# Changing barns causes bunched panties



## waresbear

*hand is out for freshed baked cookies.....


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## AQHSam

Me too. And I hope this resolves itself quickly.


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## caseymyhorserocks

Well, I hope it turns out well for you. Personally, I would move your horse despite the injury, unless the vet says not to or he can walk without anything more than slight stiffness. What type of cookies? I want one!


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## cakemom

I'll take a cOokie!! I'm sure they wouldn't insure them anyway if they knew they were not safely housed, and they are not. 
These are not inexpensive horses either, each of them is an investment....so she will have to get over it I say!! 
Can I have milk too?
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## drafts4ever

Ummmm cookies can be a mix. *hands out fresh cookies* I'll just bake everything. As for Milk yeah sure! Fridge is that way *points*. 

I'm finding out from the vet tomorrow if I can move him. He doesn't know how to haul. He hasa bad shoulder injury and when it was assessed when it happened the vet said he wouldn't be sound to haul for 4-6 weeks. This is only two weeks later and he's not sound to safely haul.

I'm just don't get how she can even think her place is safe for horses! Yeah the stable side might be secure but there is no protection from falling debris from the damage and that's not safe at all! Not to mention the loud flapping metal that scares the crap out of the horses. She herself said she was worried about colic because of it. Moving my horses is safety and preventative because they are in a bad situation! If I could snap and have them moved in a second I would have done it the minute the arena came down but I'm not magic. I'm doing what I can to get them into a better place and as quickly as possible and yes I understand she's under a lot of stress but taking it out on other people is no way to keep a boarder anyway even if it was a safe environment!


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## GhostwindAppaloosa

financial issues can cause extreme stress and if things are as bad as they are you leaving is a huge financial burden on them and their family life. despite that It does sound that their care is possibly in question? that is more what i would be concerned about is retaliation from the daughter. perhaps you need to voice the concerns to the dad?


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## drafts4ever

Her dad completely understands why I'm leaving. He's upset about the arena collapsing and he knows it's going to take a lot to fix what's been done but he has no issues with boarders leaving because of this. He's more upset about the damage. I can't go to him about his daughters issues because she'll run him over. He just doesn't bother with that. Not me but previously others have brought up her issues maturity wise and cold shoulder attitude and he's confronted her only to get the cold shoulder and silent treatment back from her. She's really just a little kid when it comes to confronting her about things. Which is why I really wish I could find another trainer all together for Pinto. 
Besides her bad attitude in the situation, the last thing her dad needs right now is her attitude to deal with. I feel bad they are in the situation they are in but I'm not staying. 
I brought up my care concerns with him in terms of grain and feeding and what not. He said he doesn't feed outside of what my horses would get. He only feed breakfast and then turns horses out. Besides that he's in the other barns and rarely around the barn my girls are in. Everything from 10am on through the day is up to my trainer.


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## waresbear

You don't really want to stay in a place that has a fallen down structure right next to your horse, it's an eyesore when to you when are there. Also the BO slamming down feeding scoops & giving the silent treatment, oh smack her! Thanks for the cookies, now I have a craving for fresh baked cookies, phooey.


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## drafts4ever

I would love to smack her but only after Lestat is moved. I'm not seriously going to do it but I'm 13 years or so younger than her and my maturity level is way more. I can't begin to think of a valid reason to do that. Especially to someone you want to remain at least your client. I'm going to start looking at pinto trainers. Even if there's one 30 minutes away I'd like to find a different one. If I can't, she's a good trainer for that however right now I just want to get out of there.

you're very welcome for the cookies!


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## Joe4d

first of all this is a business relationship. Stop acting like you have to justify anything. DOnt argue dont do anything. What does your lease say. Probably that you have to give notice. That is it. "I am moving" you should never have even gotten into a discussion of why. I am moving, period end of discussion. The whys totally dont matter, You could be moving because you dont like the color of the barn. It doesnt matter, your horse, your money. Stop worrying about what they think, or having to justfy anything.


