# Dealing with a sensitive student?



## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

put him on a horse bareback, and don't let him use a curb bit. Be really encouraging. He might be getting pressure from the other side via grandpa and be stuck between the two of you, thus the crying.

I know it's hard for you to see someone riding a horse so out of balance, but the horse will survive. Put a snaffle on her to protect her mouth..
The minute you see him doing something even the tiniest bit right , point it out. Same as you would were you training a horse.
Hang in there!


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## Creampuff (Dec 1, 2010)

tinyliny said:


> put him on a horse bareback, and don't let him use a curb bit. Be really encouraging. He might be getting pressure from the other side via grandpa and be stuck between the two of you, thus the crying.
> 
> I know it's hard for you to see someone riding a horse so out of balance, but the horse will survive. Put a snaffle on her to protect her mouth..
> The minute you see him doing something even the tiniest bit right , point it out. Same as you would were you training a horse.
> Hang in there!



Thank you, Tiny! This specific horse has a snaffle bit (as opposed to a lot of the others who has a curb bit such as this one). He's mentioned to me before about how his grandfather will "down" our company and our knowledge when it comes to riding, so that makes it harder. (We loaned them a blanket for a sick horse and his grandfather refused to use it, saying it would "make the horse more cold and more sick.") 

While I'm concerned about the horse's well-being (should there be a horrid accident that they can't get over), I'm especially worried about the boy falling off and seriously injuring himself or losing his love with horses. While we have apt insurance to cover an event that may occur, it's in no way able to fix the emotional damage done to the boy.


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## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

I know. I mean I often "see" accidents happening in my mind, I am such a worry wort.
In a certain way, if he falls off it would do him a world of good. Usually kids arent really hurt, except their pride. If and when he does, well, my advice is to say NOTHING. let him put two and two together as to why it happended .


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## Cali (Feb 4, 2011)

Is there any way for him to take private lessons rather than being with other riders? It may have been embarassing for him to have his flaws yelled at him in front of a bunch of others. Also, this way you could keep a particularly close eye on him without having to worry about anyone else in the arena. It's a shame the grandfather is being so stubborn and clueless. 
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## kitten_Val (Apr 25, 2007)

That may be dumb, but... How about his WALK? Is the posture correct, balance in place, and he's relaxed? Because if he's lacking all that at the walk, he won't get it at the trot. So personally I'd start with the very confident walk, then transitions: trot 10 strides, back to walk 5 strides, back to trot, etc. 

Now (and please don't get it as offense :wink: ) lessons horses are usually tougher to ride than private (at least IMHO), so is that horse easy to slow/pick the trot?

I think you have to be honest with the kid. Explain that it takes hard work and he's doing a great progress, but need more work on balance...


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## mls (Nov 28, 2006)

Creampuff said:


> I tried to explain to him that what was happening was lack of instruction and bad habits he learned from riding family members, and how scared I was that he would fall off.
> 
> *Do you guys have any tips on how I can critique him without making him feel so hurt again? *​
> It could have been my tone, or the sheer fact that he realized that he wasn't as great of a rider as he thought he was. I'm not sure. But, regardless, I want to do my best to help this child's self-esteem _and_ improve his riding.


First off - do NOT say anything negative about his relatives. An 11 year old is going to run home and repeat anything you say.

As far as the bad posture - try the "ride a buck" game. Make it FUN for a while and then slowly work in correct. I do that with my beginner students. Fun, then work. Choose one problem at a time to correct and it will not be over whelming.


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## Northern (Mar 26, 2010)

Maybe he thought that you were shouting at him rather than raising your voice to be heard by him. I'd make sure he understood what happened there, first of all. (since that incident made him cry!)

Then, before further instruction, I'd have a heart-to-heart with him, telling him just what you've told us, that you aren't bashing relatives, it could've been a stranger who taught him bad habits, but that your job is to teach him to be *safe* & eventually even have fun riding. I'm sure that he'll appreciate your clarifying your concern for his safety; how could he not, since it shows that you care? 

You could also add that horsemanship takes a lifetime of self-improvement, & that not everyone has the passion for the dedication it takes, & that he must discover whether the passion burns within him. (No condemnation if not!, explain to him!) An option is to do other sports/disciplines for a while & see if he misses horses; lessons are expensive & time-consuming.

