# It's my money, and I want to use it for something else.



## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

I think you should put money to save for a car. I think shes not unreasonable she does have a point but you do to. I mean why would she be saying she wont let u use her car much longer?


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

How is it any of your aunt's business what you want to do with your own money?

I'd be upping the price for babysitting, too. Most babysitters get at least $10.00-$15.00 an HOUR, not $20.00 for the whole day! :shock:

You do realize that you're making much less than minimum wage, right? At 12 hours a day, you're only making $1.67 an hour. What kind of garbage is THAT?!

Daycare is expensive, and what she's doing is trying to cheap out on you because you're family. That doesn't fly with me. Taking advantage of people has always raised my hackles.

Regardless, tell your aunt to go pound sand. It's your money, and you will do with it what you see fit.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

EventersBabe: I have no clue why she said I soon won't be able to use her car. I use her car, so I can get their very early in the morning. If she doesn't let me use her car, I would be getting there at 7:15, and not 6.


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## farmpony84 (Apr 21, 2008)

I'm with SR. It's none of your Aunts business what you spend your money on. I pay $100 per week for my child to be watched for about 10 hours (total) and that's actually a good deal. 

If your Aunt wants to be a pill then you can go to McDonalds and work less hours with a larger paycheck. I think I was working 4 days a week for about 4 hours per day and clearing $100 per paycheck at a local retail store when I was 16 and if I remember right, I was paid weekly.

SO... It's a great idea to save for a car, but when you are 16 and you are working that hard, you should be able to do what you want with your money.


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## farmpony84 (Apr 21, 2008)

wishingforahorse said:


> EventersBabe: I have no clue why she said I soon won't be able to use her car. I use her car, so I can get their very early in the morning. If she doesn't let me use her car, I would be getting there at 7:15, and not 6.


I don't know how many cars she has but if you are leaving her house at 6pm then she can't do any shopping or such. Why she wouldn't just drive you home is beyond me though.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

She works night shifts, so she doesn't need her car at night because I'm there with it when she gets home in the morning.


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## soileddove (Jul 27, 2010)

You're definitely getting jerked around.. At your age I would've been itching for a car, but certainly not so I could get up early to babysit your cousin for your cranky (excuse me for assuming) aunt and get paid diddlysquat. 

If you want lessons, take lessons and tell her you just won't be able to babysit anymore if that's the game she wants to play.. Then find a job where you might actually make a little more and tell her to shove off when she can't find a better deal. ha ha That's what I would do I suppose. Maybe you could do it more nicely if that's your usual style.


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

wishingforahorse said:


> She works night shifts, so she doesn't need her car at night because I'm there with it when she gets home in the morning.


Who's home with the kidlet at night? Its father?

I see what she's doing; Daddy goes off to work and Mommy doesn't want to come home and have to deal with Darling Baby herself, so has niece doing it for slave wages.

Yup, I'd be looking at fast food joints. They pay at least $7.25 an hour, because that's minimum wage. 

Then, since auntie will have lost her 12 hour slave wages babysitter, she'll have to hire someone and pay them through the nose. It's a win-win situation, as far as I'm concerned!


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

I just can't stop babysitting for them. They are my family, and their house that they bought had a mold problem so they are renting a house for now. They pay for a lawyer, and I don't think they have too much money. Also, even though Lily(the baby) is a pain in the butt I love her so much.

What really irrates me is that I have to babysit tomorow too(i only babysit monday, tuesday, and wednesday). She had to take a cpr class. So, I miss out on the day my mom and gram have off for work.  My mom usually takes us out too.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

The father is home at night. He works everyday except for Sunday. She works Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday night. She sleeps Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday day.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

When I'm with Lily, no one is around. My aunt is sleeping up stairs, and my uncle is at work.


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

wishingforahorse said:


> *I just can't stop babysitting for them*. They are my family, and their house that they bought had a mold problem so they are renting a house for now. They pay for a lawyer, and I don't think they have too much money. Also, even though Lily(the baby) is a pain in the butt I love her so much.


Sure you can. But I'm also just as sure you won't.

Besides, why do _their_ money problems translate into crappy wages for _you_? It's hardly_ your_ fault they bought a house with a mold problem.

