# Help Find my old horse :(



## Legend (Nov 15, 2011)

Honestly, finding her will be a nightmare... You should get a hold of her 2nd owner (not including you). But why did you sell her in the first place?


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## LilTuffGirl (Nov 14, 2011)

I've been talking to the woman I sold her to. She's very upset about it and is trying to locate her as well but the woman she sold her too isn't answering her.

We had to sell her because I went into the police academy which wasn't something I was paid during. I couldn't afford her $350 a month board. COuldn't find a barn cheaper either.


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## Legend (Nov 15, 2011)

LilTuffGirl said:


> I've been talking to the woman I sold her to. She's very upset about it and is trying to locate her as well but the woman she sold her too isn't answering her.
> 
> We had to sell her because I went into the police academy which wasn't something I was paid during. I couldn't afford her $350 a month board. COuldn't find a barn cheaper either.


Oh.. sorry ): Could you go to the woman's house to contact her?


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## Speed Racer (Oct 21, 2009)

Legend said:


> Oh.. sorry ): Could you go to the woman's house to contact her?


*Bad *idea. You don't just randomly show up at someone's house because they're not returning phone calls or e-mails. That's a good way to get yourself shot, or the police called on you for trespassing.

OP, you said she's a registered half Arabian? Contact AHA and ask who's currently registered as the owner on her paperwork. That will at least give you a starting point. However, if the horse's current owner doesn't want to correspond with you, you're done. Harassing her for information is wrong. As a police officer you're aware of this.


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## Hunter65 (Aug 19, 2009)

I just posted this story. Don't give up hope.

Woman reunites with long-lost horse 11 years later | CTV British Columbia | CTV News


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## LilTuffGirl (Nov 14, 2011)

yea I wouldn't show up at the house or anything. Expecially considering i'm in WV and the new owners are in NC.. Possibly Winston-Salem area. 

I'll call AHA see if I can find anything out.


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## LilTuffGirl (Nov 14, 2011)

Apparently she's still registered to the woman I sold her to but I was able to call the woman she gave her to. She is suppose to call me back with contact info for the man she sold Honey to.. but.. haven't heard anything back 

All I know is that she is on a massive farm in Lexington, NC...



















I haven't given up yet.. not sure I will? She means A LOT to me.. like.. seriously..


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## Baylen Jaxs (Jun 25, 2011)

LilTuffGirl said:


> Apparently she's still registered to the woman I sold her to but I was able to call the woman she gave her to. She is suppose to call me back with contact info for the man she sold Honey to.. but.. haven't heard anything back
> 
> All I know is that she is on a massive farm in Lexington, NC...
> 
> ...



Don't give up! I am in the process of looking for old adds and what not....Trying to find something. Is her other half quarter horse??


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## LilTuffGirl (Nov 14, 2011)

Yup - cremello stallion from NC as well. I wish I had put her info on allbreed when I had it...


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## Skyseternalangel (Jul 23, 2011)

Any luck??


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## Baylen Jaxs (Jun 25, 2011)

LilTuffGirl said:


> Yup - cremello stallion from NC as well. I wish I had put her info on allbreed when I had it...



Whats her registered name??


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

People like the OP can be a horse owner's nightmare. Think of it from the other person's standpoint.

We bought Epona from a man who basically abandoned her at the farm she was boarded at due to financial problems.

Did he regret having to sell her? YES 

Was there a clause in the contract that should we sell her he is to be given first rights of purchase? Yes 

Did he contact the BO later when his financial situation improved to say he was willing to buy her back? yes 

Did he contact us? NO

Would I have wanted him to contact us to ask to buy her or to ask how she is doing? NO 

Would I want him to show up at the barn to see her or my house to talk to us about her? NO

would I want him to telephone me? NO 

Would I view this as harrassment? YES 

WHY would this behavior concern me? Because she is now MY horse, and the previous owner sold her, whatever the reasons, and we would feel uncomfortable with him suddenly taking an interest on her whereabouts and well being.....i.e. it would feel like he was stalking her.

People do stalk horses, believe it or not. Beau was moved from his ex barn to a secluded private farm faaaarrrr up in the mountains because, like a movie star, he has a REAL LIFE stalker after him. We moved him for a number of reasons, one of which was the very real threat that this stalker would try to steal him. The police were even involved. We were considering having him chipped, but this is useless if he were sold to a private party, or if the auction house he ended up in did not have the equipment to scan for the chip.....

so.....Beau is in hiding! Like someone in the witness protection program!!

What a sad world it is when you have to hide your horse from a stalker:-(

As for Epona, her owner never contacted us, only our ex BO.....and with what we are dealing with in regards to Beau, I am glad he DID NOT>


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

I urge the OP to use caution in this matter.

*Seller's regret can quickly turn into an annoyance and can seem to the current owner as harassment or worse, a threat*.