I'd also say that horsemanship isn't about rivalry with other humans, but about the relationship with your horse! He needs to see that his relative is missing the point entirely, so that he's no longer affected by such nonsense, wherever it may appear in future.


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## tempest (Jan 26, 2009)

How are you correcting him? Obviously you have to yell to be heard but what type of voice tone are you using?


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## Zeke (Jun 27, 2010)

If you do not feel comfortable with his balance at the canter why let him do it out on the rail by himself? When he's that far from you and struggling to stay on he most certainly cannot pay attention to you and when he can all he'll hear is you yelling over the other activity in the ring. I don't let my beginners canter until I feel confident they have complete control at the trot (understand and can preform a figure 8, picking up correct diagonals and knowing when to change them and how, does not use the reins for a brace/holds the saddle or just bounces too much in general etc) before we have them learn the canter on a lunge line. That way he is never more then 30 feet from you, which is an easy distance for calm and quiet suggestions on what to change and you have control of the horse. 

I, honestly, do not raise my voice at my students unless it's to catch their attention and ask them to bring the horse in to me. Even then I am careful to say only their name in a calm manner and try not to bark orders. Many kids shut down when they hear a raised voice with any tone of frustration (I know how frustrated you must be, I've been there!) and then you get tears. I make all corrections to my students position when the horse is standing next to me: toes up and explain why we do so, legs directly under shoulders and why that's important then I ask if they feel a difference between this position and what happens when they do whatever bad habit it is they have. I guess my log winded point is that lots and lots of calm explanation and one on one attention tends to work best. 

Another poster mentioned lots of praise, which I completely agree with. Remember he's 11 and right now riding should be about fun. You also need confidence to do well when riding am I right? Feeling like youre being yelled at or not good at riding does not help some kids want to get better. Even for the tiniest things tell him how great it was.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## ErikaLynn (Aug 3, 2010)

The only thing I see wrong is he needs to sit up taller and keep his shoulders back. It seems to me you are getting too frustrated and that it's just making it worse.

He's only 11, you should praise him when he does something right rather than nagging him. Also showing him what someone should look like, is really embarrassing, especially when they get on his horse and ride him better than him..if someone did that to me I would cry or get defensive. 

I think you should be very very patient, first of all, then while he is at the halt, have him sit in the proper position let him feel what is correct. Then have him walk...start slowly.

Good luck.


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## Zeke (Jun 27, 2010)

I'm going to second Erika, as she made a point i forgot to mention. Having another student get on his horse to show him how it's done is incredibly embarrassing! You can point out another student on their horse and have him watch their position but do so quickly and while he's still mounted so he can go try for himself. By having someone much more advances then he is get on, you are comparing him to that other rider and that's not fair, he's not to that level yet.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EmilyandNikki (Sep 7, 2010)

Turn fixing his position into a "game". Do this "game" with your entire lesson. When do many of these "games" in my lessons. So from what I see he needs to sit back more and sit taller, so you tell everyone in the group you are playing a "game". The goal of this game is to lean back, almost backward behind your saddle, with your back straight, and your shoulders back(in cadets we tell people to move there shoulders, up back and down for good posture). While this is over exaggerating, it will really bring the idea home for him, and give the other people a chance to strengthen there positions.

Also you could tell the group we are going back to the basics. So when I yell something out, I want everyone to do it, so if you yell out, "Sit Back" everyone should lean back more etc. When you say "Trot" everyone breaks into the trot, when you say "halt" everyone halts etc. So like a command class except add in things that need to be fixed.


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## sarahver (Apr 9, 2010)

You seem like a lovely person and you are somewhat in a difficult situation as there are other factors in this kids riding education that may be playing against you a little bit i.e. other relatives. The hard thing about this scenario is that sometimes kids have to be told the truth, even if they don't want to hear it. Praise is good in moderation but does not mean much if the other end of the scale is never experienced - praise becomes expected. Tricky though if you don't have parental support and/or consent to be tough as needed. 

Personally, I think it was more worrying that he was crying in response to being told what to do, how on earth will he deal with real life? Sure he is only 11 but cmon, by 11 I could be told what to do/what not to do without having a hissy fit.

What if you try some walk-trot exercises? I find with raw beginners they progressively lose their balance (and therefore confidence) the longer they trot. Would it be possible to get him to develop good balance at a walk, then do two trot strides, then walk, then do three trot strides etc and build his balance and therefore confidence to release his death grip on the saddle/mane.