Sounds to me like they cheapied out on getting an inspection done before they bought the house, because a mold issue would have been spotted during a home inspection.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

Speed Racer: Don't get me wrong, I love my aunt a lot. I'm happy that you are agreeing with me, that my aunt is in fact taking adavantage of me. But you seem to be a little too harsh. They did get a home inspection done. They have a good case, and the lawyer is going to be sueing a lot of parties.


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## soileddove (Jul 27, 2010)

Well she wants you to have a car by next year? So tell her you're going to spend the money you get now how you like. Tell her she can give you better wages and the remainder (or a portion of it) would go toward a car. Even if she paid you double that'd still be small change. If you're really so stubborn about babysitting for them keep doing it, although, I don't think it'd be worth it. I'd quit. But I do understand that family is family. But since you're doing her a huge favor, she could do quite a bit better by you, as far as I'm concerned.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

Do what you want with your money. But I say that you need to have a talk with your aunt she has no right to tell u what to do with the money shes paying you to babysit an its your choice.
Id do the same thing if I were u


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

When she wakes up, I'm going to tell her that I'm taking horse back riding lessons. And yay! I'm emailing the stable tonight. I'll be taking horse riding lessons very soon!


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

wishingforahorse said:


> When she wakes up, I'm going to tell her that I'm taking horse back riding lessons. And yay! I'm emailing the stable tonight. I'll be taking horse riding lessons very soon!


Good for you.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

She should be waking up soon. She is only supposed to sleep till noon today. I'm going upstairs..she might actually be painting the nursery. I hear noises up there. Its kind of scary actually. lol I'll be back soon to tell you guys how it goes


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## TaMMa89 (Apr 12, 2008)

She wants that you'll use your money for a car so you could be able to come and babysit your cousin..? (tho I sure understand you can drive a lot more with that car besides babysitting). After you've earned that little money from her with that many hours and after she has called your hobby stupid?

Nada, requires like that wouldn't work with me, I think it's a little too much. I agree with Farmpony.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

Saying horse riding is stupid is soo lame and immature. I mean your doing her a favor. Where in the world is she doing you a favor? I see her doing a favor by paying you money for hrs of work time to me thats kinda sad she act that way.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

I just told her about the horse stable. I asked her if she wanted to check out their website. She will be coming down stairs soon. I told her that I'm going to be taking the horse riding lessons. I said that I needed to do something fun, and enjoy myself. After all I'm 16! Either she accepts it or not is her choice. Her choice isn't going to affect me though. I'm taking riding lessons no matter what now. I have a quick question...What time of the day, do stables usually give people lessons? I know that it probably varies from stable to stable, but I'm guessing that a stable usually doesn't give lessons at 6 pm. I'm going to be taking my first two lessons private.


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## Alwaysbehind (Jul 10, 2009)

I would guess most stables give the majority of their lessons at times when people are not working or in school. So 6pm sounds like a time when they probably would be teaching.


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## TaMMa89 (Apr 12, 2008)

It really depends on a stable. My previous stable gave lessons something around 4-6pm (weekdays), sometimes even after that. At my current stable, the last lessons are given between 7 and 8pm (weekdays).

So most of the lessons are given during afternoon at least over here. Except weekends, they'll have also morning lessons then.


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## Alwaysbehind (Jul 10, 2009)

I am confused by something. You say you are home schooled. When do you do your schooling if you are spending most of your days baby sitting for a relative?


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

I'm not technically homeschooled, because I'm a vlacs student. Vlacs is an online public school. I get my work done on Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. I also will send in assignments when Lily is taking a nap.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

I also do some school work over the Summer.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

To answer your question.
Most stables when there an owner of a stable and don't have other stuff that they are doing they will do when ever you are avalible. I go in the eve or the morn on Saturdays and If I do a weekday lesson its in the eve mom works so yea. but it all depends.


