# Do most people start out as confident riders?



## Skyseternalangel (Jul 23, 2011)

I have very huge confidence issues. I can barely sit on a horse bareback without freaking out. Cantering is even scarier.

But there are moments when both of those things are okay. I never do something that I don't feel comfortable doing. I highly respect my trainer though, she doesn't yell at me to do stuff. She let's ME cowgirl up and face the music. 

My confidence gets better but I'm not a sure as peanut butter rider, especially the more I learn and the more I find I have to tweak. 

It has a lot to do with self esteem more than just confidence though.

Falls can be scary, but after you fall it isn't so bad. I actually jump right up and make sure my horse is alright. He gets quite upset when people fall off of him. 

But as you get older, you get wiser. You realize "wow if I fell, I could break my hip or neck or something!" as you aren't as vivacious as you were as a teenager (your body isn't, mind is a different thing lol!)

Hoped that gave you some insight


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## iridehorses (Oct 22, 2007)

I've owned horses for over 30 years and have been riding for 30 years before that. I've had more falls then I care to count and a few were real bad wrecks. I had a very serious wreck a few years ago that shook my confidence to the core. It took a lot of effort to eventually get back to riding but I'm a lot more cautious then I ever used to be.

Don't be concerned about a fall. It will happen if you push the envelope or your horse has a bad day. You can't worry about it or it will effect your riding.


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## antonella (Feb 29, 2012)

*confidence?*

agree with the other post. when i was very young i broke my back falling on a fence, then i was back up in a few years. with a little time to adjust. then i broke my wrist with a friend's horse, but i kept on riding mine with the cast. now, after a few years without riding (my horse died and it was a great sorrow) i've started again. but of course i'm more cautious and weary.sometime i don't feel so sure of myself (horses read that perfectly) and this makes me more nervous. it is ok as long as you are relaxed and at ease. 
it has nothing or little to do with abilities. accidents happen to even the bravest riders. only when you get oldrr you get less reckless and a bit more worried.
but enjoy your rides, you will be fine as long as you do.


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## pinkjumperboots (Apr 13, 2012)

I went into horses, as confident as i thought i could take on the worl! but then i fell and went comletely numb and have been knocked out and kicked and thrown by buckers so i lost mmy confidence some but i got right back on when i could with the same attitude, and that has taken e to ppg nationls, national show jumping and c in pc.


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## COWCHICK77 (Jun 21, 2010)

Like your grandma said, I was confident until a good hard fall. Then it becomes real.

I have had some nasty wrecks that have left me scarred physically on my face but didn't bother me.

But the worst chilled me bad mentally, no marks were left on the body. I had a young horse buck, I went to pull his head up and pulled him up and over the top of me. (my fault) I rode two more horses after that, but was crippled for a week afterwards and couldn't get up from my living room floor. Not going to lie....pretty chilled after that one.

You never know which wreck is going to hit you the worst. Every horseman struggles with it to some degree and at some point in their lifetime.


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## Iseul (Mar 8, 2010)

I've had 4 falls (one bail) in the 7 years I've been riding. I've always been a confident rider and I frequently push the envelope. The only thing any of those falls has compromised was my "ego" (I'm tired and I can't think of the word I wanted to use) when I fell at a show. But even so, even that wasn't bad at all, because I wasn't the only one to come off, much less the worst of the falls that occured there.

It might sound odd, but the only time I've ever lost any confidence is the times I was forced to wear a helmet. Before I realised that the helmet was my fault (most people that have seen me ride and know me in person will agree that it was, in fact, the helmet), I wore one. I won't try to lie about it or sweep it under the rug, I was a terrible rider when I was wearing one (and still am if I have to put one on). I was too preoccupied on the helmetto pay attention to my cues, finesse, tactic, etc; I yanked, I kicked, I hauled on the reins when I needed to stop, and paid no attention to my seat. 
I tend to be a person who is very confident in their own abilities and are willing to risk some to add to those abilities. Even though I might be really sore and need a leg up to get back on, I've never been scared or worried to get back up. I've fallen off both with a saddle and bareback, the saddle probably being my worst fall. When I get into a situation (and I was always yelled at for it) I kick my feet out of the stirrups and do what I need to do to remedy that situation. If I exhaust all options, I just cling (or bail if the situation is appropriate, such as my one bail when I fell back behind the saddle and lost stirrups/reins). I've never fallen off since I started doing that, and I'm hoping it holds true for a good while. I can sit out a tantrum (kick, buck, rear) very well for what it's worth, and I use that to my advantage.

