# The Chronicles of a Sassy Mare Named Daphne



## MistressToMares (Jul 26, 2018)

I couldn’t come up with a good thread title for the life of me!! Lol

In this thread I will share how Daphne came to be mine and the transformation that has happened between our first day together and today.

First a bit about Daphne! 

Daphne is a 13 year old shire/tb cross. Sire is a 17h shire named Tiny and dam is a TB mare.

The big bay babe whom is my very best friend came into my life two years ago, when I was least expecting it. The goal was to get her back in shape and help sell her for a family friend of mine. At first we didn’t really click. I was still heart broken after loosing my last horse to neurological issues. 

I have known this mare since she was 1 and used to work with her sire an full sister who went on to become an event horse. 

It was a super cold winter when I first trudged out in the snow to see her and quickly realized I was going to have my work cut out for me.

Daphne’s owner at the time didn’t have the time for her, had moved further away and was seeing her maybe once a month when she paid board and would leave money for grain. The gal just had way to much on her plate and for the past two years prior had been super unsure about selling her so she had just sat.

This amazing horse looked like a completely different horse from that first day compared to today. I didn’t expect her to make such a turn around!

From the age 3-9 she had been started a couple times, maybe 5-10 rides each time and then would be put on the back burner and turned back out for a year or two. So when I got her she hadn’t be worked with in over two years. She had been handled, brushed and her feet kept up and the yearly vet visit, but quite literally the bare minimum.

When I tell people her story and go into the neglect I can’t help but laugh cause she wasn’t the typical case, not skinny and not abused.... but the fatest thing you had ever seen and for sure you would think this horse had foundered I the past. Nope! Not this girl!

It took me weeks to gain her trust enough for me to touch her past her shoulder. She would bite and kick out and swing away or into me. I started just basic ground work and soon realized how great motivated she was and that helped her and I bond a bit more. I still was in the sell this horse mode mentally and emotionally.

Ground work lead to longer and longer sessions where after I could touch her, pet her and eventually fully groom her. She finally learned that just standing there she would get doted on for a good hour and if she stood nice a quite she would get treats in her bin at the end of the session. 

I started getting her used to moving her body more and more. From groundwork we went to walking up and down, trotting up and down the pasture hill and eventually got her brace enough to venture off the property and started hand walking her an hour everyday on trails, the road...anywhere I could. 

Soon enough I had her tacked up and walking up to the horse park, she was excited to go out and always willing to work and loved her grooming sessions by now. I started working her in the round pen up at the horse park after a 20 minutes walk in the woods. After a week or so I had her going under Saddle!

Our first ride was in the round pen in a rope halter and it was that first ride I new what a great horse she was. No offer to buck, kick out. Lazy but willing to walk and trot. From there we progressed beautifully to riding home from the round pen to warming up in the round pen under saddle and then venturing to the big arena and riding home to eventually riding her to the park and then our first “real” trail ride in a arena I had yet to ride her in with 300 acres of trails and she was a champ!you would never know she’d never been on a hour long trail ride.

Now remember she is still for sale during all of this.

Walk trot we had down pretty well. 

By this time it’d been 6? 7 months? And I was getting ready to list her for sale. I really liked her at the point and enjoyed and looked forward to working her but still wasn’t ready to own again yet. It was a nice free of charge to me way of getting my horse fix and I’d be getting a check at the end from her sale. 

Then my mom saw how happy I was and started pestering me 
“Don’t you want your own horse again?” 
“She seems to really like you, you enjoy her don’t you?”

Then the owner started sneaking lines in when we would talk like “well when are you showing your horse?” “ I would love to come see Daphne and you work together” I rode her in a show later on and she referred to her as mine the whole day, I just laughed and thought it sweet. But still was in the mindset to sell her. I wasn’t ready. It hurt to much emotionally.

Then we did a clinic together and the clinician was in love with the two of us and how insync we where and how she really got confidence from the way I was riding her but pushing her. 

A few weeks later I started jumping her, by now we could tack up and ride out and have a wonderful ride to the park, ride in the arena and come home calmly and both of us feeling proud. I started taking lessons on her and through this whole time I was talking with her owner, saying here is the info, the pictures, the price let’s put the add up.....and she would t really say yes. It wouldn’t really say no... now it’s august of 2017 and I’m getting an earful from my coach, her owner and my mom....and the barn ladies would I’d gotten to know very well.

Daphne’s owner came over one day and presented me with a gift.....”I want you to have Daphne. I don’t want to sell her. I want her to be happy. She loves you and you have done so good by her, better than I have in her whole lifetime.”

I was shocked. I really didn’t see this coming. But while standing there I realized there wasn’t one part of me that was saying NO. In fact I was smiling and my heart felt light again. I said I need to think about it, run the numbers to be sure I can afford this. She and I agreed I’d call her in the next couple days. I left the barn with the biggest butterflies in my chest.

I slept on it over night, discussed it with friends, my coach and family who all knew what was going on. 
Not a single person said no and reminded me how happy I was with my progress with her, a sense of accomplishment after how tragically my gelding had ended his life and hurt me. 