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## A knack for horses (Jun 17, 2010)

wishingforahorse said:


> Ughh..I don't know what to do. I babysit my cousin 3 days a week from 6am-6pm. I have to wake up at 5am to get there! I only get paid $20 a day, and I get paid every other week. So it's a total of $120 when I get my 'check'. I'm happy to be getting paid and everything(used to do it for free), and I'm excited that I'm going to be able to start taking horse riding lessons. Just once a week.
> 
> Usually I take my aunt's car home with me when I leave and bring it in the morning. That's because she wants me there early(at 6 am). My mom and gram go past her house everyday to work, and they used to drop me off.
> 
> ...


I apologize for my language, but that seems like bs. She is PAYING you. And if I'm not mistaken, once money leaves your possesion, it is up to the new cash owner on how to spend it. If you wanted to spend your $120 on scented stickers, whats it to her? (I wouldn't babysit somebody outside my siblings for that wage, btw) 

And as you said, your mother and grandmother drive past her house on their way to work. If she refuses to let you use her car, just start hitching a ride with them again.


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## Citrus (Feb 26, 2010)

This is a sticky situation. You are blessed with a big heart and kind for helping your family. I am sure most family members expect that family will watch their children for free.

It is your choice what you do with your money. Since it sounds like you want to keep the peace, I would not tell her what you are doing with the money which will then mean she can either continue to let you use her car to "let" you babysit or she will have to find another babysitter. 

You are in the drivers seat here, no pun intended. There are plenty of other jobs out there for a 16 year old- there are not any other babysitters who will work out of the goodness of their heart.

Good luck and I hope it goes well when you get to talk to her.


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## Regan7312 (Jul 5, 2010)

Speed Racer said:


> Sure you can. But I'm also just as sure you won't.
> 
> Besides, why do _their_ money problems translate into crappy wages for _you_? It's hardly_ your_ fault they bought a house with a mold problem.
> 
> Sounds to me like they cheapied out on getting an inspection done before they bought the house, because a mold issue would have been spotted during a home inspection.


i agree with SR...get a job somewhere else, they will get over it.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

I can't just take the money out of my account. Her name is under it, and the person told me that my aunt will be notified whenever I make a withdrawel. So that kind of sucks. I had my aunt call the stable today, and they charge about the average..$40 a lesson. All of the lessons are private. I had her ask him if there would be anyway that I could work(muck stables or something) for lessons in the future. He said that they used to do it, but people wouldn't do what they said that they would do. He said that once he gets to know me, that it might be an option.  

I'm very excited. He said that he was going to Kentucky in a cpl weeks, and then when he gets back, he heads out to Texas. I wouldn't be able to take riding lessons till the beginning of November. He said that I can take riding lessons before he leaves for Kentucky. I think I'm going to. His wife is calling me soon.

Another good thing is that I'm going to be getting a paycheck this Friday! So now I'll have $240 to spend! lol. I'm only taking one lesson a week, and I'm going to ask if I can volunteer for free for a little bit. I mainly just want to be around horses. Maybe soon, I can get a job there, if all things go well. He seems really nice.


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## franknbeans (Jun 7, 2007)

I am sorry, but I am obviously missing something here. I love the idea of family, really I do, but this is your aunt. It is not your sister or, what I would consider immediate family. JMHO. She is taking advantage of you. I cannot imagine, as a mom, allowing my sibling (or anyone else) to take advantage of my kid-and have control of her bank account too? That is really the kicker for me. She pays you. *Why she is also on your account I don't understand*. You have a mom......I don't understand why she wouldn't be on your account? Or, why she allows this person to take such advantage of you.
Certainly none of our business here, but this just gets more and more bizarre. 
Sorry, but this chick is taking HUGE advantage of your kindness. She needs a reality check. BIG TIME. Did I misunderstand? Didn't you say she was having another kidlet?
I would also suggest, if possible, you find a less expensive place for lessons. At least in the beginning. (as well as a new employer who will pay you what you are worth, and not have control of your entire life.)


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

It's not really possible to find a new stable. The next closest one charges $50. 

I know that she is taking advantage of me, and it only gets worse. I don't know what to do. My aunt took me to make my bank account, and she told the person she wanted to be involved in it. She has her own password to access my online banking. It's crazy! 

I don't really care anymore..my life sucks. I don't have a dad thats in my life and my mom and gram agree with me, but don't stick up for me when I need them. Frankly I want to get out of here. When I turn 18, I dream about moving to Montana.

