# My Hands are to Harsh. How do I fix this?



## CherokeeHorse (Dec 11, 2013)

Hey guys, so I'm having a small problem with my riding. I started riding 3-4 years ago and regardless of what horse I'm on I notice that my hands are to rough on the reigns. I'm not sure how to fix this so I was wondering if their are any exercises I could use to strengthen my other aids and to soften my hands. Any ideas? :-|


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## EdmontonHorseGal (Jun 2, 2013)

in my experience, a rider with harsh hands is using the reins to balance too much.

i would suggest finding an instructor that can effectively and properly give you longe line lessons. you'll learn how to balance on the horse without hanging on the reins, as the instructor will have control of the horse with the longe line and you can work on your seat without having to worry about your hands at all.


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## CherokeeHorse (Dec 11, 2013)

EdmontonHorseGal said:


> in my experience, a rider with harsh hands is using the reins to balance too much.
> 
> i would suggest finding an instructor that can effectively and properly give you longe line lessons. you'll learn how to balance on the horse without hanging on the reins, as the instructor will have control of the horse with the longe line and you can work on your seat without having to worry about your hands at all.


 
Thanks but my balance is quite good and I am never in fear of falling, so I don't think it is be because of this. My yanking on the reigns to harshly seems to be automatic and almost instinctual, I don't know how to correct this. I will admit that while my seat is alright I still find it difficult to use my legs properly.
I'm not sure where I would find a trainer who could do that with me, I could ask the lady who taught me to ride or my grandparents but other than that there aren't that many people who ride/train in my town or around it.


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## DancingArabian (Jul 15, 2011)

Are you yanking when the horse spooks? If so, that is actually a balance issue. It's also a confidence in your balance issue. Horse spooks, your body feels like you're going to fall, you automatically yank to save yourself.  A LOT of us go through this. I do myself when I don't challenge my riding. To combat this, longe line lessons can help. Also, lots of two point exercises will help your body feel better able to stick with the horse so when he jerks out from under you, your body will automatically move better with the horse and you won't yank.

If you're leaning on the reins, longe line lessons can also help. Bridging your reins will help as a hand and fix, so will riding will riding with a neck strap or martingale you can grab. This is also a balance issue. You could also flip your reins upside down if you're an English rider and hold the reins like you're driving a buggy. All temp fixes but will help.

Both of these are balance issues but not outwardly obvious as them.

Now if you're just hauling the reins around to steer too hard then that's something you're going to have to consciously correct.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Zexious (Aug 2, 2013)

Are you working with a trainer?

If so, you can do a small exercise where the trainer takes the reins (behind the bit, while you're mounted), and you can show her how hard you hold onto them. She can then tell you to lessen until it's a more appropriate amount.


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## MyBoyPuck (Mar 27, 2009)

Think shoulders and elbows. Keep both supple and giving. Most bad hands are the result of locked elbows and tight shoulders. When warming up, shrug your shoulders until you feel them fall into place without tension. For the elbows, it's more just a case of continually reminding yourself to check that you are not locking them. 

To get a better feel of what your contact with the mouth should feel like, replace the reins with bungee cords, just hooked to the bridle not attached. You will learn lightning fast. If your contact is too light, they will fall off. If it is too heavy, you will feel it on your end and have a rather angry horse. 

hope that helps.


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## Palomine (Oct 30, 2010)

I too would agree it is balance, and your body alignment may be off, several things can cause this, first you just don't know any better, and are not over yourself properly.

Saddle could be an ill fit for you, throwing you off balance and out of position.

Stirrups could be too short or too long.

But to soften hands: Take 2 cups full of hot coffee and walk around house with them, working to keep coffee from sloshing out. This helps to loosen shoulders, elbows, wrists, and hands from each other. The give and take movement will loosen your hands up, and allow you to adjust your movement.

And you need to see if you are white knuckled, if you are, then your hands are too tight on the reins period. Wrap your reins with binder twine, or braid some together and use them for reins, binder twine is rough on the hands, and will remind you to loosen your grip.

Old time method, which works nicely, is to make reins where your hands go, out of barbed wire....that gets the point across pretty fast. Pain is a good teacher.

And your hands need to be low, so if you are carrying your hands too high, that will also cause some of this.

Can you get us a photo of you just mounted, with hands at normal level for you?

And video would help greatly to see just what is going on.


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## TrailTraveler (Jan 4, 2014)

I had a problem with "busy hands," so my instructor took away my reins and made me rely on my legs to "steer" my horse. She had me lay the reins in front of the pommel, so if I felt that I needed them, I could grab them; and then we worked in the indoor arena without a longe line. By the end of a half-hour, I had figured out that my seat and legs are actually more important than my hands, and as a result, my hands are much lighter. At least, that's been my experience.


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## Foxtail Ranch (Mar 10, 2012)

a little bareback riding...


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## Sharpie (May 24, 2009)

One of my friends tied a loop of hay twine to the front of her saddle, probably 8-10 inches in diameter. I rode with that and the reins through my fingers- definitely made me aware of when my hands were moving about too much or using too much pressure. That twine is instant feedback and bites hard if you're too rough or busy, without involving the horse's mouth, which helped me immensely and pointed out clearly when I was relying on rein more than I ought to.


