# Deciding on Dylan



## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I decided to finally make a journal to track the progress with my 15 year old TWH gelding, Dylan.

For background, I am an adult re-rider who jumped in to ownership, rather than being sensible and taking lessons or borrowing a horse to get back into the groove of things. I rode a lot as a older child/young teen, and feel like I was genuinely a very good rider. I never took a formal lesson, though, and often I was riding green or difficult horses that my friend's mom didn't want to put her on. Their argument was that I was very small and light, and therefore the horses didn't protest as much. Honestly I think she liked to show people that a small, young girl could handle the horses she was selling. When her daughter and I had a falling out and stopped being friends, I no longer had access to horses and that lasted from the time I was about 15 until I bought Dylan in 2017, a few days before I turned 30.

Dylan was sold as an "intermediate" horse who was quiet and willing but had confidence issues, and didn't like to ride out alone. I felt certain I could handle it. And I did handle it, for a bit. He didn't like to ride out alone but we did it anyway. Then the bolting started. Again, at first, I handled it. Until I couldn't anymore. Now we could ride happily, but only with another horse. To make a long story short, his herd sourness continued and got worse and worse through 3 different boarding situations, until finally he got to the point where taking him even a few feet from another horse ended in rearing, striking, and all together incredibly dangerous behavior.

In March of 2021, we moved to a dressage barn full of older, lifelong horsewomen and their various fancy, well trained horses. I often joked that I sent my red-neck son to an English boarding school 😂 This is the best thing that could have happened to us. We learned so much in our time there, and we really started to come to an understanding of each other. I made so many new connections in the local horse world and have access to so much knowledge and training advice. I feel like I hit the lottery! I also took my first ever formal riding lessons, which were not as terrifying as I expected.

Unfortunately, this year we left that situation to board again with a friend. The barn owner sadly lost her husband and was planning to sell. My husband and I decided it was time to relocate into the country. We bought our dream home on 14.25 beautiful acres. Now our house is 5 minutes away from where Dylan lives, and the plan is to either buy neighboring land or clear part of ours for him in the coming years.

Moving away from the dressage barn was moving away from our safety net. I feel like we have taken hundreds of steps back in being able to work together and ride alone, and this was evidenced by a bad bolt and subsequent fall almost a month ago. I suffered a bad concussion and bumps and bruises all over. Worst of all, I suffered a huge blow to my confidence and the confidence I had built in my relationship with Dylan.

Now I go back and forth almost hourly on selling him. I know there are quiet, non-spooky horses out there that I would be safe on. But I also know how far he's come in trusting me and I would hate for him to lose that. Before I bought him, he was sold every 2-3 years. No one stuck with him. He was a very shut down horse when I brought him home. I didn't realize it, because he liked treats and was easy to catch. That was the polar opposite of the horses I used to ride so I assumed he liked people. But after spending the last year really getting to know him, I know he was just tolerating people. He didn't enjoy his time with me before. There was nothing good in it, nothing he enjoyed about it. Now I know his itchy spots. I know what brushes he likes and dislikes. I know what legs he likes to stretch and that he loves massages. I know that he's naturally curious and is very happy when learning and training. He trusted me enough to let me in and show me these things, and for me, that's probably more important than being able to ride alone or having a horse that doesn't spook.

My plan for the time being is to continue to work on our confidence in each other, and my confidence in myself. I was cleared last week to ride, so I am working on signing up for lessons at a local riding school. I also bought a confidence building and liberty course to work through with Dylan as I gain the confidence I need to start riding again. My first rides with him will be on the lunge line with one of the older dressage ladies for support. And I'm hoping journaling here will help me stay on track and help keep me motivated to work through this hiccup in our journey together.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I went tonight to work with Dylan. My plan was some basic groundwork to get him focused, then lunging to get him back in shape, and then some desensitizing with the flag I bought. When I got there, he had been rotated to about field further from the barn, which made the plan difficult because of getting the equipment out there. I almost hauled everything in my car but decided instead to bring him to the barn and do everything but the lunging today.

I expected him to be anxious leaving the field, especially with his herd mate screaming her head off, but he was great and kept his focus on me. Dylan tends to lose focus, so I often will count off steps and stop abruptly. If he stops with me, he gets a pat and a good boy (and randomly a treat). If not, he has to back a few steps to refocus and we try again. In the past I tried circling him when he would rush ahead, but for some reason that tends to make him even more anxious and would escalate his behavior. Backing up resets his brain for some reason.

I wasn't sure what to expect when I got out the training flag. I know he's had some natural horsemanship training before, and the last barn owner did a lot with him, but it's been a while. He wasn't phased by the flag for the most part. Dragging it on the ground and whipping it quickly so it made loud noises worried him a bit, but after a couple of repetitions he was fine. We also did some yielding, matching steps while walking, and practiced ground tying. I finished with some stretches and light massage, which he really appreciated.

Before turning him back out, I decided I wanted 5 relaxed steps in the "bad" direction. Of course, as soon as we started walking that way, he had a big spook and jump sideways 🙄 This was literally 5 feet from where we just worked quietly for half an hour. I realized later that the gravel pile had a bunch of fence posts dumped on it, so that was new and probably what worried him. I refocused him, took 5 steps in the good direction, and then got my 5 steps back in the "bad" direction with him relaxed and focused so we called it a night.

Overall I was happy with how he did. Even with the other horses running and yelling, he kept his focus on me and didn't ever get overly upset about it. Seems like such a small thing considering where we are coming from, but I'm okay with baby steps since that is what it took before, too.

I've added an old picture, just because he's handsome 🙂


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## baysfordays (Oct 14, 2021)

He is handsome!! 
sounds like you’re getting somewhere with him which is great.
The TWH I rescued was similar, couldn’t connect with anyone and was superrr spooky, had multiple different homes in just a couple months which was sad. Had different people try to train her & she was still spooky and weary of people, 5yrs layer, still spooky, figured out she was going blind, when I got my other horse she calmed down and isn’t as spooky, but we still don’t have a connection which is ok, she’s old now and enjoying her pasture.

I wish you the best of luck with Dylan! So great you bought your dream house too!


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## Horsef (May 1, 2014)

I was thinking the same thing - get his eyes checked out. What is especially standing out to me is that he keeps majorly regressing. From what you wrote you don’t sound like rank beginner that would cause such huge regressions - especially seeing that you got him behaving so much better on your own.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

baysfordays said:


> He is handsome!!
> sounds like you’re getting somewhere with him which is great.
> The TWH I rescued was similar, couldn’t connect with anyone and was superrr spooky, had multiple different homes in just a couple months which was sad. Had different people try to train her & she was still spooky and weary of people, 5yrs layer, still spooky, figured out she was going blind, when I got my other horse she calmed down and isn’t as spooky, but we still don’t have a connection which is ok, she’s old now and enjoying her pasture.
> 
> I wish you the best of luck with Dylan! So great you bought your dream house too!


The vet said his eyes are fine. That was my first thought, too, because he really can go from perfectly fine to a giant spin and bolt out of nowhere. Which is how I got my head injury!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Horsef said:


> I was thinking the same thing - get his eyes checked out. What is especially standing out to me is that he keeps majorly regressing. From what you wrote you don’t sound like rank beginner that would cause such huge regressions - especially seeing that you got him behaving so much better on your own.


My equine education was very non traditional, so I have major gaps in my training lol. I don't really consider myself a beginner but in a lot of ways I am. I definitely didn't get him "better" all alone, the BO and all of the other women at the last place were a huge help. I gained a lot of skills and knowledge and I know how to get him "back" now.


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## baysfordays (Oct 14, 2021)

boatagor said:


> The vet said his eyes are fine. That was my first thought, too, because he really can go from perfectly fine to a giant spin and bolt out of nowhere. Which is how I got my head injury!


Oh no!  
Hope you figure it out! A head injury sounds painful


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## QtrBel (May 31, 2012)

Worse than the pain is the damage done to that delicate organ that has effects that can be life altering. Either temporarily or in some cases permanently.


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

I just wanted to say, I am rooting for you guys.


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

Wish you luck with your horse.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

There hasn't been much training in the last week or so. We went out of town for my birthday and the weather hasn't been cooperating. I try to remind myself that there's no timeline for this and with horses, it's always going to be a work in progress. I did have an epiphany this week that I think maybe will help us get through his fear in the future, though. I was really analyzing the difference between the way I ride him in the arena vs on the trail and realized that in the arena, I'm ALWAYS concentrated on doing something. Halting with my seat, controlling his pace, adding or removing bend in his body, etc. On the trails I tend to want to sit back and enjoy the ride. Unfortunately, I don't think that's ever going to work for him. Our trainer at the last barn said he basically has horse ADHD. He's always looking at this, what's that over there, I heard a noise, etc. The way I ride in the arena occupies his mind, so he's not able to get worried and we don't build up too many rabbits. On the trail, I'm not actively riding and I'm more of a passenger, allowing his mind to wander and find monsters everywhere. It's going to be a journey of not only helping him with fear and confidence but retraining myself to be an active rider 100% of the time to help his wandering mind stay on me.

Tonight I had planned to lunge him after dinner but we had a big rainstorm so the ground was too wet and slippery. Instead I grabbed the training flag and headed out with dinner. He's pastured with my friend's mare and she warned me that she was very afraid of the flag, so I wasn't hopeful that I'd even get to use it. When I came in the pasture with it she was snorting and wide eyed, but I just let it rest on the ground while he ate and eventually she approached it and sniffed. After that she backed off and I worked with Dylan.

I only brought a couple of treats since I wasn't sure if I would even get to work with him, and I also didn't bring a halter or lead rope. I think part of his worry when he's being ridden is knowing he can't get away when something scares him, so I thought maybe working at liberty would make him feel more secure. I used the flag in the same way as before, gently trailing it along the ground and over his body, rewarding him for curiosity and standing calmly. I quickly ran out of treats and expected him to immediately leave, but to my surprise he stayed and worked with me for another 5 minutes or so. I guess to a lot of people that wouldn't seem like much, but his willingness to stay and work on something "scary" with me without the lure of treats once again reminded me why I want to work through his issues instead of just selling him on. Eventually a deer crashed in the woods nearby and broke the spell and he turned back to grazing.

I recently watched a "trainer" use a flag with a gelding to desensitize where he would randomly whip it out of nowhere and whack the horse with it as hard as he could. The horse was absolutely baffled and eventually was standing and trembling in anticipation of the smack. I could go on and on about how awful the trainer is, but I just mention it here to say that I definitely don't do that when training, and especially not with a wary mare in the same pasture. She stood near us but not within reach for the whole time, and by the end I could trail it along the ground without her seeming worried about it moving. She's not my horse and maybe I should have moved him away during the session, but I guess I can't regret helping her be a little less fearful of it as well.

My new helmet came in yesterday, and I asked my friend if she could ride with me in the pasture this weekend. If not, I at least have a lesson scheduled at a barn about 25 minutes away on Monday.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I went out tonight with the plan of a good grooming and maybe some more liberty work. I was carrying my stuff into the pasture when I got swarmed by yellow jackets. Ended up stung 3 times. Then as I was showing my friend's boyfriend where they were so he could take care of them tonight, we noticed some pretty big scrapes on Dylan and the mare he is pastured with. It looks like they got into it pretty bad, but she's shorter than he is and he had a big scrape right above his tail. It also looked older than her scrapes, but he definitely didn't have them yesterday when I was there. Not sure how that happened. He's always the low man in the field but they've been saying he's been aggressive with their horses so I really don't know what to think. He's always the same sweet guy when I'm there, and it's pretty obvious the mare runs the field. They've been discussing fencing another area and keeping all of the horses separate. I'm not sure how I feel about it but at least I can work with him in the field without worries I guess.

No worked after being stung, and I scrapped my exercise plans for a large glass of wine. This hasn't been my best summer ever!


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## newtrailriders (Apr 2, 2017)

Ugh I'm so sorry you got swarmed! Have another glass of wine!! A big one!!

I've been reading this thread and totally 100% relate. I have been working on getting my mare to leave the barn for a long time, too. I had a bad accident in the past so I'm very careful and I also don't have a lot of formal training. I feel like we're in the same boat in many ways. I refuse to ride Ona away from the house right now - I lead her in hand. I do drive her to a trail and ride her because she's a much better horse when she has zero chance of being able to bolt home and no friends to run to for comfort.

One thing I wish I learned sooner was about finding the edge of a horse's comfort zone. I can't remember where I saw it but there's this target figure that shows the horse's comfort zones with total comfort in the middle and going all the way out to the horse blowing up. Imagine the bullseye being a perfectly calm comfortable horse out in the pasture eating with his mates, then the 2nd ring is a point where you're interacting with him but he's not showing any stress or anxiety at all - like when you're grooming him, then the 3rd ring is the learning zone where he's maybe feeling just a tad bit of anxiety but not showing it at all and enjoying himself- like when you work with him in the arena and he's calm and cooperative. Then there's the 4th ring where he's just a little more alert and looky, but not spooking or prancing or doing anything dangerous yet. Then the 5th ring - he's getting high headed with his ears pricked, and the 6th ring he's prancing around and about ready to lose it. 

I've learned with Ona that it's counterproductive to ever get her to the 6th ring when I'm working with her at home on getting away from the barn. If we get to that point, we've taken a step back in our progression. I like to get her to the 4th ring and then hang out between there and the 3rd for most of the lesson. 

I walk her away from the barn to where she's looking just a tiny bit looky and we stop, and then walk back to where she's comfortable. We go back and forth between her being slightly looky and her being comfortable and then we hang out in zone 4, the "looky zone," and I pet her until she's calm and has her head down and she's bored, and this becomes her new comfort zone. Then after doing that for a little while I take her out just a few steps further to the 5th ring and go back to comfort a few very quick times and then the lesson is over. Back and forth from mild anxiety to comfort. _Going back to comfort often is the key, to keep her from just getting more and more anxious_. If we get one inch further than we did the day before, it's progress - and sometimes we go much further. 

The line between zone 4 "looky" and zone 6 "danger" can be just a couple of steps. At first, she was looky 2 steps inside the gate and rearing just one step outside the gate. It took a long time to get past that. 

We walked a mile away from the house the other day after going half a mile the previous day so I think we're just about over our barn sour issues but I got excited and pushed her too far, against my better judgment. She got to "zone 6" so I do anticipate that next time we go out she might not do as well for me and i won't hold it against her if we only go 3/4 mile. Maybe I'll just deliberately take her that far and turn back even if she seems OK.

I wonder if you might not notice the subtle signs of Dylan being at the edge of his comfort zone - and it might seem as if he's suddenly bolting but in reality maybe he's been hanging out in zone 4 or 5 for a while, _without going back to comfort_, and his anxiety has been building up.

Just one possibility! Keep it up. Do something with him as often as you can and don't feel like you have to push him or try to make progress every day. Sometimes you can just do stuff where he's comfortable - but make him do stuff so he's listening to you and doesn't decide he's the boss.

Edit: I forgot to mention that I often make her do something I'm teaching her while we're in the "looky zone," like right now we're working on yielding front an back quarters and I'm going to keep working with that until I get her side passing. It takes her mind off looking around.


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## knightrider (Jun 27, 2014)

newtrailriders said:


> I've been reading this thread and totally 100% relate. I have been working on getting my mare to leave the barn for a long time, too. I had a bad accident in the past so I'm very careful and I also don't have a lot of formal training. I feel like we're in the same boat in many ways. I refuse to ride Ona away from the house right now - I lead her in hand. I do drive her to a trail and ride her because she's a much better horse when she has zero chance of being able to bolt home and no friends to run to for comfort.
> 
> One thing I wish I learned sooner was about finding the edge of a horse's comfort zone. I can't remember where I saw it but there's this target figure that shows the horse's comfort zones with total comfort in the middle and going all the way out to the horse blowing up. Imagine the bullseye being a perfectly calm comfortable horse out in the pasture eating with his mates, then the 2nd ring is a point where you're interacting with him but he's not showing any stress or anxiety at all - like when you're grooming him, then the 3rd ring is the learning zone where he's maybe feeling just a tad bit of anxiety but not showing it at all and enjoying himself- like when you work with him in the arena and he's calm and cooperative. Then there's the 4th ring where he's just a little more alert and looky, but not spooking or prancing or doing anything dangerous yet. Then the 5th ring - he's getting high headed with his ears pricked, and the 6th ring he's prancing around and about ready to lose it.
> 
> ...


I found this to be extremely interesting and useful to me! I am so glad you wrote this! I am going to start working with Windy this way, very different and much better than what I was doing.


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## newtrailriders (Apr 2, 2017)

knightrider said:


> I found this to be extremely interesting and useful to me! I am so glad you wrote this! I am going to start working with Windy this way, very different and much better than what I was doing.


 Awesome! That makes me feel fantastic!

What were you doing?


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## ksbowman (Oct 30, 2018)

newtrailriders said:


> Ugh I'm so sorry you got swarmed! Have another glass of wine!! A big one!!
> 
> I've been reading this thread and totally 100% relate. I have been working on getting my mare to leave the barn for a long time, too. I had a bad accident in the past so I'm very careful and I also don't have a lot of formal training. I feel like we're in the same boat in many ways. I refuse to ride Ona away from the house right now - I lead her in hand. I do drive her to a trail and ride her because she's a much better horse when she has zero chance of being able to bolt home and no friends to run to for comfort.
> 
> ...


 This is similar to what I do, except I take them to where they get prancy then I ride back to the barn and into the pen and work them. Then back out til prancy or nervous then back to then pen for work. Pretty soon it is easier to be away from the pen and their buddy than to be where he is. I also go a little further each time like you. It works very well. This all happens over multiple rides. Ki has gotten relaxed going by her self. What she lacks is riding with others. She's only rode with other horses once other than with her buddy though so she needs more exposure to other horses.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

newtrailriders said:


> Ugh I'm so sorry you got swarmed! Have another glass of wine!! A big one!!
> 
> I've been reading this thread and totally 100% relate. I have been working on getting my mare to leave the barn for a long time, too. I had a bad accident in the past so I'm very careful and I also don't have a lot of formal training. I feel like we're in the same boat in many ways. I refuse to ride Ona away from the house right now - I lead her in hand. I do drive her to a trail and ride her because she's a much better horse when she has zero chance of being able to bolt home and no friends to run to for comfort.
> 
> ...


I've been trying to work on the zones with him. It's definitely helped in the past. Unfortunately, right now my zones are even more restricted than his are! I find myself very nervous anywhere but in the field, mostly due to how his pasture mate reacts when we walk away. The last time we left her, he didn't seem to mind, but I was on pins and needles the whole way waiting for him to go back to the rearing and striking.