I feel so stressed out. People demand WAY too much from me. I'm not going to go much farther with this, because there is really too much to say. There is nothing I can do about my aunt. I have no choice, I have to babysit for her. I have to deal with her. I hope she appreciate me more. She will go out with my other aunt and takes out my wealthy cousins. But no...she doesn't think about inviting me....


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## franknbeans (Jun 7, 2007)

I am really sorry sweetie....maybe you could talk to mom and grandma? Just tell them you really need their help?
You concentrate on having some horsey time.....whatever you can get. They are just plain good for the soul. I think you know that, which is why you are working so hard to get to spend time with them.
In the meantime, hang in there, and concentrate on the good things and your goal. Keep your eye on the prize, so to speak.


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## Citrus (Feb 26, 2010)

It is okay to stand up for yourself. You can with draw the money from that account and put it into another account without her name on it.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

My concern is this woman is acting like shes your mother. Which really irratates me because I would never let my sister be apart of my Daughters bank account personally I would tell your mom and grandma to tell her to stop its none of her buisness.... I would stand up for my daughter she has no rights for that... It would make me mad if I were a mom...
sorry I had to rant but that makes me mad your aunt does that I would quit babysitting for her until she realizes she isn't your mom once you are 18 she has no control over that. So when you do you can turn all that money to your own personal account and cancel that account. Once you turn 18 or if you want work at the barn to work off lessons when you get to know the barn manager.
But I would get a job. 
Personally I do anything I could to get money to work off to get away from your aunt.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

Yes, she is acting like my mother and has bashed out on my mom before. My mom says she has a bad influence on me, but doesn't do anything about it. My mom and gram aren't going to do anything about it. I'm stuck with this until I move. I'm going to move when I'm 17 or 18, hopefully. I'm seriously looking into Montana.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

She's probably not going to be happy when she see $40 taken out of my bank account every week.


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## Solon (May 11, 2008)

You need to get your money, open a new account with your Mom NOT your aunt.

Family or not, wrong is wrong. Hang in there and stand your ground. Your 16 and you have the right to do that.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

I don't think she can take my money out..so I'm not too worried about it. I might just end my bank account, and keep the money in my wallet. It's not really much, so I don't think its that dangerous to do or anything. One quick question...Is it stupid to move far away when I'm 17? I really like Montana. Its beautiful, and seems perfect. I also checked out the median income and home price. It's cheaper than N.H.


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## Solon (May 11, 2008)

I would strongly recommend you don't have her on your account. You can always just keep it in your room. But see if there is a way you can open one on your own. I know my niece had her own in high school, but not sure if there is an age limit. I would do that right away. That is just messed up.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

wishingforahorse said:


> Yes, she is acting like my mother and has bashed out on my mom before. My mom says she has a bad influence on me, but doesn't do anything about it. My mom and gram aren't going to do anything about it. I'm stuck with this until I move. I'm going to move when I'm 17 or 18, hopefully. I'm seriously looking into Montana.


When are you turning 17? You can be in school by yourself. But maybe think about homeschool through homeschool programs. and get a job so you can pay for your rent,phone,etc.
and riding and your car...


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

I turn 17 this May. I'm going to try to get a job somewhere, safe up, get a car and move out of here. I think I'll have better luck affording things in the Montana area. I might have to wait until I'm 18 though. I'm just worried about college. It's a lot of money.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

Ughh...i just found out that even if I moved out of state when I'm 17, I would still have to pay out of state tuition. It is based on where your parents live I guess. I won't be able to afford it. My aunt is on my case about college. What would happen if for some reason...I didn't want to go? (I am going btw.) 

I'm just going to do what I think is right for now. I'll put up with her for a little longer, take my money out of the bank account and take as many horse riding lessons as I can. I'll get a part time job somewhere, save up for a car(my mom might give me her's because she is getting one soon), and leave. I'm not entirely sure when, but I know it won't be too long. I just have to take life one step at a time, and not worry too much about the future for now. And I might reconsider Montana. I never knew that it was super cold in the winter. I hate winter.

I do want to thank everyone so much for the advice and support. Soon, I'll be posting how my first lesson goes! Yay. Can't wait!


