# Not A Plus Sized Rider.. But Looking For Some Help



## Ray MacDonald

I don't have much of a sugestion.. But I do hope you can convince her to ride again! Tell her how much fun it is and that you would really like her to come ride with you


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## Evansk

Ray MacDonald said:


> I don't have much of a sugestion.. But I do hope you can convince her to ride again! Tell her how much fun it is and that you would really like her to come ride with you


 
O believe me I do! Every chance I get  but shes stuck in that mind set of thinking shes too heavy and wont ride


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## MHFoundation Quarters

Invite her to this forum and let her see that it is possible! 

I too have bulldog type QH's and they can certainly handle a heavier rider. My hubby is 220 lbs of muscle, he rides several of mine with no problems. One of his favorites is our 14.1 cutting bred stud, he weighs around 980 lbs and can still move like a cat with my hubby on board. 

I'm not plus size now but have been so I can relate. I never stopped riding but when I was at my heaviest, I didn't feel as 'in charge'. The only way to overcome those feelings is to ride. Start in the arena and take it nice and slow to build her confidence back up. I'm sure like most that have been out of the saddle for awhile and come back to it, she will realize how much she missed it and forget about her worries.


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## LetAGrlShowU

Why dont you show her some of the threads on this part of the forum? Show her that there are a lot of riders who share her concerns but still get to enjoy riding! Maybe get her to just hang out with you and the horses- ie: grooming, playing, training- she may enjoy it enough to give it a go.


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## Country Woman

yea show her this forum 

your Quarter Horses can carry your friend


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## draftgrl

LetAGrlShowU said:


> Why dont you show her some of the threads on this part of the forum? Show her that there are a lot of riders who share her concerns but still get to enjoy riding! Maybe get her to just hang out with you and the horses- ie: grooming, playing, training- she may enjoy it enough to give it a go.


 
I'm in complete agreement with you! Especially with just getting your friend out playing with the horses. If you're able to convince her to get out and groom, lunge, and just play with them, and horses are truley in her blood, she won't be able to resist not riding for too much longer!!


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## LeaDFW

After riding my entire life, I endured many horse-less years -- mainly due to thinking I too fat to ride (this started when I weighed 130 lbs, BTW). I spent 20 years telling myself I was too heavy to ride -- 20 YEARS of waiting for "someday, when I'm thinner" . . . I finally started riding again this year after a few gentle nudges from my daughter's trainer who repeatedly assured me that 1) I wouldn't make a fool of myself and 2) she most assuredly would never let someone ride who was heavier than the horses could handle. I finally stopped feeling sorry for myself, bit the bullet, and trusted her judgment -- and I'm the happiest I've been in years. My husband says he likes the "new" me (horsey me!) a WHOLE lot better. (I do, too!)


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## Golden Horse

LeaDFW said:


> After riding my entire life, I endured many horse-less years -- mainly due to thinking I too fat to ride (this started when I weighed 130 lbs, BTW). I spent 20 years telling myself I was too heavy to ride -- 20 YEARS of waiting for "someday, when I'm thinner" . .


Tell her this, because there are so many of us who can relate.

being big does not mean that you can't live your life, and it is a waste, a huge sad waste if you keep saying that you can't do things because you are to big, get out there and ride lady.

I missed so many years of riding because I thought I was to big, when I lost all of the weight I started riding, and I'm so so angry that I missed out on so much.

So now I've been laid up for a while with a bad knee and I'm heavy again, but I now know that getting back into the saddle will be the best thing for me, lots of little rides to start with then more and more getting me and my horse fitter and fitter.

Evansk's friend, please get up there and ride, if Evansk is happy for you to ride, get up there and ride. Good luck and have fun.


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## Shiavo

I don't really know how to help, but when I was asked to come for a ride on a friends stock horse (I had also been out of riding for many years and am a much bigger person now that I was then) I immediately said 'Are you sure I'm not too heavy for him?' my friend laughed as said 'Honey, you're an afterthought! Better a bigger person that has an idea of how to ride than a little person flopping around on his back!' . 

