# So here's what happened...



## Horsef (May 1, 2014)

Well, on the bright side of things, the cops in your neck of woods have nothing better to do than harass kids so there's that.

(US sounds like a strange place. Cops enforcing curfews on 15 year-olds is just...strange)


----------



## seabiscuit91 (Mar 30, 2017)

Wow that is crazy.

I'm in Aus, so we don't have 'curfews' or anything enforced by law.. I assume if an officer found kids loitering they would send them home/drive them home and tell them to ****** off, they certainly wouldn't go blasting the parents, unless their was actual crime involved..

I would be pretty peeved off to, so I don't blame you, it definitely isn't 'protocol' here so I can't speak for your laws but even so, surely entering the home of a child they found to give the parents an earful, in bed, at 3am is just over the top. If there was reason to be concerned, nothing stopping them from dropping him off and returning to you in the early morning to tell you whats happened.. Ahh. 
Such a weird situation! 
If you don't feel good about it, take it further. I mean in one sense, it's good I guess that cops are there making sure nothing terrible happens... but it's the handling it that seems a bit.. off.


----------



## Tihannah (Apr 7, 2015)

From what I understand, in the US, police do not have the right to enter a home unwarranted and without permission. I am going to file a formal complaint. I just spoke to a second supervisor and he was even worse than the first officer.


----------



## Dreamcatcher Arabians (Nov 14, 2010)

Tihannah said:


> From what I understand, in the US, police do not have the right to enter a home unwarranted and without permission. I am going to file a formal complaint. I just spoke to a second supervisor and he was even worse than the first officer.


Tihannah, they had probable cause. They picked your underage son up, out on the streets past curfew (guessing it's probably 10-10:30 ish) at 3 am and brought him home. And you're worried about the cops coming in your home? You're lucky you didn't have to go to Juvenile Hall to pick him up. I would stop with the complaining right now, get in my son's face about sneaking out after I'm in bed, and lay down some boundaries about when it's ok and not ok for him to be out catting around. Next time, there might be a hold up in the area and he'll get blamed because he's who they find out running the streets.


----------



## Tihannah (Apr 7, 2015)

Hold up. Maybe YOU should check the laws, because I child walking back and forth on the street that he lives is NOT probable cause to enter someone's home. If the house were empty and he was home alone, then maybe, but YOU and them are out of line. He's a teenager and it's the middle of summer. Teens have been sneaking out since the beginning of time. That doesn't make him a criminal and DOES NOT make it okay for police to enter my home and bedroom! My son was dealt with, but that's entire other issue. If you think it's okay for police to barge in your house unwarranted and unjustified, then that's YOU, BUT THAT'S NOT THE LAW!!


----------



## SamanthaApp (Jul 6, 2017)

I would be SUPER upset to have a stranger in my bedroom, cop or not. But I would also be furious with my kid, who was ultimately responsible for the situation. I mean there is no reason a 15 year old needs to be cruising with chicks at 3am...

I was a bad kid and used to sneak out all the time, my parents put the fear of God in me when they caught me! I'm so thankful they did, being out without supervision in the middle of the night is when good kids get into bad situations.


----------



## Tihannah (Apr 7, 2015)

SamanthaApp said:


> I would be SUPER upset to have a stranger in my bedroom, cop or not. But I would also be furious with my kid, who was ultimately responsible for the situation. I mean there is no reason a 15 year old needs to be cruising with chicks at 3am...
> 
> I was a bad kid and used to sneak out all the time, my parents put the fear of God in me when they caught me! I'm so thankful they did, being out without supervision in the middle of the night is when good kids get into bad situations.


This is where our opinions differ and that's fine. My 15yr old staying out past curfew is responsible for sneaking out and getting caught. He is NOT responsible for an officer of the law going above and beyond her right to enter my home and bedroom in the middle of the night. If they would've stood inside my front door and waited for me to get dressed and come out, that would be one thing. But they totally overstepped their bounds. Entering someone's home unlawfully and citing a child for being out past curfew are not instances that can be automatically intertwined.

The other two that were with him? Their parents were called to pick them up. But because he was so close to home, they just brought him home.


