# That's it!



## Skyseternalangel (Jul 23, 2011)

For her, ignorance is not bliss as she is going to really hurt people without meaning to.

But I am happy that you are looking to become even more fit than you are now  It takes a lot of fitness (more than people think) to ride a horse well!


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## Daisy25 (May 29, 2011)

Ugh! How rude!

I figured you meant you were done with advertising for leasers because there were problems with THEM...

My advice for getting more fit would be to find a good program that you could commit to and that will offer you moral support. Depending on your personality - that might mean you join a gym and take some classes or sign up for an online weightloss program.

Meanwhile - did you actually lease to this woman or did you tell her to take a hike?


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## Back2Horseback (Mar 21, 2012)

OMG! You DO realize that there is NOTHING WRONG with you and SO MUCH WRONG with that "person" whom you had the misfortune to run into that I cannot even go into it here...She clearly needs a good lesson in manners. *And the *NERVE*!!* SHE WANTED* to lease *YOUR HORSE*!!:evil:

Please, *please* tell us you did NOT lease to that horrid person? :?

As for diet and exercise, there are about a million variations on the basic methods which WORK long-term, but honestly, calories in > than calories out! Basic math...In general...start just "thinking" about small changes...baby steps you know? Make the most healthful choices for foods compared to whatever you already eat (even if you have a REALLY healthy diet NOW, just make changes to SLIGHTLY SMALLER portions of the same healthful, beneficial foods)--cut out the empty calories and look toward mainly non-processed foods; eat things that cause naturally larger amounts of, um, "stool" on a very regular basis...OH! Not depriving yourself is super important, (don't go NUTS and think "I am on a DIET!! I MUST ONLY EAT PERFECTLY OR I HAVE FAILED!!)<---won't work for more than a few days to a month if you try an "all or nothing" attitude rather than an all over lifestyle change, and you CAN'T FAIL if you look at the whole process as simply generally getting MORE healthy (even if you already ARE healthy!), it's win/win!! :lol:

Just be smart and thoughtful about what you put in your mouth...Remember...move, move, move! It's tougher _in a way_ for you than someone who is more sedentary, as I bet cardiovascularly you are super-fit, (if you can ride well and often enough to properly care for a horse you OWN; even if you are riding a bit less lately, you are likely in very good shape heart/lung-wise, even if you are heavier than you feel you should be) so when you exercise, you'll have to push your body a bit harder than those who are not fit to begin with because for some forms of fat/calorie burning you need to get your heart rate up to a certain level...if you are already fit, the heart can take much more activity w/o elevating in rate much...you will always have positive results from exercise for your body regardless, but in order to burn the MOST calories and/or fat, it can take higher levels of activity...

I have_ tons of tips_ (my husband is, like, Mr. Physical Fitness/holistic health and natural foods GURU!--try living with THAT for a bit! ha! :shock, and I am more than happy to share them if you like...I applaud you for wanting to be the fittest you can be, (I know _I work towards that_ continuously...one can always do better in _every_ area, right?) but, considering what happened, _be sure it is YOU who is unhappy with how you look/feel and such, and not some SNOBBY, rude joke of a person_! 

NOBODY has the right to cause another person to feel badly about themselves...NOBODY!:evil: Major cyber hugs to you!!!!


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## Back2Horseback (Mar 21, 2012)

Just looked at my post...duh...I must've been more than half asleep!! What I MEANT YOU SAY WAS: CALORIES IN < CALORIES OUT (less than, NOT GREATER THAN)....major apologies for incorrect info and looking like a total dork brain!:0)


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## la volpe (Jun 19, 2012)

Ugh. Her comment just disgusts me. I cannot believe some people.
It's unfortunate that she said that to you, but good for you for starting the weight loss! It's such an awesome feeling when you shed the pounds! You're going to do awesome c:

I'm not good with weight loss on my own. I always cheat and then give up pretty quickly. As I've mentioned before in other threads, I'm on Jenny Craig and it's made a HUGE difference in my weight. I love the support the girls give me and it's really simple. I don't have to change much, but it really has motivated me to start working out more [whereas on my own I'd avoid it at all costs]. If you find doing this on your own too difficult, I'd recommend trying a weight loss program or getting a friend or family member to help you out and offer support c:


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## uflrh9y (Jun 29, 2012)

First off ((BIG HUGS))!!!!! Putting aside this woman being a total @#%*&, she obviously doesn't know about horses. That to me is enough for you to not take a word of her's with any more then a grain of salt. So why listen to her about anything?

If you are ready to lose weight and get healthy, please do it for yourself and not because some witch with a big mouth and a small brain made you. You will be doomed to fail and feel even worse about yourself. I started Weight Watchers last April, not because I felt bad about myself (which is when I usually started diets in the past and surprise surprise they all failed!) but because I was feeling good. I was ready to get healthy and ready to put me first, and it has worked. I also realized that weight loss is not a steady thing. You will lose weight and you will gain some, along the way. I had to find ways to get over the feeling of depression whenever I had a gain because that is usually when I would just give up. 

Last but not least, we didn't gain this weight in one week. one month. one year. So how can we expect it to come off in that amount of time? 

If you don;t want to do a program, then just start by writing down everything you eat and by making small changes, but not all at once. 

Has there ever been a weight loss thread on HF? Maybe we could start one and check in with each other each day (or each week)? I know I am in!

Oh, and if you ended up leasing your horse to that smegma of a woman, I will walk to Ontario and beat you with a dressage whip!  lol What you weight is one small part of the thousands of things that make up the wonderful person you are. Don't let some vile abscess make you feel like it is *all* you are.


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## ChristineNJ (Jan 23, 2010)

Yikes, don't know what to say about this except that some stables have a weight limit and do not let riders ride their horses if they are above the weight limit....I don't know how much you weight or how big your horse is...not enough information here to comment on the person that wanted to lease your horse.


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## Puddintat (Jul 24, 2010)

How rude!! If you want to lose weight for YOU, that's great and I wish you the best of luck. However, losing weight because of others is not a great reason and in the end it probably won't work. I'm in the same boat. :???:

I sure hope you told that lady to take a hike.


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## Randella (Dec 13, 2011)

Skyseternalangel said:


> For her, ignorance is not bliss as she is going to really hurt people without meaning to.
> 
> But I am happy that you are looking to become even more fit than you are now  It takes a lot of fitness (more than people think) to ride a horse well!


Thank you, and goodness knows it takes fitness, I just about died today in the saddle, sitting at nearly 40C here! I literally melted out of the saddle at the end!


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## Randella (Dec 13, 2011)

Daisy25 said:


> Ugh! How rude!
> 
> I figured you meant you were done with advertising for leasers because there were problems with THEM...
> 
> ...



Nope, I didn't. She actually called me a couple days ago to ask if she could lease him, I simply told her that I was "unable to find someone that would fit both me and my horse."

And I'm currently in the process of trying Weight Watchers


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## Randella (Dec 13, 2011)

Back2Horseback said:


> OMG! You DO realize that there is NOTHING WRONG with you and SO MUCH WRONG with that "person" whom you had the misfortune to run into that I cannot even go into it here...She clearly needs a good lesson in manners. *And the *NERVE*!!* SHE WANTED* to lease *YOUR HORSE*!!:evil:
> 
> Please, *please* tell us you did NOT lease to that horrid person? :?
> 
> ...