The next day I talked with the barn owner about what may happen and got her approval and permission to keep boarding Daphne there. I went home and ran the numbers. Called my friends again to see if I was truly crazy. But really I was excited. I called her owner and we agreed to meet for coffee near my house. She brought a sale document and her registration papers. We talked for awhile and signed the papers. Then she handed me a check for six lessons with my coach. She said it was a thank you for helping her see Daphne was wanting to work, wanting her own person and said she saw that she chose me months ago and just was trying to figure out how to approach me about taking her on. I had a horse. My own horse again. I couldn’t believe it.

So that is the story on how I got my big girl!

Now my second horse, Millie. Or Moo as I call her. Moo is my 24 year old 14.3 hand seal bay Morgan/QH cross 
4-H pony who I got when I was 11 years old. She was my grand champion jumper at 3ft and reserve grand champion in training level dressage at fair. This little girl shaped me to be the rider I am today. Granted I had been riding 7 years prior and have owned a handful since then she was my best friend...still is. She kept me sane when I was in middle school and my freshman year in high school. 

When I was 11 my mom pulled me out of school on day and said she had a surprise for me, see the week before we had gone out to what felt like the middle of no where and where looking at horses for me. I had gotten on and ridden a few but nothing really spoke to me. My mom stood there and watched the whole time. Right before we left my mom asked about the little black horse tied up who outsiders the hitching post. “That one has stood there quietly the whole time we have been there” 
We quickly found out that she had just been brought in the night before and they had yet to know much about her. But mom pushed and we saddled her up and I rode her around. This horse was smooth, listened and apparently I must have had a big smile on my face. We rode her away from the other horses and she was heard bound... I knew that was it, mom was gonna say no. (I had just been through a few rough months with my first horse who we ended up selling cause I just wasn’t ready for that Spivey of a horse yet) so any horse acting up made my mom nervous (still does lol) 
We left and I had zero clue that in the next few days my mom had thought long and har, called a friend and asked their honest opinion (they had gone with us that day to try horses out) arranged with the owner of the sale barn to haul her all the way to Vashon...for me...as a early birthday present. 

So I’m siting in the car not exactly sure why I’m pulled out of school but they I didn’t really want to question it! In front of us was a big stock trailer.... I didn’t think much of it..mom didn’t say anything until we fallowed this big trailer into the driveway of my friends house....I looked at her and she said this is your surprise. 

I couldn’t get out of the car fast enough.
The back opened, and this little black fuzzy pony came out bickering at me, calm as could be. I honestly don’t remember much else after that cause I was so full of excitement. But I’m sure we spent that whole day together. 

What people don’t know is this little fuzzy black mare kept me going through some of the toughest middle school years. 

I would sit on her before the school bus would come. She was and still is my best friend who knows when I just need a hug. She always greets me with a nicker. 

When I out grew her from my 4H years I passed her onto a gal who needed a safe steady bomb proof mount (and as long as no UPS trucks around she was great!) she did her job all over again, when the time came she had her title change to “school horse” and took on so many kids and adults on. She taught more then I can even imagine. Was grand champion many times over at the local saddle club. Giving confidence to those unsure, testing those who thought they knew and bringing smiles to everyone around. 

When I got the opportunity to have her come back and live out her years with me again this summer, it was a short phone call to my mom and within five minutes it was decided. 

Who knows where this little fuzz ball came from before she landed in my lap, we have our suspicions that she was trained in barrel racing cause....well she can turn and burn around barrels! This horse was put on this earth to help the broken, give strength to those who feel weak and to stand with those who just need a friend. 

Thank you Millie for being the best little mare ever. 

24 looks good on you. Here is to many more amazing years!

Fast forward to today, Millie is back home with me living out her retirement. Is the sweetest old soul. Still very talkative and loves to go on trail rides and get kisses. 

Daphne and I are in a tough spot in training due to too much time off. I got in a really bad depression spell and then on a two week vacation. So she’s having a hard time coming back to work. But I have a clinic lesson Sunday morning with a well known dressage trainer that my coach works with so I’m excited and hopeful. 

Here are some transformation photos of daphne from when I started working her to now. And of course of the sweet old girl. This thread will mostly be about Daphne but I’ll prolly share pictures of Moo as well.


----------



## MistressToMares (Jul 26, 2018)

*Millie Moo Pictures*

Just a few pictures of my Moo


----------



## Phantomrose (Jul 25, 2016)

I am so happy you started a journal!  I look forward to reading every entry, and look forward to hearing about your progress with Daphne. I am sure Sunday will be a good day for you both as well. Hears hoping to many other entries, so you can look back, read, and smile about your growth as a rider and partner for your mare (and hope there’s more about Millie aka Moo as well!) 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## MistressToMares (Jul 26, 2018)

*Clinic review and exciting news!*

It’s been in insane 4 days and I tried to update the journal Sunday night but fell asleep! Lol I work at a barn an hour away from where I live and have to be up at 430 am and then work from 7am to 4pm then drive home! Lol 

The clinic was amazing, I really hope my coach Audrey gets her out more this coming year so once we are past this herd boundance issue we can really work on my body position and canter work for Daphne!

