# Fear of Fast Trotting/Loping (for a friend)



## stevenson (Sep 12, 2011)

are you sitting the trot or posting ? The horse can feel you tense , remember to breathe and look forward not down .


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## EmberScarlet (Oct 28, 2016)

stevenson said:


> are you sitting the trot or posting ? The horse can feel you tense , remember to breathe and look forward not down .


I can't seem to be able to maintain a post while going that fast.  I get even more frightened and have that sickening ghost feeling of pitching over.


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## stevenson (Sep 12, 2011)

ember, are you riding short stirrups or long / maybe adjust your stirrup length. Do you feel like you are falling forward or sideways ? You should go to your instructor and tell her/him that you are fearful and explain how you feel, he/she may have an easy solution. 
Your legs should not go numb .


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## EmberScarlet (Oct 28, 2016)

stevenson said:


> ember, are you riding short stirrups or long / maybe adjust your stirrup length. Do you feel like you are falling forward or sideways ? You should go to your instructor and tell her/him that youI are fearful and explain how you feel, he/she may have an easy solution.
> Your legs should not go numb .


My friend is no longer here atm. I'll ask her any questions tomorrow and she'll bilk answer.


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## Horsef (May 1, 2014)

Maybe the instructor is pushing this girl too fast. If she only started in October and had one lesson a week, that's only about 25 lessons. If she's not able to post at a fast trott, she's not reqdy to lope - most probably. Now, a bit of advice: it is difficult to get a horse to lope/canter from that bumpy disjointed trott. Rather bring them back into a nice trott and try again.


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## phantomhorse13 (Feb 18, 2011)

This sounds like an issue that needs to be seriously discussed with the trainer. It is one thing to push someone a bit out of their comfort zone, it's another to scary the pants off them. It can be embarrassing to admit to being scared, but it's possible the instructor doesn't realize your friend is feeling the way she is.

The horses being used also don't sound ideal to be learning on, if they need to be constantly pushed to maintain the gait. How is the girl supposed to be able to focus on herself and learning if the horse is constantly breaking gait? Can the instructor put the horse on a longe line or in a round pen, so s/he is in charge of the speed and your friend can just concentrate on her position?


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## Dustbunny (Oct 22, 2012)

Major agreement with Phantomhorse!
It's hard to perform requested tasks when scared spitless. We all (well, most of us) know the fear of a rider is transferred right down the reins to the horse. It sounds like this girl needs a horse that is a pro at a jog trot for starters. I really feel for her. A serious chat with the instructor would be helpful, hopefully.
It sounds like your friend wants to be successful. It just might take her a little longer, and that's not a bad thing.


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## Reiningcatsanddogs (Oct 9, 2014)

I have a horse with no less than three "gears" of trot (supposed to be a TWH but, has never shown any sign of gaiting) he also didn't like to lope/canter for the longest time. He has one gear that I nicknamed his kidney buster. After birthing five children, trust me, he can bounce the pee right out of you! 

Anyway, the secret is to laugh. Grab an "Oh crap" strap if you are riding English or the horn if you are riding western and ride it out. Doesn't have to be pretty or proper...just stay on and cue until you get them into the lope. We can get so afraid of not doing it "right" that we become our own worst enemy. It can hurt our confidence in ourselves and our horses.

When you are learning (which is always), not taking yourself too seriously is really important. When it gets scary is when you are trying to stay "perfect" and deal with something that is beyond your ability at that time to deal with. Learn when to let "perfect" go and do what you need to do to get the job done. You will be amazed at how much that can change your fear factor. "Perfect" will come with time.

I have a daughter your age and until last year, she was afraid to lope...would get all uptight about it and the horse would just ignore her cues, going into a faster and faster trot, never rolling into the lope, because she was all tense. I think the horse sensed her hesitation and in a way was taking care of her by not doing the thing she was so afraid of. 

It wasn't until we were out on the trails and I loped out in front of her and her horse naturally followed (I know, I'm a mean momma), catching her by surprise, that she realized it wasn't so bad, actually easier to sit than the trot, that she started to relax. Now she cues and the horse will slide easily into the lope for her. Same horse but, inside, she is a different rider.

My $.02.


