# my trainer is getting banned from my barn!



## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

yes. it would be realistic to stick with and make the effort to go to someone who has been a miracle worker to you and your horse.


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## cakemom (Jul 4, 2010)

I trailer weekly to a trainer.
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Elsa5 (May 4, 2014)

Ok thanks! Ive never heard of anyone trailering to a trainer every week!


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## stevenson (Sep 12, 2011)

Does your trainer have a barn ? If so, Maybe you could board with her . 
she must have some property since she has an arena


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## churumbeque (Dec 20, 2009)

Your Barn owner can't it up with h unique personality for an hour a week?


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## Elsa5 (May 4, 2014)

Im not willing to switch barns. My BO and the other boarders there have helped me so much they are like family, not to mention they are only 2 miles from my house.

My BO can have an anger problem so talking to him about it wouldnt be the best idea.

She does have property but sold her horses a few years ago.


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## Elsa5 (May 4, 2014)

She boarded her horse there several years ago and I believe there was a few problems. Shes at the barn a few times a week to train my mare and she works with her best friends 3 horses there.


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## ArabLuver (Aug 27, 2014)

If this trainer is doing a good job with your mare, then trailer to her! She's only 15 miles away. One of my friends trailers her horse 65 miles one way every week to go and have lessons with her favorite trainer. (Her horses are at home with her.)


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## Blue (Sep 4, 2011)

Go! Train with who is helping you. It's a no brainer.


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## DuckDodgers (May 28, 2013)

churumbeque said:


> Your Barn owner can't it up with h unique personality for an hour a week?


My guess is that there are some serious issues caused by the "unique" personality from the trainer or the barn owner. I've known many people to get banned from barns, sometimes the people were problem causers and sometimes the barn owners were nuts. Sometimes both. People don't just get banned from the property for no reason at all, though I won't try and speculate as to what the reasons are in this scenario. 

But, I will say that I'd be a bit hesitant to keep my horse at a place where you admit that the barn owner has "anger problems". The horse world is crazy enough and I'd just rather avoid being around people who make it even crazier. If you can't even have a conversation about it with him without angering him then that really indicates a problem. 

That said, I know of plenty of folks that trailer to their trainers regularly. Mot necessarily on a weekly basis, but there's nothing wrong with if you're willing to go through the effort. Particularly if she really did help you that much with your horse.


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## loveduffy (Dec 22, 2011)

people trailer there horse to trainer all the time around here in NY so I say go for it as far as staying were you are if you and your horse are happy then stay if not them go it is your horse remember that


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## Elsa5 (May 4, 2014)

DuckDodgers said:


> churumbeque said:
> 
> 
> > Your Barn owner can't it up with h unique personality for an hour a week?
> ...


I feel like its more of my BOs problem then hers. During my lessons he gets mad at her over the littlest things that wouldnt bother a normal person. But he tends to be 2 faced to everyone at the barn.

My horse is very well cared for there, any other barn would have kicked me out with how many problems they use to have with her, I almost was several times.

When I would be handing her myself he would be sneaky about it but would always check in on me and wouldn't go to bed until they saw the barn lights turn off. 

When she was sick and in quarantine for 2 months he would do drive bys to check on her and call me often asking how she was doing.

I love the facilities and like I said they are like family there. They have done a lot for me and I couldn't imagine leaving. He just gets mad very easily but calms down quickly. Im use to it though my dad's the same way so I hardly notice it yet all my friends are terrified of him lol.


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## loveduffy (Dec 22, 2011)

if your trainer has a barn them you could move if not stay it works for you and your horse and that is a big thing


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## Elsa5 (May 4, 2014)

As to her unique personality. In 8th grade she was in AP classes and graduated high school early. She has been riding dressage, jumping, and cross country most of her live (30 ish years) has worked with national level horses. And doesn't seem to have many friends. Shes very serious and can come off rude but she means well. Can be hard to talk to and shes a bit of a know it all. Her personality and the personality of most of the boarders doing mix well. Plus the whole dressage rider in a gaming barn...


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## tinyliny (Oct 31, 2009)

I wonder if she's Aspergers?


