# What can I Do? Mare with Bad Attitude. Please Respond



## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

you can't wait several months. is there no neighbor in the area who could help you with this mare? you don't necessarily need a full on trainer, just at least someone who knows more about how to teach a horse to have better manner, AND, how to teach YOU to keep her that way.


She has figured out that you do not have the authority that her former owner must have had, that's why she was 'good' for a bit, then not.

it's very difficult to explain how to change up a relationship like this when it's evident that it's gone sour on all fronts, due to a basic attitude change. But, basically, you will have to become MUCH firmer with her. if you have fear of her, this will be hard. I doubt that she is seriously dangerous, yet. and a person who has a no nonsense, firm attitude, and perhaps a snappy whip to enforce the rules, could change her back into the sweet mare you bought.

someone working with you would be so much better.


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## cbar (Nov 27, 2015)

First off, you mentioned she is alone? Horses are herd animals and feel most comfortable when they have a friend - whether it's another horse, a donkey or even a goat or something.

Whenever there is a behavior change, first you need to rule out sickness or pain. Has she been seen by a vet to rule out any pain issues? Does your saddle and tack fit her properly? How often are you riding her? Are you working her every time you catch her? What is she getting fed?

First & foremost I would address any issues that would relate to pain or making her feel uncomfortable before attributing it to a bad attitude.


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## bsms (Dec 31, 2010)

You might consider some Clinton Anderson videos.


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## PoptartShop (Jul 25, 2010)

cbar said:


> First off, you mentioned she is alone? Horses are herd animals and feel most comfortable when they have a friend - whether it's another horse, a donkey or even a goat or something.
> 
> Whenever there is a behavior change, first you need to rule out sickness or pain. Has she been seen by a vet to rule out any pain issues? Does your saddle and tack fit her properly? How often are you riding her? Are you working her every time you catch her? What is she getting fed?
> 
> First & foremost I would address any issues that would relate to pain or making her feel uncomfortable before attributing it to a bad attitude.


I second this. :smile:
Yes. Make sure she is not in any pain or sickness. Are there any other trainers you can get out there before a few months go by? I agree too- horses are herd animals...she may not like that she is alone all day. Do not give up on her just yet. Give it some time.


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## QtrBel (May 31, 2012)

I agree with both of the above but will add this - having a buddy will not change the way she acts toward you. Once you know for sure it is not pain related to injury, illness or tack fit then working with her on the ground and establishing who is in charge is your next step. There are many good videos that can get you started. Once she has accepted you are the leader then get back up on her and expect the same. As she does not have a buddy then you be her buddy and make her want to be with you but with you as the alpha. Her actions to me say she is not being corrected for infractions and that you are perhaps missing the opportunity to establish yourself as the boss by not reading what is actually happening as it happens.


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## ducky1234 (May 2, 2017)

I've seen nice horses turn mean when they have to live alone. I've seen aggressive horses kept alone mellow out once they have company. You can get a suitable companion animal for less than $100. That's less expensive than all the vet testing advice.

That said, the horse is treating you like he would any other horse. Go to youtube and search "training aggressive horses" and you will find a wealth of videos to help. You need to get control pronto before someone gets hurt.


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## Light (Mar 4, 2012)

Hi, 

I don't think this is something you should try to address on your own. 

Yes, your horse needs a friend, be it horse, goat, mini. Maybe you know someone that has a horse who could share the living space (provided it is big enough) with your horse. 

You need to be sure there isn't a pain issue and that all your tack fits etc. You don't have the experience to do this, so you will need a seasoned horse trainer to help you evaluate your horse. 

You should have had the Vet check her when you bought her. Did one? If not, try to get her checked now to rule out a pain issue. 

There must be more than one trainer in your area. If money is a problem, you could try just going and talking to a local trainer and offering perhaps work in exchange for help with your horse? 

I have found most good horse trainers are usually desperate in need of stall mucking etc. I have also found the majority of them to want to promote horses in a positive way. I strongly doubt you wouldn't be able to work something out with one of them. Just get out there and start asking around. 

So, there is a place to start.