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## drafts4ever

Oh I don't give a crap about what they think. I'm moving my horses and I made that very clear. 
The point is I'm tired of hearing the SH%t she's trying to pull, justifying things or not. It's not safe for horses. she apparently doesn't understand that. Now my personal thoughts are worries on Lestat. If the vet says he's absolutely unable to be safely hauled to a new location at this time then what's going to happen to him while he stays at the current place until he's sound to move. I gave notice. I said I'm moving my girls Tuesday and Lestat as well if the vet says he can.
Either way whether I explained my reason to leave or not just giving notice as I have in turn receives a cold shoulder and her blubbering back and forth on why she doesn't want to loose a border and this and that. It's unavoidable unless I jumped in my car the second she opens her mouth and just leave and then don't come back until the day I move them which with my nerves, I need to be there to check on my horses knowing the wall of the arena could now come down into their pasture! Believe me I tried to change the conversation, I tried to walk away and mess with my little boy, I interrupted and asked if she needed help with stalls. Instead of going along and talking about something different she was relentless on why I shouldn't leave. I'm tired of it. So originally I was leaving the 5th of next month, now I'm leaving on Tuesday. It's immature and inappropriate. I don't want to hear it from her. It makes the whole situation worse. 
The other point I don't get is how she could possibly think her nasty attitude towards this would even remotely change my mind and make me want to stay! It's not even bully talk, it's more like a 5 year old throwing a verbal tantrum because she didn't get her lollipop at the mall.


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## Nitefeatherz

She might not even be thinking about changing your mind. She might just figure that you are leaving regardless so why bother being nice? Especially if she sees what you are doing as a sort of "abandonment"... 

It sounds as if she just doesn't have a lot of people skills. It also sounds as if she needs to work on developing better methods of coping with stress. 

You said you are leaving Tuesday...did you ever hear back from the vet about how long for your injured furkid to be able to be moved?


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## drafts4ever

I'll be seeing or at least talking to the vet tomorrow. He's supposed to be coming out to give him a laser treatment. Today he was prancey and mobile so I'm hoping the vet has good news. 
Here's what I think about my trainer based on what she's told me and what I've witnessed. Outside of horses ever since she was a kid she did nothing. It was school and then back to the barn. Her PE credits were riding and teaching lessons through high school. Outside of horses and showing she had no social life except for the once at the barn with her boarders and students. When the barn was given to her it was under her control however her family still owns the property. Out of the three barns on the property this one is hers and her "baby" so to speak. Still well into her adult life there is no social life outside of the barn and shows. She doesn't have control over much else so she tries to take control over what she has i.e the barn, horse in training, lessons...
When she starts to loose that control she can't cope well and because of her lack of social skills she does whatever she can to get rid of stress. So when someone goes out to do something away from her, someone she's become attached to she gets upset. I honestly don't think she understands how she comes off to other people. She doesn't have control over much so she tries to control everything and when it turns out she can't it bothers her more than it should.


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## thesilverspear

That's a bummer. Hopefully the vet will give you the okay to move your colt sooner rather than later. 

I've always felt that it was time to move barns whenever you started to feel like you needed to be your horse's advocate to the barn owner instead of feeling like you and the barn owner were on the same side in terms of the horse's care. Not a good feeling, when you have concerns about your horse's care and feel you need to be at loggerheads with the BO over various issues.


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## mildot

I'll be brutally honest.

I don't understand why people let a service provider treat them that way.

I wouldn't put up with this crap for more than it would take me to find a different barn, certainly not a year or more.


> My trainer is incredibly difficult to describe but I will do the best I can. There's threads buried on here about frustrations I've previously had and taken care of with her. For the last year I've had no issues which was great until now. She's incredibly immature when faced with a decision or situation she has no control over. She throws silent treatments, talks sH&t, rants, mumbles grumbles, and then gets headaches and blames everything on something or somebody else.


I also do not understand why these situations are so full of drama.

If I were in your shoes I would not engage this "trainer" in any discussions about why you are leaving. It is none of her business. Whether she agrees with your assesment of the barn's physical condition or not is completely irrelevant.


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## franknbeans

mildot said:


> I'll be brutally honest.
> 
> I don't understand why people let a service provider treat them that way.
> 
> I wouldn't put up with this crap for more than it would take me to find a different barn, certainly not a year or more.
> 
> 
> I also do not understand why these situations are so full of drama.
> 
> If I were in your shoes I would not engage this "trainer" in any discussions about why you are leaving. It is none of her business. Whether she agrees with your assesment of the barn's physical condition or not is completely irrelevant.