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## newtrailriders (Apr 2, 2017)

boatagor said:


> I've been trying to work on the zones with him. It's definitely helped in the past. Unfortunately, right now my zones are even more restricted than his are! I find myself very nervous anywhere but in the field, mostly due to how his pasture mate reacts when we walk away. The last time we left her, he didn't seem to mind, but I was on pins and needles the whole way waiting for him to go back to the rearing and striking.


That's me if I try to RIDE Ona away from the house. I get to zone 6 as soon as we hit the end of the driveway LOL. I'm just going to keep hand walking her until I get calmer!!!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

newtrailriders said:


> That's me if I try to RIDE Ona away from the house. I get to zone 6 as soon as we hit the end of the driveway LOL. I'm just going to keep hand walking her until I get calmer!!!


That's where I am right now. I don't care if it takes a year to get back on him, I want us both to feel comfortable and happy and relaxed. However long that takes is fine.


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## knightrider (Jun 27, 2014)

newtrailriders said:


> What were you doing?


Windy is unique in that she rides out perfectly fine. I think, "What a great ride we're having! She's doing so good!" It's so fun, and I'm so proud of her, we ride on and on. And THEN . . . when it's time to head home, she bounces and leaps about, throws up her head, bonks my nose, and the whole way home is scary and difficult because she wants to do running walk all the way home.

So, in the bad old days, I would get off and lead her, because I was scared. But I'd be so far out that I couldn't walk that far, leading a bouncing jumping, spinning crazy mare. When she'd sort of calm down, I'd get back on, because I didn't want to walk anymore. I'd think, "It can't be THAT bad." But it was, and I'd get off again. Misery.

So I started just leading her out until I'd get tired of walking and then lead her home. At zone 6, I didn't realize there were zones and I'd just keep leading her. I wasn't paying attention to her zones. And now I will. I never took her back to her comfort zone (and she definitely has one). We'd just head out and come back when I didn't think I could walk anymore. I'd try to let her graze, but she'd be too upset to graze. I had her way out of her comfort zone by then.

With these new ideas, I think this winter is going to go much much better for me, and I thank you so much! (it's only in winter that she's so scary. She's fine in late spring, summer, early fall when she's in a big pasture all day and all night.

Again, I thank you so much for your input. Sorry, @boatagor for co-oping your thread.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

knightrider said:


> Windy is unique in that she rides out perfectly fine. I think, "What a great ride we're having! She's doing so good!" It's so fun, and I'm so proud of her, we ride on and on. And THEN . . . when it's time to head home, she bounces and leaps about, throws up her head, bonks my nose, and the whole way home is scary and difficult because she wants to do running walk all the way home.
> 
> So, in the bad old days, I would get off and lead her, because I was scared. But I'd be so far out that I couldn't walk that far, leading a bouncing jumping, spinning crazy mare. When she'd sort of calm down, I'd get back on, because I didn't want to walk anymore. I'd think, "It can't be THAT bad." But it was, and I'd get off again. Misery.
> 
> ...


No worries! I love hearing what works and doesn't for others.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

I really like what you said about the arena vs outside. I know a lot of horses like that. One of the things we do, is if they start getting a little upset outside, we work them like you would in an arena. So, maybe trot around a brush, do rollbacks, spin… just things to bring their mind to focus on you. There are the occasional horses that only work up with that method, so you have to know the horse of course. Most of the time it’s helpful, sometimes it isn’t. Lol

My grandpa always explained it in a way that said a horse can only focus well on one thing at a time. So, if he’s thinking about you, then he can’t very well think about the scary thing he’s worried about. Of course, it is sometimes hard to change the focus, and is why he struggles to think about you when he’s thinking about what is bothering him.

I think I like to play with the comfort zones a little, and I’ve heard the concept before, but I do better thinking about a line. I’m sure everyone has heard that concept before, so I won’t explain it. I do try and bring a horse back to calm though when they start getting worked up, and in the very beginning of them being upset. For many, that does look like doing an exercise which takes their attention, is somewhat difficult, and that they are good at. Then, they seem to usually come back down to a place they are confident and comfortable.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

Oh, a trick my grandpa taught me! It goes with the same theory of focus. If you are stuck and they are frightened, like teaching a horse to brand calves and he has to stand still, but so much is going on that’s really scary to him in the beginning, is to kind of pull on the bottom of their mane. You pull and pet right there (hands can’t go far on a colt when you have your rope to consider). If you can catch their attention on what you are doing to their mane, they sometimes focus on that and not on what is going on!


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## knightrider (Jun 27, 2014)

Knave said:


> You pull and pet right there


I read a long time ago that a horse much prefers to have its withers massaged than patting them on the neck. Don't know if it is true, but when they mutually groom, they do scratch with their teeth around the wither area, and they never pat one another.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I had planned Sunday to go out and attempt to ride Dylan in the field. My new, fancy MIPS helmet came in and I'm mostly healed. I asked my friend to ride with me, because he does great with her mare around, and she said yes. However, once I got out there I found only Dylan in the field. She and her boyfriend had decided to ride early, without me. He was covered in sweat and really upset about being left alone. I decided then I wasn't riding, but thought maybe I could still get him groomed and do some ground work. 

Getting him to the barn took quite a while. He almost lost it when a bunny ran in front of us, but I kept him under control. We did a lot of stopping, backing up, walking, backing up, etc but we got to there in one piece. They were at the barn as well, and I thought their ride was over, but they decided to ride inside the closest field since the mare was being contrary as well. Unfortunately with them riding away again, I couldn't get him settled enough for grooming. We did some ground work, but he was never truly focused. 

My friend came back with her boyfriend's gelding because her mare was acting up, so after that he calmed enough for me to groom him a bit and at least clean his feet and put some ointment on his wounds. They're healing very well, thankfully. 

Overall, it wasn't a great day, and it was another thing to think about as far as if I'm happy keeping him there. If it was a one time thing of them riding without me I wouldn't care, but it seems to be a pattern and it's very frustrating. I can't ride him out alone, there's no arena to ride in, and I can't ride in the field or her mare follows us the entire time. We are going to clear land here for him, but it's likely going to be several years before we're ready for him. I've asked them if I could put up a temporary arena somewhere there, and they seemed okay with it, but they change their minds so often I can't figure out how to even get started. They're talking again about fencing in another area so each horse has individual turnout, and I'd like to see how that goes before deciding to move him. I'm so tired of moving him!

Yesterday, I had a lesson at a training and boarding facility about 20 minutes away. I've heard good things about it from a lady at our last barn, and bad things about it from my friend at our current place. I personally fell in love instantly! It's a beautiful, clean, well run place. All of the horses are obviously very well taken care of, the people are incredibly friendly and obviously very, very knowledgeable. The owner is a former eventer, and remembered me even though we only had a short conversation on the phone and I was booked with another instructor. They also have an OTTB rehab non-profit that they run there, so that's very interesting to me. I've been in love with thoroughbreds since I was a young girl and read a book series about racing, but everyone has always told me it's not the breed for me. At least I can watch them here!

My lesson was great. I explained to the instructor about my recent fall, that I'm trying to fill in gaps in my riding knowledge from never having lessons as I was learning, and that I'm really hoping to build confidence so I'm comfortable riding my own horse again. She told me I was very brave for riding again so quickly after such a bad fall, lol, and was very patient with me. She was strict, but I understand that. The horse was a 20-something year old QH gelding that wouldn't even walk unless your seat and cues were perfect, so that was a complete change from Dylan, who walks on when I just think "go." 

But that kind of horse is exactly what I need right now. We had high winds from an incoming storm, horses acting up in the nearby pastures from it, a new-to-the-farm mini walking around, etc and the gelding just walked along as quietly (and slowly) as he could. I wasn't afraid, at all, which was great. 

The entire lesson was at the walk, and probably 3/4 of it was in 2 point, so it was quite the workout for me. I was dripping sweat by the end, and I'm in relatively good shape. She was trying to get my heels down and my seat lighter, as she said I tend to lean too far back in the saddle and that's why I was having trouble getting the horse moving. By the end I could get and keep him in a nice working walk, which was quite an improvement over not getting him to move at all lol.

The instructor seemed a bit worried that I had been bored and wouldn't come back, but I told her it was exactly what I needed and I was very happy with what we had done. She said my seat and leg placement had improved drastically just within that lesson, and next time we would work on trotting. I've really never learned to post, because when I rode as a kid, Western riders didn't do it, and now Dylan isn't supposed to trot, so there was no way to really learn. I did take 3 lessons with a local woman just to learn the basics, and felt pretty confident in my ability after that, but it's been almost a year since then so I'm pretty rusty. I scheduled for next Monday again, and I'm really looking forward to it! I'm sure my legs will disagree with me after though, lol.

I also scheduled an evaluation ride with another lesson place about 10 minutes away. It's actually a therapeutic riding school foremost, but they've expanded to giving lessons to everyone. I'm not sure if I will sign up there. They ask that you pay in advance for each 10 week session and you can only cancel or reschedule once during that time. They also don't offer boarding if I would choose to move Dylan to get instruction on him as well. But I'm going to give it a shot and see what happens. I'm so very happy to at least be back in the saddle!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Today I had my evaluation at the second lesson place. It was a lot busier than I expected, but everyone was nice and the horse was great. He was a huge OTTB who had a really goofy personality. He was very responsive under saddle, so I actually got walk and trot every time I asked for it. The evaluation only lasted probably 20 minutes in the saddle, so now I need to call and discuss what they can provide as far as lessons go. I don't feel like I got any constructive criticism or that it was a learning opportunity, but it was just the evaluation so I suppose that's to be expected. I really liked both places and will probably take a few lessons at each before deciding which one to stick with. It's going to come down to what goals I decide to set for myself.

I am worried that the lessons will have the opposite result I was hoping for. I say that because I feel very confident on every horse I ride, except for Dylan. I guess there's just a lot of baggage there. The woman I went to last year for the posting lessons even commented that she didn't think I lacked confidence at all. I thought maybe one of the reasons he made me nervous was because he is a forward horse, but the gelding today was as well and it didn't put that pit of anxiety in my stomach like riding him sometimes does. I know I felt confident and happy when I first bought him, but I suppose that's been eroded over time. I don't know if there's any coming back from it. I can afford to keep him and take lessons, and honestly I could probably afford a second horse as well and he could spend his time just hanging out and getting loved on and doing fun stuff, but I can't shake the thought that someone else could have the time of their life on him. And I could find a horse that makes me feel confident and happy and not nervous. He's only 15, he has a lot of life left to be a good horse for someone. On the other hand, I DID feel happy and confident and not anxious on him just a few months ago at our last boarding situation, even if it was just in the arena, so I know that's possible in the right circumstances, too. And maybe I feel confident on these other horses because it's a controlled environment vs riding out, which has become so intimidating to me.

I guess I don't have to make any decisions now, either way.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

Do you think it would help you to have someone else ride him for a time, while you rode other horses, and then rode with someone else on Dylan for a while?


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

That's a good idea.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I don't really have anyone who could ride him. Maybe the barn owner from the last place, but she's going through a lot and I wouldn't want to bother her. There's no way in hell I'd let my friend or her boyfriend on him. 

I've considered sending him to a trainer, but I really don't like how a lot of people around here handle their horses. There's a "well known" trainer/seller a few hours away who specializes in gaited trail horses, and the price is reasonable, but I don't know how she trains her horses. I've seen a lot of casual abuse that people say is just "showing them who's boss" and definitely don't want him going somewhere like that. That was the attitude of the terrible place I kept him, and he left there in a terrifying mess. I'm sure if he went somewhere like that he would be broken down eventually, but I don't want a shut down horse.

I've also considered advertising him for a partial lease, where he would get exercise and handling while I'm working on myself. But I don't see a lot of that going on here so I just don't know if there's a market for it. Plus, idk, I just have a weird thing worrying about someone else riding him. 

Really, I think I either need a reliable, consistent trail riding partner who will actually stick with plans or a safe place to ride alone. Preferably both. I'm probably not going to get it where I am now. But I also don't want to jump into a different boarding situation without thought.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

I’m sorry you don’t have anyone like that in your life. I was only trying to think of what would benefit me if I was stuck in your situation. I’m sure that riding with someone just going with you while you are on Dylan would even help. So frustrating.

Fear is a difficult emotion for me. I am afraid to drive. I can in certain places, but I have an autoimmune condition that let me to having some seizures, mostly when I was driving. It led me to a massive phobia. Not driving at all is not possible where I live, but I limit it and just don’t go anywhere of any distance alone. It’s a dumb phobia, because I haven’t had a seizure in a very long time. Several years have gone by, and yet I will have a panic attack and pass out. I can’t just drive through it, and it’s a hard thing for me to accept about myself.

I blacked out on horses some around then too, but I decided to push through that. If I passed out, got kicked in the head and died, I wasn’t going to take people with me. So I forced it, which ended the cycle. Yet, I wasn’t afraid of the horses themselves, but just passing out. Such a dumb cycle.

I hope you can find someone to help you get through this. If it turns in to a phobia like mine, I have no idea how you overcome it.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I really appreciate the recommendation! Maybe, in expanding my social "horse" circle by taking lessons, I will find someone I could trust to help in that way. 

I'm really sorry to hear about your driving phobia. My mom is like that, and has been for most of my life. Hers is anxiety about car accidents. It's really tough for her because she's a very social, outgoing person and she can't drive alone. I feel like that could easily have been me if I didn't see how it limited her in life. I definitely have a lot of anxiety and worry that I bottle up. Exercise really helps, but I've gotten out of the routine after my fall. 

I want to force myself to just get on him and ride, but that's literally what I did when I fell! I just got fed up with waiting for someone to ride with me, and thought "we've done fine riding alone for the last year, I'm just going to do it." And that didn't turn out well at all lol.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

I’m sorry for your mother. It is very limiting. I would say it changed who I am, because I just don’t go places. I am very isolated.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I went to work with Dylan tonight, and took my Confident Pants (lol) and an umbrella. I also grabbed the training flag. I did put on the halter and lead rope today for introducing the umbrella. I figured it wouldn't be smart to let him run away if it scared him vs keeping him with me and showing him it's not scary. 

I started with the flag and he was great for that. I used it a bit more vigorously today, really snapping it on the ground and waving it all around his head and above him. He didn't care at all. I introduced the umbrella after a few minutes, first while it was still all wrapped up, then undoing the Velcro, then slowly opening it and closing until it was fully open. Nothing bothered him until it was fully open, but even then he was more curious than anything.
















He was okay with it moving all around and by the end, I could hold it directly above his head without him being worried. Although he did keep lifting his head to touch it with his nose lol. We also did some "follow the scary thing" with me snapping the flag, waving the umbrella, and leading him all at the same time. None of this bothered him at all. 

I was going to stop there but he was doing so well, I decided to see if I could use the button to open the umbrella. It's one of those ones that spring open with a pretty loud noise when you hit the button. He flinched the first time, but after that he was, again, more curious than anything. The gelding in the next field, though, was losing it so I only did it a few times before deciding to be done.

I turned to lead him back to the gate so I could put some ointment on his scrapes when he suddenly spooked, jumping off the ground with all 4 feet and trying to gallop off until he hit the end of the leas. I'm guessing there was a deer or rabbit in the brush next to the driveway. This is the part that frustrates me the most, I think. He can stand there with all of these Scary Things that freak out most horses, and not bat an eye, but a bunny in the weeds is too much for him. I really wonder if what I'm doing will ever help, because it's not like I can control every situation. And it's not a Warwick Schiller bunny situation either, because he was completely calm one second and gone the next. 

He was really worried, and I didn't want to end such a good lesson on a bad note, so I walked him towards the area that was bothering him, until his head came up and he got worried, then we turned and walked away until he was relaxed. We did this five or six times, then instead of walking back to safety, we turned and walked parallel to the scary thing, and each turn got closer. If he froze up, I made him back up until he reconnected with me, and then we continued. If he was getting really high headed with the flared nostrils, we turned away from the scary thing instead of getting closer. I tried to keep myself between him and whatever it was so if he spooked, he wouldn't run me over. It took 10 minutes to get him to approach that area of the field, but we did it. I grabbed the ointment, praised him for his bravery, and then we retreated back to safety for me to put it on. Goodness. He's lucky he's cute.


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## knightrider (Jun 27, 2014)

He certainly is cute. I am glad you started this journal.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

knightrider said:


> He certainly is cute. I am glad you started this journal.


Thank you! I'm hoping that it helps me keep focused and really see the progress we're making. I live with a lot of anxiety and self doubt, and I hope documented the good and the bad can help me keep things in perspective.


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## SueC (Feb 22, 2014)

Hello! I'm not sure if this is going to help, but I'm going to try. You've got this double whammy situation where you've got this almost (from your perspective) randomly intermittently spooking horse, on the one hand, and then on the other you've got the anxiety inside yourself from having gotten hurt in situations like this - and that anxiety is not easy to turn off. Believe it or not, your brain is _supposed_ to develop ambulance sirens in response to situations that remind it of whatever caused trauma before, to get you to stay away from such things (like a handsome creamy-coloured 500kg animal that may randomly catapult into you ) - it's a biological survival thing, and it may run counter to what you personally want to do, which is so inconvenient!

So:
You: "I want to work with this horse and get it desensitised and comfortable in a changing environment (etc)."
Your amygdala: "I want this person to stay away from situations which have hurt them before and which I consider threatening to life and limb."

The amygdala does have a point, but you can use your cerebrum to think about making your work with your horse safer so that the amygdala doesn't get another scary experience and say, "Told you so!" and turn up the ambulance siren to even louder next time you work with the horse and get in situations that trigger your amygdala. (And you've been working on that, and you're here to brainstorm things you can improve etc.)

So I see this as TWO separate things that each need addressing:

1) Helping your horse
2) Helping your amygdala

And I've listed them the wrong way around - in terms of order of priority! 😜

A good analogy: If you're in an aircraft and the cabin depressurises, the first oxygen mask you get from overhead should be put on your own face - and then you can get other oxygen masks down to help other people. This maximises your own usefulness in a situation - even though you have to put yourself first (which we've often been conditioned to believe is always selfish, but not so).

Because the problem is, when you're working with a horse, it picks up even the slightest hint of anxiety from you, and insecure horses, or even confident horses unsure about something in particular, will internalise it: "The person with me is nervous, oh no, there must be something dangerous around here!" The ability to rapidly read the moods and anxieties of others, and for the flight response to spread almost instantly through a group, is really important for a herd animal that evolved with predators - it maximised chances of survival.