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## Alwaysbehind (Jul 10, 2009)

If you think you are mature enough to move out on your own at 17 why are not mature enough to in your mind (because if you thought you were, you would do it, and stop being walked on) to open another account with out your aunt and start putting your money in there?

Heck, have your mother or your grandmother take you to the bank. You being a minor you might have to have an adult on your account. That adult does not have to be your aunt. Call the bank today and ask them the rules.

Open a new account. Take the money out of the old account and put it into the new account. Do not give your aunt your information and she will not be able to have on line access, etc.

It is time to stick up for yourself for a change!!!!!! Well, that is unless you like being walked all over by your aunt, which I am starting to think you do.

As far as the college and residence thing, each state has their own rules. But if you are an emancipated minor it has nothing to do with where your parents live.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

wishingforahorse said:


> I turn 17 this May. I'm going to try to get a job somewhere, safe up, get a car and move out of here. I think I'll have better luck affording things in the Montana area. I might have to wait until I'm 18 though. I'm just worried about college. It's a lot of money.


For college you could get an associates degree.
Go to your local community college and get your baiscs started and stuff choose your degree you want and get an associates its not a bachelor degree but its still going to college.:wink:

Anyways, I sure hope you understand that your aunt walks all over you and takes advantage of you.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

AlwaysBehind: What exactly is an emancipated minor? I called my mom, and I'm opening a bank account today or tomorow. I can get one by myself, but my aunt wanted access to it. I'll just go over by myself. I'm also looking at part time jobs, and I can hitch a ride with my mom and gram. 


EventersBabe: What is an associates degree. Do all states have a community college. I can begin college now?



I am very weak...and people often take advantage of me. I'm just afraid...afraid to stick up for myself. My family wouldn't forgive me for moving far away. But I don't really know if I can really call them family anymore. I'm close to my other aunt(we are like best friends), my mom, gram, and sisters. I don't want to leave my sisters behind, but have a feeling that I need to go. They will get put in the same position as me.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

How am I supposed to tell my mom what I want to do???


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## Alwaysbehind (Jul 10, 2009)

wishingforahorse said:


> How am I supposed to tell my mom what I want to do???


What you want to do about what?


I am pretty sure there are community colleges just about every where in the US. Do you have your GED yet? If not you can do what Eventerbabe is doing and take classes that help you get your GED at the local community college. 
An associates degree is a two year degree. 

It sounds like you need to 'get out in the world' a little more. Being home schooled and not experiencing the world outside your family has left you lacking some basic knowledge and skills.


Consider opening your own bank account as the first step in standing up for yourself!


Edit to add:
I did a google search and found This site that discusses all the locations of various community colleges in New Hampshire (I assume that is what the NH in information means). There appear to be 11 community colleges in NH, all over the state.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

Laconia is close to me, which is an option. I'm not getting a GED, I'll be getting a homeschool diploma when I finish highschool.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

You can do dual credits which is credit towards college hours.  You can goto the one of your choice. But you gotta look up and research because I was also homeschooled but my mom was my adminastrator for college. She worked as one.
You will need to talk with a counselor up there of what your options are.

Anyways, alwaysbehind I was homeschooled and I do just fine.


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## Alwaysbehind (Jul 10, 2009)

EventersBabe said:


> Anyways, alwaysbehind I was homeschooled and I do just fine.


I was not talking about you, or about homeschooling in general, I do not believe.

I was talking about this poster in this situation.

It is hard for me to believe that someone made it to 17 and does not even know what a community college is.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

It sounds like you need to 'get out in the world' a little more. Being home schooled and not experiencing the world outside your family has left you lacking some basic knowledge and skills.



QUOTE]

Being homeschooled doesn't mean you don't experience anything outside of your family.

I didnt know about a community college until my mother told me and I decided to go that route instead of going to TCU which I wanna go there they have the best riding team but what ever. My route is to do community college then transfer over to another college for my Bachelors. I experienced a lot of stuff.
Please correct me maybe I read what you ment wrong? 
But please dont be harsh sometimes I do.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

Alwaysbehind said:


> I was not talking about you, or about homeschooling in general, I do not believe.
> 
> I was talking about this poster in this situation.
> 
> It is hard for me to believe that someone made it to 17 and does not even know what a community college is.