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## EmberScarlet (Oct 28, 2016)

Horsef said:


> Maybe the instructor is pushing this girl too fast. If she only started in October and had one lesson a week, that's only about 25 lessons. If she's not able to post at a fast trott, she's not reedy to lope - most probably. Now, a bit of advice: it is difficult to get a horse to lope/canter from that bumpy disjointed trot. Rather bring them back into a nice trott and try again.





phantomhorse13 said:


> This sounds like an issue that needs to be seriously discussed with the trainer. It is one thing to push someone a bit out of their comfort zone, it's another to scary the pants off them. It can be embarrassing to admit to being scared, but it's possible the instructor doesn't realize your friend is feeling the way she is.
> 
> The horses being used also don't sound ideal to be learning on, if they need to be constantly pushed to maintain the gait. How is the girl supposed to be able to focus on herself and learning if the horse is constantly breaking gait? Can the instructor put the horse on a longe line or in a round pen, so s/he is in charge of the speed and your friend can just concentrate on her position?


Here's what she says;

''Bringing them back down is great advice! I tried it once, but my legs were too goopy, and I ended up getting my feet shoved through the stirrups. It's a little annoying, but in the midst of my panic when getting them to lope, my trainer still asks me to keep this herd bound animal away from the other person in the lesson, which makes it _really_ hard. I can do that just fine otherwise. As for posting, I can post while doing a _controlled _fast trot. Actually, it's a lot easier then a slower one. It's when they are suspended between the two gaits they throws me off. It's runaway trot I guess.

And for telling her, your exactly right, it's really embarrassing! I'll seem like a chicken ... 
I do really want to do a line lesson, so I can get comfy. I don't think I'll be ready to be better if I don't! I haven't been back since I came up with that idea, so I'll ask on Wednesday. 

And, no. The horses aren't ideal and everyone knows it. I'm actually learning at my dad's friend's barn where they have a trainer staying, so I'm riding a lazy horse and an ex-rodeo horse. I would've been riding a Fjord (that was a really, REALLY good ride) but she was sold and taken. ''


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## horselovinguy (Oct 1, 2013)

Chicken????
No, realizing you are not ready nor have the right horse to ride learning to lope is adult....
Pushing yourself past a comfort level that you are "out of control" is a dumb idea of said "trainer"....

There is no timeline saying you must be loping in this many lessons.
You need to be ready and confident in your ability to go the next step.
You describe horses who are not willing lesson horses and a "trainer" who is not very astute to your needs and fears..
You mention an awful lot of things that are _"red flag"_ danger issues in a few short sentences... :frown_color:

_*Slow down...*_

My thought is why are you riding here under a trainer you not trust the judgement of?

Just because the barn is somehow something to do with a friend of dads does not make it a good barn to take instruction at nor safe horses to learn on..._there is a difference!
Not every "trainer" is a riding instructor either, fact!
_:cowboy:....


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## EmberScarlet (Oct 28, 2016)

horselovinguy said:


> Chicken????
> No, realizing you are not ready nor have the right horse to ride learning to lope is adult....
> Pushing yourself past a comfort level that you are "out of control" is a dumb idea of said "trainer"....
> 
> ...


*Her reply. *
''I feel like she's a good trainer for a lot of things, but there is a lot I don't like, too. She rules the horses more by fear and respect then understanding and firmness. 
Um, I don't know if I can switch tho. We aren't the richest family, and she's close and inexpensive thanks to her being a family friend. I think my only choice would be to continue with her, or quit, and I don't want to quit. I wanna keep riding. I think it would be a good idea would be to ask her to do a longe lesson. She did it with my little sister for something else, so I'm pretty sure she can.
Maybe I could find a new trainer, but I would feel really bad about it ...''


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## horselovinguy (Oct 1, 2013)

Your safety is what is most important, not a trainers ego!

Be safe what ever you do!
:runninghorse2:....


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## Acadianartist (Apr 21, 2015)

In my opinion, Ember's friend, you are moving too fast. If you are feeling panicky, you are not able to process information and send it to the right muscle at the right time. This type of "freezing" and anxiety will not help you progress, only set you up for disaster. 

You need to talk to the instructor about slowing down a bit. You need to feel calm and in control before moving on to the next step, even if it takes a year or more of walking and trotting. An adult in my class told me she'd never cantered - she has four horses! I was sure she'd cantered lots of times, but nope. Did years of just walking and trotting, but wanted to learn to canter. The first time she did it, I could hear her audibly gulping and breathing. It's ok to take your time. If the instructor doesn't want to to that, you need to find a new instructor. There is so much more to riding than just going faster and faster! Especially when you're not ready!