Basically, you can't work effectively with a horse when you're anxious, or from the point when you become anxious around your horse. Reading anxiety in you (even if nothing happens in a particular lesson) reinforces to the horse that the world is a dangerous place, and it stacks the dice towards another bad experience for both of you. So you need to be ultra aware of when you've got your Confidence Pants on (loved that phrase, made me smile ), and when they're starting to slip down! And be aware that you're trying to desensitise _yourself_, not just your horse.

Which I think is the much harder part than desensitising your horse... this is tricky stuff, as @Knave also related, and it takes patience and awareness and persistence and a whole lot of lateral thinking...working with your own emotions and anxieties is like herding cats, but it can be done.

You've got to become super-confident so you can give your nervous horse confidence. Sounds so easy and logical on paper, but is tricky! So one thing is to forestall and prevent as much as possible situations which become dangerous to you personally when working with your horse, so you don't get re-traumatised yourself and end up with even worse anxiety. This part is probably best as a group brainstorm, and involves lots of things like spending a lot of time with your horse in an area where it is in its comfort zone, and when you build your own confidence back, you can start taking the horse into more challenging scenarios (and I know this is extra difficult because of the unusual spooking patterns of your horse). Also though, consideration of where you are in relation to the horse - there's safer positions and less safe positions when ground handling, for example - and I always lead a nervous horse with me by their shoulder, so I can't be jumped on and should I get knocked sideways hard, at least I will be knocked out of the way of the horse. Ditto - I don't groundwork nervous horses in a halter, they have too much mechanical advantage that way - at the very least I run the lead rope over the front of the halter, like this...

























First outing with super-spooky, very hydrophobic horse in 2009. He could turn on a thread and take off like a rocket at the drop of a hat when I first started working with him in unfamiliar environments (and I really had to watch my toes!). Notice that neither my friend nor I ever stand in harm's way when handling our horses in situations like this - we're by their shoulders. No looping the lead rope around hands, use both hands, use gloves if you have to to prevent rope burn, etc. We rode later on in that outing, but walked the horses around on leads first to desensitise them to the new area as a "herd" - it's easier for a person to give a green horse confidence when you're next to them than when you're riding, and usually also easier to stop them getting away from you in a panic. Both my friend and myself specialised since late childhood in re-training "difficult" horses (i.e. reactive, highly intelligent, independent types of animals) for our own use, and ended up with wonderful relationships with our adoptees, who were amazing horses to ride. Sadly both of these horses are deceased now, but I'm just in the early stages of saddle educating a relative of the dark horse above, who also happens to be super reactive and doesn't spook at many things, but spooks instantly at some things, like sudden unexpected noises!

Anyway - I actually had a lot more I wanted to say, like I know that feeling you're describing because I got badly scared working with one particular horse when I was 10 and it was like this mutual reinforcement of incipient disaster - but maybe another time...


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Thank you for your thoughtful and educational response, @SueC ! I do feel like I'm training both of us. It's one of the reasons I don't want to sell him. I don't like to fail at things, and I think if I gave up, I would never get over my own anxiety in these situations. If he were aggressive or bad 99% of the time, I would move on with no regrets. But I really feel like he's a sweet, calm, willing horse 99% of the time, so in my opinion, it's really worth it to help him get to a better place with his fear, and in the process, I'll gain skills and coping mechanisms for my own anxieties, too.


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## SueC (Feb 22, 2014)

You're welcome and you probably knew a load of that stuff already, but I tend to run through things comprehensively anyway.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I can ride him in an arena without any fear or anxiety from either of us. I am not the type that gets bored with arena riding, and I enjoy it. I think I will always be nervous on trail rides myself, because I like to feel in control and obviously that's not possible in that environment. So maybe we're not trail partners! We can happily be arena partners instead. If we have a safe arena, we can still do the things we are working on now, and also enjoy riding. But I don't have an arena where we are now and I'm afraid of offending my friend... which is becoming less important to me the longer we stay!

When I learned to ride as a kid, I dealt with incredibly difficult horses and I didn't even know it. It would take 40 minutes to catch them, they would stomp your feet or run your knees into fence posts, they wouldn't pick up their feet, they ignored all of your cues, they often bit and kicked, etc. I wouldn't describe him as a difficult horse, personally. He is always willing to do anything I ask. Even when he's irritated or unsure, the most I get is a tail swish or a head toss. He is very responsive, and (mostly) forward without getting hot, which I prefer over a horse that just plods along. He is easy to handle, and has never done anything to hurt me on purpose. He's really come out of his shell and now I do think he enjoys spending time with me, so where before I could approach him in the field and catch him, now he comes to me as soon as he sees me.

I think he has some baggage and just panics sometimes. Maybe I'm putting human emotions onto an animal, but I think he probably doesn't trust that someone can keep him safe so he just takes himself out of the scary situation. When he bolts, I can mostly get him stopped. This last time, I would have been fine without my saddle slipping. I'm sure he has no lingering effects from it, now it's me that's unsure. I have this panic when I think about riding anywhere but an arena with nice deep sand and a fence lol.

I have been thinking a lot about getting a second opinion on his eyesight. I had 2 vets and 2 farriers tell me there was nothing wrong with his feet before someone finally diagnosed his central sulcus thrush. I wonder often if it would be easier to treat if it had been diagnosed earlier.


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## SueC (Feb 22, 2014)

It's a shame that the barn with arena and many other people with expertise (some of them even with useful expertise and not unsolicited useless expertise, which is rife at some barns ) wound up. I don't suppose there's anything like that near where you have Dylan now, that you could consider relocating him to? You'd have an arena and likely some regular riding buddies for trails, plus you'd be less isolated.

The riding lessons sound like a good idea at least for a while because you get to ride lots of different horses and also get some feedback.

Is there enough space where you have your horse now for you to set up a sort-of arena yourself? I did that once, just white electric tape (not hooked up!) and a dozen or so push-in posts on a flat part of the paddock.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I had another riding lesson today. I wouldn't say it was great, but it wasn't terrible, either. It had just poured, the horse was grumpy, and I'm really finding it difficult to get him to do things. He's the type that won't do anything unless you ask correctly. So my seat, and my hands, and my lower leg, etc all have to be juuuuuust right, or he won't even walk. I did get him trotting, and got to work on posting a bit, but he tried to run off with me a few times to see if he could. A few good things: she said I have a rock solid lower leg, my heels stayed down, my posting did improve, and I worked through him getting too fast on me without feeling panicked about bolting or falling off. Unfortunately I start my new job tomorrow and the instructor only teaches until 5 pm, so I'll probably have to wait until I get my schedule figured out and see how flexible they are before scheduling any more with her.

I didn't have much time after my lesson, but I had picked up some pool noodles for working with Dylan and really wanted to try them out. When I got there, my friend and her boyfriend were hanging out with his gelding. He wanted to see how his horse did with the noodles. It wasn't great, but I also don't blame the horse for his reaction... definitely not how I introduce Dylan to things, that's all I'll say.

While that put a bad taste in my mouth, I didn't want to let that get in the way of our progress. Dylan was a smidge concerned when I came in the pasture with the noodle, but I think he's getting used to me coming at him with weird things and happily ate dinner. I didn't have enough hands for his halter and rope so we worked at liberty. I would say I got probably 5 good minutes out of him, and beyond that initial "what the heck is that?!" he was fine. He did attempt to taste test it, even though I told him it wasn't spaghetti 😂


















I think my next steps will be to start with something he's used to in the field, like the flag, and then move him into a "yellow" zone for a few minutes and see how that goes. I really think I'm ready to ride him again but I don't know how it would go to ride in the field with the mare. 

I did text the owner of the place where I've been taking lessons to see if she's got room for him. If it's not incredibly expensive, I'm seriously considering it. I am afraid to make my friend mad but I can't watch horses be treated like that, and I think it would just be better for us to have a safe place to ride with trainers and instructors around. At the last place, the owner was willing to do lessons on him even though we were both "green" at dressage and I really, really enjoyed it. She said she would be willing as well, although she doesn't typically work with gaited horses. We will see what happens!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I had a big post planned for tonight, but I'm pretty tired so I'm going to cut it short. I got back on Dylan today! I was feeling very nervous about it, especially because it was evening and he seems to be most worried around that time. But my friend and her boyfriend agreed to go at my pace for however I wanted the evening to go, so that was really great of them. I borrowed a western saddle that fits him well vs using my dressage saddle, although I ended up feeling a little uncomfortable myself in it because I'm just not used to them anymore! My friend led us for a loop around the pasture, and then I rode him for a loop myself. And then I was done! It wasn't much, but I really wanted a good experience for both of us. Most likely he would have been fine to continue with the other horses around, but I feel happy with it anyway. It was a big step and I'm very relieved to have gotten past it. It did remind me how much fun he is to ride, and now I'm itching to go again. We walked around and hung out with them after that, with me on the ground. It was a good evening.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

I’m so glad for you!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Knave said:


> I’m so glad for you!


Thank you! I was having so much anxiety about it beforehand, I had really built it up in my mind. It's easy to forget that he's good 99% of the time when my worry takes over. I kept singing and humming the whole time and that really helped lol.


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

The theme to Rawhide helps me.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I have ridden the past 2 evenings. Last night was wonderful. I was in the saddle for probably 30-40 minutes and felt great the whole time. My friends (I'm going to start calling them M and D as that's easier) commented that I haven't smiled that much in months. He had moments of worry, and I did get off once and work with him a minute before getting back on and continuing to ride, but overall I felt safe and he was very willing to do everything I asked. 

He got more worried as it got darker, so I am wondering again if his eyesight is maybe an issue. At one point I was working on "touch" where I ask him to reach his nose out and make contact with an object. He would immediately touch it when I presented it to his left eye, but didn't move at all when it was on his right side. Once I moved it to where his other eye could see it, he would immediately make contact. He also gets really worried if someone is walking him on that side. He often will crane his head and neck around when we're walking, and the spook where he tossed me was at dusk as well. There are times where he stares off with complete focus for a minute or more at a time, like he's trying very hard to see something in the distance. I'm going to bring it up to the vet again, but last time I asked, she said he was fine so maybe I'm just trying to justify his antics so I feel better lol.

Tonight wasn't as great. Dylan had a huge spook right before I was going to mount, so I decided to stay on the ground for a bit and just work on getting his attention. But I couldn't get his focus, no matter what I did. After probably 20 minutes, I attempted to mount but the saddle was loose, and then D joined to ride with his gelding, and in the mix of everything I lost my nerve. I rode for maybe 5 minutes, but we did lots of ground work and I don't feel like the evening was lost. I hoped just getting over the hump and being back on him would be like a switch was flipped and I wasn't scared anymore, but I guess that's not going to be the case. I keep saying I just want to fill our bank with good experiences, even if it's only 5 minutes in the saddle at a time. Another part of me thinks that I should just push through the nervousness and keep riding as long as he's acting okay, but I'm worried that I'm telegraphing my nerves to him and making it a bad experience for him. I want us both calm and happy.

I think we're going to ride again tomorrow, but I'm going over earlier so we can see if he's less worried with more light as we're riding.


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

Yea, I'd try to get a second opinion on that eye, and I just keep in mind that any ride I get in where I feel OK, even if it's for 5 minutes, is a win.


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## knightrider (Jun 27, 2014)

boatagor said:


> I hoped just getting over the hump and being back on him would be like a switch was flipped and I wasn't scared anymore, but I guess that's not going to be the case.


Sixty two years ago, I got a serious concussion when a horse bolted with me, stepped in a hole, flipped, and fell on me. If I am on a horse that starts running and I can't stop him, if I pull on the reins and get . . . pure iron . . . no response, I still get a panicky feeling. I've learned to deal with it somewhat, but it's always there when a horse takes off with me out of control. You'd think I'd have gotten long over it, with the millions of successful rides I've had, but it comes back pretty strong when a horse is bolting out of control with me.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

I think it’s a fair thing to panic over @knightrider! It didn’t used to bother me as a kid, and my mare was a notorious run away. As I got older it bothered me more and more, never on her, but any other horse who’d runaway. I see the same thing you see, holes, ditches, fences… 

Keno really got under my skin with his effort to run into objects. If Queen drops her shoulder at all, I kind of get that panic back. I have worried many times over if she acted like Keno. I think it’s normal for our minds to attach to something like that.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

knightrider said:


> Sixty two years ago, I got a serious concussion when a horse bolted with me, stepped in a hole, flipped, and fell on me. If I am on a horse that starts running and I can't stop him, if I pull on the reins and get . . . pure iron . . . no response, I still get a panicky feeling. I've learned to deal with it somewhat, but it's always there when a horse takes off with me out of control. You'd think I'd have gotten long over it, with the millions of successful rides I've had, but it comes back pretty strong when a horse is bolting out of control with me.


I can (usually) get him stopped at this point after a step or two. I feel like I should be less worried because of that. The saddle slipping was what caused me to fall. I haven't had the guts to use that saddle again, yet. I'm using a spare western saddle of my friend's. It actually fits him way better than every other one I've tried, including my expensive dressage saddle, but it's a very low quality brand so I don't know if I would want to use it long term.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I had a great lesson tonight! I was on a 23 year old retired eventer. He felt a little stiff at times, but he was so good and it was like he could read my mind. I barely thought "go" or "stop" or "turn left" and he did it. The instructor told me before I got on that everyone calls him Mr. Perfect and he makes everyone look like a professional rider and I can definitely see why! Both horses I have ridden there have been OTTBs and I really think I'm in love lol. They're both forward without being hot or feeling like they'll just take off on me, responsive and kind. Of course they're way bigger than Dylan, but I don't feel intimidated by the size at all. Just overall a good lesson and I hope I get this horse next time too 🙂

I didn't end up riding last night, as my family requested I spend some time with them lol. I probably won't have the chance again until Sunday, because we have to go school shopping this weekend. Here's hoping my nerves settle even more before then!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I haven't been doing much with Dylan recently. My kids started back to school and I'm coming back into my exercise routine after having COVID and the injuries I got after my fall, so I'm basically dead after work everyday. I'm also really struggling with what to do. I hoped taking lessons would help my confidence with him, but it seems like I'm feeling the opposite. I hate that I can feel so happy and confident on horses that I've never even met and not my own. So this may be the end of the journal, because I'm really considering selling him on to someone who is a better fit 😔 and getting another horse down the road, after a few more years of lessons.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I have really been down in the dumps recently. I think part of it is that I'm still having some symptoms from the concussion, so after a full 8 hour day of work, my head is pounding and I just want to lie down. I've been forcing myself to get up and exercise again, which has helped my mood and mental health tremendously.

I think keeping Dylan at my friend's farm is becoming toxic for us both. He is a horse that really needs stability. When we were at the terrible place before, one of the problems was the owner "solving" his herdbound-ness by changing his turnout arrangements constantly. Any time he showed interest in another horse, she moved him so he didn't "bond" with that horse. This messed him up so much, he turned violent, to horses and people. The year at the dressage barn really helped him feel better. But now in 6 months at my friend's barn, he has been in an uncountable amount of herd situations again. She sold a horse, bought 2, brought in 2 boarders, may be selling his pasture mate, and is constantly moving which horses are in which fields. One week he's in with just his buddy mare, then he's in with her and a gelding, then they move the gelding clear across the farm and he's sharing a fenceline with brand new horses, then those horses are moved across the farm, etc. It's chaos. And I have my friend constantly in my ear telling me to sell him on, or telling me to call their trainer (who I refuse to work with after watching him beat their horse with a flag to "desensitize" him). This makes me constantly question myself and feel like we would be both better off if I sold, which I'm not sure is true.

We're quickly approaching dangerous levels of worry out of him again. On Sunday, my daughter and I went out to bathe him. My friend had someone looking to buy her mare. Things were great, for a while. He was perfect for his bath, really enjoyed the attention and grooming, and loved the hand grazing (the fields are grazed way down there). Turning out was the problem. They had the other horses out riding, where he couldn't see them. I got him to the pasture and he exploded. I was able to just barely keep him under control and get him turned out, but he almost ran me down a few times in his panic. I know he wasn't interested in hurting me. His problem was that he was in a blind panic worrying that the other horses were gone. When he's in a stable environment, this kind of thing doesn't bother him. I know that, because many times I turned him out alone at the dressage barn and he was fine, outside of yelling once or twice. He knew eventually his friends would be back, so there was no panic involved. I can tell the constant shuffling of horses is bringing back that insecurity and causing increasing behavior issues. It's just not a great environment. 

So I talked to the owner of the lesson place I've been going to. She's a trainer/eventer, and came highly recommended by a couple of the women at the dressage barn. I trust their opinions and if they say she's great, I believe it. She's only looking to take on training boarders at this time, but we definitely need training so that works out lol. I told her we probably won't fit in, and he's not going to be like many of the horses she has there, but she said her training is individual to each horse and rider so that's not a problem. We will likely do one training ride and one lesson a week, and evaluate after a few months to see if we want to drop down from that. I can afford it, although it's going to funnel money away from getting my land ready for him here. I think we both need training and instruction if we're going to be successful on our own, so I'm willing to do what it takes. 

I almost listed him for sale several times this week but couldn't do it. It didn't make me feel relieved when it came down to making that decision. I felt like I was making a mistake. So I do think, in my heart, I know that the right choice is to keep him and continue working towards happiness together. It almost feels like I wouldn't want to have any horses in my life, if I didn't have him there, too.


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## knightrider (Jun 27, 2014)

What a difficult situation. I wish you didn't have these things going on for you. I hope the new situation is a good solution. When do you move Dylan?


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

knightrider said:


> What a difficult situation. I wish you didn't have these things going on for you. I hope the new situation is a good solution. When do you move Dylan?


Thank you. I absolutely hate that I keep putting him in these less-than-ideal situations. I do wonder if he would be better off without me, even if I'm not better off without him! I can't wait to bring him home and give him a steady place for the rest of his life.

She said October 1st would be best for her, as she's getting married this month, and I told her that was okay. That way I can give my friend a month's notice. If she kicks me out immediately, I guess I'll ask if we can go ahead and move him and just start training in Oct. I told her it's really important that he's not constantly moving between turnout situations and she said that her boarders are pretty steady and outside of taking horses to shows, there isn't a lot of shuffling. I'm waiting on her to send over the boarding and training contracts to review and sign.


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## egrogan (Jun 1, 2011)

I completely understand how awful it can be to deal with that blind panic- my oldest mare Isabel is the same (and the reason I have three horses, including two who are retired!). Fortunately she's tiny, basically a pony sized horse, so while she is still dangerous when she panics, she's small enough that I can handle her and stay safe. And at this point, I'm able to accommodate her need to always be kept with another horse, so we manage.

While I know you're having a lot of challenges at once, from the outside looking in, it actually sounds like a great opportunity once you get through this rough patch. You know your horse well enough to know what he needs and what is difficult for him to handle. And you are taking the steps to get him into a better situation, with a trainer you personally like, who seems ready to meet him where he is. It might be a stressful month now, but hopefully it will be worth it to get him to a better place.