I'm sure at some point I'll have a fall that will shake my confidence a bit, but I doubt that my passion for riding/training will ever let me decide to stop riding.
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## pinkjumperboots (Apr 13, 2012)

Iseul said:


> I've had 4 falls (one bail) in the 7 years I've been riding. I've always been a confident rider and I frequently push the envelope. The only thing any of those falls has compromised was my "ego" (I'm tired and I can't think of the word I wanted to use) when I fell at a show. But even so, even that wasn't bad at all, because I wasn't the only one to come off, much less the worst of the falls that occured there.
> 
> It might sound odd, but the only time I've ever lost any confidence is the times I was forced to wear a helmet. Before I realised that the helmet was my fault (most people that have seen me ride and know me in person will agree that it was, in fact, the helmet), I wore one. I won't try to lie about it or sweep it under the rug, I was a terrible rider when I was wearing one (and still am if I have to put one on). I was too preoccupied on the helmetto pay attention to my cues, finesse, tactic, etc; I yanked, I kicked, I hauled on the reins when I needed to stop, and paid no attention to my seat.
> I tend to be a person who is very confident in their own abilities and are willing to risk some to add to those abilities. Even though I might be really sore and need a leg up to get back on, I've never been scared or worried to get back up. I've fallen off both with a saddle and bareback, the saddle probably being my worst fall. When I get into a situation (and I was always yelled at for it) I kick my feet out of the stirrups and do what I need to do to remedy that situation. If I exhaust all options, I just cling (or bail if the situation is appropriate, such as my one bail when I fell back behind the saddle and lost stirrups/reins). I've never fallen off since I started doing that, and I'm hoping it holds true for a good while. I can sit out a tantrum (kick, buck, rear) very well for what it's worth, and I use that to my advantage.
> ...


My passion for horses no matter how hard I fall, or get injured will never be gone! I live it!
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## Tonipony (Oct 4, 2009)

When I was young, I rode anything and everything that I could get on. I rode the rankest ponies around as I was little and could stick on them. I have not been bucked off or come off one in over 20 years and have had some rides that I couldn't believe I stayed on. About 10 years ago, I was riding for other people and riding a lot of younger ones and my confidence was still there. Now, I find that my confidence is lacking and do not feel I am riding to my ability. I still ride bareback often and feel that my seat is not what it used to be. Maybe it is age and the fact that I had been injured riding and realize what can happen. I also just purchased my very first helmet although I have been riding over 40 years.


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## Kayty (Sep 8, 2009)

I do think ones confidence can wane a little as they get older. I think back to some of the things I did as a kid on horses, and would never do them now despite being a far more competant rider. As you get older, get more responsibilities including a family, I think those weigh on your shoulders a bit more. If I had a bad fall or accident now, I would be extremely stuck for money if not able to work, I'd probably have to sell one or two or my horses etc. 

Falls can knock your confidence. I find that if I take a fall, and the fall was something I know was my fault, that I probably could have stuck etc. then it doesn't knock my confidence and I feel more determined to get back on and fix it. 
But a fall off a horse that genuinely wants to get you off can really shake you. It took me a long time to get back on after a nasty fall a few years ago, a young horse that geuinely wanted me off her back, bucked like a bronc and when that didn't get me off, she flipped and slammed herself into a gate and crushed me there, then got up and I was dragged at full gallop across the arena until my stirrup broke. 

Just be aware in riding, that you are not invincible, accidents happen. We're riding 500+kg flight animals with a mind of their own. It would be extremely ignorant to think you will never have a fall


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## tbrantley (Mar 6, 2011)

I have hit the ground more times than I care to admit. When I was younger, I took risk that I look back and think to myself it is a wonder I am still alive. But at that time I had all the confidence in the world. Now, I am older and have had more broken bones than I can count. 

I am very confident on my regular horses, but when I get a new horse or have to ride a different horse my confidence is a little shacken for the first few miles of the ride. I worry about breaking something that may take longer to heal. Also, I am not as strong as I use to be due to several injuries. 

