# What to Look for In a new trainer/Barn Etiquette



## thecolorcoal (Jan 28, 2015)

Long story short (in journal) I am leaving my "new" barn of 8 months after an infectious disease took one of our barn's horses and left the rest exposed. The barn has now been "tainted" in our very small, very close-minded equestrian community where I board. I tried to call my good hauling friend to trailer me out to my new barn, and despite being negative for this disease she would not step foot on the property for fear of catching our cooties. The barn has been verified as clean but has scared the BO's manureless and it looks like operations are closing down for liability concerns.

Therefore I am leaving my barn, my old trainer and my horse leaser. I did my best to end things clean but unfortunately both were upset at my decision and did not decide to let me go without a fight, so things are strained.

My new barn is a huge facility with over 400 boarded horses on 50 acres of land, a full jump arena and indoor which is rare in california. The best part is they have QUITE a few good trainers on property who deal with all sorts of sports. I ride dressage and hunters, but I met two boarders today who were willing to take me and Tyra out on some trail rides and even help me expose her. At our other barn no one would trail ride with me because Tyra was green and needed help, and it was too scary to deal with the bucking baby in the back.

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ANYWAY - sorry, i got off topic for a second but here's the gist:

Watching lessons today with the two trainers I have zoned in on has revealed there are severe, SEVERE holes in the way that my old trainer operated. She was my first and only personal horse trainer, so now that I have an opportunity to start over and reflect on our old methods, I would like advice from those with more experience than me. This is a GREAT opportunity for me to start over and will be my third barn. I am two barn experiences wiser, but two is not twenty. I am still new at this

Things old trainer did:

 Would provide one training ride a week but would not go into detail about how it went
 barely answered texts and calls regarding questions
 disregarded my concerns about methods
 disregarded my concerns about health/soundness and told me they were behavioral issues
 told me issues i was having did not exist because they "didn't happen with her"
 didn't give clear instructions on how to execute specific movements - would teach the horse and then try and get the horse to do it even when i had no idea how to ask

now that I can look back and see I am finding there were issues with this trainer all along. We had to use spurs with my horse because she would not move forward into a very "round" (i've had this discussion before) frame. I was told to seesaw the bit which my previous trainer before this one told me not to do. This trainer never emphasized leg to hand. This trainer didn't teach me about the outside rein. And the more I think of it the more I realize these were the same methods Jessie used when I trained with her.

HOWEVER there were results but _only when trainer rode her_. For the life of me I could not get tyra to move the way the trainer could, no matter what methods she had me use.

The new trainer is VERY different. Today I watched her get a slow-moving draft to trot with just the rider picking up their seat, and the horse was in a frame with a light contact, way lighter than what I use. I am so eager to ride with this lady and see what she can teach me that is different, but I feel like I cannot trust myself in my choices with horse professionals.

What should one look for when searching for a new trainer? Sorry for the story, I just wanted to give background. I believe this lady is an FEI rider but she rides SO differently than how I have been taught. I am nervous. I want to know I am getting correct instruction.


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## AnitaAnne (Oct 31, 2010)

When I look for a new instructor (trainer to me seems more about the horse and less about the rider) I first do my research. What are their personal achievements? How high a level have they shown? How well do their students do? Are the instructor's students successful? 


My last Dressage instructor would only accept students that showed the ability and desire to work hard. I was honored to be accepted as a student. First I managed to get in on a clinic she was at, and asked if she would take me on as a pupil. She liked my horse, and liked me, so after a few questions instructed me to email her for dates and times. She had remarked that I was the only rider she had to slow the trot down on when I entered the covered arena. Everyone else was lacking impulsion


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## thecolorcoal (Jan 28, 2015)

AnitaAnne said:


> When I look for a new instructor (trainer to me seems more about the horse and less about the rider) I first do my research. What are their personal achievements? How high a level have they shown? How well do their students do? Are the instructor's students successful?
> 
> 
> My last Dressage instructor would only accept students that showed the ability and desire to work hard. I was honored to be accepted as a student. First I managed to get in on a clinic she was at, and asked if she would take me on as a pupil. She liked my horse, and liked me, so after a few questions instructed me to email her for dates and times. She had remarked that I was the only rider she had to slow the trot down on when I entered the covered arena. Everyone else was lacking impulsion


that's a great story anita, thank you!! i am not sure if this lady is just an instructor or if she does training rides too. i am definitely looking for someone who has the potential to be both a horse trainer and a coach! but also someone who is going to engage in conversation and take my concerns about my riding and horse seriously... <3


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## Dreamcatcher Arabians (Nov 14, 2010)

thecolorcoal said:


