# Am I over reacting?



## AnneGage (Oct 25, 2009)

BarnBum ... The barn owner, manager & trainer are the 'professionals'.They are operating businesses that provide a service to clients. You and your mother are the clients. You pay for the services of the 'professionals'. That means, they work for you. If your (and your horses') needs and expectations are not being met, you should do all the things you have done - ask about the feeding program, look out for your horses' welfare, look for another barn to move to. It sounds like you have given notice to the barn that you are moving your horses. You have done nothing wrong. In my humble opinion (as a barn owner, coach and trainer), the 'professionals' in your situation are the ones that are not acting professionally. You and your mother are looking out for your horses. Move on and don't look back.


----------



## stevenson (Sep 12, 2011)

Why let them goad you into a tizz? Was your contract for hay to be fed, if so, then get out and dont look back. 
IMPO .. you are still going to lease to the woman whose mouth started the problem? if so, you are probably just looking for more problems in the future


----------



## AlexS (Aug 9, 2010)

Just move and have nothing further to do with them, you don't have to be friends with everyone in your life.


----------



## FaceTheMusic (Dec 28, 2012)

I had a similar situation happen to me last year. There is a lot to the story and I'm not going to get into too much detail on here. It ended up being fine but the barn owners took me to court for "stealing", which I didn't. They didn't win the case either. The judge practically laughed them out of the court room. It was a complicated and stressful affair but I am now at a new barn where my I and my horses are happy.

Save yourself the stress and just move your horses now before things get any worse. Good luck!


----------



## DimSum (Mar 28, 2012)

AlexS said:


> Just move and have nothing further to do with them, you don't have to be friends with everyone in your life.


This. Reminds me of a saying my ol' granny was fond of...you don't have to accept every invitation to dance-or to fight. There is absolutely no reason to stay there if you feel your horses aren't being taken care of.


----------



## Wolfetrap (Jan 7, 2013)

Let's remember that you are PAYING for this treatment!! Their behavior is completely unacceptable! Leave and have nothing to do with them again. Don't burn bridges since the horse world is VERY small. But don't put up with that kind of treatment!!!! There are plenty of wonderful barns/trainers!!!


----------



## Celeste (Jul 3, 2011)

I think that the best thing to do in this kind of situation is to move the horses and then notify the barn. Even if you end up paying double board for a month during the move, you will avoid all kinds of conflict. The horses are not lying about how much they get to eat. If they lose too much weight, they are not being fed enough. 

People that take people's money and then don't feed enough hay have a weird sense of economy. They have lost a good boarder with two horses to save a small amount of hay. Well now they should have plenty of hay as well as two less stalls to clean.


----------



## hemms (Apr 18, 2012)

Barn owner, here. I take a lot of pride in the condition - physically and mentally - of our herd. It can be a balancing act, but in no way is anyone wanting in condition or pep! I'm leery of any professional getting defensive when care is brought up, most especially in a respectful manner. I am my dependents' champion and I feel more concern when anyone does not take that seriously, even if it may put my practices under the spotlight. 

Chin up, elbows up and good luck!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## Breezy2011 (Nov 23, 2012)

I am a boarder, I say, move on, don't look back also.

The place I board at isn't even a boarding barn, it is my moms friend who owns a cattle farm. They have 2 horses and now mine. They get hay 24/7 in the winter, and in the spring, and fall. Once the grass is gone in the summer, they get hay. They are over weight (except for mine! she is healthy)


----------



## LexusK (Jan 18, 2013)

Plain and simple - if you are not happy with how you AND your horses are being treated and taken care of, then it's time to move on. Good for you for taking the higher road and talking to the barn owners about the situation and trying to give them the benefit of the doubt and the opportunity to keep your business.

Don't feel guilty about what they said because you've paid them for a service in which you were not receiving in its entirety. It's their loss! I hope you and your horses will be happier at the new barn


----------



## Saddlebag (Jan 17, 2011)

For every door that closes, a new one opens.