So, I think your grandmother may be referring to the fact the older you get the more cautious you become which may effect your confidence. I know it has mine. Yet, I continue to ride and take risk. I focus on letting the horse know that he has a leader and not so much what could happen, until after the ride.


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## franknbeans (Jun 7, 2007)

I think that as we age falling affects us differently-not only do we not heal as fast, it hurts more, all of that, but we realize that we have a job, family and responsibilities. THere are folks that count on us. Falling affects more than just US.


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## SRich (Sep 13, 2011)

Thanks for the insight everyone! Just to clarify, I'm well aware that I will eventually fall, I just hope it doesn't happen any time soon! Haha
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## Light (Mar 4, 2012)

The very first time I rode a horse I was 7yrs old and I fell. I got back on. From 7 yrs to 17 I lost count of how many times I fell or was tossed. It was over 45. I never really got hurt and was always able to ride the next time I was scheduled to. I never missed school or missed out on anything because of it and I never broke anything except for my hands. It didn't shake my confidence other than maybe once or twice but only for a week or so. It really didn't hurt back then. I didn't ride for many years and started again at 45yrs of age. I got tossed while mounting a horse recently and I missed a week of work and it hurt allot. It hurt for about a month. I was constantly reminded of it through the pain. So, yeah my confidence is not what it was. I am not afraid, I just don't want to get hurt. LOL


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## happy123 (Jan 4, 2012)

I was the same way. You are going to think we are all crazy until you have a fall. And you will fall, unless you stop riding tomorrow.


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## Paint pony (Mar 27, 2012)

I was a very nervous rider as child. After a fall I felt more confident and got right back on. For me it was the anticipation of what could happen, that made me nervous. Now that I am older, I am careful about what horse I get on. I don't feel I have to prove myself as much as i used to. I don't ride horses that have serious issues, I'm not Monty Roberts. I want to enjoy my time on a horse and learn as much as I can.


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## Hidalgo13 (Dec 24, 2010)

When i first started riding i had more confidence, but that's because I was much younger and so eager to learn I didn't even think about falling. Now that I'm older and "wiser" (as in I know more horror stories), when i feel my balance is iffy (as in when i dont' ride often enough) I start thinking of all those accidents gone bad. I guess the fact i have never fallen and haven't experienced this "not so bad thing" makes me think the worse. I am usually able to keep my imagination under control and I just stop myself from looking down and concentrate on staying on and riding. 

I think it really depends on the person and their experiences whether they loose confidence. When you hit puberty and are a developing into a young woman, your emotions and confidence can also become meddled a bit before it becomes stable again.


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## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

I am more confident in my riding in that I feel better able to deal with this or that that a horse can dish out. Less confident in dealing with the unexpected, because I KNOW it DOES happen. As you get older, you expect the unexpected.


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## Sharpie (May 24, 2009)

When I first started riding, I was too busy thinking about riding while I was doing it to think or worry about falling. I have come off a fair few times, though luckily have never been seriously injured in the process. 

Now, just riding along doesn't take up 110% of my attention all the time like it used to. There will be times while I'm riding that I have a few brain cells to spare, and sometimes they comment on things like how bad it would hurt if my pony decided to stop dead and toss me into a gate or for me to come off while galloping. It's not fear for me or really a lack of confidence, not exactly, but I am more cautious than I was five years ago. It just feels like more of an awareness of just how much a serious injury would suck and how much I would like to avoid it.


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## arrowsaway (Aug 31, 2011)

I actually started a thread similar to this not long ago. I used to be absolutely fearless on horses, until I was thrown and broke my ankle. Now... I have some real trust issues with the horse I currently have, even though he's not the one who threw me. I'm torn between my love of riding and the difficulty of putting your trust into a 1200lb animal with a mind of its own. 

It's not an exaggeration to say we put our lives in the hands [hooves ] of our horses every single time we get on. To me, that is a HUGE gesture of faith and trust. Since my fall, I have not been able to achieve that. I hope one day I will...