I'm 16, and I didn't say that I didn't know what a community college was. I asked what an associates degree was. I'm not very familiar with degrees..thats all.  I wasn't really sure, so I asked.


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## Alwaysbehind (Jul 10, 2009)

EventersBabe said:


> Please correct me maybe I read what you ment wrong?


You are wrong. Please read what I actually wrote, not what you want it to say. 

Again, I was talking to the OP. 

The OP has not experienced the world and being home schooled is part of the reason. I did not say homeschooling means you will not experience the world. I said the OP has not experienced the world and being home schooled is part of the reason.

I know some home schooled kids who would put most of us to shame on just about every front. Very well socialized, smart, outgoing, etc. I am not anti-home school. 

I am simply stating what seems to be a truth based on what the OP has posted.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

wishingforahorse said:


> I'm 16, and I didn't say that I didn't know what a community college was. I asked what an associates degree was. I'm not very familiar with degrees..thats all.  I wasn't really sure, so I asked.


Its ok that you did not know what it was. Dont worry about it. An associates

An *associate's degree* is an undergraduate academic degree awarded by community colleges, junior colleges, technical colleges, and some four-year bachelor's degree-granting colleges and universities upon completion of a course of study usually lasting two years. In the United States and, uncommonly, in Canada, an associate's degree is equivalent to the first two years of a four-year college or university degree. It is the lowest in the hierarchy of post-secondary academic degrees offered in these countries.



I would go that route until you can get your credits for a 4 year college and stay on campus.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

Alwaysbehind said:


> You are wrong. Please read what I actually wrote, not what you want it to say.
> 
> Again, I was talking to the OP.
> 
> ...


 
Ok I read the post wrong. That was my mistake but please dont go you are wrong. I wasnt reading the post right. 

But please dont respond that way... It was a mistake.

Anyways I figured I was wrong but wasnt sure.:wink:

BTW.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

Thats what I'm probably going to do. The tuition fee is a lot cheaper too.


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## Alwaysbehind (Jul 10, 2009)

Community college is a great place to start. It allows you to take basic courses (and even college prep type courses) at a lower price than they would cost you at a four year school.

The only catch is, some four year schools do not transfer all the (more specialized class) credits you earn at a community college.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

wishingforahorse said:


> Thats what I'm probably going to do. The tuition fee is a lot cheaper too.


Good. I mean going to a community for me its like $150.00 per class and then of course you gotta get the books sometimes you dont even need a book in my math class I am using mymathlab instead of the book he said, that we dont use the book I was like wow really oh great I bought the book.:shock:

Anyways thats a smarter choice most graduates make the choice to do community college to get the basics out of the way.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

Alwaysbehind said:


> Community college is a great place to start. It allows you to take basic courses (and even college prep type courses) at a lower price than they would cost you at a four year school.
> 
> The only catch is, some four year schools do not transfer all the (more specialized class) credits you earn at a community college.


 
Yea that is true. I have been watching what classes I need etc before I can transfer but I have been taking the classes that will take me to transfer.

So just be sure to watch out and talk with a counselor about what classes you need to take and stuff.


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## TaMMa89 (Apr 12, 2008)

Oh dear... That thread has gained a lot of replies after I posted here yesterday.

To the OP: I'm sorry you've to stand a situation like that. I see some people can be very dominating and after you've lived under their influnce for long time, even for the whole of your life, it can be hard to rip yourself out of it...

I'm still sure you're able to do that if you really want. Like someone mentioned, talk to your grandma and mom. Even they'd seem to be withdrawing in front of your aunt, demand them to stand for you. You've a mom and since you're still minor, she should stand for you in situations in which someone acts toward you like your aunt acts just now. Sure some moms have their own issues and can't/doesn't do that because of it, but perhaps she could at least support you behind your aunt's back?

What kind of friends do you have? Sometimes our friends can be a real resource for us. If you've friends who lives on their own already, ask some advices. Start to search information on the web, ask if you meet some trustworthy adult. Start becoming independent with small steps, that bank account would be a good start.