I also completely relate to how different it is when you get on a horse that makes you feel safe and confident compared to one that just doesn't. I wouldn't blame you at all for wanting to ride a horse that gives you those feelings of safety. And if Dylan isn't that, it's ok to find him a new person who enjoys riding him. After you both spend some time together with your trainer, I bet you'll have a clearer sense of the right path for the future.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

egrogan said:


> I completely understand how awful it can be to deal with that blind panic- my oldest mare Isabel is the same (and the reason I have three horses, including two who are retired!). Fortunately she's tiny, basically a pony sized horse, so while she is still dangerous when she panics, she's small enough that I can handle her and stay safe. And at this point, I'm able to accommodate her need to always be kept with another horse, so we manage.
> 
> While I know you're having a lot of challenges at once, from the outside looking in, it actually sounds like a great opportunity once you get through this rough patch. You know your horse well enough to know what he needs and what is difficult for him to handle. And you are taking the steps to get him into a better situation, with a trainer you personally like, who seems ready to meet him where he is. It might be a stressful month now, but hopefully it will be worth it to get him to a better place.
> 
> I also completely relate to how different it is when you get on a horse that makes you feel safe and confident compared to one that just doesn't. I wouldn't blame you at all for wanting to ride a horse that gives you those feelings of safety. And if Dylan isn't that, it's ok to find him a new person who enjoys riding him. After you both spend some time together with your trainer, I bet you'll have a clearer sense of the right path for the future.


I will say I handled his panic much better this time than I would have a year or two ago. I wasn't scared, I understood what was happening and why, and I knew what I had to do to get us both to safety. I could have attempted to refocus him, but I thought the best way to handle it at that moment was just to get him turned loose so he didn't hurt himself or me. 

I am excited about going to a "real" facility again. I never thought I would say that. It seems like there's always someone there to help or offer advice, he's calmer because there are horses around, I enjoy arena work (especially dressage), and I like lessons on other horses but I LOVE lessons on my horse. And honestly, in that type of situation, I feel perfectly safe and happy on him. I do eventually need to move him home, we bought land specifically for that purpose after all, but I'm going to prioritize an arena so we can both enjoy riding together. The only thing I can see being a problem is wanting lessons but not being comfortable taking him off property to do them, but I guess we will cross that bridge when we get there.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

This is not a good picture of me. But it's one of my absolute favorites. We were doing a dressage clinic with a really wonderful clinician who focuses on relaxation and allowing the horse to stretch and move freely vs putting them in a frame. She starts on the ground, on the lunge, teaching the horse to stretch down and carry themselves well to build topline and balance. We did 3 clinics with her last year, this was the final one and the only one I was riding. I just love the way he's focused, on me, on what we're asking, on moving correctly. He obviously wasn't trained to be balanced or anything, he's very much a point and shoot type of horse and used to go with his head straight up in the air, but when I look at this picture, I am transported back to this lesson and how hard he tries to do what I ask, when he's in a safe and comfortable place.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

When I went to feed Dylan last night, my friend's boyfriend immediately told me they were going to move him AGAIN into another field, away from his pasture mate, with the boyfriend's gelding. Those two do well together, I actually had wanted to buy that gelding when he came back but they bought him out from under me, but it's the principle of the matter. Also I've told her multiple times I would like him to be in the field right next to the barn if they sold her mare and he needed to be moved, but that field is clear on the other side of the farm.  I told him all of this moving around is starting to effect him in a negative way, he is not the type of horse that can deal well with all of these changes. The boyfriend is the type that thinks the horse should just do whatever you say and have no emotion or reaction to anything, basically. Sorry, but I agree with Dylan! If my home life is constantly chaos, I am stressed and worried and get no relaxation. He said this would be the last move (HA! I'll believe that when I see it) and I went ahead and told him probably not, because I'm looking into moving him, anyway. I wasn't planning to tell them until I had signed the board contracts, but it got away from me. I also was nervous to tell my friend, but she said she understands, and I have to go where we are happy. She said if what I want is an arena horse, then I should keep him, but I won't be bringing him back there because she has no plans to build the arena like she said she would. So, I guess that's decided. I'm waiting on the contracts from the new place to sign, and then I'll have to figure out how to transport him.


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

boatagor said:


> then I'll have to figure out how to transport him.


You're not anywhere near me, are you? (central Texas). I really feel for what you're going through and I could give him a ride.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

ACinATX said:


> You're not anywhere near me, are you? (central Texas). I really feel for what you're going through and I could give him a ride.


I really appreciate that! I'm in VA, though. I might be able to borrow the friend's trailer and have my husband haul him. We have a truck that we bought specifically for that purpose, but haven't gotten the trailer yet, and I'm terrified to pull one anyway!


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

boatagor said:


> We have a truck that we bought specifically for that purpose, but haven't gotten the trailer yet, and I'm terrified to pull one anyway!


I was terrified at first, too! I think a lot of us were. I just took it super, super slowly. I hauled that trailer around empty for quite some time LOL.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

ACinATX said:


> I was terrified at first, too! I think a lot of us were. I just took it super, super slowly. I hauled that trailer around empty for quite some time LOL.


We're getting an ATV/side by side here in the next few weeks and I'm going to insist we get a little trailer to haul and start there  then I can move up to pulling our utility trailer with the truck and maybe by the time we get a horse trailer, I'll be more comfortable.


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

Yes! I started out by renting a tiny trailer from UHaul and driving that around for a few days.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I had a great lesson tonight! I decided not to continue at the therapy barn, because I didn't think I was going to progress at all there. So I went back to the barn where I'll likely be moving Dylan next month. I love it there, because I definitely feel like I've improved when I'm done. The few weeks at the therapy barn paid off though, because my posting was so much better for riding their more difficult horse. A couple of times the gelding I was riding started to speed up (last lesson he took off in a very quick trot on me a couple of times) and I was able to get him to a much smoother trot just using my voice and slowing my own movements. The instructor had me do posting-two point-posting trot transitions to help my position in the saddle (I tend to collapse when posting vs sitting down gently), and by the end I was really getting it. My legs hate me right now, though!

Dylan is a mess right now. His pasture mate went to her new home yesterday, and they have once again switched up the horses in the field next to his. I think they're going to leave him in his own field until I move him, so hopefully he has time to settle before another big change. When I went to feed him tonight, he was very agitated and was barely able to stand still long enough to eat his food before taking off. I hope he settles enough in a day or two that I can at least brush and love on him again. I likely won't attempt to ride until he's moved and the trainer has been on him. It breaks my heart to see how upset he is, and I can't wait to get our land ready so he can come home and not have to worry about this kind of thing again.


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

I wanted to like your post after the first paragraph, but after the second paragraph I wanted to put a frowny face on it. At least it seems like hopefully nothing else will change for him before the move. I agree it sounds like all of the switching horses has been really bad for him. I hope he likes the new place!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

ACinATX said:


> I wanted to like your post after the first paragraph, but after the second paragraph I wanted to put a frowny face on it. At least it seems like hopefully nothing else will change for him before the move. I agree it sounds like all of the switching horses has been really bad for him. I hope he likes the new place!


I really wish he wasn't so affected by things like that. I don't know how to help him. The happiest he's been was at the dressage barn where he was in a group of 5-6 geldings. Even there, she had one come and leave during our time, and she would turn her gelding out with them in the seasons where he didn't need a grazing muzzle, but he was never upset by those changes. I don't know if it was the bigger herd size, or just the stability of it always being the same core group of horses. It seems like all of the change doesn't bother the other horses at all.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I attempted to ride Dylan tonight. I don't know why I thought it would go well. He was incredibly well behaved, but I just couldn't do it.

First, I had tack issues. The western saddle I had been borrowing is the only one that fits my friend's new pony. I said no problem, I will use my dressage saddle. But even with it very tight, it was slipping all over the place. I haven't used it since the fall. It was under his belly for a good while as he ran all over the place afterwards. I don't know if maybe the tree is broken or something. It could also be that he has lost some weight and now it doesn't fit. It was pretty expensive, even used, and I really love it, so I'll be bummed if it's unusable or doesn't fit now.

My friend offered to untack and let me borrow the western saddle. She had an old English saddle that she thought would fit her pony. It did, but we wrestled with it for quite a while to get the stirrup leathers on. We swapped them out and then as I was getting on, my leg got caught on a loose piece of silver or whatever it is on the back and I ripped my new favorite riding pants. Then the stirrups were so long I couldn't even reach them. At that point I was just over it. It was probably 30-40 minutes we were tacking up. Her boyfriend was arguing with his gelding the entire time and getting him irritated. It makes me so nervous when he does that. Every buckle we tried was stuck, every piece of tack just not working for some reason, overall it was disaster after disaster. Up until that point my day had been wonderful. It seems to be a pattern! So I told them, let's just go. I'll lead him behind you. I really don't care if I get on.

So we go walk around a bit and he's acting pretty spooky over all of the new things in the yard. They put up a little shed with a kayak next to it, the 4 wheeler was parked in a different spot, there were basketballs lying everywhere. We went around and I asked him to touch everything that was making him nervous. When he did, I gave him a treat. After the kayak, he let out a huge sigh and just completely relaxed. But I still didn't get on. 

My friend swapped saddles again and the boyfriend's daughter got on his gelding who, shocker, was a mess by this point and he couldn't handle him. We started off down the driveway, them riding, me leading. And honestly, I really enjoyed it. He was so relaxed and happy, even in areas where he normally is a basketcase. And because he was happy, so was I. We walked along behind them, me singing the whole time, him snatching random bites of the tall grass. It was so nice to spend time with him. I have tried hand walking him in places to acclimate him before but usually he's still so spooky it doesn't seem to work. I guess having the other horses around helped.

My friend insisted I ride her little pony. He's very cute and if bombproof is a thing, he's it. But I was still scared the entire time. I think this is proof that my issue is riding outside, and not that it's anything to do with Dylan. I'm perfectly fine riding a 16+ hand thoroughbred I've never met in an arena but am terrified to ride a 14 hand pony through the yard. To me, that's validation for not selling him. He's happy in an arena, I'm happy in an arena, to me that means we should go somewhere with an arena, lol. We're starting to clear our land in November, and I'm going to have them flatten me out a place for an arena once I see what it looks like cleared. If I have to feed more hay to have a safe place to ride, I think it's worth it.

I know they were irritated with me tonight, and the feeling is mutual. If I have to hear "you need to sell him and buy something else" one more time, I might scream. I'm really glad doing that worked out for my friend, but it's not what I want to do. I don't think a different horse is the answer for me personally. 

We are supposed to move Oct 8 or 9, I am hoping I can find him a ride that's not my friend. I have a lesson on Monday so I'm going to ask around at the barn then. My husband has been traveling for work so I haven't had a lesson in about 2 weeks. I'm really excited!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I meant to write about my lesson on Monday while it was still fresh in my mind, but things have been pretty hectic recently and I forgot. But it was great and I was very happy at the end. I feel like I'm improving so much each time. I think this is my 6th or 7th lesson on this horse, and we have gone from not even being able to make him walk to trotting figure 8s over poles for nearly the entire 45 minutes. My posting in this past lesson was a huge improvement and it finally felt natural vs something I had to really think about, so that freed my mind up for things like actually being able to steer him and look where I'm going lol. He was also super friendly with me, where he hasn't been in the past, so maybe he's not so annoyed with my riding anymore. I really can't wait to get Dylan moved out there and start working with him on these things, too. I'll probably continue with these beginner lessons for another month or two while the trainer works with him and then I'll transition to lessons on him with her instead of the beginner instructor I'm using now. That does make me sad because I really like her! But everyone I've talked to has had nothing but the highest praise for the trainer/owner so I'm also excited to work with her. I still need to find him a ride, but I'm hoping the new BO can recommend someone. My friend's boyfriend just makes me so nervous when he's around the horses and I am not sure how Dylan will come off of the trailer. I would prefer someone with a calming influence be there to help!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Well, the best laid plans...

I found out last week that the company I just started working for is being "restructured" which will leave me jobless. They're offering incentives to stay on through Q1 2023 to assist in the transition, but obviously I am worried about losing my job before then, or being unable to find one next year. The training/boarding costs increasing were already going to be stressful, and now I am just not sure if it's worth it. If I stay through Q1, the bonuses I get will be enough to completely finish out everything I need to keep him here. We can build a barn, arena, fencing, everything seeded, etc. That will fast track when I can have him here, and lessen the time I need to board him. I imagine I could have him home by this time next year, with setting up a track system and hay until the pastures grow in nicely. But that's moving him twice in one year, again. I know he needs a trainer, but I also know that moving him like that is going to exacerbate the problems. Now I'm wondering if I need to keep him there, only visit when my friend/her boyfriend aren't home, and find a trainer to come to us. But of course I can't control who else they bring in and out and that's stressful for him, as well. And if I leave before then for another opportunity, I won't get the bonuses, anyway. I am just really not sure what to do at this point.


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

I don't know either. I was in my mid 40's before I was able to keep my horse at my own place, and all I can tell you is that is as different as night and day. Yes, there are issues with keeping your horse by yourself, but the positives far outweigh the negatives. You are in for a rough patch, but there is nothing like having your horse at home. The future looks good.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

whisperbaby22 said:


> I don't know either. I was in my mid 40's before I was able to keep my horse at my own place, and all I can tell you is that is as different as night and day. Yes, there are issues with keeping your horse by yourself, but the positives far outweigh the negatives. You are in for a rough patch, but there is nothing like having your horse at home. The future looks good.


I really can't wait to have him here! I just don't really know what to do in the meantime


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

OK, look at it this way. If you move him now, he will go to a new place. That's a change. Then eventually he will come home. That's another change. So that's two changes.

But if you keep him where he is now, it sounds like every week is a change: new pasture, new herdmates, new activities, etc.

So if you're looking to minimize change, I think I'd move him to the new place.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

ACinATX said:


> OK, look at it this way. If you move him now, he will go to a new place. That's a change. Then eventually he will come home. That's another change. So that's two changes.
> 
> But if you keep him where he is now, it sounds like every week is a change: new pasture, new herdmates, new activities, etc.
> 
> So if you're looking to minimize change, I think I'd move him to the new place.


That's a good point, too. I texted the new BO today to ask about just pushing moving him back a few weeks. I have a lot going on right now. She seems to be hard to get ahold of, which I don't love, so hopefully I hear back in the next few days.


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## knightrider (Jun 27, 2014)

I also was very nervous driving a horse trailer for the first time. The first time I hauled my horse somewhere, I drank a whole large glass of water down at once, my mouth was so dry. We had bought the trailer to move my horse from Texas to Maryland. Hurricane Agnes came along just when we started the trip. Agnes was a slow moving storm without much wind but heavy rain. Agnes and me driving the horse trailer crawled our way north. By the end of the trip, I was a fairly decent trailer hauler. We had a lot of scary adventures that trip, but it made a driver out of me.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

It's been hard to find time to get out and work with Dylan recently. My husband has been traveling a ton for work, my kids all have after school activities that end at different times, and we've had family in town. I found 30 minutes tonight to run out and give him a quick brush and spend a few quiet minutes with him. I brought him to the barn because he needs to get out of the field. There were lots of new things to spook at, so after he ate dinner and I gave him a nice brush, we went to play the touch game. I didn't get any pictures of him because I was just waiting for a rabbit to jump out and send him flying lol. But I got some pictures of the things we investigated. He really hated the tarp on the hay bales. He happily touched everything else with his nose, even the shooting target that was up on a hill and almost eye level for him, but he wouldn't actually touch the tarp, only my arm as my hand was touching it. I figured that was good enough. We also got down the scary alley of killer birds and bunnies (I added a picture of this as well) back to the field without any major spooks, which is a huge accomplishment. I am planning to get him out every day this week and hopefully practice loading as well.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I had a lesson last week that didn't go very well. I'm dealing with an old calf injury flaring up and couldn't get my heels down at all. We spent probably 30 minutes just trying to get my position in the saddle correct. Then she wanted me to work on my hands my holding the crop and the reins, which would have been great except the horse refused to move without the crop as incentive. I didn't go faster than a plod the whole time but I think working on my position is very important so I still feel good about it.

I had a great ride on Dylan today with my friend and her new pony. He spooked once while I was tacking up. It was pretty windy and the tarp on the hay bales blew up. He teleported 3 feet to the end of the rope and got stopped short. I laughed at him and he looked very embarrassed lol. We rode in the field and he was amazing. He did a small spook once, but it was literally the perfect reaction - he stopped, looked closely in the direction of whatever scared him, and then walked on. Today was such a perfect day, the weather and temperature were just right and we're getting some great fall foliage right now so the scenery was nice too. And I was reminded again how fun he is to ride. I like the horse I'm doing lessons on but I really can't wait for lessons on him again! I bet I will improve much quicker when I don't have to worry about keeping him moving.

I have another lesson tomorrow since I have the day off. I'm hoping the BO there will have found someone to haul him for me. I pushed back his arrival a few weeks but I am still moving him. I definitely think we would benefit from some professional help before I bring him home!

...and my friend changed the fields the horses were in again today while I was there. Lol. Doesn't affect Dylan though so I just shook my head.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I think I have made a different decision about what to do with Dylan. I say think because I'm notoriously awful at sticking to decisions lol. We are getting our land cleared next month. I think instead of moving him, I am going to get a sacrifice paddock set up with a temporary shelter and a track system in place and move him home. I will have to feed hay 100% for a while until my pastures grow in, but I think the track system will allow enough exercise on top of riding that he should be okay. I will have to buy another horse, most likely, but I was going to do that anyway. Paying for hay won't be any more than I would be paying for board, and I'm so tired of being unhappy with his situation. If nothing else, I can do a string around the yard and let them graze that down lol. If I get my arena done, the barn owner from the dressage place said she will come and help me with him, so that's lessons and training taken care of. Also I figure there are a lot of people who can't turn their horses out on grass because they don't have pastures and they get along just fine!

The barn I was moving him to wouldn't be perfect, either. The arena and getting lessons were a big draw, but at my last lesson I looked at it with a really critical eye and saw plenty that would grate on my nerves after a while. The arena is always filled with jumps and there's no other area to lunge or do groundwork. They have wire fencing in the pasture board paddocks but don't turn them on, so the horses are pushing them over and stretching them. Some of the barn kept horses bite your horse as you walk by. It's VERY busy. The trainer is incredibly hard to get in contact with. Etc etc. I know I'm being really picky but it's a lot of money to be unhappy, almost $1k a month! I could be spending that on hay 😂 maybe this won't be a good solution and I'll regret it but at this point, I just don't want to board anymore. The amount I would be paying is enough to do fencing and the temporary shelter over a few months. 

