# Moved to new barn 2 weeks ago and somebody already took my tack. Advice needed.



## TheAQHAGirl (Aug 10, 2012)

Okay I haven't been on here lately, hopefully everyone is doing well!

I have a small problem...So I moved to a new barn about 2 weeks ago. It's fantastic and I love it so much. I've been going there every day for 3-4 hours a day, there's so much to do and Faith is suuuuuppppper happy being there.

Basically another girl moved there about a week after I did, and she just got a new horse. So I go out to the barn to ride, and I notice some tack (bridles, one a hackamore) on my horse's stall (they just built the new indoor arena and they still need to add bridle hooks to my part of the tack room, so I have to hang my bridles on a portable bridle rack on my stall door). So it turns out that the tack is the new girl's tack, which is absolutely no big deal. 

So this is where it gets fishy. I notice that her and her boyfriend were fiddling around near my bridles, which at the moment I thought they were using their stuff. When I get off Faith to switch tack, I noticed that my curb chain was off my bit. What was ever weirder was that my bridle was hanging from its bit on the bridle rack (I always hang my bridles by the headstall)...So the next day I go to the girl and asked her if she had any idea where the curb chain went and she said no...My boyfriend was with me, who is a cop and is trained to know when people are lying, and later told me that he could tell that she was lying, etc. Well when they left I did a little snooping around and found my curb chain...On her hackamore...I could 110% tell it was mine.

However, my boyfriend advised me that it would be better if I didn't take it because I had no way to identify that it was mine, the only evidence I have is that I know what it looks like. I was talking to the barn owner and she mentioned that the girl, who took my curb chain, has had some bad things happen to her in the past, etc. She's taken a liking to her.

So my problem is, do I talk to the barn owner about this? Should I just take my curb chain back? Or should I let it go because it's just a curb chain and nothing that big?

I'm worried that if I let it go, then more of my tack will disappear. However, I already marked all of my tack with my initials in hidden spots so I can identify the tack if it gets stolen again. But, I also don't want to get the barn owner involved because I (and the girl) just moved here and I don't really want to cause a problem. And my other problem is that I can't go straight to her and tell her to give the chain back to me because I have no proof that it was mine.

I thought about telling the girl something along the lines of: "Hey I found the curb chain and I know who took it. I'm hoping that they will be responsible enough to come forward and bring it back." 

So that way she knows that I know that she took it. And it leaves the ball in her park. 

But then again I have no idea why I should be worried about it, since it is just a curb chain.

Any thoughts?


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## WildAtHeart (Jul 17, 2013)

What you plan to say to her sounds good. Just be sure not to be too "cold" about it... I'd say it in a very honest and calm way, not like you are threatening her, like you are giving her a way out 

Is there any chance that she doesn't know the chain is yours? Just a thought. 

Beyond that, I guess I'd see what happens. Be kind to her, no sense making an enemy. Hopefully she fixes things and it all smooths out.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## TheAQHAGirl (Aug 10, 2012)

WildAtHeart said:


> What you plan to say to her sounds good. Just be sure not to be too "cold" about it... I'd say it in a very honest and calm way, not like you are threatening her, like you are giving her a way out
> 
> Is there any chance that she doesn't know the chain is yours? Just a thought.
> 
> ...


Thanks WildatHeart. That was my idea, I don't want to be too accusing but at the same time I want her to know that I know it's her. I don't want to start off a potential friendship like this, so I don't want to make too much of a fuss...Plus I think if we do become friends it would be easier to talk about it, etc.

And I don't think there would be a chance. The rack was mine along with the tack, no one is supposed to put their tack on it (but like I said it's not a big deal if they do). And after I asked her if she knew where my curb chain was, she didn't bother looking at me. When I tried talking to her, she kept her head down and had quiet answers (like she didn't want anything to do with me).


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## stevenson (Sep 12, 2011)

if the BO likes her and feels sorry for her, and you say something, then you saying she took this or that will most likely cause a problem.
Lock up all your tack. Saddles bridles halters lead, brushes sprays hoof picks. Lock up Everything. If you cannot lock up everything, then take it home.
No one will have access to it but you .