While I tend to agree, remember, the OP has one horse who may not be able to move right now. So, I can certainly understand why she is placating her at the moment. I am not really sure why wait until Tuesday, but there must be a really good reason. I also understand that over time, regardless of the trainers attitude, you develop a relationship with people. Perhaps she is difficult, but she does have some knowledge that the OP can use, which makes it a little tough to totally blow her off until a new trainer can be found. We all know that many trainers can be "difficult" at times, and we have to blow it off to achieve the greater goal. I certainly would never do anything but try to appease someone who is responsible for my horses-even for a couple more days. After we are gone-anything goes, and yeah-a good [email protected]# slap is in order, :wink:IMO.:wink:


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## Lockwood

I agree with both franknbeans and mildot, and it is a hard situation for you to be in. 
So, did the cookies turn out to be tasty? Any left?
Hope the vet visit goes well!


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## mom2pride

waresbear said:


> *hand is out for freshed baked cookies.....


 
ooh...me too!!! :lol: Dang..what an ordeal!!! 

I hope you get things sorted out very soon!!! There is absolutely no way you can move your colt sooner??? I would not want to leave him there with someone so uh...emotionally unstable...


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## Cacowgirl

That is a tough situation. Hope you can move Lestat sooner. How soon can the horses come home to be w/you?


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## Daisy25

Drafts--

Number one - you are doing the right thing by moving your horses...and I agree about meeting with the vet before moving Lestat.

Number two - you are not responsible for anything else that happens at this barn. Period.

Why is the trainer behaving badly? Who knows? but - My guess would be that she is in a panic because the loss of your boarding income means the loss of her lifestyle. I mean, really...who the heck is going to come in as your replacement? Who is going to look at a barn in that condition and say "Sign me up!" ???

So that being the case...they are probably on the road to "out of business". 

This is NOT your fault and you DO have to make decisions based upon the best interest of your horses...regardless of how it may be impacting the barn at this time.

Is the trainer taking it out on you? Sounds like it. 

Would she really take it out on your horses?...Hopefully not - although she may be telling them bad things about you during the morning feeding (Your owner is such a b*tch! I don't see why she is making you move...)

Move as soon as you can...and in the meanwhile, try not to engage the trainer if you can avoid it. You don't owe her any explanations - nor do you owe the barn owner any extra chores or "favors". Be civil....and leave it at that.

Good luck!


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## CLaPorte432

How far away is the barn that you are moving to? Is there anyway to hand walk Lestat there instead of hauling him? Or pony him?

I for sure would be moving my horses as well. I understand that things happen, but the fact that they can't clean up the place or have the insurance on the facility, therefore they'll have no money to rebuild because they are already in debt. It's just not worth the money.

On top of that, you have a trainer that is disrespectful to not only you, but her own father as well? you don't want to deal with people like that. If she can't follow simple instructions for the health of your horses, she doesn't belong around them.

I couldn't think twice about leaving. And I'd be doing my best to get ALL of my horses out of there.

Poor Lestat.


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## drafts4ever

Vet is coming out at three today. My truck isn't in my procession at the moment, long story short it's my graduation present this year from massage school so my parents and I haven't looked yet. My friend is hauling for me but the earliest she's available is Tuesday. When the fencing on my property is done I hopefully can move my horses in may. There's some small repairs that need to be fixed in the house before I live there so when the weather shapes up a bit we can start on that.
Back to the truck. Now because of this situation my dad and I are truck shopping. I have shows I need to go to and because I won't be able to use my trainers dads truck anymore it's time for me to find my own. So shopping has begun. 
I'm hoping Lestat can move sooner than later. I'm so nervous about my horses it's giving me matched flu symptoms. Achey and can't keep things down. After the vet leaves today I'm going to go back home and sleep. I feel so crappy right now.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## mudpie

Oh wow! What a knurly situation! hugs


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## drafts4ever

He said no hauling for a week and then he will be good to go. He said he's still going to need a month more of stall rest and hand walking but he's coming along. He doesn't want to sedate him for such a short haul but if I need him there when we arrive to schedule before hand with him. 
Turns out my tummy isnt just nerves, I have the tummy bug that's going around so I'm keeping my fingers crossed I can still move my girls tomorrow.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Mellow Mel

Good luck tomorrow and feel better! Glad he can be moved in a week and not a month. In the meantime you will just go there daily and check on him and before you know it he will be out of there.