To clarify: Beau's stalker was not a previous owner. rather she is a woman who tried to buy him out from under us, offering his owner full purchase price NOW, whereas we had to wait two weeks to come up with it. The owner refused to sell him to her since he had already promised to sell him to us. She had a mental meltdown and cursed at him and became vile. and she showed up one day at our NOW ex barn asking to see him and asking questions about him. She told the Bo she had our permission to do so...which was not true. The threat of her stealing him was like a dark cloud hanging over our heads. The police were even involved..... for that and other reasons, we moved Beau far away to a secluded private farm in the mountains. He is officially in hiding. Like someone in the witness protection program. It sounds funny but it isn't. Because everyone in our local horse community know each other, we can never tell anyone where exactly he is now living due to the possibilility they could unknowingly tell the stalker woman. Our farrier and our vet are from out of state to lessen the possibility of them inadvertently telling someone who may know her. Our ex BO is no longer in business and is sworn to secrecy ....as are the only two boarders who boarded there who know where Beau is. It is difficult to live under s uch circumstances. And having him chipped is not the answer as it would only work if the auction house she would take him to after stealing him had the equipment or protocol to scan for the chip. If she were to sell him at a private deal or to someone she knows, the chip is useless.



SO, in summation: if Epona's owner had continued to try to contact us or the ex BO, we would not have appreciated it. It would have made us feel uneasy and as if she were being stalked. And angry. 

*Epona was sold, whatever the reason, and her ex owner needs to learn to live with the fact that selling a horse sometimes comes with regret later...and worry....and doubt. That does NOT give you the seller the right to contact the current owners or otherwise intrude upon their lives. PERIOD*

Just my opinion, from the standpoint of a woman who has a horse with a stalker and who is in "hiding" and as a woman who has a horse whose seller later regretted selling her. 

Just something for the OP to think about


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## Cacowgirl (Feb 19, 2011)

Well, a sticky situation. I had to sell a horse,quickly & took a Very Big loss on it, but then the horse went to a working ranch, which was what he needed, & he became their "darling" go-to horse. It's been a few years, but I still like to hear how he's doing. ( He went through a dealer who is a friend of my neighbor's.) If I could I would send an email to ask about him, but I would never bother them beyond that, as I'm just happy he has a good home & they appreciate him. I'm extremely happy w/the horses I have now-1 I researched through his papers & found a dear person from my past that was a previous owner & she came & saw ( & rode ) him once, & is so happy that he has a great home & is being used. On my mare I researched her papers, found her previous owner & told her I had the horse & loved her & that was it. Very few people in my experience care once a horse is gone. I like to hear that my horses are doing well, but I don't get in their business. & I like to know what my horses were like before I had them.But, ultimaltely, it's the present that matters. Good Luck on your hunt-keep us posted.


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

Cacowgirl said:


> I like to hear that my horses are doing well, but I don't get in their business.


Exactly! Because while the OP is concerned and just wants to be reassured her ex horse is ok, to the current owner that can come across as harassment or as a threat. Because of what we have endured due to Beau's stalker, we would be totally gun shy about a previous owner asking questions in the horse community about our horse, and certainly would feel uneasy about them contacting us personally. So I advise the OP to really think this situation through and to try to see things from the current owner's perspective..... and to realize that* sometimes* people just don't want previous owners intruding into their lives....for whatever reason


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## Cacowgirl (Feb 19, 2011)

So sorry to hear that you had such an unpleasant experience. Luckily, not all people are going to be like that. Most of my horses I keep until they die of old age, so it's not a major issue w/me,the ones I've got now are 19 & 20, & I have every intention of being their last owner. But if I exit before they do, my husband knows what I want for them as will any of my new horse friends.


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

Not sure if you are referring to me or the OP, but Unpleasant is the word for both experiences!:-( We have to "hide" our horse.... We have to be very careful who we tell where he is, and if horse acquaintances ask where we moved him to, we have to either be vague as in "at a private farm" or point them in the wrong direction by saying "near __________ town", when they are actually nowhere near that town.

We were very happy that Epona's ex owner did not harass us or contact us directly.....he just mentioned it to our ex BO that if we wanted to sell her, he would buy her back. We told the BO that we were quite happy with her and would keep her till the good Lord takes one or both of us....and that was the end of that.

I have NO idea what is going on inside Beau's stalker's head since she was not a previous owner. Guess she's just a fruitcake! There's plenty of gray OTTBs in this world, don't know why she's fixated on this one in particular.:? 

But then again, even our ex BO suffered from Beau insanity. Despite having been a client of hers for over five years and considering ourselves friends of her and her family, Beau came between us. She is a dressage competitor and eventer....when Beau came to her barn, she became obsessed with him. She wanted to buy him from us or trade him for one of her TBs...when I politely and in a friendly manner refused, she took it well...at first. But then she asked to train him and ride him in shows. Again, we politely refused.....and things got progressively sour. It ended up with us barely civil to each other and her asking us to leave. We communicate rarely via email, though she asked me for a favor recently and I happily obliged her....we still do not talk much or associate. And to be honest, I often miss her..... She asked us to leave 5 times, and each time we tried to patch things up, but Beau came between us. The end came when she said, if you sell that horse, you can stay. I had to choose between her or the horse. I chose the horse. 

so....us horse people feel passionately about our horse's care and well being, even after we are forced to sell them...I understand that. I also understand that these feelings can cause rifts between friends, make enemies out of strangers and cause legal problems. That is why I think the OP should really think about stepping back now or CERTAINLY if she does manage to find and contact these people ONCE ONLY.....for the benefit of herself, the horse and the current owners. Unless of course, they welcome your concern and your continuing communication with them. They may .... or may not. So, test the waters, but be prepared to back off if they do not appreciate your concern for their horse.