Sounds a little like he would be a candidate for a some more one on one instruction before being allowed to ride in a group, not sure if that would be an option?


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## Creampuff (Dec 1, 2010)

Thank you all for your replies. I'm writing notes to bring to my boss, our "head instructor," to help the boy. 

As for riding alone, it's difficult. Our arena stays open (we keep the doors open so the horses can come in out of the weather; we lease the property and the owner has no lean-to or other structure in the pasture) and the dirt "humps" up over where the track should be (but is nowhere to be found). During the weekdays after cleaning we're exhausted and no one feels like riding because we just spent over an hour digging and chiseling away the dirt, ice, and frozen poo. 

Our normal regime is to let the young kids rider first (and the older riders help them prepare their horse and mount up), then they ride for an hour or so. Then reverse process for the older riders. The reason for this being that we feel most of our younger students shouldn't be cantering, and one girl is afraid to, and we don't want to stifle our older rider's "day." On this specific day my boss decided that riders of all ages were going to ride together.

She is the kind of person who wants to see the good in everybody, we all know the type, and took the boy's word for it that he's a "great rider" because he rides our smoothest horse (a painted TWH, you can literally hardly feel the difference between his walk and canter/gallop) like a champ. She never got to see him "in action" over the summer because she was running the business on her own while her partner was out of town and ran around like a chicken with her head cut off. One of our "expert" riders turned out to have had no previous instruction and recently was thrown from her horse when he simply spooked and side-stepped. Then there's the boy, who my boss was thoroughly disappointed with. 

Regardless, my boss gave him lessons over the very subject over the summer in the round pen, bareback, on Ben (our lesson horse who, outside of being stubborn and not wanting to keep his trot, does perfect). My boss made him ride bareback on Ben that day so he wouldn't have the _chance_ to death-grip that blasted saddle horn. He rode decently for about a week after that and then, plop, right back into old habits. 

The horse that he's on in the picture, _Lightning_, is another lesson horse. He's extremely easy to get "going" (a light tap = trot, a kick = GOGOGO!), and equally as easy to stop -- if one doesn't jerk the reins (if they do he throws his head up as high as he can). 

This past riding session I rode a mare, Sugar, and showed him my posture (I did the poles so I would have less chance to think about my posture and "fake it"). He said, "So what am I doing wrong?" and I showed him at a stand-still (he wanted me to display the same posture while I was trotting/cantering, and I refused him, explaining once more how dangerous it was). He later rode the same horse and made the same mistakes as before, the same mistakes as he did over the summer.

I'm going to try (if I'm not riding as well) to take more video footage of him riding, and then take him into the "warming room" (which is the viewing room, attached to the arena) and show him the videos on my laptop and explain to him what he's doing. Would this be an effective way to do this? That way we're not embarrassing him again when it comes to someone else riding his horse, and definitely more-so than shouting out? 

In addition, this boy is one of our volunteers and rides "drag," a position in the back of the trail ride where they watch the back of the guide in case something happens they don't happen to see. Thus making his position as a rider even more important because there _will_ be times that we trot (and some horses, as we all know, trot fast or others can canter in a line full of trotting horses), and the last thing we need is someone falling off on the trail, where they are more difficult to reach. 

Another oddity: He does perfectly fine on Ben. I'm thinking now that maybe he just can't match up to Lightning's rhythm to find his balance??


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## Gidget (Jan 19, 2010)

If you are worried he will possibly fall you need to make him wear a helmet for his safety.It looks like he is bracing himself a lot. I use to put my heels up and toes down and hold on to the horn.

Can you do lunge line exercises?It will help his balance.Do you have wavers that are to be signed ?


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## Creampuff (Dec 1, 2010)

Gidget said:


> Can you do lunge line exercises?It will help his balance.Do you have wavers that are to be signed ?


I did the same thing when I first started to ride and bounced around like a jumping bean. We require all of our volunteers and customers to sign waivers annually (there's a new waiver each year). We have helmets, as well. 

I can do some lunging exercises with him, but I'd like someone to explain that to me -- it's something I've never done with a horse _and_ rider. 

When he first joined us, he was so excited that he was almost 12 -- at the age of 12, riders had a choice of helmet wear. With our _new_ insurance, he would have to wait until 14. He was so "depressed" by it my soft-hearted boss allowed him the choice. I recently talked to him about this, explaining that if something would happen to him that required hospitalization, the company would be in major trouble because he didn't have a helmet. He resented me and said, "But boss said I don't have to," and walked away. 