So, that's my decision for now. We will see how it goes lol. I'm thinking if we get the fencing done right after they clear everything, we might be able to get him here in a month or two! 

Here's a beautiful picture from last week of my daughter and Dylan. She is possibly even more excited than I am to have him here.


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

Wow what a wonderful picture.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

ACinATX said:


> Wow what a wonderful picture.


Thank you! I think I'm going to get it framed ❤


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

It's a lot of work, but having your horse at home is the best. Good luck to you.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

whisperbaby22 said:


> It's a lot of work, but having your horse at home is the best. Good luck to you.


I love the work! I'm a weirdo and look forward to things like chicken coop clean out day 😂


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## knightrider (Jun 27, 2014)

boatagor said:


> I love the work! I'm a weirdo and look forward to things like chicken coop clean out day 😂



Wow! I wish you lived closer and did that stuff at my house! I do not love it. Sometimes when I am wheelbarrowing dirt and rocks to the driveway or mending fence, I think how nice it might be to board. But like @whisperbaby22 said, it is the best, having your horse at home, worth the work. You get more moments like your beautiful photo.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

knightrider said:


> Wow! I wish you lived closer and did that stuff at my house! I do not love it. Sometimes when I am wheelbarrowing dirt and rocks to the driveway or mending fence, I think how nice it might be to board. But like @whisperbaby22 said, it is the best, having your horse at home, worth the work. You get more moments like your beautiful photo.


I love just about everything but mowing. I think I'd even like that if I got to ride the mower, but I'm always on trimmer duty because my husband is terribly allergic to poison ivy and I don't seem to be allergic at all.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

That hair though! I love it!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Knave said:


> That hair though! I love it!


Thank you! I think it's even more beautiful in person, this picture washes out the color a bit. She was bald until she was almost 2 so it's funny that she ended up with so much hair!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Dylan was super sore after his trim last week so other than going to brush and love on him, I haven't really done much. He's never been sore before, and he was actually pretty cranky during the trim, so I'm wondering if she was too rough or something. 

Progress has been made on clearing land for horses! They got a lot done last week, but it rained like crazy over the weekend so they need to let it dry up before working again. I'm very excited!

I also just had a disaster of a lesson tonight! It felt cursed. Nothing like horses to keep you humble. I felt like I was really making progress and clicking with the horse I've been riding, but tonight she wanted me to try out the other lesson horse. She told me he's a bit more forward than B, the usual gelding, but didn't have as many buttons. Apparently I found the missing buttons 😂 every time I asked for a trot he would give me 2-3 good strides and then pull the reins through my fingers and take off at a fast canter. He felt very nervous and spooky to me, and I told her it felt like any minute he would take off. Then there were several loud booms, like someone was shooting off a canon. He was increasingly worried going in the one corner of the arena, until it got to the point where she asked me to carefully walk him to her because he was one second from losing it. We got him a little calmer using walk half transitions, but then he suddenly lost all momentum. He kept stopping and wouldn't move. He threw it in reverse a few times, too, when I was asking for forward motion. I had the reins way up his neck, asking with my seat, legs and voice for him to go forward and he just wouldn't. Then some birds went flying through the arena making all kinds of loud calling noises. He went quickly from "not wanting to move" to "preparing to bolt" with that development. Finally we threw in the towel. I probably got 5 good minutes out of him the entire ride.

It's really funny because he reminded me so much of Dylan. Not just the taking off, but he felt similar in his movements and reactions to cues. Dylan used to do the backing up instead of going forward thing, too, and obviously he's taken off on me before. When this horse T gave me the few minutes of relaxation and connection, it was so similar to how Dylan feels in those same moments. Something about me apparently just makes horses want to bolt lol.

I won't lie and say I wasn't nervous at all after the taking off, because I was, but I rode through it even though I wanted to dismount. Last lesson I was doing stirrup-less trot work and this time I couldn't cue a trot without him running through my aids. Just really frustrating I guess.


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## egrogan (Jun 1, 2011)

Sometimes though it’s good when things go wrong with the professionals there, because then they can actually help you work through it. Sounds like it reinforced you know what to do when a horse is having a rough day  Doesn't make it fun, but it can be reassuring to know your instincts are right!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

egrogan said:


> Sometimes though it’s good when things go wrong with the professionals there, because then they can actually help you work through it. Sounds like it reinforced you know what to do when a horse is having a rough day  Doesn't make it fun, but it can be reassuring to know your instincts are right!


I often feel like I have no idea what I'm doing in these lessons lol. I grew up showing western pleasure, barrels, poles, etc and never had formal lessons. My friend's mom just stuck me on whatever horse they had free and would occasionally yell out some criticism of my riding. To now be taking lessons as an adult with years of habits ingrained in me, in a completely different discipline, with a woman who had worked in a fancy hunter show barn for most of her career...is interesting, to say the least lol. She's very nice and never mean about anything, but sometimes it does get exhausting to hear "no, don't put the reins over his head yet, fold that saddle pad this way, don't use that brush until you've used this one..." I don't mind any instructions she gives me in the saddle, though, because I know that I really do need to start at the beginning. After the lesson as we were untacking, I told her I felt like I was probably the cause of his issues and she said "well part of them, but you obviously know how to ride and were doing most things right so some of it is on him." It felt good to hear that I know how to ride at least a little, even if my hands aren't always right and my leg is out of position and I can never get the diagonal right the first time lol.

I like to visualize riding as I'm falling asleep, it's becoming my sheep counting on nights that my brain won't shut off. As I was visualizing my ride last night, I see where I went wrong in the beginning. I do tend to keep longer reins than necessary, and I've gotten used to continually squeezing in the trot to keep the other horse from stalling. So when I asked for the trot, I didn't pick up the contact and I asked him for more when I didn't need to, so I think that's why he kept taking off into that fast canter. Now I can be aware of those things in the next lesson.


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

I'm sure that if I ever took a lesson they would be horrified. Sure, do what they want you to do on your lessons, but what comes natural to you with your own horse.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I had a really great lesson tonight. I was back with the gelding I'm used to, B, and felt much more comfortable. It was dark again, we had birds flying, coyotes yipping, and sirens blaring at different points and he never did more than flick an ear. I really appreciate his steadiness, even if I wish he had a bit more pep.

Although, tonight he did! She had told me from the beginning that he's really sensitive to your seat and once I got that light enough, he would be happy to move out. I had several "aha!" moments in regards to my seat, position in the saddle, hands, and legs tonight, and I could really feel the difference in him. We had several stretches of a wonderful trot where he relaxed down into my hands, really moved out and felt very comfortable. He also had a nice working walk and a couple of times when I stopped him for us to discuss something, he was trying to keep going! I didn't think I would see the day lol. I also think he's starting to show some personality around me. At first he seemed very uninterested in anything, but the last couple of times he has been seeking out a scratch in certain places, or letting me know if he doesn't appreciate being scratched in others. Tonight I had been chewing gum, so I had very peppermint-y breath, and he put his nose right up by my face and sniiiiiifed lol. He also licked my sweaty hands when I was untacking him.

Work is mostly complete on clearing our land. It ended up being a much bigger space than I expected. I'm not sure if the pictures do it justice. And it was more heavily wooded than the workers were expecting, so unfortunately we went over budget already and they're not done. There's still some brush to clean up, the fire to finish, and grading to help prevent any erosion issues. Although it was stressful, we had an incredible amount of rain on Friday that caused flooding all over, including in our yard. But I think it was a blessing in disguise because we can see where the drainage issues are before they're done and can proactively fix them, rather than having a muddy mess after I have horses here. 

















I'm hoping they will be done this week so we can get started measuring, ordering fencing, figuring out exactly what we want for a shelter or barn, and fleshing out a more concrete timeline for getting Dylan home. I am hoping that it will be in January but it's going to heavily depend on the weather (and funds lol).

I have been semi-seriously looking for horses and I am going to a rescue on Friday to check out a couple there. It's not ideal to have to board two horses in two different places, but it's temporary and I really can't bring him here alone. I'm sure many horses would be fine without company but I don't know that he would. And my goats won't be born until March! I guess I could get a goat or two earlier if I can't find a horse, but I'm getting goats with good milk pedigrees from a very nice breeder and I don't want to compromise that. Apparently you have to be very careful with mixing goats from different places so I don't think that's ideal, either. I'm yet again stuck in a "wait and see" mode, which is the worst place for an obsessive planner like me!


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

I had milk goats. I enjoyed them. I enjoy the cow more to be honest though, although the cow was much more difficult to start. Now I had to cull Mama and have a heifer out of her to start in February.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Knave said:


> I had milk goats. I enjoyed them. I enjoy the cow more to be honest though, although the cow was much more difficult to start. Now I had to cull Mama and have a heifer out of her to start in February.


I was sorry to see you had to cull Mama. I'm sure that's unexpected with an animal kept for milk.

I actually don't even know if we will like the milk lol. I'm getting Nigerian dwarfs, which are supposed to have high butterfat and very good milk because of that. Only one person in the house drinks milk but we use it for cereal, coffee, and baking a lot. I'm very interested in cheese making, because I eat a ton of cheese, and maybe even soap making. I'm feeling pretty "homestead"-y these days lol. But I really like goats and figure if the milking doesn't work out, at least I have some cute pets.

My husband told me absolutely no cows before I even opened my mouth to say maybe we should get a mini milk cow lol.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

I liked the milk. The trick is to NEVER let a billy anywhere near your property, and to get it cold fast. Take the does somewhere to be bred, give them a bath when they return.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Knave said:


> I liked the milk. The trick is to NEVER let a billy anywhere near your property, and to get it cold fast. Take the does somewhere to be bred, give them a bath when they return.


Yes, that's my plan! Or AI. We actually live not too far from a top rated veterinary college/clinic, and they offer AI services. If I were hoping to make money on selling the babies, I would probably get a buck, but I've been doing a lot of reading about extended milking so that I have to breed less and think I'll go that route. The breeder is going to see about selling me a doe in milk with her babies so I can get started milking right away instead of having to breed.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

I never realized when I had the goats how much money you actually get at auction for the kids! It was like $300! That doesn’t seem like much, but it pays for a lot of grain.

They also aren’t long term like calves. They wean pretty quick, and it’s nice if you don’t want to milk you don’t have to while they are there. Eunice made me 2 gallons a day! So, I took one and let the kids use the other, and it was nice when I didn’t want to milk. Yet, they are gone pretty quick too. Super easy babies in my opinion.

I extended milked Mama the last year, and it wasn’t great.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Well bred, registered NDs here go for 2-3 times that. I picked the breeding pairs with the lowest cost babies at the breeder I chose. Lol. I contacted another breeder that wanted $1,200 per doeling! They sell in less than a day when they're posted on Craigslist, even without being registered or good milk lines. I've heard auction and Craigslist goats can be risky though, there are several diseases that can wipe out a herd and make it unsafe to have other ruminants for a few years so I wanted to make sure I'm getting healthy, tested stock.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

Wow! I was impressed with the $300/cut goat (what is that called) average at the meat auction. Lol.

When I had the goats I was given the milkers, and in return I gave away each female I had to anyone who intended to milk them. We live in the kind of community that works together in that manner. It also was pre covid, and goat milk is not a popular milk around here.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I think goats and goat milk products, especially soap, have become trendy. Lots of people getting them that probably shouldn't, and it's driving the price up!

My boss told me today though that goat milk soap is the only thing that doesn't flare up her skin conditions, so maybe there's a reason it got so popular! And now I have my first soap customer 😂


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

My aunt makes and sells soaps, and when I had the goats she would always take some milk to make soap for a certain customer with the same issue. She used/uses her own cow for the other products. I absolutely love her soap products.


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## egrogan (Jun 1, 2011)

A farm here makes THE BEST caramel from their goat milk: Big Picture Farm 
Everyone I give gifts to gets some for Christmas!

Hugh’s dad and little sister are working dogs on a goat farm. They do cheese, yogurt, and milk and do really well selling online and at the farmers market. Ice House Farm Vermont Goat Dairy


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I may have to order some of those caramels. I would love to make money off of the goats and have a little farm business but I know it's pretty tough to get started. We will see what happens though!


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## knightrider (Jun 27, 2014)

Knave said:


> The trick is to NEVER let a billy anywhere near your property, and to get it cold fast. Take the does somewhere to be bred, give them a bath when they return.


Is that why I hated goat's milk growing up? I don't think my granddaddy did either of those things.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I listen to a goat podcast and the consensus seems to be that you need to clean the udders well before every milking, and the first few squirts should be thrown away. Otherwise the milk will have a "goaty" taste, which I guess is caused by bacteria. I'm sure getting it cold quickly helps with the amount of bacteria and therefore improves the taste. Apparently store bought goat milk tends to taste goaty, the huge dairies supplying it probably don't care much about taking those steps.

Billy goats are super gross. They like to pee all over themselves, then rub on everything they can. I think they will pee on the does, too. So if you have a billy in with the does, he will always be peeing and rubbing on them and they will stink, too. Probably helps dirty the udders, as well. You can buy "aprons" that they wear so the pee doesn't get all over the place but if they're not properly fitted they don't work, and they can team up and remove them ( like horses and grazing muzzles lol). If you have billies, you can smell them from a mile away. My husband is very patient with my farm goals, but I think a stinky, pee covered goat that is always looking to get busy may push past his limits 

Edit: I actually don't know if they are always peeing or if that's just when the does are in heat, but I don't want to find out lol.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

Probably @knightrider. I have always heard the billies cause that goatiness. They are disgusting creatures for sure, but they make me laugh. I also think they are handsome in a way, but I’d never want one on my place.

I think getting rid of the first few squirts to the cats is just good milking practices on any animal, because I do agree that is where bacteria resides. Also, cleaning the bag seems evident. Yet, I will say with the goats I shaved their bags, and the cow does not require that.

Where my husband grew up in his later years, on the ranch now owned by his mother and brother since my father-in-law’s passing several years ago, was once a place that goats were raised. I am talking years prior to my father-in-law’s purchase, and I didn’t get together with my husband until they had been on the place a few years. The smell of goats I think is gone now, in most places, but some say you can still smell it.


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## knightrider (Jun 27, 2014)

boatagor said:


> Billy goats are super gross.


No kidding!!!!! I took care of some for about 6 years and figured out why dirty old men are called "old goats".


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

Oh, on maybe a helpful note, I cut the goats at three days old. I think even a small billy can effect the milk.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I am planning on 2 doelings and a wether, so hopefully he's not smelly. Although if she agrees to sell a nanny in milk, I guess it'll be 3 does and a wether. Hopefully I'm not in over my head!


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

That’s the word! How did I go and forget it?! Why buy the wether?

ETA- my wethers never smelled at all. I believe it is partly required they be cut early (also is a lot easier on them). I didn’t have any troubles that way though. I actually really enjoyed the wethers. They seemed more pleasant to be around in general. I just had no use for them myself.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I don't know, I just feel like animals are better in odd numbers and didn't feel like I could commit to milking more than 2. I read that recommendation when I first started out with chickens, someone said if you get an even number, they will all buddy up and you won't have any that attach to you. I guess it just stayed with me lol. If something happens to one or it's sick and needs to be quarantined or I need to take one out of the pen, I won't have one lonely. I feel like it's probably good practice for horses too but I don't know if I can support 3 here. Hopefully the horses and goats all become friendly and no one ever has to be alone!

I would love 3 dogs but that's definitely a no lol.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

I like that thought!


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## egrogan (Jun 1, 2011)

@boatagor, I found some pictures from when Hugh went to visit the goats at his dad’s farm. That’s his little sister’s butt in the first pic  I think it’s safe to say he enjoyed himself!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I love it! I'm a little apprehensive of my dog and the goats. I'm hoping they will understand he's trying to play and maybe run around with him. The chickens don't appreciate it when he comes barreling through and scatters the flock 😂 He actually had a stand off with one of the roosters a few weeks ago after pulling that move. We're definitely going to have to do some training with the goats and horses when they're here!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I had what I thought was an okay lesson tonight. I was back on the gelding that tried to take off on me, T. She warned me that he had been a butt for a kid lesson and also when she got on to ride him after. We focused first on my position in the saddle. I had been practicing my position all week when I was sitting down, at least from the waist up lol. She apparently had done some research on how to get my leg back far enough, so we lifted them up, rolled my thighs and let gravity pull my leg down. Instant cramps! She said good, that means it's working 😂 The first half we just walked, concentrating on keeping my seat light, shoulders back, legs in the right place, fingers closed and thumbs up. It was all great at a walk. Of course once she had me start trotting it all fell apart, especially because he was really testing me. He kept pulling me forward in the saddle, so I would lift my hands and sit back in defense, then he would halt because that's basically what I was asking for. She really kept harping on my hands and arms and I just couldn't get them to cooperate. I was a bit frustrated by the end.

When she asked how I felt it went, I said I was happy he hadn't tried to take off with me, but I was upset that I can't seem to have two good lessons in a row. She asked why I thought it was a bad lesson and I explained that I was frustrated with my hands. She said tonight was the first time I looked like I was riding the correct discipline. That she never once had to remind me about my seat being light and I didn't lose my balance backwards like usual. And she felt like he didn't try to take off because of how much better I rode tonight. I guess I should remind myself that no one is as hard on me as I am on myself. I've ridden the same way for many, many years and it's going to take time to train my body and mind to ride a different way. I don't think there's anything wrong with the way I rode before, and I'm sure when I'm not in lessons I will revert in some ways, but I appreciate learning new ways to do things and think more experiences will just make me better all around.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

On Friday, I traveled a couple of hours away to check out a little mare at a kill pen rescue. She's 8 years old, registered, and 14.3h. She was easy to handle, groom, and saddle, didn't mind leaving the other horses, and behaved well when I rode her. Her feet were in need of a trim and she was reluctant to pick them up, although she didn't kick out or anything. Just refused to lift them for a while. Once I got her to pick up one, she didn't hesitate with the rest. I liked her, but I'm very worried about why she ended up in a kill pen. She is not showable for her breed due to color, and the woman mentioned she doesn't like babies, so maybe she was a failed mama. I like her enough to have set up a PPE, but it's a few weeks out because of work and holidays, and the rescue won't hold her. I am a bit on the side of, if it's meant to work out, it will. I am feeling some hesitancy and I'm not sure if that's because we weren't a good match, or because I'm anxious about how she ended up in a kill pen, or if it's because of the awful experience I had with Dylan after bringing him home. We will see what happens! 