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## Jessabel (Mar 19, 2009)

It depends on what the former owner is like. If she's a good, reasonable person, I would have no problem keeping her posted and sending her pictures. I would want the same. Selling a horse and not knowing what happened to it would be my worst nightmare. Now, it would be a different story if the old owner was a nutcase.

In fact, if the new owner refused to talk to me or even just send pictures, I'd being going into panic mode. That's why I don't sell. :-( Because anything can happen.

OP- I hope you find your girl and she's doing well.


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

*us horse people feel passionately about our horse's care and well being, even after we are forced to sell them...I understand that. I also understand that these feelings can cause rifts between friends, make enemies out of strangers and cause legal problems. That is why I think the OP should really think about stepping back now or CERTAINLY if she does manage to find and contact these people ONCE ONLY.....for the benefit of herself, the horse and the current owners. Unless of course, they welcome your concern and your continuing communication with them. They may .... or may not. So, test the waters, but be prepared to back off if they do not appreciate your concern for their horse.*

They may see your concern as you trying to get her back, which you DID state is something you would like to do, so they wouldn't be entirely wrong in thinking that, Would they? How they react to that is anyone's guess. Some may find it endearing and reassuring that you want to be a part of this horse's life again and are concerned for her, others may find it threatening and/or annoying. It could go either way.


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## WSArabians (Apr 14, 2008)

I keep in regulat contact with almost everyone I have bought from or sold too. I sold four to one family and asked the other day in my holiday note if they had updated pictures to share. No response yet, but I will leave it at that. This is always a frantic time of year.
I like to keep tabs where "my" horses go, lest I find something I have produced starving or in a kill pen, so I think it's okay... So long as everyone is reasonable.


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

WSArabians said:


> I like to keep tabs where "my" horses go, lest I find something I have produced starving or in a kill pen, so I think it's okay... So long as everyone is reasonable.


I understand your reasoning, but if someone didn't want you keeping "tabs" on them, would you find that *un*reasonable? or would you be understanding that people see things differently, either by nature, or by life experiences (as in us having a stalker after Beau)? Would you think US unreasonable, considering our stalker, of NOT wanting anyone keeping tabs on what are now our horses? What about in general....what if the current owners do not welcome contact with you for whatever reason? Would you still sell to them or no?

Just curious as so many of you see this from the seller's point of view and I am wondering if you realize that SOME fine, respectable horse owners may not want you keeping tabs on them or asking them questions about their horse's care and well being.


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## Cacowgirl (Feb 19, 2011)

Beausant-I can see this whole train of thought bothers you,& I can see why. That must be some horse! I'm glad you have him safe & sorry it cost you a friendship. I wish I could have learned more about my mare from her former owner, but that's water under the bridge. There are a couple I've sold in the last few years that I would like to know more about, but I'm not pursuing that any further. I know one is happy at a working ranch, & the other gaited mare is happy & safe at a "luxury" ranch near S. Diego-so that's enough for me. I've got plenty going on w/my life w/the 2 I ride now & can't wait to to retire & ride whenever I can.


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## WSArabians (Apr 14, 2008)

Beauseant said:


> I understand your reasoning, but if someone didn't want you keeping "tabs" on them, would you find that *un*reasonable? or would you be understanding that people see things differently, either by nature, or by life experiences (as in us having a stalker after Beau)? Would you think US unreasonable, considering our stalker, of NOT wanting anyone keeping tabs on what are now our horses? What about in general....what if the current owners do not welcome contact with you for whatever reason? Would you still sell to them or no?
> 
> Just curious as so many of you see this from the seller's point of view and I am wondering if you realize that SOME fine, respectable horse owners may not want you keeping tabs on them or asking them questions about their horse's care and well being.


Oh, I understand what your saying. Some peolle develop some very un-healthy habits. 
I bought a mare and a lady coming out to look at a gelding asked if she was for sale (she isn't and won't be). Three times that visit. Didn't buy the gelding and emailed several times, which went unanswered. The answer is still no, no matter how many times you ask me. And yeah, she was mildly irritating. 
This can go either way depending on people's attitude. Some welcome it, other's don't. So, as you say, tread carefully.


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## Skyseternalangel (Jul 23, 2011)

Beauseant said:


> People like the OP can be a horse owner's nightmare. Think of it from the other person's standpoint.
> 
> Did he regret having to sell her? YES
> 
> ...


I never thought about it this way... but I do have an ex owner stalker  and I've seen it on another occasion.. it can be scary.

Which is why I AM NEVER GIVING UP MY HORSE! Even if I have to be on a street corner! HE IS MINE! lol.


