# My Rant of Frustration >:(



## RideroftheWind (Jul 15, 2009)

Sorry people I don't know where else to vent so this is my little rant of frustration.:?

I ride english, and I've been riding for around 2 years now. I'm horse crazy, I love my barn, and I love the horses. Recently I started riding another horse. He's a great horse, but he can be hard to ride. Other people say I'm a good rider but I can tell my mistakes and I know I'm not. I don't need an instructor to tell me when I do something wrong because I notice every little mistake. It's just so hard to fix them. The horse I'm riding, like I said, he can be difficult, but it's not always his fault. I know it's usually my fault but everyone knows he's hard to ride and they don't see it and they just blame it on the horse. It makes me feel so bad. Usually I'm a decent rider, but lately I've been going through a really tough time with my riding. I go over jumps and notice my crap position. I swerve around corners because both me and the horse are aweful when it comes to cutting corners. And I'm constantly accidently clamping with my legs or pulling at the bit during jumps or doing other stuff to make him uncomfatorble. But he's such a forgiving horse and it makes me feel aweful because he shouldn't forgive me. It would be bad enough already to be a horse and have a metal bit shoved in your mouth, but if it's a bad rider...
I don't know what's wrong with me lately!!! I mean, there is absolutely no way I'd quit horseback riding, but lately I've been treating the horse awefully when I'm riding him. I don't mean to, but just little things like squeezing too hard or giving the wrong commands or pulling too hard are a pretty big deal. And don't say I'm being too hard on myself because I know it must be uncomfortable to have a bridle, saddle, and rider on you, but if the rider is making it worse it would be terrible.
And now I know that horses are truly the most amazing animals in the world to be able to put up with their riders, because if I were a horse I would've trampled them already!!!!!!!!

Anyways I'm not looking for advice, I'm just looking for a place to vent. But if you have any, I'd apreciate it. :?


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## MyBoyPuck (Mar 27, 2009)

Vent away! Get it all out and then turn your brain off! You're suffering from over-thinking syndrome.


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## Spyder (Jul 27, 2008)

RideroftheWind said:


> I don't need an instructor to tell me when I do something wrong because I notice every little mistake.


Sounds like to me that you do need a coach.


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## Iseul (Mar 8, 2010)

Spyder, I believe she meant that she knows she's not a great rider and she doesn't need a coach to tell her that.
I don't think she meant that she doesn't need a coach period, just that she knows she makes mistakes; which I view as a good thing, although coaches are a great thing to have when involved with horses.
I felt the same way when I came back from my first actual ride on Dude outside the arena...I was really hard on my hands (because he kept trying to bolt, and I couldn't effectivly spin him because there was 2+ feet of snow and he'd try yanking the reins from me) and then when he balked I would kick him and tap (it didn't look like tapping to everyone with me, but it really was) his neck with the reins because I could use them kind of like a crop in a way (they were split reins)
venting is good lol always. I'm starting another journal because things lately have just tossed le off the edge *facepalm* and what I get for letting the stuff get to me was jumping bareback before I calmed the horse more, and ended up on my back (thankfully I thought to twist so I didn't land on my should/head)....so vent all you can! XD
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## RideroftheWind (Jul 15, 2009)

Spyder said:


> Sounds like to me that you do need a coach.


 I have one. I take lessons. But since there are 3 other people in my lesson, she doesn't always notice everything. And my family doesn't have a lot of money so I can't have private lessons.

And like Isuel said... I don't need a coach to tell me my mistakes; I notice them myself. I used to be a good rider, but now I just seem to bee getting worse.


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## Alwaysbehind (Jul 10, 2009)

Changing horses can quickly show the holes in your abilities. So you are not getting worse you are just seeing what you do not really know. This is a good thing. 

And though group lessons are not always the bells and whistles that you want they are a good thing. Especially a group lesson that is that small. Take the time to listen as the instructor explains things to the other students so you can learn from their mistakes too.