----------



## SamanthaApp (Jul 6, 2017)

Tihannah said:


> This is where our opinions differ and that's fine. My 15yr old staying out past curfew is responsible for sneaking out and getting caught. He is NOT responsible for an officer of the law going above and beyond her right to enter my home and bedroom in the middle of the night. If they would've stood inside my front door and waited for me to get dressed and come out, that would be one thing. But they totally overstepped their bounds. Entering someone's home unlawfully and citing a child for being out past curfew are not instances that can be automatically intertwined.
> 
> The other two that were with him? Their parents were called to pick them up. But because he was so close to home, they just brought him home.


I do agree going into your bedroom was insanely inappropriate. TBH I have had the cops escort me home  they waited at our entryway just inside the front door and my parents came to them. I get that they want to physically see the parent, but yah they could have walked in to anything in a bedroom! I feel like it was also stupid of her because she potentially put herself in a dangerous situation. Why couldn't she wait by the front door, either inside of the home or out? That's not an unreasonable expectation.


----------



## horseluvr2524 (Sep 17, 2013)

The 4th Amendment:
"The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized."

Of course, they can argue that they didn't technically search your house, but I feel the situation violated the above.

I agree that stepping further than your front door was terribly rude and uncalled for. Even after doing that, going so far as to go to your room, and then seeing that you were not 'proper' for company and still not withdrawing to wait for you to come out... if the higher ups of this officer won't do anything, I would be calling the news for sure.

The one question in my mind is, did your son invite them beyond the door or ask them to wait in the living room?

What bothers me the most is that they didn't withdraw to the living room after alerting you to their presence. Just extremely odd.

ETA: "and no warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause"-my understanding of probable cause is that it applies to written warrants. I could be wrong. But that's my thinking...


----------



## Tihannah (Apr 7, 2015)

I asked him afterwards if he invited them in and he said when he walked inside, they just followed behind him and then the female officer followed him to my bedroom.


----------



## horseluvr2524 (Sep 17, 2013)

Yeah, I can imagine being a teen, even thinking of trying to ask an officer to wait at the door, would be very intimidating.


----------



## elkdog (Nov 28, 2016)

Just one more reason I keep 4 wolves in the yard.


----------



## horseluvr2524 (Sep 17, 2013)

elkdog said:


> Just one more reason I keep 4 wolves in the yard.


Yup, I was wondering about that situation myself. My favorite dogs are protection dogs, like LGDs and Black Russian Terriers. They are instinctively protective and will attack someone who was not invited by the family in. So what happens then? The dog gets put down for doing its job? Makes it seem worthless to have a protection dog then.


----------



## elkdog (Nov 28, 2016)

horseluvr2524 said:


> Yup, I was wondering about that situation myself. My favorite dogs are protection dogs, like LGDs and Black Russian Terriers. They are instinctively protective and will attack someone who was not invited by the family in. So what happens then? The dog gets put down for doing its job? Makes it seem worthless to have a protection dog then.


I don't recommend having wolves anywhere near town. They're here to keep out bears, cougars, and wild wolves. 

That whole Ruby Ridge (20 miles from here) started by law enforcement killing a dog. A mistake not likely to happen again around here.


----------



## horseluvr2524 (Sep 17, 2013)

@elkdog

Yeah, I didn't mean wolves, but domestic protection dogs.


----------



## AnitaAnne (Oct 31, 2010)

Weird situation for sure. Never heard of police going into someone bedroom for so minor reasons. Hard to think clearly when woken up from a deep sleep. 

However, IMO it might be best to drop the issue, even though it was a horrible experience. 

They may have said something minor, like we need to come in and see your parents, and if your son said ok, well then no laws broken. That is him giving them permission to enter, even if it doesn't seem that way. You would not have to be the one giving permission. 

Your DS might have been so shook up by the situation, he might not really remember little stuff like that. Hopefully it put a good scare into him! 

Nothing good comes of 15 yr olds sneaking out at night, and you do want to have a good relationship with the local police, which is why IMO it might be best to let the situation rest. You did call the station, and most likely it was discussed. 

Guard dogs would be shot and you would have no recourse. Sad to say even non-aggressive dogs get shot by the law and again, there is really no recourse. 

Dogs are good to warn you someone is on the property, but not much else they can do. 

If you don't have an alarm system, it might be good to invest in one. That way you would know when your child(ren) leave the house. Plus cameras to show unwanted visitors entering. 

Hopefully this will never occur again.