Good luck! I'm sure things will work out.


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## GuitarChump (Sep 8, 2010)

Why would you work for your aunt? You know that you could make $20 dollars in 2 and a half hours at any other job. You should get a part time job somewhere else and make some real money.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

I talked to my mom and gram and they feel that it is right to babysit for my aunt. I'm very sure that I might be able to get a job at the stable. They are very nice people, and I think that they will need help around the stable, because they were already mentioning that they were really busy.

I only have two friends, other than family. I don't talk to them much though. They aren't really that type of friend. I'm trying to make friends..its just hard to come across good ones.

Whenever I talk to my mom about my future, she just tells me not to worry about it, and that she is too stressed out to talk.

I think the riding lessons will make me feel much better. And things will work out sooner or later. I just know they will.


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## Solon (May 11, 2008)

You're getting close to being an adult. *You* can decide where/how you want to work.


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## my2geldings (Feb 18, 2008)

From an adult's perspective I can see why she would say that. Having said that she should not be telling you what to do with your money. How old are you roughly? assuming you're a younger forum poster, doing what you do to get the money you get is hard earned money. 

I dont think some people would agree with me on this, but I honestly don't think you should be worrying about a car. There is a time and place for that, and that should be when you're older and working a regular part time or full time job, not doing chore work and make $120 a month. Go have fun! go play with the money you made. You should be worrying about being a young lady and working with horses, doing what it is you enjoy doing, not saving for a car-something someone a little older should be worrying about.

Cheers!


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## IntentionalFamily (Jul 22, 2010)

Wishing-I just wanted to say I think it is awesome that you are keeping a positive attitude despite the way things are going with your family. 

On a side note-I would not save up money for a car in an account to which a person with money problems has access.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

My2Geldings said:


> From an adult's perspective I can see why she would say that. Having said that she should not be telling you what to do with your money. How old are you roughly? assuming you're a younger forum poster, doing what you do to get the money you get is hard earned money.
> 
> I dont think some people would agree with me on this, but I honestly don't think you should be worrying about a car. There is a time and place for that, and that should be when you're older and working a regular part time or full time job, not doing chore work and make $120 a month. Go have fun! go play with the money you made. You should be worrying about being a young lady and working with horses, doing what it is you enjoy doing, not saving for a car-something someone a little older should be worrying about.
> 
> Cheers!


I'm 16 and btw, I make $240 every month. I'm not going to really worry about a car and all of that, because there is really no reason to..I can't wait for the lesson instructor to call me tonight! Thanks


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

IntentionalFamily said:


> Wishing-I just wanted to say I think it is awesome that you are keeping a positive attitude despite the way things are going with your family.
> 
> On a side note-I would not save up money for a car in an account to which a person with money problems has access.


Thanks, and my money is safe now. I just had to remove her access from it.  I didn't have to make a new one.


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## GuitarChump (Sep 8, 2010)

You could be making 500 a month at a part time job, meeting people making new friends, and you should be thinking about your future. I was home schooled too and I know if you dont push to get out into the real world you become sheltered. I had music to get me out there, you need something too. Working at the barn is good but working for your aunt for $20 a day is ridiculous.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

GuitarChump said:


> You could be making 500 a month at a part time job, meeting people making new friends, and you should be thinking about your future. I was home schooled too and I know if you dont push to get out into the real world you become sheltered. I had music to get me out there, you need something too. Working at the barn is good but working for your aunt for $20 a day is ridiculous.


Oh I forgot to mention..my aunt is upping the pay when she has her new baby. I talked to her a little bit about it, and she is really worried that I will quit on her. I'll be making $100 every week.  So, that's a bit better. She also told me that she will buy me a horse helmet, and boots if I need them.


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## QOS (Dec 8, 2008)

glad your auntie is upping the pay but still you are being majorly underpaid! I paid a young girl (she was 16) $140 a week to watch my 2 younger children during the summer - and they were both school aged. No diapers, formula, etc. She just basically had to make sure they didn't get hurt, burn the house down, etc but I knew that she could make that working at McDonalds. She was good to the kids, honest as the day was long, and a joy to be around. She was so worth the $140 and this was YEARS ago as my son is now almost 23 and my daughter is almost 20. My daughter was probably 5 and my son was about 8. 