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## ohmyitschelle (Aug 23, 2008)

I am a nervous rider. I took a LONG time to return back to riding after shattering my leg. It's ironic because I think I was more of a nervous rider BEFORE my injury. Like Kayty mentioned, as a kid I'd jump anything and do things I'd never do today!! I feel my confidence has risen with the knowledge and progress of riding my mare Honey... I ride better now, so I feel like I'm more capable at handling situations than say six months ago. But still I do things like ride in enclosed areas, and have never ridden on the road with Honey or anything... these are things I'm working on - just road out in the main field the other week for the very first time on Honey very successfully - but I can only work to my limits.


As someone who has helped teach people to ride, I actually prefer riders who start out being a little wary. Some riders who hop up and feel too confident in the saddle immediately actually worry me. I think to ride we all need to have a realistic approach. This is an animal who at any time could do something and you could fall and hurt yourself. I think that's why I'm enjoying my best friend getting into riding. She isn't overtly confident, she asks lots of questions, and tries hard to improve. With this mindset she is becoming educated and just today rode my mare all on her own and handled her very well. My horse respected her. I previously had another rider who was rather natural looking up in the saddle and took that compliment to her head. Once she believed she was ready for riding by herself, my mare had an issue with her and would refuse to listen and wouldn't stop walking - just headed back to her tie up area and proclaimed she was "done"... some people may say is my training issue (stops on a dime for people she respects) but I do feel overtly confident beginners start to feel like they're so good at the basics that they can handle more than they actually can. 

It's good to be confident, but realistic at the same time - no I'm not meaning don't do things cos they might have a consequence - if that was the case, none of us would be riding!! 

Not saying in the slightest that OP is one of these kind of riders - you seem very educated and realistic


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## boldstart (Oct 11, 2009)

I used to be such a nervous rider. I rode dressage for years and I just couldnt ride hot horses. I would get so tense through the shoulders and hands and everytime the horse did something I didnt want it to do I would panic.

And then I started learning trackriding - oh boy! The first eight weeks were a mess. Got taken off, thrown off under rails, bucked off, kicked and many more things. Until it clicked one day what I gotta do lol. Every since then, well my confidence is sky high - but Im still aware of my skills and what I cannot or can ride when im at my job.

Everyone falls and everybody will lose confidence time to time. My last fall was very lucky. I fell underneath the horse and he clipped my neck and with his other foot almost stood on my head. I was a bit shaken, but I got back on and finished the horses work and it made me feel a bit better. Just the next few times I rode that horse longer until I trusted myself again with how I was riding him before.


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## cowboy bowhunter (Mar 15, 2012)

It all depends on the person. If you can manage being layed up for a few weeks and that not bothering you and pain isnt a issie you should be fine. I started out confident with horsers. Have been bucked off many many times and have never lost my confidence.


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## Saskia (Aug 26, 2009)

I started off pretty confident, and was for years. I started riding when I was about 8, and until I was about 16 I would ride anything, pretty much jump anything. I'd fallen off many times when learning to ride, mostly because I was a bit of an idiot and had a not so novice friendly horse, but none of it bothered me. 

Then I had a more serious fall, and then six months later another of a horse I completed trusted. I kept riding but I wasn't so brave. I got out of horses, riding only occasionally for a few years, until I was going to start riding a friends horse. I had bad, unexpected fall from this horse and broke my arm and cracked my spine.

I said I'd never ride again, that they were too dangerous. I know that I was lucky and it could have been so much worse, and that is what freaks me out. A few months ago I decided I loved riding, and I couldn't let fear rule my life forever, and I could see it spreading. It starts with stopping riding, and then something else, and something else and all of a sudden you're a slave to fear.

So I ride now, and I am nervous before I ride, but I still do. I just bought a horse actually. 

I think the thing is when you start riding you ride safe horses, and nothing bad happens. You feel safe and confident and that is half the point of lessons. The more you ride the more dangerous horses you ride, and the more you see what can happen, and how little control you have. Then for some people, they have a bad fall or something, and they realise their own fragility and mortality. It can be the 100th fall or the first, it just pushes you over the edge. Some are okay with it, some become afraid and some stop riding altogether.


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## poppy1356 (Jan 18, 2012)

I don't think it is so much confidence as it is just how you look at the situation. I have only come across one horse I was a bit nervous about getting on, large Arab, green broke and blind in one eye. Never came off that horse in short time I rode her though. 