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

Skyseternalangel said:


> I never thought about it this way... but I do have an ex owner stalker  and I've seen it on another occasion.. it can be scary.


Your horse has a stalker also?? you are so right, it can be scary.... and frustrating. We have to literally HIDE our horse and only tell select few people where he actually is. If that isn't freaky, I don't know what is.


Cacowgirl,
I seriously don't know what this stalker lady is going on about. She has a trail riding business and doesn't even LIKE thoroughbreds!! So i have no idea why she is fixated on Beau. 

The BO's reasoning I understand. She is a show person. She loves and has always wanted a gray TB. She rescued one some time ago but he has serious conformation issues and can never jump, and he is insane. She is a trained and certified instructor and trainer and even she can't ride him. Then along comes Beau, owned by non show people who just want to kiss and hug on him...and He is the most trainable horse she's ever seen. Her words. She rode him for us a few times to evalute his potential. When i asked what he was good for...she threw up her hands and said "Absolutely ANYTHING", and she had tears in her eyes. She thinks we are wasting a good horse. Perhaps we are in some people's eyes...and I understand that. I do not hold that against her, and I wish we could be friends again....but we cant. Not as long as we own Beau....and i will say this, the only thing that can take my sweet boy from me is God. 

Thanks for understanding my feelings on the issue, everyone. With a crazy lunatic stalking our horse, a lost friendship over the same horse and Epona's owner wanting to buy her back....we would be very very gun shy about past owners asking questions about our horses.

Others may or may not feel the same way for reasons of their own....so it is best for the OP to proceed cautiously and back off quickly if the current owners are not receptive to her ...


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## Skyseternalangel (Jul 23, 2011)

Beauseant said:


> Your horse has a stalker also?? you are so right, it can be scary.... and frustrating. We have to literally HIDE our horse and only tell select few people where he actually is. If that isn't freaky, I don't know what is.
> 
> 
> Thanks for understanding my feelings on the issue, everyone. With a crazy lunatic stalking our horse, a lost friendship over the same horse and Epona's owner wanting to buy her back....we would be very very gun shy about past owners asking questions about our horses.
> ...


Not as intense as yours. Honestly I'm worried about contacting any previous owners of his because they were so terrible and they might find some freakish way to take him back.. and that would destroy both of us. 
But his current previous owner is more supportive than stalkery.. but they have their moments. 

I completely understand how you feel on this, and it's always good to consider everything the other party feels. 

I hope one day you don't have to look over your shoulder to ensure the safety and happiness of your horses.


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

Skyseternalangel said:


> I hope one day you don't have to look over your shoulder to ensure the safety and happiness of your horses.


 
:--(
Thank you for that sentiment..You brought tears to my eyes....Our whole family has suffered because of this. Luckily, most people have no idea what is like to have to hide your horse like some dirty family secret. Or to know how it feels to distrust everyone in your horse circle, always be on your guard what you say about him and to whom, and to worry that some day when you go to the farm, he won't be there.....

My adult daughter actually has nightmares that people try to steal her gray baby....


And I hope none of you ever have to choose whether to keep your horse or your friend..... :-(

But pics like these remind me it's all been worth it, even hiding him from lunatics...and lost friendships....


My son with the horse he's spent the last two years training, and who he risked his own life during a freak snowstorm to save.....


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## Skyseternalangel (Jul 23, 2011)

Beauseant said:


> :--(
> 
> My adult daughter actually has nightmares that people try to steal her gray baby....
> 
> ...


They wouldn't be a friend in my eyes .. it's immature and rude on their end to end a friendship due to another loved friend (your horse Beau.) Seriously.. I wouldn't miss her. You had good times, but good friends don't do that to each other. 

Your poor daughter and your son who has done so much for Beau and loves him very much. 

You've given Beau life and security and of course lots of love.

Enjoy your life with him =) and lovely Epona


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## SmallTownGypsy (Dec 17, 2011)

Beauseant, I am so sorry for what you have gone through and understand why you feel the way you do.

I guess such a thought never occurred to me. I suppose I've been lucky. Most of the dealings I've had with selling, giving up, buying, or adopting have all gone so well. I've kept in touch if the other person wanted and others have kept in touch with me if I wanted.

It has actually even led to finding a wonderful friend. I sold her my Spotted Draft about six years ago. She was sixteen and crazy about Johnny Depp. lol I've seen her grow up, get married, and just recently she had a baby girl. All because I sold her a horse. (*Edited To Add*: I wanted to clarify, she didn't do those thing because I sold her the horse. I got to be a part of her life as she did those things because I sold her a horse.)

So I hope the OP has some luck and finds that the horse is owned by someone like me or my friend who would be happy to let her know how she's doing. Though obviously, the people who bought the horse may very well want to keep her. As long as it's a good home, the OP should be able to rest easy with that knowledge.