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## drafts4ever

We are moving the girls today after my friend gets off work. I'm heading over there in a bit to start packing their stuff up.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## drafts4ever

So my girls are moved into the barn up the street. I knew they were stressed but didn't realize how stressed until Caleigh trotted into the new place and almost ran me over getting out of the old barn. Both girls were bug eyed and snorting. Apparently last night Caleigh had a piece of sheet metal land behind her stall. Just wonderful. I'm happy they're out of there and now have a nice comfy and quiet place to settle down in. Poor girls have gone through so much the past couple days! 
Lestat gets moved on the 5th of February.


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## loveduffy

do what is right for you and your horse before it is to late


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## tinyliny

Probably no cookies left at this point, but all I can say is that I am glad I am not in your shoes right now. Wow, what a lot you have on your plate! Guess that's why there's no more room for cookies.


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## drafts4ever

Vet says Lestat will not be ok to move until the 5th at the earliest so I can't do anything about that. Even for a short haul it's not safe to even push it on him right now the vet says so sadly in the best interest of the horse he has to stay there for another week. He's getting moved on the 5th though early and latest. I would have moved him if I could but get said no.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## mom2pride

Keep hangin in there...it will be over sooner than you think.


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## drafts4ever

I was in the ER most of Tuesday so I couldn't get my girls moved. Apparently that night a piece of sheet metal flew by their side taken up by the wind so I moved them yesterday. I keep finding out more and more stuff! Such as the barn was dropped by their insurance company years ago because they didn't have the money to do the preventative maintenance to avoid something like this! If I had known that before moving my horses there I wouldn't have been a boarder in the first place!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## drafts4ever

Lestat is settled into his new home. He worked himself into a sweat hauling but we took all the dividers out and dosed him with 1000lbs of calm and cool. He loaded three times and then we finally locked up and headed out. We did it when my trainer was away at a lesson so she wouldn't force him. I had three of my "family" assist me all knowledgable with babies and we took our time. When we got him in we shut the doors and he played in the shavings, she led out the windows, paced, pawed a little and then we headed off really slow. I drove with my hazards on the whole way and everything went fine. We ended up moving him to a barn about 30 minutes away so he can be with my friends two draft geldings that are great babysitters. I'm movin my girls over there sometime this week.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## CLaPorte432

Congrats! I know that you were super stressed about the move. Glad it went well!


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## mom2pride

Glad atleast part of this is behind you


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## drafts4ever

Luckily I got my girls moved two weeks ago to a friends place and I'm hauling them over to this facility on Tuesday. At least that's my aim. Just easier to have every horse in the same place. For shows im trading jousting training for my friends shire for her event training for legacy and the rest of my jousting group has over 100 years in horse training so I'm very sure we could figure out Pinto!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Cacowgirl

Glad to hear it went well, keep us posted


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## drafts4ever

Lestat got his first round pen run around today. He was a good boy! Bath time too! Clean happy baby! I have my own trailer but not my own truck so finding a truck available to haul with tomorrow is becoming an issue. I wrote my friend and told her she might have my girls for a little longer until I can figure out how to get a truck to my trailer to haul over and get my girls. She said no problem and they are enjoying their pony vacation in the sun!


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## stevenson

I would move my horses. If the one with the hurt shoulder can be tranquilized then have the Vet out, tranq him and move him. Your Trainer was irritated because she was losing out some decent money, and in frustration slammed things. Maybe she is extremely stressed. Maybe she is immature. I do have a question.. what is a pinto trainer? is it because your horse is a pinto? which is just a color . A decent trainer should be able to handle a stud colt. ANd why is he not gelded ? If he has bad shoulders you should not breed him .


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## drafts4ever

Please please please read the entire thread before responding to posts. I don't mean to come off snappy but recently this seems to be an issue with many threads going on here. 