----------



## LoriF (Apr 3, 2015)

I'm with you in being super angry about the situation. I would be super angry with your son for putting you guys in a situation like that in the first place but he's a kid and lesson learned. It might have been better for them to take him in for scare purposes. It's rare that a kid actually learns when let off easy. I'd be super angry with the officer that had no clue how to handle herself. I've been in a similar situation and it's not fun. It's a whole long short story so I'm not going to get into it. 

As mentioned before, if your son allowed them in then that is constituted as being invited so not a whole lot to be done about that. He should have told them "wait here" but I can also understand why he didn't.

The last thing that I would do is call the news at this time. There is enough unrest over stuff like this that the news just loves to stir up and keep people agitated. The news creates civil unrest and anger, and then the police become more fearful for their own selves which in turn creates them to act before observing more, which creates more civil unrest. It's a vicious cycle that seems to not be able to stop.

It will take a while to get over it, believe me I know. But you will, mostly.

On a side note, I might consider a lawyer though.


----------



## Tihannah (Apr 7, 2015)

Honestly, I'm not the type of person that pursues things like these and I never make excuses for my kids wrong doing. I lit into him right there in front of the officer, and he's been grounded and doing heavy yard work since.

What I WOULD have liked is for the Supervisor I spoke to to have at least apologized and say he would speak to the officer about it. A scenario that many brought up to me was the danger the officer put herself in by being so thoughtless and careless. What if I slept with a gun under my pillow and was startled by a strange person in my bedroom in the middle of the night?? Because THAT is what we are seeing in the news these days....


----------



## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

Outrageous. That is outrageous actions. They should have had your son call you to the door. 


Way out of line.


----------



## Horsef (May 1, 2014)

SamanthaApp said:


> I mean there is no reason a 15 year old needs to be cruising with chicks at 3am...


Well, there is a reason, quite an important one, too - but the society currently doesn't like teenagers procreating.


----------



## Tihannah (Apr 7, 2015)

Horsef said:


> Well, there is a reason, quite an important one, too - but the society currently doesn't like teenagers procreating.


Hahaha, he's really not that kind of kid. He's 15, but still very young minded and is really a decent kid. He was 13 when we moved in our current house and begged me not to throw the big boxes out after we unpacked them. I found him in the backyard playing in them a short time later.  He's very respectful, humble, and open-minded and has both male and female friends. He does have one he calls his gf, but she lives in another town so they never see even see each other, just chat online. He's an honor roll student and on the basketball team. 

His fault is that he doesn't take things seriously enough. Like when I asked him what the heck he was doing outside at 3 in the morning?? He said he was bored and couldn't sleep and his friends wanted to hang out so they were just walking around. He still watches Disney shows...


----------



## Horsef (May 1, 2014)

Tihannah said:


> Hahaha, he's really not that kind of kid. He's 15, but still very young minded and is really a decent kid. He was 13 when we moved in our current house and begged me not to throw the big boxes out after we unpacked them. I found him in the backyard playing in them a short time later.  He's very respectful, humble, and open-minded and has both male and female friends. He does have one he calls his gf, but she lives in another town so they never see even see each other, just chat online. He's an honor roll student and on the basketball team.
> 
> His fault is that he doesn't take things seriously enough. Like when I asked him what the heck he was doing outside at 3 in the morning?? He said he was bored and couldn't sleep and his friends wanted to hang out so they were just walking around. He still watches Disney shows...


He sounds lovely. If I were you I really wouldn't be too upset with him. Really, looking at the current culture of non-stop gaming, isolation and depression that is ripe in young men, I'd be happy that my hypothetical son had friends (and friends who are girls!) to sneak out with.

I'm not a parent but looking around me, parenting is mostly done by their teenage years. He is mostly out of your control already but it sounds like you did a great job. Congratulations


----------



## AnitaAnne (Oct 31, 2010)

Horsef said:


> I'm not a parent but looking around me, parenting is mostly done by their teenage years.


Sure wish this was the case, but in my experience, the teenage years are actually a very critical time. Kids need their parents more in the teen years then when they were babies. It is also a time when children are pulling away from their parents, which really can make things challenging. 

Keeping the lines of communication open is crucial during the teen years. The kids today are faced with so many more challenges than ever before. Getting though the teen years was the biggest challenge that I faced raising not only my biological children, but also troubled therapeutic foster children. 

Horses were a large part of my work with therapeutic foster children. One child told me her horse was her best friend. 

