# Needing Advice



## Alexmac156 (Jul 15, 2013)

Hi all -- 

I'm in need of some advice. As most of you know, I bought a horse about a month ago (site unseen -- I know.. mistake #1). He's everything I could want as far as personality, looks, temperament, ect goes. I had one riding accident with him about 2 weeks ago, and since then, have been taking it easy and concentrating on walk/trot. Today, I had my trainer ride him while I watched. I finally got the answers I needed. He's a lot greener than we all thought. He charges forward and runs in to the trot.. and he's not able to hold the canter for longer than a few strides. At first.. I thought it was because of my weight. My trainer is probably half my size.. so it's definitely not that. He wants to do the work... but he's just clueless on what exactly we're asking. 

On previous posts.. I read several people comment on get the horse that best suits you now.. not what he can be down the road. So this puts me in an awkward place. After spending years out of the saddle.. I may not be the best person to try to train him. Do I hold on to him, and hope that one day we can grow together and be able to have that nice ride that I dream of... or do I sell him, and look (and ride!) other horses that better suit me now?


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## TessaMay (Jul 26, 2013)

It's really going to have to be a personal decision. While I wouldn't have recommended buying him in the first place, it sounds like he is the kind of horse you really want, just not as trained as you need at the moment. I'm not sure how much too much he is for you at this point. If it's not that huge of a gap between you, I would say definitely keep him. If it's more of a gap, that is a harder decision. 

One solution I can think of, though it would depend on your situation, is to keep him in training and find a horse you can lease now that is more fit for your abilities. That way both you and he will be able to improve and the gap between your ability and his level of training will shrink together.


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## JustDressageIt (Oct 4, 2007)

Your choice, made easier by a few questions:
- do you have the money to put into trainers?
- do you have the time and patience to work with a trainer through these issues?
- do you want to wait a year of more to have the partner that you were hoping for?
- are you confident enough to work with this horse, with a trainer? 

Ultimately it is your call, 110%. I would say it may be best to sell unless you have the time and money to put into him.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## CLaPorte432 (Jan 3, 2012)

If your working with a trainer, I'd say give it some time.

perhaps your trainer can work with him for 30 days and then you can continue to work under her guidance to further his training.You'd be surprised what can be accomplished in just one month of consistent training.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Alexmac156 (Jul 15, 2013)

JustDressageIt said:


> Your choice, made easier by a few questions:
> - do you have the money to put into trainers?
> - do you have the time and patience to work with a trainer through these issues?
> - do you want to wait a year of more to have the partner that you were hoping for?
> ...


Thank you both for your replies. It breaks my heart to have to think about this.. Because I thought I bought the ultimate horse. He follows me around like a puppy dog. On lunge, and on the ground.. he's perfect with me. No one thought that he would be a different type of horse under saddle. Here are some answers to your questions. 

I would probably have some funds to put in to training.. but the type of training that he would require (2 lessons a week.. and a training ride once a week).. No I wouldn't have that type of funds. 

I have the time it would require.. and (I would hope) the patience. Although I can feel the frustration building every time I ride because I'm not able to accomplish what I want. 

I'm a little bit selfish.. and I'm even more impatient. I like instant results (don't we all). I'm willing to take the time it needs.. I just don't want a year to pass by, and still not be able to canter him, or enjoy my horse. 

I think that if I had the funds, and the trainer was willing to really work and understand me, I would be able to accomplish my goals. 

A part of me just feels bad if I let him go to someone else. It's not his fault. He wasn't trained.. so he doesn't know any better. And he also doesn't deserve to go from home to home. He should have a good solid environment where he can be comfortable and be loved.


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## Incitatus32 (Jan 5, 2013)

I think that if you have the resources to work with a trainer and you really feel he's the horse for you you should work with him. The market for horses is not good, so you might end up with him regardless of that. It'll be small steps at first if you decide to keep him; I've got a gelding who I haven't cantered in about two years due to his training being SLOW. But I love him regardless and keep pushing it. If he's really the right horse for you, the training will be more than worth it. Just remember that the more time and patience you put into him the better horse you will have. Hope everything works out!


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## JustDressageIt (Oct 4, 2007)

If you dint have the resources to get the training that you both need, chances are in a few months you will both be in a bad place. You disappointed in the lack of progress, and he perhaps having taken advantage of the situation and a bit spoiled as a result. 
My advice? Get a horse that you can work with confidently and comfortably. It sucks to see a nice horse go, but think of your life in two months to a year - where are you going to be? It won't be a Black Stallion or Flicka story, I'm sad to say. 
I have 20 years' experience under my belt, but am relying heavily on a trainer to help me through the first bit of the journey I'm taking with my 3 year old. I could stumble through on my own at this point, but why would I take that chance when I have the resource available to me? 
You will be much happier with a horse that is at your level - and I'm not saying "your level" in a bad way, or condescendingly at all, simply speaking from experience.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## beau159 (Oct 4, 2010)

Alexmac156 said:


> Thank you both for your replies. It breaks my heart to have to think about this.. Because I thought I bought the ultimate horse. He follows me around like a puppy dog. On lunge, and on the ground.. he's perfect with me. No one thought that he would be a different type of horse under saddle. Here are some answers to your questions.
> 
> I would probably have some funds to put in to training.. but the type of training that he would require (2 lessons a week.. and a training ride once a week).. No I wouldn't have that type of funds.
> 
> ...


Then it sounds like the BEST decision for you and the horse is to sell him and fine one that IS suitable for you at this time. No, it is not an easy decision to make. But we know that you do not have the sufficient funds to give him the training he needs (and deserves), and he's not at the level that you want _right now_ (can't canter him). There is absolutely no shame in realizing the rider and the horse are not a match. No shame at all.


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