This made me feel a lot better about getting back into riding.


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## xxBarry Godden

Eva, as we all mostly accept that the problem of weight carrying does not lie with the horse - rather it lies with the rider. Perhaps your friend is nervous of either getting up on the horse - or how she looks when she's on it. 

Now if you could borrow for a couple of days a 16 hand, docile shire, with a shaggy mane and slow purpose full walk, then maybe you could call your friend's bluff. 

If I were in your shoes I'd be querying your friend's motivation.


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## Lonestar22

Hell, show her pictures of me riding and tell her if my fat butt is up on a horse, her's should be too!!! Hahaha. 

I think bringing her to this forum, specifically this section and thread, would be a great way to show her that she CAN! It's also great excersize and good for confidence to be up on a horses back. 

My sister weighs like 130 lbs, I weigh nearly twice that. I let her ride my mare one day and she commented on how Daisy probably felt as if no one was riding her. Laughing I told her that she'd probably prefer me up there because I wouldn't be flopping all around!


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## Evansk

Well, I've been trying to get her on the forum, I think talking to riders who have dealt with the same problems, she's thinking about it.. We don't have Shires and big horses like that here where I am. Most of the horses here are Yukon- Mutt mixed breed horses..smaller, stocky and hardy for hunting and packing.


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## Dreamcatcher Arabians

Evansk said:


> ...... Most of the horses here are Yukon- Mutt mixed breed horses..smaller, stocky and hardy for ..... packing.


 
Remind her that the smallest thing thing with antlers that you would pack out up there in the Yukon probably weighs twice if not three times what she does and the horses handle it fine. Not only that, but it's much easier to carry living weight than 'dead' weight.


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## Golden Horse

Barry Godden said:


> If I were in your shoes I'd be querying your friend's motivation.


Really? I have been in the friends shoes and I get where she is coming from, motivation is easier to come by if you can be convinced that yoy aren't going to damage a living being.

Not the same, but an insight into the working of a fat womans mind:

Last week DH and DS dusted off the wii fit and decided that we were going to all get back on the fitness trail. I refused to get on it.

a) My commitment to getting back to health and fitness started today, not last week.

b) Most important I know that the balance board with the wii has a weight limit, and I was convinced that I was going to get on and it was going to scream "GET OFF GET OFF, YOU ARE BREAKING ME" 

This morning I eventually got brave and confronted those **** scales that have been collecting dust in the bathroom, :shock: Well guess what, I'm actually 20 pounds lighter than I thought and well within the capabilities of the wii, and when it comes to it, to riding my new horse, I don't think he's going to break after all.

The fat womans internal dialogue is a very complicated thing.


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## Lonestar22

Golden Horse said:


> The fat womans internal dialogue is a very complicated thing.


Seriously. Lol. 

Mine goes something along the lines of "Ugh, I'm gross, look at how I jiggle, time for a new diet!! Is that chocolate? I love chocolate! But it makes me jiggle. Some guys like jiggle right? One peice.....NO! You can barely mount your damned horse from the ground!!! It's not really the chocolates fault......"


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## Golden Horse

:rofl::rofl::rofl: try standing on one leg, behind a door, wearing a sock on your head, I hear it neutralizes calories.:wink:


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## Country Woman

very funny


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## Lonestar22

Noooo, you just wanna make me look like an idiot!!! Hahahahaha! My dad and brother would be like "WTF are you doing?"


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## Golden Horse

Foiled again:twisted:


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## Evansk

Lonestar22 said:


> Seriously. Lol.
> 
> Mine goes something along the lines of "Ugh, I'm gross, look at how I jiggle, time for a new diet!! Is that chocolate? I love chocolate! But it makes me jiggle. Some guys like jiggle right? One peice.....NO! You can barely mount your damned horse from the ground!!! It's not really the chocolates fault......"