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## DanisMom (Jan 26, 2014)

You might want to check out Carson James horse training. It is formatted to start from the beginning with a horse and eliminate 'holes' in their training. There are videos that you can watch in order that teach you how to handle a horse correctly. It's $20/month to subscribe but you have access to all the videos and the facebook page where you can ask for help and advice. Of course, it would be much better to have an actual trainer to help you if that is possible.


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## horselovinguy (Oct 1, 2013)

I did not yet read all the responses...

_First off welcome to horse ownership and the learning curve that all new owners go through...

_ So...the first few weeks were sweet...
Now, the horns of nasty are starting to show...
So, the horse is being disrespectful, period.
She has tested you, tried you and your responses to her disrespect and each day pushed her bad attitude and disrespect a little further.
She has figured out you are a pushover and she can get away with near anything she wants by having and giving you a bad attitude...
She frightens you and your family who are all inexperienced, newbies it sounds...
*You need help*... you need some guidance from someone who is experienced with horses in a backyard setting.
Seriously, you need a trainer, a instructor, a valued friend who has really nice behaved horses of their own in their backyard as that is a clue this person knows how to gain and keep the respect of the horse...
Right now...your horse has "0" respect for you and is showing it in her actions, attitude.
If you don't stop it now it only gets worse quickly.
Get some help as you do _not_ have the knowledge to now turn this around yourself, sorry you just don't.
You need to regain the upper hand, that means this mare gives you your earned respect and puts her attitude and her bad behavior away.
Left with no reprisal of discipline this mare can become dangerous, then you will need to sell her...
But you know what...unless you learn how to get and keep this mare or any horses respect it is going to happen over and over and over again....
*Respect from a animal is not given but earned*...earned every single day by how you interact, handle, ride and do anything and everything with this animal.
Every time you touch, you see, you handle this horse you are teaching her new habits...in this case the habits are ones of disrespect shown to and at you..._it is time to change that!! NOW!!
You need some help to help you learn how to bring back the horse you now own, the one you brought home, the one you fell in love with enough that your parents got you your dream....a horse of my own!
:runninghorse2:....
jmo...
_


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## Acadianartist (Apr 21, 2015)

You do need to establish respect. I would do this with a lot of ground work. Be prepared with a nail in the palm of your hand if you think she may bite. Just let the sharp tip protrude between your knuckles and let her poke herself on the muzzle. This requires good timing, but after a few times, she'll decide you clearly have pointy bits she didn't know about. Keep your eyes on her head AT ALL TIMES! Don't turn your back to her, because she sounds like she may take advantage. But you can pretend you're not looking while still being aware of her head in your peripheral vision. 

Carry a whip to help encourage her to move her body (not to hit her with!). Make her move forward, back (lots of backing if she's not being cooperative), get her to move her shoulder, her hips. There are lots of ground work videos that can help. 

Ideally, you would get some help with this horse, but since her disrespect is happening on the ground, I would do ground work with her every single day for a while.


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## beau159 (Oct 4, 2010)

lisabutala said:


> A few months ago I bought a 14 year old quarter horse mare. For the first couple of weeks she was the sweetest thing. She did everything you asked and was very gentle. However, over the past month see has developed a very bad attitude. At first she just refused to move forward when riding, then she wouldn't lunge no matter how hard I tried. I have tried working with her, but recently she will pin her ears back and trot away if she sees the halter or a brush in my hand. Today, I was out in the coral with her and she walked up to me. I extended my hand to pet her and she pinned her ears back, slightly charged and threatened to bit. She has lightly bitten my dad's arm before when he tried putting on the halter, but she has never kicked or bucked and I don't want it to lead to that.
> 
> I feel like it is getting worse and I'm not sure what to do anymore. I've tried to work with her but I can't even get near her any more without having to worry about what she is going to do. *I talked to a trainer, but she wont be able to come up for a few months. *This is my first horse and I don't want to sell her, but its getting to the point where there is nothing I can do. I am only fifteen and my parents and I are not experts. I am good with horses, but I have never had this problem before. She does this all the time, in and out of season. *She is currently alone* and on my property. Please respond with any ideas, suggestions, or if you are or know a good trainer that can help and isn't too expensive.


A few months is much too long. This needs to get nipped in the bud now.