I was considered very "strict" because all my kids had to be up no later than 7 am every day, and in bed no later than 10 pm. Nothing like getting up early to shovel manure out of stalls to help kids sleep at night :wink: 

Raising kids in today's world is very, very hard.


----------



## DanteDressageNerd (Mar 12, 2015)

FYI a poster is ALLOWED to defend themselves against rude comments. Posters are adults, disagreements happen. They're apart of life. As long as people are relatively civil we're all good. Also it rubs me the wrong way when people act like the police or government can do WHATEVER they want. I respect the police, I have a lot of family in law enforcement, Im a former Marine, I served my country but what these policeman did was WRONG and a violation of the constitution of the United States.

Flat out this is ridiculous. 

I think it is absolutely out of line to invade a person's home WITHOUT due cause. 4th amendment violation

"The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized."

I think this fits the unreasonable category our forefathers wanted to protect future generations against. The police DO NOT have a right to enter a private home WITHOUT permission and without probable cause (ex marijuana obviously laying in site or domestic dispute). As citizens the government DOES NOT have the right to invade the home of a private person without PROBABLE CAUSE. This DOESN'T fit into reasonable circumstances. Waking up to the police in your home, let alone your room WITHOUT being invited in IS out of line and a violation of privacy, EXACTLY what our forefather resented well enough to add the 4th amendment to the constitution. 

I would be FURIOUS if the police entered my home without permission. Absolutely furious. I am a former active duty US Marine, I have many police officers in my family, and a US Marshal.

Yes your son shouldn't have been out after curfew but that doesn't warrant the police being in your home!


----------



## elkdog (Nov 28, 2016)

The 5th amendment gives you the right to remain silent. You had no obligation to say anything to them other than "Get out of my house" I would follow with "NOW"


----------



## Zexious (Aug 2, 2013)

^I imagine there are a million things Tihannah could have said, but also imagine they probably would have escaped her, given that she was woken out of a dead sleep.

Seems like a sticky situation. Getting a lawyer, as another poster suggested, seems unnecessary and overboard. A genuine apology would be nice, but may not be easy to pry out of the department.
Either way, I hope you get the retribution you're looking for. It sounds like this is a "one off" (at least for you; we don't know if that's something the cop feels generally entitled to do and often does), and hopefully you won't have to deal with anything like that in the future.


Am I the only one who wouldn't be over the top furious if this happened to me? 
I don't know; I'm obviously speaking from an outsider's perspective. I've never had anything like this happen to me, so I suppose it's easy to comment how I would feel "in theory."


----------



## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

No,I'd be over the top furious,too.


----------



## Horsef (May 1, 2014)

I had something comparable happen, and I was utterly furious. I was going to chase it up the hierarchy but the cop figured out what he did and phoned back to apologize profusely which made me forgive him straight away. "You were right, I wouldn't give out sensitive information on the phone either, just because someone said they were a cop".

Mistakes happen, but an apology in most cases works. Well, US cops seem to be making some very life-ending mistakes lately but you get my meaning.


----------



## loosie (Jun 19, 2008)

Wow, I'd definitely be making a formal complaint - that's totally out of line! The media would have a field day with that one...


----------



## loosie (Jun 19, 2008)

Horsef said:


> (US sounds like a strange place. Cops enforcing curfews on 15 year-olds is just...strange)


Hmm, while my Dad would have(well, DID:redface: ) come down on my big time for sneaking out when I was caught, he would have been also very angry at 'waste of taxpayer's money' for police doing more than necessary & he would have been seriously apoplectic if a police officer had done that...


----------



## loosie (Jun 19, 2008)

Horseforum mods wish to remind people that regardless of how different your opinion may be, it is not OK to state it rudely at people. Please strive to put your opinions in a respectful way to others & treat them as you wish to be treated.


----------



## redbarron1010 (Mar 11, 2017)

I would be angry that the officer came in to the bedroom. She could have waited out in the living room and had your son go wake you up. Or at the door. But as far as filing a complaint, I would call and complain but most likely you will get a lot of "it is the law ma'am" and they will turn the blame back on you and your son. I think it is highly unlikely you will get any satisfactory response. But I would call and complain just the same.