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## welshies rule (Feb 7, 2010)

stop!! if this is your own horse may i suggest leaving off the schooling and jumping for a week or so?

go get your horse give him a good groom and either tack him up and go for a toddle or take him for a walk in hand?

i dont mean to be rude to u so i hope u wont take it that way, but.

this is meant to be fun and enjoyable... just relax and then pick up where u left off feeling refreshed x


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## Spyder (Jul 27, 2008)

RideroftheWind said:


> I have one. I take lessons. But since there are 3 other people in my lesson, she doesn't always notice everything. And my family doesn't have a lot of money so I can't have private lessons.
> 
> And like Isuel said... I don't need a coach to tell me my mistakes; I notice them myself. I used to be a good rider, but now I just seem to bee getting worse.


Great that you know your mistakes and great that you have an instructor but not great if you can't fix your mistakes.

Sometimes 1 private lesson is worth 10 group ones....and probable equal in cost.


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## Delfina (Feb 12, 2010)

An instructor is not necessarily to "point out mistakes", the instructor is there to tell you how to correct them so they don't continue happening until they are an ingrained habit which is very hard to correct.

Everything is connected, so problem A can't necessarily be corrected until problems X, Y and Z are which you may not even realize exist because you are focused on problem A but are obvious to an instructor watching you.


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## dantexeventer (Jul 11, 2009)

I agree with Spyder. Can you babysit, or mow lawns, or muck stalls to offset the cost of a few private lessons? 
When you're learning to ride (and heck, even if you've been riding 20 years!) there's always a period of 'plateau.' A lot of the time it occurs when you switch horses - if you ride one horse for a long time, you adjust to them, and they become easy. Horses are very different from one another, and a big part of the learning curve is learning to adjust to each one. You've only been riding for two years - this is normal! I suggest you pick up some books, some back issues of Practical Horseman - whatever, so you can learn while you're not at the barn and get more comfortable with the mechanics of riding.


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## koomy56 (Jan 19, 2008)

If you only notice and point out mistakes and negativity that's the only thing you will see. Start noticing what is going right, or better, or anything positive.


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## RideroftheWind (Jul 15, 2009)

welshies rule said:


> stop!! if this is your own horse may i suggest leaving off the schooling and jumping for a week or so?
> 
> go get your horse give him a good groom and either tack him up and go for a toddle or take him for a walk in hand?
> 
> ...


No way... :? I'm not stopping riding, even for a little while. Being at the barn with the horses and riding is what gets me through life a lot of times. Things are getting pretty tough for me right now, and thinking of horses and riding is often what gets me through the day.

Oh and by the way, it's not my horse.


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## RideroftheWind (Jul 15, 2009)

koomy56 said:


> If you only notice and point out mistakes and negativity that's the only thing you will see. Start noticing what is going right, or better, or anything positive.


If I don't notice my mistakes, how will I fix them? I do notice the things that are going right, but if I just ignored my mistakes and focus on the things that are going right, I will never learn.


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## shadowanne (Jan 7, 2010)

Perhaps you are focusing on too many mistakes at once. Maybe focusing on one area over a period of he will allow you to fix that mistake and create a new good habit. Then move on to the next. It might take a day, a week, or a month for each new area. Put the other mistakes on hold and work on the ones that are most useful right now. Avoid situations (cutting corners) that make more mistakes until you are ready to focus on that. Also you can let your trainer know the areas you are having issues, even in group lessons. Other riders might need those same areas addressed as well. Good Luck!


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## koomy56 (Jan 19, 2008)

I try not to look at anything in my riding as a mistake, but as something to look forward to exploring and trying to improve. It's all in your attitude and how you view it. Mistakes aren't something that should been seen as something negative, but as an opportunity for a new learning opportunity. Everything takes time. You fix one thing, and then there's something else, and so on. That's the whole fun of it!


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## horsequeen373 (Oct 4, 2009)

RideroftheWind said:


> If I don't notice my mistakes, how will I fix them? I do notice the things that are going right, but if I just ignored my mistakes and focus on the things that are going right, I will never learn.