> that's a great story anita, thank you!! i am not sure if this lady is just an instructor or if she does training rides too. i am definitely looking for someone who has the potential to be both a horse trainer and a coach! but also someone who is going to engage in conversation and take my concerns about my riding and horse seriously... <3


Talk to this lady before you sign up to ride with her. Ask her all of your questions and concerns and listen to what she says. Ask what she does to get the horse that light and be prepared for her to tell you that she can do it fairly quickly (experience riding/training multiple horses over time) and that it will take you considerably longer to get that and keep it consistently. My dressage trainer can get my horse in a nice round frame and doesn't have to yank on her head, as a matter of fact is telling me frequently to not use so much hand, and can support her and get her to round up very easily where I'm still learning and have to really work to get there. Ask about her methods, look for the red flags that make you say, "HMMMMMM not sure I agree with that." and then come back here and spell out what's bothering you and see what several people here have to say. Tell her the horse has some pretty big holes in its training, see how she wants to fix them. My trainer and I did a lot of ground work first, then she got on the horse. She 'fixed' 95% of the issues before she ever stepped in the stirrup. The other 5% had to do with my mare getting insecure when alone in the arena and having mini tantrums when she didn't get her way. After 5 months, she's a different horse.


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## TXhorseman (May 29, 2014)

When looking for a trainer, asked to observe some lessons with others. Ask for a trial lesson before committing to a longer contract if one is required.

Show awards demonstrate that an individual was good at winning shows. This should also demonstrate that the individual is a good rider.

Other individuals may be good riders but not have show awards. They may never have showed for various reasons.

Being a good rider -- having shown or not -- does not necessarily make a good instructor. Good riders often do things to affect their riding that they may not be aware of. If they don't realize this, they will not be able to pass these things on to others. A good instructor should also be adaptable, changing methods to suite individual riders and individual horses.


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## horselovinguy (Oct 1, 2013)

Dreamcatcher Arabians said:


> Talk to this lady before you sign up to ride with her.
> 
> Ask her all of your questions and concerns and listen to what she says.
> Ask about her methods, look for the red flags that make you say, "HMMMMMM not sure I agree with that."
> Tell her the horse has some pretty big holes in its training, see how she wants to fix them.


All good points...
However... because you don't agree with it does not mean it is wrong..
You just admitted you have had some bad training put to you too...
Not only does your horse have some pretty big holes, so do you if honest.
Speak to the instructor you are interested in riding with...
Some places like what you describe, not every instructor does lower level lessons but you start with those instructors that give a solid base foundation then move on to the more advanced instructor and finish your riding career with the "Grand Prix level instructors/riders of excellence..."
Honestly, it is a waste to start at the top needing them to do basics...it is _not_ their forte'.
You would do better to start with a foundation instruction instructor, fill in the holes and move on.
The less holes found the faster you move ahead and up the degree of difficulty...but you must start at the bottom and build a base or you will topple over.
Most don't do well with a inverted pyramid.. 
The better fit is form a solid base and then more detailed and precise the instruction level as the fine-tuning takes place...
This is not going to be easy on you either...a lot of what you think as correct is going to be told, " no, you're wrong" in many things if you are accurate in your assessment of your recent past instructor.
You _are_ a product of your environment in learning...taught or absorbed...
If you are taught wrong/incorrectly you know no better or have anything to compare till good, competent instruction comes along...then it is holy-cow!! :shock:

Exactly what you are now discovering.
As for leaving, well, if the barn is closing then not many choices. 

A clean break from a bad situation, instruction and a share boarder with the same taught principles is probably best...
Expect to be evaluated and be told, _not asked but told_ who you will ride with.
Facilities like these, with what you are seeing produce equestrians who win and do well at competitions...that is a highly profitable business and will be run as such...something you will also need to learn about.
It is very different to go from a small operation to one of hundreds of animals to care for and lessons taught to as many or more students of varying skill levels on a weekly basis...
This place works like a well-oiled machine...with exacting precise care and routine daily.

Expect some shock...there will be a lot at first.
You need the exacting price list of charges places like this charge their boarders...a "look" is required and kept by the barn doing for you, _period_.
Top-notch places are that way because all follow the same rules, no excuses...from the riders looks, tack-trunks, saddles...just everything in some of these places are dictated to you...be prepared and the best of luck.
I hope sincerely you enjoy the differences and challenges you now face...:|
:runninghorse2:... 
_jmo..._


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## Dreamcatcher Arabians (Nov 14, 2010)

horselovinguy said:


> All good points...
> However... because you don't agree with it does not mean it is wrong..
> You just admitted you have had some bad training put to you too...
> Not only does your horse have some pretty big holes, so do you if honest.