 
I totally burst out laughing at work! My co-workers think im nuts.. You guys are great  . She's going to join the forum, but at the moment she's not ready to talk about her issues, but she will read through the forums.


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## Lonestar22

Thats great she's going to join! She can talk about them whenever she feels ready or not at all. I just hope we can give her the confidence to ride again!!


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## Golden Horse

I'm so glad that she is going to join and read, there are lots of pics that us big girls have shared of ourselves riding, I hope they reassure her that she can give it a go.

Just to add some thoughts, and maybe some of the others will back me up here...

As a big person you just know that when you put your foot in the stirrup you will either 

A) make the horse fall over

B) Pull the saddle right round under the horses stomach.

While A is unlikely, B remains a possibility, especially if you like me ride horses that weren't blessed with withers:lol:

To assist with the mounting it is beneficial to both horse and rider to have a good solid block to mount from, no not an upturned bucket, but something stable that we know will give us a firm platform. 

You should ask her if she is more comfortable having one or two people around the first time she mounts, I had my son holding the horse, and hubby holding the off stirrup and being ready to support me.

If she used to ride at a lighter weight she needs to be prepared for the fact it will feel different, there is a moment when you feel that this is a scary and foreign place to be, but then everything kind of falls into place again.

I was going to say that any of the plus sized crowd would be only to happy to chat by pm if she doesn't feel comfortable sharing on the main board, but I think you have to have a minimum number of posts before the pm thing will work.


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## LeaDFW

And remind her that there is no shame in taking it nice and slow, LOL. The first time I got back on a horse, I literally walked in a circle for 30 minutes -- probably did that the first three times! It takes a bit of time to readjust to riding again, especially if you used to ride at a different weight.

I'm betting that once she tries it again, she won't want to stop!


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## MHFoundation Quarters

Evansk said:


> I totally burst out laughing at work! My co-workers think im nuts.. You guys are great  . She's going to join the forum, but at the moment she's not ready to talk about her issues, but she will read through the forums.


Fantastic! When I joined I did tons of reading and getting a feel for the place before I posted, now I'm an addict and probably post too much :lol: 

Even if she's not ready to talk about her issues, we're glad to have her here and she will definitely have a support system if and when she is ready.


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## draftgrl

Golden Horse said:


> I'm so glad that she is going to join and read, there are lots of pics that us big girls have shared of ourselves riding, I hope they reassure her that she can give it a go.
> *I for one will help anyway possible! *
> Just to add some thoughts, and maybe some of the others will back me up here...
> 
> As a big person you just know that when you put your foot in the stirrup you will either
> 
> A) make the horse fall over
> *It sure does feel that way sometimes, especially on a horse you're not used to!*
> 
> B) Pull the saddle right round under the horses stomach.
> 
> While A is unlikely, B remains a possibility, especially if you like me ride horses that weren't blessed with withers:lol:
> *Or forget to tighten the cinch after getting off to retreive the cap that flew off while running through the field! Then end up fallin right on your ars because of it.....nope never happened to me  lol*


On a side note...reading everyone's posts' I think it is great how everyone pulls together here to help one another. Its crazy stupid how in alot of barns there are the cliqs (sp) and those needing the help never get it because of those who are too good to assist others.


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## dee

Honey, if I can do it, your friend can. I am probably by far the heaviest rider on this forum - seriously. I'm down a bit from where I was, but at one point I weighed 305. My mare isn't especially tanky - she's actually rather fine legged. But - she has a short back and very deep loin and when I finally listened to others - specifically a professional trainer - that told me she could carry me, I tried riding her the first time last March. 

She didn't appreciate it - she hadn't been ridden in several years and was still a bit under weight and under muscled - but she had no real problem. That first ride was very short - only about 15 minutes, and was only at a walk. The first 3 - 4 minutes, I felt very wobbly, and it showed in the video my daughter shot. (It didn't help that the saddle I used came nowhere near fitting me!) After that, I found my balance, and Dancer's attitude changed. It was wonderful!