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## Chasin Ponies (Dec 25, 2013)

Sadly this is something that sometimes happens when you board. Yes, it's just a curb chain but in reality it's only the beginning of the "borrowing". 
You'd think they would be ashamed to use your equipment in the same barn but they do it anyway.
I'd go to her and describe your curb chain and ask if she has seen it. Then, if you don't get it back put a note on your stall about a missing curb chain. Ask your barn owner when they will have more secure storage of your tack as your stuff is being messed with and coming up missing. If they aren't going to provide secure storage, ask where you can put a locking trunk.

Don't leave your really nice tack at the stable. It's a pain, but pack it back and forth in your car.

When you board, it's absolutely essential to mark _every single_ piece of equipment even the very smallest. I have a set of paint pens so that my markings won't get rubbed off and a vibrating metal marker that works fine on leather. On the tiny stuff, put your initial on them. As you said, you have to be able to walk up, get it and _prove_ that it's yours.

I've had this sort of "borrowing" go on all the time with boarding, sometimes it's innocent, sometimes not. Once someone has used your stuff for a period of time, they forget that it's yours!


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## BigNickMontana (Aug 5, 2013)

Locks keep honest people honest. 

There is really no point in confronting her at this point because you can't prove it. 

If you are going to confront her wait till you can, then it carries some weight. 

Marking all of your things is a good idea.

Really all you can do is chalk this one up to lessons learned.


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## horselovinguy (Oct 1, 2013)

Replace your curb chain...a new one is cheap enough. I understand though that is not the issue but it being taken is...
In the future put all your stuff in a locked trunk only you have a key for or take it out of the barn. A saddle rack that locks will also protect your saddle from someone trying it out occasionally too....again, you have the key to those padlocks.
Leave a halter and shank, that's it. Nothing more. 
Put name plates on those or do mark them as many halters look identical and can be innocently taken.
When it becomes blanket time, your blankets need marking in several places. 
I do the inside on the sizing/care label and I also put my last name down the center seam _{exterior} _and along the trim _{interior} _that edges that entire blanket. I also do surcingles inside where they double back and is not seen nor get dirty._ 
This helps too if you have professional blanket cleaning done to get your stuff back, no chance for a oops!!_

Now I know there are different types of curb chains, buckle on and such.
Why not look into the kind like a English bridle uses with the hook that is crimped on to the bit and then the chain is placed on the other hook end and it is crimped shut... no chance of it disappearing or being borrowed if it can't be removed.
As you said your main tack is already marked....

You might just let it be known regarding your equipment quietly in passing...
_"Yes, I've had the problem before of things gone missing so now *absolutely everything* {emphasize this} is marked and photographed so I can identify it and prove it to the police if necessary." _ 
Quite a bombshell to drop...... and should stop sticky fingers too. 
Just make sure what you say is indeed true and you can back it all up if necessary. :wink:

I would mention it to the B/O in passing..._no accusations either!_
"I must have dropped my curb chain when putting my tack away...if anyone turns one in mine went gone.... Thanks."
If this girl has sticky fingers it won't be just you missing items and others will be speaking of it to the B/O too I bet..._again, no names or accusing anyone!
_
_jmo..._


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## anndankev (Aug 9, 2010)

I also would be


> worried that if I let it go, then more of my tack will disappear.


.

If her bridles/ hackamores/headstalls were still on my stall door I would switch it back to my bridle and use it that day. Only the advice from my boyfriend who is a cop (if I had one) would keep me from doing so. I would talk to him again.

If she indeed did take it from you, then it is doubtful she would report it. If she does report it you can 'return' it citing that you were going to use that bridle and did not notice that it was not yours due to it's being with your things. Maybe going on to suggest that she not use your stall front to keep her her things.

Then again I am pinching pennies to get by, over 60 years old and still having to work off board. Even $6 to $10 represents the cost of feeding my cat for a month.