----------



## BarnBum (Oct 23, 2009)

Thank you for all of your posts! I knew deep down I was doing the right thing but its nice to be validated 
We moved our FOUR (yeah that's gonna hurt them!) Horses to a different barn. The new barn is cheaper and closer to our house. I can afford to have each horse get a stall now! Its not as 'fancy' but who cares! My horses are getting fed now and they are so much happier. The barn manager is a true professional who listens to my concerns. We share an open dialogue and have similar horse care opinions. She agrees that two of our horses are too thin and is constantly putting hay in front of them. 
Moving was certainly the right thing to do. I even found a new leasee for my one horse and she's perfect for him! The dust certainly settled in a much better way than it was kicked up!


----------



## hemms (Apr 18, 2012)

Yay!!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


----------



## jillybean19 (Dec 23, 2011)

Did we happen to be at the same barn? Because I had almost the exact same thing happen to me.....

The owner and trainer and the boarders that were "in the club" all said my horse was an acceptable weight for my horse and that he was getting enough food. Apparently, I was the one riding all the weight off of him since I'm an endurance rider. However, NONE of the other endurance horses looked like this, and I hadn't even competed in my first ride yet.









After trying to raise my concerns and being repeatedly brushed off, I did pay double board for a month, moved the horses, and avoid the barn and its patrons when possible - the owner was asking around for a while afterward to try and find out info from people I knew that were still boarding there. She was quite terrible to them in fact....

Anyway, THIS is what my horse looked like at the end of the endurance season after competing in 4 LD's and 1 50-mile ride as well as all the conditioning it takes to get a horse there. He's put on more weight over the winter, too, and is quite handsome, ready for this year's season!


----------



## BarnBum (Oct 23, 2009)

jillybean19 said:


> Did we happen to be at the same barn? Because I had almost the exact same thing happen to me.....
> 
> The owner and trainer and the boarders that were "in the club" all said my horse was an acceptable weight for my horse and that he was getting enough food. Apparently, I was the one riding all the weight off of him since I'm an endurance rider. However, NONE of the other endurance horses looked like this, and I hadn't even competed in my first ride yet.
> 
> ...


Good lord! Your horse was FAR too skinny and his/her weight now is fabulous! That is one good looking horse, my dear! 

I've known LOTS of Endurance riders, many good friends, and none of their horses looked that thin. Even when they did intense rides and were in intense training. 

I'm so sorry you had to go through what I went through. Un-professionalism seems rampant these days. You are lucky to have such a wonderful horse who doesn't seem any worse for wear from his experiences.


----------



## BarnBum (Oct 23, 2009)

It never seems to end. 
The barn owners sent us an email stating we owed over $900 dollars. Right. When we confronted them on that they immediately backed off and said they would 'let it slide'. Really? Do you know ANY legitimate business owners that would let $900 slide? Unless they didn't have ANY legal standing, which they obviously don't. 

An issue I didn't mention, because it didn't seem to have any point, was my cat Odie. I brought him out to the barn because they had a mice in the feed room problem. He LOVED being out there and was doing a good job. Right before we left we were told the barn owners would only allow him to stay out there if they could adopt him. I was FURIOUS but I knew he was happier out there than he ever could be with us (hates being inside). So I let it slide. Tonight, they sent an email stating "you obviously don't care about the welfare of your animals as exampled by your leaving your cat here" 

WHAT?! I cried for hours about leaving Odie behind. HOURS. The decision made me sick, but I did what was best. 

They are lying, repeatedly, to our faces. Openly threatening us, "we know a lot of people in the Eventing community, you should remember that" and saying our horses came to them thin, which was a lie for 3 of them. The 4th I bought while boarding there, knowing he was too thin which I stated several times. I had EVERY intention to fatten him up, which I told them I wanted to do and they agreed. But he LOST more weight while being there. 

Needless to say tomorrow I will set foot ONE more time on that accursed land (no I am not being dramatic, I view that place as hell on earth now) to get my beloved cat Odie. I will adopt him out to another family if I have to, but he will not stay within those vile, rude, immature, lecherous, horrible, disgusting people hands. 

These people single handedly made me hate going out to the barn. I finally got that back and they did this.