Thank you so much for the support!  Makes me feel loads better. And no, I didn't lease to her, I've received a few phone calls from her though, asking to lease him. I just giggle softly to myself when her name comes up on my phone


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## Randella (Dec 13, 2011)

la volpe said:


> Ugh. Her comment just disgusts me. I cannot believe some people.
> It's unfortunate that she said that to you, but good for you for starting the weight loss! It's such an awesome feeling when you shed the pounds! You're going to do awesome c:
> 
> I'm not good with weight loss on my own. I always cheat and then give up pretty quickly. As I've mentioned before in other threads, I'm on Jenny Craig and it's made a HUGE difference in my weight. I love the support the girls give me and it's really simple. I don't have to change much, but it really has motivated me to start working out more [whereas on my own I'd avoid it at all costs]. If you find doing this on your own too difficult, I'd recommend trying a weight loss program or getting a friend or family member to help you out and offer support c:


Thanks! I've actually joined Weight Watchers since, and its really helpful. Everyone's really supportive, and like you said, the program really motivates me!


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## Randella (Dec 13, 2011)

uflrh9y said:


> First off ((BIG HUGS))!!!!! Putting aside this woman being a total @#%*&, she obviously doesn't know about horses. That to me is enough for you to not take a word of her's with any more then a grain of salt. So why listen to her about anything?
> 
> If you are ready to lose weight and get healthy, please do it for yourself and not because some witch with a big mouth and a small brain made you. You will be doomed to fail and feel even worse about yourself. I started Weight Watchers last April, not because I felt bad about myself (which is when I usually started diets in the past and surprise surprise they all failed!) but because I was feeling good. I was ready to get healthy and ready to put me first, and it has worked. I also realized that weight loss is not a steady thing. You will lose weight and you will gain some, along the way. I had to find ways to get over the feeling of depression whenever I had a gain because that is usually when I would just give up.
> 
> ...



THANK YOU! Your comment made me so hopeful, and so supported!  I didn't lease to her, she continues to bother me to allow her to lease though! Heheh, and I feel like that's a win on my end ;P

I've joined Weight Watchers, but I'm totally down for the thread on here, that'd be a great help! 

Thanks so much for your support, it means so much to me


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## Randella (Dec 13, 2011)

ChristineNJ said:


> Yikes, don't know what to say about this except that some stables have a weight limit and do not let riders ride their horses if they are above the weight limit....I don't know how much you weight or how big your horse is...not enough information here to comment on the person that wanted to lease your horse.


Yes, I realize some barns have weight limits, but this is MY personal horse. I've owned him for 4 years, and he's never, ever had an issue. He's a big, burly dude who can pack around people much larger than I. 

She was commenting on MY weight, and I found it extremely offensive. One reason being, she was coming into a place that's my territory, and wanting me to allow her to use something very precious of mine; and yet she insulted me. I feel that's unacceptable.


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## Randella (Dec 13, 2011)

Puddintat said:


> How rude!! If you want to lose weight for YOU, that's great and I wish you the best of luck. However, losing weight because of others is not a great reason and in the end it probably won't work. I'm in the same boat. :???:
> 
> I sure hope you told that lady to take a hike.


She is definitely not leasing my horse! lol. And I feel that she was the last straw for me to realise something needed to be done. I'm making healthier decisions that will not only positively effect me, but my horse also 

Thanks for the support  I really appreciate it!


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## uflrh9y (Jun 29, 2012)

Randella said:


> THANK YOU! Your comment made me so hopeful, and so supported!  I didn't lease to her, she continues to bother me to allow her to lease though! Heheh, and I feel like that's a win on my end ;P
> 
> I've joined Weight Watchers, but I'm totally down for the thread on here, that'd be a great help!
> 
> Thanks so much for your support, it means so much to me


Yay, awesome! Did you join WW online or the meetings? I do the online and they have a message board there, too that is very helpful. I don't think you have to be an online member to join and post on the message board, though. 

But I think a forum for weight loss here would be awesome cause we are all horse people. I'm kind of new to this forum, but I will start it. Do I have to ask admin first? The more people you have in your corner and the more people you are accountable to, the better.

ETA: I noticed that there is a Riders Weight Loss Support thread already, should we just post on that or start a new one?