Most likely, you are inadvertantly letting her get away with bad behavior, so that is why the behavior is slowly getting worse. Her new owner probably corrected her which is why she was "fine" for about a month, as she slowly came to realize she could "do what she wants" in her new home.

Are there any other trainers that can help you?
How about her old owner - would they be available to help you?

Also, the fact that she is alone may make her more irritated. Horses are herd animals - they need other buddies around. Are you going to be getting her a companion of some kind? Not that it is an excuse for her, but it may be contributing to the problem.

Basically, your new mare has your number. If you've been unable to make progress with her by now, you have to find someone more experienced help you. 

In my book, there is no such thing as a "light bite". A bite is a bite. Period. And it is NOT to be tolerated.


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## Smilie (Oct 4, 2010)

Agree with what the horse people on this forum that I respect have said
Yes, pain as always should be ruled out. I think there should be a disclaimer to this effect, you can just click on and insert!
Yes, horses are herd animals, and while we train them to accept separation from their herd members, when we work with them or ride them, they are not designed to live alone.
However, that fact does not excuse ahrose from becoming aggressive, but you also have to accept that the horse might then have ulcers from stress, and perhaps sleep deprived, thus more likely to become reactive, as there are no other herd members to take a 'shift' far as look out
There is also the fact that horses become un trained as well as trained, and she might have found your leadership lacking, thus is assuming that role herself
You need to work with a good trainer, get at least a companion animal, to alleviate stress, and help her relax in her new home, which alone creates a better attitude, combined with correct handling, that is clear, but fair.


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## mckenzies (May 26, 2017)

Consider getting a goat or some sheep to keep her with. My horse has bonded with my goat, they're practically inseparable and I've noticed since they've been hanging out he's been much calmer. I agree with the suggestion the horse is stressed and probably developed ulcers. Try putting her on an ulcer gaurd.

Definitely nip this in the bud as soon as you can and start working with a good trainer. Maybe start with some gentle (no bull whips) ground work, if she'll let you.


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## JoBlueQuarter (Jan 20, 2017)

OP: @horselovinguy, and others gave some very good advice!


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## 288881 (Nov 12, 2020)

lisabutala said:


> A few months ago I bought a 14 year old quarter horse mare. For the first couple of weeks she was the sweetest thing. She did everything you asked and was very gentle. However, over the past month see has developed a very bad attitude. At first she just refused to move forward when riding, then she wouldn't lunge no matter how hard I tried. I have tried working with her, but recently she will pin her ears back and trot away if she sees the halter or a brush in my hand. Today, I was out in the coral with her and she walked up to me. I extended my hand to pet her and she pinned her ears back, slightly charged and threatened to bit. She has lightly bitten my dad's arm before when he tried putting on the halter, but she has never kicked or bucked and I don't want it to lead to that.
> I feel like it is getting worse and I'm not sure what to do anymore. I've tried to work with her but I can't even get near her any more without having to worry about what she is going to do. I talked to a trainer, but she wont be able to come up for a few months. This is my first horse and I don't want to sell her, but its getting to the point where there is nothing I can do. I am only fifteen and my parents and I are not experts. I am good with horses, but I have never had this problem before. She does this all the time, in and out of season. She is currently alone and on my property. Please respond with any ideas, suggestions, or if you are or know a good trainer that can help and isn't too expensive.


if she comes at you ears pinned in the pasture then make her move her feet . get the lunge wip and whenever she acts bad ly make her move her feet


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## kiwigirl (Sep 30, 2009)

I would look at this from a slightly different angle. My take on this is that your little mare has found herself in a new environment alone and has no sense of safety. Rather than say it is bad behaviour - though it is from our perspective - I would suggest that she is scared and very defensive, she is defending herself and her territory because she has found herself alone with no other herd to watch her back. 

If I was you I would spend some time observing her (from a distance) in her paddock. Does she seem hyper-vigilant? Do you ever see her standing quietly relaxing with her head down and a leg cocked or does she seem to be on edge, starting at every little sound? Does she graze quietly or does she snatch mouthfuls of food between constantly being on the alert and scanning for danger? Have you seen her lying down sleeping?