I suppose it's a "whatever" statement. He'll learn when he knocks his noggin if he wants to be so stubborn pertaining to basic safety gear.


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## Gidget (Jan 19, 2010)

alright,well I hope he understands that it isn't good to fall on your head. MAYBE you should show him a video of what happens to ppl who don't wear helmets because I still think he should especially if he is really off balance. 

Lunging exercises have helped me a ton. 

Here is an article that isn't horribly long that will help you getr some ideas of lunging exercises.Can he ride in an english saddle to learn his balance?Stirrups can flip over the horses withers which is nice.


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## horseloverd2 (Jan 23, 2009)

I had a confidence problem myself when I first started riding. It can be discouraging to receive critique, even if it's constructive, especially for a kid! 

I'd try telling him to picture himself riding the horse. That helps me a lot, even now. Sometimes my position won't be very good and I'll just think about the rider I want to look like, and it just happens. If you picture your back straight, for example, it'll straighten naturally. Even habits that people aren't aware of can sometimes be fixed by this. There's some scientific explanation to it... I'm not sure what it's called.

As far as him matching up to a particular horse goes, you may want to keep him on the horse he is most comfortable with until his posture and seat are consistent. 

Watching yourself in a video can be a great tool. 

If you haven't already done this already, maybe try encouraging a sitting trot? I personally got my balance through a lot of bareback riding.


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## horseloverd2 (Jan 23, 2009)

horseloverd2 said:


> I had a confidence problem myself when I first started riding. It can be discouraging to receive critique, even if it's constructive, especially for a kid!


Just thought I should mention I didn't mean you shouldn't give him critique. If you're taking lessons and trying to improve your riding, it doesn't matter how old you are... you should be getting and accepting critique. In the case with someone who is not confident, though, critique should be given extremely careful and 'sandwiched' Good comment, constructive one, and another good comment.


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## phoenix (Jun 7, 2010)

I took a bunch of lunge line lessons a few years ago and it really helped me with my balance issues, plus they're a lot of fun. You really need a horse that lunges well and is steady on the lunge line because then you can focus on your student and not on keeping the horse steay or going. 

If you go with lunge lessons take away the sudents reins and then he can do things like holding his arms out to his sides to try and show his gripping the horn isn't required. toy can do things like having his hold his legs out to his sides (at a walk and at the trot) - so have him hold one leg out away from the saddle and then the other leg for a few strides and then both legs, this will help him sit deeper and get a better balance on his seat bones. on the line you could maybe have him close his eyes and to feel the motion of the horse. Have him shout out the diagnals to you (does he post? i know it's harder in a western saddle but teaching him that could be helpful).

there are loads of things you can do on the lunge line. i liked one exercise when my instuctor would ask me to reach back and touch behind the saddle with each hand, that might help bring his shoulders back.

you could also teach him to stop the horse on the lunge line (thats a big confience booster!). my instructor would make me blow out like i was blowing out a candle, it makes the stomach muscles contact and is an essential part of a half halt. i learned to do this on a draft horse i was lunged on and i always had the hardest time getting him to "feel" me as i'm so small, and when i finally got him to stop just by using my seat it was a great feeling.

i know you said that he seems to get it and then goes right back to his bad habits, try and remember that bad habits are easy to fall back into and it does take a long time to relearn good habits, just keep him at it and correct him and help him along the way by suggesting new things and ways to keep it fun and new. if he feels like your just repeating yourself and he's repeating himself he'll get discouraged.

hope this helps.


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## GeminiJumper (Jun 12, 2008)

Because of his age, I would definitely do a lot of encouragement, praise especially when they are doing something correct. Pay attention as to how you are using your voice when you are having to shout to talk to someone. As someone mentioned before, it is very embarrassing and insulting when you have another person get up on the same horse and ride it better. As far as trying to show him how the correct position is supposed to be, have him walk the horse--which is what he needs to be doing lots of right now to establish balance--and you could walk next to him and position his body parts to where they should be. I know you say there are lots of riders at the same time, there is a lot of pressure for him to do good and he feels the need to impress everyone. That's one of the downfalls of group lessons.