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## Golden Horse (Feb 20, 2010)

Remember while you on your weight loss journey that you are doing it for you because you deserve it. The witch may have been the kick start, but to keep it going turn your thoughts into positive ones. 

Just think in a little while you'll be thinner and she'll still be a *****


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## waresbear (Jun 18, 2011)

Golden Horse said:


> Remember while you on your weight loss journey that you are doing it for you because you deserve it. The witch may have been the kick start, but to keep it going turn your thoughts into positive ones.
> 
> Just think in a little while you'll be thinner and she'll still be a *****


LOL!!!! So true!!! OP, good on for joining a weight loss program! In future when someone makes a derogatory comment
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Skyseternalangel (Jul 23, 2011)

Golden Horse said:


> Remember while you on your weight loss journey that you are doing it for you because you deserve it. The witch may have been the kick start, but to keep it going turn your thoughts into positive ones.
> 
> Just think in a little while you'll be thinner and she'll still be a *****


Ehh.. I agree with the first part but calling her a ***** helps nobody. Some people truly worry about horses and don't take into account other's feelings. I'm sure she didn't mean to offend and she's probably confused as to why you aren't considering her for the lease.

Someone people truly are ignorant of how their words affect others and are blinded by what they feel is truth. I used to think ALL people using a whip while lunging was cruel so I would be mad at those that did it (cause I'd seen a few people at shows smack their horse with it without really having a reason to??) But anyway I learned that the whip is a tool not a weapon and things began to make sense. 

Now if I went up to those using whips while lunging, I would have ****ed off a LOT of people and I would have been the *****. It's just I was ignorant and didn't realize it.

Ya know? She'll realize one day that what she says about horses jumping and riders that seem heavy to her is untrue. 

Sometimes the best thing to do is be straight up honest, which it's your choice (the OP) if you want to be. I wouldn't have been quiet when she said that to me I would have aid "you know, I've had my vet tell me tha my horse is in prime physical condition and can support me just fine. So what you said was not only hurtful but untrue" 

But that's just me. I like to help people in various ways. 