I had to ride Daphne to the horse park to meet the trailer that was taking us to the clinic...

Daphne the drama queen as she is called these days......was an udder **** getting to park. Spooking, spinning, screaming.... so I was like fine we will work in the arena while we wait for the trailer to show up...proceeding to try to full blown buck me off 4 times... I actually was nervous for the first time on her.

Get her loaded up and to Audrey’s and she comes out of the trailer as if she was a seasoned horse who’d done this all her life. No screaming no freaking out... just tied and ate her hay....I’m thinking greatttt your going to be perfect when I really need your true colors to show.

She stood tied nicely for an hour before our lesson....not a peep out of her. No pawing. No pooping, no nothing... 

So I bridle her up and right away her lower lip goes crazy with the nervous lip flapping. So I talk to her and we walk to the arena and then the screaming starts... so I did some ground work and she is wiggly and all over the place. Audrey had to hold her to have me get on and she tried to bolt the second I got on... 

I told molly what was going on and my frustration and concerns and goals and she was right there in the middle with us and got bag of cookies and had her focus on her and when she listened and looked for her she got a cookie. And we worked through it and it was amazing!

Molly came and stood in the middle with me as I walked/trotted in a 10-15 meter circle around her and we just focused on her paying attention to us, not what was going on outside the arena. She would say “hellllloooo” in a welcoming/inviting sweet voice and open her body to her and when daphne would give molly her eye, her attention she would get a good girl, scratches and a cookie. We wher able to get to the point where it wasn’t a cookie every time and and could focus for 10 minutes at time at the walk and trot before having a worry wart meltdown screaming episode. Lol poor girl is so insecure right now.

I have a lot of ground work to do and hand walked her home from the park and had to march her butt back to the trails once we where at the end and hit the road cause acted up and she was way better the second time. 

On the way back through the trails I made sure to be the leader. I would walk and then suddenly stop and if she didn’t stop right away she had to backwards and quickly and then stand and it got to point where I could play with the speed of my step, slow walk, fast walk and even some running and I’d randomly and quickly stop at any given time and she had to respect and respond to my body langue and pay attention to me. It was really good and I left better about our walk home the the past few weeks.

The outcome therory we came up with is she suddenly became this way after I came back from my vacation it’d been 6 weeks off from riding and she felt abandoned and it was like when Michele abandoning her and she didn’t have a leader and her routine was completely thrown out the window...so it now makes sense (I was majorly depressed for 6 weeks but took a 2 week vacation during that time as well) 




The SUPER exciting news is my mom approached me with a surprise, she is paying for boarding at my trainer barn and she moves next Tuesday afternoon! This means I’ll be so much safer while riding, I’ll be able to have an actual riding schedule and have a lit closed arena to ride in! Holy smokes!

The other good news is that I got a second job cleaning pastures for $80 a weekend (730am-9am) so I can finally save some money or get the things I really need for her.

I found a new bit I’m really wanting to get her and try out as well. It’s a rubber three piece loose ring but not fat and chunky! I’m very curious to see what she makes of it and it’s only $35 so if it isn’t right for her I’m not breaking the bank.

The other other good news....her new smartpak order came in, and she starts the smart diegest ultra, smart omega and smart tranquility tomorrow!! Hallelujah! 

Here is to hoping things get better!

Also some pictures!


----------



## gottatrot (Jan 9, 2011)

She is a lovely girl! Both your mares are. Looking forward to reading more of your story.


----------



## Phantomrose (Jul 25, 2016)

I’m glad that you got what you needed from the clinic, and it’s happy news to hear that you’re moving to the new barn next Tuesday, and that the Smartpaks arrived! Woohoo! I hope for the best for the move. Let us know what happens.  


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## MistressToMares (Jul 26, 2018)

*3 month update. Such a happy girl*

Not much to share, some pictures. I got Daphne close to me at work back living in a pasture where she is back to being so happy! 

Two weeks ago we had our new vet (after so many issues with our original vet) and she got the all clear to come back to work!

So from here on out I’m hoping to be documenting her come back.

We have an amazing indoor arena and hot wash rack, beautiful lockers. The facility is simply amazing! I have never felt so at ease, if I had the money I would move my other horse there in a heart beat but they can not be pastured together. 

This last weekend she got a spa and complete make over. A good mane pull, a body clip and good scrubbing with hot water after. She looks like a different horse!


----------



## whisperbaby22 (Jan 25, 2013)

What a beautiful horse.


----------



## MistressToMares (Jul 26, 2018)

*Poor Daphne is sick*

Well I’ve yet to get a bill from today’s weekend call as my poor girl had developed a cough and snotty nose and low grade fever.... so we went ahead with a round of IM antibiotics for her. Both sides of her haunches got a big needle and tube of thick antibiotic. She has to have a second round Tuesday or Wednesday. She was bucking in the isle way 😳 

I’ll be out tomorrow to check on her and she sassy attitude. She might be sick but boy she is still full of it!


----------

