# Plus sized and scared



## shellyfrompa (May 28, 2012)

I was a horse rider for years before my 20's, now that i am 51 and over 300 pounds, got a few bumps and pains from falling off or being flung off i just cant seem to get the nerve to go riding. i know its all in my head but i really want to get out there, i do drive but its not the same.


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## BigGirlsRideWarmbloods (Mar 28, 2010)

shellyfrompa said:


> I was a horse rider for years before my 20's, now that i am 51 and over 300 pounds, got a few bumps and pains from falling off or being flung off i just cant seem to get the nerve to go riding. i know its all in my head but i really want to get out there, i do drive but its not the same.


I am in a very similar boat. I am 34, but I had a super bad fall Christmas of 2012 about a year and a half ago. By bad fall, I mean in a wheelchair for a month, on crutches and canes for months BAD FALL. In addition I bred my mare, and so she now has a foal by her side and she hasn't been ridden in 9 months.

I really amd just super scared. I've read articles and books and I know in my head it wasn't that bad, and I survived, but when it comes down to it, I am scared.

I wonder if I should be happy with being grounded and stick to breeding and foal raising? Or should I get someone to work with my mare who is young and bounces and is fearless untill she is in back in a good frame of mind.

I can empathize with you. I may be 34 but that fall has premenently wrecked parts of my left knee, right ankle and lower back. In addition at a show last month my mare crushed my left foot, and I have lost feeling in a 2" X 2" square from the middle of my left big toe going left.

We'll get through it togeather!


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## Skyseternalangel (Jul 23, 2011)

Finding an instructor will help you out sooo much, I promise.

I was terrified too when I got bucked off (and it wasn't even that bad a fall.. but I could have snapped my neck and gotten paralyzed) but a good instructor really turned me around and I'm much more confident now.


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## DimSum (Mar 28, 2012)

Skyseternalangel said:


> Finding an instructor will help you out sooo much, I promise.
> 
> I was terrified too when I got bucked off (and it wasn't even that bad a fall.. but I could have snapped my neck and gotten paralyzed) but a good instructor really turned me around and I'm much more confident now.


Totally agree. Getting good instruction on a quiet school horse will go a very long way to reestablishing confidence.


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## sarahver (Apr 9, 2010)

shellyfrompa said:


> I was a horse rider for years before my 20's, now that i am 51 and over 300 pounds, got a few bumps and pains from falling off or being flung off i just cant seem to get the nerve to go riding. i know its all in my head but i really want to get out there, i do drive but its not the same.


Another option might be to investigate and see if there are any therapeutic riding centers nearby. They're always looking for volunteers, of all experience levels. You could start by just being around horses again, re-familiarize yourself with them and see how you go before jumping back in the saddle. The horses at these centers are the sweetest, most well mannered equines going around, they have precious cargo to look after!

It is also a very rewarding experience for you, too. I have volunteered with these organizations before, it's truly one of the most worthwhile things you can do wih horses, and a lot of fun to boot! Good luck!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Dreamcatcher Arabians (Nov 14, 2010)

I'm 55 years old, rode all the rank ones in my younger days, so totally get the aches and pains thing. If you can go work with an instructor and tell them you're terrified and need confidence help, they'll put you on a good horse that won't scare you but will get you going again. 

I've never been so scared I couldn't ride, but driving? OHMYGOD NOT EVEN MAYBE! LOL! The idea of being voluntarily drug behind a horse, even in a cart, is just so not on for me! 

Just think of all the fun and socialization you're missing by NOT riding, that will help you make that first step. I can't imagine not taking lessons, going for trail rides, horse camping and all that fun stuff. 

And BGRW, that is a HORRENDOUS accident. Don't try to make it less than it was. If it wasn't that big a deal, you wouldn't be so scared to get back up. I've never been put in a wheelchair by a horse and I've had some GAWD awful wrecks where I thought twice about getting back on the horse. With your injuries, I'm not so sure I ever would have. 

I can tell you all about crush injuries to the foot. I had one a couple years ago and I'm still having problems from it. It was a MAJOR crush, 3 surgeries and compartment syndrome later: I still have my foot, still can't wear most of my old shoes from pre-crush days, still have pain where I can feel and still can't move my toes. It was the worst pain I've ever had. It has made me very demanding that horses stay out of my space and very intolerant of stupid behaviour on the lead line. 

So, don't feel like you're all alone ladies, I think as we get older we realize that we don't bounce as well as we once did and that it hurts worse for longer. Just put on your hard hats and get on up there, just go with an instructor who will put you on a school horse who will care for you until you get your nerves all back together and in the right place. You CAN do it.


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## heymckate (Nov 23, 2010)

I agree with the posters who suggested a good lesson program/instructor with a nice, reliable horse and the suggestion of volunteering at a therapeutic riding center. Both are great confidence builders that will leave you feeling great!

Good luck!


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## Golden Horse (Feb 20, 2010)

You can do this, there are many of us addicts, older, frailer, fatter more sensible than our skinny "old selves" 

Don't compare yourself to the person you once where, start with a clean sheet now, now expectations of yourself, just to enjoy horses.

I started just working on ground work and grooming, just enjoying my horses, and built on that a small step at a time, how small

1) wear riding clothes around the house and in the barn, start to feel like a rider.

2) as part of ground work get the horse used to a mounting block, you are NOT going to be riding, just getting a horse stood next to the block, leaning over etc etc.

3) when all of that becomes fun and stress free then mount, dismount, enjoy

4) Mount small walk dismount enjoy'.

It is by such small steps that I get myself back in the saddle every time I have a wobbly, sometimes it takes a while, sometimes I can breeze through it all in a day or two:lol:


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## Country Woman (Dec 14, 2011)

I am 48 and have not ridden for a long time 
I just began a lease last month and now have a saddle and everything 
I need 
hope to be riding soon hopefully today


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## DimSum (Mar 28, 2012)

@Country Woman...you and I are in the same boat. I'm older returning myself, and my husband is a beginner. I haven't ridden for a decade. I meant to lease, but ended up buying a horse for each of us.  at very least it's been interesting!


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## HiddenOaksMoms (May 30, 2012)

I know its not just an age thing either. At 14 my daughter wanted to ride so bad she worked to lease a horse. The barn owner saw something in her and encouraged her to show. She came in 10th in Ontario Western Pleasure with less than 6 months riding. She the was thrown into the barn wall, her leg was stepped on and she dislocated her elbow. She is now terrified. She took her first lesson in 6 years and it took 45 mins of crying to get in the saddle. Its a beginning.










this was in 2007


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