# The sad truth to a lot of stables these days



## bsms (Dec 31, 2010)

The best bet for handling drama is to ignore it. People like that ENJOY provoking a response from you. The more you get upset, the more she wins.


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## bubba13 (Jan 6, 2007)

It's not a horse barn thing. It's a people thing.


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## MyBoyPuck (Mar 27, 2009)

I can happily say that barn #10 still exists because I'm at it. We have about 30 boarders at our barn. Mostly adults. I can honestly say I have not experienced one issue of drama in the two years I've been there. People have differences in training & horse care, but nobody judges. Input is only given if it is asked for. Otherwise, people keep their mouth's shut. It's fantastic.


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## capercowgirl (Oct 14, 2011)

I am boarding at my friends barn now and it's great! Everyone is friends and we all support eachother. I'm glad that I finially have a barn where I'll be happy to go to everyday.


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

I've had my share of barn drama at our ex barn...:evil:

Luckily, we are now boarding at a private residence farm, and we are the only boarders there!! So we have the place to ourselves, with no one to mock us or talk behind our backs......The property owners are non horsey people who just love animals in general, and they are super helpful in regards to doing whatever the horses need (like buying them a $300 dollar 60 inch barn fan for the summer) and they leave us to make decisions about our horse's care and feeding and turnout ourselves.

We couldn't have asked for a better place to keep our horses.


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## AlexS (Aug 9, 2010)

It sounds a lot like high school - you deal with it by ignoring it and just walking away, don't even give it a second thought.


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## DuffyDuck (Sep 27, 2011)

My experience?
The first yard I learnt to ride at for 2 years, the old man liked younger girls. Thats all I'm saying on the subject.
The next yard was brilliant- at first. I broke my shoulder in a riding accident and spent 8 months with metal in my arm. When it came out, I started riding with a new women on the yard, I'll call her Sarah. Now, I bought a TBx 5yo who was completely unsuitable, and after 10 months sold her to someone with more experience. Then I bought my old horse Doey. She trained me, took me to my first competition, looked after me - everything. Then she had an affair. Her family where friends with my family, her husband was in Afghan when she did this, and when he got back he came to ours and broke down. My dad told him everything he knew.
This woman then made my life, as an 18yo, her being a 34 yo woman, an absolute misery.
My dad approached her, and told her to leave me alone ;I don't have a problem with you, I have a problem with your daughter.'
Now, i was at the yard with my parents all the time, and I cannot think of one thing I had done to **** this woman off.

In the end, I went to the police, there was a big investigation. To make it worse, she was investigation branch, so therefore police. She made my work life a misery. Despite her knowing the 'Whilst you're under investigation you keep your trap shut'rule she tried to influence my witnesses.

She cause a riding accident with myself, she spooked my dad's horse who did a full rear with my tiny mum leading her, she whipped my horses as I rode past her.

I moved. I have never experienced anything so horrific in my life.

THEN. New yard, August last year. People are there to WORK their horses. I have had a couple of issues which I ranted on here, but if you ignore it, and don't let it show how much it bothers you on the outside, they'll leave you be.

As bubba said, its not yards, its human nature.


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## VelvetsAB (Aug 11, 2010)

Its a people thing!

My line at work is FILLED with drama. 


Time to learn to deal with it now, so that it doesn't bother you as an adult.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## DuffyDuck (Sep 27, 2011)

VelvetsAB said:


> Its a people thing!
> 
> My line at work is FILLED with drama.
> 
> ...


 
Well said!

My work is supposed to be with adults... but you have to run around after them like children!


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## Country Woman (Dec 14, 2011)

That is great you finally found a barn for your horse that you like


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## SocietyJoe (Jan 21, 2011)

Being the younger girl at the stables is always hard on anyone. 

The first barn I experienced was pretty good; a little bit of bitching but nothing that nobody got mad about or it caused a huge drama. Although there were people who stayed for a couple of weeks and got behind on there rent so they left with out paying anything, this really used to **** mum off. Then there were the people who were there for a big show and treated the rest of us like we sucked and knew nothing about horses. I stayed there from age 9 - 13 so it was a good barn. 