There is a HUGE difference between noticing mistakes and obsessing over them. You need to find a balance between praising yourself for the things you did right and trying to fix what is wrong. If you completly ignore your mistakes and just focus on what your doing right then you'll get a big head and never fix your mistakes. But if you just focus on what your doing wrong (which seems to be what your doing, trust me I do this too, my trainer had to talk to me about it haha) then your going to be so hard on yourself that you start to get frustrated and that will prevent you from really doing anything to solve the mistakes. Plus it's just not healthy to be hard on yourself so much.
Everyone has times when they take a step back in their riding. This is probably true in other sports as well; you know how people alway say Michael Jordan got cut from his highschool basketball team? Well, do you think George Morris rode perfectly every ride since the first time he was in a saddle? No, like every other rider, he probably had rides that weren't pretty to watch.
It takes time to fix mistakes. I was doing a jumping clinic a few months ago and the person doing it said something along the lines of this (numbers and wording are probably off but you'll get my point) "It takes 24 hours of doing something to make it a habit. So if you think about how long it takes to go over a jump, how many jumps you do each lesson and how often you get to ride; it will take you many many rides and jumps to correct your hip angle (she was saying this to another girl who didn't bend enough at the hip)." 
My point to all of that is; don't get frustrated. Be patient and you will correct the mistakes. My trainer always asks us "Are you every aloud to give up?" and like robots me and the other riders always answer "No". So don't give up, your get it.


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## RideroftheWind (Jul 15, 2009)

horsequeen373 said:


> There is a HUGE difference between noticing mistakes and obsessing over them. You need to find a balance between praising yourself for the things you did right and trying to fix what is wrong. If you completly ignore your mistakes and just focus on what your doing right then you'll get a big head and never fix your mistakes. But if you just focus on what your doing wrong (which seems to be what your doing, trust me I do this too, my trainer had to talk to me about it haha) then your going to be so hard on yourself that you start to get frustrated and that will prevent you from really doing anything to solve the mistakes. Plus it's just not healthy to be hard on yourself so much.
> Everyone has times when they take a step back in their riding. This is probably true in other sports as well; you know how people alway say Michael Jordan got cut from his highschool basketball team? Well, do you think George Morris rode perfectly every ride since the first time he was in a saddle? No, like every other rider, he probably had rides that weren't pretty to watch.
> It takes time to fix mistakes. I was doing a jumping clinic a few months ago and the person doing it said something along the lines of this (numbers and wording are probably off but you'll get my point) "It takes 24 hours of doing something to make it a habit. So if you think about how long it takes to go over a jump, how many jumps you do each lesson and how often you get to ride; it will take you many many rides and jumps to correct your hip angle (she was saying this to another girl who didn't bend enough at the hip)."
> My point to all of that is; don't get frustrated. Be patient and you will correct the mistakes. My trainer always asks us "Are you every aloud to give up?" and like robots me and the other riders always answer "No". So don't give up, your get it.


Thanks a lot for that post.  It was helpful


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## Flagstaff Foxhunter (May 5, 2010)

You will eventually be a wonderful horseperson because you care so much. If it's any help, a lot of us riders will get in a slump and have some bad rides. But if you keep at it, you'll have a breakthrough one day, and all of a sudden your riding will improve a bunch. A lot of times when I have a bad day with one of my horses, I remind myself that often, the next ride I have will be the best one ever. It's also really great that you are riding more than one horse because that's the fastest way to become a better rider. Don't beat yourself up too much, just kick on!