Finally, since you say you have anxiety when driving too, you might try some visualization exercises. Practice these when you're not riding, in a quiet, relaxing place. Even in bed, before falling asleep. Visualize yourself riding a nice, gentle, controlled canter. Do it over and over again, perhaps to calm, soothing music. Before a lesson, try to visualize yourself doing it again. It sounds like you're convincing yourself that things are going to go wrong and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. I know all about that - after a serious accident, I developed anxiety about driving. I'd be driving along and would actually picture a big truck slamming into me head on or something. Having a vivid imagination did not help. When those thoughts come, you have to replace them with positive thoughts of being calm and in control, perhaps having a lovely ride and feeling good about it. 

I hope you find a way to deal with this anxiety Ember's friend! If you don't, it will control other parts of your life too. Take it slow, but don't give up because then you would just be letting it control you.


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## Yogiwick (Sep 30, 2013)

First of all- *THIS IS COMPLETELY NORMAL*

Second, do sit down and talk to your instructor. They are there to help you and oftentimes pushing through fear is best, she needs to realize exactly how you feel and come up with a plan that is more appropriate to you.

While refusing to canter is pretty typical school horse behavior, or really any horse as I'm sure it's tricky for you to ask right at this point, I agree that these aren't the best horses to learn on.. Keep in mind that a horse that picks up a canter easily at this point for you is likely the type to not react appropriately if you get scared or unbalanced. There is a reason the less sensitive and lazy horses are good school horses. Either try a different horse or take some lunge lessons. I think being on a lunge line at least until you get a feel for the gait itself is a really great starting point as you don't have to go through the very awkward picking up the canter phase (again THIS IS COMPLETELY NORMAL).

Another good idea is picking it up from the walk. This may not be appropriate for all horses but I can tell you when I was working on really sitting the canter properly, despite "knowing how to canter" for years, going walk -> canter made a huge difference for me. It completely eliminates that horrible bouncy fast trot that is not only uncomfortable and scary it's completely counter productive to just about everything.

_And it doesn't matter if the OP can post that trot or not as she needs to be sitting to canter._ Irrelevant. A walk gets you in a comfortable safe position and allows you to focus on yourself and on PROPERLY cuing the horse (can't cue if you're bouncing everywhere!) When you're able to do that the canter transition will be smoother and more controlled.

From extensive experience I truly believe the cue/transition is the hardest part. If you can't do it from a walk try to do it from a slow trot WITHOUT the horse speeding up. A well trained horse can do that just fine. Unfortunately many school horses are allowed to just run into a canter as you're experiencing, try NOT to let the horse do that.

As far as being able to canter a few laps then getting scared- again TALK TO THE INSTRUCTOR. Fear and anxiety are part of riding. In fact you can do a ton of research on that, they even have seminars, I mean seriously, if you ride horses you ARE somewhat crazy  A good instructor should be able to help extend your comfort zone so you are suddenly cantering 5 laps, then 10, then jumping courses or whatever. Don't feel like there's something wrong with you or that you're over reacting. We have ALL been there, and some people more than others... I know plenty of experienced adults with major fear issues and some for good reason (bad fall or what not). You are just learning. It's ok to be worried about things... I'd be worried if you weren't!


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## Smilie (Oct 4, 2010)

Just skimmed,but agree a lot with what has been said.
There is also the fact, that there can be an extended trot, with the hrose using himself correctly, and then there can be the hollowed out ground pounding trot, with horse pulling on the reins, being quick legged, and very rough, that certainly would be a stumbling block for any beginner rider, not able to make the horse move correctly, stay light in the hands and rhythmic in stride, thus feel like they are loosing control.
The canter or lope is very easy to sit, and legs should not get tired, unless gripping or needing to 'pedell that horse to keep him loping


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## Chasin Ponies (Dec 25, 2013)

First of all, your friend needs to accept the fact that a relationship with an instructor/trainer is a business arrangement, not generally a close, personal friendship. The instructor simply provides a service for money. If you go to a store where you are not happy with the service, would you continue to go back? Probably not. There is no need to be "afraid" to move your money elsewhere. You have the right to "fire" the instructor and try someone else. But, it's also not fair to avoid communicating with the instructor when you feel something isn't right.