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## Northern (Mar 26, 2010)

*Another suggestion:*

Pushing Passenger lesson is really fun & educational (for the horse, too!): one leaves the reins alone, V's the hands over the base of the horse's neck, pushes oneself back into a deep seat with every stride, & just lets the horse go where it wants to, in an enclosed space (size dependent upon the "go-iness" of the horse). It teaches one to not rely upon the reins for balance, & not to micro-manage the horse. The horse enjoys the development of those skills in the rider! The only direction from the rider is to maintain the gait that the rider chooses, but the horse must be allowed to break gait first, before the rider directs to resume the gait. (no punishment for breaking gait; this also teaches horse to maintain gait) 

If the horse speeds up past the directed gait, wind him down to a stop with one rein only.


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## cfralic (Jan 17, 2011)

I really, strongly agree with GeminiJumper. If he is so anxious that he is in tears then perhaps it would be a good idea to give him some confidence-boosting activities? He is a pretty young guy and I know it's hard but sometimes the best of us forget to put ourselves in the student's shoes. (How would you feel if you were in a class writing out a problem on the blackboard and the teacher saw you doing the problem wrong, took the chalk from you and called another student up to do it 'properly' because they were 'better' then you?) I know it sounds harsh but that kind of thing can really dampen a spirit.

I think you are a good teacher for searching for an answer from outside sources because sometimes it's really hard to see things from every angle by yourself.


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## Trilogy (Jan 25, 2011)

Has this boy signed up for lessons? I couldn't tell if it was that or just a fun ride. If he has signed up for lessons, and there is already 'bad feeling' between you and him (he feels embarrassed, you feel frustrated), I would suggest taking it right back to square one. Ask him what he wants to accomplish and respect that. If he wants to have fun and ride the more exciting horses, then he needs a secure seat, if he wants to compete etc then he will need more finesse. You could always appeal to his budding testosterone by telling him that you and him are going to work on a way to make him the best rider in the universe and how he will be able to handle any horse on the planet! (that will impress all those 11 year old girls!). 

Also, if you are being undermined by the family, I believe you need to address this - ask the Grandpa what he wants Junior to learn and then lay out a plan...if he doesn't buy into it then he can leave.

I can't say why, but I kind of got the feeling that between Grandpa, the cousin and life in general this kid might be feeling just a bit humiliated...it sounds like he is with a group of kids way more advanced than he is...if that picture is a recent trot, then no way should he be cantering. Can he go with a group where he is at the same level?

And finally...it looks like he is wearing a beanie? I know it could be the effect you have on, but is he wearing a helmet? Most barns around me insist that all minors were helmets...the liability issues are insane when it comes to kids. But then, I am in California!


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## Horsel02 (Jan 6, 2010)

Gidget said:


> alright,well I hope he understands that it isn't good to fall on your head. MAYBE you should show him a video of what happens to ppl who don't wear helmets because I still think he should especially if he is really off balance.
> 
> Lunging exercises have helped me a ton.
> 
> Here is an article that isn't horribly long that will help you getr some ideas of lunging exercises.Can he ride in an english saddle to learn his balance?Stirrups can flip over the horses withers which is nice.


My twin sister had to learn to walk and talk again after a head injury from falling off of our pony when we were 5 years old. That was before my mom made us wear helmet. I really hope that he decides to wear a helmet.


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## Creampuff (Dec 1, 2010)

Trilogy said:


> Has this boy signed up for lessons? I couldn't tell if it was that or just a fun ride. If he has signed up for lessons, and there is already 'bad feeling' between you and him (he feels embarrassed, you feel frustrated), I would suggest taking it right back to square one. Ask him what he wants to accomplish and respect that. If he wants to have fun and ride the more exciting horses, then he needs a secure seat, if he wants to compete etc then he will need more finesse. You could always appeal to his budding testosterone by telling him that you and him are going to work on a way to make him the best rider in the universe and how he will be able to handle any horse on the planet! (that will impress all those 11 year old girls!).


No helmet. In my previous post I explained my soft-hearted boss and why she gave him the choice to wear a helmet instead of waiting until he's 14 (which is what our insurance requires). Little does he know, if our insurance company finds out he can kiss these horses good-bye! It's a "coolness" thing for him; the helmet makes him look like a dolt (and he can't wear his fancy-pants hat), he won't have it on his head. 