That barn then changed owners, and since we were good friends with the people this didn't impact us at all. Many of the agistee's (spelling sorry) left, and the new owners started filling the stables with 2yo TB's and were training them for racing, this was fine with us untill the lease on my old pony was nearly up, and we had found a green OTT TB for me expand my learning and train. I think I kept Joe there for about a month untill we noticed that they were starting to treat me completley different and even put Joe in the yards with the babies so he would calm them down. I was mortified, and although they never said anything we felt as though they didn't have room for a girl who wanted to just have fun. 

We moved to my instructor at the time's barn; It was beautiful there with a big dressage arena, a round yard and my own paddock. I'm going to call her Indie(Instructor), Indie was having some husband trouble and was always coming to me with her problems, when they got a divorce the whole scene changed she was depressed and it really impacted me as a person, I just wanted to go there to ride and not become her personal therpist. We moved a year later after I stopped taking lesson's with her. 

I have now moved to the most perfect barn. I have two old style brick stables, a huge paddock, my own tack room, and the best part is that it's only me and an older lady who just rides for fun. I could not ask for anything better, its 5minutes away from my house, close to the Equestrian Centre and the public riding park. Joe is also alot happier in the company of older, more mature horses. (;


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## OuttatheBlue (Dec 8, 2011)

I'm sorry about your experiences! I find that almost every barn has some drama, some worse than others.

One place I went to the owners got MAD at my mom for cleaning our stall while I was riding, it was before I had my license so my mom had to drive me, she got bored waiting and wanted to help out.

I was in a really bad boarding situation for much longer than I should have been, I don't want to go more specific than that but the manager was verbally abusive to students and owners of horses. Getting my horse out was a nightmare.

The place I went after, I really liked (besides the owner, but I never saw her anyways). But one day, the owner decided that horses could only be turned out while the owners where there, and otherwise had to be locked in a stall, so I had to leave.

My current barn I LOVE. It's so perfect and the first barn I actually know and like everybody! There isn't a thing I would change about my current barn, except for them fixing the trail situation (which they're working on!)


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## sillyhorses (Sep 2, 2011)

I think we are one of the barn #10s, too  I think that is partly because most of our boarders are adults? We have had some not-exceptional business interactions where we've had to ask "Please remember to pick up after yourself, including removing your horse's manure from the arena... we've done it several times already for you, and thought we should remind you after this 6th time in a week..." where the person who wasn't following barn rules didn't like being reminded of them, but they reserved expressing their "disgust" over this to us, basically... Those types of things, where it isn't really drama... just annoying to us as the barn owners. 

Everybody we have here gets along well and supports one another! We really try to make sure people understand how we operate our facility before they come, and encourage them to make sure they choose a facility that best matches their "needs"... that helps weed out the people who just don't seem to fit in before they even come.  It is a hard situation you are in, but I agree with previous posts that the best thing to do is ignore the person. If you go to a show and have a problem with them harassing you, then turn them in to the show administrators.


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## Hunter65 (Aug 19, 2009)

My last barn was awesome but lonely as not very many people but no drama. I would still be there if the BO hadn't become afraid of my horse. He now lives at my trainers, which is good for him. Not much drama here either.

I must say that we have a romper room at work and it's filled with ladies ranging in the ages of 56 to 66.


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## HarleyWood (Oct 14, 2011)

well ive been to three barns the first we had a little pasture with 15 other horses and the BO and their daughter were mean and bred their horses all the time all were underweight and just a bad place. so we moved him and to my friends place and we had a blast but her dad was rude to him and kept commemting on what i did. we moved him to my other friends and then got another horse but i was finding saddle marks on them and one of their horses injured my new horse and blamed us and then their horse injured herself when we were there and they told EVERYONE we made her get hurt after we took care of her and stuff, so we moved them to our house and its all better now!

just hang in there!


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## csimkunas6 (Apr 18, 2010)

In my experience this type of thing happens just about everywhere, well for me anyways. But I think what bothers me more about it at the barn is that horses, and barn life is something that means so much to me, that it really upsets and bothers me when other people can be the same way. 

At the moment, knock on wood, lol, the barn Im at, and have had my yearling at since Ive moved back down to NC is a relatively drama free zone. Dont get me wrong the English riders and the Western riders comment about each other's discipline, which is fine for me, because I do both. But I have been at plenty of barns just like yours was. Sorry to hear about that, and hope it gets better if it hasnt already ;D


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## GhostwindAppaloosa (Jun 3, 2011)

we keep drama out of our barn. I've had to ask two boarders to leave because they couldnt behave, but I myself and the rest of my boarders are happy for it. One bad apple WILL spoil the bunch.