They have one day of work left on my land, and then we just have to fence in the dry lot area they're creating, put down some sand, and get a temporary shelter up, so if the PPE goes well, I could have her here by Christmas. Funny story, my daughter asked me what I wanted as a present and I said, probably a new horse. My son, who's 9 and has a friend with parents separating, ran in and cried "did you say you're getting a DIVORCE for Christmas?" So we have been joking for weeks about my Divorce Horse. A few days ago, my daughter and I were walking the dogs and she said "you know, since you're not actually divorcing, you're really getting more of a Matrimony Pony." The dad jokes are strong with that one 😂


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

That is the funniest thing ever!


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## baysfordays (Oct 14, 2021)

That’s too funny!! 

Also- hope everything works out with that mare!! I always say, if it’s meant to be, it’ll happen, just like you said!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I had a GREAT lesson tonight. It's been raining for days here, so I expected it to be cancelled. The rain held out today, but the arena was a mess. They just had it resurfaced and new sand put in and I feel bad because the drainage is not what it was before. There were huge puddles and the sand itself was a sucking, sticky mess. I was riding B again, which made me happy. We started out not great. For some reason, the mud made him really forward, and at times he felt like he was going to jump straight up instead of trot. He was still listening to me, he just didn't like the footing. I don't know how, but I pushed my anxiety down and really focused on my body. Everything was amazing! I was posting without even thinking about it, my hands stayed down, I was able to control his rushing with just squeezing the reins, he was bending beautifully. I was able to trot him in 3 consecutive 20 meter circles without him losing his momentum or me losing my balance. I don't even know if we've gotten one full circle before! We've done bigger circles okay, but I am not very balanced on a smaller one, and it makes it harder to keep him moving. There were even times in those circles that he lost his balance and I helped him get it back. We worked in the other direction and I lost count of how many good circles we had, although they weren't as perfect as those 3. 

I did pass on the rescue mare. I just had a bad feeling I couldn't shake. 

I looked at a little gelding locally this week, and I'm having a vet check next week on him. He is super freaking cute, has a lot of trail experience, has been on the huge Myrtle Beach ride (over 1k horses and riders this year) and seems very friendly and loving. He is very young, and a little green, which makes me nervous, but also excited at the thought of an almost blank canvas. When I rode he did have a couple minutes of testing me to see if he could get away with anything. Really, it was very mild. He would stop or turn when I didn't ask for it, or turn the wrong way, just little things. But I'm not kidding when I say I literally felt him go "oh, okay, you're the boss." His whole body just _relaxed_ and he did everything I asked after that. I really appreciate that he seems very extroverted with his feelings. I think Dylan is a bit of an introvert, and that makes it hard to know when he's let go of his "rabbits." This little gelding seems like a pretty solid guy. His default for if he's unsure seemed to be just stopping, and I'll take that over bolting any day! He did "spook" at one point when some gravel clanged against a trailer, but his spook was a few skittery strides and then he was perfectly fine. Not even a snort lol. After I rode, we stood around talking and he stood happily untied next to me while I rubbed his mane. 

If I'm honest, I'm already half in love with him, which I think is a bad place to be when horse shopping...but again, we will see what happens!

Dylan has enjoyed being half retired the last few months I think, but he seems stiff recently so I know I need to get him back into some type of work. He's going to be 16 this coming year! I'm going to go out in the mornings from now on, cold or not, and at least hand walk him. I think it'll take a few sessions, but I would love to have him comfortable walking down to the big hay field so I can lunge him. It's not perfectly flat, and I think the hills will help build him up so he's not so stiff. 

I did go out this morning. I brushed him and treated his feet (thrush is looking bad again in the fronts with all the rain) and then we walked down the driveway towards the field. I honestly don't know what it is about this section of the driveway but literally all of the horses are terrified of it. So we really only got probably 15 feet past the gate, and that was with backing up and turning and walking the opposite direction and turning again, but it's something and I'm not going to beat myself up over it.


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## baysfordays (Oct 14, 2021)

Sounds like you had an awesome lesson!!
It’s been raining here too a lot so my ‘arena’ was a mud hole, actually my gelding did the SAME thing, he popped up from the footing and was really forward, sadly my trainer thought he was trying to rear or be bad so she got real mad at him but in all honesty, the footing was soo bad here that his hind end went down so he had to pop up and go fast so he wouldn’t like fall backwards, anyway, I was just exciting reading that because it proves my trainer wrong.

The little gelding sounds like a fun possibility!! I fall in love with every horse I look at to buy so it’s a constant struggle.. I hope he works out for you! Also a myrtle beach ride sounds soooo fun, I went there for vacation years back and it was just a blast, I wish I could go again but it’s so far away!  
If he could handle the myrtle beach ride, then that’s impressive for a green little dude!!

I feel like there’s always that one spot where every horse is like “oh no I’m going to die” when there is literally nothing there lol.

I love reading your journal!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Oh, also there was a young girl taking a lesson before I started and I sat down to watch her. She was riding a little Halflinger and that mare was FORWARD and could jump like nobody's business! I guess I've always heard they're very calm, steady horses so I really didn't expect to see her just rocketing over the jumps and fighting every time the girl tried to slow her down. I asked my instructor about her and she said she won't ride her because it's like being on a live wire lol.


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## baysfordays (Oct 14, 2021)

I love halflingers, they’re just so cute, I’ve always wanted one but I think I’m too tall for them.. I love their little jumps though! If I was short I would definitely buy one


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Oh, this one didn't have little jumps. She was flying! I was so surprised. And she was super stout. Just really incredible lol.


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

Just goes to show that the heart of the horse is more of an indication of how they will be than conformation. I hope the gelding works out for you!


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## gottatrot (Jan 9, 2011)

I hope you get the gelding!

Your post about having the instructor tell you horse handling things...that's the part of lessons I struggle with. The tack has to be put just so, and then I'm supposed to act like the super calm and benign lesson horse is going to flip out at any second.

I really do approve of safety rules, so it's funny how torn I am. My last lesson I was scolded for having the reins over the horse's head. Well, he was still in cross ties, was sleeping, and they didn't reach the ground. But I felt like a naughty 5 year old, lol.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

gottatrot said:


> I hope you get the gelding!
> 
> Your post about having the instructor tell you horse handling things...that's the part of lessons I struggle with. The tack has to be put just so, and then I'm supposed to act like the super calm and benign lesson horse is going to flip out at any second.
> 
> I really do approve of safety rules, so it's funny how torn I am. My last lesson I was scolded for having the reins over the horse's head. Well, he was still in cross ties, was sleeping, and they didn't reach the ground. But I felt like a naughty 5 year old, lol.


My last lesson she was much more casual about things. I know 99% of her students are beginners, and almost all of those are small children, so I totally understand. I don't even think she's aware of it! It just makes me feel awkward and I stand around like, okay, tell me the "right" way to do things, lol.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I went to see Dylan this morning. He seemed surprised to see me so early, and veeeery slowly made his way over lol. But once he got to me, he laid his head against my chest so I could kiss his forehead. I thought, how did I get so lucky to find the sweetest, most gentle horse on the planet? Then I lead him to the gate, where he did a nice big spook at a bird across the driveway  I took him to the barn to be groomed and put some hoof mud in his feet. The thrush was mostly cleared up, finally, but with all of the wet weather and the super deep mud he's standing in around the hay bale, they're not looking great again. I've started breaking the rules and giving him hay to eat while I mess with him. It keeps him from finding things to worry about and getting himself worked up.

I took him down the driveway to work again. Honestly, this is the part of dealing with him that I'm just not sure about. He was very worried about that section of the driveway. I was trying to get short bursts of relaxed walking, even just one or two steps, but he kept blowing past me with his head in the air, snorting and prancing. I would turn him back around, make him back up until his focus was on me, and then start forward again. It wasn't working. He was just too keyed up, and usually if I force it at that point, it turns into a fight. And I don't enjoy fighting. But I also feel like I will never get down the driveway if I don't fight a bit. 

I made him take two more nice steps forward, then lead him back to the field. I've been avoiding working him in there because his pasture mate is an attention hog and usually bugs us. But I guess seeing that Dylan was doing WORK and not just getting treats was a deterrent to that, because he stayed away lol. I took him down to the flat part and had him do some circles around me, yielding, stopping, and backing up. We also worked on "touch" with the end of the dressage whip. Then I put the lead rope around his neck and we walked around together. He stayed with me pretty well, and if he got too far away, he would turn so he was facing me. We just did turns, stops, backing up, and some jogging (me) and gaiting (him) together. We need to work on this some more, so he stays closer to me and stops next to me vs ahead and then turning to face me, but I'm happy that he's still willing to stay next to me with "no hands" lol. 

I don't know how much to push on the driveway thing. I see several options. I can continue to work on it slowly, and making little progress, and then working him where he's comfortable to finish out our sessions. Hopefully I can make it a little further each time (although I did not make forward progress today). I can push it a bit more, and likely get him worked up, but maybe make progress faster. This could also end up with him losing it and having even more worries. Or I can just ignore his anxiety, walk him down the driveway as nicely as I can, and get to the field to work there, so he can see that he will survive and nothing is going to get him. This option probably means allowing him to get away with some behaviors I don't like, such as the rushing, but I don't know if I'll ever make it the other two ways.


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## egrogan (Jun 1, 2011)

One thing that I did when Fizz and I were getting to know the road that leads away from the house was put a few little pans with some small treats (hay cubes, carrot pieces, whatever you use) spaced every few feet along the scary section. And then start to space them out a little farther over a couple of days. It starts off like a treasure hunt, so the scary place is interesting to them. And then you can slowly phase them out as they are comfortable and ready to focus on/work with you.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

@egrogan I always say I'm going to do this and then I never do. He is very food motivated and he is naturally curious. Usually after his brain comes back, he wants to go investigate whatever it was that frightened him. It's like his default setting is just "NOPE" and then he's like wait, maybe that wasn't so bad lol. I am going to stop putting it off and try it next time. Thanks for the reminder!


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

I suppose if it were me, I would try and just lead him down the driveway. That’s frustrating though. Since Cash ran me over I am even more distrustful of some horses on the ground. Yet, I think I would have to decide it was important to me and he would have to go. I do tend to be one who is willing to ignore a lot though too.

Although, even before Cash ran me over I have had a nervousness when horses are jerks on the ground. I’ve never liked it. Some people seem perfectly confident with a horse dancing around on their lead. Dancing I guess I can do, but I remember working on that horse ranch and the one horse I didn’t get along with, and how that horse struck at me the whole walk, and how I dreaded Tally days.

I was the only one I ever remember riding Tally. Tally and I came to a decent understanding when I was on his back, but he was much nicer to everyone else on the ground. Lol. I always felt like he was my arch nemesis, back at work there, but I guess I was the only person who could ride him, or would. I don’t know. I was low man on the totem pole.

So, I guess that is me. Even with Tally striking at me the whole way, I led him across the big yard and to the indoor to saddle. He also struck the barn wall the whole time I saddled, squealing and throwing his tantrum, and I of course had to paint the wall on occasion. Lol. I got his number on his back, but he had mine on the ground, and we both knew how it went. I’m kinda glad I don’t have Tally days anymore.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

It's such a hard thing because I used to ignore the behavior, and then it escalated to the point of being dangerous. But he also had ulcers and was at that awful boarding place where I think they were mistreating him, so I feel that played a big part in it. The BO of the dressage place said she personally wouldn't ignore it, and showed me how she handled it, which is the backing up to redirect his mind to me. She also said I should work to keep him thinking about me the whole time he is moving, and since he has horse ADHD, that's like a constant "hey, hey, hey" which gets tiring. I think the answer is somewhere in between and probably will even change day by day, lol. I will say most of the time, I'm not worried even when he's upset. He's careful to stay out of my way and not knock into me or anything. The dangerous behavior was rearing, and then striking (he only did this once but that was one time too many), and that does scare me. But I can control that as long as I can control his feet. He gives plenty of warning before going up so I can make sure to keep him moving so he doesn't have the chance. He hasn't reared in a very long time, but I would like to keep him below that threshold so that he doesn't get back into the habit.


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## egrogan (Jun 1, 2011)

Isabel is a horse I've always been much more comfortable with from the saddle, rather than on the ground, when she's having a freakout. She's tiny, but when she panics she loses any sense of people around her and is the only horse that's ever side-swiped me feet right out from under me and put me on the ground before I even knew what was happening.

It was a big adjustment for me to realize that with most other horses, handling them from the ground is often easier and safer during a tense situation. Even as an old lady now, I still have to watch her really carefully if she's nervous around something while being led.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

Oh, I get where you are coming from. I actually really like @egrogan ‘s idea of the treats. Why not?

That sounds like Cash @egrogan. We are pretty harsh with him on the ground, husband much more so than myself. Husband wacks him in the chest hard and backs him for every time he forgets someone is there. I will too, but not as often or as adamant. Ick.

I know it’s not just me though, because he’ll do it to the horses in the corral, brush outside, whatever is in his way he expects will move when he has a problem. I feel like he becomes pretty self centered about things. Lol

Yet, when he has a job he seems to focus on the job. He can control his nerves pretty well when he’s thinking “I have to pony this colt along, even though I’m worried about that,” or “that cow is looking out.” It the same way with a rider in general, for the most part. Yet, on the ground, he just doesn’t care much.

I blame the people who started him on the ground. I don’t know what someone does to create these issues, but I’m sure it goes with a certain personality type of horse.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I wonder if Cash is like that because he's so big? He knows things will move or he can squash them, lol.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

I always kinda figured that was an aspect of it for sure. I mean, really things do get out of his way. Lol


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

boatagor said:


> I've started breaking the rules and giving him hay to eat while I mess with him. It keeps him from finding things to worry about and getting himself worked up.


FWIW I always give them hay when I'm messing with them. Or at least almost always. It just makes things go easier, and why not combine feeding with work?


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

Me too @ACinATX.


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## baysfordays (Oct 14, 2021)

I too don’t know the exact approach to take when my horse spooks at a specific part of the driveway, my gelding is big and he knows that he could squash me in a minute, which kinda terrifies me, but he’s perfect on the ground if there’s nothing distracting him, so I do always have to get his attention back on me which annoys me because I’m constantly like “hellloo…come back to reality now!!”
I honestly just stood there when he was freaking out, and spoke calmly to him, probably wasn’t good though because he flew backwards, snorting, staring at something imaginary, then he kinda reared up and shot backwards and I really just stood there holding the end of the lead rope and was like “what’s wrong with you” and then he just stared at me like “soo why aren’t you running?”
I havent tried the treat or food thing because the moment my guy gets a treat, it’s like his metabolism works as fast as lightning and he’s like bouncing off the walls. 🙄

i use to feed hay whenever I tied my guy up because he was prone to pulling back and I didn’t want an accident, but then he learned he could get impatient when I would tie him and he wouldnt get hay, then I wouldn’t even tie him because he just was annoying, now he’s fine but I learned my lesson in giving hay when tying but it’s not like this for every horse!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I'm picking up my new pony Saturday 😀😀😀

She told me the other vet said 4.5-5, but this vet was sure he was a young 4. I am nervous about having a green horse, but he has a great head on his shoulders. Nothing seems to bother him. Today during the vet check, the mare and mule foal in the pen next to us were losing it. Running back and forth, snorting, bucking. No idea what had them upset. He barely flicked an ear. He didn't complain about any of the exam. He's very friendly and just wants to please. 

She noted a couple of minor things, that maybe could be a problem if I were going to have him in intense work like barrels or jumping, but I'm not so she said he should have no issues. She had the seller tack him up and trot him in a (very tiny) circle. I was very impressed with his ability to bend and hold himself up, with a rider even, on such a small circle. He didn't fall in or out at all. He may make a nice little dressage pony eventually!

I'm head over heels and also may have made a new friend! And I really liked the vet and she travels to my area and even knows right where I'm located, so I'm feeling like a Christmas miracle is happening over here 😂

don't mind the goofy hat I stole from my daughter, it's very warm lol


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## baysfordays (Oct 14, 2021)

He’s so cute!


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## egrogan (Jun 1, 2011)

So happy for you! Congrats!

Can’t wait until you can tell us all about him 🥰


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I've decided to "change" his name. Currently it's "King Charles" and I've had my heart set on my next horse being called George/Georgie. Well apparently the king's full name is Charles Phillip Arthur George. How perfect is that? I think we are meant to be 🥰


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## 4horses (Nov 26, 2012)

If Dylan is a bolter just be aware you may never get that out of him. My thoroughbred was a spin bolter. When she spooked she left town. This was an instinctual reaction and not something a million hours of training could ever eliminate. It was just her and her reaction to something jumping out at her (real or imagined). She was like that her entire life. Towards the end of life she was a great babysitter for little kids as she didn't spook in an arena... Her issues were primarily when ridden alone and something happened to scare her. 

If it's buddy sourness you can definitely work on that. If the bolting is more of an instinctual reaction then it will be difficult to eliminate. There are also horses who deliberately bolt to get away with something- usually because they learn to get their own way by bolting.

Just stay safe and be careful. Keep up the good work.

Congratulations on the new horse!


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## gottatrot (Jan 9, 2011)

I love the new guy!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

gottatrot said:


> I love the new guy!


I joined the "pony" club! He's right at 14 hands but he's very thick!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

4horses said:


> If Dylan is a bolter just be aware you may never get that out of him. My thoroughbred was a spin bolter. When she spooked she left town. This was an instinctual reaction and not something a million hours of training could ever eliminate. It was just her and her reaction to something jumping out at her (real or imagined). She was like that her entire life. Towards the end of life she was a great babysitter for little kids as she didn't spook in an arena... Her issues were primarily when ridden alone and something happened to scare her.
> 
> If it's buddy sourness you can definitely work on that. If the bolting is more of an instinctual reaction then it will be difficult to eliminate. There are also horses who deliberately bolt to get away with something- usually because they learn to get their own way by bolting.
> 
> ...


That's pretty much the conclusion I've come to. Bolting is his reaction to things that scare him. He can't control it. And he's also great in an arena and most of the time when we're with other horses. I'm happy with that! Although I do think continuing to work on his confidence will help a bit - maybe fewer things will scare him.


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## gottatrot (Jan 9, 2011)

boatagor said:


> That's pretty much the conclusion I've come to. Bolting is his reaction to things that scare him. He can't control it. And he's also great in an arena and most of the time when we're with other horses. I'm happy with that! Although I do think continuing to work on his confidence will help a bit - maybe fewer things will scare him.


Amore used to take off when she spooked, but after several years and a lot more confidence it diminished to a gallop in place, or maybe a stride or two forward. I always thought the gallop in place was a funny spook to ride. It was like, "Oops, we're running! Never mind." Or like we used to say in the '90s as kids, "Psych!"