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## lauraetco (Sep 14, 2011)

What? People stalk horses? That has to be unusual! I hope.
I don't see any harm in trying to find your old horse to ask how she's doing. I also don't see any harm in asking if they are willing to sell her. If they are not, you'll have to just accept it. Maybe they'll at least take your name and number and offer to contact you if they decide to sell in the future.
Good luck and don't be a crazy stalker...lol


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

You are so right, Sky....a GOOD friend wouldn't make their friend make such a choice. I guess I shouldn't feel so bad about it since there is nothing I would have done differently anyhow.....and Beau is worth whatever we have to endure. He's been such a joy and inspiration in our lives.....

And if weird stalkers and jealous ex friends are the price we have to pay....then so be it!!!

Us horse people often feel very deeply about our horses, even ex horses, as the OP does....I hope she finds her horse and that the people can put her mind at ease as to the horse's welfare. And that she is ALSO prepared for the possibility that if she finds the horse, the owners may not welcome her seeming intrusion into their lives....


OP, keep us posted on your search.


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## Cacowgirl (Feb 19, 2011)

Beau certainly sounds like a great horse. Knowing that he can do anything-I would think it would be a lot of fun to try different things w/him. My Arab was trained in WP as a youngster, & I'm wanting to try him out w/my English saddle next year. I would love to do more little "trail" jumps w/him, but he was trained to step over everything, so he hasn't been real receptive to the idea yet.


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

Cacowgirl, I suppose from the ex BO's standpoint, Beau is a great horse. He is everything she wanted as in a highly trainable, healthy, gray Thoroughbred with hooves like iron and no known racetrack injuries or illness. She's a show girl, she thought that he could dominate the show scene...winning them both fame and ribbons with his talent, and of course, his coloring.....I have been told that "grays are hot in the show ring". At least, around here they are.

Perhaps we were wrong not to take her up on her offer to train and show him FOR us.....what better way to get free, quality training, right? BUT, the show scene she's in is hectic, and would require ALOT of time be spent with him, and on show days we wouldn't see him at all. And all decisions concerning his feed, turnout and etc would be left up to her. We would have been owners in name only, it would be almost like we had to make an appointment to see our horse.....control of him and his life would be mostly in her hands. And we are just too selfish to want to share him. right or wrong, we just couldn't do it...and i suppose in her mind she was thinking "Since YOU aren't planning on taking advantage of his talent, WHY won't you let me"....

We love Beau not for his potential or his coloring....we just love his personality. Once we got him past his initial disrespect and bossy off track Thoroughbred mindset, he became the most amazing horse friend anyone could hope to own. He is a big gray dog, really....he licks, he nuzzles, he falls asleep with his head on your shoulder. He's calm and respectful and funny....he's everything we want in a horse, he's everything the ex BO wanted in a horse....even though we both wanted different things.

I know alot of you are show people and can relate to the ex BO's mindset...

What are we doing with him? well....nothing actually. He's a fantastic riding horse, indoors....outdoors he is a bundle of excited energy, a gallping machine....here where we now board, we have no indoor arena. And out of me and my husband and adult son and daughter, the only one skilled enough to ride him outdoors in my son. But he is six feet two and weighs 225 lbs. He is too big to ride a TB. Our farrier says that my son is not too big and that Beau could carry my son's weight, but TBs are used to carrying 100 lbs, not 225....my son rode him three times in the last two years, but refuses to do so anymore. he's afraid he'll hurt his back.... so, he is a pasture puff. A loved and treasured pasture puff.

Laura, yes, i think horse stalking is rare. I just don't understand how we got so "lucky" We never expected things to turn out this way when we decided to buy a second horse....I was looking to buy a calm, docile, black and white paint QH and live a nice, normal life....:? We ended up with an energetic,athletic, gray OTTB who lives on top of a mountain at a secluded farm because he is being stalked by a crazy woman stalker.....


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## LilTuffGirl (Nov 14, 2011)

- Her registered name is Boston's Bit 'O Honey



And in no way have I been even CLOSE to stalker status. The woman I sold her to is INSANELY upset with the situation and wants me to push the woman she GAVE her to. She was done wrong and I see why she is upset but it will not make ME push the other woman to give me more info. 

You have to remember both the woman I sold her to and I lost HUMAN loved ones along with this horse. There is a lot of emotion tied up in this horse! Both of us had this horse as a "dream horse" and both of our "other halves" bought this horse for us. 

My ex and I were both young. I was trying to start my life in a good career and he was a police officer. I finally got the guts to do what I wanted to do and be a police officer but in NC you go into the academy unpaid. That left him to pay for rent and horse. Boarding was juuuussstt about the same amount as rent was! I did get a job but in no way did it come close to enough! 

It killed us both to have to sell that horse! He absolutely adored her as well! 

Him and I didn't work out because we were young and because he was seriously over protective. But we ALWAYS stayed close friends. even when it had to be a secret to his girlfriends lol

We talked about Honey shortly before he killed himself. He said how much he loved that horse and would love the chance to see her again. He had learned he had a liver problem and if he didn't get a transplant he wasn't going to live another year. He would talk about all the things he wanted to do before he died... all the things he would miss. In NO way did I think he would have done what he did. Hell he even messaged ME that morning asking if I was ok.. That he was worried about ME! We talked until the afternoon... that night he freakin' shot himself.... It has been THE ultimate hardest thing I have ever been through. I was going to find him someone to donate a portion of their liver. I didn't know my blood type but had it arranged to get it typed to see if I could help. Hell my dad said if he was a match he would help.