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## waresbear (Jun 18, 2011)

I have never boarded my horses, ever. However, I still hear about the drama, gossip and all the happenings at the 2 barns in my area that have indoor arenas. So, must be a common thing. I was considering moving my horses to self board facility with an indoor for a few months this spring so I could get a headstart on lessons, the drama thing I highly doubt would bother me.


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## capercowgirl (Oct 14, 2011)

I am really happy that I moved my mare to my friends house now that we ALL get along so well. We all went out on our horses today and it was a blast! I live in an area where we have a lot of boarding stables with indoors, and trainers and that seems to be the place where people have the problems. 

I just found out that the girl who caused all the problems with me at my old barn is now moved on to someone new and is causing even more problems..:roll: I guess some people never change, and she is getting a very bad reputation around the island at every stable I know of. She's been kicked out, fired, run out you name it.. 

When I look back and now don't have to deal with her drama, I feel bad for her and her horse because she is in the horse world for all the wrong reasons.


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## Lost without horses (Dec 29, 2011)

I prefer horses than people. Unfortunately the two often mix, remember this is your hobby; a place for peace and restitution. If u can't find it at that barn then move! No one should compromise their passion for abuse. I can't image what she does when you’re not looking. 
http://www.horsechitchat.com/equineforums/newreply.php?do=newreply&p=13311​


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## Lins (Nov 8, 2011)

I keep to myself. My horse is my business! I've dealt with a lot of crap at a lot of different barns. If I make new friends or contacts then great, but I stay out of any drama. Unless it involves my horse. That's completely different. Horse people can be so opinionated and nosey.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## tlkng1 (Dec 14, 2011)

csimkunas6 said:


> Dont get me wrong the English riders and the Western riders comment about each other's discipline, which is fine for me, because I do both. But I have been at plenty of barns just like yours was. Sorry to hear about that, and hope it gets better if it hasnt already ;D


I found that as long as the english and western riders have fun poking fun at each other it can actually be very entertaining  At another barn I was at, the western riders would get a little huffy if we english riders set up jumps around their barrels..even though we removed them immediately when we were done. When the owner of the barn offered up a back paddock that wasn't used for turnout for an "english" ring, everyone, english and western riders both, pitched in to help us clean up, clean out and spread a dozen truckloads of sand as well as moving in jump standards and poles and this was at the height of a New Orleans summer.

The barn I am at now is more of a lesosn barn so we have kids and adults from the ages of 7 - 60+. For the most part everyone gets along but as with any "crowd" we do have our occasional problems. Barn etiquette can be an issue, ie cleaning up after yourself and your horse, not taking things like leadropes and halters off of another stall, leaving your equipment on top of MY tack box etc. I have said many times that if it is an emergency or if you need a lead rope or even a halter, sure, take mine off the stall but at least return it.


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## OTTB Lover (Jan 1, 2012)

I am currently at a barn, that when I iniatially came to there were very few boarders. Everyone minded their own business for the most part. Of course there were a few things, but it was mainly just the barn manager complaining here and there about her boss the barn owner. Then more boarders started to come in. At first it was nice to have new friends, new people to ride and talk with. However one of the new boarders is a big "pot stirrer". She started to say things here and there regarding the care the horses were receiving from the barn owner. She was questioning feeding schedules, training methods, treatment of the barn manager and staff, the list goes on. She started to drag in a lot of people. Staff and BM are kinda "feeding into it" also. I will admit myself included at first. However I started to realize that some things were being dramatized and some things were downright lies. The proof is in the pudding...the pudding in this case is my 16.3hh OTTB who is a notoriously hard keeper...and is at a great weight, and is the happiest and healthiest I have ever seen him. Then a lot of things happened at once between two workers, and lets just say [email protected]$ hit the fan. It turned into he said, she said, you said, we said. This pot stirrer actually tried to pit people against each other and proceeded to text me crap about my friend, and then text my friend crap about me while we were standing next to each other. Yes...this woman is in her 50's....They are continously talking about the barn owner, and it is getting bad. 
I really like this barn, I really like the barn owner and trainer. They have been nothing but good to me and my horse. Of course there have been differences of opinions as to how things should be done, but I am an adult, I do what I am going to do regarding my horse (everyone has an opinion about horses), but this is high school stuff. Let me promise you...none of us are close to high school age.
Just a rant...not sure what to do, it is just frustrating.