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## Horseychick87 (Feb 5, 2014)

'Borrowing' is a far too common occurrence at boarding barns unfortunately. It is sad that people have to lock down their things, but it must be done.

I know of a woman that had three very nice show bridles stolen from her tack trunk in front of her stall (there was no tack room.) She finally got one of those travel bridle bags and attached a lock to the zipper and would lock it down when she was done.
Four months after a trouble boarder was kicked out the BM found her bridles in the girls old trunk. (The barn provided the trunks, hence why it was left.) 

As was mentioned, photograph your tack, let everyone know it's marked and photographed and that you may even know who took the chain, but are hoping they do the right thing and return it.

If you're still uneasy then put your most treasured items in your car and carry them with you.


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## churumbeque (Dec 20, 2009)

You might mention to the barn owner that some items came up missing and see if she knows who might have borrowed them. At least that way you plant a seed in the BO mind in case others have stuff missing.
Then the BO wont think it odd when you lock up your items either. Marking won't matter if they take it off property.


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## cebee (Apr 4, 2010)

I had a CA lead rope and rope halter 'disappear' while I was on a short 15 min trail ride from the barn... had it tied to a ring... came back and it was gone. I put a note up on the white board we use to communicate... nothing. Finally went snooping thru the unlocked tack lockers... and found it in the BOs husbands locker! I quietly took it back. Mentioned later that I found it. Never said where. NOT like he could exactly come take it back! So if it were me.. I would quietly take my curb strap back. Mention that I had found it some obscure place that you must have 'dropped it". She will know. She will know YOU know. But no one gets called out for stealing. 
That said... I would keep anything that I cant stand to lose locked in your car etc. 
( daughter had her trailer pin stolen off her trailer.. now who would do THAT?? Oh well... it is a sad fact of boarding... )


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## churumbeque (Dec 20, 2009)

cebee said:


> I had a CA lead rope and rope halter 'disappear' while I was on a short 15 min trail ride from the barn... had it tied to a ring... came back and it was gone. I put a note up on the white board we use to communicate... nothing. Finally went snooping thru the unlocked tack lockers... and found it in the BOs husbands locker! I quietly took it back. Mentioned later that I found it. Never said where. NOT like he could exactly come take it back! So if it were me.. I would quietly take my curb strap back. Mention that I had found it some obscure place that you must have 'dropped it". She will know. She will know YOU know. But no one gets called out for stealing.
> That said... I would keep anything that I cant stand to lose locked in your car etc.
> ( daughter had her trailer pin stolen off her trailer.. now who would do THAT?? Oh well... it is a sad fact of boarding... )


Most likely the husband just grabbed and used it not thinking it wasnt his. My guess is it didnt click with him on the board. Hopefully anyway he isnt a thief but ignorant instead. LOL


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## LoriF (Apr 3, 2015)

I am now starting to mark all of my things where I board. I really think that my stuff disappears innocently but it doesn't matter when you have bought the same hoof pick five times now. It gets old. I would have taken back my curb strap and immediately put my initials on it. And then tell the girl you found it.

Keep in mind that my answer is coming from a person who is already tired of replacing trinkets.


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## Saddlebag (Jan 17, 2011)

Rubberrmaid makes a good strong box for the back of a truck which is perfect as a tack trunk. Get a good stout lock, preferable a combination lock so you don't have to worry about a key and lock everything up. It's called an Action Packer and comes in a few different sizes. Get the largest, 181 L, about 43" long. I've fit a western saddle in there, a close fit top to bottom, but with enough room for other stuff. Mine is about 12 yrs old and still like new but it's inside, not in the truck.


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## bkylem (Sep 21, 2013)

I would also consider placing a note on my trunk that read "All tack has been labeled for security". Very simple, but it makes a clear point


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## mred (Jan 7, 2015)

Sad part of life. But even friends/relatives borrow things and keep them for so long that they think that they own them. I have even had relatives sale things that they borrowed from me and tell me about selling that stuff in a yard sale. I agree, label and lock it up. If a friend wants to borrow, let them sign for it. Explain, that it is so you won't forget where it is at.