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## Elsa5 (May 4, 2014)

tinyliny said:


> I wonder if she's Aspergers?


She actually could be! Never thought of that. Either way I watch when she works with my mare and that woman is the one person that can do anything with that horse, I would sell her to her in a heart beat. I don't care how awkward or rude she can come off as, as long as my horse is making progress I'm happy!


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## stevenson (Sep 12, 2011)

so if you will not leave barns, and will not talk to the BO , then if you want the same trainer you will need to trailer to her property if she will allow it. 
I would not go assuming she has any illness , that is a very large assumption.


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## Rideordie112 (Dec 7, 2013)

I trailer to lessons twice a week!
_Posted via Mobile Device_


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## Saddlebag (Jan 17, 2011)

I don't get why the BO would share that info with your sister. Be careful of what your sister told you. There's an old expression "what you heard is not what I said". She may have mis-interpreted what the BO told her. Try to ignore what you've been told. You've listened to gossip. And everyone adds their own spin when spreading gossip - human nature.


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## Dustbunny (Oct 22, 2012)

tinyliny said:


> I wonder if she's Aspergers?


My exact thought!!!! I worked with someone just like that. Driven, great at what she did, very focused on HER task. Another co-worked had a brother with this syndrome and he said she showed all the signs. That knowledge helped me let a lot of things slide on by, as things were not personal.

Too bad your BO can't see that.

I'd stick with that trainer!!!!!!!!


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## horselovinguy (Oct 1, 2013)

*Don't *look for problems,* don't* make problems and* don't *speculate if someone has a problem....

You _*may*_ have a problem....
And a easy solution.... _till it is presented to *you* though_..._*leave it alone!*_

As most have said.... trailer to your lesson{s} if need be, period.

Work with the trainer as needed....go back to the barn and do "your homework", return for another lesson and more homework....

*It works*....hundreds do it successfully every week, some many times every week. Trailer in for a lesson, trailer home and practice...and round and round it goes.

Don't make someone else's problems yours...
_Till you are told to your face by the barn owner, *not* the rumor mill_... that that trainer is no longer permitted on the premise..._don't own the problem nor look for one._

Keep a low profile, _*stay out of barn gossip* _and do your own thing with this trainer and let the barn workers taking care of your horse do their job.

Enjoy the progress you are making....be safe!!


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## Elsa5 (May 4, 2014)

Dustbunny said:


> tinyliny said:
> 
> 
> > I wonder if she's Aspergers?
> ...


Sounds like her! The first time she worked with my mare she was there for 5 hours just working on getting her to walk calmly on a,lounge line! She stays however long she feels she needs too. She has VERY clear boundaries but is also forgiving, gives lots of praise but is quick to correct which is exactly what my mare needs


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## mslady254 (May 21, 2013)

is it realistic? depends...do you have a trailer or would you have to borrow one? does your horse load well or would you need to work on improving that? Is the small amount of extra fuel expense a financial issue? Do you have the extra time once a week to do it? Do you already know that this trainer would welcome you coming to her property with your horse ? 

I can't think of any other possible issues off the top of my head. If these are all greenlighted..then why the heck not???? I trailer regularly for lessons--not every week, but a couple of times a month,and would go weekly if our schedules allowed for it. I happen to think it's a great experience for the horse (and me) to trailer often,,I truly think he enjoys being at a different environment for a change of pace, and his trailer loading attitude is better and better.

Good luck!
Fay


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## Zexious (Aug 2, 2013)

I don't see an issue with trailering to lessons--I know quite a few individuals that do it. Good luck


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## Nokotaheaven (Apr 11, 2012)

Stick with her! Sounds like she's making all the difference... I know someone who is a trainer. She met this lady who had a ottb that was so hard to handle that it took two people to lead him. She worked with him and now a 5 year old can walk him around no problem. She eventually moved her horses to the barn to be with her friend and work with that horse. She and the barn owner, though, are two complete opposites and have two completely different perspectives on training and how things should be run around the barn, so she left when her horse ended up getting sick. She still goes back there to work with the ottb though, she's what makes all the difference with him. If it weren't for her he may have very well turned into something so dangerous that he'd be euthanized.
So, stick with your trainer


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## Palomine (Oct 30, 2010)

Mare has been through a lot with all of the different trainers and locations and situations she has been in since you got her.