If you had read the entire thread you would have realized all your questions have been answered or at least I believe they have, I'm not going to track back over to check. 

1. Horses were moved at the end of January/beginning of February with no problems and no tranques. 

2. My former trainer "specialized" in showing the Pinto shows. I dropped her as my trainer as soon as I found how she was handling Lestat and made arrangements to move as well as a number of other things such as not working my mare when I had paid for full training. It explains a lot now that I look back. I have since coupled with a trainer in northern Washington State who is going to mentor me for breed shows for my Drum mare and my Friesian Colt. As for a proper colt trainer for him, a very close friend of mine has 30 years of colt starting, manners training, and over all breeding work which I had no clue about until I saw her resume. She has offered to work with him and train me along the way so I snatched that up right as it fell out of her mouth! 

3. Lestat DOES NOT and I repeat DOES NOT have bad shoulders. He fell in the trailer, did the splits in the front end and severely strained and pulled his chest and right shoulder. His most recently lameness exam cleared him as fully recovered. For more information please read :http://www.horseforum.com/horse-health/traumatic-entry-into-new-home-109001/

4. He is not gelded and will not be gelded because he is of extremely well bred Friesian lines (I posted when I got him and listed his lineage but I'm not going to look it up on here right now) and he is one of the last colts on his fathers side. Although his main job is being a show horse in dressage and theatrical riding, eventually he will be offered to the Friesian breeds only after he has made Studbook and a name of himself in order to pass on Nannings lines. That won't be for quite a long time. 

To sum things up. All the horses are moved, healthy, fine, and started show season as of Sunday of last week.


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## drafts4ever

So long story short I will be happy when I finally have my horses at my place. Boarding holds too much drama. Very long story short, the new place I moved to and have been at since February is apparently full of backstabbing drama ladies who don't have anything better to do than ride and then bully the younger peoples. 
Today I was interrupted while I was riding and got screamed at for being a "young, ignorant snot" and if she so felt she'd run right over my dogs with her horse.
WHAT?! 
She didn't bother to mention why she was yelling at me, for what and just what?!
Come to find out she's been talking vey nastily about me because of my horse breeds and I must be a spoiled child because there's no way I could afford them. EXCUSE ME?! I worked my little butt off for those animals! And her reason for hating my dogs? They don't belong at barns. HOWEVER this barn has a leash rule which I respect and have cleared with the owners. So for months this lady has been brewing and I guess I was just lucky being around people constantly so she didn't have the chance until today. I was in the arena riding, my friend is sitting outside the arena with my dogs passed out at his feet and she comes at me full force when I dismount , backs me into a corner and tears my head off. And I'm not exaggerating when I say tears, verbally of course. Her friend came over specifically to say none of that is needed. Her other friend came over just to nod to everything she said and repeat bad attitude bad attitude whenever she had the chance.
I'm then get called names and blamed for being defensive. Well I'm being screamed at? Should I roll over and play dead instead? (I figured out quickly that would let me out of the arena)
So I admitted fault for anything that bugged her and she let me leave. I have never been in that situation before but seeing that she's there every day I've decided to change my time riding to when she's not there...morning. 
On the note of her threatening to run over my dogs I got nasty but didn't scream. I stated loudly and clearly that she had just posed a threat to me that I take seriously. Threats are an offense and "if you dare touch me or any of my animals in any violent manner I will sue you to the fullest extent of the law. As soon as you harm my pets that is animal abuse which is illegal. You threatened what is the equivalent of family to me. To me you just told me you will run over my kids. So again, if you attempt to harm ANY of my animals I will sue you until there is nothing left. Do you understand me." 
She told me "you're 23 what can you do" I said "a lot."
I have a family full of lawyers spread all over that cover almost everything and a few mainly specializing in ethical and criminal. 
I was also told by one of my cousins today that it would be a long shot but I could push for verbal abuse. I have no intentions of doing any of this but I shouldn't even feel the need to.
My plan so far is to keep to myself like usual, switch to riding in the mornings when it's just me and Lestats trainer( another mother figure to me), keep my dogs at home and wait out the next month as best I can so I can calmly put in my 30days for board and move my horses to my house. 
This completely blew me out of the water and I just needed to get it off my chest. I'm still confused, frustrated, slightly annoyed, ****ed because of the threat. 
I want to say before I hit post, my dogs are always with me whatever I'm doing if I bring them out. If I can't have them with me for whatever reason they are left home or put in one of my stalls. The owners have ok'd this. 
I just want out. 
Thank you for reading. I'm not looking for a pity party I'm just tired.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## thesilverspear

Sorry to hear that. You have the worst luck with barns! Is there a barn owner you could speak to or another friend you could get on your side, to at least have another pair of eyes on your critters?