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Georgie is at his (temporary) home! He loaded really well into the 2 horse straight load. He needed a few minutes to consider, but the seller didn't rush him and eventually he went right on. He traveled quietly, with just a little shuffling. No kicking or whinnying or anything. But, he wouldn't come off the trailer. I'm actually not sure if he's ever had to back off a trailer before, and he just seemed like he really didn't know what to do. My preference would have been to just hang out until he decided to come off, but my friend's boyfriend was there and he just had to get involved. (I had chosen today to bring him because he wasn't supposed to be around, but what can you do.) I really, really didn't want him to have a bad experience in the trailer so after a few minutes of trying various things, they removed the center divider and he was able to turn around and come off that way. Now I know the very first thing to work on!

I think a lot of horses would have been very nervous in that situation but he was calm. You could just tell he didn't know how to do what we were asking. He was a bit nervous once he was off, and spooked once, but calmed down immediately to graze. He didn't get anxious or rushy towards the other horses, wasn't yelling like an idiot, and still paid attention to what I was asking (Dylan should take notes lol). We turned him out individually next to Dylan and his pasture mate for tonight, and I'm going in the morning to move him in with them. When I originally got Dylan, the other gelding herded him around for 5 minutes and then they both went and rolled and have been best friends since. But that horse was sold and when he came back this year, he wasn't the same. They have had issues with him and some of the other horses so hopefully it's okay. Dylan likes everyone and I think Georgie will be the same way.

I'm really impressed with him so far! I really hope I don't mess him up lol.









On a different note, I am paying the deposit on our run in shed on Monday, then once I have a delivery date, I can schedule to get the gravel and footing delivered for the dry lot. I ordered fencing this week, too. I expect I should be able to bring them home next month some time! I probably won't have the track set up yet at that point, so I will have to make sure they're both getting adequate exercise, but I don't think I'll be able to wait to move them once I have somewhere for them to live here.


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

Will you be putting up pictures and commentary about the shed? I'm going to be in the same position in a year or so, and I'd love to know someone else's experiences first.

I keep reading his name as "Google" for some reason. Maybe I need less computer time...


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I think someone else has a journal going about a horse named Google, @ACinATX !

My husband really wanted to build the shed but we finally decided it was too big of a project. There are a lot of places that make them around here, so I just sent out some inquiries and went from there. I originally wanted a 12x24, but after corresponding with the one company, decided to go with a 10x20. We have a narrow alley between the house and a hillside that it will have to travel through, and he didn't think the 12 ft would fit. I think with the size of the two horses, a 10x20 will be fine. It's technically portable, so it's on skids and can be drug around. We are going to get the area as level as possible with the gravel we're putting down before they deliver. Then I will put down stall mats and shavings inside. The ones they make have a divider so you can turn it into two stalls, which is what made me choose them over a different company. I can definitely add pictures when they're delivering and everything! Here's the sample picture he sent me. We chose shades of brown to match our house.









I told my husband he can build me a tack shed and a goat house instead 😂


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I thought about starting a second journal for Georgie but I don't want to keep track of two, lol. So I'll just combine them.

My friend said Georgie has been enjoying himself, running and bucking around. He was easy to catch, although I had to go get him. Hopefully I can get him to come to me like Dylan does (I do give a cookie for haltering nicely, I think that helps lol). I noticed a couple very fresh poops and she saw him hanging around by the water trough, so I think he's eating and drinking okay. He stood nicely for grooming and let me throw a saddle on him to check the fit. I'm thinking it's got too much bar flare but I'm going to make a post for opinions. I didn't have a helper so the pictures weren't the best.

After I groomed him, I wanted to see if I could get him to walk to the big field. He was nervous going through the scary part of the driveway, but he still listened and never seemed panicked. I wonder what it is about that area that scares the horses so much! We got to the big field with no problems whatsoever and he was happy to graze on the nice grass there for several minutes. I checked periodically that he would listen if I asked him to stop grazing and move, and he did. While we were there, Dylan and the other gelding started losing it, galloping back and forth and bucking. The wind was picking up and with them going nuts, I thought it best to take him back. I wanted to take him far enough out that he couldn't see the others and see how he did, but I figure I'll save that for next time.









I love the roaning on his belly 😍. He is pretty chunky though. I couldn't feel any ribs. He doesn't seem to have any fat pads and his chest and hindquarters are both muscular so I don't think it's too bad. She was feeding him sweet and senior feed mixed, because that's what all of her other horses get, so I'll definitely be putting him on a ration balancer.

It was my intention to get Dylan out today, too, but I didn't feel like flying a horse sized kite so I passed. Lol. I tried to go in and knock some mud off at liberty but he wasn't interested. Here he is outraged that he didn't get a cookie. Sorry, you have to stand still for more than 2 seconds to earn a cookie!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

There was one bad moment with Georgie. As we were passing the other geldings, they took off running and he spooked and tried to go, too. He hit the end of the lead rope, circled around, and came back next to me. He was a little prancy, and he seems to want to come into your space when he's nervous, but otherwise he was very controllable. I'll have to work on the personal space thing. He's not big, so it doesn't feel too scary when he crowds me, but it's not something I want to become a habit, either.


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## gottatrot (Jan 9, 2011)

@ACinATX, @Amyrides has Google.


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

Thanks @gottatrot . But now in my mind they have merged together and are one horse called "Googie." Sorry @boatagor . But Georgie is a really cute horse and it sounds like you found a gem! 

Does anyone else feel like the pattern on his neck reminds them of a giraffe? Or is it still my brain doing weird stuff?


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## gottatrot (Jan 9, 2011)

QUOTE=ACinATX
"Does anyone else feel like the pattern on his neck reminds them of a giraffe? Or is it still my brain doing weird stuff?"

I see it too. 😆


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I agree with the giraffe comment lol 

He also has the lacing along his spine, I'll have to take a picture. I think the vet who pulled his coggins was an artist, the sketch was spot on lol.


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

I've heard various conjectures about areas that horses don't like, smell and electric current among others. I think that something bad happened there one time, and animals are more in tune with the universe and react to the incident. But that's just me.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

@whisperbaby22 the electric current could be it. I think there's a power line that runs parallel to the driveway there but can't remember for sure. It's heavy brush on both sides so it could also be a lot of small animals and things making noises and smells that we can't hear.

I took my daughter to meet Georgie today. She's been sick, and had stayed home from school today, but her fever broke late last night and she was feeling better so I said okay. We gave him a quick brushing and then took him for a walk. I wanted to go up by the house, which is where the trail access is. I've actually not been on the trails yet. I wanted him to get comfortable walking through there. We had to walk across a small bridge, go past a couple of horses, a fire pit, basketball hoop, several trailers, a carport, etc. He didn't care. Sometimes he would look sideways at something and snort, but that was the extent of it. Tomorrow I'm going to hand walk him on the trail and see how he does. His little ears are so cute. They swivel around like little satellite dishes when he's exploring. The seller said he likes to go "sightseeing" and I can definitely see that in his personality. He's interested in things, but not in a spooky way.









We also turned him out with Dylan and the other gelding, C. We have some bad weather coming (like most people) and wanted them to be somewhat settled before then. He was desperate to make friends, too. They chased him around a little bit and just when we thought things would be okay, they flanked him and C attempted to double barrel him. He ducked around and took off, with them behind. He came straight for me and swung behind me while I held back the other two. I chased them off and he waded back in after a minute. They tried to crowd him again and he threatened to kick a couple times, but they backed off after that. My friend held them off while I walked him over to make sure he knew where the water was. He followed right behind me as we walked back towards the gate. It took years before Dylan would follow me at liberty lol. My friend thought he had gotten kicked and was limping but I think he was fine and all of his legs were okay when I checked him over. He looks so tiny compared to them!









They seemed settled so we let the senior geldings out in the field next to them. They had spent a couple nights in the barn so Georgie could be turned out alone. They wanted to make friends with him over the fence, but Dylan was having none of it. He's odd with other horses I think. The only times I've seen him be a jerk is when the other gelding is younger and/or smaller. He was a total bully to the yearling at the dressage place, but the others really put him in his place. I think he only goes after horses he thinks are submissive. If the horse is obviously dominant, he knows he won't win and doesn't even try. C stepped in at this point, though. I left to run some errands since it didn't look like they were going to kill him, and when I came back, Georgie and C were cuddling near the fence and Dylan had been pushed to the outside. He didn't look happy, lol. I almost think it will be better if Georgie and Dylan aren't best friends, because maybe I won't have as many problems with herd bound behavior.

I got a good picture of his back markings and attempted conformation shots. My daughter was manning the camera and he didn't want to stand still so they're not great. He does toe out at the back a bit, but no one's perfect! I just think he's so cute 🥰

























I really wanted to ride today, but thought maybe he should have more time to settle. Although he seems like he's doing okay. I'm really nervous, because my first ride on Dylan was really awful. So I asked my friend if we could ride together the first time. I'm not sure when that's going to happen because of the holiday and the weather, but I'm going to continue pulling him out and working with him as the weather allows until then. Maybe before that I'll just decide to hop on, lol. I really think he would be just fine, but I don't want my nerves to affect him.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Well, my friend just called and said they ran Georgie through the fence. He's okay, and she put him in with the senior geldings for now. That would have been my preference, because C has been really difficult with all of the horses except Dylan. But the senior guys get several lbs of feed twice a day, and she's worried he will steal it. I may have to just agree to feed them in the morning and go out and work with him while they're eating, but I'm not sure what to do about evening feeds. I think they're planning on selling C, so it will probably only be temporary. I really think he and Dylan would be okay alone. There is only one other option for turnout and if it doesn't work, I guess I'll be looking for boarding for a few weeks.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Georgie ended up spending the night in a stall. The seniors were apparently very mean at the night feeding. He was perfectly fine in the barn on his own and happy to see me this morning. 

I hand walked him on the trail today, and he did awesome! We didn't go very far, because I've never been out there and I wasn't sure about property lines and things, but I really wanted to see how he would do on his own. He was alert and happy to go with me, and not spooky at all. He also didn't want to stand still for a picture, lol. It was all uphill so I was huffing and puffing (really need to get back to a running routine!) but he was fine. I was really tempted to march back to the barn and tack up, but my friend is traveling for work and I didn't want to be out there alone in the cold if something happened. He walked a little faster going back, but wasn't rushy about it. He wasn't a fan of stopping for pictures, he had places to be apparently 😂

















We took our time wandering around on the way back to the barn. He would take a couple bites, walk a couple of steps, have another bite. I tried as much as possible to "match" his steps with my own, which is a Warwick Schiller thing. Then I turned him out with the senior geldings. They largely ignored him. Sometimes he would get too close and the 30 year old would lunge at him, but at his age he can't do much and Georgie was quick to dart away. I think if that horse was 5 years younger he would be trouble lol.

It was my intention to pull Dylan out for grooming today but everyone was getting along and I didn't want to get them going, so I went in and gave him a good rub down while he ate some hay. I made sure to take my whip this time so I could keep C from stealing the attention. He can't stand another horse getting loved on when he isn't. 

The kids and I took the dogs for a walk tonight, so I got some pictures of our finished cleared area. It's basically mud out there right now and I have to give the dogs a bath every time we walk lol. I'm excited for spring when things start growing and the area is useable. The last picture is from the far corner and is the only one that captures almost the whole area. There is a little bit more to the right of where I was standing but not much.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

My phone helpfully tacked together this little panorama of the cleared space 😂


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

So I guess he didn't have any injuries from going through the fence? What kind of fence was it?


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Electric tape. That stuff snaps so easily! She's had deer snap it, too. I got electrobraid for my fences. It's not supposed to break very easily. But it does make me wonder what would happen if they fought or something and he couldn't escape through the fence.

He has a small scratch on his leg but that's it.


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## egrogan (Jun 1, 2011)

They did a nice job with the clearing!

Glad you had some nice trail time with Georgie.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

It's much bigger than it appeared when it was wooded!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

We all survived the bad weather. It warmed up enough today that I could remove their blankets without feeling badly. The wind chills were still close to zero until today. They probably didn't need them after Friday, but it just made me feel better lol. 

I hadn't gone out for a few days, so I ran over today on my lunch break to pull Georgie out. He was very clean thanks to the blanket, so I just gave him a quick brush and we walked down to the big field. We went all the way to the end, where you can't see the other horses, and I let him graze for a few minutes. He was fine the whole time until we walked back. He didn't want to go lol. He kept stopping and looking back at the field. Then after I turned him out, he just stood at the gate watching me morosely. I think he's really lonely! The seniors still don't really like him. I think he's probably like an annoying little brother lol.

I am going to ride this week. I'm 90% sure the one saddle will fit, even if it's not perfect, and the bit I ordered for him came in. I'm hoping my friend will ride with me Wednesday, and then once I have gotten the first ride in, I think I'll feel confident enough to ride alone. It's going to be beautiful here Friday, 60 and sunny, but my friend will be out of town. I'm not going to pass up such a beautiful riding day! 

I keep going back and forth on ordering a saddle. I really liked the one the seller used, a Circle Y flex tree, and it fit him well. They're more expensive than I expected though! I did find one place that would do a trade in for my spare dressage saddle, but they're only giving me half of what I was hoping to get. So I'm torn on what to do. I don't like borrowing tack so I need to get my mind made up and order one soon. I am trying to change as few things as possible with him for the first few months of riding since he's green, so I really want to use western tack so he's comfortable. Maybe that's stupid lol. I also will feel more secure myself I think in a western until we get to really know each other. 

Dylan doesn't seem to mind being a pasture pet right now, lol. He's so funny, I really think he likes his blanket. He seemed upset when I took it off today.

My run in shed is ordered, but he said the ground either needs to be frozen or the mud gone to deliver. I don't see either of those things happening in January! My fencing came in, and we can get the footing delivered in a few days, so we will be ready to move quickly once they can get it here.


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

Glad to hear that you may get your ride in. I've hesitated to post the past few days because it has been so hot out here I have not done anything with my poor horse, standing out there in his winter coat.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

@whisperbaby22 where are you that it's warm? I'm jealous but I won't hold it against you lol


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I rode Georgie for the first time since bringing him home today. The plan was to ride yesterday, but it didn't work out. I was borrowing a saddle, so I had to change the girth and move the stirrups and find a pad, then it looked a little too wide. I was going to throw on another pad but then when I tried the bridle on, it was too big. So I started trying to punch holes but I was having no luck. By that time, I was flustered and out of time for my "quick" ride so I had to just go home.

I had my husband poke holes in the bridle so I could use it today. It fit okay, but the browband is really close to his ears so I'm thinking I might need something else. I also used a different saddle that seemed to fit better, but not great. I ordered the same saddle the seller was using on him, which fit wonderfully and was very comfortable, and it'll be here tomorrow. Now I'm worried it won't fit because I ordered a wide tree and this one I used today is a regular tree. But I know the size and angles vary wildly with western saddles so I guess I'll just cross my fingers it's okay.

My friend's boyfriend D was test riding a horse today, too. So there was a lot of activity going on. I had a hard time catching him for the first time. The senior horses were running off with all of the commotion and he wanted to follow them. I had to get my friend to catch her horse and then I grabbed him. I really hope this is a fluke and is not going to be an ongoing issue because I hate a hard to catch horse. After I got him he was fine, though.

When I mounted up, there was a deer crashing through the brush next to us and he didn't care. She walked next to us for a few minutes and then let us go on our own. We walked up by the house where there are lots of "scary" obstacles: sheds, trailers, basketball hoops, basketballs, firepit, tarps, and vehicles. He did do some "questioning" at first, wanting to stop or turn the wrong way, but worked out of it quickly. He seems to respond better to leg cues than the reins, and needs some work on steering. We did a lot of circles around objects, figure 8s, stopping and starting, and turning around. He side-eyed a couple of things, but never felt like he was too worried about anything. 

Then D came off of the trail with the gelding he was test riding and he did get a bit anxious, trying to pull towards the horse. I hopped off and we stood around talking until he seemed calm, then I got back on. We decided to ride down the driveway to the big field. We had to go past Dylan and C, and they of course took off like idiots. Georgie broke into a trot at one point but came back down to a walk easily. He seemed more anxious in the big field than he did by all of the "scary" things. There was a lot of mounting and dismounting there, because he definitely was worried about the other horse leaving him. I'm not sure if that was the right thing to do but we both seemed to feel better with me on the ground lol. D was testing the gelding crossing the creek and we tried it, too. There was still some ice and that area had a concrete culvert not too far off the trail, so when we tried to cross and Georgie seemed like he might want to break in that direction instead, I just got off and lead him across. He kinda bolted across it one direction, but was very good going back the other direction. Then D wanted to trot a bit and we did, but he was doing it in the direction of home (and with the intention of going back) and I don't want to start that bad habit so I said I was going to walk again.

I got off before walking past the other horses. I'm glad, because he did bolt forward when they took off. We had to do some circles until he was calm enough to walk nicely. That's definitely something we will have to work on. When I bring him here, the one road I'm thinking we will do a lot of riding on is basically all horse properties. I think he will be okay, though. He seems to learn very quickly.

I'm really surprised, but I would say he rode significantly better alone than after we joined the other gelding. He was really worried about being left behind, and wanted to pay attention to where they were instead of paying attention to me. Since I'll be riding alone 99% of the time, I think this is a good thing. 

I'm glad to have this "milestone" over. Lol. My first ride at home with Dylan was an absolute disaster. I think he may have been stung, or poked with a stick or something, because he never acted like this again, but the first ride had lots of bucking and rearing and spinning. Alone, in the woods, at the bottom of a huge hill. Lol. It was terrifying and definitely made me anxious about the first ride with Georgie. But I think it went really great! I was more nervous when we were alone than I would have liked but he didn't seem to really pick up on it. Then he was more nervous after the other horse joined, but I was calmer so it seemed to balance out. 

It's going to be really gorgeous tomorrow, and I'm off, but my friend will be out of town so I'm not sure if I'll ride. My new saddle will be in, so I'll likely at least try that on and get everything adjusted. And then I think I'll take him for a long walk on the trail (leading lol) to continue getting him away from the other horses. The warm weather is going to continue through next week so I'm really hopeful that we can get a couple of rides in.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I also had a riding lesson today that was a bit of a disaster. Lol. Between the holidays and my instructor getting sick, it's been several weeks since my last one. I was also flustered because of a meeting that kept getting pushed later and later and ended up bleeding into my lesson time. It didn't help that she had me riding T, the lesson horse I don't really like.