Sadly I have to wonder about anyone that takes 5 hours to walk a horse on a lunge line calmly.

And the advice about not looking for problems is sound, best to just see what happens.

Bumbling around, repeating what has been said to you, and talking about possible medical issues of someone, can backfire on you, and you could end up being asked to leave, or cause problems where none are currently.

Not to mention, you seem to have an awful lot of problems to begin with, always something going wrong.


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## Elsa5 (May 4, 2014)

Palomine said:


> Mare has been through a lot with all of the different trainers and locations and situations she has been in since you got her.
> 
> Sadly I have to wonder about anyone that takes 5 hours to walk a horse on a lunge line calmly.
> 
> ...


 Yes this past year has been very hard and just when everything seems to be going right something changes.

I wont be repeating anything, I was just worried and was thinking of a plan just in case.

And yes the 5 hrs says a lot about how bad my mare was. Walking isnt her favorite thing and shes pretty tense about everything. Now getting her to relax takes maybe 5-10 minutes


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## luvmydrafts (Dec 26, 2013)

keep your trainer...with all the hunting you did before you found her, there's no replacing her...




Elsa5 said:


> Im not willing to switch barns...
> My BO can have an anger problem so talking to him about it wouldnt be the best idea.


Your choice here...I know i pay my barn too much money to ever put up with someone's "anger problems" as part of the deal...first sign of issues like this and im gone within a month or two {however long it takes to find another barn}. i dont care if theyre right next door...im their customer and i expect them to treat me as such as long as i treat them with respect in turn...I'm sort of new to this forum but the one thing that amazes me the most is how many people I read about who are willing to deal with monster barn owners and managers...they are paying these ppl and still get treated like this, it is incredible...there are so many better barns out there and yeah I bumped into a few problem barns myself {not even in the realm of someone with "anger problems", mostly it was care issues}--I moved. I've never regretted moving out of a situation where I was afraid of someone...Seems their anger issue is going to impact you yet again if your trainer is banned and if this BO bans this person without even speaking to you first about it is outrageous...but if you are asking if it's worth it to trailer your mare 1x a week if you already have decided youre staying put, if this were my situation I would say yes...


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## DuckDodgers (May 28, 2013)

luvmydrafts said:


> keep your trainer...with all the hunting you did before you found her, there's no replacing her...
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I completely agree with what you're saying, but many areas do not have a lot of options when it comes to boarding. Unless you plan on buying your own property and keeping your horses to your own specifications then you'll have to deal with people issues to a certain degree. That's why I don't think it's always reasonable when folks suggest to move barns at the drop of a hat over personal issues. Of course- some issues such as violent personalities or horse care sometimes most definitely warrant a move!

Ask me how I know- I've got a few issues with my barn, but for a not tiny area the boarding options are limited around here.


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## Elsa5 (May 4, 2014)

There are many barns in my area but because I live in a "wealthy" community a majority of these are English training and breeding barns. They are also $300+ for pasture. 

My barn is mainly gamers. Very nice set up. Only $211. The horses are well cared for. I love the owner, he is very nice just has an anger management issue but calms down rather quickly. My dad is the same way so it doesnt bother me. This anger issue he has does not effect the care of my horse in any way otherwise I would leave in a heartbeat.


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## luvmydrafts (Dec 26, 2013)

Elsa5 said:


> There are many barns in my area but because I live in a "wealthy" community a majority of these are English training and breeding barns. They are also $300+ for pasture.
> 
> My barn is mainly gamers. Very nice set up. Only $211. The horses are well cared for. I love the owner, he is very nice just has an anger management issue but calms down rather quickly. My dad is the same way so it doesnt bother me. This anger issue he has does not effect the care of my horse in any way otherwise I would leave in a heartbeat.


that is good to hear! I wish you the best of luck in this.


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