To me it seems that most people look at the situation as they fell so now they must be scared or it could have been worse. I look at it as a learning experience. I have never fallen off the same way twice. You think about why you fell and get prepared for that next time. My instructor always said you aren't a good rider until you have fallen off. And you always get right back on unless of course you broke something. 

I wouldn't say I'm a really confident rider, I know anything can happen, but I'm not scared to get on a horse either. I have had one bad accident where my horse reared up at show and went right on over on me. No one had ever seen him rear even in the pasture so of course he was not going to be balanced especially with a rider. As soon as my knee healed up I was right back on. 

If you look at the situation with the thought something could go wrong it will make you nervous which seems to actually make things go wrong. Everything is a learning experience, whether you are in the saddle or lying on the ground. Everything happens for a reason, figure that out and fix it.


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## SRich (Sep 13, 2011)

Wow, thanks everyone for all of the advice and stories! Like I said earlier, I wasn't afraid at all when I was on the horse, it was when my grandma got me thinking about what could've happened that made me think about why I'm so eager and confident to mount a horse. I also realize that my riding instructor wont let me on a horse that she doesn't think I can't handle, but every horse is dangerous and is capable of hurting us. My mom wont even come watch me ride, because she cringes if I go any faster than a walk or slow trot. LOL
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## MN Tigerstripes (Feb 20, 2009)

I've gone back and forth on the confidence several times in my riding career, when I was younger I had a horse that fell on me several times and that really shook me up for awhile. I still am very leary of tripping horses and unknown ground. I find it shakes my confidence much more when there's nothing I could do about it or when the horse is genuinely trying to get rid of me. "Normal" falls don't bother me so much.. 

Now my niece is 7 and she's not a very confident rider, but it's because she's afraid of the fall. The scariest part for her is getting off the horse, but I don't blame her, she's riding my 15'3 gelding... :lol: She is getting better though as she becomes more secure and to be honest a little bigger. I see her becoming a very confident rider as she ages, though I'm sure she'll have her moments of shaken confidence. It's part of riding..

ETA - I was going to say that there's a good thing about having your confidence shaken a bit because it teaches you to be a little more careful and realistic about what you are doing and asking your horse to do..


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## thesilverspear (Aug 20, 2009)

I was more confident after my first fall. The anticipation of what it might be like to fall off was far more stressful than actually falling off and being fine.


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## gigem88 (May 10, 2011)

As a teenager and young adult, falls (even bad ones) never shook my confidence. It wasn't until I matured around 40 did the thought of a fall shake my confidence. I recently hit a fence (lost my balance, horse took off, turned when he got to the fence, I didn't! Got an armfull of stitches and a bum knee) and although I know it was a freak accident, but I'm still a little concerned about getting back that particular horse. I think as one gets older one realizes what "could of happened" and that scares us because we have so many people counting on us to be their like older parents, kids, grandkids, etc.


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## SRich (Sep 13, 2011)

thesilverspear said:


> I was more confident after my first fall. The anticipation of what it might be like to fall off was far more stressful than actually falling off and being fine.


That's what I want to happen too. I mean I fell off once, but it was only because the saddle's girth became loose on a trail ride. I pretty much just rolled off. :lol: I've had a few close calls where I thought for sure I was gonna eat dirt, but I manage to hang on. :wink:


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## Wildrose (Mar 19, 2012)

> It starts with stopping riding, and then something else, and something else and all of a sudden you're a slave to fear.​




Saskia, I believe that this is what happened with me. I had horses as a teen, and had no fear of riding, and my confidence was high.

Then I got married, and sold my horses. I didn't get another horse for 15 years, at age 35. He was not the best trained horse and I was nervous on him but did ride. I fell off him and broke my shoulder blade. Another horse I had about that time ran off with me and I baled, hurting my knee pretty bad.

I sold those horses, and got Chief. He was a gem. Calm and broke! We had many great rides. He got old and arthritic, and blind. Then I got Rosie as an untrained 2 year old. I did all the ground work with her, and had someone else put the first few rides on her. But, I was afraid. 

I have been working on this lack of confidence, but it's not gotten any better, and I have have now had Rosie for 13 years. I worked with an instructor, but had an incident the summer before last, where Rosie went into a bouncy canter, and I was TERRIFIED! I baled and hurt my ankle. Since then, I have not had the courage to get back on. She just might become a total pasture pet.