But thought I would contribute my thoughts. There are too many angry people in this world when it could be fixed or at least confirmed (as in agree to disagree) with simple communication.

~~~

That being said, like I said I am very happy that you are working on bettering your health  That's awesome, and I'm all for it! Sometimes we need the right kind of motivation. I didn't consider I could get healthier (aka asthma and weight) until I found a reason to: horses.

Hugs!


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## waresbear (Jun 18, 2011)

*sorry on iPod, can't work the stupid thing! Tell rude peops like that while you appreciate her being concerned for the horse's well being, she needn't worry her stupid brain about it, horse's are strong animals. And if she phones you again, tell I said she is rude & ignorant, in fact give her my phone number so I can tell her myself!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Randella (Dec 13, 2011)

Golden Horse said:


> Remember while you on your weight loss journey that you are doing it for you because you deserve it. The witch may have been the kick start, but to keep it going turn your thoughts into positive ones.
> 
> Just think in a little while you'll be thinner and she'll still be a *****


Ahaha, my thoughts exactly! That's what's motivating me to keep going


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## Randella (Dec 13, 2011)

waresbear said:


> *sorry on iPod, can't work the stupid thing! Tell rude peops like that while you appreciate her being concerned for the horse's well being, she needn't worry her stupid brain about it, horse's are strong animals. And if she phones you again, tell I said she is rude & ignorant, in fact give her my phone number so I can tell her myself!
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


Ahaha, that's funny! And if she does, I'll certainly pass her along! 

Funny thing is, her **** didn't seem too much smaller than mine, the silly cow.


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## Randella (Dec 13, 2011)

Skyseternalangel said:


> Ehh.. I agree with the first part but calling her a ***** helps nobody. Some people truly worry about horses and don't take into account other's feelings. I'm sure she didn't mean to offend and she's probably confused as to why you aren't considering her for the lease.
> 
> Someone people truly are ignorant of how their words affect others and are blinded by what they feel is truth. I used to think ALL people using a whip while lunging was cruel so I would be mad at those that did it (cause I'd seen a few people at shows smack their horse with it without really having a reason to??) But anyway I learned that the whip is a tool not a weapon and things began to make sense.
> 
> ...


I told her I didn't feel the correct fit between her and us, but I get where you're coming from. I also didn't say anything at the time, because I was so utterly dumbfounded that she actually said it, that's all. 

I appreciate the support too  !


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## Skyseternalangel (Jul 23, 2011)

Randella said:


> I told her I didn't feel the correct fit between her and us, but I get where you're coming from. I also didn't say anything at the time, because I was so utterly dumbfounded that she actually said it, that's all.
> 
> I appreciate the support too  !


Yep we're here cheering you on!!

And it's all good. Nothing wrong with what you did so I hope you don't feel I was scolding you or anything like that.


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## Golden Horse (Feb 20, 2010)

But I feel scolded here, the point of the lady dog comment was to point out that the Op can change and probably a lot easier the the lady dog.

But Hey, feel free to jump on me anytime, seems everyone else is just now.


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## Skyseternalangel (Jul 23, 2011)

Golden Horse said:


> But I feel scolded here, the point of the lady dog comment was to point out that the Op can change and probably a lot easier the the lady dog.
> 
> But Hey, feel free to jump on me anytime, seems everyone else is just now.


Noo you aren't being scolded! Just because I do things differently doesn't mean you're wrong 

She was a *****.. but what I'm saying is I think her purpose wasn't to hurt the OP but she was concerned about the horse (without reason to be.. hence where the ignorance comes in)

I'm sorry Golden that you felt I was scolding you :/ Not my intention at all!!!!!

I love what you have to say, you give it up straight


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## TimberRidgeRanch (Mar 6, 2012)

RAND first I am sorry that someone can be so cruel but their out there. I too am heavy set and get quite upset at some peoples stupid remarks.

I got a ??? Have you checked out www.sparkpeople.com yet? OMG i so love it been on it for about a month it helps you track everything when losing weight or just want to be healthier. I lost 20 lbs so far and they have great chatrooms and forums you got to check it out!
and good for you girl! Lose the weight for you but use the rude behavior of others as a motivation. I wish you luck and if you ever need to talk PM me Im here. 

TRR


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## Golden Horse (Feb 20, 2010)

Skyseternalangel said:


> I'm sorry Golden that you felt I was scolding you :/ Not my intention at all!!!!!


Thanks Sky, think I maybe just a little touchy at the moment, all is good


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## la volpe (Jun 19, 2012)

Randella said:


> Thanks! I've actually joined Weight Watchers since, and its really helpful. Everyone's really supportive, and like you said, the program really motivates me!


That's awesome! Good luck!


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## maura (Nov 21, 2009)

The problem isn't the women's resemblance to a female dog, it was her utter lack of boundaries, social propriety and respect for other's property. 

