# Getting angry at my horse



## sempre_cantando (May 9, 2008)

a short message from me coz I can't type due to my cut finger  

Remind yourself of why you ride in the first place - to have fun!!!! If things aren't going right, don't keep trying but have a break until you cool down and are ready 2 try again. The only exception to this is if he's really misbehaving and you don't want to reward this bad behaviour.


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## kitten_Val (Apr 25, 2007)

Sit quietly and breath hard. In, out, in, out, for while.  I have the same problem (I'm getting too nervous or mad too fast  ), and it helps to relax. Also horse can feel it and relaxes too.


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## mell (Sep 5, 2007)

not sure if this will help but this is what i do when i get like that. I get off and sit. yep sit untill i feel better. lol


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## Angel_Leaguer (Jun 13, 2008)

Horses know when you are upset... just try to push through it without blowing up. I would recommened not getting off the horse to relax until you have made your horse behave (if you are trying something new and the horse isnt getting it then go back to what you were doing before stopping. They may just not get what you are asking) Also if my horse behaved I will take the saddle off at the arena and walk the horse back to the stall where I will do a nice full body brushing before turning out (reward) and if the ride didnt go too good they get to carry the saddle back and get enough brushing to prevent saddle sore type stuff and then they stay tied a bit longer before getting turned out. There isnt the whole petting and scratching either (punishment) After doing this enough they start to really catch on, and horses really do what to please their owner...

Not sure if this makes sense but I dont think just jumping off when you are mad helps things. If your horse continues to upset you then maybe you need to get a trainer to help you through a few lessons to see where the disconnect is between you and your horse.


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## Small_Town_Girl (Feb 15, 2008)

Always remember, your horse is your friend...he is your partner, 
you are a team when riding, you are going to make mistakes 
along your journey together. When you fall off a horse, you gotta
get back up on the saddle, meaning you gotta keep on trying. 

Enjoy riding your horse and like everyone else said BREATHE 
and think happy thoughts!


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## PoptartShop (Jul 25, 2010)

Just try to stay calm...breathe, relax, take a deep breath.  To cool off, maybe just walk (while on your horse) around the arena for a little bit, then start working again.


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## my2geldings (Feb 18, 2008)

Remember that "There are only problems riders, not problem horses". Everything that you do will affect the way your horse reacts and will do or not do something you ask him. Getting frustrated at him isn't fair at all because chances are he is getting confused at the mixed signals you are giving him. I'm sure he's trying the best he can with the information he is receiving.

Take a deep breath and pull yourself together.


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## horsey*kisses (May 12, 2008)

i know exactaly what you're talking about i get mad at my horse all the time and sometimes slip and yank or jab a bit i have a really bad temper so sometimes it just all spills out and i take it out on the closest person, but im getting better at controlling it lol
i usually just keep my horse going, or i have him turn circles for a minute to calm him down and i take deep breaths and calm down, then think 'why did he do that?' or 'why did he not do that' when i come to a conclusion i try again, or i walk away and leave that activity for a day when both him and i are more cooperative with each other, 
i try not to put him away when both of us are mad at each other, sometimes i do, but i always go see him later when i have calmed down and apologize or talk with him a little, 
also a good tip is when you want to yell really loud at him and yank and jab and completly fall off your rocker take a quick deep breath and do the exact opposite, let your voice get real quiet and let your hands relax so the reins are relaxed and stretch your legs out and place them gently on his/her sides and just sit in one spot, for a few minutes letting your anger fall out of your ears or something, think of something funny he/she did then ask him/her to try again 
wow this is long lol 
*throws cookie if you read all the way to the bottom*
GOOD LUCK!!!!!!! and come up with your own calming strategies, every one and every horse is different


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## Emma7442 (Jan 19, 2008)

Thanks for the help everyone

I had a private lesson with my horse, it was short but it was REALLY helpful, and the lady was really nice (she was chesters old owner) I learnt about using my voice more then my hands. Its funny cause the lesson went so well then the day after i tried it again and totally messed up the job!

I guess everyone has their days.......


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## grayhorse (Jun 18, 2008)

*I understand*

I know how you feel, my horse Quest can be a wonderful ride one day and a pain the next sometimes. I get upset with him when he knows how to do something and just plan says No I don,t want to.And of course he seem to always make sure there is someone watching or so it seems, I have learn to just come to a stop and back him a few steps and stand a few sec and then ask him again, sometimes it takes more than once of this to get him lined out but I never leave it at NO I don.t want to, I always tell him I HAVE ALL DAY and we can do this till we get it right. Delbert,,,, is a whole diffent story He is very hard headed, and we have some real go rounds at times but I never allow him to run over me and I always stop when he does it right and pat and love him alittle , YOU ARE NOT ALONE in this one. Good luck. Grayhorse


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## Dumas'_Grrrl (Apr 2, 2008)

Greyhorse said it perfectly. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I have been frustrated and called my horses a few names...ALPO being one of them. lol If you can't get done what you set out to do that day...change what you planned on doing. End on a good note. Horses are a special gift and priveledge that we have and its best to always keep that in mind. EVEN if that means blowing off the goal for that day.


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## Jubilee Rose (May 28, 2008)

I agree that everyone has their days. When I fell off Jubilee a couple weeks ago, I was mad at her. I didn't yell or anything, it was kind of just a quiet anger. I got right back on though, I was gentle but firm and made her behave. But afterwards, I was still mad. Like I brought her into the barn and brushed her and stuff, but I didn't kiss her or pet her, or talk to her because I was angry, lol. I kind of give her the silent treatment and inwardly stew. I just needed time to cool off. A couple hours later, I was back to my old self, talking in a baby voice to her and telling her she was so cute, Lol. :wink: Don't give up. You love your horse and I'm sure he loves you. Just keep going!


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## grayhorse (Jun 18, 2008)

*Hows it going?*

I was just wondering how it was going? I hope well. I know dealing with horses can be so confusen as we love then so and yet we are wanting them to do well and if it does not work out it can be ... well we can lose sleep over it, or at least I do. I hope things are going better . Hang in there . You take to heart what the ladies say here . they know a thing or two .. let me know how you are. Grayhorse


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## LuLu (Sep 11, 2007)

I know exactly what you mean, because a similar thing happened to me the other day. My horse (who is usually really laid back) started kicking out when I went to put her back boots on, not standng still while I got, then she was completely ignoring in the arena, and I could feel myself getting more and more wound up, so I got off and led her back to the yard, because I just wasn't in the mood and it wasn't fair on her, then she started being naughty while I lead her (trying to cut across me in trot and setting her neck against me) and I did lose my rag with her  Afterwards, I felt devestated at how I had handled the situation, because that isn't how I work with horses, I believe in being quiet and patient (Intelligent Horsemanship), the Monty Roberts techniques. When you feel angry or frustrated at him, just close your eyes, clear your mind and take deep breaths, maybe think of a happy memory with your horse, and if you don't feel like riding, don't. 

I felt so angry at myself, because I knew it was my fault, she could sense how I was feeling and she was just reacting from that, so when I had untacked her, I gave her a big hug and I told her I was sorry, maybe that sounds a bit crazy, but I think she knew, because she was lovely after that  So don't give up, we all have bad days and good days. We all make mistakes, but you learn from them and move on  

Hope this helps x x x


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## *ArabianPrincess* (Nov 8, 2006)

Tips -

Get off the horse and have a good think about what you are doing.
Breath in breath out slow and steady... Don't get back on the horse until you think you are ready to be civil with him/her so to speak.


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