If she is exhibiting signs of distress when you are not present then this is anxiety and has nothing to do with whether she respects you, you won't even be part of the equation beyond being another thing she has to protect herself against. 
I agree with the others, you need some help but in the meantime I strongly suggest you find Warwick Schiller and also Mark Langley on youtube. These guys are both all about teaching us how to teach our horses how to find rest and relaxation with us. Watching videos by these two trainers may give you a better idea of what you are dealing with.


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## kiwigirl (Sep 30, 2009)

I'm sorry for the double post but I feel like I didn't communicate myself very well in my initial post.

I think that your mare started out very sweet and easy because she came from a place of where she knew her status and where established boundaries made her feel safe.

Now that she is in a new environment, an environment where there is no clear structure or boundaries she, in self defense, has to become the leader and her own protector. If this is the case then she will exhibit the signs that I wrote in my first post. Hyper-vigilance, she may pace around her paddock a lot, only snatch food between periods of watchfulness, give little spooks and starts at small things that you can't see. If this is the case then this is not her being disrespectful to you but instead the behaviour of a horse that is very anxious.

If on the other hand she is perfectly relaxed when alone in her paddock, grazes quietly paying little attention to her immediate environs, spends time standing relaxed with head down and a hind leg cocked, lays down at some stage during the day. If this is her behaviour and it only changes when you or someone in your family enters her paddock then the issue is a respect issue and you need help in how you deal with the mare. Though having said that, regardless of what is happening and why, as others have said, I think you still need help.

I stand by my Warwick Schiller, Mark Langley advice.


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## phantomhorse13 (Feb 18, 2011)

yet another thread that is years old.. the recommended reading strikes again?


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## kiwigirl (Sep 30, 2009)

Dammit! Am I on another ghost thread? Mental note - must learn to check thread dates lol.


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## loosie (Jun 19, 2008)

lisabutala said:


> She did everything you asked and was very gentle. However, over the past month see has developed a very bad attitude. At first she just refused to move forward when riding, then she wouldn't lunge no matter how hard I tried.


So esp if she has got so much worse since you've had her afraid it is very likely you - something you're doing or not doing. Can't tell you what that might be without more info. Great idea to find a trainer - perhaps you can find another who is available sooner, or experienced horse person? It could possibly come down to 'small stuff' such as bodylanguage & timing, which we can't help much with via a forum.

Refusing to move under saddle may well be due to pain. Whether it be the saddle(very common source of problem) or otherwise, have you had her looked at by a vet/good bodyworker/saddle fitter, etc, to rule out/address pain/discomfort?



> Today, I was out in the coral with her and she walked up to me. I extended my hand to pet her and she pinned her ears back, slightly charged and threatened to bit. She has lightly bitten my dad's arm before when he tried putting on the halter,


That sounds like she has 'got your number'(& your Dad's) as they say. Meaning she realises she can 'call the shots' because you don't know how to. As she has got worse & her behaviour has become dangerous, I strongly suggest you don't handle her further at all, at least without an experienced person on hand.



> She is currently alone and on my property.


As an aside, horses don't tend to do well alone. I'd budget for getting her a friend or few.


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## loosie (Jun 19, 2008)

Ah, just realised old thread


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## updownrider (Mar 31, 2009)

Did I post on this thread? Why am I getting an alert?


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## avjudge (Feb 1, 2011)

I realized this was a zombie thread when I got to a reply by Smilie. Now I'm sad.


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## JoBlueQuarter (Jan 20, 2017)

avjudge said:


> I realized this was a zombie thread when I got to a reply by Smilie. Now I'm sad.


same here...


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## horselovinguy (Oct 1, 2013)

Being this is a zombie thread {I like that description!} think we will close it with a mod note....

*MODERATORS NOTE:*
This thread is now more than 3 years old...
Because of the new forum platform/program all aged threads are suddenly resurrecting.
*To All Our Members:
PLEASE, please be aware of the dates of original posting so we are not ghosting or resurrecting zombie and time dated issues...*

With that, I will now *close this thread* and let it bury itself again...
If anyone needs it to be reopened, report it and tell us and it can be done, but closing will stop dredging up old.
_hlg... _🐴


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