The proper response to that is not to excuse the behavior on basis of ignorance. I suspect that if a guest in your home started offering random advice on your clothes, makeup and home decor while exclaiming that it's a shame that bad taste is so prevelent, no one would suggest you excuse her behavior. 

Somehow in our current "nanny" culture, if it somehow touches on other's health, it's society's problem and therefore normal social boundaries don't apply. 

Bull. Weight and appearance are deeply personal issues, strict social boundaries should apply even more when discussing them. That woman was so far off base that she can't see the base from where she's standing. 

To to OP, I am sure you were too taken aback to say anything, but I kind of wish you had let her know how inappropriate and offensive her comments were, because I suspect until someone does, she'll continue to offend, beleiving monitoring other's weight and suitability to their horses is legimately her concern. 

In any case, good luck on your fitness journey and keep us posted on your progress!


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## LoveHipHop (Mar 27, 2012)

Poor you, don't take any notice of her, this is YOUR horse and how much you weight or what you do with your horse is none of her business.
Good on you for trying out a diet, but only change if YOU want to; not just because of what she's said.
Oh.. and I suggest you say no to her leasing your horse haha! 
Best of luck!


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## Saskia (Aug 26, 2009)

While that woman wasn't the nicest of people, I think that if she's helping motivate you to do what you want to do it's not such a bad experience. 

Good luck and keep us posted!


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## afatgirlafathorse (Feb 21, 2012)

Do not allow yourself to be motivated by this woman. Be motivated by yourself, by your love and acceptance of yourself and your desire to do the right things for yourself. Much more success and a positive journey is brought about that way. 

I do hope if she does contact you again, you tell her that her behaviour was not appropriate. Ignorant or not, she needs to know that what she said was not helpful or kind or even necessarily TRUE.


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## Palomine (Oct 30, 2010)

8 Things That Are Making You Fat | Reader's Digest

This was on FB wall when went there...and makes a lot of sense. Maybe it will help.

I too am having trouble eating right. I get the exercise at barn but still drink Cokes and while I don't eat tons? Obviously I'm still getting too many calories, as it is not coming off.

So, since you've decided to do something about your weight, I will try harder on mine too.

And while several have said the woman was out of line? It may be that she really looked at OP honestly too and said what OP needed to hear.

It is very easy for us to look in the mirror and say "well, I'm not THAT fat". I see it all the time...and do it some to my image in the mirror too.

Problem is? Yes, I am THAT FAT! I'm 5'6" or so, and weigh 212. That puts me in size 20 jeans/XL or 2X shirts...and I am way too fat period.

Thank you for posting this thread, and for having the guts to do something about your weight, and mine now.

I'd rather a person be honest, than to tell me "oh, you look okay" when deep down? I know I don't.


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## Randella (Dec 13, 2011)

I realize that I'm a bigger rider, however I didn't need some strange woman coming into my barn, telling me that despite all the precautions I take to ensure that my horse is as comfortable and happy as possible (and trust me, he's no skinny minnie either), so that riding him will cause him no physical strain - that I'm just too fat to ride him. 

And hey, you know what, I am fat, and I know that. I'm doing something about it. But what if it had been a medical condition? What if I had already lost 100lbs, and was continuing on my weight loss journey, and this was the first time I'd been able to ride a horse in years?

I don't care if I was the size of an elephant, she saw how perfectly healthy the horse is, how easily he accepted my weight on his back, and the fact that he was not burdened by me in any way. 

Bottom line, it was disrespectful. She cannot come into my peaceful area of zen, and say things like that to me, expecting to gain use of something that is very near and dear to my heart. She was out of line, it is not acceptable to comment on anyone's weight.


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## Back2Horseback (Mar 21, 2012)

_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## afatgirlafathorse (Feb 21, 2012)

Palomine said:


> 8 Things That Are Making You Fat | Reader's Digest
> 
> This was on FB wall when went there...and makes a lot of sense. Maybe it will help.
> 
> ...


By whose standards do you not "look okay"? Whether someone's appearance is aesthetically pleasing or not depends on the beholder, so you really can't base your motivation off of that.

I don't think anybody's opinion of if I "look good" or not should have any bearing on my life. If I choose to wear a bikini to the beach at 250lbs, that is entirely MY business, regardless of if it is aesthetically pleasing to somebody else. I am more than the body that I exist in.

My motivation for weight loss is completely fitness related. I want to be able to ride my mare and not have to give up because of my fitness deficiencies before she is ready to be done being ridden.


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## skittlesfirehawk (Mar 5, 2011)

I'm on ww's now and its really about making a lifestyle change I'm starting eat healthy on my own and its super easy to follow and after you hit goal weight you no longer have to pay but can still attend meetings


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