----------



## QtrBel (May 31, 2012)

This is an excerpt of a curfew law on the books near me. (Coastal South). It also includes a daytime curfew when public schools are in session. There are several cities with these types of laws and similar stipulations. The way I read it is that is gives quite a bit of leeway to the officer (even to the point of entering the home IMO). There are reasons for the laws and safety for all is a concern. I am not saying I agree or disagree or that I would not be upset if this happened to me. 

IV. Enforcement, Procedures and Reporting.
(A) 
Before taking any enforcement action under this
 Section, a law enforcement officer shall have the
discretionary authority to make inquiry 
of the apparent offender’s age and reason for being in the public place, for 
the purposes of determining probable cause and whether any defense 
applies. A law enforcement officer shall have all discretion provided by 
state or federal law to determine whether to do any of the following: 
(1)issue a verbal warning and release the minor; 
(2)release the minor to a parent, 
guardian, legal custodian of the 
minor or other suitable person able to provide supervision and care 
for the minor and issue verbal 
counsel and warning as may be 
appropriate; 
(3)transport the minor to the Curfew Center; or 
(4)take such other discretionary, lawful action which will in the 
judgment of the law enforcement officer protect the best interests 
of the minor. 
(B) 
When a minor has been transported to the Curfew Center, reasonable 
attempts shall be made to notify theminor’s parent or legal guardian as 
soon as possible to report to the Curfew Center to pick up the minor. At 
the Curfew Center, a law enforcement officer will make a reasonable 
attempt to do one or more of the following within three (3) hours of the 
minor’s detention at the Curfew Center: 
(1)issue a verbal warning and release the minor; 
(2)release the minor to a parent, 
guardian, legal custodian of the 
minor or other suitable person able to provide supervision and care 
for the minor and issue verbal 
counsel and warning as may be 
appropriate; 
(3)refer and transport the minor 
to the Strickland Youth Center; 
(4)file an appropriate petition in 
Juvenile Court for violation of this 
Curfew Ordinance;
(5)file an appropriate request with the Alabama Department ofHuman Resources
to conduct an investigation; or
(6)take such other discretionary, lawful action which will in the judgment 
of the law enforcement officer protect the best interests of the minor.
(C)
Enforcement of this Ordinance against a minor shall be made by 
petition filed in Juvenile Court. Enforcement of this Ordinance against a parent,
guardian or against an owner, operator or employee of a business
establishment shall be by issuing a Uniform Nontraffic Citation and
Complaint (“UNTCC”) enforceable in Municipal Court. When more than
one minor under the control of the same parent or guardian is found in
violation of the provisions of this section in the same act or incident, that
parent or custodian shall be issued no more than one citation for that particular occurrence.
(D)
This Subsection IV shall not be interpreted in a manner which would
affect or diminish the immunity or discretionary authority, conferred by 

Alabama and Federal law on law enforcement officers and cities.



I highlighted sections which are open to a wide interpretation. All of that said I would make a complaint and while I would expect an apology I would not be surprised if one was not forth coming. Again this may not apply to the OPs situation as I do not know anything other than she lives in the Gulf South.


----------



## carshon (Apr 7, 2015)

I would be very upset that they came into my bedroom while I was sleeping - that being said - as a parent we all look at our kids with rose colored glasses. You may think he is a little immature and that being an honor roll student and athlete means he is less inclined to be a part of a "bad crowd" but unfortunately not always the case. I am the parent of 2 honor roll students, National Honor Society members. My son was a 3 sport athlete all through HS - high honors - excellent GPA and was taking college courses in HS. Everyone always commented on how respectful and hard working he was (and is) BUT - we caught him in more than 1 lie to save his hiney- and his story always differed from the others. Embarrassing when you find out the real truth.

For me - I would be upset but I would let it drop. Since you weren't privy to the conversation between the officers and your son and could not see body language etc - things may not be exactly what you think they were. It is OK to be angry and feel violated (I know I would) but stirring the pot may not be in your best interest either.

Not saying your son is a bad kid (mine graduated from College with 2 associates degrees in 2 years and now works in a lucrative career and he just turned 21 - he makes more per year than I do!)
but they are kids and they know their parents want to believe them.


----------



## LoriF (Apr 3, 2015)

Honestly, If it were my kid, I would rather they had taken him down to wherever they take them and have me pick him up and pay a fine as opposed to waking up to a stranger with a flashlight in my face while I lie in bed with nothing on and demanding to see my I.D. NO ONE has the right to enter my house uninvited without a warrant and that is the law. A kid being out past cerfew is a pretty minor infraction, especially if they were not getting into any trouble other than that. Entering my house without probable cause or a warrant is beyond minor in my eyes and the officer broke the law. 