While I am all for helping family - but family shouldn't EVER take advantage of family either. Get a job outside of the family - auntie will get over it and if she doesn't she is a selfish cow and doesn't really care about you - she cares about herself. Sorry to be so harsh but I get really burned up when someone takes advantage of a young persons's kind heart without so much a thought for their selfishness. Go to work at McDonald's and you will be surprised how fast you can save for a car and lessons. 

The first step in growing up is making sure that you are fair to others but also expect them to be fair to you. This is unfair and not in your favor. Buy your own boots, lessons, etc. and you will appreciate them even more. Babysit little darling cousin for fun so auntie can go to a movie with her hubby and that is what family is for!!


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

Glad your aunt said, you be making $100 a week and is up for you horse riding. 
You shouldn't quit on her because your doing your aunt a favor maybe she really thought about what you said and stuff.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

EventersBabe: Yeah thats what I think. I know that she is having a hard time with money, and I am more than happy with $100 a week  I am actually very happy right now. Except for the fact that a daddy long legs just crawled on me, and I'm not sure where it is now. I'm actually a little afraid. lol


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## VelvetsAB (Aug 11, 2010)

_I made at least 240 a week after taxes working at Mcdonalds almost 10 years ago.... I also baby sat for the summer between Grade 9 and 10, and made at least 7 an hour. _

_Even though your aunt is upping what she is paying, you still arent making minimum wage. If you work 36 hours a week for your aunt, for 100, it equals 2.78 an hour. Even though *she* is having a hard time with money does not mean *you* get shafted._

_Depending on where you live, you might be able to get a bank account by yourself. Or you could just cash the check and take the money home and put it in a safe place. With her being attached to the bank account, she could make withdrawels from it.....so if you keep saving in it, she has access to ALL that money that you have earned watching her kids. Sounds like she has motive to have herself on your accounts._


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## Shenandoah (Aug 9, 2010)

Although it IS your money, and you CAN do what you want with it, do be sure to think through all the consequences.
If your aunt doesn't let you use her car anymore, will you still be able to get to her house? What are the implications of that? If you can't get to her house, you won't make any money. Although it's been nice of her to let you use her car, she is by no means obligated to continue to do so.
If you find another job that pays better, will you have reliable transportation to that job?
If you want to go to community college, will you be able to get to and from the school?
If you want to move to Montana, will you be able to get around?
How about getting to/from riding lessons? And later, horse shows? Is there someone you can count on to ALWAYS take you? Or will you need your own transportation?

If you are satisfied with your ability to do those things, despite not owning a car, then by all means - use your money for whatever you want!
But also welcome to the adult world, where sometimes we have to put our needs before our wants, in order to be able to satisfy those wants at a later time!


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## WickedNag (Sep 7, 2010)

Should have read the entire thread before commenting....


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## Alwaysbehind (Jul 10, 2009)

WickedNag said:


> Should have read the entire thread before commenting....


Are you posting that to Shenandoah?

I thought, even having read the whole thread, that Shenandoah's post makes tons of sense.


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## wishingforahorse (Jan 15, 2010)

Shenandoah: That's why I still have to keep babysitting for her. I'm tied to babysitting, because I won't be able to get a job anywhere else. That's the main reason I'm staying positive about it. I'm working towards the car right now. I don't start riding lessons until November and the instructor said that once he gets to know me, he would most likely let me work at the stables in exchange for lessons.


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## EventersBabe (Oct 1, 2009)

wishingforahorse said:


> I'm 16 and btw, I make $240 every month. I'm not going to really worry about a car and all of that, because there is really no reason to..I can't wait for the lesson instructor to call me tonight! Thanks


$240.00 a month is a good amount of money. I worked for $10.00 dollars an hr at my old job and made more then that but it had taxes so it was taken out sadly.:-(
But I love making my own money so I can pay off stuff.


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## WickedNag (Sep 7, 2010)

Alwaysbehind said:


> Are you posting that to Shenandoah?
> 
> I thought, even having read the whole thread, that Shenandoah's post makes tons of sense.


No... was posting to Wishingforahorse


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