I'm not going to tell her new owner I want her back and I want her back now. I want to be assured she is at this amazing huge farm getting the attention she has always gotten. 
I am worried that it was said he wanted this horse for his kids. She's an arabian.. has always been spunky with her little arabian personality. If she's not the right fit for them I'd love the chance to buy her back. I am financially stable (hell I work two great jobs) and am more than capable to give her a great home.

She was part of my family. She will always be an important part of me. 

I'm sorry for what you've been through but you can't just throw everyone into the same category. If someone inquires on a horse it shouldn't hurt you one bit to give a quick update and put someone at ease about their loved horse. 

I didn't go deep into the story to the woman I talked to. Just told her i'd really like to hear from her present owner.. would like to know she's ok from him. Would like him to know if he isn't using her or doesn't want to keep her i'd love the chance to buy her back. I don't want to drive to his farm to see her.. I don't want contact with her - aka intrude on his life. Just want that peace of mind.


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## LilTuffGirl (Nov 14, 2011)

Oh yea, I had a golden retriever I got as a pup when I was married. Got a divorce and took nothing but my dogs, bed, car, and tv... Paid a LOT more in rent just to keep the dogs. Sadly the pup ate a massive hole in the carpet lol so my landlord said the dog had to go. :-( She agreed to let me keep my "older" golden but said not the pup. 
I found him a good home about an hour away. He and I still talk and he sends me updated photos. He just told me how the pup got in trouble for hurting one of the smaller dogs (his mom has a few little Pomeranians). I offered to take the dog back since i'm moving to my own "farm" now.

In no way does he find me offensive or stalkerish (although he probably wouldn't mind if I did stalk.. lol)

And I feel VERY grateful that he has no problems letting me know how my old pup is. He understands bad situations happen!


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

LilTuffGirl said:


> -
> 
> I'm sorry for what you've been through but you can't just throw everyone into the same category. If someone inquires on a horse it shouldn't hurt you one bit to give a quick update and put someone at ease about their loved horse.


 
Did you actually read thoroughly through all the posts I bothered to post to you on this subject or did you just skim through them?

BECAUSE i said to you MULTIPLE times that the current owners MAY or MAY NOT appreciate you asking questions and hunting down your ex horse. I said it many times, but i guess you missed it every time. I did NOT throw "everyone into the same category"........ and whether someone inquires on a horse and it "hurts you one bit" or not is totally up to the individuals who own the horse now....and for whatever reason. 

I'll state what I stated before mulitple times. The current owners may find your care and concern endearing and welcome you into their lives with open arms....OR they may find your questions and INTRUSION into their lives and slam the proverbial door shut in your face. you need to be prepared in case the latter scenario is the one that you are faced with. I brought this up because while your search may turn up all butterflies and roses, it also may gain you enemies and anger.....and if you are not prepred to back off IF that happens, a lawsuit.

It seems as if anyone implies that things MAY not go the way you want, that person is "throwing everyone into the same category", making generalizations and are being antagonistic towards you somehow....?????


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## Dresden (Jun 24, 2011)

I have to be honest, I'm a very private person and somewhat reclusive. I've never had a horse stalker but have been stalked myself years ago. I agree 100% with Beausant. If one of Luckys owners from long past (not the girl I bought him from though) contacting me out of nowhere and offering to buy him an intrusion. I would be uncomfortable with anyone tracking me down that way. Beausant is right. You need to prepare yourself for the possibility that they will NOT welcome a sudden stranger into their lives
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

Dresden said:


> I have to be honest, I'm a very private person and somewhat reclusive. I've never had a horse stalker but have been stalked myself years ago. I agree 100% with Beausant. If one of Luckys owners from long past (not the girl I bought him from though) contacting me out of nowhere and offering to buy him an intrusion. I would be uncomfortable with anyone tracking me down that way. Beausant is right. You need to prepare yourself for the possibility that they will NOT welcome a sudden stranger into their lives
> _Posted via Mobile Device_


 
Dresden says it much better than I did!! Thank you!! 

I am not trying to start a fight with the OP, only trying to help her to understand that what she is doing MAY not be appreciated by the current owners of the horse. SOME people are protective of their horses AND *of their privacy* and SOME will not appreciate someone appearing out of nowhere asking questions about THEIR horse

If that ruffles the OP's feathers or makes her feel that she needs to go on the defensive, that was not my intent. And it shows a certain inability to understand the current owners MAY see her as a threat, an annoyance or worse....a stalker. 

It is not "throwing everyone into the same category" as she accused me of doing, it is stating a simple fact .... we do not all agree or see things in the same light.