I just don't get people who just want to fling their freedom out the window for the wind to blow away.


----------



## 4horses (Nov 26, 2012)

Why not make a complaint and politely suggest that the officer gets additional training. I can't imagine that entering a house without announcing yourself is protocol. That said, it is unlikely the police will take any complaints seriously. Probably every person with a parking ticket calls the supervisor to complain.


----------



## AtokaGhosthorse (Oct 17, 2016)

As the wife of a retired officer, with close friends and family in multiple positions of law enforcement (From DOC to Troopers, drug task force agents, etc) this all seems so utterly bizarre and quite frankly, totally against CLEET training to just walk all the way to your bedroom and stand at the door.


----------



## QtrBel (May 31, 2012)

The Supreme Court has ruled that anyone in your residence can give permission for the police to enter and search your home. This means that your children, spouse, extended family, girl friend/boyfriend, roommate, visiting neighbors, friends, basically anyone that is inside your home can give the police permission to enter (and search even if you say no). If I understand and remember correctly based on a classroom discussion we have had, the erosion of the 4th amendment right began with a ruling in 2009 (maybe 2006) stating that if one person objects to police entry then the police have to respect the dissenter as long as the dissenter is physically on the property and return with a warrant but if the dissenter is removed from the property that no longer applies and the remaining party may give consent. That ruling was over turned in 2014 (I think) based on a 2009 court case and basically now favors any consenting party located on your premises. They don't have to have a reason or a warrant just consent. (G)Everyone has their own interpretation but in many places it is a very broad one and one that would be on the side of the law. Does the law apply in this case becomes one question. Does the officer's interpretation of the situation have bearing on whether it would or should apply? Did the officer use poor judgement or discretion in this case? IMO if she felt no threat in returning the child instead of bringing him to a detention center then she should have had enough respect to allow the child to wake his parent and meet that parent in a public area of the house (preferably at the door) to issue her warning if that is the way it is stated in their curfew law when returning a child to the home instead of taking them to the DC. If she (the officer) felt her safety in jeopardy once arriving at the house she should have then taken the child to the detention center at that point and not followed the child through the house. Did the officer overstep by lecturing the parent is another question as well. It sounds like she did. It is the OPs right to file a complaint. It may or may not get resolved to the OPs satisfaction and if the officer is indeed reprimanded or required to attend further training to prevent discretionary errors of judgement the OP may never know. 

Breaking curfew is an infraction of the law and the law states the parameters of what can be done if broken as well as what punishments they can hand out. The OP can look up the law that applies in her city. 

Curfew laws aren't put in place without reason. They weren't put in place just to irritate residents. They are there for the safety of all concerned. If you live in an area where there is one on the books and you fall under that jurisdiction then you are responsible for following the law or suffering the consequences whether you agree with it or not.


----------



## Tihannah (Apr 7, 2015)

I'm pretty sure I have not stated anywhere in this thread that I have an issue with the curfew. I think it is a good thing and knowing that officers enforce it gives me extra push in having my teenage boys follow it and deters them from sneaking out after I go to bed.

I've stated my issue with the situation. I'm not persuing further action. Ive spoken with 2 supervisors and expressed my feelings on the situation and whether they agree or not, I'm sure that it has been discussed and taken note of. 

And perhaps next time, that officer will reconsider before she steps into someone's home or bedroom without their knowledge, consent, or probable cause...


----------



## QtrBel (May 31, 2012)

I realize that Tihannah. You were clear about how you handled the situation with your child.

It is sad that in the U.S. where we have what we assume are rights concerning matters covered we have to defend them for ourselves after the fact because they are being eroded away by current rulings. Kind of like you are supposed to be innocent until proven guilty. Here (specifically where I live) the kid would be cuffed in the back of the car and the officer would be knocking at the door.


----------



## Tihannah (Apr 7, 2015)

QtrBel said:


> I realize that Tihannah. You were clear about how you handled the situation with your child.
> 
> It is sad that in the U.S. where we have what we assume are rights concerning matters covered we have to defend them for ourselves after the fact because they are being eroded away by current rulings. Kind of like you are supposed to be innocent until proven guilty. Here (specifically where I live) the kid would be cuffed in the back of the car and the officer would be knocking at the door.