----------



## FaceTheMusic (Dec 28, 2012)

BarnBum said:


> It never seems to end.
> The barn owners sent us an email stating we owed over $900 dollars. Right. When we confronted them on that they immediately backed off and said they would 'let it slide'. Really? Do you know ANY legitimate business owners that would let $900 slide? Unless they didn't have ANY legal standing, which they obviously don't.
> 
> An issue I didn't mention, because it didn't seem to have any point, was my cat Odie. I brought him out to the barn because they had a mice in the feed room problem. He LOVED being out there and was doing a good job. Right before we left we were told the barn owners would only allow him to stay out there if they could adopt him. I was FURIOUS but I knew he was happier out there than he ever could be with us (hates being inside). So I let it slide. Tonight, they sent an email stating "you obviously don't care about the welfare of your animals as exampled by your leaving your cat here"
> ...


It is a sad situation, but I know exactly how you feel. It is a shame that some "professional" horse people can act so immature. How they can be so rude and cruel to genuinely good people, I have no idea. I hope everything goes well when you go pick up your cat.


----------



## Celeste (Jul 3, 2011)

They felt that they couldn't afford to feed your horses hay. Well now they won't have that problem. They also won't have to worry about how to spend all their profit. 

I can't begin to understand the logic of running off paying boarders by underfeeding horses and being rude. All boarding facilities need to understand that you have to spend money to make money.


----------



## jillybean19 (Dec 23, 2011)

The trouble is when they make the argument that "everyone else's horses are doing fine" - however, my horse isn't "everyone else's horse" and is obviously not fine. If my horse needs more hay, he needs more hay. Period. However, this being the first time I'd owned a horse on my own and being young, I was made to feel like I didn't know what I was talking about.

I feel your pain with the whole after-math; to get out of there without any confrontation, I told the barn I was leaving due to financial issues and was moving them back to my dad's house. I was nervous about telling her the real reason I was moving and where I was taking them to because I'd already been made to feel like I was wrong and the barn I was moving my horse to was kind of a "rival" barn, so I was nervous about retailiation. When you don't have your own truck and trailer and have to make arrangements for other people to move your horse, it's easy to become a victim of retailiation when you're waiting to move your horses. She said I needed 30 days notice, so I gave it and paid the board for those next 30 days. However, there was no way I was going to leave my boys there any longer than I had to, so I moved them within a day or two.

The owner finally put two and two together and went after me through the friends that were still there, saying I didn't give her thirty days notice and moved my horses. However, she got a full month's board for two horses that weren't even there! She asked around about where I really was and ranted and raved to boarders that were still there - I new what was going on through them. She told them she would lay into me next time she saw me - I've taken care to avoid that. Thankfully, she never actually tried to contact me, but the drama continued for quite a while. Ugh.


----------



## Celeste (Jul 3, 2011)

Again, that is insane. Why would someone think that you want to do business with them if they try to belittle and intimidate you? Crazy.


----------



## BarnBum (Oct 23, 2009)

Celeste said:


> Again, that is insane. Why would someone think that you want to do business with them if they try to belittle and intimidate you? Crazy.


What we thought. It just shows their un-professionalism and immaturity.


----------



## FlyingHorse (Jan 8, 2013)

Sorry for your misfortunes. Did you get your cat back?


----------



## Hidalgo13 (Dec 24, 2010)

I hope you get your cat back without any further problems.


----------



## Phura (Dec 4, 2012)

I'm glad to hear that your horses are happier and sorry to hear about all the troubles for all of you including your cat. I am a particular person in general with the care of my kids and my animals. It has not won me any fans, but whether it was free or paid care I always expected the same level of care and always offered compensation whether accepted or not. I care for children and have taught preschool both in home and in traditional settings and the level of care I gave was the same whether paid or free. It frustrates me when my concerns for the children were less than those of the parents. Anyway...as a business owner of a couple times, I was raised with work ethic and customer service has always been important to me. It saddens me today how little that matters anymore and was quite the rude awakening at how uncommon it was in the horse community when I joined it. All the best to you!


----------