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## corporate pride (Feb 23, 2010)

i agree. notice but don't obsess over your mistakes. it gets you down on everything else.
it sounds like your having a bad time with life in general. i find my mood effects my riding, so if i'm feeling like i'm stuffing up everywhere i usually stuff up everywhere.
you have only been riding 2 years.....you will make mistakes, just be sure you learn from them.
I make mistakes, i've been riding for 6 years.
changing horses does make a difference, my new horse is tall, bouncy, unbalanced, uneducated with a huge stride. my older horse ozzie is short, fat, lazy, flat movement, educated and balanced. i almost fell off marco first ride. private lessons do help alot!!! in 8 weeks of private lessons i learnt more then 2 years of pony club group lessons. my horse went from hollowing out his back to doing elevated extention trot! marco is learning to use his muscles and go on the bit so he's still learning but i tell you what, it's like day and night those two 
what people are trying to say is go on a trail ride, have fun, do something different to liven things up for both of you  remember to fart around and have fun every now and then


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## Rule of Reason (Feb 11, 2010)

RideroftheWind said:


> Usually I'm a decent rider, but lately I've been going through a really tough time with my riding. I go over jumps and notice my crap position. I swerve around corners because both me and the horse are aweful when it comes to cutting corners. And I'm constantly accidently clamping with my legs or pulling at the bit during jumps or doing other stuff to make him uncomfatorble. . . . I don't mean to, but just little things like squeezing too hard or giving the wrong commands or pulling too hard are a pretty big deal.


You are at a plateau. This will happen all through your riding life. You'll feel thrilled at how much you're improving, then frustrated when it seems to stop for a while. Or--gasp--go backward. What's happening is that you've understood a new concept mentally, but haven't taught your body how to do it yet. For the vast majority of us who aren't natural riders, this is the way it has to be. The brain comes first, then the body. The really tricky part is when you're partway there with your body, but haven't got the finishing touches yet. That's when you have to relax mentally and just blindly follow your instructor (hopefully your instructor is good enough so you can do that). 

If you're plateauing for more than, say, a month, it's time to get creative. Ask your instructor for ideas on a different way that you can learn this next step--but don't rely just on your instructor. Find books that deal with what you're having trouble with, and see if anything strikes a spark with you. The best riders often say that they spend time visualizing how to ride perfectly, down to the smallest detail. They also do things like take up yoga or tai chi to learn how to be relaxed and effective at the same time. 

Remember that you can improve a lot with work at the walk and trot. Riding bareback and/or without stirrups can help. Learning how to do some in-hand work can help you as well as the horse. Switching disciplines for a short time can help. Anything to give your body and brain more ways to learn.

Ignore the people who blame the horse or tell you to be satisfied with less. I agree with Flagstaff that you have a lot of potential. It shows in your humble attitude and your understanding of the horse's point of view. I suggest that you start a riding journal. After every ride, note down what you did and how things went. You'll soon be able to tell how you're progressing. It can be surprising to look back after a few months and see what you actually have accomplished!


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## RideroftheWind (Jul 15, 2009)

Woot woot! I had THE MOST amazing lesson today!!! Lucky listened like a little angel, we did the courses per-fect-ly, and even my instructor said I'm improving a lot! I think I'm back on track!


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## Rule of Reason (Feb 11, 2010)

Attagirl, see? The three P's -- patience, persistence, positive thoughts pay off. Keep it up!!


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## horsequeen373 (Oct 4, 2009)

Yay! I'm proud of you! Just keep working and you'll keep getting better


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## whcosta (Aug 13, 2015)

*Thank you!*

I am so glad to have read your post regardless of it being 1917 days old. I am 2 years riding and feeling this same exact way right now.


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## Corporal (Jul 29, 2010)