What frustrates me with my _boss_ is that, with his seat being the way it is, she's letting him ride our "expert" (1 of 2) mare. This mare is notorious for being full of **** & vinegar; her favorite rider (if a horse could have a favorite?) was nearly wrecked because the horse bucked up [out of excitement] when she was asked to trot. After a time or two she was a-okay. Why does he get to ride this horse? Because he brought up his reading grade from a C to a B. :roll: This time I'm _really_ going to push the helmet issue and not let him go until he has one on; I even plan to put one on with him. I just hope he understands that this horse isn't one of the dead-broke horses he regularly rides. As a matter of fact, this mare bucks with her head up. (Making it harder to stop her from doing so.)

As for his status, he's a barn volunteer. After he took a 1-week Horse 101 camp with the local YMCA he swindled into our volunteer staff. With this he gets to ride for free and sometimes gets lessons when my boss (or whoever had the most energy over the summer) could give them. Lessons were especially given when another, older volunteer would bring his posture up to the boss lady. 

To be honest, I don't know what his level of riding is. I'm torn between saying "beginner" and "intermediate." He has time in the saddle (intermediate trait), but no proper instruction (bumping him to square one). I'm crossing my fingers that we can get our arena doors sorted out and he comes in during the week days, where I can give him more one-on-one (one two-on-one, since boss lady will be there as well giving pointers) instruction. 

Boss lady has been riding horses for 20-something years and never had a wreck. I have a meager 1 year. Neither of us have been wrecked. The boy, on the other hand, recently fell off of his poke-along, lazy-as-can be horse with his grandfather. 

I'll try to have the sit-down his his grandfather (and maybe his cousin, to feed her the hard truth that she's not "miss thang" on a horse and should join us for a couple lessons, as well) to see how that would work out. I'm trying to get to where I can join them for a trail ride on their property with the boarders (a friend boards her horse with theirs) so I can [hopefully] evaluate this little shin-dig on his own "turf," where he's more comfortable and more likely to let himself relax.


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## twogeldings (Aug 11, 2008)

I did some lessons for a friend. No confidence, terrible posture, etc. Never rode before in her life kinda deal :wink:

Instead of saying "You need to sit up more, heels down, deepen your seat, etc." I made it _exciting_ like riding this slow-poke mare was _the most amazing thing on earth to happen, ever_. 
I talked to her near constantly, I'd call out things like: "Thats EXCELLENT Stacy (I just pulled that out of nowhere)! Your doing FANTASTIC! Let me see those heels down (be all: you goose, don't forget!)! Good good! I'm liking that! Little looser on the reins...perfect! Don't be afraid to let go of the horn, just tuck that tush on down into that saddle! Perfect, absolutely great! I love it! And _relax_! Nothing better then relaxing, absolutely perfect!" 

In between I'd have her stop (her hands or seat was wrong, leaning to the left, etc.) and I'd explain what I want to see more clearly. I'd go, "I'm really liking the connection I'm seeing, really feel the horse. Now, I'd like to see those thumbs up on the reins, makes your cues a lot quicker./Try to relax a bit more, your doing wonderful, but if you get to excited -grin- your horse is going to get excited to./I want you to try and act really pompus in the saddle, sit up like a Spanish/English/Whatevercomestomind King/Queen and pretend like your riding past your royal servants. Really snuggle that tush right into the seat and stick your nose in the air!"

I would throw out those little reminders in between "Your doing great!" or "Thats fantastic! I'm really liking that!" and say something like, "Just a smidgen lower with those hands! AWESOME! That's great! Keep it up, your doing wonderful!". If they do something right, praise it, be "I'm LOVING your hands/seat/posture"

The things beginners need the MOST is confidence and inspiration. Especially the youngsters. Don't inflate their ego, but get them excited about being on that horse! I took _riding lessons for a year_ and I didn't have the confidence or balance to do so much as canter! Then I got an instructor who got me pumped up about it....all of a sudden that canter wasn't scary, but wonderful!
If you make it fun, really make them feel like this is the greatest thing ever, you can get more serious. You can be, "Alright, today where going to some really boring stuff, alright? Like..._seriously boring_. We're going to ride without stirrups at a walk and trot, no big deal am I right? I'm really loving how your hands and posture have been looking, so we're going to put some more oopf behind it. This stuff is excellent oopf material. Mix it up a bit, you know? Alright! Lets get started, just take him around with stirrups, get warmed up, get loose, relax!" 

Get pumped up and you bet your students will get pumped too  My friend always dismounted with a such a glow, you would have thought she just won an Olympic Gold Medal. She _loved_ it, and she improved REALLY quick!