Preparing yourself mentally that your search COULD backfire is wise. JMO


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## Cacowgirl (Feb 19, 2011)

Beauseant-since the horse is yours & seems to be happy w/all the love & attention he gets it's probably a much better life than the hustle & bustle of a heavy show life-that could lead to a lot of problems, given that he sounds a little high-strung. As to weight carrying-there are VERY few people that only weigh 100 pounds-I would probably have to go back to junior high for that weight, I feel that your son should ride him as it would engage his mind & develope his muscles. I'm not saying work him into a lather or anything-but some slow conditioning, & bring him along to carry the weight & balance himself at different speeds & be responsive to some aids. He'd probably enjoy it. Can you build a round pen? Just a thought. & I know about stalkers as it happened to me & it was very scary.


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

Cacowgirl said:


> . As to weight carrying-there are VERY few people that only weigh 100 pounds-I would probably have to go back to junior high for that weight, I feel that your son should ride him as it would engage his mind & develope his muscles.


Our farrier is of the opinion that Beau would be able to carry Jared's weight without issues, as you said of course....with slow conditioning!! But i figured that he's a farrier and not a vet, so does he really know that carrying so much weight for even a short period of time wouldn't hurt Beau?? BUT, you have given me a great idea, when the vet comes in the spring (hopefully we wont need him sooner!!:shock to float Epona's teeth and for spring vaccinations, I will have him give his opinion of the situation. I SHOULD have asked him when he was here to float Beau's teeth a few weeks ago, but at that time we were (and still are) all obsessed with Beau's choke tendencies....and having Jared ride him just didn't enter my mind. 

We contacted his trainer when he was on the track a while back and he stated "he will make a good riding horse. he's got the temperment for it". Which translates into "he's a racing failure". LOL:lol:

Seriously, Beau was an extremely high strung horse when we first got him only 3 months off the track, but with two years of extensive NON RACEHORSE training he has become a wonderful family...pet.....his manners, except at feeding time, are exemplary!! He is affectionate and friendly....and very obedient.

So, I am going to definately have a vet evaluation of the possibility of Beau being able to carry Jared's weight..... don't know why i didn't think of it before....:?


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## Cacowgirl (Feb 19, 2011)

Great! happy to hear that.


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## demonwolfmoon (Oct 31, 2011)

Beausent: I know you tell the OP to read your post and that you aren't lumping her immediately into the same category as your "horse stalker" but I have to agree...you are rather PASSIONATE about it, and it does sound like you are implying that her tracking them down will result in negativity.
You may not feel like it....but I read it that way.

People's negativity, and how they react are why I prefer to avoid social interactions to be honest. It's all very unpleasant. And it's also why this last attempt of mine at fostering animals will be my last. I took in four kittens, all FEMALE, and I have one going home to a person I can TRUST. The others I refuse to give out over Craigslist to people I don't know who may not have their best interests at heart, and may not spay or take care of them. And I guess that emailing to make sure they did these things would make me a stalker. 0.o
Since I can't make sure that people will spay and not have them out popping out litter after litter of kittens, I'd rather keep them until they are spayed, and if an adopter comes up later (that I can trust), I'll re-evaluate. 

It may seem off topic, but I can understand both sides of the situation...if someone tells you to back off, do so...but if you don't make the effort, you'll regret missing what may have been an opportunity.


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

demonwolfmoon said:


> I can understand both sides of the situation...if someone tells you to back off, do so...but if you don't make the effort, you'll regret missing what may have been an opportunity.


 
How is that different from what I stated a page back as quoted below???



> Us horse people often feel very deeply about our horses, even ex horses, as the OP does....I hope she finds her horse and that the people can put her mind at ease as to the horse's welfare. And that she is ALSO prepared for the possibility that if she finds the horse, the owners may not welcome her seeming intrusion into their lives....
> 
> 
> OP, keep us posted on your search.


SOME of you are either misreading or misunderstanding my posts as what I have quoted is saying the same as demonwolf's quote. I have no idea why my statements are so cloudy and obscured to some. My statements seem clear and concise to me....


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## LilTuffGirl (Nov 14, 2011)

I think it's because you are leaning more towards everyone would hate to hear from their horses past owner. 

And also because it's common sense not to have your hopes up. Life is filled with ups and downs and I am FOR SURE one that never expects the best outcome. I never expect A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G to be easy either since it never seems to turn out that way. 

Never once did I say I was going to bug the crap out of anyone. I was hoping someone would know the mare and share my story to her owner. I've gone as far as I can - now I leave it in the hands of fate. 

I do wish I could make the woman I sold her to feel better but I can't. She is very very upset about the mare being sold when she wasn't suppose to be. Especially right after she was given to the family. The family didn't even tell her the mare wasn't working out for them they just sold her.


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## demonwolfmoon (Oct 31, 2011)

Beauseant said:


> How is that different from what I stated a page back as quoted below???
> 
> 
> 
> SOME of you are either misreading or misunderstanding my posts as what I have quoted is saying the same as demonwolf's quote. I have no idea why my statements are so cloudy and obscured to some. My statements seem clear and concise to me....