That said, understand that virtually every single beginner experiences nervousness and at least some fear (sometimes a lot of fear)when moving up to the faster gaits. Part of learning to ride (and even just handling horses) requires a person to accept that fear and work on moving past it. A good instructor will recognize a student who is not ready for that next step but it's also frustrating to see that a student is ready for the next step but won't take it!

In the end, fear is only reduced only by "miles in the saddle". The more your friend practices the faster gaits, even if it's only for very short time periods, the better and more confident she will become. She should probably be practicing this only on the lunge line for now. Equitation details and nit picking should come after the confidence arrives.

I had one little girl who loved horses but even on the ground, she was terrified every second. She'd stand as far away from the horse as she possibly could even while grooming. She remained cantering only on the lunge line for 3 full years and was still afraid. In the 3rd year while she was on the rail, I yelled out, OK-now let's canter (and I was actually just joking) and surprise, surprise! She put that horse right into the canter with a great big smile on her face! A true break-through moment! There is no strict time table when learning to ride.

I noticed that kids in lessons have a tendency to compare their riding skills with other kids and feel insecure and inadequate if they aren't keeping up the rest. This can be very destructive as they don't realize that in any sport, everyone advances at their own pace.


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## Lilah (Jan 24, 2017)

*Thank you...*



Reiningcatsanddogs said:


> I have a horse with no less than three "gears" of trot (supposed to be a TWH but, has never shown any sign of gaiting) he also didn't like to lope/canter for the longest time. He has one gear that I nicknamed his kidney buster. After birthing five children, trust me, he can bounce the pee right out of you!
> 
> Anyway, the secret is to laugh. Grab an "Oh crap" strap if you are riding English or the horn if you are riding western and ride it out. Doesn't have to be pretty or proper...just stay on and cue until you get them into the lope. We can get so afraid of not doing it "right" that we become our own worst enemy. It can hurt our confidence in ourselves and our horses.
> 
> ...



I'm printing this off. I'm reading it every day. I like to check how others are coping, and this answer calms my heart in so many ways. I use laughter to get myself through all kinds of tough spots, why didn't I think of using it with my mare, as well? THANK YOU


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## Joel Reiter (Feb 9, 2015)

First of all, I think your current instructor is an incompetent sadist. Doing the same thing over and over and being terrified every time will never make you confident. Confidence comes from doing the scary thing and finding out it isn't as frightening as you thought. Confidence comes from doing the scary thing and it turns out to be fun and nothing goes wrong. The situation you are in is liable to make you worse, not better. You would be better off with a different horse, a different instructor, a different technique, or something.

Since there are reasons why changing would be difficult, let's see if we can work within your current disadvantages.

Being frightened is God's way of telling you that you are about to die, so pay attention. There is nothing wrong with being afraid. I am the biggest chicken in the world of horses. Don't feel bad about being scared. It is absolutely normal and might keep you from doing something stupid some day.

Visualization, as Acadianartist mentioned, is extremely valuable in overcoming fear. If you can imagine yourself getting that horse into a canter quickly and successfully, and then loping around the ring all relaxed and smiling, you are half way to making it happen. Your present state of mind is making your sessions kind of miserable for the horse as well. Horses aren't really that smart. It's actually pretty easy to fool them by pretending you are confident. Sometimes I find it helps me relax to pretend I am telepathic and carry on a mental conversation with the horse. You might find that helps you see the problem from his side. Anyway, visualization is a key means to overcome fear and achieve anything, and it used by speakers, athletes, and performers to accomplish things that would be otherwise impossible.

Also, after you give your canter cue, whatever it is that your instructor teaches, if the horse doesn't pick up the canter immediately, it might be helpful to give the horse a reasonably firm smack. A nagging cue can make a horse dull, and it happens to lesson horses a lot. Sometimes a horse just needs to know you really mean it, and right now you have to sympathize with the horse who is getting one signal from the cue and an opposite one from your state of mind.

Be safe and have fun.


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## EmberScarlet (Oct 28, 2016)

Alright! So my friend rode her first trail, and did absolutely SPLENDID getting the horses to lope. She wasn't scared, and had a great time! The improvement was obvious! <3 
She'd like to thank @Horsef for the advice to pull the horses back down, because it worked like a charm. <3 

Thank you all! She's no longer afraid, and she's learning now.


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