So, the series of falls combined with being older is what did it for me. 
​


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## its lbs not miles (Sep 1, 2011)

SRich said:


> I was talking to my grandma earlier today and she told me that I wont always be as confident as I am with horses. When I asked her why she thinks that, she said that it's because I haven't had a fall. I kind of just shrugged it off, and told myself that she knows absolutely nothing about horses anyways. Then, I scanned through this forum and I noticed there were a lot of confidence related threads, which is leading me to think that maybe my grandma is right. Now I'm merely curious, how many of you (as horse riders) have suffered loss of confidence from a fall. Not necessary a serious fall, just a fall.
> 
> Even though I'm a beginner rider, I'm confident with my riding abilities. I trust my riding instructor and I know that she will not let me do anything that she doesn't think I'm capable of. I'm by all means not a great rider, I only hope to be one day. I was just thinking about 'what ifs'. For example, _what if_ I fell off on during my last riding lesson when I was cantering on the trails with a horse that has a fast canter. No doubt, I probably would've gotten physically hurt, but what about emotionally? I'd like to think that I would get back on the horse immediantly, but _what if _my confidence was shot down? One of the boarders at the barn is afraid of cantering on her horse I rode during my last riding lesson. I don't think that she has ever fallen, which makes me wonder where the fear came from?
> 
> It gives me something to think about that I never think about when I'm actually riding. Do most riders lack confidence from a fall or horse related injury or has the fear always been instilled into them? I don't ever want a knock down to my confidence, but I guess it would make you a stronger rider once you overcome it.


As you may have determined from the posts....there is no one answer. It depends on the person. I've been riding for 44 years (11-55) and I have never come off a horse, or sustained an injury and been concerned about riding afterwards. The last time I came off a horse was in Jan or Feb this year and as always, it had no effect on my desire to ride. I have an 83 year old first cousin (once removed) who started working with two new young horses in Jan and he still doesn't worry about it. I've had a cousin fall off 35 years ago and she's never gotten back on a horse. I know another who couldn't wait to get back into the saddle when they left the hospital.
It's an individual thing that only you will know when it happens....if it happens.


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## SamBadger (Aug 7, 2011)

Im not a very confident rider and sometimes dont trust my ability, today i was bucked off a horse i ride a lot (it wasnt her fault, the vet came out after,they think shes ill) anyway, the girl originally riding her in lesson was too scared to ride her after she bucked once so they asked me to ride her, i wasnt nervous at all but she was bucking a lot and then going into canter she did a big buck and i fell off. It wasnt a bad fall, im fine just a sore back and a few cuts and bruises but from this i have gained confidence not lost it, i feel better because i knew i could sit to the other bucks it was just one that unseated me. However i have lost confidence through another fall when cantering which left me with a mental block when learning to canter, so really i think it depends on you as a person. But now i'm over it i've gained confidence, sorry the ramble hahah


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## Cinder (Feb 20, 2011)

I think it depends on the person.

I was confident when I began riding and for the most part I have remained confident (or at least unafraid) during riding. The only time I would really say that my confidence suffered was after my most recent fall, and it wasn't that bad, plus I got over it quickly.


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## BrinkofSunshine (Jan 15, 2012)

I always hear people say kids are fearless when it comes to riding.. when I started riding at around 7/8, I was very nervous. There was a big sign next to the tack room that warned about possible death, and it terrified me. After two years I was only doing crossrails and some cantering (it's hard to remember how much I actually did.. but I remember being very scared of cantering). 

Now that I've picked it back up at age 21, I feel less nervous than I did as a kid (now I love to canter!), but I do have my confidence issues. On my second lesson the horse spooked and did what I think was a crow hop/small buck, and I fell. It took me over a month to want to get on that horse again!


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## Paint pony (Mar 27, 2012)

I need help with confidence. A friend took me on a trail ride, let me ride one of her horses and I new as soon as I sat on the horse it was not going to work. I did everything I could to stay calm but the horse could feel I was tense. She started bucking and being fresh. I stayed on no worries, but my confidence and pride are mush. I went for a ride today on a different horse, all ok. I think it's going to take me some time to trust my skills. I could have handled that horse, but I gave in to my anxiety. I have been asked to go on another trail ride, and I really want to go...what do I do?


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