It started out okay, with some walk and trotting, but she said my posting was back to being too big and my return to the saddle too heavy. I don't understand why I struggle with this so much! It's been 5+ months of lessons almost every week at this point and I still suck at it. She put me on the lunge, which was fine, but then she took away my reins and then also my stirrups. So I was trotting tiny circles with my arms straight out and no stirrups while trying to post, with the horse ducking all over the place trying to avoid work. Not fun! Finally she said I could trot on my own and then the "bolting" began. For some reason, any time I ask this horse to trot, he takes off into a very fast, uncontrolled canter. She said he's a horse with a lot of buttons (ex eventer) and I must be asking for it somehow. The first few times he was really out of control. He almost ran her down as she was trying to stop him. She told me to half halt and sit down and all of these things and I tried but he didn't listen to anything. The next few times he still took off into a canter, but it was more controlled and didn't feel like he was running off with me. Oddly, I found myself naturally going into two point during the canter. I have no idea why, because I've literally never ridden a canter that way, but that's just what my body decided to do. He felt less out of control that way than when I was "sitting down" trying to stop him. After watching us try the trot several times, she decided the problem is my reins are too long, so when he takes off quickly, I lean back to stop him and he takes it as a cue to go faster. I'm not sure that was true, because the next 3 times I kept my reins very short, my hands down, and my weight forward in the saddle (which she confirmed) and he still took off.

I think he's just a jerk. Lol.

It's also tough because I feel like the two lesson horses are so different. With B, I really have to work to get him moving and I don't with T, so I think I'm riding him the way I ride B and it's not meshing, if that makes sense. Like he doesn't need me to ride so forward but since I ride B 95% of the time, that's how I'm learning. I know frustration is just part of learning but I would like to leave most lessons that I'm paying good money for feeling good about myself. Lol. 

She said my lower leg was much more stable and my hands looked much better other than the few times he took off. I also think the taking off is probably helping my fears a bit. After the first time I really wasn't scared, just mad that he kept doing it even though I was riding the way I should be. And I'm apparently getting the right diagonal 99% of the time now so that's good. Trying to focus on the positive!


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## baysfordays (Oct 14, 2021)

Even though I’ve been riding since 8, after taking a break my posting is way too big and my lower leg is moving all around and my hands are all over the place.. finally finally I got it down again, I figured out I was using my feet to pushing off to post, but once I used my leg,thigh,knee, it made a HUGE difference! It’s crazy how that one little thing can mess up everything else, but my lower leg actually was still, and my hands were still and I was able to keep my upper body and core ..together?quiet? still? What’s the word? Lol, brain fart. 

anyway, loved reading this.


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

I've tried this with new riders and they say it helps. At the walk, look down and concentrate on one shoulder. Try posting at the walk just by moving your weight, then at the trot by going up when the shoulder moves forward and down when it moves back.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Thanks @whisperbaby22! We've definitely done that. I am able to post consistently, on the right diagonal, but continue to post too "much" where I rise too far out of the saddle and sit too heavily. I also lose my balance and fall backwards sometimes still.


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## pasomountain (Dec 19, 2018)

I mostly ride gaited horses now but back when I had my arab I posted just using my thigh muscles. Use your thighs to gently lift up and set down in rhythm with your horse--no way to over compensate and do "too much".


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I think I just need more practice still! These lesson horses are hard to keep in a trot, which is probably my lack of good riding lol, so I never feel like I get a chance to really get into the rhythm before they're stopping or walking. I did maybe 4 or 5 lessons a couple of years ago on a draft cross and she was easier to keep moving, and I feel like I wasn't struggling then like I am now. I'm excited to do some trot work with Georgie so I can work on it on my own.

I also think my stirrups are too short but she insists they're right. Lol. I might push that one a little next week, ask if I can try one hole longer. Getting used to short stirrups and short reins has been the hardest transition to English riding for me I think.


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## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

Yea, it is hard to get right when you are dealing with different saddles and horses. Another reason to get your horses home. I'm happy for you.


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

I've struggled with posting a lot. I wonder if this might help -- concentrate on using your muscles going down, not going up. Going up, try to let the horse's motion push your butt up. And then use your muscles to do a soft landing. Imagine that you aren't supposed to actually make contact with the saddle at all, like you should be stopping just a hair short of that.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

She always tells me to imagine there's a baby bird back that there I don't want to squash. I apparently love to kill baby birds though.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Georgie's saddle came today and it looks like it fits well. The seller had a really nice circle Y that fit him great and felt awesome for me, so I was looking for something similar. Used ones were barely less than new, though, and the online saddle place I've used before had a trade in program (and returns if they don't fit), plus they are very good at fitting through pictures so I went to them for a new Circle Y. They're giving me some money on my dressage saddle that I don't use that I've had a hard time selling so that helps to offset the price. Saddle shopping is something I figured I would like, but I actually hate it because of how stressful it is wondering if the saddle actually fits. I paid a lot for a new one but I think buying something I knew would fit took some of the stress out of it for me so now I can just be excited 🥰 

I was so nervous that it wouldn't fit, so I was trying to keep all of the plastic and bubble wrap on it just in case. Georgie was ALARMED by that, lol. He took a couple of sideways steps when I lugged it up there and then stopped. I stood next to him wondering if it was safe to leave or if I needed to remove the plastic. He turned and looked at me like "save me from this death trap" and figured if I walked away he would dump it, so I pulled it back off and removed all of the scary stuff. I need to figure out the rigging, it has the 3 way option and that was really confusing lol. The saddle sits up in the back but I believe that can be fixed with the correct rigging positions. It's a beautiful saddle!
















I wanted to take him for a walk on the trails, but all of the ice has finally melted and it was very, very muddy. We just walked around and hand grazed. He was a bit concerned about this downed tree but quickly got over it.
















I have found one weakness in his greatness: he is really awful about feed. I kinda noticed when we were trying to unload him and they brought in some grain. He really got agitated and tried to run through the chest bar and was tossing his head. He's in with 2 senior geldings and they get a ton of feed and she's been having problems with him. I'm feeding this weekend since they're out of town and figured I would just put him in a stall while I got everyone fed, but he tried to jump over the door! I turned him back out and then had to chase him away when I sat their buckets down, and then I caught him and just made him stand nicely while they finished. I will have to figure something else out for tomorrow.


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## gottatrot (Jan 9, 2011)

That is a nice looking saddle!


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## horselovinguy (Oct 1, 2013)

Sounds like your guy doesn't get "feed" or any where near the amount the seniors get...
And he is feed aggressive in part because of that...he wants more.

How about considering offering him a "hay stretcher" product?
It has protein and fiber not so much fat and some of daily needed included...
What it really is is a forage product that can be given as a forage replacement....
So if he is grazing, it would take the place of some of the busy food grazing is right now...
What it will do is give him chewing time and keep him occupied longer and hopefully slow some of that aggression he is exhibiting.
Be careful when feeding...food aggression escalates fast.
Hopefully when you get home this too shall pass when they are under your care and how-to-do done.

I agree, very nice saddle and wishes for many years of happy riding in it to come!!
🐴...


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

@horselovinguy he gets some ration balancer in the evening but it only takes a couple minutes to eat it. The seniors are getting 2-3 lbs of soaked feed each, twice a day. And they take forever to eat because they're working with barely any teeth lol. I'm going to try to tie him today with some hay and maybe bury a couple of treats in it for him to find. 

Monday C is going to a barn to be sold, so Georgie will be going in with Dylan. That will help because they get an equal amount of feed and Dylan is a very fast eater. I guess I will see how it goes, but I'm glad I got the run in shed with the divider so if I need to have separate feeding areas, I'm ready for that!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

Tying with hay was a success. Probably helped my daughter came and was loving on him lol. He didn't even look away from the hay when I gave them their buckets.

He is having some watery poop though. I imagine it's from all of the changes in hay. First he moved, then my friend switched hay sources this week (and it looks much lower quality to me). I used a probiotic a couple of years ago on Dylan for the same issue and it worked very well but I can't find it now. Going to have to do some research!


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I got to ride Georgie in my new saddle today. I absolutely LOVE it. It feels like it was custom made for me. And the leather is already so soft and supple and not squeaky at all. 

He was covered head to toe in concrete-like dried mud. I was short on time so I only groomed where the saddle would be, so I didn't take any pictures lol. I'm going to go out tomorrow and properly clean him up. We only rode for 20 minutes, but he was very good and I was really happy. My friend rode with her gelding too, and they were well matched, so I'm happy about that. We did a lot of turns and figure 8s and by the end he was turning much more smoothly. He really seems to catch on quickly. I was feeling a bit anxious about trotting after the recent lesson with the horse running out on me, and almost talked myself out of it, but at the end I did one little trot. I might have done more but he moved right into it as soon as I asked, and came back down easily too, so that soothed my anxiety a little. I'm going to work more on it next time. I really want to do ground poles but that might be a process because he is really freaked out by things on the ground lol.

Unfortunately, Dylan and Georgie hate each other. I'm hoping it improves but so far it's not good. My plan was to move them into the dry lot temporarily, and then open a track system shortly after, but if they're beating each other up all the time it's going to be difficult to handle. Georgie seems to be a very people oriented horse but doesn't seem to really get along with other horses. 

I had another meh lesson tonight. I was on the gelding I like better, but the arena was sloppy and he's hard to ride in that environment. We barely got any trotting in. I've actually been thinking about stopping the lessons. I really don't know if I'm making progress and I leave feeling frustrated 90% of the time. I think it might be something I could explore later, either having someone come to me after my arena is built or if I ever get the courage to haul a trailer (which I would need to buy lol) myself. I guess maybe I'm not enjoying riding these horses much, and I feel like I'd probably make better progress riding my own horses. I'm signed up through the end of the month but I'm not sure if I'll continue after that. I feel like I can practice on Georgie with the posting and trotting but the position she's encouraging me to use just feels so unnatural to me and I don't know if I can do it without someone constantly correcting me. 

Honestly now I just want to ride Georgie every day and I don't see a reason to go pay to ride other horses lol.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

It was a pretty nice day today, but I didn't get any horse time in. Instead, we started leveling a pad for the run in shelter. To me, a run in seemed easy because we could just have it delivered and boom, we're ready. My husband is very serious about building and doing things right, though, so he doesn't feel the same way. Lol. We spent a few hours marking everything out and making sure it was square. He uses geometry, in real life!









After everything was square, he went in and put some dimensions on to a computer program so he could figure out how to also make everything level. Then we went out and started digging down to lay the foundation. It's crazy how much your eyes play tricks on you. This area really seems level when you're standing there, but it actually has a slope of 17 inches over a 24 ft length. So we have quite a bit of work to do. We finished after getting these boards in and leveled.
 















It's supposed to rain tomorrow so I don't know how much we will get done. They are delivering some gravel for the pad this week, and we will have a tractor on trial ( a friend is a salesman and got one he thinks we will like for a trade) so I'm hopeful that we can have the pad done by the weekend. Then I have to figure out what footing we would like for the dry lot. Originally we had been thinking it would be a 50x50 area, but we have rearranged some things and now it's going to be about 40x80, which is a bit bigger. I'm also wondering if I really want an arena. I'm thinking we could just fence in the flattest area and still plant grass, and I could just ride in there if I didn't want to do trail work. I just feel like it's a ton of work and money and wonder if it would be much better than just riding in a pasture. I'm still turning it all around in my head but we definitely have time to decide.


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

You have lots of time to decide. To be quite honest, I feel like I get a lot done in an arena. Sure, I do fine here with my makeshift worked up area, and I accomplish most things at work, but I love having access to an arena by just riding to my parents’.


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## egrogan (Jun 1, 2011)

I think you're smart to really plan out the pad for the run-ins. I ended up going back after about a year and having them raised up several inches because water was pooling around them. And in the winter, when snow slid off the roof and piled in front of them, it would make the "ground" surface higher than the entry to the shed, and they'd track snow in. When snow melted, the sheds would flood. Getting them about a foot higher than ground level, with the ground sloping away from them, really solved those problems.


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## horselovinguy (Oct 1, 2013)

Quite a rise in elevation over a small distance....
I see ground level I think with the string....
So, are you going to go above grade on your shelter floor area when you are done with gravel, dirt and finishing materials?
If not...think about it....  
Amazing the settle that ground is going to do and elevating 6 - 8" above grade will assure you you have the drainage you want to have a dry inside....
Slightest of banking for a ramp is simple or not even needed at that small a step up...just remember your entry point if you are doing a 3-sided enclosed shelter needs to also be ground reinforced as walking in or out does compact and make a low spot for mud and ice to form.

We have a pole barn we placed on a pad 8" above grade....wish we had done 12" above now years later.
Ground settle and packed from the horses coming and going....it is a constant thing when we get heavy rain.
My husband is constantly "building up" to protect... 
If our poles were not set 4' in the ground we would raise the barn @egrogan for the same issues and we don't get snow, ground freeze or heave....just rain and saturated ground.
🐴...


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## Knave (Dec 16, 2015)

My cow barn was great, above the ground, but as I’ve cleaned and cleaned it (Mama refused to come out of it except for eating and milking.), it is now below ground level, and this year it is flooding on the warm days with snow melt. I think we’ll have to bring a load of gravel back in, but that makes it difficult to clean…


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I definitely have time to think about it @Knave! I think the cost is just really scaring me lol.

As far as building it up, I don't really know his whole plan and I probably won't until it's done. Lol. He's been doing a lot of research and when he gets into these things, he does them right. I trust that he will make it so that it's not flooding or anything. He's got a background in engineering so it's not just "YouTube" knowledge. He's done a ton of huge projects and they're always really nice and professional when he's finished. He doesn't cut corners or say "close enough" like I do, lol. He really wanted to build the shelter himself but just doesn't have time. He is going to build a little tack shed addition on it for me.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I went to see the boys on my lunch break. I didn't feel like riding, so I'm trying not to feel guilty about it. I am trying to stop feeling so guilty all the time as a new year's resolution. 

My plan was to bring both of them in but we all know how that goes. I got Georgie in and finished grooming 90% of the concrete like mud off. He still has some on his hind legs and his face because I could tell it was bothering him when I was trying to remove it. He really cracks me up. They had put down some fine gravel in the muddiest areas, including my favorite grooming spot. He saw the hay bin I use (Dylan is vicious with hay bags and putting it in a bin results in a lot less waste) and eagerly went forward, until he realized the ground was a different color there. He stopped dead, turned sideways and gingerly stepped on the gravel. He loves to sniff so he put his nose down and did all kinds of deep huffing sounds, while slooooooowly getting closer to the bin. Then he acted like he had never seen the bin before, bumping it with his nose and doing these little jumps each time. Then he realized it had hay in it, let out a big old snort and got down to eating. That was it. He's really so reasonable when he's unsure. Of course our walk back to the field was at a snail's pace. He really hates being turned back out lol.

I wanted to bring Dylan in too. It was windy and I was almost out of time and I didn't want to rush and have him pick up on my anxiety. I groomed him in the field instead. I was worried I wouldn't be able to with the other horses there, but it was mostly okay. Georgie kept creeping up on us, and Dylan wasn't a fan of that, but everyone behaved well. Just a lot of this happening 😂


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## ACinATX (Sep 12, 2018)

LOL that is a priceless picture.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I'm glad they're not trying to kill each other anymore, at least!


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## knightrider (Jun 27, 2014)

If they are the only two horses on your property, they will probably bond. If other horses are with them, it may take longer, but they still may bond. It took my two geldings about 6 years of hating each other, but now they eat from the same hay pile. They have two mares in with them, and they each had a mare girlfriend. That's why it took so long for them to become friends.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I'm still toying with the idea of maybe getting a very small pony. I only have the small run in shelter so that's holding me back, but I don't think Dylan will spend much time in it so it might be okay. I think he would be happier if he still had a buddy if I take Georgie away. It seems that Georgie doesn't care much one way or another about leaving other horses, but Dylan does tend to get super worked up. Of course I don't know what Georgie would do if he was left alone either. But for now the plan is just the two of them. There is another (new) gelding in with them now, and he and Georgie seem to be friendly but Dylan doesn't seem to like either one of them. When they got the new gelding, his best friend C left so I think he's missing him. They've been together off and on for the entire time I've owned Dylan.


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## egrogan (Jun 1, 2011)

All I will say is… what you’re thinking about is why I have three horses, but only ride one 😉


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

I went out and rode Georgie today on my own. I was only in the saddle for 15 minutes, and only the first 10 or so were good, but we worked for close to 30. I honestly think he was bored of riding circles and figure 8s in the yard. He kept pulling towards the trail, or down the driveway, or over towards the house like he just wanted to go _somewhere_. I keep thinking "I really need to work on his steering" but maybe that's something we can do in more interesting places. I got off but we still did circles and figure 8s so he wasn't just getting out of work. 

I think every interaction, and every ride with him, is healing me in a way I didn't realize I needed. I know that sounds cheesy. It's true, though. I didn't realize how bad my confidence had gotten, and I don't think it's just from the fall I took. I think it's a culmination of handling Dylan and his spooks and nervousness and bolting and wariness for years. I don't know where that leaves me as far as Dylan goes, but I'm incredibly glad to have found Georgie. 

It was a short ride but I don't mind. I think short rides are perfect right now because I don't have time to build up nerves. Dylan is always really good at first and then gets more nervous as the ride goes on, so I am used to that pattern as well. I plan to build up the length of the rides to break the cycle in my mind. We did some walk-trot-walk transitions and I could feel the nervousness about them on my end leaving with each one. He doesn't try to take off, but he is happy to move out when asked just with seat and voice cues. And he comes back to a walk or halt with seat as well. I think if I could take lessons on him, I would have absolutely no problems with posting, because he has a great, forward trot that gives good impulsion for posting, but is also not too choppy to sit instead. So I'm really wondering now how to make that happen. Lots of places if I had a trailer and didn't have a phobia of hauling it, lol. I may send out some inquiries. 

Here he is looking at me like "seriously, why are you torturing me?" Lol. Poor guy. Even in his frustration he didn't do anything worse than toss his head and plant his feet.


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## Slave2Ponies (May 25, 2013)

This is great! I love Georgie! You're doing great together!

When I got my new gelding a couple years ago we just did figure 8 and circles around the pasture for quite a few rides before I took him out solo on the trail. We also practiced the one rein stop, disengage hq and moved shoulder over. This was not only a confidence builder for us both, but established baseline communication. You gotta have some steering and stop established before anything else.

Yes, I think he got tired of it, but also...now we have those automatic go-to moves if he ever gets emotional.


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## boatagor (Jun 27, 2017)

He has a really great stop! I'm glad I don't have to work on that at all lol.

My friend said the trails are probably pretty muddy but she's willing to try to ride out with us tomorrow at lunch. Maybe if I do every other ride working on steering and things, he won't be so bored. I also thought maybe working in the big field will keep him more interested because we can work on bigger movements. I'm getting up my courage to ride down there alone, lol.

I'm also watching lots of videos on steering tonight 😂


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