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## capercowgirl (Oct 14, 2011)

I agree OTTB. People don't need to be in highschool to act like a child lol. Sometimes its hard to ignore it because it is being directed right at you.


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## LadyNeigh (Jul 16, 2011)

What a horrid person!!

There used to be a girl at our stables whos mum was horrid. I used to have to share a field with them. The BO told her to put electric fencing up a bit further away from the real fencing that split our horses to the BO's. But she refused. I couldn't do anything cos I have no electric tape. Anyway...
my horse got stuck in the fence- this is why the BO wanted the tape up. Yeah bout £1000 in vet bills and it was all 'her' fault.
Luckily theyve left the stables (got kicked out). That girl iis really horrid now- shes used to be really quite nice.

Happy New Year guys!!


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## DressageIsToDance (Jun 10, 2010)

The only two barns I've ever been to that did not have drama were my old and favorite trainer's barn. It was a very small place, and it was really just her personal barn that she had opened up to a small amount of boarders, and she leased some of her horses and gave lessons. There were younger girls, but there were adults too, but there was never any silliness or drama. Nobody was made to feel bad for what they could or could not do - they just got out there and worked for a personal best.

The other one was NOT a good barn. There was never hardly anyone there to start drama, and the manager was a jerk who pretended to know eeeeevvverrryyything about horses - pretended he'd been all over the country/world riding and he really just started locally and had less experience than most of the boarders. He'd get on the internet and read things and come back to us with all this new and "great" information and attempt to force us to use it on our horses. There was no drama over this guy because everyone blindly followed his lead! Why I don't know...but not all no-drama barns are good.

The barn I'm at now has it's moments of drama but overall I am much happier here than anywhere else. The last two barns Amber was at, the managment would always try to tell me what to do with my horse, and would make decisions for me. I'm not opposed to hearing advice, but I want my word on something for my horse to ultimately be what is done if I say so. And it never was at the last two barns, I'd ask for something to be done, and it never got done, or things would be done for my horse that I did not authorize.

The barn we are at now I have never had a problem with something being done that I didn't want or something not being done that I asked for. Save some serious trouble with the people who I call "stable hands" who were hired to feed/turn out/clean stalls. They've done some annoying things but as far as the person in charge - no problems!


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## Maple (Jan 10, 2012)

I hear you! I moved my horse to a racing stable 5 months ago and it couldn't have gone better. I was sick to death of the catty know alls. I do miss having people to go riding with, but the pros greatly outweigh the cons as far as I'm concerned. For the most part all the horses are finished working by 12noon, which means I have full run of all the facilities. 

I was deeply offended by a group of people.. or "friends" if you may at the last yard, who really let me down when I really needed them. It was to the extent that I had bad feelings towards them and didnt want to be at the yard.. so I made the decision that for my own sanity a move was in order.


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## mystykat (Dec 4, 2011)

It's really hard to ignore things like that. Luckily I only deal with gossips and trouble makers at work. 
My boarding stable is very private. 10 or so boarders and they come to ride and work with their horses and that's all. It's very nice. Half the time I go to work with my horse and I don't even have to share the arena.


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## Kawonu (Apr 24, 2011)

Barn drama is dreadful. A girl I used to know who rode there went through horses like they were mere clothing. She was so stuck up that, when I stopped riding English, she had the nerve to tell me I didn't need to board my horse there if all I was doing was riding western. All I can say is what others have said - ignore her. It's fairly clear she has a jealousy issue, as well as being somewhat narcissistic attitude.

If she wants to make an *** out of herself, let her. Keep riding, and pretend she's not there if you happen to see her around. People like that aren't worth your time.


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## goldrushx (Dec 15, 2009)

There's less than 8 under 16s at my barn. Twice as many adults, and I assure you as an inbetweener (I'm 16 and talk to both the adults and children at a direct level) the adults are twice as bad for drama!!! The kids will have little fall-outs over who text who and what-not but adults get passionate over the most silly of things and will write immature, cocky, pointless notes on the notice-board! It drives me up the wall and sets a bad example to the younger ones! xx


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