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## waresbear (Jun 18, 2011)

Neck strap, get someone to show you how to set up one and how to use it. In fact, someone on here will prolly explain it to you, I am lousy at typing out instructions, sorry.

ETA Sharpie has a version of it described in her post.


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## GreySorrel (Mar 5, 2012)

It would be wise to get a good competent instructor to help you so your not so harsh with the REINS. BTW, "reign" is what a kind or prince does...

Having someone who is impartial to watch where you put your hands, how you hold them, where you sit and how is really valuable as a rider. They may be able to catch something you think isn't going on, as when we ride, were not always paying attention to the more subtle things. 

Good luck.


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## Kayty (Sep 8, 2009)

A neck strap or monkey strap will be of great benefit to you. 
Even just a piece of bailing twine tied onto the saddle D-rings for you to hook your fingers into will work just fine. 
The process behind it is that you hook your pinkie fingers under the strap while you ride, and every time you try to pull on the reins it instead pulls against the strap. Saving the horse's mouth and allowing you to feel every time you pull. 

90% of the time, rough hands are a result of a lack of balance. And lack of balance doesn't mean you are scared of falling off. It can be simply a slight unevenness in the saddle, or an ineffective seat. It can also be a result of not riding a horse forward - the horse becomes heavy in the hand and you feel like you need to lug the horse around just to turn.
Also, many riders think that yanking the reins will make their horse come on the bit. 

All scenarios are incorrect for any kind of effective, kind riding. Whatever your discipline, it is preferable that the aids and balance come predominantly from the seat and the rein is the last aid used. 


I think some lessons on a lunge without reins will do you a lot of good, followed by lessons riding one handed, and then riding with a neck/monkey strap. Developing soft hands is of utmost importance - even if purely to save the horse from getting clocked in the very sensitive mouth and teeth.


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## CherokeeHorse (Dec 11, 2013)

Thank you to everyone. I appreciate all the input and once I am back to riding in the next few weeks I will attempt to keep my shoulders and elbows supple and I think I will try riding without the reins to help with balance and to teach myself how to use my legs properly.

I do not have a trainer to work with, however my grandmother could help me with this by watching and correcting me.

Also thanks for pointing out that it's "Reins" and not "Reigns" GreySorrel! I didn't even notice that! 

I will post again and tell you guys if it has gotten better, however, my horse is just getting over an injury and I may not be able to ride for a couple of weeks yet. D: Also I do not think I can post a video or a picture, sorry.


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## GotaDunQH (Feb 13, 2011)

CherokeeHorse said:


> *Thanks but my balance is quite good and I am never in fear of falling, so I don't think it is be because of this. My yanking on the reigns to harshly seems to be automatic and almost instinctual, I don't know how to correct this. I will admit that while my seat is alright I still find it difficult to use my legs properly.*
> I'm not sure where I would find a trainer who could do that with me, I could ask the lady who taught me to ride or my grandparents but other than that there aren't that many people who ride/train in my town or around it.


This right here says your balance IS lacking. If you can't use your legs properly, which as "anchors", then you have balance issues if you are unable to use them. Proper leg use is the hardest to learn, so we have all been where you are now! I suggest someone take the reins away from you and work you on a longe line. You need to learn what is called and "independent" seat and this is one of the best ways to go so. It almost forces you to learn seat and leg use, because you have been riding solely with your hands. 

Do you have a friend who can help you with this?


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## DancingArabian (Jul 15, 2011)

CherokeeHorse said:


> Thanks but my balance is quite good and I am never in fear of falling, so I don't think it is be because of this. My yanking on the reigns to harshly seems to be automatic and almost instinctual, I don't know how to correct this. I will admit that while my seat is alright I still find it difficult to use my legs properly.
> I'm not sure where I would find a trainer who could do that with me, I could ask the lady who taught me to ride or my grandparents but other than that there aren't that many people who ride/train in my town or around it.


It's not really a conscious fear of falling. It's like when you trip over something, your arms automatically move to try to catch yourself and stop you from falling. When you're riding and you 'trip' (not literally trip, figuratively) and get out of balance, your arms try to do something, anything to keep you from falling.

This is where the concept of an independent seat. An independent seat is when it doesn't matter what your horse is doing, but you will be centered and balanced and go along with him. Having an independent seat means that when you 'trip', your legs and core will automatically adjust to keep you upright, so your hands and arms won't need to do anything, then you won't yank on the reins.


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## Roux (Aug 23, 2013)

I wanted to add a trick I just learned. Take a sweat scraper (pvc pipe, crop, ruler anything works) and rest it on your forearms behind your wrist. If you are too quick with your hands the scraper will bounce right off and fall. If you are not level it will slide off to one side. You can do this at w/t/c and do it while making circles, stopping, and backing. Its a good guide to have the visual right there in font of you to show you without delay, this was too much this was too quick, harsh, etc. Hope this helps!

Also you can "re-train" your instincts during a spook. Think about what you will do during a spook when you are no where near your horse, sitting in traffic, boring class, slow at work what ever. Think about what position you would get into with your seat, and legs. And then also how you will get the horse under control ie a one rein stop. Personally visualization for me is a huge help!


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