How many paragraphs and posts did you spend on the other point of view, that of the "horse stalker"? xD

That's how it's different.
Your point may seem concise to you, but perhaps due to your experience, you are leaning VERY heavily towards the negative....


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## demonwolfmoon (Oct 31, 2011)

LilTuffGirl said:


> The family didn't even tell her the mare wasn't working out for them they just sold her.


Heh. It's hard not to be upset about that. What is it they say? "Profit is king"?


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## VelvetsAB (Aug 11, 2010)

_I completely understand what you are saying Beau. Some owners may be ok with the contact, while others wouldn't be. Not that hard. _


_In my opinion...for what it is worth...._

_OP, you SOLD the horse. That means that the horse no longer belongs to you. Sure, you may have a very significant emotional attachment to it, but you still SOLD it. If you had wanted to keep the horse, you should have full leased it out to someone, and retained ownership._

_Just like the lady who you sold her to....she gave the horse up/sold her...so now the horse is no longer her concern either, even if the horse was supposed to go to a "forever home"._


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## Beauseant (Oct 22, 2010)

Well, I can certainly understand how the woman would feel betrayed by them selling the horse.

Too bad she didn't put a clause in the sales contract stating that either you or her or both be contacted before the horse was sold.....:-( 

And my intent was not to make you feel as if you were acting as a stalker or that what you are trying to do is harassment....I was only stating that sometimes the current owners may not react positively to your quest to find your ex horse as you seem very emotionally attached to this horse, and sometimes, when this happens, our minds and hearts don't want to consider the possibility that things may not go well in that the current owners may resent you or that your horse is not being cared for properly....

It's so difficult to get your hopes up too high, then have to deal with a disappointment later....and it seems to me, you've had an awful lot of troubles to deal with already in your life. 

I seriously and sincerely hope you find your horse and that she is either loved or they sell her back to you.... I also sincerely hope you keep us all updated as we are interested in hearing how this turns out, and all of us are hoping for a happy outcome for you, the woman, and the horse.

And if some of you find me dwelling on the negative side then you are not wrong. I AM dwelling on the possibilty of a negative outcome and that is why I posted MY negative experience with a horse stalker.....because others may also feel wary and nervous about strangers appearing out of nowhere asking questions about a horse that is now theirs. I am not the only one who would feel discomfort from this. There ARE others out there who value their privacy, and will not appreciate it being intruded upon.

*As Velvet said, this is not hard to understand. And I have no idea why stating this common fact is causing conflict.*


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## VelvetsAB (Aug 11, 2010)

_Yes, but as everyone knows, "first buy backs" or whatever you want to call them, do not always hold up legally. So in reality, this could have still turned out the same._


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## LilTuffGirl (Nov 14, 2011)

It probably would have turned out the same. The woman I sold her to had just lost her husband - she wasn't thinking legal terms. She was hoping to still have contact with the horse... As I did! I'll just blame it on my ex husband  She was offered back to me and I jumped for joy! Told my ex husband and he said absolutely not. That horses are expensive. I said not any more than my motorcycle is! I told him i'd sell it if I had to I wanted my mare back. HUGE fight... I lost.. Hell even lost my motorcycle to him in the divorce lol 
Lesson learned... actually life itself is all just one big lesson!!! 

Honestly I don't think I ever expected to find or get Honey back. As amazing as it would be and as much as I could cry just to hug her again.. I don't see it happening. Things like that don't happen for me. Hence why i've been keeping my options open about other horses. 

I just really hope she is on a huge farm and is actively being ridden/ cared for and isn't just part of the pasture...


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## Cacowgirl (Feb 19, 2011)

Yes, life is full of hard lessons-I've certainly had my share. But from the first, w/every guy I've made it clear-my horses come first! They are totally dependent-a guy can take care of himself if need be, but the horses can't feed themselves, clean their corrals,or make appts. So if they don't like those terms~bye~bye! I've considered myself a horse-woman since I was a teen-ager & I've been known to buy hay instead of groceries. When I didn't have money, I've been down to 108 pounds! but my horses looked OK. After being widowed, I did sell a colt I'd raised to a dear friend-hated to do it, but it was a forever home & I knew he was well taken care of.


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## annaleah (Jul 6, 2010)

Maybe someone on here with an AHA membership will chime in and help. Be able to search the horses name and find out her current owners and where she is. I had a wonderful person like that years ago help me in that way,and it eased all my worries when I found out he was in a wonderful home. I hope it happens for you...good luck!


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## BarrelRacer23 (Aug 17, 2011)

This thread kinda gave me a headache. But I will state I've contacted a few of the people that have my past horses, just emailed after a few months asked how a pony was doing the girl offered to send me pictures. I'm friends with another horse I trained new owners on facebook so I get to see how happy and fat she is in her new home. And with my new horse I've talked to all of his past owners, his last owner asked to stay in touch and add me on facebook, other one found me on a forum and I emailed his breeder to let her know where he was now. She wanted to stay in touch. Doesn't bother me, shows there's nothing their hiding from me.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## EquusB (Dec 31, 2011)

*Try posting her at Old Horse Tracer*

www.oldhorsetracer.com


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