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## Creampuff (Dec 1, 2010)

Thank you _so _much for those tips, Twogeldings, I'm sure they'll help a lot! (And they might just surprise my boss when I whip them out. It sounds like a great instructor skill to have!) 

When I was learning, I learned by bantering and shouting from my boss and one of our senior riders. We'd joke back and forth as I flopped everywhere and, in the midst, they'd shout out instructions. After a while we figured it out: *I was thinking too much!* Once I pushed myself to start considering riding _fun_ again and not a "job," my seat improved. 

With the social situation this child is in, in addition to him being a thorn in the volunteers' sides, I've tried to take him under my wing as my little brother. (They look and act enough alike, haha.) I've given him little tips on riding throughout the recent months.


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## churumbeque (Dec 20, 2009)

Why would you have him cantering before he is capable? That sounds irresponsible. He needs to learn how to sit the trot before he should be cantering. I am guessing with his position the horse may be going to fast for him


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## Creampuff (Dec 1, 2010)

churumbeque said:


> Why would you have him cantering before he is capable? That sounds irresponsible. He needs to learn how to sit the trot before he should be cantering. I am guessing with his position the horse may be going to fast for him


I'm not the head instructor; it's all up to boss lady and she likes to give people more credit than what they're worth. I'm going to try to have a conversation with her about his position and things I've learned here to help fix it. I also want to try a variety of other posture and "soft hand" exercises I know about. According to some of the volunteers (who has owned horses in their own past, I have not), I'm simply ignorant and can therefore not help another rider. Most of my tips (many of them I learned from those very people) are thrown over shoulders. 

Example of the too-soft-heart: My boss took in a volunteer who claimed to be a competitive calf roper. His favorite horse (and the one he rode most often) was a Tennessee Walking Horse, smooth as glass. One day he was in the at-the-time-new round pen exercising this horse (who's our lesson horse); another volunteer had an Appaloosa, not as smooth, who was acting up. So my boss had the first boy (the "calf roper") ride this horse. When they began to trot, "Calf Roper" began to flop all over like a dead fish! (He would literally fall backwards and nearly touch his back to the horse's hip.) My boss then discovered: He duped her. 

In my personal opinion this kid shouldn't even be trotting right now. I'd like to get him into the arena -- by himself -- and work him out a little more. He has the potential to have a fantastic seat but is, unfortunately for him, distractable -- so the seat he does have is lost in a matter of minutes. 

Since he rode once or twice with us before he volunteered and rides with his grandfather (which, to my understanding, they only walk or gallop) I don't know _how_ many times [with useless or no instruction], my boss took his word for it that he knows how to ride. If I'm starting to see that he's not what he made himself out to be, she should be too. Hopefully the coming discussion will help us sort this situation.


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## natisha (Jan 11, 2011)

churumbeque said:


> Why would you have him cantering before he is capable? That sounds irresponsible. He needs to learn how to sit the trot before he should be cantering. I am guessing with his position the horse may be going to fast for him


I agree. 
If he doesn't like being treated like a beginner, tough, he is a beginner. I would also insist on a helmet. He needs 1:1 lessons. I'd put him on a horse with reins on a halter, on a lunge line for starters. Then work on position & following the horse's movement at the walk until he had that down pat. Then move on to trotting 1/4 circles.
I'd kick Gramps out of the arena too but that's just me :wink:


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## Trilogy (Jan 25, 2011)

Just one other thought - if your owners insurance says helmets till 14 and she lets students ride without them, then in the event of a fall she will be personally liable and open for one heck of a lawsuit. In letting riders ride horses they are not ready for she is open to accusations of negligence etc. As a trainer allowing this to happen, you may also be liable. I would put your concerns into writing and give it the barn owner to have on record that you have noted these discrepancies....even an email would be fine as long as you keep a record.

Remember that even if the student decides not to sue after a fall, the desicion to do that is the health insurance companies to reclaim costs...if they get a sniff of liability they will be after it like a cat on a mouse.


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## CelticAngel (Jan 2, 2011)

Everyone else has addressed anything that I would have said....but I completely agree with the fact that he shouldn't be cantering at all. My trainers say all the time " If ya' can't do it walking, you won't be able to do it trotting or faster."

However, I always manage to get a grin when I fire back that posting is -much- easier trotting. =-)


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