Yea. That's crazy! 

My oldest son is 17 and a few years ago, we were going through a rough patch with him where he was getting into trouble and just being really difficult. His school at that time always had officers on location. It was that bad. 

Anyhow, I met with an officer and inquired about any boys programs I could get him into or how I could proactively intercept the road he was heading down. The officers advice to me was:

1. To call the police every time he did something, that way he could eventually get sent before a judge and she could send him to some sort of juvenile facility. 

2. Move out of state.

I was trying to keep my son out of that environment, not put him in it! I chose to move.
We did not move out of state, but far enough so that he was completely removed from the environment that he was in. He is in a better school now where law enforcement is not needed to be constantly on hand and he has completely turned around. 

But in reference to where you are at and what we see, I think it is sad that the mentality is to treat them as criminals first, and children later.


----------



## gunslinger (Sep 17, 2011)

Dreamcatcher Arabians said:


> Tihannah, they had probable cause. They picked your underage son up, out on the streets past curfew (guessing it's probably 10-10:30 ish) at 3 am and brought him home. And you're worried about the cops coming in your home? You're lucky you didn't have to go to Juvenile Hall to pick him up. I would stop with the complaining right now, get in my son's face about sneaking out after I'm in bed, and lay down some boundaries about when it's ok and not ok for him to be out catting around. Next time, there might be a hold up in the area and he'll get blamed because he's who they find out running the streets.


I tend to agree with Dreamcatcher.....the officer did you a favor IMO....It seems to me you're blaming the wrong person.....it's your son who's to blame, not the officer.....

I know what would have happened to me, had my dad been woken up by the police.....I wouldn't have been able to sit down for a week.


----------



## Tihannah (Apr 7, 2015)

gunslinger said:


> I tend to agree with Dreamcatcher.....the officer did you a favor IMO....It seems to me you're blaming the wrong person.....it's your son who's to blame, not the officer.....
> 
> I know what would have happened to me, had my dad been woken up by the police.....I wouldn't have been able to sit down for a week.


We can agree to disagree then.

But let me ask you this... if you were pulled over for speeding and while reaching for your wallet the officer clubbed you over your head, would it be your fault cause you were speeding? If you hadn't been speeding, it wouldn't have happened right??


----------



## sqd37l (Oct 27, 2014)

do you put any blame on your son for breaking a local ordinance or is all the blame on the officer? who by the way must make contact with a parent after detaining a minor.


----------



## sqd37l (Oct 27, 2014)

The 4th amendment argument doesn't hold up here. If the cop just dropped the little darling off outside the house, some parent would be screaming that "they just dropped my baby off and didn't even talk to me!!!" the officer may have been better off to send the boy into the bedroom to retrieve his mother but I do not know what the circumstances were. Even a 15 year old can get a gun from another room. This is why I am so done being a police officer; damned if you do and damned if you don't. Yeah call the news and stir the pot more. Blaming law enforcement is always convenient. Too bad someone didn't teach this kid "if the cops bring you home, there will be hell to pay".


----------



## Tihannah (Apr 7, 2015)

sqd37l said:


> do you put any blame on your son for breaking a local ordinance or is all the blame on the officer? who by the way must make contact with a parent after detaining a minor.


Have you read the thread at all or just skipped through?


----------



## Tihannah (Apr 7, 2015)

sqd37l said:


> The 4th amendment argument doesn't hold up here. If the cop just dropped the little darling off outside the house, some parent would be screaming that "they just dropped my baby off and didn't even talk to me!!!" the officer may have been better off to send the boy into the bedroom to retrieve his mother but I do not know what the circumstances were. Even a 15 year old can get a gun from another room. This is why I am so done being a police officer; damned if you do and damned if you don't. Yeah call the news and stir the pot more. Blaming law enforcement is always convenient. Too bad someone didn't teach this kid "if the cops bring you home, there will be hell to pay".


Again, did you read the thread or just skimmed through? Did you read anywhere that I claimed my son innocent or treated wrong or that they were wrong for bringing him home?? 

I'm not gonna debate this anymore. I've spoken with enough cops not in this department that agreed she was outta line. I spoke to 2 supervisors and left it at that. 

Your opinion is fine. Doesn't make it right.


----------



## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

Moderator's note:

This thread has run its course and is now closed. Thank you for your participation.


----------