We went on a trail ride in June - Dancer had no trouble carrying my fat backside and kept pace with the hyper Paso Finos that were leading our group. I would have preferred a slower pace, but Dancer dropped into a lovely (and suprising) shuffling gait and just kept on trucking. 

I pushed us both just a little too far that day. Dancer showed no ill effects, but I was another story. But, I'm ready to do it again!


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## Evansk

Well! she did join and read all the threads.. her user name is sleepythunder  but.. she decided that she wants to try riding in the spring with me!! FINALLY!


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## Golden Horse

HI :wave: Sleepythunder, welcome to the forum,


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## MHFoundation Quarters

Evansk said:


> Well! she did join and read all the threads.. her user name is sleepythunder  but.. she decided that she wants to try riding in the spring with me!! FINALLY!


That's great! Welcome to the forum sleepythunder!


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## sleepythunder

So yes i have decided to try riding again in the spring. And its not that i always feel that i am too big that i can't ride. I'm not a giant fan of the "smaller" horse breeds. I like the bigger draft and draft crosses. I always have even when i was younger and smaller. Evansk has a fabulous horse for me to ride, so i know it will be fine, but i'm still nervous. I head south to the big city for other reasons this week but i am going to check out some tack shops for saddles. Evansk is not the only friend that wants to go riding with me, but she is the only person i will be riding with until i'm 100% confidant again.


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## Golden Horse

Good for you sleepy, plenty of time to prepare for riding again, and I'm sure you are going to have great fun


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## EighteenHands

Invite her to visit this forum so she can see all of the plus size cowgirls here.......if that still doesn't work I would be more than happy to chat with her via email ([email protected]) I am the founder of EighteeHands.com and I help a lot of "plus size" woman with confidence building.

Good Luck!


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## gingerscout

I am a plus sized rider.. and I had always wanted to learn how to ride.. and I always thought I was too big as well.. I used to weigh well over 300 pounds.. well I looked around long enough that I found someone that said that the weight was just a number and they could convince me otherwise if I wanted to ride.. so I took her up on it.. and after a couple of rides I didnt worry so much as her average horses did fine with me.. now that I have lost a lot of weight.. still plus sized but well under 300 now.. I ride a horse in lessons that is technically a pony.. and he does awesome with me.. he is a tank of a horse.. missed horse by a couple of inches, but I call him a horse anyways.. so I never thought being plus sized I could ever ride a pony either


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## sleepythunder

So its been awhile since i was on here but... This spring i started riding again. I did ride Evansk one quarter horse bareback but just for a short jaunt in the corrals. I have another friend who had access to old pack horses and have been riding with her. I still don't feel quite comfortable on Evansk horse Buddy, but am working towards it.


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## Joe4d

maybe she just doesnt want to, or some people just like to constantly be begged to do something so always have an excuse or reason they cant go. I used to get caught up trying to get people to come to pistol matches, or go Bass fishing, seems people never run out of excuses.


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## sleepythunder

Joe4d, that is not the case with me, but I'm sure there are people out there that do that exact thing.


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## DixieDarlin

Hello Sleepythunder! I'm also a plus sized rider who's just getting back into riding


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## sleepythunder

So i know this thread is pretty old but i thought i'd post here anyway. it was my best friend that started it to help me get out of the mind set that i was too big to ride. well i started riding again, thought i'd post a pic of me and one of the horses i ride. Her name is Phibi & she a 4 yr bush horse.


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## lbhorsegirl91

show her this

22" All Purpose Saddle | eBay

i'm a plus sized rider, switching from english (hence the selling my saddle) 
to western pleasure. i wear a pant size 22 and i just rode in national semi finals for IHSA western pleasure. it's doable.


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## Saddlebag

Perhaps suggest if she could lose 10 lbs she'd be fine. That might be an attainable goal for her, especially if she helps with chores.


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