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## Saskia (Aug 26, 2009)

Untunately this happens all the time and making a big deal out of it can jeopardize your boarding situation. No barn manager likes the high maintenance boarder.

The safest thing to do would probably be to leave it and buy a new one. I couldn't do that, it would just grate me. If I was sure it was mine I'd take it back, but probably just buy a new different looking one, keeping the old one at home.

I take all my gear in the car with me.


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## Pegasicorn (Jun 21, 2015)

Is it possible that she used your curb chain on accident and is frightened about confessing? I remember you mentioning that she had been using your bridle hooks, etc.

When I had a horse in 2010, a couple agreed to let me borrow a saddle of theirs until I was able to purchase my own. I got confused and used the husband's saddle by mistake because it looked identical to the one they were loaning to me. I felt so bad about it that I was fighting tears when apologizing and even relocated all of my tack and supplies to a different barn. Unfortunately, the couple turned nasty and had the rest of the boarders calling me a thief, even when I hadn't been at the barn for two weeks due to a scheduled vacation with my dad. The incident was traumatizing and I ended up selling my horse — leaving all of my belongings there — and never looked back. Most have questioned my response to the situation, but at the time, I was a timid fourteen-year-old who had been emotionally and verbally abused at home by my mother. With that in mind, I think I have a valid reason to be frightened when it comes to confrontation. You mentioned that the owner of the barn has taken a liking to the new boarder, who has a history of having "_bad things_" happening to her. Perhaps this is her reason for not confessing if she unintentionally took it.

If the curb chain was intentionally taken, however; I would simply let her keep it due to the fact that you have no evidence against her and pointing fingers might hurt your relationship with the owner of the barn. All I can recommend is that you label what's yours and be more cautious about what you leave in the open from now on. Lock your tack up and it will keep people honest.


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## Reiningcatsanddogs (Oct 9, 2014)

"Trust everyone, but brand your cattle."


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## DuckDodgers (May 28, 2013)

Lock your stuff up, it will solve your problems. Permanently label everything that you wouldn't mind replacing if certain items MUST be left out. Even then, labeling items won't prevent them from leaving the barn or items like fly spray being used without permission. Just means that you can prove it's your bridle on someone else's horse if it comes down to that. There are some very nice ready-made tack trunks out there, and plans that you can use to build your own if you're handy or know someone that is. Make something of reasonable size (not enormous, but big enough to hold your saddle, bridle, and basic grooming/care supplies) and you could easily put it in the tack room or in front of your stall. A vertical orientation takes up very little floor space and can look quite nice. If the BO questions why you're putting your stuff in a locker simply say "It's just for security purposes. I had some issues with people borrowing tack without permission at a previous barn, so I like to be protected!"

If you really can't lock your stuff up then I would recommend taking everything back and forth from the barn with you. It's a royal pain in the butt, but better than having your stuff "borrowed" or stolen. 

I would write the curb chain off as a loss, but I would mention to the BO and the girl that it went missing from your bridle and you would love to have it returned if someone finds it. You're not directly accusing anyone, but if the girl took it then she will know that you're very aware of its absence. It alerts the BO to the fact that something has gone missing so if strange stuff happens in the future she'll be aware, but it doesn't make you look bad by accusing people without proof. It also means that if the curb chain did just randomly fall off or something that someone will return it to you if found :grin: This is NOT the sort of thing that I would let slide, but you'll probably look foolish if you start accusing people straight off. 

For the sake of clarity I would politely ask the girl to find a new home for her stuff. Unless the girl is on pasture board she also has a stall on which she can hang her belongings, and those bridle hangers are cheap. Even if she is on pasture board it's the BO's responsibility to provide space for each boarder to keep their stuff, not other boarders' responsibility to share their stall. Personally, I like to keep my horse's stuff in his own area. Even if "borrowing" wasn't an issue I wouldn't be too thrilled with someone putting their stuff with my stuff


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