That's why I suggested she bring anything she doesn't agree with here and ask about it. It may not be wrong, may just sound/feel wrong based on her past experiences. 

OR, it could be a red flag about how things are done.

There's a place where I go to show that I will NEVER take a horse for training because I see the working student riding all the training horses. That in itself isn't a problem but the fact that she picks at them till they blow up is. When I said something one day when she was riding and having a "discussion" with the horse she was riding, someone said, "Watch and learn. You will see that with her, it's every horse, every day that she rides them.". Been to many shows at this facility and discovered over time that it was a very true statement. I've seen her wrestle with 3 year olds and BTDT horse, all the same. So, it's not the horse and I wouldn't allow her on one of my horses. That also tells me a bunch about the trainer at this facility. 

And I think 99.9999% of us have some big holes in our own training, that's why we're in training and trying to improve. I know that switching from Western Pleasure to Western Dressage has shown me where some of my holes are, in spades. I feel like I've gone back to Kindergarten, riding wise, and I'm actually loving it. I can see improvement every time I get on the horse.


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## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

I think from your wording of your post, you already know in your heart that this trainer will be a good one for you, and most certainly a HUGE improvement. Intuition is not to be discounted.


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## Saoirse (Jun 17, 2018)

I dont have a lot of experience with riding instructors, but what i look for in an instructor is: 

°how they ride

°have they learned in a remarcable place? (not the most important point, but its a plus)

°how are the riding lessons with him? (i try to attend at one lesson to a pupil,	at least for some minutes, see if I like and understand what he/she asks.

°has he/she ever showed? What were his/her resoults? (again not the most important point, but it helps) 

°do i get along with him/her? (i don't want a instructor i can not talk to freely or we argue about X things, I need someone to be kind, DEMANDING and sympathetic, who brings me "good humor" as well as knowledge. ) 

And the most important thing... Get a lesson from that instructor and see if we can work together.


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## Zeth (Sep 16, 2016)

As someone who just went through the process of finding a trainer, I could hee and haw at you all day long to find someone that rides well, what they did with their career, etc. And all of that is important - but it's also important to find someone:

- that you like - whether it's because they have a great personality and are a joy to learn from, or even if they don't have the best personality but they push you and your horse in the right way that works for everyone as a team. You're going to be happier and make more progress when you actually enjoy the lessons! 

- if they respect you - my trainer is always so kind and makes sure that I never feel like I'm asking stupid questions, or talks over me (even though she is much more experienced than I)

- how they treat the horse - especially someone with a young horse, you want to make sure they respect their mind and ability and realize that with (all horses, but especially) young ones, you might have the off day or a little bit of silliness. 

- they listen to your goals - not everyone wants to be an FEI rider, or even very competitive - my trainer is so great with understanding that I currently, due to school, don't have the time to be super competitive - but trains me in a way that is nothing less than her most competitive student.


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## thecolorcoal (Jan 28, 2015)

Thank you so much everyone for the replies. I have learned my lesson about becoming a client of a new, green trainer who does not really have the best business skills. She is a very good rider but i look forward to trying a different approach. There is more than one way to skin a cat as they say! 

I am hoping to find someone who can ride my horse and give me lessons, the same set-up I had before. First and foremost i want someone who is going to give my horse the respect she deserves and not be harsh to her. Unfortunately the more I reflect the more I realize the instruction I was given might not have been in either of our best interest. My horse went from very light and soft to heavy in the hand, pulling and tugging, and not wanting to go forward which required bigger and bigger spurs. Thrilled to get away from that training method.


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## Dreamcatcher Arabians (Nov 14, 2010)

thecolorcoal said:


> Thank you so much everyone for the replies. I have learned my lesson about becoming a client of a new, green trainer who does not really have the best business skills. She is a very good rider but i look forward to trying a different approach. There is more than one way to skin a cat as they say!
> 
> I am hoping to find someone who can ride my horse and give me lessons, the same set-up I had before. First and foremost i want someone who is going to give my horse the respect she deserves and not be harsh to her. Unfortunately the more I reflect the more I realize the instruction I was given might not have been in either of our best interest. My horse went from very light and soft to heavy in the hand, pulling and tugging, and not wanting to go forward which required bigger and bigger spurs. Thrilled to get away from that training method.


That was more of an "untraining" method.


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## thecolorcoal (Jan 28, 2015)

Dreamcatcher Arabians said:


> That was more of an "untraining" method.


i see this now. thank you! i want my soft horse back.


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## Dreamcatcher Arabians (Nov 14, 2010)

thecolorcoal said:


> i see this now. thank you! i want my soft horse back.


Soft is good! :smile:


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