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## JanetsPaintedRayne

Some people are just ridiculous.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Cacowgirl

Welll that just really sucks! Sorry you had that awful confrontation, but now you know who to look out for. Hope you can manage to avoid her in the future.`It will be so much better to have your horses at home-hope that happens soon for you.


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## Spirit Lifter

I guess I'm lucky. Nice BO, nice ladies to ride with, nice horses. Get your horses on your own property and don't look back. That lady is a jealous bully.


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## Spirit Lifter

And next time that lady decides to open her trap I would kindly say "You know....moving horses to a new barn is never easy. It's an adjustment for all concerned. Thanks for helping my transition go as smooth as possible. You made me feel really welcome. Takes a special kind of person to be like that." And walk away. She'll get your point.:lol:


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## mls

Have you talked to the BO? S/he needs to know. It's likely you are not the first person this has happened to.

I found out after I lost several boarders they had left due to person at our barn like that. Had I known, I could of at least talked to the other person or had her leave and kept the good ones. Of course now the evil boarder is gone but the damage was done.


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## drafts4ever

I do seem to have the worst luck! To be fair the first barn was great until I got settled in and became one of the "family" then I opened my eyes and saw things that bothered me. 
This is place is unlike any facility I've ever leased at or even ridden at and only the second one I've boarded at. At first sounded great but to begin the barn owners are backwards. The husband has opened up and is friendly ish but you still feel a draft when he opens his mouth. Fake nice? The wife is under the impression that because horses are on a property she owns she can do whatever she wants and when confronted gets a deer in the headlights look. So far I've heard and seen nothing happen to my horses but she's so difficult to speak to. She's either way too excited about something where you get blown away by too much happy (creepy happy) or really ****ed for whatever reason? I'd talk to her but I don't think it would get anywhere. 
I considered calling the husband about it and I know he'd speak to the lady which any other reason would be fine but I wouldn't trust her to blame the worlds problems on me and find some way to get me and my horses booted. I've already been told/questioned by him about my care because I'm 23 so of course that means I don't have experience. So I wouldn't put it past him to take sides if it ever came to it? It's just a bad situation all around. 

My parents are turning over 7.5 acres with a barn and a house to me as soon as I get my state license for equine massage. I'm certified already and sent in the papers to sign up for the license test so now I'm waiting to hear back. As soon as I get the first test done I can move. That's the deal I've made. I've stressed to them I need to have a way out if I absolutely can't stay there and they moved from being licensed and starting a practice to just get scheduled and take the first of the five tests. So that lifts a bit of weight off my shoulders. 
As for eyes I have a few but one is gone until the 18th. I have close horse family friends that live within 5 minutes of the facility and they'd have no problem watching out if I asked. 

I just want to get out of there.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Ne0n Zero

Wow, sounds like you've had a rough couple of months. (Or maybe more than a couple O_O) 

I'm glad you're out of the old barn, and equally as glad to hear that you will soon be out of the new place with your babies at home as well.

Good luck!


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## Saddlebag

It makes me wonder how much that person is bullied/abused at home? It seems to get passed on and it's unfortunate you have been the recipient.


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## drafts4ever

Well she's 45 if that says anything and she's bragged about how she didn't have parents when she was growing up so she raised herself. From what I've heard her say she was pretty much a proud rebel. No idea. 
She's back to being her nice fake self but I've been doing my best to ignore her. I moved to mornings and still see her so I just speak when spoken to and whenever she starts to talk I take out my phone and say "just for my own sake, you're being recorded" and she either walks away or compliments me about something. So far it's been hello goodbye. Today I pulled up with my goats in the truck and she wanted to see them. I told her I was busy and was just stopping by to hook up my trailer and grab a horse so I could teach a class.


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