll let the pictures do the talking. The one out in the countryside... believe it or not thats in the city still!! It's an amazing bit of greenery for their turnout and huugggeeee!!!


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## Acadianartist

Great photos. I admire your dedication! But you know, it would be too easy if there were never any invisible walls to conquer  You're doing a great job with Katie. The two of you seem like you have such an amazing bond. Just imagine where you will be years from now!


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