I'm glad that your last lesson was a success!!
Forasmuch as we ride the horse so that he/she takes over on "cruise control" most of the time, we need to ride the entire course. The best example I gave my students was to ride like you drive a car. You stay in your lane (track), you keep your foot on the accelerator (squeeze with your calves when necessary and keep contact) and adjust your speed (upward and lower transitions.) When you drive you have to keep feeding gas to the engine through a turn or you will not finish it. You keep your leg on your horse and drive into the turns and they will remain fluid.
You ride TO a jump like you drive up a hill, keeping your accelerator pushed, then releasing right before you crest the hill, so you do NOT interfere with the horse once he/she *commits to the jump.*
This is why you ALWAYS hear that you should Dressage your horse before you jump. It's all about transitions.
If you could practice, it should be laying out poles instead of jumps, and riding the course as many different ways as possible, including riding the partial course when you do not "jump" some of them. You should, at practice, work on your correct and perfectly straight approach, and ride the "pole course" at the walk, and the trot, and at the canter.
A good Hunter can jump a cross rail and small verticals from the walk, and certainly from the trot. YOU need to be aware of this, in case your instructor has had you jumping exclusively at the canter.
I've been repeating this all year, BUT, firm up your seat by walking cool every time without stirrups. It is, IMHO, the very _best_ time to work on developing a deep seat bc you are already tired and will NOT push yourself out of the saddle as you might at the beginning of a lesson. It will also teach you to loosen up your core and follow the motion of the horse, which is exaggerated at the walk. I also believe that this is the best way to prepare anybody to ride the canter the first time. As we know, MANY good Hunters and Jumpers have BIIIIIGGGGG trots and BIIIIIIIGGGG canters, like a ship at sea. (Of course, you will ask permission, if this is in a lesson on a school horse.)
When you are in 2-point correctly, you are really in a half seat, where you balance where you grip, and assist by sinking weight in your stirrups. Top notch Jumpers (riders) can drop their stirrups and jump a simple Hunter course and they will be in 2 point over the jumps.
Good luck and enjoy your lessons! I know that I did. =b


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## equitate (Dec 14, 2012)

There is a progression of learning: unconscious incompetence, conscious incompetence, conscious competence, and unconscious competence. 

So now you notices what is missing, you have to learn to prevent it from happening i the first place. Act BEFORE the problem. Learn how to pulse aids, to rebalance a horse. His REACTIONS are CAUSED by OUR ACTIONS. 99% of errors are ours, never the horses.

But to change, it's like eating an elephant. One bit at a time. It is NOT difficult to change, it is work to REPLACE a behavior. And is it NEVER the horse's fault, it simply part of learning. If you position o.f. is problematic, what are you going to do? Can you ride two point in all gaits w/o holding on? Post w/o stirrups? Do two point w/o stirrups? Are you working on getting your toes more forward? Have you do a LOT of caveletti to an X???

If you are swerving/cutting corners, ask why. Are you positioning before them, riding straight toward the horse and then using a proper rein effect.

Likely you are clamping with my legs or pulling at the bit during jumps, them imho work on improving your work on the flat with the above work. The good news it that you are now EDUCATED ENOUGH to NOTICE your ERRORS. A big step.

"I know that horses are truly the most amazing animals in the world to be able to put up with their riders, because if I were a horse I would've trampled them already!!!!!!!!" So true, at it occurs at even the top levels!


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## Rainaisabelle (Jan 2, 2015)

equitate said:


> There is a progression of learning: unconscious incompetence, conscious incompetence, conscious competence, and unconscious competence.
> 
> So now you notices what is missing, you have to learn to prevent it from happening i the first place. Act BEFORE the problem. Learn how to pulse aids, to rebalance a horse. His REACTIONS are CAUSED by OUR ACTIONS. 99% of errors are ours, never the horses.
> 
> ...





Corporal said:


> I'm glad that your last lesson was a success!!
> Forasmuch as we ride the horse so that he/she takes over on "cruise control" most of the time, we need to ride the entire course. The best example I gave my students was to ride like you drive a car. You stay in your lane (track), you keep your foot on the accelerator (squeeze with your calves when necessary and keep contact) and adjust your speed (upward and lower transitions.) When you drive you have to keep feeding gas to the engine through a turn or you will not finish it. You keep your leg on your horse and drive into the turns and they will remain fluid.
> You ride TO a jump like you drive up a hill, keeping your accelerator pushed, then releasing right before you crest the hill, so you do NOT interfere with the horse once he/she *commits to the jump.*
> This is why you ALWAYS hear that you should Dressage your horse before you jump. It's all about transitions.
> ...


Not sure if you're aware but this post is from 2010 but good advice I learnt something


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